Disclaimer: First Chapter
Story Start!

"Lets see... Fairy Tail... Fairy Tail... ah... lets see the notable members."

He had a long train ride between where he had started, and where he was going, and then a long walk after that. Overall, he suspected that it would take him about a week to get all of his business done.

"Ah... yep, some serious beauties here... Cana Alberona, 18 years old... famous for drinking, card magic... and property destruction... that last part... kind of weird." Naruto flipped through a magazine that went on about all the mages of Fairy Tail, it was a wizard magazine that didn't have any interviews to note.

Famous for property damage?

"Sir?"

"Levy McGarden, 17 years old... ah, cute, she has a petite build... a shorty... famous for Letter magic... and property damage... what the... this petite girl is famous for property damage too?" Naruto was now a little confused. It said she was a book worm, and that where she and her team went, property damage was not too far behind. He put a hand to his mouth and paused, because she was a cutie to be sure.

Famous for property damage twice in a row?

"Sir..."

"Okay... ah, red haired beauty, wears armor... I'm guessing by the size of that chest plate she's stacked... Erza Scarlet, 19 years old, S-class mage known as the Titania... powerful, wears a skirt... and famous for her quick temper and property... damage." Naruto stopped reading the magazine and closed it for a brief moment.

A red haired woman with a quick temper, who was famous for her destruction of property.

Just like his mother.

"Sir... can you stop ignoring me."

"Here we go... here... we go... Laki Olietta, Wood-make specialist... not that famous for anything... other than... property damage... 18 years old... cute glasses type... but... property damage... the fuck?" Naruto was seeing a dangerous trend with the women from Fairy Tail in this magazine, in that no matter what magic they seemed to use, they seemed to always be famous for some kind of property damage.

Except for this Gray guy... who seems more famous for public nudity than anything else.

"SIR!"

"Child... please... I am reading." Naruto raised his hand and stopped the child that wanted to speak with him.

She looked like she was 11 years old, petite and overall on the side of somebody who showed that she had maybe started puberty a year before. She was growing nicely for her age, he would guess by the time she was done she would be stacked. White hair that she kept short, and brown eyes, wore a lot of white and blue.

...

"Evergreen... 20... but that face... looks like a bitch, don't even want work with her... not famous for property damage... why is the ONE girl so far who doesn't damage anything give off bitch vibes..." Naruto saw the child sit down across from him, pouting at him with her cheeks puffed up to their full extent.

"Mister..."

"Naruto Uzumaki, Guild Master of Lewd Gods... what do you need kiddo?" Naruto asked the small girl, since she seemed like she was very interested in talking to him. She kept glancing down at his waist, and Naruto looked.

A golden key.

"... Are you... a Celestrial Spirit Mage?"

"Nope, the Key was a gift to me by the asshole who taught me magic... since my birthday is October 10th... he gave me this Libra key. I haven't summoned the spirit or made a contract with it." Naruto looked at the small golden key he had been given. The gods had their methods of getting what they wanted, and getting a key as a birthday gift for him was no problem at all.

"I.. somebody saw you with that key... and you where seen in Rose Garden... rumors spread about golden keys."

"You want it?" Naruto asked as he took the key from his waist, and he offered it towards her. Her eyes lit up, and she reached out to take it from him. Naruto jerked his hand back, stopping her from getting her hands on the key. She pouted at him again, something that was very cute, but didn't fulfill his goals. "... gotta name... you seem VERY after this key." Naruto noted, since apparently, she had followed him purely based on a rumor.

Somebody saw him with a key.
A golden key, and that rumor spread, so this girl followed that rumor just so that she could track down the key he had.

The key he didn't even want.

"Yukino Agria." Yukino introduced herself, keeping her eyes on the key.

"Well, the key isn't free."

"But... I don't have a lot of money." Yukino couldn't just buy the key off of him, and he seemed way too strong for her to just take it from him.

"White hair and blue eyes, nice combo... Mirajane Strauss... 19, Fairy Tail has a lot of young ladies for sure... retired S-class Mage, now a model... mmmm... she would cost way more to hire than the others." Naruto went back to reading the magazine. As a model, Mirajane would know a lot more about the business than the others, and would know her own worth. He would need to wait to hire her until he could afford to pay her, and he didn't see a weakness in her that he could exploit to get her to lower the price.

Yukino stared at the key, thoughts flying through her head.

"You're... a Guild Master?"

"Once my Guild gets approved, but by the time I get back to Rose Garden, it should be... Mister Moneybags should be done with the paperwork by then." Naruto looked at the girl with a raised eyebrow.

"If I join-"

"Nope, you can join if you want, but that isn't going to get me to part with this... since you want it so badly, work for it. Join my guild and work for me, prove yourself capable, and the key belongs to you." Naruto wouldn't get anything out of the deal. Since she was 11, she couldn't be used as a sex model, she couldn't even be used as a bikini model. She might be developing curves, but the fact was that she wasn't legal to work as any kind of model.

There was other work that she could do though.

Then, eventually, she could be a model or something, but more than anything she could do actual mage work, or maybe something non-model like behind the scenes. He saw she had a Golden Key and a Golden Key with a Black Snake around it.

"Please... I was so close to getting that key awhile back, before it just... poof... vanished."

"Ah..." Naruto was a little surprised, it would seem the gods had fucked this girl over out of a key, giving it to him as a servant of sorts that fit with his birthday. The girl was after golden keys, so she must have been broken by having it be so close, but then just vanish from her sight. "... just curious, how did you find me so quickly?"

"I really, really... really want that key."

"... Determined, cute... potential for the future in both combat and looks... okay, you're accepted into the guild. I'll give you this key as a reward if you can work hard as a recruiter... I want you to convince beautiful wizard women to model for us... obviously between your job requests." Naruto gave her the terms and conditions, with no room for negotiation. She might have been screwed by the gods, but he wasn't about to let a good chance slip him by either. "Deal?"

"Deal! I'll join your guild... what was it called again?" Yukino asked, since she didn't quite catch the name.

"Lewd Gods."

...

"Lewd... like... perverted." Yukino turned a little red in the face when she realized the name was suppose to imply something naughty. She agreed without actually realizing that, because she was much too focused on the key itself. "... so... it..."

"It's a perverted guild, and I plan to publish lewd magazines... for my own personal reasons... spite..." Naruto stated the reason, the biggest reason, being spite. He was going to be the biggest pervy magazine master that there ever had been on the planet, all in order to spite the gods enough to piss them off with him not following their plans. "Don't worry, you won't be doing any modelling... too young... maybe... just curious... ever watch porn?"

"What... no... I would..."

Naruto raised an eyebrow at her.

"... Just once..."

"Mmmm, better research the competition then." Naruto had figured she might have watched a thing or two, she was at that age where she would want to see more. "Welcome aboard... I leave recruitment to you." Naruto just went back to reading.

...

"... FAMOUS FOR PROPERTY DAMAGE... AGAIN!?"

What was wrong with Fairy Tail!?

Chapter End!
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