Cap in paw.
.
There were three things that Judy learnt when she fell in love with a fox. One was something that was a source of both frustration and joy, the second of deep sadness and longing, the third pure thick-cut prime off the bone schadenfreude.
Nick was always a cheap mammal. It came as no surprise, she reasoned. He'd come from a poor neighbourhood, was raised by a single mother after the death of his father, he ultimately had some self-esteem issues that meant he didn't treat himself. Oh, he treated her very well, and in a way she began insisting that he splashed out on their dates so that he could get something good for himself. Still, his cheapness showed. On one spa day, she remembered asking him about how nice it was as they sat in a hot salt water pool. He said it was very nice, but something he could replicate with a big water barrel, Finnick's van, the ocean, a bath/tub and an immersion heater. He then reasoned that he could scrounge most of those up from a scrap yard, before bringing up his phone to remind himself how much electricity costed and what was the specific heat capacity of water.
He'd promptly been liberated of his original I-carrot phone by an annoyed Judy, who was very annoyed at this point given that she'd been the one to pay for this day. The fox had shrugged, just saying that while he deeply enjoyed it, he also felt that he could recreate a similar experience for a dollar or two, and that Judy didn't have to spend anything on him as her sweetness was good enough by itself. That had earned a combined hug and a punch, leading to long Nick to Nick musing on whether the correct term was a hunch or a pug.
Judy had later wanted to give herself a punch, no hug included, when she finally followed Nick to his place. "How old even is that camper?!"
"Don't be ageist carrots. It works."
Judy wasn't sure if she agreed. She wasn't even sure if it would move. Its paint was chipping, a few of the windows were cracked, she could swear that it belonged in a movie with a cantankerous Dame Maggy Spitz character living in it. And, whatever she said, Nick brushed it off.
"How do you go to the toilet?"
"It's parked over a mammal hole. Direct injection."
"But you have to lift it up."
"Well, it's a manual. It works."
"What about washing yourself?"
"I pay the owner of that store ten bucks a month, and he lets me use his water and electricity. Heck, he even lets me park on that land, spooks loiterers away. That's one-twenty a year. I mean, it's still a bit dear…"
"Dear!? But… ARGHHHH!" She clutched her face in his paws. "Nick, you earn that much in a single shift, and it covers you for a year."
"Eh, used to do better."
"WHAT!?"
"Hey, two-hundred dollars a day, every day, since I was twelve."
He walked on in, taking a few yanks to open up the side door while Judy stood, paws rooted to the floor and nose twitching. "Nick…" she said, her voice a hoarse whisper. "You were seriously about that?"
"Yes. Why?"
"That's one million, four hundred and sixty thousand dollars…"
"Well, no, I don't have that much," he said, rolling his eyes as he began rooting around his cupboards.
"Right."
"Of course right. Taxes on the second ten years for one thing, that reduced the total by about one sixth. Would be more, but blessed be them statutes of limitations. And most of what I got I slipped into stocks and stuff, and I tend to have a good nose for those. So, a bunch of stock in ol' Elon Muskrats car company for a start. I also bought around ten-thousand bark coins when they were a penny each. I sold half of those right at the peak, that was twenty thousand dollar a pop… And the rest are worth half that now, so that's… Hmmm. You're good at multiplying, right?"
"Yes…"
"So that's?"
"One hundred… and fifty… million…"
"Before taxes," Nick said in a sing-song voice as he pulled out some cans. He held them behind him, up at Judy. "Now, can you believe that mammals will chuck this stuff away? Spaghetti hoops, the meal of champions, am I right Carrots?"
…
"Fluff?"
…
"Why are you hitting my van with your head Judy?"
.
.
.
.
Not long after, after insisting he buy an 'overpriced, overspecked, really not that much better than my van' three-million-dollar elite penthouse with three bedrooms, a roof garden, and access to all the communal gardens, facilities and even gym and pool, Judy was settling down nicely into her new relationship. It was still annoying that he'd ultimately only agreed to this as 'a real estate investment', and that the only way to get him to treat himself was for her to do it for him. As per a new agreement, Nick had to spent half a percent of his wealth on himself every year and, if he failed to do that, Judy would spend it for him. That was still close to a million bucks a year, really close to the big seven figures given their combined salaries, and would smash through that ceiling in a few years given how good the rest of his investments were doing.
She was happy, relaxed, complacent…
And so, while chatting with her father, she made a terrible, terrible, terrible mistake.
"You know…" she mumbled, after responding to a question about how she looked so good. "It helps to have a millionaire boyfriend who needs help to spend his money."
