A/N: I suck. We've established that. It's my new mantra. I mean it always kinda was. I do have an excuse. Clive Rosfield, and SquareEnix getting their raunch on. If you know, you know. Splattered my heart all over the damn place. Fuck you, Yoshi-P and I want that dlc post haste, you evil, evil man.
God, I'm high on hayfever meds, so fuck how this is going to read. I finished 5 minutes ago. Maybe 10, and then had to track down a text reader to sort my shit out. I can read something 50 times and still miss everything. Also, I refused to let my new laptop's grotesquely hugely-spaced keyboard get the better of me. I lost many battles, but won the war. So maybe 30 minutes ago.
What am I even doing with life? I need to finish this story by the end of January. FF7Rebirth is set to release and Zack Fair is my life, people. My. Fucked. Up. Life.
Footprints in the Sand
Chapter 30
It's been more than a week since I've gone running, and I struggle. I struggle so much I briefly consider giving up halfway and returning home, but I don't. My head's been a mess lately, and while Edward's a good distractor, he also has a habit of overloading me.
It's the hardest five-miles I've run in a long time, and as soon as I approach the Dutch Colonial, I slow my pace with as much relief as apprehension. I'm still reeling over what Esme said to Edward this morning. I have no idea how I'll even forgive her, let alone move past it, and Edward's brother? Him, I have no answers for. I can only conclude Rose put on such a convincing act that he fell for it.
Or maybe he just refuses to see what's right before his eyes.
Dusk is steadily approaching, most of the interior lights are lit, and just as I'm passing by, the entry door opens and out walks Rosalie and Emmett.
Of all the shitty timing.
Edward suggested I go running in his neighborhood, and right now, I wish I took him up on it. If I wasn't so certain I'd get lost, I would have.
I briefly meet Rose's narrowed gaze, but sever it almost immediately, and put my father's rules for people like her into practice. She's not important enough to acknowledge, I tell myself repeatedly, but what I really want to do is smack that smug look right off her face.
I'm as seething as I am out of breath, and after bursting through my front door and slamming it behind me, my phone rings.
"Alice?" I exclaim, bringing it to my ear. "Why are you calling me on your honeymoon?"
"Who hit you?" she bursts down the receiver, sounding her typical screechy, overreacting self.
"Huh?"
"Jay and I are hearing from all over the place that Edward hit you at the wedding. I phoned Ang and she said it wasn't Edward, and that I should ask you, so who was it?"
I groan loudly and with as much frustration, not even bothering to keep it beneath my breath. Rosalie's lies are far-reaching, it seems.
"You can't guess?" I say drolly, peeling my hoodie over my head and tossing it to my kitchen counter.
"Rosalie?"
"Got it in one."
"That fucking—did you see how drunk she got? Lush hoe!"
"I did," I admit ruefully.
"So, what happened?"
"Al..." I complain. "It's not important. "Go back to your husband. We'll talk about it when you get home."
"Not important?" her voice threatens to turn ear-splitting. "Why didn't you tell me?"
"So you wouldn't get like this on your wedding day," I point out dryly.
"Babe, you were right. It wasn't Edward—Rosalie! Fucking bitch!" Alice fills in Jay in the background. "Sorry, Bells. Jay promised me it wasn't Edward, but I was ready to jump on a plane and castrate him."
"Thank you for your concern, but of course, it wasn't Edward." Esme is bad enough, but Alice?
"Well, I didn't think so. Anyway, who's telling everyone it was Ed—Mother fuck!" The penny evidently drops. "What the hell's wrong with her?"
"Other than being unhinged with jealousy? I have no idea."
"Edward has to be furious," she muses.
"To put it mildly. Al, seriously, don't worry about all this. Enjoy your honeymoon."
"I am enjoying it. It's so beautiful here," she gushes, her tone turning wistful. "Where are you?"
"I'm at home, but I have a date to watch The Incredibles with Edward and Addie in thirty, and I still need to jump in the shower, and... oh fuck!"
No, no, no! I took it, didn't I? I'm sure I did.
"What?" Alice queries.
"I forgot to take my damn birth control this morning." I groan again, low and languidly.
