AN: Thanks for all the reviews guys, you rock ;-) I guess RockerWolfPup is mostly responsible for me deciding to carry on with this story so this chapter is for you, dude!
Chapter 2: Slayer Healing Broken?
Int: Sunnydale General Hospital ICU
"Buffy...BUFFY!" Dawn stood beside her sister, trying to wake her from her sleep. She became a bit more insistent when the blonde didn't respond, shaking her a little harder until finally Buffy opened her eyes. Dawn felt bad for waking her, she looked so exhausted, but it had to be done.
"Wha…who…" her gaze followed the hand on her shoulder until she was staring into her sisters eyes, "Hey, Dawnie." Buffy smiled, stifling a yawn with her hand.
Dawn tilted her head in the direction of the bed next to which Buffy sat, keeping her desperate vigil, "How is she?" the younger Summer's asked, concern etched in her expression. Buffy followed her gaze to the beaten, broken figure lying in the bed, countless tubes and wires attached to various parts of her damaged body.
Buffy let out a frustrated sigh, "No change." She said softly, her wavering voice betraying her emotions.
Flashback:
"Giles, she stopped breathing!" the panic was evident in Buffy's voice as she held her fingers to Faith's neck, feeling for a pulse.
"We're nearly there." Giles responded, grim determination in his voice as he floored it, heading for Sunnydale General Hospital.
Relief filled Buffy when she felt Faith's pulse, it was weak and thready, but it was there.
"She has a pulse." She said, placing Faith's head in her lap so she could try and give her mouth-to-mouth. She blew twice, watching Faith's chest rise and fall with each breath.
"Please god, don't leave me now." She said, listening to see if Faith was breathing yet. Nothing! Buffy breathed again for the dark Slayer, desperation in the act. "Come on Faith." She pleaded, tears streaming down her face.
She was about to breathe for Faith again when the Slayer suddenly started coughing and gasping in breathes of precious air.
"Oh thank god." Buffy held Faith to her chest, relief filling her being.
"Geez B." Faith coughed, "If you wanted to kiss me…" …cough… her voice was raspy but Buffy could still detect the typical sarcasm in it, "Just had to ask"…cough.
Buffy smiled, "Hey." She said, staring into the other Slayer's brown eyes, "You gave us all a scare." She said, smiling at Faith.
Faith enjoyed the feel of being in Buffy's embrace, she felt safe in the blonde Slayer's arms; she smiled weakly at the blonde, "Ya know me"…cough…"living on the edge…" her eyes started to flutter, she tried to keep her focus on the hazel eyes but her eyelids were just too heavy. She could hear Buffy pleading with her to stay awake, her voice sounded so far away. She wanted to comply, but it was just too difficult so she succumbed to oblivion, falling unconscious once again.
End Flashback:
Int: Sunnydale General Hospital ICU
"Buffy."
Buffy turned her attention back to her sister, "Did you need me for something?" she inquired, suddenly remembering that Dawn had been trying to rouse her.
"You spaced out for a while there…" Dawn said, concerned, "You alright?"
Buffy sighed deeply, "Yeah, sorry, I was just thinking." She turned back to Dawn, "What's up?" she asked, trying to sound a bit more cheery.
"Giles and Willow are leaving for England soon…I thought you might like to go and say goodbye." Dawn said, shrugging her shoulders slightly, "Only if you want to." She quickly added.
Buffy stole a glance at Faith, a lump rose in her throat but she quickly turned back to her sister and smiled, "Yeah, thanks, I do want to say goodbye." she said wearily, running a hand through her hair as she blew out a breath.
"How is Willow?" Buffy asked, slowly getting to her feet and stretching all the kinks out of her muscles.
"She still won't talk to anyone…she just sits in her bed staring at the wall." Dawn replied, concern in her voice.
Buffy shook her head and looked at the floor, "I hope the coven in England can help her." She said softly, her voice tinged with sadness and regret. She looked up and Dawn could see the tears welling in her sister's eyes, threatening to spill down her cheeks. Dawn took a step towards Buffy and grabbed her in a big hug, "It'll be ok, it has to be." She said, holding Buffy for while.
