I do not own Twilight, only the plot contained herein. Any and all complaints will be forwarded directly to my self-esteem.

THIS CHAPTER SWAN-DIVES HEAD-FIRST INTO LEMONS LATER IN THE CHAPTER. AGAIN, YOU MAY SKIP THE AREAS BETWEEN THE Xs, IF YOU'RE NOT FOND OF LEMONS.

I heard an unfamiliar engine pulling in the driveway and hit the call button. Esme answered via a speaker unit in the alcove under the stairs.

"This is the Cullen residence, can I help you?"

"Uh, this is Charles Swan, they're expecting me today."

"Oh yes Charlie, please, drive up." She said, and buzzed the gate open.

I sat on the sofa upstairs with a bottle of visine in hand. I'd never had to feign crying before, but Charlie was an officer, and knew how to spot true remorse. Alice assured us that the venom in our eyes would push the visine out a few moments after we placed them in. She said it would aid in his own acceptance to see others who knew her, grieving as well. We all wore long sleeves today to hide it. I fidgeted with the bottle while I waited for him to enter the house, his footsteps were slower than I remember. Soon I heard him knock and clear his throat before the front door opened.

"Charlie. Welcome." I heard my father say before they shook hands.

"Carlisle, Esme, thank you for having me at such short notice."

Esme embraced him, "Of course Charlie, we've been worried sick. Please come in. Would you like some coffee?"

"Ah, sure, that would be nice."

"I'll be right back. Why don't you bring him into the great room sweetheart, and I'll be along in a moment." Ah. Our Bella left it set up for me. She thought, I do hope she's alright.

As did I, but I convinced myself to have faith that the others were keeping her safe and distracted.

Alice was sitting by a window, gazing into the distance, seemingly distracted by the disappearance of her dearest friend. "Charlie," she said with a watery smile, before getting up and embracing him as well. A handkerchief covered the visine in her hand. "What news do you have? What did the Officers say in Iowa?"

He hugged my sister, patting her back, then stepped away and looked at his shoes, "I'm afraid it's not good, Alice," he said with a shaky breath, "let's wait for your mom to join us and I'll explain. And then I have some questions for you, if you don't mind."

"I'll tell you anything," she said, worryingly.

Esme returned with 3 coffees and a few sandwiches. She set the tray on the table in the center of the sofa group, before Charlie continued.

"It looks like Bella was driving the backroads through Iowa when the meteorite storm hit the US. There are craters all over the US, some are small and some are huge. Lots of people…" he paused for a breath, "lots of people went missing, or are presumed dead."

"But Bella's truck was found without her in it, she could be out there, right?" Alice sounded frantic and in denial about what Charlie was leading up to. She dabbed her eyes, placing the drops while he was distracted in delivering the horrid news.

Charlie himself shook his head, fighting the lump in his throat. He put his hand on her arm and gently said, "No, hun."

"But maybe she escaped! Maybe she got help, or hitchhiked! She's got to be out there!"

"Honey, Bella's truck was burned."

All 3 of them feigned shock. Gasping breath, jaws dropped, a palm to a silent heart.

"The way the truck looked," He looked to Alice and fought his own tears as Alice's eyes started to leak, "I've seen enough accidents in my time as a cop to know there isn't much hope." His voice broke at the end, and we all felt his pain.

From across the house, I felt Jasper send him a feeling of acceptance through his thick walls of grief.

Alice collapsed into Esme's arms. Esme wiped at her own eyes and stealthily placed a few drops of visine, a few seconds later she was crying as well. "We were finally going to be reunited!" Alice raised her voice in frustration. "This is all my fault! If I hadn't insisted…" She broke down again in the crook of Esme's arms and placed a few more drops in her eyes.

"Insisted on what Alice?" Charlie asked, in a more professional sounding voice.

"I insisted Edward call her after we heard of the asteroid, from Carlisle's friend."

"I have a friend who is an astronomer," Carlisle explained, looking off to the side, seemingly distracted by this sudden news, "he has colleagues who are involved with NASA. We heard through the grapevine about the asteroid two days before the story broke on the news."

