Jimmy opened his eyes slowly; stomach rolling from a night of puking as he looked around the empty living room. Memories of the night before came flooding back as he finally spotted Cheddar Bob asleep in a recliner and Future on the love seat. Shea was nowhere to be seen.
"Yo, Bob."
Cheddar moved slightly but didn't respond. "Yo, Cheddar." Nothing.
"She left, homie. After you finally finished throwing your guts up she helped you get on the couch and she bounced. Said to call Jeanine if you needed help getting home." Future muttered without opening his eyes; causing Jimmy to sit up on the couch and run his hands through his hair. "What the fuck happened last night?" He asked; glancing around the room again.
"She's caught you with your tongue down Jeanine's throat. She's never gonna forgive you for that shit, dog."
"That wasn't Jeanine." Jimmy assured him; only to have Cheddar Bob finally speak up. "Yeah it was, Rabbit. You were just to fucked up to know it."
Future turned in the chair to go back to sleep; ignoring Jimmy as he stood and went to the ruined bathroom - pulling his sweatshirt off and throwing it in the hamper before he ran some water over his face and rinsed his mouth. He had to find Shea and make this shit right.
x
Stephanie looked up from the small television in her living room; holding Lily in her arms as the four year old sniffled and clung to her mother. Jimmy opened the door to their trailer a moment later; letting it slam behind him.
He walked past them and into his room; slamming his palm into the wall. "Where the fuck is she?" Demanding as he stepped back into the living room. "What did you do, Rabbit?"
"Mom. I don't have time for this shit right now - where the fuck is Shea?"
She practically lived at their house. Stephanie shook her head; placing Lily beside her on the couch as she stood and closed the space between them. "Shea showed up last night and grabbed all of her stuff then left. She said you were at some graduation party with a whore. Why would you do that to her, Jimmy? You and that girl belong together."
"Fuck. Did she go home?" He asked not waiting for her to answer as he pushed past her and went out the door; jogging across the lawn to the bedroom window they usually met at. "Yo, Shea! Come talk to me!" He pleaded; banging his palm on the glass. "Please! You know I wouldn't pull no shit like that with you - I was fucked up. Please, come talk to me."
He stood there begging for nearly thirty minutes before rounding the corner and going to the front door; banging his fist against the trailer as he yelled her name until he lost his voice. No one ever answered him.
X
"Why the fuck are you on my porch." A short; balding man muttered - holding a cigarette between his lips as he kicked Jimmy swiftly in the ribs; jolting him awake as he cried out and clutched his side. "You fucking my girl?" The man asked as Jimmy scrambled to his feet; glaring at him in the dark. "What? No. I need to talk to Shea."
"Maria's kid? She lives with some loser and his hot ass mom down the road. Get the fuck off my porch."
Jimmy held his side tightly; narrowing his eyes as the asshole pushed past him and opened the front door - slamming it in his face as he tried to look inside to spot Shea. Not wanting to bring anymore attention to her now that her asshole step dad was home he moved off the porch and back to his trailer; sitting down on the steps of his own porch.
He sat in silence for well over an hour; waiting for any movement at the trailer next door. "Rabbit. You're going to freeze to death out here." Stephanie muttered as she stepped out on to the porch and sat beside her son; leaning in to his throbbing side to offer her warmth.
"She's never gonna talk to me again." Jimmy whispered; his voice still raw from screaming Shea's name all evening. "She'll come around. That girl loves you, Rabbit. What did you do?"
He didn't know if Stephanie cared or was just being nosy. "I got fucked up last night and thought another girl was Shea. A girl she fucking hates. She caught us making out in a bedroom."
"Damn. You got a cigarette?"
Jimmy sighed; shaking his head. "You don't smoke?"
"No, mom. I don't smoke. Shit. I'm gonna go shower and get the fuck out of here. If Shea comes out of that house tell her I'll be down at the tracks." He muttered; standing quickly and disappearing into the house.
X
"Yo! Bunny rabbit! Cleanin' up nice, shit." Future muttered as Jimmy closed the space between them and they slapped hands. "You seen Shea out here?" He asked; glancing around the small group of people who were gathered around rap battling. "Nah. I ain't seen her since last night. Y'all bang that shit out or what?"
Jimmy shook his head no; glancing up to see Jeanine staring at him from across the tracks. "She'll come around, dog. She stayed right by your side while you was, ya know - projectile puking all over Sol's house last night. Once you settled down is when she left. She cares about you."
Jimmy watched as Jeanine lifted her hand in a small wave. "You just gotta chill with that crazy jealousy shit. It ain't a good look." Future watched as Jimmy wandered off from him; jogging across the railroad tracks to meet up with Jeanine. "Shit. That boy's got a death wish."
"Hey Jimmy."
"Yo. What the fuck was that last night?"
"What? I thought you were into me. You kept telling me how Shea was fucking around with Dante Jones and Marcus Michael's. We talked about getting a place together."
Jimmy could only stare at her. "I don't think Shea's fucking with those guys. She's not like that."
"That's not what you were saying last night." She muttered with a shrug. "Anyway. I'm getting a place on Montgomery next week. You could get out of the trailer park and away from your mom. I know she's driving you crazy."
"Why would I move in with you? I don't even know you."
Jeanine smiled; brushing a strand of fallen hair from her eyes as she closed the space between them suddenly and placed a kiss to his cheek. "You could change that." She assured before turning away from him and heading back across eight mile. Jimmy shook his head and turned back to Future; eyes going wide as he spotted his friend standing beside Shea. If looks could kill he would have dropped dead at the pain in her eyes. He watched as she turned to Future and said something; pointing in his direction before turning back to the trailer park.
