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Chapter 21

The Meaning of Life

Keiko was all alone in her office looking up at a beautiful full moon.

It was so peaceful to look at the moon like this.

Or it would be, if it wasn't so gloomy.

The office was dark and quiet. It had been for the last three days. Keiko really was considering resigning as chairperson. She had virtually abused her position in order to fulfill her dream, but it was no longer a dream. It had turned into a selfish desire and she had hurt the most important person to her because of it. After everything that happened there just wasn't any point to it anymore.

She had lost.

It was time for her to accept it.

She looked down at her locket, wondering how Hidehiko would've felt if he was here, when she heard the door open behind her. She didn't need to turn to see who it was.

"Well? Are you satisfied now?"

There was no answer, but she knew her daughter was there.

"I've never seen you like that before. It gave me chills up my spine. I never understood... how much you hated me until I watched as you destroyed all those dreams."

Her voice was cracking and she was close to tears, but she wouldn't allow Izumi to see her most vulnerable state. She wouldn't give her that satisfaction.

"I suppose I could beg you to not make me do this, but we both know I won't lower myself to that level."

When she still received no answer she finally turned, hiding a frown. Her daughter was there leaning against the door, her face covered in the shadows.

"What? Didn't you want me to beg?" she went over to her desk, "Well, don't worry. I'm going to let you have what you want. I'll call the Board of Directors right now."

She picked up the phone and dialed.

"The girls baseball team is dissolved," she announced, "The scholarships will be canceled."

The phone rang a few times before the line went dead and went back to the dial tone. Keiko turned to see Izumi standing there with her finger on the switch.

"Now what?"

"Put the phone down," she whispered, "Please."

She raised a brow, but did what she asked. Then, before she could say anything else, Izumi came over and hugged her. Tightly.

"Izumi?" she stood there stunned as her daughter buried her face into her chest and began to cry.

"I'm sorry... I didn't know. I didn't understand."

"Izumi... what-"

"I heard you and Dad talking. At the hospital."

Her breath caught, "You... were awake?"

"I was. He told me the whole story," she sobbed, "I didn't realize how much you've been suffering this whole time, and I just went and made it worse because I was only thinking about myself. I'm so sorry, Mother. I'm sorry for everything!"

She continued to cry as Keiko stared down at her. Then she finally let go and did what she should have done a long time ago. She wrapped her arms around her daughter and held her tightly.

"Izumi..." she whispered as her own tears came, "You have nothing to be sorry for. If anyone should be sorry, it's me. I completely let you down as your mother."

She ran her hand over the girl's thick ringlets, remembering all those times when she would come home after tennis practice on the verge of tears because her hands and arms were hurting so much yet doing her best to hide it. She smiled and said what she should have said many times before.

"I've always loved you, Izumi, and I've always been proud of you. You've put with me all these years and yet you never left my side. I just wasn't able to show it because I was so caught up in the past. I felt that..." she sniffed, "if I said it to you before you wouldn't believe me. It would've felt like a lie."

"I probably would," Izumi whispered back, "What happened to you was so unfair. All you wanted was to spend the rest of your life with the man you loved and he was cruelly taken away from you, and when he died you took it badly. I was so scared of losing you that time."

"But it was you who gave me a reason to go on," she sniffed again, "and I've done nothing but treat you poorly ever since then."

"You were right. I was too young to understand. I've never gone through the kind of pain you have. I had no right to speak to you that way or to say those things."

"No," Keiko released and took her by the shoulders, lifting her chin so she could look into her eyes, "What you said needed to be said. You were right, I've been a coward all these years because I wasn't able to let the past go. Deep down I've known it all along but it was you who finally made me realize it," her voice finally cracked, "Wh-When... When I saw your hands bleeding, when I saw how battered you were at the hospital, it hurt me more than anything. I felt as though I had done that to you. I don't want to see anything like that ever again."

"No," Izumi shook her head, "what you wanted was to honor the memory of the man you loved, to correct the injustice. If I had been in your shoes I would've done the same," she then smiled with all the love in her eyes, "I guess we're just not good at being honest about anything, huh? Dad was right. We have to have everything our own way."

Keiko laughed and pulled her daughter into her arms again, kissing her forehead.

"You're my flesh and blood, Izumi," she said with all the love she had, "You will always be my daughter. Nothing will ever change that."

"Thank you," Izumi tightened her embrace.

After a while they pulled apart.

"So... what happens now?" Keiko asked, "Do you still want the baseball team dissolved?"

"No," Izumi shook her head again, "I understand now why it's so important to you. It also wouldn't be fair to those girls who worked so hard to get where they are."

"Very well, if that's what you wish," she was grateful that she wouldn't have to do it after all, "They're still short one player. You could still join if you want."

Izumi shook her head, "I can't. Even if I had to I'd be joining for the wrong reasons."

Keiko looked at her curiously, "Because of Hiroki and his relationship with Hayakawa?"

"That, and among other things," then her daughter grinned, "But don't worry, I've done a little favor for them."