It's been one of those days.
"Morning after pill, babe. Anyway, I'm off. Jay and I have a date with the hot tub."
"Have fun—and Al?!"
"I'm still here."
"Don't call me again unless you've lost a leg."
"Yes, Mom. Tell Edward to sock her one for me," she teases before the line goes dead.
Sighing, I can only shake my head at the wonder of her, but first thing's first, I need to get to the drug store for the morning after pill before I forget that as well.
I don't bother showering, or even changing, and after throwing my hoodie back on, I grab my car keys to leave, just as my phone rings again.
"Hey, Bells." Jessica's cheerful voice sounds through the receiver.
"Hey, Jess. What's up?" I ask only moderately curious as I punch the elevator button to head to the underground carpark.
"I just want to run something by you real quick."
"Okay..."
"Edward called earlier. He asked if I could write up a stat dec on what happened last night between you and the blonde lush."
The elevator doors open with a ping; I step inside, and drop my head momentarily to my palm. "I figured he might. God, Jess, it's such a mess."
"I heard she tried to pin it on him—what an absolute bitch."
"To say the least," I mutter.
"So, you don't mind?"
"Why would I?"
"Just checking. Ang has already sent him hers, and I told him I'd be happy to help."
"It shouldn't have come to this, but thanks, Jess."
"No probs, but how the hell did he know about the cap Alice put on her at the bar?"
"Huh?" I say blankly. "I..."
"You okay?"
"Not even remotely, and I missed my damn birth control this morning. I'm heading out to get the morning after pill now before I give the poor man heart failure by getting myself knocked up."
She chuckles. "One missed pill? You'll be fine. You always were a stress-head."
. . .
By the time I return home, Edward and Addie have arrived.
"Bella, it's Daddy and me," Addie's chirpy voice choruses through my intercom as I'm offloading my shoes in the foyer.
"Come on up, Daddy and me," I hit the button and reply, and tearing the pill from its packaging, I shove it in my mouth, swallowing it dry.
No need to upset Handsome Daddy any more than he already is today, I reason.
Not thirty seconds later I open my door to the two of them as Addie propels herself in my arms. "I missed you, Bella!"
"Did you really?" I play along. "I missed you, too. Sorry, I'm running late," I apologize after Edward not-so-subtly eyes the Nike activewear I'm still currently wearing.
"You can shower at my place," he offers, leaning forward to plant his lips to my temple.
I already have a bag packed, and after retrieving it, I allow Addie to pull me back down the stairs to the entrance of my apartment as Edward attempts to mitigate the possibility of more broken bones.
"She's been bouncing off the walls all afternoon," he speaks against my ear after buckling Addie into her booster and opening the front passenger-side door for me.
"I noticed," I say. "She's just over stimulated," I add discreetly once he pulls himself behind the steering wheel. "She'll sleep well tonight."
"I'm counting on it," he replies more or less to himself with a slight smirk ghosting on his lips.
He appears relaxed again, I note with quiet relief because while a murderous-looking Edward is a sight to behold, it makes him even more intimidating than he usually is.
And I haven't run nearly enough to counter it.
Edward stops for pizza, and while Addie and I wait in the car, Addie decides to let herself out of her booster and jump all over the back seat.
"Guess what, Bella?" She pipes up after almost torpedoing herself onto my lap.
"What?" I ask, removing a misplaced elbow from my ribs.
"I'm not going to grandma's tomorrow. I'm staying home with Daddy."
"Are you really?"
"Uh-huh." She nods her head vigorously. "Are you going to stay too?"
"Oh, well... I'm not—"
"Have you seen The Incredibles before?" she promptly changes the subject.
"I haven't."
"Really?"
"Really really."
She giggles. "I saw it a long time ago when I was three."
"A long time ago," I tease her, tugging her still braided hair playfully. "Do your ears hurt?"
"Not too bad.. Daddy's really angry at Uncle Emmett."
"Is he? That's not—"
"And Aunty Rose," she interjects. "And grandma, but not you, Bella. Know what he said?"
"What did he say?" I'm an absolute monster, but I'm more eager to know than I really should be.