"Yo! Shea! Hold on!" He yelled; jogging back towards them as Future stepped in his way suddenly - blocking him from getting to her as she stormed past Cheddar Bob. "Keep him the fuck away from me!" Shea yelled - her voice echoing off the rail crates. A hushed silence fell over the group. "Yo, let me by I gotta talk to her."
Future shook his head no as Bob met up with them; standing beside him to make a makeshift barricade. "She said to leave her alone, rabbit." He muttered as anger washed over their friend. "I don't give a fuck! Move bitch!"
Neither friend budged as Shea got further away.
"Why the fuck are you doing this to me? I need to go talk to her!"
"You need to just let her calm down, rabbit. I told you not to fuck up our crew. You fuckin' slip in on Shea and then get hella crazy. I mean I know good pussy does that to people but damn. Now you're fucking with Jeanine McGrady? The fuck bro. You need to go home and chill and keep your fucking dick in your pants."
Jimmy ran his hands over his face; looking up into the night sky as he processed the shit that was his life right now.
X
"Mother fucker if you bang on this door one more mother fucking time I'm gonna put another hole in your ass!" Shea's current stepdad yelled; slamming the door in Jimmy's face again. "Fuck!" He yelled; storming off the porch and back to his own shitty trailer. Shea hadn't resurfaced in almost a week; locked away in her own prison with an alcoholic mom and abusive step dad and it was all his fault.
"Sup, dog. Still no word from Shea?" Future asked; walking up the driveway to sit beside Jimmy on his porch steps. "Nah. Shits locked up - that asshole Darren won't let me in. I really fucked up, Fut."
Future could only nod. "Shea told me she got into Michigan University a few weeks ago. Told me not to tell you because she wasn't going to leave the three one three."
Jimmy glanced over at Future and narrowed his eyes. "So why you telling me now?" He asked - watching Future continue shaking his head. "Marlena got in there too and they're gonna rent a spot closer to the college."
"That's like an hour away!" Jimmy snapped turning back to Shea's trailer as he stood to his feet. "Yo. Rabbit. You know her step dad will shoot you. Chill."
"She can't fucking move an hour away, Future! I can't fucking… I can't… I just fucking can't okay?"
"Yo. This ain't about you, Jimmy. Shea deserves a shot at this life just like you. You gotta let her go man."
"I can't…" Jimmy whispered; running his hands over his face. "Can you tell Marlena to please talk to her? If she leaves without talking to me I'm going to lose my fucking mind."
"Alright, dog. I'll see what I can do just don't knock on that door no more or we're going to be coming to your funeral next week."
"Alright…" He muttered; giving Shea's trailer one last glance as they turned towards the rail road tracks to meet up with Sol and Bob.
X
Jimmy groaned as he sat down in the top step of his porch several hours later; glancing over at Shea's trailer. To his surprise she was leaned against the side with her arms wrapped tightly around her. Her hair blew into her eyes as she stood watching him carefully; neither making a move.
After an intense minute Jimmy bowed his head; running his hands over his face and into his short hair.
"Jeanine's telling everyone that she's pregnant with your kid." Shea muttered suddenly; causing him to look up at her as she stood in front of him - arms still crossed over her chest. "Shea… I swear I didn't…"
"I know." She assured; meeting his sad eyes. "I wouldn't do that to you. I love you…"
"I know. I love you too Jimmy."
He brightened at her words; but she wasn't smiling. She looked utterly heart broken. "Shea… I swear I'll do anything to make this right. No more psycho jealousy shit. No more drinking. I'll beat Jeanine's ass myself."
Shea closed the space between them slowly; running her fingers along his jaw as he looked up to meet her eyes and she leaned into him - placing her lips to his softly. Jimmy wrapped his arms around her thin waist and pulled her into him; deepening the kiss quickly. They stayed trapped in each others embrace for what seemed like forever before Shea finally pulled away - biting her lip as she kept her eyes closed and took in a deep breath.
"Why did that feel like goodbye?" Jimmy whispered; watching as her tear filled eyes opened - tears streaking her face. "I'm leaving for Michigan University in the morning. I couldn't go without saying goodbye."
Jimmy felt his heart break. He wanted Shea to get out of 8 Mile and make something of herself - she'd always wanted to be a nurse and now she had a shot at it. She wouldn't be held back with his rapping bullshit but he didn't want her to leave. He knew they'd grow apart if she wasn't with him everyday.
"Shea…" His voice broke with emotion; searching her sad eyes. "I'm gonna miss you."
"Me too." She assured; kissing him again before she put some space between them and headed back to her trailer.
X
One month later.
Jimmy placed a heavy box in Jeanine's trunk; turning as Sol, Cheddar and Future followed him to the borrowed hunk of junk and handed over the few belongings he owned. "You sure this piece of shit will get you out of eight one oh?" Future muttered; inspecting the shitty Honda with a laugh.
Jimmy just grinned; slapping hands with his friends. His mom had been on his ass every day since Shea left about what happened with them and him watching Lily every waking second. After a week of that shit he hooked up with Jeanine and agreed to move in with her. He hadn't spoke to Shea since the night she told him goodbye.
"You sure you know what you're doin', dog? Jeanine McCarthy?" Future muttered; pulling Rabbit into a hug. "Fuck if I know, Fut. I gotta get the fuck out of this trailer park… to many memories…" He muttered shaking his head.
"Alright, dog. Your ass better be at The Shelter this weekend. Don't let that trick hold you back."
Jimmy nodded again; slapping hands with Cheddar then Sol. "I'll see y'all Saturday." He assured, pulling the car into drive as Cheddar ran up to the window to stop him. "Yo, Rabbit. What about Shea?" He asked innocently.
Jimmy swallowed the lump that formed in his throat; keeping his eyes forward. "What about her Bob?" Muttering as he pulled out of the trailer park; leaving his crew behind.
X