Chapter Six

We Need to Talk

Emma texted her best friend Manny once Sean left. Of course, Manny had over a dozen questions in the form of texts. Emma figured it was Friday anyhow so she decided to have a girl's night with Manny to debrief.

She knocked on Manny's door, her father less than enthused, and asked with a yawn, "Do you sleep, Emma? It's almost 10." He still let her inside. Manny was in the kitchen making a snack of popcorn for them. The pair had been best friends since kindergarten and preschool. He knew Emma well and she was a frequent visitor to the house and vice versa. They without a single word went into Manny's bedroom.

Manny almost instantly and quietly apologized to her dad, "Sorry about my dad, you know how he gets."

"I'm sorry, but this couldn't really wait."

"So how's it going?" She asked talking with a mouthful of popcorn, "with Sean that is."

"It all went better than expected tonight. He came over for dinner, we watched this old movie about a boxer it was okay, no drama, no outbursts."

"That's great. So when are my favorite little love birds going to make it all Facerange official in the biblical sense?"

Emma flustered, "We'll cross that bridge when we get to it." She saw that as a way to change the subject. "So did you discuss with your parents the Philadelphia trip?"

"I don't know, Emma."

"What do you mean you don't know? You did ask right?"

Manny shook her head no, "I think he'll likely say no anyway."

"What might I say no to?" Mr. Santos overheard, after all, in her apartment the walls are thin. He was one of those types of parents who almost always had to watch what you say as if he were listening. Manny was often grounded as a youngster for the most ridiculous things. His strictness is an understatement of the century. Sometimes he can be cool though.

As Joseph sat in the crook of the door she asked, "Dad, well, there's this trip for school to Philadelphia. Everybody is going."

Mr. Santos thought to himself, "Emma's coming, good. Liberty she's good too. Boys?"

"We'll be in separate rooms, it's a school trip."

"Will there be adult chaperones?"

Manny nodded, "Yes, yes, and yes. The only thing is it's five days, and it costs money. I got to get a passport in the coming weeks too. Please, dad?"

"Oy, what? How much are we talking about? We'll have to talk it over with mommy but it's definitely possible. I don't mind helping out and you do have money from that movie you were in. I know I wanted you to set it aside for your future but-."

"Is that a yes, Mr. Santos?"

"So it's a maybe, a probably."

"Thanks for considering it."

Even though Joseph ruled Santos home, he still had to let her in the loop and listen to Julietta's input. She's his wife and her mother after all. Julieta was also just as strict at times strict but could be more lenient than her husband. Someone had to play bad cop but worst of all, she was a worrier. If her dad knew half the things she'd been through he'd justify his strict standards. So she more or less leans on her mother for support.

"I'll leave you girls be." Joseph smiled, "goodnight, I assume you are staying the night, Miss Emma?"

Emma nodded her head yes, "Goodnight Mr. Santos."

Manny turned her attention back to Emma, "So what is it?"

"I have this weird sinking suspicious feeling something is about to go horribly wrong."

"Elaborate on this Emma."

Emma explained as she paced, "Sean and if he ever found out about the ravine and Jay."

"I'm eating." She was disgusted, "Don't talk about that skeeze while I'm eating." She swallowed her food and moved the popcorn away, "Well have you said anything to suggest that?"

Emma shook her head.

"I don't think he and Jay hang out very much, but what if somebody else tells him?"

"I don't think people remember, you're giving Jay too much credit. It was consensual, he was in a relationship with Ellie at the time, and you were messy at the time. Every girl is entitled to a few secrets."

"Kind of agree of course, but I kind of made this stupid pact with Sean that no secrets would be between us."

Manny was startled by that, "Past or present?"

"I don't know, it was kind of vague."

"I don't think it's like that." Manny smiled, "just smile on the positive. You have him in your life again, he's a good guy. Just relax. Deep breaths, sometimes I think I should get a psychology degree."

"Why?"

"Handing out advice is better than condoms."

They both laughed, and Manny asked Emma. "Remember when you were going on about how I never had a boyfriend speech so thoughtful and how great Jordan 'was'. The just of it is about how great it was being with who you thought you'd be with. Now, look at you absolutely smitten with a guy we'd known since we were wee seventh graders."

"Manny please, I'd like to erase Jordan from my memory, I've grown so much since then as a person."

"I know, and that's what I'm saying in so many words."

"You're a little too wordy, Manny."

"Oh! I must be if I'm going to be this fabulous actress." Manny grinned, "I got Berniece Fine as my agent. She's going to represent me. She loved my monologue, and boy was that hard to memorize. I also got the part of Rizzo in Grease for the school musical. I've never sung but I couldn't hold it in anymore I was about to burst."