"He said—"
"What have I told you?" She's cut off by her father, who opens the back door and dumps two steaming pizza boxes on the seat.
"I didn't mean to get out, Daddy. It unlocked all by itself," Addie says innocently, clumsily scrambling from my arms and plopping herself back into her booster.
"Sure it did," he says dryly, snapping the harness over her shoulders and back in place with a sigh.
"Did you get pepperoni?" Addie asks when Edward pulls away from the curb.
"Yes, I got pepperoni."
"And no pineapple?" she continues her interrogation as I break lightly into laughter.
"No pineapple," Edward assures her with another sigh.
"Daddy likes pineapple on his pizza, Bella. That's yucky!"
"Really?" I put to him when his gaze meets mine, more than surprised.
"You don't?" His brow quirks in reply.
"I do actually, but you're the only other person on the planet I've met who likes it as well. Alice thinks I'm an alien."
His laughter shoots internally from his nose, but he doesn't reply, and I realize I'm already feeling the effects of the post wedding quickie he promised me the night before that still hasn't taken place.
. . .
Dinner is an ordeal. Addie's still so full of energy. In fact, she almost literally bounces from the walls, and steadily on her father's last nerve.
His patience finally severs when, after standing on her seat repeatedly, Addie comes infinitely close to falling off—and taking me with her when I immediately jump up to steady her.
"Sit down and finish your dinner this instant or movie night is off!" Edward snaps, his voice turning hard as Addie gasps and almost jumps out of her skin.
"But—"
"No buts—sit!"
"You're mean, Daddy," Addie grumbles, sitting herself begrudgingly back in her seat with my assistance.
"Sweetie—"
"Keep acting like a brat and you'll see exactly what mean is," Edward cuts me off, scowling at his daughter, his threat not even minimally feigned.
Huffing, Addie decides to call his bluff and push him even further. Picking up her juice box, she slams it back to the table, and inadvertently squeezes it all over the surface and the uneaten pizza still sitting in both boxes.
Edward doesn't hesitate. In an instant he's out of his chair, and before Addie can express the very real remorse overrunning her face, he throws her over his shoulder and heads for the stairs.
"No—I wanna watch the Incredibles!" she hollers, reaching futilely for me. "Bella!"
I can only watch helplessly as Edward carries her from the room without uttering a single word and appearing to ignore Addie's apologies, with a huge sense of déjà vu. More than once, I pushed my father the same way, and his reaction was nearly identical. I got hauled to my bedroom over his shoulder kicking and screaming.
Doors slam and Addie's loudly-expressed protests don't appear to be abating. I have no idea what's going on up there, but it's enough for her to suddenly stop and scream so high pitched it's practically ear splitting even from where I am a story below.
"That's ENOUGH!" Edward roars in response behind one final slammed door. "You're behaving like your mother!"
"I HATE YOU, DADDY!" is Addie's immediate response.
"Yeah, well the feeling's mutual!"
When he steps back in the room, not only is that murderous expression ingrained back into his face, but along with it is a very evident frustration.
Meeting my gaze for only a few seconds, he lowers his head and runs a very rigid set of fingers through his hair to the back of his neck.
"I know," I attempt to reassure him. "She's just over-stimu—"
A bitter laugh erupts from him, effectively cutting me off, before he curls his arm around my waist and draws me against his chest. "I'm sorry..." He expels a short, impatient breath. "It's been one of those days."
"It has," I agree with a good degree of delicacy. "She's five..."
"Were you the same?" he murmurs in question against the top of my head.
"Exactly the same. Being that over stimulated makes you incredibly restless. And it's very frustrating." I don't think there'll ever be a time when it won't be, but at least as a child, tantrums were an outlet to release it.
Running only just keeps it at bay.
"Remind me again that I won't have to medicate her." He sighs, sounding so weary something snaps within me, and stretching on my toes I wrap both arms around his neck.
"You won't have to medicate her."
His face momentarily warms and he comes infinitely close to smiling. "What would I do without you?"
I open my mouth to answer when his lips merge with mine. It's only brief though, before he returns to his state of brooding.
Without another word he begins to clear away the table with the frown heavily etched into his brow. I help, and in silence we stack the dishwasher with both our thoughts elsewhere.
