Bella McLeod

Healer

This is my first Twilight fic, and it is a femlash, featuring Bella and Rosalie as a couple. So, if you don't like, please head somewhere else.

As an introduction, you may want to read "Snape McLeod" since the Bella that trained Tobias there is the same one here, only a decade later. It's not a requirement for you to read it, especially since I will try and untangle things as the story progresses. I altered the timeline to fit my needs, so… she met Snape in 1997, they parted ways in 2000 and it is now 2011, when she moves to Forks with Charlie.

Bare in mind that I do not own Twilight, nor its characters, so if you recognize any of them, THEY'RE NOT MINE. I only own the idea of making Bella Swan part of Clan McLeod.

I also not own the Highlander series, characters and concepts.

Remember to leave your reviews…

Bella McLeod

Chapter 21

Healer

Rosalie under the sunlight as she was that very moment was a sight to behold. I couldn't help but stare, mouth agape at her, if before this I thought she was amazingly beautiful, I then knew she was perfection, a blonde goddess indeed, and I could certainly stay like that until I died from starvation, then I would just wake again and continue on with the staring in an endless cycle.

Her white skin was shimmering with the light, it was as if her whole skin was a prism to light, and instead of rainbows, northern lights could be seen dancing merrily all over the canvass that constituted her skin.

She had stood right in front of me, taking in my reaction. Her blouse had lifted up exposing her abdomen to the light too. I couldn't help but wonder if she did that on purpose or if it had somehow accidentally happened.

She looked like a perfect statue, carved in some unknown stone, smooth like marble, shimmering and providing with a magnificent light show. Now and then, her lips would move so fast it looked like they were trembling.

"Are you praying?" I asked her when I noticed that

She chuckled slightly, shaking her head and looking into my eyes. "Just trying to calm myself. The reaction I seem to cause on you, only adds to the reaction you cause on me" she said taking a small step back and sitting down on the grass, looking up at me.

I enjoyed the sun, too, and debated against sitting down like she did and continue on my blatant staring of her, or simply lie down and let the sun warm my face. I finally just sat at her side, still mesmerized by the view she was offering to me, unwilling to take my eyes off of her. The wind was gentle; it played with her hair and ruffled the grass that swayed around her form.

The meadow, so spectacular to me at first, paled next to her magnificence. Hesitantly, almost afraid that she would disappear like a mirage, too beautiful to be real, I reached out one hand and stroked the back of her shimmering hand, where it lay within my reach. I marveled again at the perfect texture, satin smooth, cool as stone. When I looked up again, her eyes were intent on watching me, they had been butterscotch earlier today, lighter, warmer after hunting and feeding, and now, they were a deeper cobalt tone. Her quick smile turned up the corners of her flawless lips.

"I don't scare you?" she asked playfully turning her hand to tenderly hold mine in hers, but I could hear the real curiosity in her soft voice.

"You should know that already my love." Her smile widened; her teeth flashed in the sun. I inched closer, stretched out my other hand now to trace the contours of her forearm with my fingertips. I saw that my fingers trembled, and knew it wouldn't escape her notice. I leaned closer to her "Do you mind?" I asked, for she had closed her eyes the moment I did so.

"No," she said without opening her eyes. "You can't imagine how that feels." She sighed. I smiled and lightly pecked her lips before sitting straight again, scooting closer to her. I lightly trailed my hand over the perfect muscles of her arm, followed the faint pattern of bluish veins inside the crease at her elbow. With my other hand, I squeezed hers, realizing that I was silently asking for her to look at me, she flipped her eyes opened and gazed at mine. Her eyes were getting darker by the second, which made me grin. "What is it?" she asked me puzzled

"Nothing" I answered her as nonchalantly as possible, however she immediately stiffened and I remembered about her gift. I sighed then. "Sorry," I started but she interrupted me before I got to explain her.

So quickly that I missed her movement, she was sitting ramrod straight right in front of me. Her angelic face was only a few inches from mine. "Too much? Too soon? Too freaky?" she asked me not letting go of my hand in hers

I smiled "No, to all of the above" I told her "I could never get too much of you, it would never be too soon and definitely not too freaky. I mean, who am I to judge freakiness in the world?"

"Then what is it?" she asked concerned

I lifted her hand, turning it so the sun hit on her palm. I held it closer to my face, before placing a kiss on it.

"I don't want you to be upset or afraid." I told her.

"What do you mean?" she asked now confused

"Of being yourself" I whispered looking up to her eyes again, which were returning back to the butterscotch color of the morning. I sighed realizing that.