"I'm ok." Buffy pulled out of Dawn's bone crushing hug and gently replaced a stray lock of hair behind her sister's ear, "Thanks." She smiled at Dawn and then headed out the door.
"I'll stay with Faith." Dawn called after her sister's retreating form. She turned to the bed and watched the slow rise and fall of the injured Slayer's chest, "She's too stubborn to cry; well, cry properly." She raised an eyebrow at the dark Slayer, "You know what I mean!" She said conversationally, taking a seat in the chair next to the bed, "She's bottling it all in…it's not healthy."
Dawn sighed as she took in the other Slayer's appearance, "You look like shit, ya know." She said, fiddling with a loose thread in the blanket that was covering Faith. Dawn was deep in thought, pondering what to say next; she felt she had to say something; it was too quiet, except for the monotonous beep of the ECG. She looked at Faith's bruised face; she looked so innocent, so young when she was sleeping, "It's hard to believe what you're…" Dawn stopped herself, "What you were once capable of." She said softly.
She paused and took a breath, "You've changed; I could tell the moment you removed your helmet…" Dawn stopped, thinking back to how they were running for their lives only a few days ago, it seemed so surreal, "I…" she didn't quiet know what to say, she looked up, her expression serious, "Thank you." She said softly, "For saving us all…for saving Willow….for saving Buffy."
She sighed and leant back in the chair, content to just sit and watch the ECG trace as it ran, a comforting reminder that Faith's heart was still beating.
"They're about to leave." Buffy's voice startled Dawn out of her thoughts. Dawn jumped a little as she turned to acknowledge her sister. "Thanks, I'll see you later." she said, getting up and kissing Buffy as she made to leave.
"Thanks for staying with her." Buffy said, nodding towards Faith.
"Not a problem, we had a good chat." Dawn said, trying to lighten the somber mood.
Buffy just smiled sadly at her sister as she watched her leave.
She turned to Faith and sat down beside her once again, gently taking the dark Slayer's broken hand in her own. Buffy watched her sleep but it wasn't long before exhaustion again took hold of her and she slipped into a deep sleep.
Slayer dream:
The wind was blowing gently through the tall grass; it rippled as it flowed in time to the breeze. Faith was slowly walking through the field, running her fingers over the tips of grass as she walked. Her face was raised to the sky, drinking in the warm sunlight, smelling the fresh aroma of nature.
A flock of birds suddenly took flight, startled by a predator. Faith stopped and looked in the direction of the disturbance, trying to make out what caused it. Suddenly a vampire jumped out of the tall grass and attacked the Slayer. She was taken by surprise which allowed him to land the first blow; an effective side kick to the chest that landed her on her butt a few feet away.
"Right, that's it…" Faith sprang to her feet, and charged the vamp. She threw a lethal 3 punch combination and followed it up with a devastating front kick to his midsection. He went down hard.
"This is MY dream." Before he knew what was happening Faith was upon him, plunging her stake into his heart with deadly accuracy. He turned to dust and she watched his remains blow away across the field. She got up and dusted her hands off, wiping them on her jeans.
"Do you always fight vampires in your dreams?"
Faith started and turned to face the owner of the voice, "Hey B." she said, her characteristic grin showing off her dimples. She spared a glance over her shoulder to where the vampire was dusted, "He was ruining my perfect day." She said smirking as she once again gazed into the sky, soaking up the suns rays. 'Now it really is perfect', she thought, smiling to herself.
"Yeah, he definitely didn't belong here." Buffy agreed, her arms folded across her chest as she watched her sister Slayer, "Way too sunny for his complexion."
Faith chuckled at that and lowered her gaze, slightly tilting her head as she took in Buffy's appearance; "Speaking of not belonging…" she left the statement open, looking curiously at the blonde slayer.
