He stood so long and still in front of the blank tombstone marker.
Ye Qingyu knelt beside him, his bruised face bleeding but with an earnest expression on his face. "For the sake of your queen, my sister, Ye Xiwu, let her go. Let her rest in peace."
A tear quietly rolled down his face. Tantai Jin sighed and approached the tombstone, and picked up the chisel to start carving the words he needed to say.
"Ye Xiwu, why do you keep saving me?"
"Because I love you."
Tantai Jin was taken aback by her words. "What do you mean by love?"
Ye Xiwu thought for a while. "Love is… when you don't want the other person to die. You want to always see him, and you feel happy when you do."
Tantai Jin smiled through his tears. He did feel happy whenever she was near. He just never understood it. When she smiled, it felt as if the sun had burst through his heart and warmed every cell in his body.
"Are you always this happy during New Year's?"
Ye Xiwu smiled at him. "This year is different," she said, her smile reaching her eyes. She turned to him, still with the smile on her face. "Don't worry, as long as you're with me, no one will bully you anymore, and we can be happy like this every New Year's." Her smile faltered a bit, and Tantai Jin raised an eyebrow at it. She shrugged, and looked up happily at the fireworks she conjured up with the Sketch charm.
Her face lit up with the various colors of the fireworks in the sky.
Her smile was the prettiest sight he had ever seen that New Year's eve, more incandescent than the fireworks in the sky. It was the most beautiful thing, the most precious thing, that he had ever beheld in his entire life. It was rare and unexpected, and she bestowed it freely on him.
He never deserved it, but she gave him her smiles willingly.
The chisel went deep into the stone.
"Tantai Jin."
Ye Xiwu planted a kiss on his cheek. "Thank you for saving my family and bringing them here to Jing Kingdom," she said, smiling at him.
Family. He never understood the concept, having been alone most of his childhood. His mother was dead, his father never even showed himself to him, and his brothers only came up to him to mock and taunt him and bully him. Xiao Lin came close to making him feel like he had a real brother, but they were bound to be enemies because of the kingdoms they belonged to.
Until he saw how happy Ye Xiwu was with her grandmother, her father, her brothers, and even at times her sister. They had doted on each other, always watching out for each other's happiness, supporting one another in their happiness and sorrows. Her grandmother was absolutely devoted to her, and even her last breath was spent ensuring Ye Xiwu's safety.
His hand trembled.
He had wanted a family with her.
He lowered the chisel, and raised his arm over his eyes to slow the tears that relentlessly flowed out of his eyes. When he had calmed himself down a bit, he gripped the chisel tightly and continued chipping away at the tombstone.
He saw that the light in her chambers was still on. He turned to Nian Baiyu and said, "You may go."
Nian Baiyu glanced at the lit chamber and nodded. "Yes Your Majesty." He turned around and left him.
Tantai Jin walked slowly towards Ye Xiwu's chambers. He paused briefly before the doors and exhaled before opening them.
"Ye Xiwu?" he called out, quickly scanning the room to find her. A smile tugged at his lips as he found her, sound asleep on the working table, head buried in her arms, a hand loosely clutching the frame of the red veil she was supposed to be embroidering. He knelt to be eye-level with her, and watched her as she slept, eyelashes fluttering slightly with every movement of her eyes under her eyelids. He considered waking her up, but instead, gently pried her fingers off the embroidery frame and herself off the table and carried her in his arms to lay her on her bed. She sleepily brushed him off once, but other than that, she quietly curled up in his arms. He tucked her in the blankets, and made sure she was sound asleep again before turning to the embroidery left on the table.
"The double lotus pattern symbolizes the prosperity of the wedded couple, and is to be sewn by the bride to pray for happiness in the marriage," the senior maid in charge of supervising the bridal clothes told him earlier in the day. "Lady Ye has to finish embroidering her veil by tomorrow, but it seems she might not make it on time."
Tantai Jin sat in front of the working table and took out the needle and thread from the box. Once, in exchange for some warm meals, his brothers had pushed him towards the sewing department, to learn the womanly arts of stitching and embroidery, as his pretty face makes him look more like a woman than a man. He chuckled as he threaded the needle, and began embroidering the double lotus pattern into Ye Xiwu's red veil, never even imagining in his wildest dreams that he would put those skills into use.
He carefully stitched every pattern into the veil, the promise of tomorrow burning bright in his heart. Gods above, he prayed as he wove the needle in and out of the cloth, I only wish to be with Ye Xiwu for the rest of my life.
The lotus bloomed into the veil, and before the rooster crowed, he put down the needle to admire the finished work. He carefully folded the veil and set it gently on the table, then went out of the room as quietly as he could before Ye Xiwu woke up.
A sob tore through Tantai Jin's throat. He remembered how the veil fluttered on Ye Xiwu's head as she walked towards him, the weighted bells on it tinkling and setting it in place to obscure her face. His heart soared whenever he took a glance at that veil, and the face hidden beneath it, finally feeling the happiness of being with the person he loved the most, and letting everyone and the heavens know that she is the person he wants to spend the rest of his life with.
The veil was neatly folded beside him, as was the jade he gave her at the wedding ceremony. All broken hopes.
"Ye Xiwu had worked hard to cook that porridge for him so I had to go in and put poison in it. That way, all her hard work will be put to waste, and all the people who loved her the most, will die," Ye Bingchang said without remorse.
Pian Ran was right. If only he had asked her… But that day in the Cold Palace, he had let his hatred of her get the better of him, and he had run out like a coward, away from Ye Xiwu, away from the truth…
Tantai Jin traced the engraved name on the tombstone. No, I never really hated you, Ye Xiwu. How can I? I am despicable. I am untrustworthy. I am capable of the most evil things that your nightmares have shown you. Even in my darkest moment, it wasn't you I really hated.
I hated myself.
And my hate has led to your death.
With nothing left to carve, Tantai Jin stood up, dropping the chisel.
The tomb of Ye Xiwu, the beloved wife of Tantai Jin.
Xxxxxxxxxx
He placed the last hair ornament on her hair and leaned back to look at her. He smiled.
She was as beautiful as she was on their wedding day.
Tantai Jin smoothed out Ye Xiwu's red silk gown. He himself had worn his own wedding clothes, to match hers. He cradled her in his arms one last time.
While he had looked up at the night sky with gladness in his heart, he saw her looking up at it with melancholy.
"What's wrong?" Tantai Jin asked.
Ye Xiwu shrugged. "It's just that, when I look up at the night sky, with the full moon glowing this bright, I remember the home I had… when I was young," she said. "There was a lake that was pure and cool in summer, and reflected the moonlight at night. I miss lying down on the banks of the lake, look up at the stars in the sky, while fireflies flew in the bushes."
"It sounds wonderful," Tantai Jin said. "Where is that lake?"
"Somewhere far away." Ye Xiwu turned to him and smiled. "Maybe someday I can take you there."
Tantai Jin smiled back. "Okay."
Tantai Jin caressed Ye Xiwu's face. "You promised me once that you'd take me to your home, where the lake is cool in summer," he said. "I will go with you, to see the stars you have seen, to be with you as you lay down on the banks of that lake." He laid her down gently, and with a sweep of his hand, knocked down all the candles that lit up the hall, their flames beginning to burn every single inch of the hall.
He laid himself down beside her and took her hand in his.
"Let's go home together," he whispered, and closed his eyes.