Keiko blinked in surprise, "You have?"

"You'll see tomorrow," Izumi eyes then turned serious, "More importantly, I agree with Dad that you should tell Hayakawa about you and her father. She deserves to know. I think you should tell the whole team too. You should do it right away because... someone else is bound to find out about her father's past. They'll undoubtedly use it as a way to destroy the team."

Keiko froze. She hadn't thought of that.

"You're right," she bobbed her head, "Yes, I'll do that first thing tomorrow after school is over."

After a moment Izumi said, "There's one more thing I need to talk to you about. I've been talking with Dad and... I've come to a decision."

I decided to transfer to another school. I came to realize that there was nothing for me there at Kisaragi. I had only gone to that school because it was owned by my family, but it was also because Hiroki was there. I couldn't have what I wanted because of things that were beyond my control. My mother's past was something she had to deal with on her own. There was nothing I could do to help her, but we had faith that she would return to us one day once her dream was fulfilled and she was finally able to put the past behind her. That was more than enough for me. Staying at Kisaragi would serve no purpose and I had to pursue my own path in life.

I also came to accept that Hiroki really did have feelings for Ryo. He did his best to hide it but I knew. I also knew that he would've been sad if he wasn't able to see her again and I couldn't bring myself to see him like that. The same went for the baseball team. Those girls had worked so hard to get where they were and it wasn't right to have it end before they actually got started. I couldn't join the team because if I had it would've been for selfish reasons. I would've just used it as an excuse to remain close to Hiroki and treat Ryo as my rival. That wasn't the kind of person I was and I had nearly turned into that.

I did, however, do them one last favor. While I was in the hospital an old friend of mine came to see me. She was a huge baseball fan and had played the sport herself. More importantly, she was also a powerful hitter. When I mentioned the baseball team to her she immediately became interesting and at my suggestion she instantly transferred schools and joined the team. They couldn't have been more grateful, for she was exactly what they needed. They were able to win their very first game thanks to her. The Kisaragi Nine did make it to Koshien over time. They never won the championship, but it was more than enough for my mother. All she wanted was to see Ryo stand on the same mound her father did many years ago.

The next day, at my request, a student gathering was called and I made my announcement. My father had arranged for me to transfer to Kurobara and I would leave Kisaragi on that very same day. Naturally the students were shocked, but before they could start making any accusations I quickly silenced them by taking responsibility for the previous events and stating that what happened was a personal matter between me and my mother that resulted in me taking it out on the baseball team. I also told them that it was time for them to start supporting Ryo and her team. I also made it clear that if they gave them any trouble I would know. Ryo still wasn't at school at the time I made my announcement, but the moment she was informed about my transfer she immediately rushed over.

"Izumi!"

She was just about to step inside her father's vehicle when she heard her voice. She looked over to see Ryo jumped off Hiroki's bike. She'd been hoping to see him one last time just to say goodbye, but she hadn't expected him to come all the way here. She hadn't expected him to bring Ryo either, but she was grateful. She originally intended to visit her place. Hiroki had unknowingly saved her the trouble.

"Izumi!" the girl rushed over to her, "Is it true? Are you really transferring?"

She nodded, "I am."

"But-But why?" Ryo gasped for breath, "Why would you want to transfer to school? Is it... is it because of me?"

Izumi immediately felt sorry for her. Obviously she felt responsible.

"It wasn't you," she said.

"Then why? I... I really don't want you to leave."

Her innocent eyes and the tenderness in her voice tugged at Izumi's heart, but she kept her composure.

"Before I answer that there's something I've been wanting to ask you. Why did you let me win?"

Ryo blinked, obviously taken by surprise.

"Please don't try to deny it. Hiroki saw the way you threw that last pitch and your friend told him that you did it out of kindness. I just want to know why."

Time passed as Ryo struggled to find words. Then her shoulders fell.

"Because... I realized that you were suffering. Because of me," she answered, "When I saw the way you were after you arrived I was just shocked as everyone else, and then when our catcher told me just how bad your condition really was the only I could think of was... why? Why would you do this to yourself? Why would you go to such lengths? At first I thought it was because of my relationship with Takasugi, but then I remembered the locket. Something about it drove you over the edge. I still don't know why you have a picture of my dad."

"The locket actually belongs to my mother."

Her eyes shot up to hers, "Your mother?"

"She'll explain everything to you after school," she paused, "I would... appreciate it if you keep an eye on her."

Ryo blinked again, "Why?"

"You'll understand once she tells you."

An awkward moment of silence passed before Ryo looked away.

"That wasn't the only reason."

Izumi raised a brow, "It wasn't?"

The girl swallowed, "The other reason was... I realized that I was forcing you to give up your dream of tennis in order to fulfill my dream of baseball. It's the reason why I got so upset with the coach. I couldn't do it. If I had... I would have done something horrible and you would've hated me even more. Worst of all I would've deserved it. I would've felt guilty about it forever. I couldn't do it because... that's not the kind person I am."

She finally started crying.

