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Chapter 20

Winners and Losers

So now the cat was finally out of the bag. Things were worse than ever before. I had never felt so angry, so hurt, so betrayed until that day. To me, it was all because of the girl. Ryo Hayasawa. She was the reason why my mother treated me the way she did. She saw Ryo as her real daughter. Enough was enough. I wasn't going to stand for it anymore. If it had just been Hiroki I could've lived with it. But now that it involved my mother, now that I knew the real reason why Ryo was admitted to Kisaragi, it was now a personal matter. In my mind, Ryo had to go. The next thing I remember doing after leaving my mother's office was storming all the way to the baseball club.

Ryo and her teammates were just getting ready for today's practice match when their club room door suddenly burst open. Everyone gasped when they saw who it was.

The Chairwoman's daughter stood in the doorway, staring at Ryo with such anger, such hatred, she could actually feel it. Her whole body trembled as though she was fighting to keep herself from losing control.

"Himuro-san?"

She had never seen her like this before. Something had happened after their last meeting. Izumi's anger wasn't because of her constant pestering to join the baseball. No, this was something else. Something far deeper.

Izumi moved closer, her eyes never leaving hers.

"I've had it with you."

"Huh?" she blinked several times.

"I said... I've had it with you, Hayakawa!"

She saw Izumi's fists clench tighter and she instinctively stepped back.

"With me?" she whispered back, "But why?"

"Because you don't belong here. You don't belong in this school!"

She could see the emotions raging in Izumi's eyes. She could tell that it wasn't the real reason, but she doubted Izumi would tell her if she asked.

"What's... wrong with you?" for the first time in her life she was afraid. Afraid for her life. Izumi looked like she wanted to kill her.

Then her teammates finally spoke up.

"Yeah, what's your problem? Who do you think you are coming in here talking to her like that?"

"You asking for a fight, tennis girl?"

"Do you think being the Chairperson's spoiled daughter is going to keep us from kicking your little pink butt, Princess!"

Izumi didn't seem to hear them. All her focus was on Ryo.

A long and tense moment passed, then a loud bark of laughter made everyone jump. Coach Kido stood there in the doorway, a look of glee on his scruffy face.

"Well, hello there, Princess," he stepped inside and placed his hand on Izumi's shoulder, "So, here to join?"

Izumi only response was brushing his hand off.

"I don't think-" Ryo started to say, but the coach interrupted her.

"Why else would the Princess be here except to join you? She's just-"

"Me join her?!" Izumi turned her fury on him.

"Oh," he grinned, "It sounds like you hate Hayakawa a lot, don't you?"

Izumi turned her gaze back to her, "Yes."

Ryo couldn't help but flinch, "You hate me?"

"If that's the case, Coach Kido's mischievous smile came to his lips, "Why not settle this issue once and for all?"

Everyone's attention was now riveted to him.

"Settle this how?" asked Izumi.

The coach placed himself between her and Ryo, looking back and forth at them.

"The two of you have been going head to head since Hayakawa got here," he stated, "And it seems the last time you went at it wasn't clear who really won. So why not compete to prove who's best?"

"Just what do you mean by compete?" said Ryo.

"Compete as in a baseball game. Winner take all! Hayakawa's pitching versus Himuro's batting. Ryo wins if Himuro strikes out. Himuro wins if she gets to first."

Izumi suddenly smiled and Ryo felt a chill go down her spine. When they had faced each other last time Izumi had been quick to adapt in hitting her pitch. Therefor she was very confident in her skills. However...

"And of course we'll be using a real baseball this time, right?" said Izumi.

That's right. Last time they had been using a tennis ball.

Coach Kido nodded before declaring, "And if Hayakawa wins then you have to join the baseball team, Princess."

"Very well, but I've got a condition of my own," she looked at Ryo again, "If I win the baseball team will be dissolved and Hayakawa leaves school. Permanently."

Another tense moment passed after she made her terms.

"Well?" Coach Kido turned to his ace pitcher, "What do you say Hayakawa?"

Something ignited inside her and she glared back at Izumi. Fine! If that's the way she wants to play it so be it!

"Let's do it then!"