"I don't want to lose you" she whispered back. Our lips almost touching, I could smell her cool breath in my face. Sweet, delicious, the scent made my mouth water. It was unlike anything else.

"You won't lose me" I told her, then instinctively, unthinkingly, I leaned closer, inhaling. I looked up to her eyes which were once again turning dark, I smiled and leaned in for a deep kiss.

I smiled into her lips when a moan escaped them. I used my free hand to bring her closer to me by pulling her from her neck; and in a moment she was gone, her hand ripped from mine, her lips ripped from me.

In the time it took my eyes to focus, she was about twenty feet away, standing at the edge of the small meadow, in the deep shade of a huge fir tree. She stared at me, her eyes darker in the shadows, her expression unreadable. I could feel the hurt and shock on my face. My empty lips stung.

"I'm… sorry…," I whispered. I knew she could hear.

"You don't have to be sorry, me on the other hand" she said just loud enough for me to hear. "Give me a moment," she then added. I sat very still.

After what felt like an incredibly long minute, she slowly walked back towards me. She stopped, just a few feet away, offering her hand to help me up. I took it, letting her get me up in one swift move. Her eyes never left mine.

She took two deep breaths, and then smiled in apology. "I am so very sorry." She hesitated. "It was… I just didn't want to get too carried away" I nodded once, not quite able to smile at her.

Adrenaline pulsed through my veins as I realized her eyes were deep black still and my arousal could not be denied either. She surely could smell that without problems. Her smile turned mocking. "As much as I would love for this to continue, I need to feed my human before anything else happens" She said looking into my eyes and leading me through a short walk to the nearby river, the bad thing about getting there was that the sun was not hitting there due to the heavy canopy of the trees.

The sight that greeted me there was not as splendid as the meadow either, however it was still quite beautiful and I was taken aback by the fact that there was a huge picnic basket there.

"What you've got there? It better be good" I told her sternly taking a seat beside it, mock glaring at her.

"Don't fret," she murmured, her velvet voice unintentionally seductive, "I promise…" She hesitated. "I swear it will be worth it." She seemed more concerned with convincing herself than me. "I swear" she whispered again as she stepped closer, and with exaggerated slowness set the picnic goodies up. Once everything was out she sat with deliberately unhurried movements, till our faces were on the same level, just a couple of inches apart. "Please forgive me," she said formally. "I can control myself, I promise. You caught me off guard. But I'm on my best behavior now." She waited, but I couldn't speak. "I'm not thirsty today, honestly." She winked.

At that I had to laugh. "The thing is I'm not worried about your thirst. And I don't want you on your best behavior." I told her smiling.

"There's still so much we need to talk about before we give into our… cravings, you understand?" she asked tenderly, reaching out slowly, carefully, to place her marble hand back in mine.

I looked at her smooth, cold hand, and then at her eyes. They were soft, repentant. I looked back at her hand, and then deliberately returned to tracing the lines in her hand with my fingertip. I looked up and smiled again. "I don't understand, but if that is what you need, then I'll behave myself too."

Her answering smile was dazzling, as always. "So where were we, before I behaved so rudely?" she asked.

"I don't remember" I told her trying to distract her from that, seeing as where we were was what caused her attitude shift, and I didn't want her pulling away again.

"I think you were about to tell me why you lied to me and said it was nothing when something was obviously the matter." She said firmly, though not really upset, maybe terribly curious as to why I lied, so I sighed and remembered we had agreed on honesty.

"I honestly don't think you want to go into that. You just said so yourself, and I don't want you pulling away again".

"Oh, right." She smiled, but her face was ashamed. I looked down at the treats on the blanket and decided to start munching on some of it. "Well?" she asked me after I swallowed a bite of the baguette I had in my hands

"Tastes good" I started "Though, generic"

She smiled sadly "Makes sense. Sorry, nothing is homemade, I wanted Esme to teach me how to cook and bake for you, but Alice said that she had a vision of it and was a complete disaster and refused to let Esme cook if she was not to be able to see first hand your reaction to her cooking." She said clearly embarrassed

"Don't worry about it. It's the thought that counts, right?"

"But I promised you it would be worth it" she stubbornly said

"Gee, and here I thought you were talking about us, not about food" I said taking the last bite of it.

The seconds ticked by. "How easily frustrated I am by you and your silver tongue," she sighed. I looked into her eyes, smiling at her. As many years of unfathomable experience as we both seemed to have, I could see this was hard for both of us. I took courage from that thought.

"I was contemplating your eyes… before, because, for, well, obvious reasons, they were deeper and darker. And I really don't want you to be afraid of being yourself around me." I looked down at her hands as I spoke.

