Disclaimer: Still don't own anything. Wish I would./p
Thank you so much to those who read and especially those who took the time to write a review! That really means a lot to me. I wish there was a way to directly answer to the reviews but I could not find one. Maybe someone can tell me if there is a way? I still have trouble finding my way around the page/app. Ten years ago I used to publish on another website and everything was much simpler than now. So I am very sorry if I mess up anything regarding settings or stuff like that.
I'm still very insecure about this story. Nevertheless I would like to continue and see where it may go. I changed the title and the description because now it's not a one shot anymore and the subject will change. At the end of this chapter everyone who didn't skip biology class may get a hint in which direction this story is headed. So if that isn't your thing just know you've been warned.
So – From now on this story will not follow the events of the show. I'll take on a few aspects or inspirations for sure but it will evolve into a very different direction. We start with waking up after Always and forget about how it was and the information we got in the show (though of course, it was absolutely beautiful).
The feeling of soft kisses along his neck slowly pulled him out of his sleep. He exhaled deeply and a soft smile spread over his lips. So he hadn't been dreaming and she also didn't leave like he had feared. And when he could bring himself to open his heavy lids she would be here next to him, touching him. He reached out his hand and his fingertips found the smooth skin of her back. He savored the moment a few seconds longer and then finally opened his eyes.
The room was submerged in the warm light of the sun rising over the city and the atmosphere could not have met his mood any better. The sheets were rumpled all over the bed and in the middle of them, they laid. Kate to his left side, her naked skin feeling soft and warm against his. He looked at her and his heart seemed to pause for a few moments. With her messed up hair, slightly smeared make up, and blushed cheeks as her eyes met his she looked more beautiful than he had ever seen her before. She shyly smiled back at him and whispered a soft „Morning".
„Good morning" he answered and could not bring himself to tear his eyes from her face. He rarely was at a loss for words but in this moment he could not think of anything to say. Luckily for him, Kate replaced the need for words with a kiss as she rose up to him and graced his lips against his. She felt a tickling sensation like electricity waving through her body on kissing him again. He closed his eyes again and let himself sink into the feeling of her being so close to him. He took her in his arms and slightly pulled her on top of him. With her laying partly on her chest he intensified the kiss and his hand found its way into her tangled hair, while the other hand was still caressing her back.
Kate shifted her hips and with a smooth movement, she placed himself on his lap, bowing down to him to kiss him further. He moaned at the sensation of her brushing against his groin. She had to admit she enjoyed him squirming underneath her and couldn't suppress a smile. He could feel her lips curving on his. „Just wait…" he thought and his hands wandered down her back and reached the soft curves of her butt. With a little pressure, he tried to guide her into the direction he was longing for her to go. Just a few inches and… Kate's hips followed his hands and he could feel the dampness between her legs on top of him. He was ready to guide himself into her but she slowly interrupted their kiss and slightly pulled her head away from him. He was confused and opened his eyes, just to see her looking at him, insecurity written on her face. „What's wrong?" he whispered, slightly arching his brows.
She opened her mouth but didn't answer right away. „Dammit" she thought to herself. „You're a grown woman, just say it". She bit her lip, for a second considering to not say anything at all but concluded that probably wasn't a good idea. „Um.. It would be better if we used … protection from now on." It took his blood-deprived brain a few seconds to process what she had just said. As the meaning of her words reached his mind, he rose his eyebrows at her and his whole body froze. He wanted to answer but all that came out of his mouth was a hoarse „Oh". He swallowed and tried again but „Um, you… eh.. You aren't..?" Was the only thing he could get out.
The insecurity still present on her face she answered „Well, no. But it's alright. It would just be better if we.. You know..". He finally got back his ability to formulate a coherent sentence. „Of course! I'm sorry, I didn't even think..". „It's okay" she interrupted him, smiling softly. He hesitated for a second. „Are you sure?" She slightly nodded . „Yes." She bowed back down and kissed him again. „So?" she breathed against his neck. „In the top drawer." he faintly answered, his hands slowly starting to wander up and down her back again.
She lifted herself and reached over him to the side of the bed. He could hear the drawer being opened and a quick rustling before her body sank back down on his. She pressed her lips on his and before he could notice anything else she took him in her hands and with a quick movement rolled the condom over him. He gasped at the feeling of her delicate hands holding him firmly.
Without any more hesitation she placed her hips on top of him again and as she lowered down they both let out a deep, moaned breath. Her eyes firmly shut she took a moment to adjust to him, sinking down even a little further to completely take him in. For a couple of seconds they remained still, just taking in the feeling of being connected again. Then he placed his hand on her hips and with the slightest pressure he started to push her down on him. She took on his directions and slowly started to move her hips back and forth. He pressed his head into the pillow as her pace fastened. Moaning her name he tightened his grip on her hips, trying to find something to hold on to as his arousal grew bigger and bigger. She breathed in the rhythm of her hips rocking against his body again and again. After a short time she already felt that it wouldn't take much longer for her. Her hands found his on her hips and they intertwined their fingers. Placing their hands next to his head she leaned over him, her center now brushing against him with every movement. She groaned at the burning feeling of her high building up in her abdomen.