And so the match was set for the day after tomorrow. It would finally be settled between me and her. I was driven by a rage I had never experienced before. For the next day and a half day I practiced nonstop without ever taking a break. Since we were now using a real baseball I had to go to the batting cages the boys team used for practice so I could get used to hitting them.

I still remember how that first night went. I made the silly mistake in thinking that hitting a baseball was no different from hitting a tennis ball. I soon learned otherwise. For one I had to set the pitching machine to the same speed as Ryo's pitch, which was at least a hundred miles per hour. Have you tried hitting an object that is coming at you at that speed? Have you ever tried hitting a ball that is hard as a rock? It's nothing but pure torture. I've always been amazed how baseball players are able to do it.

Within an hour my body was a complete wreck. I ached all over, my arms were shaking, and I could barely grip the bat. All the balls I had managed to hit had either gone foul or nowhere at all. Only sheer determination drove me on. My tennis coach eventually found me and was horrified at what I was doing to myself. He begged me to stop, but I was well beyond stopping. I wasn't going to stop. I couldn't stop. I would not stop until I drove that girl out of my school and out of my life. Eventually he turned to my mother.

"Izumi."

She heard her voice behind her but didn't turn or stop what she was doing.

"Don't come any closer unless you want to get hurt!" she warned over her shoulder, "It's set at the speed she throws at. A hundred miles per hour!"

Her mother didn't move as she swung at the next ball.

"Your tennis coach just called and asked me to stop you from doing this," she explained.

Another ball, another swing.

"Just ignore him," she stiffly replied, not wanting to lose her concentration.

"I know about this challenge match of yours. You're doing because of the relationship I had with her father. Aren't you, Izumi?"

"You know that's not what it is! This is all about her!" she swung again, "You see her as a way to connect with your dead lover again when you have a family standing right in front of you, but you pretend otherwise!" and again, "I asked so little of you but you refuse to give it. I'm not going to put up with it anymore!" and again, "I'm going to make you notice me no matter what it takes!"

She swung again and the impact knocked her off balance. She finally fell on one knee. Out of concern Keiko started to step forward... then gasped in horror when she saw blood running down the length of the bat.

"Your hands..."

"It's from the cage, Mother," Izumi stood back up.

"The cage?"

"There's something all your money could never give me, Mother. I'm not some pretty little bird that you can keep in a gilded cage forever. And if the only way to get you to notice me is by smashing this cage to pieces... I'll claw through these bars with my bare hands."

"Izumi..."

She finally turned to her and said, "Just let me do this, Mother!"

Eventually she realized there was nothing she could do to stop me and had no choice but to let the match continue. The hours passed, into the morning, all through noon, and into the night. But after hours upon hours I still couldn't hit the ball properly. I hadn't improved one bit. It was beginning to look hopeless.

Izumi watched the last ball she hit roll harmlessly back to the pitching machine, which had mercifully run out of balls to shoot.

"It's no good," the bat fell from her hands, disgusted that she felt like crying, "There's no way I'm going to beat her like this, and the competition's tomorrow."

Then I received some unexpected help.

"Giving up so soon?"

She gasped and looked up to see Hiroki walking over to her, still dressed in his baseball jersey.

"Hiroki..." she was suddenly so happy to see him she almost threw herself at him, "What are you doing here? Isn't practice already over?"

"Our practice ended early," he made a little grin, "Our coach told us that we couldn't use the batting cages because someone had reserved them all. I think your Mom also had something to do with it."

Izumi grimaced, having forgotten.

"I'm sorry..." she whispered, but Hiroki ignored it.

"You're not really going to give up, are you?" he raised a brow, "That's not the Izumi I know."

"But I..." she couldn't find the words.

"Your biggest mistake is thinking this violent practice is going to improve your hitting. You got the power! It's the finesse you lack. If you really want to stand a chance you've got to be willing to listen to someone else for a change."

She stared at him, her heart beginning to beat rapidly.

"You'll help me?" she almost broke down crying in relief.

His grin broadened, "Don't tell me you forgot. I promised that I would always be there when you needed help. Back when we were kids, remember?"

Without asking for permission he reached for her hands, making her blush. He looked at them closely and sighed.