"I see," she said slowly. "That is something to actually be afraid of, Bella. I told you I don't want to lose you… and if I get carried away, I might hurt you."

"We've been through this, you won't hurt me and you won't lose me" I mumbled staring up again.

"I might, not because I'd want to, but because I would not be able to control myself."

"You don't have to control yourself" I told her

"I have to. It's part of what we must speak about" she said leaning in and pressing a kiss on my forehead "But don't worry, I'm essentially a selfish creature. I crave your company too much, so we won't take any more baby steps."

"As long as we are taking the training wheels of the metaphorical bicycle that is our relationship, then I'm glad with whatever pace you are comfortable with, just don't withdraw. I hate the feeling of you shutting me out." I said leaning to kiss her full on the lips, and pressing my hands to her sides, sliding them inside her shirt.

"Don't!" She said once my hands started to travel north.

"You said no more baby steps" I told her pressing my hands harder into her flesh. She withdrew herself from me, more gently this time; but her voice was harsher than usual. "It's not only your company I crave! Never forget that."

"We're on the same boat, I don't want only your company Rose" I told her getting frustrated by her reluctance.

"How do I explain this?" she mused. "And without frightening you… hmmmm." Without seeming to think about it, she placed her hand back in mine; I held it tightly in both of mine. She looked at our hands. "That's amazingly pleasant, the warmth." She sighed. A moment passed as she assembled her thoughts. "Relationships with vampires are not the same as with your average human"

"Duh! I think that'd be obvious" I told her in a playful tone. She sighed and looked at me, silently asking me not to interrupt her. I nodded and made the motions of zipping my lips and throwing away the key.

"We've briefly talked about this once Bella" she said then "At least part of it" she looked at me and took a deep yet unnecessary breath before continuing "You know I want to spend eternity with you, you know you're the only one I've ever felt like this" I nodded "Well, for us vampires, there is only one person we can spend eternity with. We call that person our mate." She kept silent as if waiting for my reaction to that. I kept my gaze on her, searching for her eyes, looking for any indication of why this seemed so important. She finally sighed again "The thing is that all our instincts are a mess when we find our mate. I'm not saying we rationally know who they are," she hurriedly said "But our body somehow does, our instincts do. I told you about the signs I ignored" she said softly, lifting my hands a placing a soft kiss on my knuckles. "We feel a need to do everything in our power to keep our mate safe, and to complete the mating" she said shyly and looking down

"By complete the mating you mean..." I started but she did not let me finish, she nodded vigorously

"It was really hard not to walk to you and kiss you in the cafeteria when we locked eyes for the first time. It took everything I had not to jump you in the middle of that class full of children that day and" She stopped abruptly, looking away. "When you walked past me, I could have ruined everything Carlisle has built for us, right then and there. If I hadn't been thinking about how wrong it would be to force myself on you, I wouldn't have been able to stop myself." She paused, scowling at the trees. "That was the first sign, and I totally ignored it" She glanced at me grimly, both of us remembering. "You must have thought I was possessed."

"I couldn't understand why." I shrugged "How you could hate me so quickly…I mean, we had seen each other on the cafeteria, and I was mesmerized by you"

"The Cafeteria was when it started. Your scent did not invade me then, but your voice and your beauty did. I was mesmerized by you too. As I just told you, I almost went over to you and kissed you there and then, but you started talking to Duncan about your First and that made me angry. I couldn't understand why I wanted to mark you as mine,"

"So that was the reason for the scowl" I said. She nodded

"Then in Biology, the fragrance coming off your skin… I thought it would make me deranged that first day. In that one hour, I thought of a hundred different ways to lure you from the room with me, to get you alone and literally just do that, mark you as mine. I fought them each back, thinking of my family, what it could do to them. And about my past too, about how I became a vampire." I was intrigued by this "I'll tell you about it later." She said as if reading my thoughts "The point is I had to run out, to get away before I could speak the words that would make you follow…" She looked up then at my staggered expression as I tried to absorb her bitter memories. Her once again golden eyes scorched from under her lashes, hypnotic and deadly. "You would have come," she promised.

"Without a doubt." I told her calmly. She frowned down at my hands.