"Will... you go up and talk to her?" he asks after a moment, breaking the awkwardness and sounding as uncertain as his clear green eyes are suddenly reflecting.
I hate being forced to witness this side of him as much as I hated seeing it from Charlie, and Edward has a vulnerability that runs deep.
"Sure."
I turn to leave when he suddenly takes my hand and turns me back to face him. "She's-she's not like her mother," he stammers, his eyes downcast. "I said that in anger."
"I know, and of course, she isn't. She's just like you," I say lightly, prodding him teasingly in the chest with my index finger. "Exactly like you."
Looking up, he sets his gaze on mine, his expression unfathomable, and I know the word he's about to say before it passes his lips.
"Bella."
. . .
I find Addie on her bedroom floor curled up on all fours, her face buried in her folded arms and her butt in the air, shuddering uncontrollably.
"Hey..." I say soothingly, kneeling beside her and placing my palm to her back.
She lifts her head up, revealing her hopelessly puffy eyes and tear-streaked cheeks, and my heart comes close to breaking for her. It's not humanly possible not to love this little girl as much as I do her father.
"Bella..." she sobs, her voice hoarse, before pulling herself clumsily into my lap. "I'm sorry."
"It's okay," I promise her, enclosing her in my arms and rocking her gently back and forth.
"Is Daddy really angry at me?" she asks timidly after several moments where her tears begin to subside.
"No... He's not really angry. What's going on, sweetie? You're not normally like this."
"My-my ears hurt a little bit," she confesses, "but Daddy only has the yucky medicine left."
"We can get you some more," I suggest, pressing my lips quickly to her damp temple.
"Can we?" she puts to me, pulling back to meet my eyes, her tone adorably hopeful.
"'Course we can."
"O-okay," she hiccups, nodding her head to further reiterate it.
"Shall we ask Daddy?" I say, wiping her face dry with the back of my fingers and helping her to her feet.
"Uh-huh." Nodding a second time, she bites on the inside of her cheek in a display of concern; a mannerism her father does entirely too often.
Taking her hand, I lead her back down stairs, and after a quick search, we locate Edward in his study. This is when Addie hides herself meekly behind me.
"Well," Edward begins, pulling himself up from behind his desk and folding his arms across his chest, "what do you have to say for yourself?" Despite how intimidating he's capable of being, his anger is almost completely feigned; if the tone of his voice isn't evident of it, the smile ghosting on his lips is.
This man really is a lost cause when it comes to his daughter, and I can't fault him for it at all.
It's sexier than sin.
"I'm sorry, Daddy," Addie declares, breaking into fresh tears.
Edward immediately takes her into his arms, and wrapping hers tightly around his neck, Addie buries her face against him and sobs. That's when I witness firsthand the lengths of how he cheers his little girl up.
Propping her back to her feet, he kneels before her, smooshes her lips together and smacks his to them loudly. "Ten thousand years will give you such a crick in the neck." He pulls off a near perfect imitation of Robin Williams that not only brings Addie's laughter to the surface, but mine as well. "So, what are we gonna do, Tiger?"
"Umm..." Tilting her head to the side, Addie places her finger to her chin. "Watch The Incredibles with Bella and have ice cream?"
Groaning comically, he hoists her in his arms again and swings her upside down. "Come on then, but bath first."
"Nooo, not a bath!" Addie attempts to articulate over her giggles as Edward heads for the second floor, grabbing my hand and tugging me behind him as he does.
. . .
Addie doesn't make ten minutes into the movie. She promptly falls asleep wedged between me and her father with her thumb dangling from her mouth.
Edward gives it a further few minutes before he moves her, and after helping him tuck her into bed, we retreat back to the kitchen where he makes us coffee.
He's turned quiet again, and what's obvious is behind his incredibly astute eyes, his mind's drifting. It suddenly occurs to me his frown has never been indicative of his mood, but how deeply introspective he is.
After stirring two sugars into a mug, he slides it across the granite counter toward me with a quick grin. "How was your run?"
"Hm? Oh, it was okay," I reply, my brow quirked because that was not the question I expected him to ask.
