Chapter 19: Getting out of hand.
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AN: Hello again.
I now have beef with Yugoslavia. I was playing a game of HOI4 and was trying to get Wojtek on the throne of Poland and it was going pretty well, then Yugoslavia joined the Axis, called in Germany and Italy, then got kicked from the faction because Germany wanted to invade them. I managed to hold on for a month, but since a majority of my army was stuck in Yugoslavia and then Romania, I couldn't do diddly squat. I did inflict over a million casualties upon my foes before I fell.
I drank a G-fuel and did some exercising before I started writing for the all-nighter and my legs started shaking. I am unable to determine if the shaking came from the caffeine or the squats.
At the time of writing, I have been up for more than 24 hours straight, G-fuel is like a miracle thing I barely even feel tired. I also wrote a majority of the chapter in the past 24 hours, like 4,000+ words worth.
Discord: /eSSP2GtYQS
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The morning after the zombie attack, Dipper was hanging out with Wendy. The two were at Wendy's house, watching bad movies and then laughing at those bad movies. The current movie was Nearly almost Dead But Not Quite!.
"What do we do, Chadley? I thought they were dead!" one of the two characters on-screen asked as zombies surrounded the pair.
"Far worse, Trixandra! They're... Nearly Almost Dead But Not Quite!" Chadley responded.
"Man, these movies are a lot less scary when you've actually fought real zombies." Dipper commented.
"They're slow! Just power-walk away from them!" Wendy said to the TV.
"How much you want to bet that guy dies first?" Dipper asked, pointing to Chadley.
A chomp was heard from the movie followed by Chadley screaming. "Aah! My face is being eaten a lot!"
Wendy and Dipper burst out laughing.
"Chadley ain't pretty no more." Wendy said. Wendy's phone buzzed and Wendy reached into her pocket to grab it. "One sec. Ugh, another text from Robbie." She groaned.
"Oh, yeah! Robbie." Dipper laughed awkwardly. "How's… uh, how's all that going?"
"Ugh, I'm over him, I just wish he was over me! Just look at these texts." Wendy said, holding up her phone. "Winky frown? What does that even mean?"
"And you're not..." Dipper coughed uncomfortably. "not like, seeing any other guys or..." Dipper trailed off, looking at Wendy through the corner of his eyes.
"Of course I am, meet my new boyfriend, dude." Wendy said, grabbing hold of a blue walrus with a purple bowler hat.
Dipper laughed. "Right, right. So, I was wondering if maybe you wanted to maybe if, you know, you and me, whatever... I mean if maybe you…" Dipper said awkwardly, trying to force out his question before giving up and switching to a different question defeatedly. "wanted to join me and Mabel on this mystery hunt tomorrow? Conspiracy stuff and all that? That's all."
"Yeah, dude. I love doing junk with friends." Wendy said before turning back to the TV. "Yo Chadley, watch out!"
"Yeah, 'cause that's what we are. It's all we'll ever be." Dipper said dejectedly, looking at his confession note to Wendy. "Friends." Dipper said, laying down on Wendy's bed.
"Dude, you're laying on my bra." Wendy casually said to Dipper.
Dipper screamed and sat up.
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Technoblade was exploring the underground starting from the massive crack near the Mystery Shack. The crack released a horde of zombies, and Techno decided to fully clean up the underground. This time, however, he was going slowly and checking for caved in sections that could theoretically hold more zombies.
Underground was simultaneously comforting and disagreeable to the Piglin. On one hand, the severall tons of earth above his heads reminded him of the Nether, and on the other hand it was much more cramped than the nether, was about the same temperature as the surface, and lacked the light dusting of red light from the lava lakes that make up a majority of the Nether's lowest levels.
Techno explored slowly, marking his path with signs and relying on night vision potions to see the interior of the cave as torches weren't a viable method of light and Techno didn't want to spend hours getting glowstone or lanterns. Apart from the echoing moans of zombies and footsteps, it was peaceful.
After several hours, Techno blocked off a corner of the cave and took a short nap in a sleeping bag he brought with him. Techno fell asleep quickly, and planned to finish clearing the cave when he woke up.
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Techno shot awake, the sweetly sickening scent of rotting flesh alerting Techno to a zombie nearby. Techno followed the scent through the labyrinthine cave system, coming across an old, slightly rusted ventilation system.
'Heh? What is a ventilation system doing down here?' Techno thought to himself. Suddenly, as if summoned by the spirit of Genesius, the voices awakened to make bad jokes.
Bananamilkshake: a vent?
"Oh no."
Carpediem: Sus?
Def_not_a_stoner:Sussy imposter?
Laughteryoga: Guys remember that time Techno hit the emergency button and got voted off as imposter just so he could say "Subscribe to Technoblade!"?
Average_techno_fan: Laughteryoga yeah that was funny
Yodasstick: Sub to Techno you must
Yodasstick: or ketamine I shall not share
Technofan12321: Yodasstick why do you have ketamine?
Yodasstick: The grandmaster of the Jedi I am. Need this shit to make it through the day I do. Deal with many children daily, I must
Carpediem: You're doing drugs in front of kids, Yoda? Not cool
Yodasstick: never seen me, they have.
: Yodasstick you should try Panzerschokolade
Yallneedhelp: Can we not get Yodasstick hooked on meth?
Yodasstick: too late it is.
Yallneedhelp: bruh
Bananamilkshake: getting back on track, go vent.
Techno sighed to himself as he popped off a grate from the air ducts, following the signs of zombies, mostly blood and unidentifiable green goo. Techno crawled through the vents for what felt like hours through a massive maze of metal. Finally, Techno found a broken grate with undead ooze around the edge. The grate was on the ceiling of a large cave filled with strange large tubes and a broken cage.