Buffy walked up to Faith; she stopped right in front of the taller slayer and gazed up into her eyes. She slowly reached out her hand and gently grasped Faith's. They both felt it, the familiar tingle, it was comforting. Buffy could sense the uncertainty in Faith, the tension in her stance; her whole demeanor had changed when Buffy invaded her personal space. Gone was the sarcastic, care free attitude…it was now replaced with what Buffy was certain was the real Faith. The confident façade she always hid behind had disappeared. Now there was just a vulnerable person standing before her, needing to be loved and accepted.
"I was worried about you." Buffy said, gently giving Faith's hand a reassuring squeeze. She could tell that Faith was slowly relaxing in the closeness of her presence. Faith opened her mouth to retort when she frowned suddenly, her expression one of confusion, pain, and hurt. Buffy could feel the sadness and pain flowing off Faith in waves. She noticed the beautiful, sunny day had turned dark with stormy, ominous clouds rolling in. She took a step back, taking her hand out of Faiths, noticing her hands were covered in blood; she looked at them in disbelief. She saw Faith looking down so she followed her gaze and stopped, staring in horror at the knife embedded deep in her abdomen. The dark slayer lifted her eyes to meet Buffy's; the sadness in her gaze broke Buffy's heart.
"Oh god, Faith," Buffy said, reaching out to the other Slayer, not knowing what else to do.
"This knife will always come between us, B." Faith said, her voice tinged with sadness and resignation.
"It doesn't have to…" Buffy was starting to cry, desperate to help the other Slayer.
Faith's eyes started to flutter closed as she began to lose consciousness. Buffy watched as the other Slayer started to fall, everything happening in slow motion. She stepped forward in an attempt to grab the dark Slayer to stop her falling only to find herself dragged into the dark abyss along with her.
End Slayer Dream:
Int: Sunnydale General Hospital ICU
Buffy woke with a start; she was shaking and covered in a layer of sweat She looked over to Faith and saw the dark Slayer was frowning, her heart rate elevated; she was obviously still reeling from the emotion of that dream.
Buffy reached over and pushed some stray locks of hair away from Faith's face.
"Faith," she whispered, wanting to comfort the injured Slayer, "It's ok…I won't let anything…anyone hurt you." Buffy said with conviction, hoping her voice would soothe the distressed Slayer. She glanced worriedly at the racing ECG trace, furiously recording Faith's elevated heart rate.
"Shhh…" Buffy rubbed Faith's cheek and then gently kissed her forehead. She was relieved to see the ECG finally slow down as the other Slayer responded to her soothing touch.
Buffy was about to sit back down when she felt Faith squeeze her hand. She looked down at the injured hand, bruised and bloody knuckles a sharp contrast to Buffy's own manicured hand. She wasn't sure if she was imagining things so she leant over the injured Slayer once again.
"Faith?" she whispered softly, staring into the brunette's bruised but still beautiful face. Relief flooded her when she saw Faith's eyelids start to flutter, trying to open.
Faith was struggling to make her eyes comply with her wishes, the lids were so heavy and she felt so tired. She squinted against the bright glare of the fluorescent lights, the brightness hurting her eyes. At first she was confused; the monotonous tone of the ECG in the background, the white, sterile looking room. Her vision was blurry but she knew she was not alone, she could feel Buffy was in the room. She managed a small smile but regretted it straight away as pain rushed through her.
"Hey, B…" her voice was so raspy and her throat was sore and dry from the oxygen. She tried to swallow but winced from the pain.
"Hey…" Buffy couldn't hide the relief in her voice, "Welcome back." She said, smiling at the dark Slayer.
"Hurts…" Faith said, frowning as she tried to fight back the pain coursing through her body.
"I'll go get someone." Buffy was about to leave but Faith's grip on her hand tightened, "Don't go." She pleaded, her eyes imploring Buffy to stay. Buffy squeezed Faith's hand, reassuringly, "I'll only be gone a second, the doctor will want to know you're awake."
Faith shut her eyes tightly against the pain as she gave a small nod.
"Welcome back, Miss Lehane." The doctor said, entering the room, Buffy close on her heels, "I'm Dr. Jordan."
