It hurts… everything hurts…
The enormous pressure of the power contained in the Bone-defining Seal bore heavily down on Cang Jiumin. Its malevolent essence pierced through every cell in his body, weaving itself through every sinew, pouring into his very blood, tying itself into the meridians of his nail-pierced heart.
It hurts…
"Cang Jiumin!"
He heard her voice as if she was miles away from him.
"Wake up, Cang Jiumin!"
As if he was hearing her through the waters of the Nether River.
"Don't give in to the seduction of the artifact!"
Come to me, my devil fetus.
Cang Jiumin opened his eyes. In front of him was the Ancient Devil God, the dark voice which had always haunted his every nightmare, smiling maliciously at the pain he was suffering.
Surrender yourself to me, my devil fetus, and I shall be reborn.
"Cang Jiumin!"
Her voice was stronger now, and a wave of pure energy shot through his heart, enveloping it in warmth and purity. "Cang Jiumin, wake up!"
Ye Xiwu…
The Ancient Demon God in front of him sneered. "Are you really going to listen to her? She, who had hated you, and tried to kill you several times?"
His heart pulsed with the pain of the six Soul-Slaying Nails embedded into it, and blood spilled through his lips.
"She who had left you all alone, wandering the netherworld endlessly, forever bearing the pain of being torn over and over again by the spirits of the dead, all for nothing?"
The scars all over his body suddenly opened again, cutting through his flesh, the pain scorching him as if he was immersed in the Nether River once again.
It hurts…
"You want everything to end now, don't you?" the Ancient Devil God taunted him, his image becoming clearer the closer the Bone-defining Seal was getting to his heart. "Let me help you. Surrender yourself to me, and I will make the pain go away."
The wave of clear energy kept the seal at bay.
"Cang Jiumin! Don't let the Bone-defining Seal enter your heart! Do you want to die?"
Don't die.
Cang Jiumin glared at the Ancient Devil God in front of him. "You won't get what you want," he muttered through clenched teeth. "I won't let you!" He summoned his own power and broke the Bone-defining Seal's hold on his heart, as Li Susu's warm energy cleared his body of the remaining dark powers. He pushed the seal out of his body, and the wave of dark energy dissipated, releasing him from the pressure and the pain. He fell down hard on the ground.
"Cang Jiumin!" He felt soft arms raise him up, and he opened his eyes.
He saw Ye Xiwu's face distorted in hate as she raised her hand to summon the Soul-slaying nails.
"Cang Jiumin, wake up!"
You are the Devil God.
Cang Jiumin gripped the arms that held him up. He smiled malevolently at the hateful face in front of him.
Pure warm energy poured into his mind, clearing it of the dark thoughts that rose up. Cang Jiumin blinked, and saw clearly in front of him the face of the Goddess Yuling.
Li Susu.
She touched her forehead with his and continued to send the warm energy into every fiber of his being. The wounds that opened up were healed slowly, the torn heart meridians were mended, and the exhaustion of fighting against the will of the Ancient Devil God were gently eased.
It's you.
When every hurt was eased, Li Susu released him and looked into his eyes. He saw in those eyes relief… and affection.
Cang Jiumin smiled at her.
The thought of devilizing… has always been up to a moment of you.
He closed his eyes and fell forward, his head resting on her shoulder. The scent of acacia flowers were his last sensation before he lost consciousness.
Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Cang Jiumin woke up to the smell of medicinal herbs.
"Junior Brother!" Zhang Hai exclaimed when he saw Cang Jiumin wake up.
"Senior Brother…" Cang Jiumin whispered, his throat dry. Noticing the hoarseness of his voice, Zhang Hai quickly poured him a cup of water and helped him drink.
"We thought we lost you," Zhang Feng said, teary-eyed as he looked at his junior brother. "We should have been with you! If we had…"
"…we would've been beaten to death by that demoness, Si Ying," Zhang Lin finished for him, raising an eyebrow at the younger Zhang Feng. "We barely held up our own against that bull-headed demon, how could we have survived her?"
"Hengyang Sect was also attacked?" Cang Jiumin asked in concern.
"It was more of a diversionary tactic by Jing Mie, to help Si Ying get to the Bone-defining Seal you and Senior Sister Li protected," Zhang Hai replied. He smiled proudly at his junior brother. "You did well."
At the mention of Li Susu, Cang Jiumin remembered. "How is Ye… Goddess Yuling?"
"Well, I should think," Zhang Hai replied. "She brought you back to the sect, unconscious and bloody, and told the healers to attend to you immediately. But we haven't seen her since."
"You and Goddess Yuling fought Si Ying side by side," Zhang Feng said. "How was it like?"
Zhang Hai smacked Zhang Feng on the head. "What do you mean how was it like?" he said, shaking his head at his junior brother. "Didn't you see the state our brother was in? If not for Senior Sister Li's healing abilities, our brother wouldn't have survived. She was wounded herself, but she turned away the healers and told them to focus on him instead."
Cang Jiumin lowered his head and looked down at his hands. She saved me, and protected me… again. "Do you know where I might find Senior Sister Li? I would like to show my gratitude to her."
"She must be at her residence at Mount Changze," Zhang Lin said. He smiled meaningfully at him. "I think if anyone deserves to look at Li Susu, it would be you, brother."
Xxxxxxxxxxxxxx
The steaming cup of tea in front of him was fragrant, but Cang Jiumin only had eyes for the woman in front of him.
"I would like to thank Senior Sister Li for saving me that day at the Shangqing Realm," Cang Jiumin began. "I owe you my life."
"You don't owe anything to me, brother," Li Susu said calmly. "You fought bravely against the demoness Si Ying, and prevented her from getting the Bone-defining Seal, so it should be the sect that owes you their lives."