"And then, as I tried to rearrange my schedule in a pointless attempt to avoid you, you were there… in that close, warm little room, your scent was maddening. Still is. I so very nearly took you then. There was only one other frail human there, so easily dealt with." I shivered at the thought, not being remorseful at how close I'd come to being inadvertently responsible for the death of Ms. Cope, but by the fact that Rose had pined after me deeper than I had from the beginning. "But I resisted. I don't know how. I forced myself not to wait for you, not to follow you from the school. It was easier outside, when I couldn't smell you anymore, to think clearly, to make the right decision. I left the others near home, I was too ashamed to tell them how weak I was, they only knew something was very wrong and then I went straight to Carlisle, at the hospital, to tell him I was leaving. That I couldn't stay with them seeing how everyone in the family had someone but me, so I needed space and time away" I stared in surprise. "I traded cars with him, he had a full tank of gas and I didn't want to stop. I didn't dare to go home, to face Esme, I was leaving without a goodbye. She wouldn't have let me go without a scene. She would have tried to convince to stay …" She sounded ashamed, as if admitting a great cowardice. "Eventually, I convinced myself it was weak to run away. Who were you, an insignificant little human girl" She grinned suddenly "to chase me from the place I wanted to be? So I came back…" She stared off into space. I didn't dare to speak, even when I really wanted to joke about the fact she had hinted at actually wanting to be at high school and that being the reason she told herself to come back. "I took precautions, like hunting and feeding more than usual before seeing you again. I was sure that I was strong enough to treat you like I did any other human. I was arrogant about it" She frowned at the memory. "I wanted you to forget my behavior that first day, if possible, so I tried to talk with you like I would with any person. But I failed horribly because I was actually eager, hoping to decipher some of the puzzle that you are. I found myself caught up in your expressions… and every now and then you would stir the air with your hand or your hair, and your scent would stun me again… it still does every time. Of course, then you were nearly crushed to death in front of my eyes. The only thought running through my mind at that moment was to protect you, to keep you safe. This was another Sign, which I also ignored. Later I thought of a perfectly good excuse for why I acted how I did at that moment… because if I hadn't saved you, if your blood had been spilled there in front of us, I don't think we could have stopped from exposing us for what we are. Between Jasper and myself we most likely would have lost all control. But I only thought of that excuse later, after speaking with Jas before our first trip together to Port Angeles. At the time, all I could think was, 'Keep her safe'" She closed her eyes, lost in her agonized confession.

I listened, more eager to see us from her perspective. I was relieved she was opening up to me, sharing her turmoil. And I was filled with compassion for her suffering, even now, as she confessed the depth of her feelings. I finally was able to speak, though my voice was faint. "In the hospital?" Her eyes flashed up to mine.

"I was appalled. I couldn't believe I had put us in danger after all, put myself in your power, you of all people. But it had the opposite effect," she continued quickly. "You dismissed me and left me alone to go with your friend Clara. It hurt so much and I didn't even understand why since just moments before I only wanted you to leave me alone and let it be. I fought with Edward when he suggested that we should move away, or at least I should stay away from you… the worst fight we've ever had until then. Carlisle sided with me, so I did not get grounded then" She said slightly smirking. "Esme told me to do whatever I had to in order to stay and be happy, or then leave if that was really what I wanted." She shook her head indulgently. "All that happened next was incredibly stressing… I relied on Alice's visions to help me avoid you, I did not want to lie you and I couldn't tell you the truth as I had promised you. In the end, you gave up trying to ambush me and I gave up being away from you." She met my eyes again, and they were surprisingly tender. "And for all that," she continued, "I still can't let myself just be with you around, not completely"

I was stunned and I barely could whisper my question. "Why?"

"Isabella." She pronounced my full name carefully, then playfully ruffled my hair with her free hand. "Bella, I couldn't live with myself if I ever hurt you. You don't know how it's tortured me." She looked down, ashamed again. "The memory of you, still, white, cold… the idea to never see you blush scarlet again, to never see that flash of intuition in your eyes when you see through my pretenses… it would be unendurable. I saw it once, and I couldn't fare with it" She lifted her eyes to mine again. "You are the most important thing to me now. The most important thing to me ever."

"So now I am a thing?" I asked amused trying to make her smile, but she only scowled, so I chose to keep talking before she said anything else "You already know how I feel, I'm here with you… and I would rather die a thousand deaths than stay away from you." I frowned then thinking about how it sounded. "I'm an idiot, I know."

"You are an idiot," she agreed with a laugh. Our eyes met, and I laughed, too. We laughed together at the idiocy and sheer impossibility of such a moment.

"I love you Rose, don't ever doubt that. No matter what happens, I'm in this the whole way. All in." I told her once our laughter died down

She smiled softly and placed a kiss on the corner of my lips "I know. I love you too"

"Then why do you want to restrain yourself?" I asked her "I told you, I do want this… us. I want to be with you for as long as my head is on my shoulders"

She sighed before giving me an answer "Part of the issue is that for my kind once the… mating… is completed, the first decade we can't be apart for more than a few hours, or our other instincts take control of ourselves"

"Then we'll stay together" I reassured her

"There's also the fact that we can't live without our mates. Even without completing the mating, if something were to happen to them, we would not be able to keep on living in the world without them."