"What a mess you made."

He then started blowing on all the bruises and blisters that covered her palms. Izumi's blush deepened. His warm breath tickled her very sensitive skin.

"You did... that before," she whispered.

He looked up at her, "Huh?"

I was five when I first started tennis lessons, and back then I hated it. My hands would hurt so much I always ended up crying. One time Hiroki was with me and he did the very same thing. He blew on my hands until the pain went away. That was the moment when I fell in love with him, and those feelings hadn't gone away.

"Are you sure I really did that, Izumi?" he actually looked embarrassed.

"Yes," she nodded, amused at his reaction, "You did."

Then he smiled, "And did the pain go away this time too?"

She nodded again.

"Good, because there'll be no time for pain in the training schedule I've got for you," he picked up the bat. He was about to hand it to her when Izumi placed her head on his shoulder, "Hmm? Izumi?"

"Please," she silently begged, "Let me stay like this for just a minute. Please?"

I remember thinking at that moment that things would finally change for the better. That I would finally have what I always wanted. But then Hiroki said this.

"Izumi," she looked up at him, his face having turned serious, "I want you to understand something. Even though I'm coaching you because that's how much I care, things are going to be different between us from now on. No matter what happens tomorrow, our relationship will change. Are you prepared for that?"

At the time I didn't really understand what he meant. I couldn't possibly imagine that things would be different between us after tomorrow. Had I known what would happen in the next few days I wouldn't have acted so foolishly.

"I am," she said.

"All right," he handed her the bat, "Let's get started then."

For the rest of that night Hiroki relentlessly coached me on how to properly hit a baseball. It was all or nothing at this point. He taught me well. By the time dawn finally broke not only was I hitting the baseball but I was also hitting them deep. I was ready. Nothing would stop me now. It was time to finally put an end to it.

By noon on that day a crowd had gathered to see the final showdown. When I arrived everyone was shocked by my appearance. You would've been too if you had been there. I looked like I had gone through a war. My clothes were all torn and dirty, my body was covered in bruises, and my palms were so battered they were raw and bloody. My classmates later told me that I also had this insane look on my face and I was smiling like a maniac. They even said my eyes looked demonic. It honestly frightened them and they wondered if I had gone insane. Looking back, perhaps I had. After all, what kind of person would push themselves to such lengths?

Thanks to Hiroki's coaching I was absolutely certain I could win this match. I knew my mother was watching. She would now see that I was every bit her daughter and would finally acknowledge me as such.

"Let's play ball!"

Izumi took her batting stance while Ryo positioned herself on the mound, Coach Kido stood behind the catcher to call the balls and strikes.

Both girls looked each in the eye. They could almost hear each other's thoughts.

This is it, Izumi. I'm going to beat you and make you join the team!

This is it! The day I get her out of my life!

An eternity seemed to pass as they continued to stare at each other, then Ryo finally made her windup and the first pitch came.

Izumi watched it come, gritting her teeth as she remembered what Hiroki had taught her.

"Keep your eyes on the ball until you feel the impact!"

She waited until the right moment before she started her swing.

"Once you feel it you explode! Releasing all your strength at the moment of contact!"

By turning my right wrist! she inwardly screamed.

The bat connected with the ball, surprising everyone.

The first ball went foul and the game should've ended right there, for it was an easy out over in right field. Fortunately for me the girl who had been placed in right field was someone who had no athletic ability. She originally came from Okinawa to pursue a modeling career and had only joined the team because she thought it would gain her some publicity. She wouldn't catch the ball out of fear of damaging her face. I was lucky. I had managed to hit the first pitch but it wasn't perfect because I was still angling up.

Izumi was annoyed. She had to do better than that! Stifling a growl she took her stance again. She locked eyes with Ryo again and saw that she was just as surprised that she had been able to hit that pitch. Then she saw her look over at Hiroki, who was standing near the bleachers watching the match very closely.

Inwardly she smirked. The girl must've realized that Hiroki had coached her and she saw a flash of doubt. Good. That will make things much easier.

Looking at her opponent again she moved her bat into position. Ryo made her windup and threw her next pitch.