"WAIT-WHAT? You're dating a millionaire. Bonnie! Bonnie! Our little girl married a millionaire! The Hopps family is set. Come over here, quickly!" Her mother barged in, her eyes wide.
"What's this about a millionaire?"
Judy sat up and spun around, giving them a wide view of the exquisite apartment. "What do you think?"
"I think I want to meet this mammal?" Stu said, hopping up and down.
"Well, good news for you is you already have."
…
"Uhhh…"
"Ummmm…"
"Oh come on, it's Nick…"
"-WHAT!"
She was taken aback by their shock, but brushed it off. "Yeah, I was pretty surprised too. He's one crazy saver and…"
"Oh no," her father cut her off. "Oh no, no, no!"
The bunny cop blinked a few times. "Uh… Dad? I…"
"You are NOT dating a fox," he yelled, his teeth baring. "No way, nuh-uh, not a chance!"
Judy couldn't believe it. She… But… "Dad, it's… There's nothing wrong with…"
"There's everything wrong with it!" he yelled back. "Tolerating them on business is one thing, but there are sacramental lines and stuff, or has that city over there corrupted you or something?"
"Dad, no-one ever said it was wrong to date a fox," she gasped, her eyes narrowing. "You never told me that…"
"IT DIDN'T NEED TO BE SAID!" he yelled. "It's disgusting, freakish, sick, end of and you can not change our minds!"
"I…" she began, tears beginning to well as her paw shook with anger. "Well you can speak for yourself, but not for the rest of my family. Isn't that right, Mom? Mom…"
It was only then that she saw her mother slumped in the corner, bent over and crying.
"Mom… Mom, please, don't be silly."
"No," Bonnie managed, turning up and looking as if she was about to give a hard scolding. "You stop being silly. Call us back when you've grown up and thought about what you've done." She then reached forward and grabbed the phone, hanging it up.
Judy was left sitting there, shaking.
"Hey Carrots," Nick said, walking in. "Remember those torn jeans of yours? Well, I converted the beyond repair set into some nice new denim shorts, and used the remining denim scraps to pad up them worn through knee areas. And you said they were only good for the trash!"
…
"Fluff? Is this fashion thing really worth getting that emotional about? After all, anything will look good with you in it."
…
"Ooohhh… Thanks for the Pug Judy. Now, ehhh, what's the problem?"
.
According to almost all the Hopps family, Nick was the problem. Sure, he could be barely tolerated as a friend, being a fox, a city mammal, an ex-con mammal and so on. But that was before he dared to date and defile their daughter. Especially before he revealed that he was a master swindler, a conniving stealer, a mix between a cat burglar, mafia boss and Gordon Gecko wannabe all rolled up into one. Oh, there was no way he got that much money without stealing, defrauding and so on. Judy begged and pleaded, but it only made their hatred of Nick harden, for gaslighting and pulling the wool over her eyes. He was everything wrong with foxes and more, a blatant liar and greed magnet who would swindle money as easily and without mercy as he'd swindled their daughters love.
There were those who secretly supported her in the Hopps warren. 'Chief Organiser' Violet Hopps, after thoroughly reviewing the many documents provided, concluded it was all perfectly legitimate. While she still had reservations about the WildeHopps pairing, it was more a clinical concern about the practicalities and emotional toll. Judy assured her though that, at this point, she chose Nick over the rest of her family. Secretly though, she still wished that she could convert the whole other burrow to her side.
It was a fools errand.
They would not budge.
In the end, she was left with a secret fanclub of a dozen bunnies, ranging from Uncle Sammy Sr at the oldest to Little Cotton Hopps at the youngest.
And her fox.
Who she was now planning an all-star wedding for, given that a simple civil registration would not do.
.
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.
.
"No, no, no, no! Why now!"
Stu's words echoed out hard through the warren, even among the heavy beating of hard hailstones and lashings of lightning.
"Stu! Get back in!" Bonnie shouted, running out and grabbing his paw. "Just because the sirens aren't going off, doesn't mean we're going to risk it!"
Many a mammal would be staring out at the base of the supercell, its lowered wall rotating menacingly above them. Looking hard enough, they might even spot the faint wisps on the ground of a tornado trying (and thankfully failing) to form. But Stu, as he was hauled back down, paw reaching out, had his eyes fixed on one thing.
His carrots.
His beautiful, growing, magnificent carrots.
And the fist sized hailstones current smashing down on them.