"One thing at a time! Everything is going so well it seems. I'm so proud of you, bestie." Emma side-hugged her and smiled into the embrace.

"You've come so far since last year, and I couldn't be prouder of my best friend in the world."

xxxxx

The early alarm woke him quickly. Fortunately, Sean managed a few winks of sleep, a solid twenty minutes but he still felt like he had been slammed by a bus. He only had a swig from Jay's flask and it took him out, not to mention the news he learned about Emma. The latter being something he wished he hadn't asked to know. He wished he never walked into The Dot after hours. He doesn't know where he and Jay or him and Emma for that matter stand. For now, he needed to get the cobwebs out. He jumped into the shower and quickly got dressed in a plain white tee and some jeans. He put on his grey hoodie when he felt out the window the chill from outside. He put his key in the ignition and headed on over to the Simpson-Nelson house. He parked the car and walked to the door and knocked.

Mr. Simpson opened the door and Sean was standing before him, "Was I supposed to meet you here or?"

"Here is fine. We'll take my car." Archie affirmed kindly, "you alright?"

"Didn't sleep much." Sean replied shortly packed with an excuse, "not exactly an early morning kind of guy."

"That's alright, we'll stop for coffee if you want."

"Sure," Sean answered looking out the window, a habit when he's a passenger in somebody else's car.

They hit up a small coffee shop next to the post office and each got a medium coffee. Sean put in loads of sugar and cream while Simpson just put some cream in and called it a day. The process was pretty painless, he had his picture taken which didn't look so hot but he figured he could always retake it if he ever had to renew. Mr. Simpson paid the fee and they were out of the office within about an hour. "If you want, Emma might be home you can tell her the good news about your new passport."

He whipped his head around quickly, "Where'd she go?"

"She decided to spend the night over at casa Santos. This is pretty much not a surprise, you know how they are. Girls are. I will say I really like that you and Emma are spending a lot of time together. It's good for her."

Sean nodded his head outwardly and silently accepted the answer. The sweet-sounding words, but didn't necessarily understand or could even claim to know who he befriended or is fake dating anymore. He needs to confront her, but how? He didn't want to blow up like earlier and cause a scene. He just wants her to be honest with him. Sean would admit it was awkward spending time with Mr. Simpson outside of school. This conversation needs to happen between him and Emma herself. He figured they'll go to the park and walk if she was around. It sounds like Simpson knew about Emma's time in the ravine just by that remark or perhaps he was overthinking the entire thing. He felt the sting of betrayal from his so-called friend, who ironically Emma had warned him about. Tracker even warned him. Did he listen to them? No.

o, Emma meant and still means a lot to him. He kept thinking about what Jay said. Not just about Emma, not the cruel remarks, or lack of faith, or whatever but about the possibility even small that he might have fallen for her. At this point, two of their cardinal rules in this elaborate hoax of a relationship have been broken. It's dunzo. He hasn't even thought of Ellie. The first thought, the last thought, the last person he texted, the last person he dreamt of, and every thought since has been Emma.

He'd be lying if he didn't feel something. He ignored pushed down and hoped to erase but something keeps her etched onto his brain. He remembered as he touched his chest the tattoo he had gotten in Wasaga at the tattoo shop. He got Emma tattooed while drunk. Even his subconscious knew. As if it were some fateful thing that ended up occurring. It was her. It had always been her.

When Mr. Simpson and Sean pulled up at the house, Emma was waiting outside. "I forgot my key to get back in and mom shut the basement window again when she was doing laundry."

"I should really nail that window shut if I know what's good for me."

"Ha ha, very funny, Archie. Anyway, you okay Sean?"

Sean kept looking at her and wondering if he was even talking about them. She of course is beautiful in his opinion, she is friendly to a fault and she was caring and concerned for him. "Can I talk to you? Alone?"

"Sure?"

Simpson went inside and left them alone. Emma sat on the little bench outside the porch and motioned for Sean to come to with her. He did it without hesitation and asked, "So how was your morning?"

She chuckled and shrugged, "Um, it was okay. How was the post office with Simpson? What did you want to talk to me about?"

"I have a question, and if it's inappropriate I'll just shut up but I just need to know something."

Emma hesitated a moment and wondered what he wanted to ask. Why it'd be appropriate? "I can't answer if I don't know what it is or how it might be inappropriate given our rules and situation?"

Sean just assumed out with the question, so he asked her blankly, "You've been to Bennett Park right?"

"W-what kind of question is that? Yeah, it is inappropriate Sean. Qualifies in the inappropriate personal question territory." She crossed her arms and squinted her eyes while shaking her head, "Where did that come from?"