Cang Jiumin's eyebrow twitched slightly. We both know what happened, he thought, staring hard at Li Susu, and trying to understand what her formality meant. But since she decided to treat him like any other fellow disciple, he decided to follow her lead.
"You are too generous with me, sister," Cang Jiumin replied. "I'm afraid that aside from showing you my gratitude, I would like to make a request of you."
"What is it?" Li Susu asked.
"I would like to ask for a drop of your blood," Cang Jiumin said. Li Susu blinked, and in that moment, various expressions flit across her face: shock, alarm… and fear. The last one pricked his heart.
"What for?" Li Susu asked, her face returning to its previous composure.
"Let me tell you my story," Cang Jiumin said. "I was born in Jing Kingdom 500 years ago, to the emperor and his concubine. My mother died when I was born, and my father hated me for it. My brothers bullied me until I was sent to Sheng Kingdom to be a hostage prince, and I remained in the palace until I married a general's daughter. Her name... was Ye Xiwu."
Li Susu had no reaction at the mention of Ye Xiwu's name, other than a slight twitch in her lips.
"At first, she was cruel, but one day, she suddenly changed. She fed me, clothed me, taught me things I didn't know… she was the first to be truly kind to me. She made me want to live again, and she saved me from death so many times."
Cang Jiumin took a shaky breath. Li Susu didn't speak, and remained composed as he was speaking. "She showed me how it was to love, and filled my heart with such joy that I thought it would burst," he continued. "But because of an irreparable mistake, I lost her… and she died. When she was gone, I thought about joining her in death, until someone told me about finding souls in the Nether River.
"I found my way to the Nether River, and started my search for her soul. Every day, I threw myself into the waters of the Nether River, enduring the unbearable pain of being torn apart little by little by the hungry spirits there, just to find her soul. I was in pain for so long that I didn't know if I was still alive. I endured, because I kept thinking, if I could just see her face again, I would gladly exchange my life for hers to repay her. But for 500 years, I couldn't find her soul."
Li Susu's lips trembled, and her face lost some color. She opened her mouth slightly, but closed it immediately.
"When I was nearly on my last breath, it was then that my master, Immortal Zhaoyou, found me by the banks of the Nether River, and brought me into Xiaoyao Sect. He saved me, and I became a disciple of the sect." Cang Jiumin took another deep breath. "That has been my experiences for the past 500 years."
"Why are you telling me this?" Li Susu asked, her voice slightly trembling.
"The Nether River didn't help me find Ye Xiwu's soul," Cang Jiumin said, still keeping his eyes on Li Susu, "but I read about a Soul-Gathering Array spell that can. However, this spell needs the blood of a pure divine body as a trigger."
"It also requires the heart blood of an enemy, and the tear of a lover," Li Susu replied coldly. "I suppose even if you have those, how are you going to get the flesh and hair of the deceased?"
"So you know," Cang Jiumin said.
"That spell is in the Book of Demonology, and is forbidden for any cultivating immortal to use," Li Susu replied icily. "Are you turning to dark magic just to revive a lost love to life?" When Cang Jiumin tried to reply, she cut him off. "Do you know of Zhuangzi's Dream of the Butterfly?"
"What?"
"You can think of Ye Xiwu as that butterfly," Li Susu said, "a beautiful dream, but a dream nevertheless. When you wake, everything disperses."
"Disperses? How can it disperse just like that?" Cang Jiumin said angrily. He stood, walked over to Li Susu, and took her by her shoulders. "Five hundred years have passed, and I have never once forgotten about her. I have seen her smile, seen her laugh, seen her cry. She hugged me, protected me, loved me, and hated me. Even if that was just a dream, if you abandon me in that dream, how do you expect me to wake up?"
"I don't understand what you're saying," Li Susu said, trying to look away from Cang Jiumin, but he forced her to look at him.
"You are Ye Xiwu," Cang Jiumin said. "You have the same demeanor, the same face, the same temperament. How can you make me believe otherwise? You can't even look at me properly in the eyes right now!"
Li Susu closed her eyes, then slowly opened them again to face Cang Jiumin. "I have woken up from my dream," she said coldly, her eyes like steel. "I don't care whether you wake up or not." Cang Jiumin opened his mouth to reply, but she cut him off. "Tantai Jin," she said, finally saying his mortal name, and confirming that she really was Ye Xiwu, "if you really want to make amends, then just stay in Xiaoyao Sect and remain its disciple." She raised her hands and took hold of his arms, pulling them down off her. "As for me, I am Li Susu, the daughter of Hengyang Sect's Chief, training in the Heartless Way to become a god, to fight against the threat of the Devil God and protect the realms. Our past is now over, and we have become strangers to each other."
Cang Jiumin's eyes were filled with pain, but Li Susu's gaze was steady and calm. "This is the path you and I must take," she said with finality, then stood and stepped away from him, facing the open window and turning her back on him.
Cang Jiumin clenched his fist.
"Heavens above!" Ye Xiwu cried out as she held up the divine essence she took out from her body, "I sacrifice my body, my vitality, and my life… to wish that we never meet again… in any life."
With a scream, she forced the divine essence inside his body, and took in the evil bone in hers, and the heavens poured down its heavenly energy down on them. When it dissipated, she smiled, closed her eyes, and fell.
He stood, and looked at Li Susu's silhouetted back. "When you said you didn't want to meet again," Cang Jiumin said despondently, tears falling silently down his face, "you meant it." When she didn't turn back to him, he sighed, and turned away, walking slowly out of the house.
Xxxxxxxxxxxx
As soon as Cang Jiumin left the house, Li Susu fell on her knees, tears streaming down her face.