By the time the storm was over, he was like a lost mammal wandering about. They had been halfway to ready, small enough that they weren't sellable but large enough that time and effort had been put into them. The leaves and stems up top had been smashed in and destroyed, in many cases the larger stones reaching down and hitting the top of the vegetable too and pulping them. Sure, many had survived, but if he waited to harvest all of those at market size, the other half would have long rotted. And, even if getting the entire warren to go around pulling the damaged ones out day and night for home consumption, it would take a month to deal with all the fields.
No.
Out came the tractor, pulling all the small carrots up. The family could have them. They'd sow a new crop in its place.
Elsewhere, the damage was worse. The berries, just coming in, wiped out for the year. Many of the pumpkin and courgette plants pulped up too. Not the gourds themselves, the actual plant they grew from. Again, another replant.
It hit them hard. Very hard. But they could survive for this year, though it would involve a bit of debt.
Next year though, the rains were weak, the crops poor, the family breaking even but the interest on the debt ratcheting up.
The next year was even worse. Oh, the crops came in good, but eighteen years ago Bonnie had had two huge litters near the start and end, and that meant twenty hard working bunny kits going off to higher education. Bonnie and Stu had promised, sworn, that they'd help all their kits and this wasn't something that they'd back down on. Hopps promises were solid as gold, they weren't going to betray them, especially like how Judy had betrayed them! Well, the mechanics were different but it was the principle that counted. They weren't dishonest, shifty, conniving mammals like that fox. Urghhh… Why did it have to be him who was the rich mammal who got their wayward daughters' heart? Any other, and their issues would be solved. They could only hope that she finally came to her senses and returned home with a hefty divorce settlement.
But nothing came of it, other than twenty kits getting big chunks of money and Hopps farms going much more under. A good harvest next year helped, but many of the burrow systems also required major repairs. A small step forward, but the last of them. Compound interest was a harsh mistress, especially paired with the burgeoning numbers of grandkits and even their first great-grandkits, all requiring a greater stock of the farm produce, meaning less to sell.
"We can only go on like this for five more years, Stu," Violet warned one year.
"Four years," she warned the next.
"Three. Listen, maybe you can make up with Nick and Judy and…" Her parents reacted, and she didn't broach the subject for another year.
The next time went pretty similar.
As did the one after that.
"Ten days…" The mood was tense and cold, the whole burrow scared and worried. Violet scowled. "Listen. I've kept in contact with them, they know and they're happy to lend it!"
"Oh yeah?" Stu demanded. "What are his foxy conditions then, huh?"
"You negotiate mammal to mammal."
"You see! Filthy fox. Doesn't even demand I say sorry to my daughter."
"He said that demanding it would be a moot point as you wouldn't mean it."
"I don't mean it and I won't be asking for anything!" he exclaimed. "It's better to fail as honest mammals with your principles than succeed as corrupted ones!"
…
Nine days later, the bunny was grumbling across from his ex-daughter and her husband. The four sets of little fox eyes looking on curiously didn't help one bit.
"Hey, I finally found something I'm happy to spend on," Nick said with a smile, bouncing a little cross-fox vixen on his leg. She looked up and giggled as he bent down and gave a lick on her nose. Bonnie and Stu gave disgusted looks, as he tickle attacked her and let her go. "I mean honestly, lil' hustlers all of them! I can't help but spend criminal amounts on them. Tchhh, it beggars belief. I mean what kind of mammal would want to give Cindy there away? Well, probably the same that'd give Jackie, Oliver and Mike away too. Anyhow, onto business. These are our terms. I think you'll find them both reasonable and non-negotiable."
The two grumbled, looking down, only for Bonnies features to soften.
"As I said," Violet began, walking up. "Perfectly reasonably. Charitable even."
"It's zero interest," Bonnie chimed in, smiling.
"And with my business plans, it should take us five years to pay it off, with a bit of tolerable austerity along the way."
"Just hold up," Stu interrupted, scanning through it. "I know him. What's the catch? There's always a catch, I… A-ha! There! I got you now, Fox! No way, uh-uh, not a chance! In four hours' time, I may not have my farm anymore, but I will have my dignity!"
…
Three hours and fifty-nine minutes later, Stu Hopps' signature was on the document. He had lost his dignity, and his farm.
The next day, new CEO Violet Wilde, along with her fellow trustees (ranging in age from Uncle Sammy Sr to a still underage Cotton Hopps) look on as the sign to 'WildeHopps delicious farm stuff inc.' went up.
Stu Hopps and Bonnie looked at it and sighed, before getting back to work. They had a new harvest to bring in after all, with extra blueberries.