"Now you're going away. I feel like I took everything from you just because I existed."

That was the moment I realized just how beautiful of a person she really was. I really came to admire her then, and I still do now.

Izumi came over and toke her in her arms.

"You didn't," she said tenderly, "You've done nothing to be ashamed of, Ryo. It's actually the other way around. What happened was actually a personal matter between me and my mother. It had nothing to do with you. I just used you as a way to take my anger out against my mother."

"But-"

"You actually did me a favor in coming here. Thanks to you I was finally able to let out all the frustration I've been carrying for years," she drew back and gave Ryo a warm smile, "You really are a wonderful person, Ryo. I wish I could be more like you. I can see now why Hiroki fell for you. Had things been different, we could've been friends."

Ryo stared at her, lost for words. Izumi reached up and wiped her eyes.

"Please, don't cry. It doesn't suit you. I'm leaving because I need to follow my own path in life, to fulfill my own dreams of becoming a professional tennis player, and I can't do that here."

"But... I still don't want you to leave."

Her smile deepened, "I know, but I have to. Once my mother talks to you you'll understand."

She glanced over at her childhood friend, who looked just as sad to see her go, although he did his best to hide it. She almost chuckled. Hiroki never was any good at hiding his more vulnerable emotions. She would miss him, as she would Ryo, but she would see them again someday.

"Can you do me one other favor?" she asked Ryo.

"W-What's that?" she wiped her eyes.

"Keep an eye of Hiroki for me," she grinned, "He's a good man, but he does have an ego that tends to get the better of him."

Hiroki's face turned into a scowl, "Hey!"

"What? You know it's true."

Ryo started laughing and stepped out of Izumi's arms, "Really?"

"Really," she grinned at him again, "It's gotten him trouble before so make sure you're around to knock him on the head whenever he gets a little too full of himself."

Hiroki snorted but said nothing.

"Oh! And his favorite food happens to be Basashi by the way."

"Hey!" this time Hiroki flushed with embarrassment.

"Basashi?" Ryo was confused.

Izumi motioned her closer and whispered into her ear. Her eyes went wide and she stared at her with a mixture of disbelief and horror.

"You're serious?"

"As a heart attack," Izumi was now struggling not to laugh.

Ryo turned to the baseball star "You eat horse meat? Raw horse meat?"

Hiroki just glared at his childhood friend, "You didn't need to tell her that."

"Why not? She'll be making you Bento someday," Izumi pointed out, "She might as well know ahead of time."

He opened his mouth to protest but thought better of it and shook his head.

"He also likes hot pot," Izumi then told Ryo, "Particularly Motsunabe."

"Izumi," he father called from inside the car, "We need to go."

"Just a minute, Dad," Izumi went over to Hiroki, leaned up, and kissed him on the cheek, "That's for gratitude and for luck. I hope you make it to the Major Leagues, Hiroki."

He smiled, "Count on it."

"And you better be good to Ryo," she gestured to her, "If you ever hurt her I'll never let you forget it."

He laughed, "Yeah, I know."

She smiled at him one last time and gave him a hug, "Thank you for always being there to help me."

"And I always will be," he hugged her back, "Whenever you need it."

Izumi went back over to Ryo and they hugged each other one last time.

"Good luck with the baseball team," she said, "You'll have to crawl your way there, but I know you girls will go far. Don't worry about the other students. I made it clear to them that if they ever gave you any trouble, I'll know. You just promise me that you'll give it your very best, even if you have to go up against Hiroki and his team."

"I will," Ryo promised, then grinned, "You know, personally I would've liked to have you on the team. I think you would've made an amazing baseball player, and a powerful batter."

Izumi laughed, "Thank you. I'm honored you think that way."

"Good luck with your tennis career, Izumi. I hope you make it to the top."

She grinned, "Count on it."

Izumi squeeze her shoulder and released her. She stepped inside the car and the driver closed the door. When the vehicle started moving she waved at them one last time. Hiroki and Ryo waved until the car was out of sight.

Not long after I started going to Kurobara I received a letter from Ryo, telling me about the team and what was happening at Kisaragi before asking how I was doing at Kurobara. I was completely taken by surprise when I received that first letter, yet I was also deeply touched. In return I wrote a letter back to her, telling her about the tennis team I had joined. From there we continued to exchange letters all throughout high school. In years following we became close friends. I was her bridesmaid when she and Hiroki got married, and I'm virtually godmother to their children. Our friendship remained strong to this very day.

Yotsuba sat there in silence as Izumi reached the end of her story.

"When I arrived at Kurobara the students there were really taken by surprise, for they had all heard about me," Izumi-san grinned, "And can you guess who the very first person who spoke to me was?"

The fourth quint didn't have to.

"Mama?"