"Edward has been distraught without Bella. He never thought he was good enough for her," Esme explained, voice cracking, "after the way she left for Phoenix last year. He thought he was letting her go when we moved here, and that she was better off."

"I convinced him to call her when we found out, I told him he had to try." Alice sobbed, wringing her handkerchief between her hands.

Charlie thought about that for a moment before he asked, "So Edward called the house. Are you the one who called her cellphone?"

"Yes, Edward was stuck in traffic in Ohio. He had talked to her the day she left. He was so excited." She sniffed. "He left at almost the same time she did. They planned to meet in Illinois, but the few times he tried calling her, her cell was turned off because she had no way to charge it in her truck. He was supposed to keep his on so she could call him when she took breaks. His cell was almost dead and he was trying to get off the road to buy a new charging cable when he called me and asked me to keep trying her." She sniffed, "When I talked to her she said there was a lot of weird looking hail, and that she was going to find cover and call me back."

"I see." Charlie looked defeated. "That explains why her phone was off and untraceable. I think it's safe to assume you're the last person who spoke to her," He picked up his coffee cup and took a long sip, letting the warmth soothe his throat. "She was in the plains, mostly farmland. Not much cover out that way. I think it's time to start believing that she's gone." He nodded to himself and his chin began to tremble slightly.

The only sound from the four of them for the next few moments were sounds of their hushed crying. While they were quiet Jasper thought, "His emotions are stable, Edward. He's accepting that he's lost Her. I don't feel any hostility for the time being."

"Thank you." I said quietly.

Charlie took a deep breath then, rubbing his hands on his knees, "Where is Edward? Would you mind if I speak to him?"

"He's in his room, he arrived home yesterday." Carlisle explained gently, "He had been waiting for her in Illinois since Wednesday evening. He refused to leave until we informed him of what you told Alice. Follow me Charlie."

"I'll bring him, Carlisle." Alice spoke up.

Carlisle looked like he considered it for a moment, then acquiesced, kissing her forehead as she passed.

"His room is at the top of the stairs. When he got home I told him what I knew. It wasn't good. He locked himself in his room and just, lost it. He unlocked the door only for Esme, and when I brought him something to eat this morning. He won't tell me what he's thinking, maybe he'll tell you." She rapped lightly on my door and turned the handle. "Edward? Charlie's here. He wants to speak to you, ok?" She turned back to Charlie, hugged him and whispered, "I'm so sorry Charlie," before walking down the hall and closing her own door behind her. Jasper was there to comfort her as she cried her tearless sobs.

Charlie blew out a breath and then entered the room. He looked around at the destruction he assumed was in response to my anguish. Books scattered the floor and several shelves had been ripped from the walls. The desk and its contents had been overturned, the laptop was facedown. The curtains that covered most of one wall were torn and hanging haphazardly, fluttering in the wind from the partially open french door. The sheets on the bed had been ripped apart and the mattress was askew. The blanket covered my shoulders as I sat up on the couch. My hair, in its usual disarray, looked appropriate for once. I wore the wrinkled bed clothes from last night. Dishes dotted the floor around my bare feet.

I waited for him to take it all in before I spoke. "She's gone isn't she." He didn't answer. "You're here because she's gone. I waited, but she never came." My voice broke and I pinched my eyes. I looked up at him and said, "This is the part where the cop comes to deliver the news, isn't it?" My eyes began to drip, and Charlie's face fell. From his mind I saw myself looking frustrated and half-cocked. I couldn't meet his eyes. I turned my face away from his and shook my head in disbelief. "I wanted to meet her halfway, in Nebraska, and she refused. We looked at the travel forecast and the East coast was so congested, she insisted she wanted to keep going so we could be together faster. She's so damn stubborn." I wet my eyes and quietly corrected myself, "Was."

With that word I began to sob in earnest at the mere thought of losing her. I grabbed fistfulls of my hair while my heart squeezed in on itself. "GOD DAMN IT!" I yelled in frustration and pain. I kicked the dishes and a plate shattered. The agony of what might have happened, had I missed saving her by even a second, hit me like a battering ram. I pulled my knees up to my chest and agonized. "I want her here! I want her safe!" I put my head down and cried for what may have happened.