This time I'll hit with a downswing!

She tightened her grip and began to swing, but as she did pain shot through her hands and up into her arms. Her eyes automatically squeezed shut and she missed the ball completely.

"Strike two!" yelled Coach Kido.

All of a sudden I was two strikes down. It wasn't looking good for me. My strength was about to give out and I could barely stand on my feet, but I refused to back down. I just needed a little longer. I wouldn't give up. I couldn't give up. Not until I destroy the baseball team. Not until I destroyed her. I didn't care about the pain anymore.

"Izumi! You can do it!" someone yelled.

"Destroy the baseball team!" yelled another.

"So, Princess," she heard the baseball coach say rather gleefully, "How does it feel to be one strike away from joining the baseball team?"

"Stop talking to me!" she hissed, "I'm trying to concentrate."

He only laughed and signaled for the game to continue.

Ryo made her next pitch and Izumi swung again, ignoring the pain shooting through her arms and the bat connected with the ball. It flew right to the mound, straight towards Ryo's glove, but Izumi didn't notice. She had already dropped the bat and was sprinting to first base.

"Foul!"

Startled by the sudden call she skidded to a stop and whirled around. She was about to protest when she suddenly spotted where the ball was. Somehow it had landed outside the left foul line.

"It bounced off the rubber and out of bounds!" the coach explained.

Izumi spat in disgust and kicked the dirt. She'd been so close! Reluctantly she returned to the plate and picked up the bat again, but before she could take stance again the catcher called for time and went to the mound.

She must've noticed how wiped out I was. The last pitch had taken a lot out of me. I was short of breath, my wrists were swollen, and my hands were bleeding again. I wasn't going to last much longer. The only thing that was keeping me going at this point was my hatred towards Ryo. I think at that moment she was considering throwing a different pitch since I had already hit her fastball twice but the catcher convinced her otherwise, probably saying that I couldn't make a swing like that again. To the team they thought they had this in the bag, but for Ryo it suddenly placed her in a difficult position. What she did next would forever change my perspective of her.

The next pitch came I was able to hit easily. They didn't have a third baseman because they didn't have enough players, leaving an opening. When the pitch came I hit in that direction and took off for first base. Their shortstop was able to get to the ball before it went into the outfield and she threw a strike at first. With the last of my strength I dove for it. My hand landed on the bag right before the baseball smacked the first baseman's glove.

I was called safe.

I had done it.

I had won.

I had beaten her.

The last thing I remember was looking over to the mound, expecting to see Ryo's shocked and devastated face. Instead she was looking at me with eyes filled with sadness, and I could've sworn I heard her say, "I'm sorry...".

I finally passed out after that. I woke up in the hospital two days later. Despite the beating I had put my body through I was fine and would recover right away. Even my hands weren't as damaged as my coach had feared, although he was really upset with me and he gave me quite an earful later on. When I woke up the first thing that entered my mind was what had happened to the baseball team. Was it dissolved? What was my mother doing in the meantime? Would she finally acknowledge me? To my surprise she came to see me, and I would learn a lot more than I thought I would.

Izumi saw her silhouette through the curtain before she heard her voice. Her mother thanked the nurse for bringing her over to her room and the nurse left. She saw her stand behind the curtain, as though she was debating if she should really see her or not.

Why was she here? Had she come to beg Izumi to not dissolve the baseball team?

Had Izumi not been lying in bed she would've gladly welcomed the challenge, but she was too tired and she was honestly not in the mood for an argument. Her mother had lost and that was it. When she saw approaching she closed her eyes and pretended to be asleep.

For a while there was only silence, but she knew her mother was there watching her. Slowly, step by step, she approached. Izumi kept herself from frowning while fighting to keep her eyes closed. Why was her she just standing there? What was she waiting for?

Then something unexpected happened. Her mother took her bandaged hand in hers and squeezed gently.

"Izumi... I'm sorry," she whispered.

She felt her heart skip a beat. Did she hear correctly? Did her mother just apologize? For what? Everything?

"You were right," she heard her say, "You were right about everything."

Unable to take it Izumi was about to open her eyes when someone else came into the room.

