ader sat alone in his media room, this room was his sanctuary, work was off limits here, here he was free to think his own thoughts, and calm his raging emotions. He wanted to share it with Padme, and that was funny since he ordinarily hated sharing, He smiled for the first time in many years. Moments ago Padme had screamed at him, and while he didn't like what was said, he liked that in that interaction she had used her own voice, She hadn't cowered in a corner, and pleasing him was not on her mind. Vader had been in his quiet sanctuary no more than 5 minutes when his thoughts were interrupted by quiet agonizing weeping. "Oh, kriffing hell." He said, under his breath, leaving his seat, and quickly exiting the room. He found Padme inches from the door, crumpled on the floor, her sobs getting louder and louder. He stood in front of her. "Oh. your emotions are all over the place. aren't they?" He mumbled over her sobbing. He knelt down, close enough for her to touch him if she were paying attention. He felt an overwhelming urge to be near her in case she needed or wanted him.
"Go... go... away. "She said between gasps. I'll do whatever... you want tomorrow. just go... go away.. now."
"I can't leave you." He found himself saying. "I can't leave you like this." He said, trying to correct himself. it wasn't necessary, his words were right the first time.
"I... I want you to go! Go, get away from me now. You.. you can't." She gasped for breath, unable to finish her sentence.
I can't see you cry, I can't see your weaknesses. I know that would be true if I were a slave owner. He found himself whispering "Never let your master see weakness." Padme'sl sobbing became louder still. Gasping for air became more frequent.
The scene unfolding in front of Vader threatened to crack his strong, icy heart.. He wanted to call her name, but that would only upset her father. "Pick your head up." He instructed her. When she didn't , he reaped himself. She still didn't answer. "I need you to look at me. Look at me." Her head shot up, and Padme met his eyes, the eyes he was forcing at that moment to be blue. Her sobs were ripping through her body, and she was now shaking. "You need to breathe. " Vader recognized moments before that she was hyperventilating, he forced himself to stay calm. "I need you to breathe. Slow down your crying. I need you to breathe through your nose." She let out one last gut wrenching sob before she slowly began to follow his instructions. His voice was like an anchor in a storm, and she listened to it intently. "I know where you are right now.. I know you think that I'm a liar, but that doesn't matter now. What matters now is that you breathe." Vader watched as Padme's breathing returned to a normal rate. Tears streamed down her face, but she was no longer shaking or crying uncontrollably.
"I want to die." She whispered.
"No, no you don't, it just feels like that., I know, but you survived the worst. and you're alive!."
Padme sat up. She inched closer to the strange man on the floor with her. She was too exhausted to come up with a response to his comment. With her last drop of energy for that night, she put her head on Vader's shoulder, and closed her eyes.