"That's right. She just came up and started talking to me as though we had known each other all our lives," she smiled fondly, "It was thanks to her that I was able to... soften quite a bit. Before I was always tense and took everything seriously, but after I met her I became more calm, patient, and most of all... happy. I was also able to make friends for the first time by joining the tennis team at Kurobara. Those were the best days of my life, as it was for all of us. Thanks to your mother I was able to enjoy my life, to take it as it was and not demand for anything more. I wouldn't have gotten to where I was if it wasn't for her. She truly made an impact in our lives. It was unfortunate that she died so soon."

After a while Izumi sat down next to Yotsuba and looked into her eyes.

"Now the reason why I'm telling you this is because I don't want you to think that you're the only one who's had problems in their life. I also don't want you to think that you're unique because of the problems you had. Every one of us on this Earth has had some kind of problem with our loved ones, be it our parents, our siblings, or even our friends and spouses. I was no different, and neither are you. So don't try to tell me that I have no idea of what you've gone through. I do know, because I've gone through. I've been there. I know what it's like to feel left out, unappreciated, and not respected. It happens, even when those around you don't mean to. That's why we have to communicate with each other. If we don't talk to someone about our problems bad things will happen. You know that now, don't you?"

She nodded.

"The thing we have in common is that we have to have everything our own way. Fuutarou became that way too after his mother died. My mother was also like that, but there was one big difference between her and us. She formed the baseball to honor the memory of the man she loved and to also finally put the past to rest. For her it was the only way she could finally let go of the pain she had been carrying for so long. Granted, she could've been more open about it but it was something she needed to deal with on her own. I nearly took that away for selfish reasons. I wanted my mother's love, yet I already had it. I just didn't see it until then. I also wanted Hiroki all to myself, but then I realized that I couldn't force him to accept my feelings. I had to think about his happiness and not just my own. Once I knew what his true feelings were I had to let him go, because in the end I too wanted him to be happy."

Yotsuba remembered what Nino had said to Ichika when she had talked to her.

I want him to be happy.

She understood Nino's feelings now. Despite all the trouble she gave him Nino truly cared for Fuutarou, while the rest of them... never really did. It was just Fuutarou's dad had said. They simply stopped caring about Fuutarou's own feelings and got selfish. Then they started openly defying their stepfather. What was worse was that Nino had been willing to give up her feelings for the sake of Fuutarou's happiness, but not for Yotsuba. Her betrayal had run too deep.

It was now very clear. Despite all her faults, Nino was truly a wonderful person. She was as kind as she was stubborn, as patient as she was temperamental, as loving as she was emotional. She deserved to be loved and cherished for who she was yet fate kept playing cruel tricks on her. This time she had caused it, and that hurt more than the previous times.

"I guess... what you're trying to tell me... is that I can't have everything," she said aloud.

"No, you cannot," said Izumi-san, "The thing about life is that you have to be content with what it gives you. You can't just take everything you want just because you think you deserve it. People who act that way are never satisfied. They always want more."

Everything we have you want.

Yotsuba remembered Itsuki's words. It was never enough for her. She always wanted more.

"Is there any hope for me and Fuutarou?" she suddenly asked without thinking.

"You know how his mother's death affected him, right?"

"I do now."

"Well, the key to any relationship is not giving them what they want, but by giving what they need. In Fuutarou's case, he needs someone who not only loves him but can help get through the darkness he's been in since his mother died, and frankly Yotsuba, I don't think you're capable of doing that. Not with the way you two are now."

She raised her brows, "Why do you say that?"

"Because it wasn't Fuutarou himself you were in love with, remember? You were in love with a fantasized version of him, one that you had created. You saw him, worshiped him, as your hero and he turned out to be the exact opposite. You only have yourself to blame for that. You learned the hard way."

Yeah, I did, she thought.

In all honesty Fuutarou had turned out to be a complete disappointment.

"So there really isn't any hope for us?"

"What happens between you and Fuutarou is for you two to decide," Izumi-san's eyes then turned serious, "You also need to think about Fuutarou's happiness and not just your own, just as I did with Hiroki. More importantly, Yotsuba, what are you going to do with your own life? Have you ever thought about your future? If you and Fuutarou were to get married right away how do you imagine your married life would be? I don't see you getting a job, because why get a job when you have Fuutarou to take care of all your needs? So how would it go? Fuutarou goes out and works late into the night just so you can pay the bills while you sit at home and do nothing but house chores and fool around as much as you want?"

Yotsuba felt herself cringe but she hid it with a shrug.

"What's wrong with being a housewife? I mean, I can cook and clean."

"What about children? Are you capable of raising a kid? Responsibly?"

Yotsuba hesitated and Izumi let out a chuckle.

"I don't mean to sound rude but I for the life of me I cannot imagine you as a housewife. Nino, Miku, and maybe even Itsuki, but you? Not a chance. You're too energetic. You're not the type who can sit still and stay home all day, cooped up in one spot. You're the type who always has to be doing something or going somewhere. Housewives are not only responsible but they know how to take care of themselves. They have to be, in case the worst should happen. You would just leave everything to Fuutarou, because he knows what to do while you do not. If you were to have children how will you raise them? Fuutarou will always be at work, and since you don't know anything about raising a kid I imagine you'll just spoil them and let them do whatever they wish. That's how you were raised after all, and it worked for you. Why do anything different? When your children get into trouble will you discipline them? Teach them something important? Or will you just make excuses like your sisters did with you? How do you expect them to learn if you do nothing but spoil them?"