He knew she was as close as him so he just let himself fall. With a few more rocking movements she pushed him over the edge and as the relief streamed out of him a loud groan escaped his lips. Hearing that sound was enough for Kate to also reach her climax. Feeling the waves of torn-up tension wash over her body she remained in place until the sensation slowly faded away. With fluttering lids, she opened her eyes and found him looking at her with an expression of pure affection and awe. She couldn't help her already heated cheeks from blushing a little bit more. As he didn't say anything and just kept looking at her she involuntary had to smile. The look on his face reminded her of the countless times she had caught him looking at her while he thought she didn't notice. But this time it was way more intensive and real.
„What is it?" she slightly laughed. He cupped his hand around her face and grazed his thumb over her cheekbone. „Nothing." he said in a low tone but with bright happiness in his voice. „I just can't believe that you are here." He paused and brushed the messed-up hair out of her face. „For years I got my hopes up and still couldn't admit to myself how dependent on you I was. And the last couple of days I finally convinced myself I had to let you go. And now… Now you are here." Her smile faded on his words. She knew she had hurt him and that it was naive to believe everything would be forgotten when she showed up on his doorstep.
She pushed herself up and slid away from his body. She sat on the edge of the bed and suddenly feeling naked and vulnerable she wrapped a sheet around her body. Minding his look she turned away from him. He quickly sat up and got hold of her arm, scared she otherwise would run away. „Hey.." he murmured and took a seat beside her. „That isn't a bad thing. And I do not blame you for anything." Carefully she glanced up at him. „I'm sorry Castle.. I..." „I know." He interrupted her. „But it doesn't matter anymore, okay?" He paused again, trying to find the right words, which was way harder in a situation like this than on paper. „You know" he started, „I think I had to let the vision of you I carried the last few years go to be ready for who you really are. I thought I had already known what baggage you were carrying with you. And I couldn't understand why you wouldn't let me help you to let it go. But yesterday.. I know what a big step it was for you to come here. Especially after what I said to you. And I realized I was wrong."
She slightly frowned at him and gave him a puzzled look. She had no idea where he was going with this. He let go of her arm and instead took her hands in his. For a moment he looked down on their intertwined fingers and then back up to her face. „I realized I shouldn't be the one to help you let go of whatever troubles you are facing. I am your partner. My job is to help you carry whatever you have to carry. To have your back when you can't stand up for yourself." He felt a wave of guilt wash over him and tore his eyes away from her face, down to their hands again. Slightly caressing her fingers he whispered „And I made that decision to look out for you long ago. But seeing you continuously putting yourself in danger was too much for me to take." He swallowed and slowly continued „But now I know it isn't about me or how much I can endure. It is about you and what you have to do. I now realize you never really had a choice. I was the one who had a choice and I let you down. And I am so sorry for that."
Silence took its place between them and he didn't dare to look up at her. Kate looked at him unable to find anything to say. She always knew but now realized it again. She didn't deserve him. Maybe it had been a mistake to come here. Maybe it would have been better to just let him go. Let him live his life far away from the danger and worries she caused him. She felt tears prickle in the back of her eyes, ready to tear her hands away from him and get up to leave. But just in that second, he spoke up again. „Kate, I believe whatever happened had to happen to get us here. And I believe we both have suffered and hurt and fought enough." He looked up at her and his look met her teary eyes. He slightly squeezed her hands, hoping to reassure her he meant what he was saying. „I want to be your partner. In every way possible. And I want you to be mine."/p
p class="MsoNormal"It took her a few seconds to leave behind the doubt that had spread in her mind minutes before. But somehow she managed to push it away. This wasn't about deserving one another. It wasn't a question of debt or who was right. It was a decision she had made last night before she came here. The decision to put him first. And from what he said and from what she felt since she had come here, he had made the same decision. That was all that mattered and she convinced herself that it was enough to somehow make this work. Even though she knew there probably still was a lot of work for them ahead.
But that wasn't important, not at this moment. With a little effort, she brought a smile to her lips and gently squeezed his hands back. „You know what then?" He raised his eyebrows at her and her smile widened. „You better get used to me being around. Because being my partner in, as you call it, every way possible will be very time-consuming." A slight and relieved laugh escaped his mouth. „Well, I think I can handle that." „You do?" she chuckled. „Then I better let you know there are also a few obligations coming with it." „That would be?" She leaned forward so that her lips almost touched his. „Making me breakfast. I'm starving."
She pressed a quick kiss to his lips and got up from the bed, pulling him with her out of the bedroom to the kitchen.