"Hey." Faith's voice was a whisper.
"How do you feel?" She inquired, starting to take readings from the variety of machines Faith was attached to.
"I think she's in a lot of pain." Buffy jumped in, realizing that it hurt Faith to speak.
The doctor nodded, "Not surprising, considering the extent of your injuries." She continued writing things in Faith's chart. Finally she looked up and smiled at the Slayer, "I'll get you some pain meds and then I'd like to conduct a physical examination, if you don't mind?" Faith nodded slightly as the doctor smiled at her again before turning to leave the room.
Faith turned to Buffy and raised an eyebrow, characteristic smirk on her face, "Physical examination…?" she whispered, humor evident in her raspy voice. The doctor was hot and she knew it would embarrass Buffy…she could be such a prude sometimes.
Buffy chuckled as she grinned back at Faith, "You're incorrigible, ya know!"
"Jealous, B?" Faith managed, testing the waters. Buffy paused and stared intently at the other Slayer, trying to gauge her.
"Right, here's some good stuff to get rid of all that pain." Buffy sighed with relief, saved by the bell, or so to speak. She watched as the doctor stuck the needle into the IV port and injected the clear contents into Faith's IV line. She turned to Faith and saw her tense, pained expression finally relax as the morphine kicked in.
"That's good stuff." Faith croaked appreciatively, enjoying the lack of pain, and the feeling of euphoria the drug gave her.
The doctor just chuckled and then turned to Buffy, "I'm going to perform an examination now, if you don't mind…" she gestured for Buffy to leave but Faith kept holding the blonde Slayer's hand, "I'd like her to stay…" she turned to the doctor, her expression imploring. The Doctor glanced up at Buffy and then back to her patient, "Sure, it's up to you." She said, smiling knowingly.
"Oh, we're not…" Faith wanted to crack up laughing at Buffy's mortified expression when she realized what the Doctor was thinking. Buffy stopped mid-sentence because Dr Jordan was listening to Faith's heart with her stethoscope and probably couldn't hear her anyway.
"Cute pout, B" Faith said softly, raising an eyebrow at the blonde Slayer. Buffy turned to Faith and frowned, she stared at Faith for a while, eventually making the brunette uncomfortable. "What's up?" Faith asked, breaking the uncomfortable silence.
"Huh, oh…" Buffy flushed with embarrassment, "It's just…" she paused, choosing her words, "It's good to have you back, Faith." Buffy finally said. Faith picked up on the double entendre in that statement but her confusion was interrupted as she stifled a yelp of pain. She turned back to Dr. Jordan who was poking and prodding cracked and bruised ribs and abdominal injuries…
"Sorry." Jordan looked apologetically at her patient.
"It's cool." Faith hissed through clenched teeth, silently wishing for more morphine.
Buffy's concerned expression was not lost on Faith. The blonde Slayer was looking at the brunette's broken body with serious concern.
"Hey B, it's ok, I'm 5x5, no big!" Faith said, trying to make light of her injuries. Buffy just glared at Faith, letting the other Slayer know that her injuries were no laughing matter.
Dr Jordan left, promising to return a little later to check up on her. Buffy turned to the other Slayer once the doctor was gone, "Your injuries…they're…"
"B, it's ok…"
"Faith, listen to me." Buffy said, desperation in her voice, "They're not healing properly."
"Huh…what do you mean, not healing properly?" Faith said, sitting up as much as her injuries would allow.
"Properly is probably not the right word." Buffy corrected herself, "Fast enough is more appropriate."
"What are you saying, B?" Faith asked, starting to get a bit concerned.
"Your slayer healing should be taking care of things faster." Buffy said, "You've been here for 5 days already…"
"5 DAYS!" Faith exploded, immediately regretting it but she continued anyway, lowering her voice, "I was unconscious for 5 days?" she asked, her wavering voice betraying her emotion.