There was no good answer Yotsuba could give because it was true. She would've done exactly that.

"So you're saying I wouldn't make a good mother?" she said instead.

"No, what I'm saying is that you didn't think any of this through. You never planned that far ahead. Remember when I asked you what your dream was? You said you wanted to be a bride, not a wife or a mother. And no, they are not the same thing. A wife is someone who wants to spend the rest of her life with the man she loves. A mother is someone who wants to have children of her own and to raise a family together with that very same man. A bride is just someone who wants to get married for the sake of it while trying to make it sound romantic, but it's really for financial security. Not because the couple is in love. You would rather have your husband take care of all your needs and not do anything besides keeping his bed warm at night. Is that the kind of bride you want to be? Because that's exactly what your mother hated."

Yotsuba remembered what Miku had said to her. Making your living by lying on your back.

Her mom would've been so ashamed of her. She might not have even spoken to her ever again if she had gone through.

"The thing about marriage is that no one knows how it's going to turn out, not even the couple themselves," Izumi-san went on to say, "Will it be a happy marriage that will last forever or one that ends in a bitter divorce? You seem to think that marriage is the final destination in a relationship. It's not. It's a stepping stone. Otherwise the very word divorce wouldn't exist. Marriages aren't just built on love alone. It requires trust and understanding. Only then can a bond be formed. Only from there can love grow. You didn't trust Fuutarou enoguh to tell him about yourself because you were afraid he would turn you away. You couldn't do the same with your sister because you felt they would take advantage of you. If you can't trust anyone, why should they trust you when all you do is lie and cheat?"

She was right. Yotsuba always did have trouble trusting people because she always believed they were secretly looking down at her. Her distrust of the entire world was her own version of anxiety. Izumi-san then shifted closer and one of her hands in hers. She looked up at the woman who gazed into her eyes.

"Yotsuba, this is your life. Do you really want to throw it all away just to be with Fuutarou? Is it really because you're too afraid to face the outside world?"

Her breath caught. Normally she would've run away the instant she was asked a question like this, like she had with Itsuki. But now there was no running away. Izumi-san had a tight hold on her.

"It's alright to be afraid," she told her, "It's only natural. It's part of what makes us human. There isn't a single person who wasn't afraid in their lives. Anyone who tells you otherwise is a liar. I myself was afraid."

"You were?" that surprised her, "What were you afraid of?"

"How would my tennis career go?"

Now she frowned, "Why would you think that? I mean, you were one of Japan's best players."

"In Japan I was one of the best, but how would I do on the Tour?" Izumi-san chuckled, "When I went pro I entered an entirely different world. I was now competing against the most talented players in the world from every corner of the planet with tons of experience compared to me. There are some players who are able to find success right away. Others have to crawl their way there. My first few years weren't exactly the best. It was rough, and for a time I began to doubt myself, but I kept at it until I finally found success. After that it became easier. I just kept playing the best I could and took what I could get."

Yotsuba thought back to all those trophies she saw.

"Did you ever get close to winning a Grand Slam?" she asked.

"Once, back in 2012 at the French Open. I was a championship point away when my opponent suddenly made a comeback and took the win. I had it right in the palm of my hand."

"Ouch. That must have been hard."

"It was," Izumi-san said bitterly, "To have come that close only to have it snatched right out of your grasp. That was the hardest loss of my career, and for a while I wasn't able to play like I used to. In fact, it took me a couple years to finally get my game back together. And then..." she looked down and smacked her right leg, "I blew out my knee and that was it."

"I'm really sorry."

"Don't be," she smiled, "Despite the setbacks, I'm happy with how my career went. I played the best I could and gave it all I had. I have no regrets. I'm proud of myself because I was able to do what I set out to do, even if I didn't accomplish everything I wanted."

Yotsuba looked at her before pulling her hand away. She looked out into the distance and sighed.

"I'm actually a little jealous of you right now," she said, "You have something to be proud of, whereas I've got nothing."

"Why do you say that?"

"Because I'm a nobody. I've never accomplished anything in my life."

"That's not true, Yotsuba."

"Yes, it is," she replied angrily, "I mean, what am I really good at? What am I good for? Everyone I know has something going for them. What do I have?"

"You're good at sports," she stated, "That's something to be proud of."

"No, it's not," Yotsuba spat, "I only went into sports because it was the only thing I could do without looking like an idiot. Anyone can play sports."

"But can anyone be an athlete like you? Do you think every athlete only went into sports because they weren't any good at anything else? Well, that may be true for those who came from a poor background, but then there are others who played because they loved the sport and wanted to make a career out of it. Take me for example. I come from a rich family. I had a good education. I didn't have to pursue a sports career, I could've gone into the family business, but I chose to do it because I loved the sport of tennis. You can do the same, Yotsuba, if you really want to. You have amazing athletic abilities. All those trophies you won are proof of that."