"So if I ever lose The Game, you would literally die too?" I asked concerned

"Not exactly. But I would find a way to be killed. Most probably I would go on a rampage too"

"Like when you went after Raoul" I told her softly

She nodded "If my family hadn't gotten there, I would have gone to the Volturi next"

"Volturi?"

"Vampire royalty, they make sure we follow the law. Well, the one rule. Not expose ourselves to humans. If we break that rule, it is a death sentence"

"Can you promise me not to hurt anyone out of anger or pain, any human or living creature, if I lose the Game?" I asked her leaning my head on her shoulders

"I can't. Vampire instincts demand me to take revenge. But I can promise you to only take it out on the one who beheads you"

"It is a good compromise" I smiled at her but she scowled "What is it?"

"I am surprised you did not ask me to promise you to stay away from the Volturi, to keep on with my life"

"I could not ask you to do something I doubt I'd do myself" I told her tracing patterns with my hand on her back

"I thought you'd be like Evangeline" she said playfully

"I would be thankful for having known you, and having had you in my life for as long as that was. But at this point, I don't think I would have the force or the will to keep on with the Game"

"Then, for both our sakes. Let's keep each other safe" she stated

"I still can't let you intervene if a Challenge comes up. I now understand it is harder for you than I thought, but you can't intervene"

"I'll try to refrain myself Bella"

"So…" I began, and then paused, not sure how to continue. She looked at me and smiled.

"Yes?"

"This mating thing… how will we behave if we are both craving?" Her smile faded. "No, I'm serious, this, for example" I said gesturing to me stroking her back "seems to be all right." She smiled again.

"Earlier, it was my fault." She said hugging me with her right hand

"But I want to help, if I can, to not make this harder for you."

"Well…" She contemplated for a moment. "It was just I was suddenly assaulted by how aroused we both were. And the smell of your throat." She stopped short, looking to see if she'd upset me.

"Okay, then," I said flippantly, trying to alleviate the suddenly tense atmosphere. I tucked my chin. "No throat exposure." It worked; she laughed.

"No, really, it was more the surprise than anything else." She raised her free hand and placed it gently on the side of my neck. I sat very still, the chill of her touch a natural warning. But there was no feeling of fear in me. There were, however, other feelings… "You see," she said. "Perfectly fine." My blood was racing, and I wished I could slow it, sensing that this must make everything so much more difficult for her, the thudding of my pulse in my veins. "The blush on your cheeks is lovely," she murmured. She gently cupped my chin and leaned in for a kiss. My hands went immediately around her neck. Softly she took one of them in her own and intertwined our fingers, then she broke the kiss an placed her forehead on mine "there's also the fact that I don't want to force you," she whispered,

"Not forcing me. Consensual Rose" I whispered back, leaning to kiss her again. She chuckled then and abruptly, but very gently, she rested her cold cheek against the hollow at the base of my throat.

I listened to the sound of her even breathing, watching the wind play in her blonde hair, more human than any other part of her. With deliberate slowness, her hands slid down the sides of my neck. I shivered, and I heard her catch her breath. But her hands didn't pause as they softly moved to my shoulders, and then stopped. Her face drifted to the side, her nose skimming across my collarbone. She came to rest with the side of her face pressed tenderly against my chest. Listening to my heart.

"Then, what about not wanting the first time I get to have my way with you, be in the forest?"

"Mmh, though I would not complain, your thoughtfulness is a point in your favor" I told her softly, placing my arms around her.

"Ah," she sighed. I don't know how long we sat without moving. It could have been hours, or days…and yet I wouldn't complain because I was where my heart demanded, I was home.

Revised A/N (September 2022): I just realized this chapter was originally published in 2012. So 10 years ago. Over 10 years if we consider it was the first of that 'apocalyptic' year… anyway, we are getting Bella and Rosalie to open up to each other on a deeper level, which is good communication, right? Right. Still, not everything is perfect. Yet.

A/N: Soooooo, first update of the apocalyptic year! YAY ME! Hope you like it, though I know, it was short, but I just had to end it somewhere in order to return to Rosalie's POV… it could have been earlier, but it would had turned into a the shortest chapter ever, so, I'll try to make a longer chapter the next one, though no promises to when the next update might be, which means you have to be patient again.

Thank you all for adding this fic your alerts and favorites, and thank you so much for adding ME to your alerts and favorites. I am honored.

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