Charlie's thoughts wavered between laying into me, and empathizing. He desperately wanted someone to blame, to take his anger out on, and I was the obvious choice. He thought of telling me it was my fault, but knew it was untrue. Thankfully Jasper caught his hesitation amid Alice's regret in the next room, and helped him choose a healthier course. I pinched my eyes and felt the couch dip next to me. His hand squeezed my shoulder, "I know son. I want her back," his voice broke and he let out a sorrowful breath.

"I know I was never good enough for her," I said to appease his anger, "she was so out of my league. But she was everything to me. I love her so much." Alice's faux tears rolled down my face but they could have been real for the agony I felt. Everything I said was the truth. My chest ripped open once again.

"She was a great kid." He agreed, then paused, contemplating, "I'm not sure she ever understood how much pride I had in her, beyond being my kid. She was just good." He paused to take a breath, "Being her dad was the best thing I ever did."

"She told me that moving in with you was the best decision she ever made." I said, attempting to calm myself, knowing Bella would appreciate saying these words for her. "She said that a lot. She said you were so easy to live with, and she wished she'd done it sooner. She loved being your daughter. She loved you, Charlie." I wasn't sure how much more I could handle of this act we needed to put on for Charlie. I wrapped my arms around myself and wiped my eyes again.

"I was glad to have her. This last year was the happiest I remember being." He nodded, took a deep breath, and said, "She loved you the whole time ya know. She never stopped. She was a mess without you." He paused, steeling himself, before he said "She won't feel any pain anymore. No more nightmares."

I saw flashes of her in his mind; rousing almost every night from a terrible dream state, to a terrible reality. In her waking hours she was withdrawn, contemplative, always working hard to stay busy. Everything she did was meticulous after I left. Whether it was on school work, house cleaning, or dinner preparations, being idle was unacceptable. Charlie knew she longed for my company. I did those things to her. I caused her that agony.

Charlie interrupted my thoughts by saying, "We both need time, but there will be a memorial service in Forks. I imagine she'd want you there."

"Ok, Charlie." I said quietly.

"I'll call in a few weeks." He said before he left, shutting the door behind him.

I audibly locked it after he left, and melted to the floor, the ache in my chest was too real. The anguish I caused her, the terrible fear of nearly losing her, the agony of needing her more than ever caused my chest to cave in. My now tearless cries echoed down the hall.

Downstairs, he could hear me from the foyer. He walked back toward the greatroom to find Esme tucked under Carlisle's arm. I heard him say, "I know all I need to know. I'll, ah, let you know when her services will be."

"I'm so very sorry, Charlie. Esme and I love her dearly."

"Yeah. She was one of a kind. Thank you." His footsteps crossed the threshold of our home and he was gone.

It could have been minutes or hours after his car hit the pavement beyond the gate, I heard a tap at my door. My cries quieted, but I could do nought but weep. It wasn't until I heard her voice, "Edward, can you open the door?" that my soul's ache began to ease. I flipped the lock, cradled her to my chest and slammed the door shut behind us again. My agony began to subside with the feel of her heartbeat against my chest, the softness of her hair under my hand and against my cheek. I took in lungfuls of her scent. She let me cling to her like a drowning man needs his next breath, all the while shushing my gulps for air, and whispering "I'm here, it's ok."