"Yeah," Buffy said softly, fully aware of how much Faith hated hospitals, and how much she would be hating the fact that she had been in another coma, "I'll call Giles, he'll know what to do." Buffy said, scared now for the other Slayer.
Faith rested her head against the pillow resignedly, "Ok." She said, staring at the ceiling.
Int: LAX International Airport
"Here." Giles handed Willow a cup of coffee. She glanced up at him and smiled slightly, "Thanks." She said softly. She stared at the cup in her hands, watching the steam escape from the small drinking hole. She was mesmerized by the swirling and dancing motions.
Giles sighed and sat down heavily opposite his charge. She had hardly said 2 words since they left Sunnydale. Dawn and Xander had dropped them off at the airport in LA and now they were just waiting for their turn to board the flight to London.
"It's going to be ok, Willow." Giles said softly, concerned for the Wicca. Willow flashed him a quick, hostile glare before dropping her eyes to concentrate on the steam again. The flash of darkness that crossed her eyes sent chills through Giles, but he maintained his composure and continued to sip his tea in silence.
They both jumped when the silence was shattered by the incessant ringing of his cellular phone. Willow couldn't help but smirk a little as she watched Giles getting all flustered as he tried to locate the 'annoying device' in his carry on luggage.
"Hello." He spoke into the mouth piece but almost dropped the phone when it continued to ring. He looked at it curiously, finally noticing the little green button which he was supposed to press to answer his calls. "Hello." He said into the receiver, hoping for more success this time.
"Giles!" The desperation in Buffy's voice came loudly through the receiver; Willow raised an eyebrow, her attention on Giles. "It's Faith…" Willow heard this and her heart sunk, every time she thought about what she had done to the dark Slayer she wanted to run to the bathroom and empty her stomach. She wanted to cry and scream how sorry she was. She didn't think she'd be able to cope if anything happened to Faith, not now.
"Her Slayer healing…it's…it's Broken." Buffy exclaimed into the receiver on her end,
Giles was stumped for a second; he was watching Willow, "Define, 'broken'." He said slowly, frowning as he watched the witch try to compose herself.
"She's not healing fast enough." Buffy said.
"Is she ok otherwise?" he asked his Slayer.
"She woke up." Buffy said, relief evident in her voice.
Giles saw Willow relax; she had been sitting tensely at the edge of her seat. "That's good…that's very good." He said, a small smile gracing his lips, he'd been concerned that the dark Slayer wouldn't make it, her injuries had been so severe. He felt responsible as he was the one to encourage her to come and help with the situation. He smiled at Willow, trying to reassure her, "I'll see what I can find out about her, um, 'Broken Slayer healing'." Giles said, "I'll get back to you, take care, Buffy." He chuckled a little at Buffy's description of Faith's problem.
"Thanks Giles." She hung up.
Giles looked at the phone in his hand for a second, frowning. He was about to dial the number for the coven in England when Willow interrupted him.
"There's no need to call them, I know what's wrong with her." She said softly. The intensity in her gaze scared Giles.
Int: Sunnydale General Hospital ICU
"Hey, how're you doing?" Buffy asked as she walked into Faith's room. The other Slayer was staring at the ceiling, obviously deep in thought because she didn't acknowledge that Buffy was there. Buffy walked up to the bed cautiously, she was worried about Faith and didn't want to startle her. She reached out to touch Faith's shoulder to try and get her attention but was interrupted before she made contact.
"I don't know what I'd do if I lost my Slayer powers." Faith said, not taking her eyes of the ceiling. Buffy could see tears starting to form in the dark Slayers eyes, she was fighting them but they were still there. She turned to Buffy, fear in her eyes, "I don't know how to be anything else." She said, her voice so full of despair it broke Buffy's heart. The blonde was about to lean over and embrace the dark Slayer when her cell phone rang. She gave Faith a small guilty smile as she looked at the display on her phone, "It's Giles, he might know what's wrong with you." She said as she answered the phone quickly, hoping none of the nurses had heard the ringing.
Faith watched Buffy talking on the phone to Giles, it was a very one sided conversation with just the occasional, 'I see', 'Uh huh', 'Really', being the contribution the blonde Slayer made. She hung up and turned to Faith.