"No, they're not," Yotsuba spat again, more bitterly this time, "Those trophies don't mean anything. I didn't set out to win those. I did it so I could feel special and not feel like a loser."

Izumi-san chuckled again, "You keep going back and forth about being special, but what you fail to realize is that you already are special. You know who was the first to realize it? Your mother."

Yotsuba gaped at her, "What do you mean?"

"Do you remember all those soccer games you and your sisters participated when you were little? Remember the one your mother attended? Remember how you always dominated the entire field? So much that even your sisters couldn't keep up with you?"

She frowned, "Yeah, I remember."

"Do you remember how happy she was after it was over? Remember how tightly she hugged you?"

Yotsuba thought back until she remembered that very moment. Then she remembered how tender that moment was.

"Y-Yeah, I do," she almost cried, "Now that I think about it, that was the only time I had ever seen her so happy."

"That's because she saw something in you she never imagined any of her girls would have."

She looked back at Izumi-san in confusion, "I still don't understand what you mean."

The woman's lips rose, "Let me put it this way. The five of you have all inherited something from her. But you, Yotsuba, you inherited the one thing she would've been the most proud of. Her athleticism."

Yotsuba felt her jaw drop, repeating the words again in her mind and trying to make sense of it.

"Yes, she was quite an athlete back then," Izumi-san's smile deepened, "You girls really don't know anything about her when she was young, do you?"

She shook her head, "No, nothing at all. She never talked about it. I don't think we ever asked her. The only thing we have of her is her funeral picture."

"Well, don't worry. That will soon change," Izumi-san quickly got back to the main subject, "The point I'm trying to get at is that you're telling me that your athletic abilities haven't brought you anything. Well, you're wrong. If you really believed that you wouldn't have gotten that athletic scholarship."

Yotsuba was stunned, "Wait, how do you know about that?"

"Before I answer that, do you still have it?"

"Uh, yeah, I do. Not with me. It's in my room, inside my drawer, back at... back at the penthouse."

"I see," Izumi-san nodded approvingly, "That's good. Do you remember what college it came from? It would've been an American one."

Yotsuba had to really think back. She had only looked at that scholarship a couple of times and at most she had only glanced at it.

"Um... I think it was... North Corolla... Chappy Hill..."

She finally shrugged, for that was all she could remember.

"What about the seal?" Izumi-san asked instead, "What color was it?"

She thought back again, "Blue. Light blue."

"In that case it would've been the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill."

Yotsuba stared at her in confusion and her smile deepened yet again.

"I happen to work there, not as a teacher but a volunteer assistant coach for the Women's Tennis Team."

Yotsuba was having trouble processing all this, "I still don't get it."

Izumi-san gave a little laugh. She actually looked like she was having fun, teasing her like this

"Let me fill you in on a little secret, Yotsuba. Right after that soccer game your mother got in touch with me and told me all about you," she gave a delightful giggle, "It had been a long time since I last heard her being that excited. She asked me to keep a close eye on your progress as you grew older. At the time I was still on tour so I had one of my friends do it for me. The point is, when a student athlete is given a scholarship it's because they've been scouted while they're still in high school. How do you think you received yours?"

All at once it dawned on her, "Wait... you sent that scholarship?"

The woman grinned, "Not directly. I had to use a lot of persuasion to convince the school to send you one, but yes. I did. I've watched your progress over the years, Yotsuba. Your athleticism is on a totally different level. Every video I've seen of you never ceases to amaze me. But then you stopped participating in sports like you used to and I couldn't understand why. Part of the reason I had the university send you that scholarship was because I was hoping it would motivate you. Now that I know the real reason it makes things a bit easier."

Before Yotsuba could say anything Izumi-san moved to where she was kneeling before her and she took one of her hands in hers again.

"Yotsuba," she looked into her eyes, "Your mother once had a dream that she never got to fulfill because of a huge mistake she made. Not once, but twice. For many years she didn't associate with me or anyone else because she was too ashamed of herself. She felt that she had let herself down. Did you know that when she was a teacher she was using her mother's maiden name? She didn't want anyone to recognize her. She didn't want to go through the humiliation. She even changed her look. In those early years of your childhood she was very depressed. She suffered so much and she was filled with so many regrets, but then she saw something that brought her great joy. That was you, Yotsuba. Seeing you dominate that soccer game brought her so much happiness. It made her realize that she wasn't a complete failure."

Yotsuba didn't know what to say. She never thought that her mother was so much like her.

"Yotsuba," Izumi-san reached up and touched her cheek, "You have been given a great gift that none of your sisters possess. That is what makes you special. I would hate to see it go to waste, and if she were here she'd be saying the very same thing to you. You say you're not smart enough to do anything else, and that's okay. You don't have to be the smartest person in the world. Your mother wasn't either, but she didn't need to be. All she needed to do was to be herself."

She lifted a finger when Yotsuba started to protest.