"So you've been?" He asked awkwardly, "or no?"

She didn't say anything until she finally let out some words in the form of a question, "Why are you asking me this?"

"I just wanted to know. I thought as your fake boyfriend and friend, I should know."

"I've been, okay?" Emma sighed realizing affirming is worse. She turned to him on the little outside bench by the porch.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Sean asked after a short pause, he finally sat down.

"It's not something I want to advertise."

"I suppose you're right. I just, I heard something I didn't want to believe and I just wanted to know if there was any truth."

"I didn't want you to know if that makes sense. Embarrassing. It was sort of a stupid mistake." Emma avoided his look. She can see everything melting away any sort of allure or attraction was gone, or so she thought. "Who said something about that?"

"Um Jay actually made this implication about you, and that he'd seen you there, at Bennett Park at like some party."

Emma's eyes closed exasperatedly she quietly murmured to herself, "Great." Finally, she added, "Sean, I can't believe I'm about to have this conversation with you right now. What is it you want to know?"

"I don't know. I guess I just need to know, did you guys, never mind."

Emma calmly as she could possibly be because somebody had to be. She felt like the best course of action was honesty. "I think you know you want to know something. I'll tell you, but only if it's what you want. I just don't want you to hate me."

"It's just you said no secrets between us." Sean answered, "to keep it going I need to know if there's anything I need to know."

"So you asked, yes I went to Bennett Park. When I was there, I had a stupid, meaningless thing with somebody. I want to preface it with, the simple fact I had just had a gun pointed at me. I don't think I should be held accountable for something like that happening when I wasn't in the best state. Moving on, it's something I don't think about light. The only reason I didn't tell you is that I didn't want you to be angry with me or hate me."

"Emma, I don't hate you. You're talking to the master of mistakes. I mean that. Never could hate you," Sean finally dropped the question he most wanted to know, "Who was he? The one you had the thing with?"

"Doesn't matter, I figured it would be more upsetting in general and less about a who in this situation?"

"No secrets."

She felt backed into a corner so she finally answered, "Well you heard it from Jay, I suppose that's a question for him."

"Why Jay?"

"This is why I didn't fucking mention it. I just knew you'd be upset."

Sean implied, "It's not you I'm upset with, I just honestly don't understand, why you? Did he? Oh gosh, I had a feeling but I honestly didn't think it was real."

"None of it was. I would take it back if I could," Emma shook her head in disbelief. "So what does it change?"

"Everything." A large silence encapsulated the two of them for a minute, perhaps he was being a bit melodramatic. She felt like crap as did he. She felt worse. He simply reminded her, "I mean we've got Paige's big party tonight. I mean, it doesn't ruin everything. We'll dress nicely and sharply. We don't have to talk about it I guess. It goes in the vault so to speak."

She wished it were that simple with a sobering expression. She decided she needed some much-needed rest before the party where she had to face him again. Sean looked as if he needed it. The last thing they both wanted was to be emotionally involved. That's precisely what they'd become even if they're oblivious yet it's obvious to others. He kissed her cheek before he bid her goodbye and went on home.

"Where's Sean?"

Emma shrugged watching him drive off, "He left."

Snake asked Emma with concern. "Is everything okay?" They had only spoken for a few moments and assumed it wasn't good whatever was said.

"I don't really know right now."

xxxxx

With everything weighing heavily, despite the fact he's acting as if it doesn't bother him while it bothers him. He doesn't know how he's going to make the night, he barely made it last night. Emma got a text from Manny, and she ended up going over there a few hours before Sean was to pick her up for the party.

Manny and Emma went big going through Emma's closet. "So what happened? Why so glum chum?"

Emma shook her head at the latest outfit Manny showed her, and then got serious for a moment. "He knew, I mean he knows what happened at the ravine."

Manny gasped her reply, "Shit. Em, I'm sorry. I didn't breathe a word honest."

Emma answered quickly, "Not you, Jay Hogart."

"Who is to say he only said that because he's salty about Sean spending time with you?"

"Jay, I don't think so. Why would he be jealous of a farce?" Emma boldly replied caught herself and shut her mouth after quietly stating, "it's not what you think."

Manny whined, "A fraud relationship? Emma, you two were my last hope in true love! Coo Coo bananas!"

"How could it love, true love, be real? After all, I'm not able to have nice things, Manny remember? Nothing ever sticks with me. Besides, we dated twice and both ended disastrously."

"Stop Em, you ought seriously to stop beating yourself up about that." Manny told her softly, "it was a long time ago. Did you try telling him that? What you went through? How he wasn't around? Not to mention, he was with Ellie, he can't be mad at you. If he does screw him."