"Bad news?" Faith said dejectedly, avoiding eye contact with the other Slayer.
"Well, it's not permanent." Buffy said happily, enjoying the brief look of relief wash over the other Slayer. "It was Willow." Buffy said slowly, "When she…" she paused, not too sure whether she really wanted to be having this conversation, she watched Faith trying to gauge the dark Slayer's reaction. She was sitting up in her bed, all her attention focused on Buffy, not showing any signs that she didn't want to discuss her fight with Willow.
Buffy continued, "When she used magic on you, at the demon temple, she weakened your Slayer essence." Faith was still staring at Buffy, confusion rapidly becoming the main emotion on her face. "I guess it's a bit like the cruciamentum, only a Willow magically administered dose, it should wear off in a few days."
"Right," Faith said slowly, not to sure what to think about the whole situation. She turned to Buffy, "How is Willow?" she asked softly.
"Still alive…thanks to you." Buffy said, sitting on the edge of the bed, staring intently at the dark slayer, "Thank you." She said, squeezing Faith's hand, "For coming back to help me…help her…we owe you a lot."
Faith felt the familiar tingling sensation as Buffy took her hand, she flashed back to the Slayer dream; Buffy standing so close to her, holding her hand, but then she remembered the knife; the blood on Buffy's hands; she couldn't shake the images from her memory, the feeling of foreboding. She looked at Buffy; the smile on the other Slayer's face warmed her heart. But she couldn't smile back; she was too confused; she expected, no, needed Buffy to be mad at her for everything she'd done in the past. She couldn't understand why the blonde Slayer was being nice to her, she couldn't accept it, not after everything she had done to her. She needed Buffy to hit her or yell at her or do something.
There was a time when Faith had thought she'd be able to atone for her past actions, maybe even seek forgiveness from the blonde Slayer for all she had done; There are some things you can't just take back, no matter how sorry you are…her own thoughts rang in her head; she couldn't forgive herself, wouldn't forgive herself, for her actions; she was a murderer…a cold blooded killer.
A myriad of emotions were coursing through Faith as she stared incredulous at the blonde Slayer; the realization that she might actually forgive Faith her past deeds scared the dark Slayer. She wasn't looking for forgiveness, wasn't ready to accept forgiveness from anyone, especially not Buffy. Faith realized then and there that, as much as she wanted to try and make things right with the other Slayer, she just wasn't ready; she had to forgive herself first, and she wasn't sure she'd ever be able to do that.
Buffy frowned at the conflict of emotions playing out on the dark Slayers face, "You ok." She was concerned about the injured Slayer.
"Don't." Faith was tired of all the pretences and niceties. She looked up at the blonde Slayer noticing that Buffy was still holding her hand so she pulled it out of the blonde's grasp. A hurt look flickered across Buffy's face as she looked at Faith, confused.
"Don't, B." Faith said, this time with more conviction, "I'm tired of this little 'game' we keep playing, pretending everything is all right between us when it's not…" Faith stared intently at the blonde Slayer, "…it will never be." She said softly, her voice betraying how tired and exhausted she still was.
"Faith, I…"
"Just go." Faith cut Buffy off and then lay back in her bed, staring at the ceiling, refusing to look at the blonde; it hurt too much and Faith needed to do this, she needed to be strong, if she looked at Buffy now her resolve would fail and she would change her mind; she couldn't allow that happen, not yet…she wasn't ready.
Buffy sat on the bed for a few seconds, shocked, annoyed, finally, angry. "Fine," She stormed off but turned back to Faith before leaving, "Wallow in your self pity, see what I care...that knife keeps coming between us because you're LETTING it, F!" And with that she was gone.
Faith couldn't help the sad smile that graced her lips, "Always gotta have the last word, hey B?" she blew out a long, shaky breath, not sure which hurt more; having B stick a knife in her gut or the feeling of her heart tearing in two as she watched the blonde Slayer storm off.