"Ah, you're here," her mother sounded relieved.

"Hi, Honey," said a male voice.

Izumi's breath hitched.

Dad.

What was he doing here?

"You finally made it."

"I didn't get your message until after I got back from Korea, otherwise I would've been here sooner," Izumi heard him approach, "Looks like I didn't make it in time. How is she?"

"Doctors say she'll make a full recovery," her mother sighed, "but I don't think she'll ever be the same again."

She released her hand as her father stepped closer. Then she felt his hand caress her brow.

"She really did a number on herself, didn't she?" he sighed, "Oh, Izumi. Why do you always have to go to the extreme?"

Somebody started crying and her father moved away. Izumi finally opened her eyes and slowly turned her head. Her mother was behind the curtain again sitting in a chair with her father standing beside her. It was clear that she was crying. Her heart suddenly went out to her. She had never seen her cry before.

"Keiko?" her father gently laid a hand on his wife's shoulder.

"It's all my fault," she sobbed.

"Keiko-"

"Don't try to tell me that it wasn't. This happened because of my selfishness. Look what it caused. Look at what it did to Izumi. Her hands were bleeding! What if she cannot hold a racket again? What if she can never play tennis again?" she sobbed again, "If that were to happen I know she would never forgive me. I'd never be able to forgive myself either, knowing that I ruined her entire life because of my selfish desires. Worst of all... I'd deserve it."

Her husband let her cry for as long as she needed to before saying "Keiko... I just want to ask one thing. Why couldn't you have just explained to Izumi about your past with Hayakawa's father?"

Izumi heard herself gasped. He knew all along?

Of course he would, she suddenly realized.

Of course her would know. He knew far more about her mother than she did. Before she was even born. Why hadn't she thought about asking him before?

"Do you really think it would've made a difference?" she heard her mother say.

"No, but it might've helped her understand things better. Your sons know you better than she does, and that's only because I told them when they were old enough to understand. Izumi is fifteen now. She's a big girl and she loves you very much. She could've handled it if you explained it properly. Why couldn't you tell her? What were you so scared of? Why is it so hard for you to be honest with anyone? Why can't you open up? Just for once?"

A long time passed before Keiko finally answered.

"Because... I'm just not strong enough to be honest," she started crying again, "I fear that... if I start being honest, about anything, I'll fall apart. I'll shatter. There'll be nothing left of me."

That was why I wasn't surprised by your answer, Yotsuba. You said exactly what she did. I couldn't have been more shocked. I had never heard her speak like that before. It was as if she had stripped away every barrier, every piece of armor, and any other kind of protection from her. I was now seeing the real her.

Her mother sniffed several times, "I haven't been the same ever since the day Hidehiko left me behind."

"I know," said her father, "That's why he asked me to look after you."

She suddenly stopped crying and looked at her husband, "What?"

"I never told you this Keiko but I actually saw him that day when he lost the appeal."

Appeal? Izumi was now listening very closely.

"I went straight to his place after I found out the news. He was just coming out the door when I arrived, carrying nothing but a sack over his shoulder," she saw him shake his head, "His apartment was completely bare. He had sold everything off in order to fight for his innocence, only to lose it all in the end. The only thing that was left was a telephone. It was ringing when I got there and he spent a long time looking at it."

There was a long pause.

"That would've been me," said her mother, "I called him right after I saw the news myself."

Her father nodded, "He knew it was you. I tried telling him he should answer it but he wouldn't. He then told me to take good care of you. He knew about my feelings for you."

After a while Keiko's face fell into her hands again.

"Why did he leave me behind? I know he wanted to protect me but I was sincere when I told him that I would go with him if he lost."

"Yes, he knew that, but that's why he did it."

"But why? To this day I haven't been able to figure out why. Did he not trust me?"

"It wasn't that, Keiko. It's..." he sighed again, "I asked him the very same question that day, and he told me that he didn't want to risk losing you the same way he lost his mother. You see, she became pregnant with him when she was still in high school and her parents threw her out right after they found out. From there she had to manage on her own in order to raise him. She had to do things she wasn't proud of and it took a heavy toll on her. On top of that, he grew up in a real rough neighborhood. When he was fourteen his mother was murdered by a group of thugs. He was only able to pursue his baseball career because of the promise he made to her."

