The hokage streams smoke as he exhales. He reads over the reports before addressing sam.
"You have completed fifty D rank missions in just eight days? How?" The hokage is shocked.
"My team used their unique abilities. Any cutting tasks were given to william. Any tasks involving children were given to jake. Any of the tasks that required grunt work were given to james. Then we did a group activity like walking the dogs. This allowed us to get all of our D rank missions out of the way." Sam explains.
"Alright. Guess you have earned a C rank." The hokage is interrupted by the door slamming open and a pink haired bitch screaming.
"LORD HOKAGE! SASUKE NEEDS A BETTER MISSION TO GET STRONGER! THESE CHORES ARE BENEATH SOMEONE OF HIS STATUS AND STRENGTH!" Sakura screams.
God that bitch is loud. Her noise covers up the sound of her team following her.
Sasuke is arrogantly smirking as his lap dog screeches. Naruto is standing off to the side and looks upset about something. Kakashi is reading his porn and ignoring his team. Wow. guess my harsh truth did jack shit for the fucker. The banshee opens her mouth to scream more and I snap.
I run through handselas and spit a ball of reversed wind at her head. The ball wraps Sakura's head and she starts gasping. Her face goes blue and she drops to the ground before losing consciousness. I release the jutsu and sigh. Better.
"The fuck was that?!" demands sam. Everyone is looking at me now.
"Oxygen destruction sphere. Still working on a better name. Basically removes the oxygen from the area it surrounds. Great for knockouts." I explain with a drawl. I wanna go back to sleep.
"Did you create that jutsu?" the hokage asks.
"Yeah. There's practically nothing in this village about wind jutsu let alone vacuum jutsu. All of my jutsus are custom." I replied.
"I'll have to send an anbu to your compound to record those jutsu." The hokage starts.
"Cant. I'm submitting them as clan jutsu. Turns out a good chunk of my clan has wind affinities. I don't have many normal wind ones, but all of my vacuum jutsu are getting added to the clan scroll.'' I interrupted him.
"Would there be any way for you to allow me to learn a few of those jutsu? They seem incredibly adaptable." Now the hokage is intrigued. Great.
"It's up to Shikaku, but if he says it's okay then I'll teach you how to do vacuum manipulation. I don't teach my jutsu, better to make your own so they fit you." is my answer to him.
The hokage nods and proceeds to hand a scroll to sam. A drunk guy walks in and we are told that we will be joined by team seven so that we have safety in numbers. Dumb idea since the team is fucking useless but what do i know? I'm just the smartest person in the village. Not even lying. My IQ is 279. The next person behind me is Shikaku himself with a 240. Numbers aside. I pack my stuff for a month and set up a feeding schedule for my babies, dad will help since they like him. Dundee follows me and won't go home though. Guess I have a friend.
We walk to the gate and meet the others. There's a few raised eyebrows from my team. The others.
"WHAT IS THAT THING?!" sakura screeches.
"Why do you have a crocodile?" demands sasuke.
"Can I pet him?" asks naruto.
I nod to Naruto before turning to the others.
"This is dundee. He is the son of the boss of the gator clan and is my personal summon. My turtle summon is back home since he refuses to leave the lake unless it's to eat or fight." I will explain.
Sakura calls me a freak for summoning reptiles and I flip her off. Naruto scratches dundee under the chin and a few deep growls follow a thumping tail. Great. Now he has a new friend. Sasuke approaches me after we start walking and I glance at him.
"Give me the contract. The power of the gators is wasted on a clan like the nara." sasuke demands. Wow.
"Fuck off. The nara is a good clan when you need strategists and the contract is considered a family summon. Plus. The only way to summon gators is to fight the boss summon and leave a scar on hide that can take tailed beast bombs without a scratch.'' I replied to him.
"Tailed beast bombs?" asks Naruto from next to dundee.
"Why don't you know this? You contain the nine tailed fox." I snap back.
Shadows block a kunai and I glance over to see that kakashi is now glaring and his book is gone.
"Revealing S rank secrets to a civilian is punishable by death." Kakashi snaps.
"Oh fuck off. It's not a secret. Everyone calls him some derogatory name related to foxes, demons, tails, or something like that. The kid throws around shadow clones like that tenten chick throws kunai. Add onto that that his surname is the same as the previous container and his father gave him his hair/ eyes. It's not that hard to figure out." i drawl.
"How do I make a tailed beast bomb? Also, what is it?" Naruto interrupts.
"A tailed beast bomb is the culmination of a tailed beast mixing negative and positive chakra. The chaos resulting from opposites mixing creates a damn near unstoppable force of destruction that is usually fired as a ball like the fireball jutsu. You can't make it for a while since the only way to make one is to either synchronize with your beast, get overtaken by the beast, or dominate the beast til it willingly gives you the power needed to make one. You haven't talked to the beast yet since that would be shown in moments where you space out. You have not gained new marks so you're not under the command of your beast, and you're too weak to dominate the nine tailed fox." i explain.
Naruto falls silent and sasuke looks at him with a greedy gaze.
"Don't. The fox has hated the uchiha since madara took him over. If you got it sealed into a child of your clan then the fox would use its power to melt the kid." I told sasuke.
Sasuke scowls and glances at my friends. James is looking at all the plants out here and Jake is doodling on a scroll. Man this is boring. Fuck it.
I sit down on dundee and lay back. I'm napping.
Two hours later.
I'm woken up by a scream. Fucking banshee. Two figures are rushing us and I stand up.
"Charge!" I command dundee.
Dundee growls as he rushes the enemies at a shocking speed for a beast of his side. The guy on the left disconnects the chain on his gauntlet and they split. Nope. I leap after lefty and hear a thump followed by screams. Dundee is going for the right guy.
Lefty swings his gauntlet at me and shadow blocks the attack as I spit a blade of wind at him. The guy is cut by my attack and I follow with a ball of wind that wraps his head. He falls unconscious and I smirk. That was fun. Shadows wrap the guy and my shadow stands to pick up the cocoon of darkness before following me.
I walk back to the group and see that dundee is playing tug of war with the arm of the guy that he ate. Kakashi is trying to take it and my team is just chuckling as they watch this.
"William! Tell this thing to gimme the arm. I need to examine the gauntlet." Kakashi orders me.
"Alright. Dundee. Drop it." I replied before commanding my beast.
Dundee opens his jaws and Kakashi falls on his ass. Hehe. A fresh round of laughter follows this and I turn to Sam and jake.
"Got a prisoner for ya. Do we interrogate him or feed dundee?" I ask.
Dundee whimpers and nuzzles Sam when he hears me mention feeding him. Sams laughs before petting the giant croc.
"Sorry bud. I need to interrogate him. You might be able to eat him later though." Sam informs my pet.
Dundee starts wagging his tail after hearing this and I snicker at the overgrown puppy I have. A glare from said puppy gets me to shut up. Touchy.
"This is a mist weapon and it smells like it's poisoned. These were assassins." Kakashi declares.
The old drunk guy starts blubbering about his family and other bullshit. Eh. dundee would like to swim in new water probably. I'm down.
"By all accounts we should turn around and head home. However, This is up to you guys. If you want then we can continue or we can leave." Kakashi informs the group and Sam nods in agreement.
"I'd prefer to go home and sleep but Dundee will never forgive me for keeping him away from new hunting grounds. Let's do this.'' I answered.
"New opponents to fight and new plants to collect. Let's go!" James replies.
"Can I keep the gauntlet? I'm also willing to continue.'' Jake asks/answers/.
The three dipshits say they wanna continue and we resume our walk. Alright. Let's go.