"I know what you're going to say. You don't know who you are right now. Don't worry. You'll find out soon enough. But what I can say is that you are an athlete. It may be the only thing that you're good at, but it's better than nothing, Yotsuba, and that means a great deal. I became both an athlete and a tennis player because that's what I wanted to do. You can do the same if you really put your mind to it. You're really going to sit there and tell me that all those sports you participated in, all those trophies you won, weren't proof of your abilities? That it didn't mean anything? Well, I don't believe it."

She said it with enough force that it moved Yotsuba.

"But you know what? It doesn't matter what I believe, because you're the one who has to live with that fear inside you. Afraid that everyone is going to take everything away from you. That you'll be remembered as a coward, that you never amounted to anything. Well, none of that is true, Yotsuba. But it doesn't matter if I tell you this because you're the one who has to deal with it. Stop listening to the voice inside your head that keeps saying, 'You can't do this! You can't do that! Because you can't!'. Start listening to the voice that says, 'You can do this! You can do that! Because you can!'. Because when it's all said and done, and things finally quiet down, it's just going to be you. And you can't go on like this. Your sisters can't go on like this. If you don't at least try, it's going to bother you for the rest of your life. Look at what it's done to you already. Look at what it's done to your sisters."

Yotsuba was a loss for words. Izumi-san was right. She was an athlete. Something she should've been proud of all along but never saw it as such.

"Your mother believed that you were capable of accomplishing great things till the day she died," Izumi-san ran her thumb over her cheek, "I believe you can too. But you, Yotsuba, whatever you decide to do you've got to do it for the right reasons. Not for your mother, not for your sisters, not for Fuutarou, or even me. But for you. Just you and you alone. I can only guide you to the right path in life, Yotsuba, but I can't make you go down it. You have to be the one who decides to take that first step. It's scary, I know, but it's the only way if you want to succeed in life."

Yotsuba slowly digested every one of her words and saw that they all rang true. However...

"I... I understand what you're saying," she said, "And I want to succeed. But... what if I still fail?"

"Then you fail," Izumi-san said firmly, "but at least you won't have any excuses, and you'll be able to walk away knowing that you did your very best and gave it everything you had. That's something I know you can live with."

And at that moment Yotsuba felt a growing sense of confidence without it feeling fake.

"When you return to your sisters, and you will, the first thing I want you to do is to take out that scholarship and take a good look at it. Then I want you to start to seriously think about your future and what you want to do with your life. Forget about Fuutarou for the time being. Focus on yourself. Please, Yotsuba," Izumi-san looked at her with pleading eyes, "This is your life. Do something with it. Don't throw it all away for a selfish desire. This may be your last chance of finding a life of your own and not being dependent on someone. The worst thing that can happen to anyone is when they look at themselves ten, twenty, thirty years from now and realize that they wasted their life away and are filled with nothing but regrets. I don't want to see that happen to you, and it would break your mother's heart if it did. Will you at least promise me that you'll think it over?"

It took some time, but eventually Yotsuba said, "Yes. I promise."

Izumi-san let out a sigh of relief and squeezed her shoulder.

"Well then," she stood and picked up her tennis racket, "I think this break has gone for far too long, don't you think? Shall we continue your tennis lesson?"

Yotsuba laughed and jumped to her feet, "Yes, please!"

Two hours later Izumi called it a day. Yotsuba was disappointed, but she learned so much in just one and was excited to learn more next time.

Izumi was happy to see her eagerness. Yotsuba taking a real interest in something was a good thing for her, but there were still more important matters she had to deal with first before they could go any further.

When Yotsuba asked if they could have another lesson tomorrow Izumi told her it would have to wait for a few days. She was expecting her old friends to arrive tomorrow and she was to fill them in on the current situation. She also told Yotsuba that it would be wise to purchase some tennis gear, including a more modern and lighter tennis racket, and gave her thirty thousand yen for her to use.

Yotsuba tried to refuse the money, saying that it wouldn't be right, but eventually accepted at Izumi's insistence after it was made clear how important it would be if she wanted to continue taking lessons. The girl left in high spirits, but Izumi could tell she was going to have a lot to think about. She had done everything she could, the rest was now up to her. But Izumi had faith. She believed that Rena was watching over her daughter.

Ten minutes after Yotsuba left there was a knock on her door and she opened to find Miyu standing there.

"Hey, did you record it?"

Her friend lifted the bag that carried her camera.

"All of it," she grinned and came inside, "You took quite a long break there. It looked pretty serious. What were you talking about?"

"A lot of times. Important things. About her, myself, Rena, what she needed to hear, and what she needed to do."

"Did she listen?"

"I believe so. We'll just have to wait and see. Have you heard from the others?"

"Yes. I picked up Lita at the airport this morning. She's at my place sleeping off the jet lag right now. My sister will pick up both Ichi-chan and Ninoko at the train station while Yoshi is coming in from Hokkaido with Sushi. They'll all be there tomorrow as promised."

"Good," Izumi smiled fondly, "It'll be nice to see everyone again."