Silence enclosed the room for a while.

"You mean... he did it because he was afraid of something similar happening to me?" said Keiko.

He nodded, "He was afraid that if something were to happen to you he'd never be able to forgive himself. He loved you that much, Keiko."

It was now starting to become clear. My mother had loved Ryo's father so much that she was willing to give up everything for him, but never got the chance.

"I... I understand all that," her mother said, "but couldn't he at least given me a chance?"

"You have to understand where he was coming from, Keiko. You grew up in a life of luxury while his was nothing but a constant struggle. You've never had to work a day in your life while he had to work for every yen he made. You've never gone through hardship like he did. You've never even seen the horrors he saw when he was growing up. If you had gone with him your parents would've disowned you, and if something happened to him what would you do? You'd be all by yourself in a dangerous world. He just wasn't going to take that risk. Believe me, it wasn't easy for him to leave you behind, but he had to in order to protect you. Again, that was how much he loved you, Keiko."

Izumi could almost the emotions rolling throughout her mother's body. She watched as she went lax, as though a great burden had finally been lifted from her shoulders.

"I wish I could've seen one last time. If we couldn't be together I would've liked to have been able to say goodbye."

Her father nodded, "He felt the same way, but your parents wouldn't have allowed it."

She started crying again, "Why did it have to happen? He only wanted to do what he loved, what he worked so hard for, and it was all destroyed because of greed and jealousy."

"Sometimes bad things just happen. There's nothing you can really do about it."

"But it was so unfair! He had everything he wanted. He never wanted anything else. He never did anything wrong, and yet he was treated like a criminal. He was never even given the chance to defend himself!"

"I know, and trust me, you weren't the only one. A lot of people said the same thing. At least his name was cleared years later."

Her mother snorted, "Yes, but by the time he had already disappeared. All they could do was apologize for their mistake. To this day I've never forgiven them for what they did to Hidehiko. It was such a sad end to such a great man. He should've been given a second chance."

Izumi stared in amazement. She had never seen her mother this angry before.

"At least he was able to find some peace in his life," her father rubbed his wife's shoulder.

"Yes," her mother agreed with sniff, "That's the only thing I can be grateful for. I'll never forget that day when I saw him again after so many years, playing catch with his daughter."

So that's how she found out, Izumi hadn't even wondered how her mother came across Hayakawa.

"On one hand I was happy that he had found happiness after what he went through, but it still hurt to know that I could never speak to him again."

"Why didn't you? Just to say goodbye?"

She hesitated, "I did think about it, but decided not to. I thought it was better that I didn't disrupt his life," she sighed deeply, "I wonder if he ever thought about me."

"I'm sure he did. You meant a great deal to him."

"But then he died and..." she sobbed again, "You remember what happened when I learned of his death.

"I do, you just collapsed and went into shock. You wouldn't wake up. It was like you were willing yourself to die because you didn't want to deal with the grief."

"And it was Izumi who brought me back. Her voice reached me when no one else did."

Izumi gasped again, remembering that day.

When I was five my mother had suddenly fallen ill and was bedridden. The doctors told us that physically she was fine. It was her mental condition that was preventing from waking up. At the time I didn't understand any of it. The only thing on my mind was that I didn't want to lose her. I went into her room, climbed onto her bed started yelling, screaming, and even cried. I kept begging her not to die. I kept saying that we needed her, that I needed her. I eventually wore myself out and fell asleep. When I woke up I found she was looking at me with a huge smile on her face. At first I thought I was dreaming, but by some miracle she came back to us. I didn't know the real reason until that day.

"If it wasn't for her I wouldn't be here," she sniffed again, "And yet this is how I repay her. No matter what I do, even when I try not to, I just keep hurting her. Why is it always like this?"

"Because the two of you are so much alike it's actually scary. You have to have things your own way."

It was true. Both of us hated it when things didn't go the way we expected it to. I never realized it until my father mentioned it.

"She was right when she said that I was a coward and how ashamed she was that I was her mother."

"Keiko, I'm sure she didn't really mean it."