Esme sent up sandwiches and dessert for her dinner, leaving them on the hall table outside the room before they all left; knowing that we needed some time to be truly alone. I let her lead me to the sofa, and she climbed into my lap, stroking my face, and whispering words of love. Eventually, I was able to tell her that I could never speak of the possibility of her death again. That as soon as she was healthy I would change her without a fuss. I couldn't imagine an eternity without her.

xxxxxxxxxxxxx

She took my hand in hers and kissed my palm before placing it against her cheek. Then she kissed my lips before hugging herself to me. She kissed my neck, my jaw, before bringing my mouth to hers again. I clutched her to me as I met her lips. I needed her terribly, she was essential to my existence in ways that I may never understand, but I felt it deep within my stone flesh. I peeled off her clothing and worshiped the skin of her neck and her chest with my lips. My tongue pulled the peaks of her breasts into my mouth amid her shuddering breaths. She pulled my own shirt over my head and pressed her comforting warmth against me. She wrapped her legs around my waist as I stood and carried her toward the bed. I kicked the mattress back into place before my hands trailed down her hips, over her backside and squeezed her ever closer. All the while her tongue gilded against mine, matching my passion for her. I allowed space between us only when she required it to work the drawstring of my pants, and I, the fastenings of hers. She pushed my clothing down, and my hardness bounced back up between us. I backed her to the bed and her knees buckled, I wrapped my arm around her waist, refusing to break our kiss. I dragged my hands up her back, to the sides of her breasts, down her stomach and over her hips to remove the last tiny scrap of clothing separating her body from mine. I couldn't stop myself from caressing my hand back up her smooth skin. One hand cradled her neck, the other found the apex of her thighs. She was slick and warm and irresistible. She moaned and pushed herself into my fingers. I quickly moved her to the center of the bed and pressed my erection against her core. She moaned again in response while she kissed my shoulder, my neck, any place she could place her lips. It was heaven to feel her hot mouth on me. She rolled her hips up to press herself closer. Her hands on my stomach, she caressed down to my hips and lifted her own hips again. I placed my mouth between her breasts, kissed her pulsing heartbeat in reverence, then centered the tip of my erection at her entrance. Her hooded eyes met mine, pleading. Slowly I entered her silky heat, before pulling back and entering again and again, slowly, savoring her tight warmth. Until I met resistance. I took a deep breath and held it, waiting for her permission. At her nod, and pleading, I pushed past and held. Her tiny gasping breaths lasted only a short while before she relaxed and began to urge me to move within her.

"Edward, I love you, I love you…"

"My Bella, my love, my everything," was my prayer and promise.

My forehead met hers, and we shared the same breath in ecstasy. Such beautiful torture, I could never have imagined. I followed her lead, meeting her pull for pull and press for press, watching all the while as she lost herself in me. I was spurred on by this breathtaking insanity, and when I thought I could resist her no longer, her body began to tense, my hardness was surrounded by exquisite pressure, her back arched and the sound of sensuality erupted from her throat. Her inner walls pulled me in harder, and I finally found glory in the pleasure of her body. My dead heart ached in reverence, disbelief, gratitude as I savored this single most magnificent experience of my existence. I shared my breath with her, coming down from the height of the stars. I could not believe that this perfect creature was meant for me. Our movements slowed, and I held her close as we returned to earth.

She looked at me in disbelief, still breathing heavily, and whispered, "I didn't know… it would be so wonderful," and a tear slid from the corner of her eye.

"Nor I," I admitted. I stroked a lock of her hair away from her face, and then the tear. "My Bella." My words were inadequate.

We held each other, whispering sweet language, until she became cold, and then we ran a warm bath. There, our smiles returned as she washed my hair, and I hers. We dressed in robes from our closet, then righted the room together at a human pace. We cuddled under the covers. I told her of the message from her I gave to Charlie, and his answer. She was sad, but grateful. She satisfied her human hunger with the food from Esme, and made love once more before she found her rest for the night. I laid there in the dark, holding her body to me, breathing her in, knowing what an incredibly blessed man I have become. My old life was over, I'd never be the same.

Jeezis that was an emotional roller-coaster. It seems that Edward was holding a lot of emotions inside since the moment he saved her from the crashing truck. They think faster and feel harder, and therefore he must have gone through a myriad of emotions from the time he grabbed her, to the time he was fretting over her in the trees.

I know you don't give af why I haven't posted in so long, and I won't bore you with the details. This chapter's been sitting on a file on my laptop for months; it was very selfish of me to keep it from you. I hope you'll forgive me and review it. I have a few more I could post. I don't want to bother with it if no one's reading it, so please, let me know you're out there.