"Yeah," Miyu went to where Rena's picture was and picked it up. She sniffed as the memories came back to her, "I really wish she was here."

Izumi came over and placed an arm on her shoulders, "So do I. We all do."

"Was she interested?" Miyu turned to her with hope in her eyes.

"Definitely," her own eyes gleamed, "But let's not get our hopes up just yet. There's a lot she has to do first."

Yotsuba made her way to the mall to visit the tennis shop Izumi-san. She had also provided of the things she should buy with the money she had given her. She had even told her to keep the black red tennis racket she had used today, saying that it was hers to keep. Yotsuba didn't know what she meant by that, but her mind was occupied by other things.

Izumi-san's story-the story about her when she was teen-it was so much like hers. She too had felt unappreciated and ignored, just like Yotsuba had with her sisters. She too had tried to take what she wanted for herself only to hurt all those around her, just as Yotsuba did. The parallels between them were impossible to ignore. Izumi-san knew exactly what Yotsuba had been going through because she had gone through it herself.

Then there's what Izumi-san had told her about her mother. Had she really been so much like her when she was teen? Had she really been on the verge of making the same mistake Mama had made? Putting her entire future in someone else's hands?

She now felt more guilty than before. She knew what she needed to do now. She had to make up with her sisters and explain to them everything she had learned so far.

A thought suddenly occurred to her. Even if all was forgiven where would things go after that? Even if she and Fuutarou got together again, where would their relationship go once they acknowledged each other for who they really are? Somehow that just didn't seem right. It didn't seem fair that she still got what she wanted in the end. It would feel like nothing would actually be gained. If there was one thing she now knew for certain it was that she and Fuutarou had changed too much. They weren't the same people anymore.

And like Izumi-san had said, Fuutarou needed to discover what his own true feelings were. Yotsuba couldn't force him to accept her feelings, just as Izumi-san couldn't force her feelings on the man she loved when his heart was somewhere else.

From there came an unpleasant thought. What if Fuutarou really didn't have feelings for her? What if he discovered that he really did have feelings for one of her sisters? Perhaps they weren't really suited for each other after all. Nino had always been straightforward with him no matter what while Yotsuba had done the exact opposite. Would Fuutarou himself come to realize that?

Yotsuba waited to see what her inner reaction would be and... nothing happened. She was surprised at herself. Was she really okay with that? Shouldn't she feel sad or even a bit upset? Why did she feel that way?

Then she remembered what Izumi-san said to her. She had to think of Fuutarou's happiness instead of just her own, just as Izumi-san did with her childhood friend. Nino had said that she wanted Fuutarou to be happy and was willing to let him go. There was the possibility Yotsuba had to face as well. Surprisingly that didn't bother her either. She too now wanted Fuutarou to be, just as she did for Nino.

If she and Fuutarou were to part ways in the end what would she do afterwards? Where would she go from here?

A familiar pop snapped her from her thoughts.

She looked around, not recognizing her surroundings. Then she heard the pop again. Along with many more. She also heard the sounds of shoes squeaking and people grunting. She then finally realized she had stumbled across a high school where its tennis teams were in the middle of an intense practice session.

Yotsuba moved closer to get a better look, her eyes riveted to the action before her.

One tall player was hitting powerful balls towards his opponent who was much shorter than him. The shots he was hitting were coming so fast she didn't believe his opponent could return them. But with huge bursts of speed the shorter player was able to catch them in time and return the shot effectively.

She then saw a female player perform a serve and then charged to the net while her opponent remained at the baseline. She was able to hit every ball her opponent struck back at her and eventually score a point, causing her opponent to throw her racket away in disgust.

Yotsuba heard herself chuckle. She probably would've felt the same way.

Two other players were both playing at the net, hitting the ball back at such speeds it was a blur. She saw another hit the ball so gently it barely went over the net. Then there was one who hit the ball very high and she saw the opponent strike the ball back with a smash, something she was very familiar with from her days in badminton.

"Wow," she heard herself say.

"Pretty cool, huh?"

She jumped at the sound of the voice and turned to see a female student standing beside her, wearing a uniform she didn't recognize.

"Uh, yeah," she made herself smile while gesturing to the tennis courts, "They're really going at, aren't they?"

"They have to. The tournament for the National Championship is starting next week. They're one of the top contenders so they've got to get ready."

But Yotsuba wasn't listening. Her attention had returned to the action. As she watched she began to think.

I wish I could do that, then she thought, Can I do that?

Then she heard a voice inside her head. It was a voice she hadn't heard before, yet it seemed very familiar.

Yes, Yotsuba. You can. You can really do that if you really want to.

Author's Note

We have finally reached the end of Act Two. From here on out things will finally start to take a turn for the better. We haven't seen Nino or her thoughts this entire act but that will soon change. In Act Three Fuutarou will change into a better person, the Quints will learn what their mother was like when she was young, and Yotsuba will discover who she is and what she can be. Thank you for all your support so far. Stay tuned for the next one.