"I know, but it's true. My selfishness has finally caught up with me and Izumi ended up paying the price. All for a stupid baseball team."

A while passed before her father asked, "Why was the baseball team so important to you? Was it really because you wanted to see his daughter go to Koshien?"

"Yes, but there were other reasons. Part of it was because I wanted revenge, for the life that was stolen from me and for the injustice that was done to Hidehiko. The other reason, the most important one, was because... it was the only way for me to finally put the past behind me. Now I might never be able to."

"Mother..." Izumi felt her eyes burn.

"I know, it sounds pathetic, but I can't help it. It was all I had left."

"Have you dissolved the team?"

"Not yet. I came here hoping to convince Izumi to change her mind, but maybe I should dissolve it anyway. Maybe I should resign as well."

Her father gave a little chuckle, "You're just going to give up? Just like that? That's not the Keiko I know."

Izumi found herself grinning, remembering how Hiroiki had said the same thing.

"It's not worth it anymore. All it's done is cause trouble. From the school to my family. Then there's also Hiroki. He may very well lose his career after what happened yesterday."

Her grin immediately disappeared. Wait, what had happened to Hiroki?!

"What about those girls?" her father then said, "What are they supposed to do once the team is dissolved and their scholarships are cancelled? Do they just go home and spend the rest of their lives wondering how far they might have gone? Some of them have nothing to go back to. Are you really going to let it all end here?"

After a while her mother asked, "What should I do?"

"Simple. Talk to Izumi and tell her the truth. Then do the same with the team, especially with Hidehiko's daughter. I think she deserves to know as well. After that, let them decide what the future of the baseball team should be."

My father came to see me again later that day, along with Coach Kido. From there I was in for a few surprises.

The first came from Coach Kido. He told me that after I had passed out Ryo had walked right up and slapped him, accusing him of using her as a way to make me join the team before she ran away crying. He came to see me after realizing what he had done and apologized. He thought that I was wasting my talent by playing tennis and felt I should join the baseball team instead. To be fair I would've made a good batter had I taken up baseball, but that was for me to decide. Instead he took matters into his own hands by setting up the match between me and Ryo, a gamble that didn't pay off. He then told me that he had once been a close friend of Ryo's father and had been his catcher during high school. He was ashamed of himself for manipulating the daughter of the man he highly respected. Despite his questionable reputation, I was glad that he was able to come clean.

Father then told me what happened to Hiroki. He had gotten into a fight with one of his teammates after he accused him of letting the match proceed instead of stopping it. The guy was someone who'd always been jealous of Hiroki's popularity and he saw it as an opportunity to bring him down by portraying him as a heartless jerk. He went as far as saying that Hiroki let the whole thing happen because he couldn't decide which girl would do a better job of keeping his bed warm at night. That's when Hiroki lost control. He beat the guy unconscious, breaking both her nose and his jaw. He was suspended both from school and the team and was in danger of being expelled. The Board was keeping it quiet in order to avoid a scandal. If word had got out not only would the schools' reputation be damaged but Hiroki would lose both his scholarship and his career.

Finally, I asked my father to tell me the whole story about my mother and her relationship with Ryo's father. It turned out that they were actually engaged. At the peak of his career he was about to marry my mother when a scandal broke out. He was accused of throwing a game for money when a bag filled with cash was found in his locker. It wasn't until years later, after he had disappeared, that it was revealed that some of his teammates had planted the bag because they were jealous of him and wanted him gone so they could take the spotlight for themselves. Coach Kido told me that Ryo's father loved the sport of baseball and would never throw a game for money, but the team he played for didn't want their reputation soiled so they sacrificed him in order to protect their image. In the end he lost everything. His whole career was destroyed because of jealousy, just as my mother said. She was forced to break off her engagement with him. She decided she was going to elope with him if he had lost the appeal, but he left her behind in order to protect her. My father told me that she had never really recovered from that. She'd been living with a broken heart all this time.

I now finally understood why she became this way and why the baseball team was so important to her. But then came my biggest surprise when I was released from the hospital the next day.