I don't mention the fact I saw his brother and Rosalie, and he doesn't enquire further. Instead, he brings his own mug to his lips and takes a large gulp, his eyes fixed to the floor and his thoughts clearly beyond the both of us.
I watch him standing alone on the other side of the island bench wondering how the hell he can tolerate the heat on top of what he's thinking.
The latter he elaborates on a moment later.
"I've never had a woman defend me the way you did this morning, Bella." He appears to muse, speaking it more to himself than to me. I glance over to him as he scoffs and breaks into a very fleeting grin; it's the distraction I need though because his admission has stumped me. "I honestly thought you were going to jump my mother."
Returning his smile sheepishly, I sever his gaze to my untouched coffee and shake my head. "I just... I couldn't understand how..." With a sigh, I let it go, chewing on my bottom lip as my thoughts race troubled ahead of me.
I will never understand it. Her own son.
"She—my wife I mean—used to injure herself—her face usually," Edward discloses after the longest pause where we both drank our coffee in as much silence as preoccupation, and while I was half expecting it, I still struggle to hold back my reaction. "Then she'd visit my mother and remark on how clumsy she was—how she tripped on the stairs or knocked her head against the car door. Things a woman who was clearly being abused would offer up in explanation."
"Jesus," I mutter, swallowing back the expletives I really want to put into words. Fucking bitch is the least of it. "And your mother—"
"She didn't want to believe it, but I knew she did. Even after everything came out, I still think a part of her believed it."
"But—"
"Bella," he says behind a jaded breath, flattening his palms to the counter top and staring down at them, "when a woman turns up with bruises, who's the world going to believe? Her, or the man who claims she did it to herself?"
"How did it come out?" I ask tactfully, needing to know more, but hating that I'm prying further. He won't meet my gaze and his entire frame is tense; he's clearly uncomfortable delving into this.
"I recorded her. I was seeing a divorce lawyer by that point, and it was his suggestion."
"Jesus, Edward..." It's all I can really think to say without going on a rant about how glad I am his wife is dead. "And she injured herself to get your family off side?"
"She did it as punishment," he clarifies. "If she decided I did something she didn't like, well..."
"Did what? —breathe?" I blurt with a tad too much passion but I cannot conceive that any woman could mistreat a man like Edward.
He breaks into an impulsive smile, but it's so overrun that the sentiment falls short.
"I'm sorry," I quickly apologize.
"Why are you sorry?"
I shake my head, but I can't center my thoughts to properly express them. "All I know is if she wasn't dead, I would jump her," I go with as Edward laughs, once, shortly and full of emotional charge. "And you showed your family the tapes," I coax him to continue.
I want this behind us so I can jump him.
"I did," he replies, scoffing almost ironically to himself. "She completely lost it, and the next night I came home from work and found her in bed with another man, claiming he was the baby's father. That's when I walked out and filed for divorce."
"Oh my god," I utter, sighing with it heavily. It's the only response at my disposal right now.
"I thought—very seriously—about killing her," he adds so casually after a moment, I almost choke on my own saliva. "I told my mother, and I think that's why she thought I had it in me." I'm guessing my expression is explanation enough, because he quickly continues. "I didn't see a way out. For me or the baby. She would have held Addie over me, and god knows what she would have done to her. I ... couldn't let that happen," he murmurs the last part to himself, his gaze breaking from mine again with what is definitely a frown in every sense of the word.
"Of course, you couldn't." I can feel myself becoming choked, and hastily clear it from my throat. He doesn't want my pity. He was very clear about that, but the thought of that repulsive woman hurting not only Edward but sweet little Addie makes me feel absolutely homicidal myself. "Edward... she was the devil."
He laughs again awkwardly, and edged with it is the rawness still flooding his expression. "She was the devil, alright." Walking around the island toward me, he takes the mug from my hand, places it to the counter, and then hoists me right alongside it. "I don't want you to worry about Rosalie. I've taken care of it," he changes the topic from one horrid woman to the other, but I quickly learned, that's Edward.
When he's done with something, he's done.
"I heard," I reply ruefully, planting both my hands to his shoulders.