"To tell you the truth it seemed like his beef lies with Jay. What about this one?" Emma held up a dress to herself to change the topic, "I can maybe put a big red letter E. Scarlet letter kind of? Maybe I can borrow your black wedges?"

"Stop it. I mean it." They admired the little black dress in the mirror as Manny kept going on about Emma and Sean. "It can't be totally fake, I mean he forgave you, and he still wants you on his arm at the party. It has to count for something."

"I don't think so, forgiveness and try nothing and Manny, you can't tell anybody. It's just an elaborate rouse to get what we both want. If I can help him and not stand in the way of true love for Ellie and him, and he's totally cool with Peter and me. Then where's the lie?"

"I won't tell, but what if things change?"

"The plan then changes. We adapt. Or we end it."

"You're gonna get yourself hurt, it's a dangerous game." Manny asked walking toward her to get a good look at the ensemble, "Do you have feelings?"

She avoided Manny's gaze as she denied she tried and failed to let it bubble to the surface. Crestfallen she answered sort of snappy, "It doesn't matter what I feel. The door is probably closed, it's in his court. If he can't see me, the me that exists he's lost me already. Warts and all, if he can't accept I did make a few regrettable choices, he shouldn't have to forgive me for shit honestly."

Truth be told, a small sliver of Emma had this hope they'd forget and drop the whole scam and he'd reveal he had some feelings. It'd have to be grand and most importantly real. She knew the chances of that are practically zero, it was never gonna happen. She doesn't find it practical to wish or bank upon impossible odds. So she banishes that feeling as far away as she can, to not get her hopes up. Now that she's met and spoken to Peter he's no longer a mystery. Crush demotes into thin air and now it doesn't matter anymore. It doesn't mean that that was true for Sean. She'd be lying if she didn't like all the time and attention. She felt flattered and seen. Even if Sean was extremely disappointed in her. She's thinking all the worse, how it could cause a permanent rift in their relationship or simply open up another can of worms. Right now he's acting like some jealous boyfriend over a year-old hookup or a fling.

Manny felt sad for her friend, "Sure it does. Look at you, you're more than a little involved. Joke or no joke, newsflash! You have feelings and you're only human. I think I know my best friend a lot more than he does. I've known ya longer."

"He feels how he does, and I feel the way I do."

"Ugh God you guys are stubborn, practically made for each other and you don't even realize it!"

"Manny this is not Westdrive. Sometimes what we want, isn't always what we get."

"I know this is real. Think about it! When was the last time it'd ever been about Ellie?" She uncomfortably shrugged as Manny questioned. "Why would he care about what you did while he was in Wasaga if he didn't have any feelings for you? Put it to you this way, and think about it, really think about it. Having a conversation like that would put it into perspective."

"It's just he respects me as a human, a friend and that's all. It's not like that don't you dare plant ideas about him in my head! I don't want to lose his respect or my own. Manny, I'm afraid."

"Of what?"

"Rejection and putting myself out there, being vulnerable again, it's hopeless. I think too much had happened and I don't want to get in a tizzy about it because nothing is going on between us."

"Liar liar pants on fire." Manny muttered and Emma darted another pointed glare and she sighed, 'okay fine."

Manny changed the subject and answered Emma's previous question. "Sure you can borrow my wedges. They'll look nice together." Manny finally gave an answer about the fit Emma was modeling. She pulled them out of her closet and stuck them on her feet, "Perfect. You look perfect. Just like you and Sean."

"Shame you're not coming to the party." Emma sighed as they both stood in the tall mirror beside one another.

"Let's face facts, Paige wouldn't want me there, and all that fun stuff truce or no truce. It's a bummer to miss out on but I want details between you and Sean, no matter how 'ingenuine' your relationship may be." Emma glared, and Manny added. "I won't speak a word to anyone. You just have to give me details no matter what."

"What are friends for?" Emma asked, "of course, I will."

Emma kept thinking about him, and the conversation she and Sean had earlier. Emma got ready for the party with Manny. Manny did her makeup and straightened her hair, she looked pretty when all was said and done. She felt like she was going to a big dance or something. Sort of like the time Manny couldn't attend the dance and she found the company with Sean. It was different before, Emma reasons. It was pre-everything their first meeting. She felt somewhat nostalgic for the past when everything was less complicated.

She was kind of upset with the fact he was probably going to hold it against her. He promised he'd be more understanding. While she figured she should've told him, she felt uncomfortable because then she'd have to relive everything all over again.

Quite frankly, she wanted to keep what happened with Jay in the ravine in the past under wraps. Now her secret is out to the last person she wanted it to be shared with.