Izumi found Hiroki waiting for her at the hospital entrance late in the afternoon. Most of her bruises were gone and her body no longer ached. However, she had to keep the bandages for her hands on for the next few days because they were still healing.

"Hey," she smiled as she came to him.

"Hey," he smiled back.

She immediately noticed the bruise on his chin.

"So you really did get into a fight," she placed her hands on her hips and glared at him.

"Oh," he chuckled nervously, "You heard about that, huh?"

She sighed, "Hiroki-"

"I know what you're gonna say. I shouldn't have done that. I also know that my entire baseball career might be in jeopardy, but I wasn't going to sit back and do nothing while that jerk insulted both you and... Hayakawa."

She sensed his concern as they started walking together, back toward school.

"Did anything else happen after I passed out?" she asked, "I know Hayakawa got upset with the coach before running off."

"Well, the baseball team hasn't been dissolved. They haven't received any news lately so they're just sitting around anxiously waiting. As for Hayakawa... she hasn't been to school since that day."

She stopped, "She hasn't?"

He shook his head, "I actually tried to visit her today but her mom told me she wasn't feeling well. I haven't seen her since then."

Silence ensued as Izumi pondered over that. She had set out to destroy the baseball team and make Hayakawa leave, but now she couldn't help but feel sorry for both her mother and the girl.

"You know," she tried to sound cheerful, "I wouldn't have been able to win if it wasn't for your coaching, Hiroki. Thank you."

There was a reply and Izumi stopped when she realized she was walking by herself.

"Izumi..." she heard him saying before she could turn.

Her heart suddenly quickened. She had never speak her name like that before.

"Yes?" she said hopefully.

When he didn't answer she turned. They had entered a park that was built near the lake. He was looking out toward it with unseeing eyes.

"I guess... you didn't notice, did you?" he finally said.

She frowned, "Just what didn't I notice?"

"I should have known," he sighed deeply, "You were too exhausted, weren't you?"

Izumi suddenly remembered the look she saw on Hayakawa's face before she passed out.

"What are you talking about?" she insisted, trying not to sound impatient

Hiroki sat down on a nearby bench and gestured for her to sit beside him.

"Izumi... Hayakawa... let you win on purpose."

The words shocked me. It was the last thing I expected to hear.

"She... She let me win?!" she exclaimed, then her face softened "Oh, I get it. You're joking, right?"

"No," he shook his head, indicating that he was dead serious, "It's not a joke, Izumi."

He looked at the sky as Izumi waited for him to explain.

"When Hayakawa pitches a ball it's over a hundred miles per hour, and that's how she was throwing... at least through the third pitch. But that fourth ball... was a gimme."

She gasped, unable to believe it.

"It was slow, Izumi," he went on, "Well under a hundred miles per hour. A kid could've hit that. And the way she threw it... was right down the center. Slow and lazy, as we say. I knew it the moment she let it go."

I had no reason to think he was lying or making it up. Hiroki was always honest with me, even to a fault. He was a baseball player, he would've noticed.

"You mean..." her voice died.

"That's right," he nodded, "Hayakawa threw that ball to let you win."

"But why would she do that?!" Izumi protested.

"I was asking myself the same question after it was over and... do you recall the guy who was acting as an umpire at first base? He's Hayakawa's closest friend. He's known her since childhood. He told me that he too had noticed the change in her behavior after the catcher spoke with her. He said that there was conflict in her eyes, as though she was struggling with herself. When I mentioned that last pitch to him, he wasn't surprised."

Her eyes widened, "Why's that?"

"Well, he wasn't entirely sure himself, but he believes that Hayakawa let you win because she realized that you were suffering because of her and she couldn't bear it. She couldn't bring herself to defeat you. That's just the kind of person she is, according to him."

Izumi sat there in silence as it finally dawned on her.

In the end I accomplished nothing. That last revelation finally made me realize how foolish I had been. I had tried to take what I wanted by force, but all I did was bring about more suffering for others. It wasn't just my mother but there was also Ryo and all those involved with the baseball team. I had ruined everything because I let my personal feelings get the better of me. My mother was now suffering more than ever before. I realized that I had to make amends for my mistakes. I would then make a decision that would change my life forever.