Even with the advantage of where I'm sitting, he's still taller.
"You did?" His brows shoot up in question.
"I did. Jess rang me."
Taking a measured breath, he releases it into a hum and subtly angles his body to mine. "She was very cooperative."
"Cooperative is an interesting adjective to use."
He chuckles, his voice whisky smooth and deep, and I realize the kinetics within him have already shifted. "You still surprise the hell out of me, Bella."
"I...do...?" I say, my attention almost immediately diverted as he runs his nose and lips along my throat, leaving a trail of fire in their wake.
"Hmm... Here and then in bed. I was losing you there for a while," he says gruffly, and before I can ask his meaning, he cups my face in his hands and kisses me. "You're salty..."
"Oh god...let me shower... first," I plead weakly against his lips, but I'm already too far down and can barely anchor my thoughts on anything but his hands, his mouth; his day-old stubble dragging across my flesh...
Half-naked sex on the kitchen counter is definitely a first for us, but the sound of the two of us echoing from the tiles becomes so loud I half expect Addie to walk in on us. I can't quite let myself fully go, so it's just as well he's promising me an encore later tonight.
Still, his endurance is definitely improving, and he absolutely shreds me like he always does; leaving me splitting at the seams, a quaking, gasping mess as I half choke on the eruption spilling from me lest it reaches a pair of little ears.
My coffee mug ends up as collateral damage, shattering to the floor, and along with it my iPod as it falls from the pocket of my hoodie. I catch the very distinct sound of the screen shattering and groan, half smothered against Edward's very sultry-damp chest.
"That wasn't your phone, was it?" he struggles to speak over his own bated breath.
"Not quite. My iPod." They're practically antiquated anyway, and Alice is always telling me to stop getting attached to inanimate objects, and to use my phone.
"I'll buy you another one," he promises, planting his lips to my jaw and continuing to engulf me in the heated warmth of his breath.
The spark he ignited within me has yet to dim, and he's trembling as much as I am.
"Apple no longer make them," I utter out, letting my head flop to his shoulder in exhaustion. "Oh god, Edward, you have to let me sleep tonight."
How he functions on the amount of sleep he gets, I'll never understand, but sleep deprivation only exacerbates my already overactive mind, and I know first-hand the kind of trouble it can get me into. Especially in my field of work.
"I'll let you sleep," he assures me before pulling back to kiss my lips tenderly. "For a little while," he tacks on as a devilish grin overtakes his expression.
"You're absolutely trying to kill me," I say, flooding with affection for him, and then imitating him from earlier tonight, I squeeze his cheeks together and kiss his puckered lips. "MWAH."
"Bella..." He chuckles huskily and the sound of it is absolute porn.
"If she was still alive," I lean in and whisper against his earlobe, having to stop myself from biting down on it, "I'd one hundred percent hatch a plan with you to off her. I'm a cop's daughter, don't forget." Leaning back, I wink, just as Edward bursts into laughter.
"And how would you do that?" he plays along, as he tucks my hair behind my ears and then himself behind the fly of his jeans.
"My father had connections with the Quileute tribe," I explain, helping him button up his shirt. "They could easily make someone disappear."
"Could they?" He's humoring me now, or perhaps he's challenging me. My mind's in complete chaos, and all I can conceive of is him making it a whole lot more chaotic.
"They could, now help me down, you brute. I've had my iPod since I was in college."
He does, setting me gingerly on the floor as he side-steps the broken pieces of ceramic. Then bending down, he retrieves my very shattered iPod as well as the packaging from the morning after pill. I'd stuffed it in my pocket along with my iPod earlier, and right now I want to kick myself.
"What's this?" he enquires curiously.
"Oh uh, the emergency pill," I mumble, taking it from him a little too hastily and giving myself away. "I forgot to take mine this morning. With everything..."
He gazes at me intently for a very uncomfortable few seconds, the frown steadily returning to his handsome face, and just as he opens his mouth to reply, he's interrupted by a very tearful Addie announcing her arrival.
"Daddy," she cries in open panic, "I frew up!"
A/N: put your hands up if you've ever had a delicate moment interrupted by pukey kids.