Directly below the grate was the remains of the zombie, and Techno dropped down to inspect the remnant. The was a faint outline in the dirt of blood marking where the undead had hit the ground but there were no signs of the zombie dragging itself away from the landing despite the distinct lack of a cadaver. On the ground, Techno was also able to see large, artificial tunnels, several of which looked freshly excavated.
Techno felt something was wrong and pulled out his sword, preparing to fight off whatever was nearby when he caught a strange scent. It smelled like a man, but there was an underlying wrongness to the smell, sort of like using a cheap perfume to try to mask a far worse stench and accidently making a worse stink. The source of the smell drew closer, and Techno poured a potion of invisibility down his throat and hopping into one of the tunnels.
The source peered out from another of the tunnels, looking for all intents and purposes to be a relatively normal man wearing a brown trench coat with grey hair and a bushy mustache. The stranger spoke. "I could have sworn…" he said, looking around the room. "I thought I heard something, perhaps…" he trailed off as he noticed something on the ground. "What's this?" He asked as walked into the room and picked up an empty glass bottle.
"Interesting…" The stranger muttered, trying to determine the source of the bottle. Techno was looking at the Stranger from the tunnel, still unsettled for an unknown reason, when Techno noticed that he had left a footprint in the loose dirt in his rush, and the stranger was looking in the general area.
Suddenly, muffled voices could be heard on the other side of a reinforced metal door. The stranger hissed and skittered into the tunnel he had come from originally, keeping his eyes on the door. An alarm rang out, alerting everyone in the area that the door was opening. Techno gasped slightly at what he saw emerging from the door.
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Dipper, Soos, and Mabel were standing in front of the tree where, almost two months ago, Dipper found journal 3 and set off a series of adventures into the strange. Dipper stood in front of the fake tree, while Mabel and Soos were goofing off in the center of the small clearing next to the pseudo-pine.
Dipper knocked his pen against his lantern to get Soos and Mabel's attention. "Thank you all for coming."
"Hey, when there's a mystery, you can count on your sister...-Ey" Mabel said, struggling to rhyme the ending.
"That's an amazing rhyme." Soos laughed. "When you want some, good... When you need a Soos, you... Uh, oh gosh, I don't know."
"We're here to solve the number one mystery in Gravity Falls; who wrote this journal?!" Dipper declared, pulling out the journal. "Thirty years ago the author vanished without a trace. But according to this new clue," Dipper explained, grabbing a black light and revealing notes in invisible ink, "we may have found his secret hiding place. We find that author, we learn the answers to everything." Dipper finished, walking next to Soos and Mabel to get a good look at the fake tree. "We just need to figure out a way to get down there." Dipper said and Soos walked towards the tree.
"Chop it down, dudes!" Wendy shouted, riding up on her bike and ringing her bell.
"Wendy!" Mabel cheered.
"Oh, hey! You came." Dipper said, sounding surprised.
"Dude, I'm so stoked about this. I've been wanting to go adventuring with you guys. Sure beats picking up after my dad at home." Wendy responded. "Thanks for the invite, man!" Wendy said, shooting Dipper a smile before rushing off to help Soos inspect the pine tree.
"Of course, anytime you wanna come with, we're always happy to have a friend." Dipper said, smiling after Wendy.
"Uh oh!" Mabel said, poking Dipper. "Inviting Wendy on our mission? Me thinks there's romance afoot!"
"No, look Mabel. I've thought this through and I'm over Wendy. I've looked at it from every angle, and that thing was going nowhere. I know what matters to me now, and it's finding the author of this journal." Dipper said.
"Hah! YOU'RE over Wendy?! Allow me to put on my 'skepticals.'" Mabel said, making a circle out of her fingers and putting them over her eyes like a pair of spectacles.
"I've moved on, Mabel. You should too." Dipper said, walking past Mabel.
"Skepticals." Mabel said, peering through her fingers to follow Dipper.
"Hey, is it just me, or does that branch kinda look like a lever?" Wendy asked, pointing out a weather worn branch that had lost its paint and revealed the metal beneath.
"Huh, yeah. But how do we get up there...?" Dipper asked, turning his back to the tree to ponder, not noticing Wendy start to climb the pine using her belt. "It seems we'd need like a ladder, or like, ladder shoes... Yeah, ladder shoes! I'll get Soos to draw up a prototype." Dipper said to himself, standing next to Soos and Mabel who were looking at Wendy in awe.
Wendy pulled her axe out of its holster, gave it a spin, and hit the branch. "Boosh." Wendy said, looking back confidently at the group on the ground. The people on the ground all gave hushed exclamations of wonder, which Wendy responded to whilst holstering her axe. "Oh yeah, my dad used to make me compete in these lumberjack games when I was a kid. Guess I kinda ruled at it."All of a sudden, the tree began to shake, sending four birds flying into the sky and causing Wendy to fall off. Fortunately, a bush was growing at the base of the tree which stopped Wendy's fall.
A circle of ground around the tree began to sink, including the bush Wendy had landed on. Dipper, Soos, and Mabel ran up and pulled Wendy off the bush before she sunk to far into the ground, then the four peered into the newly open cylinder leading underground. Out of the walls of the hole, a series of wooden slabs jutted out to create a staircase.
The adventure quartet stared in shock at the hole before Dipper stepped forward. "Alright guys, this is it. Remember, whatever happens down there, we tell no one." Mabel gave a serious thumbs up, Soos turned his baseball cap backwards with determination, and Wendy zipped her lips and threw away the key. Dipper held up his lantern. "Now, who wants to go first?"
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Dipper held his lantern as he peered into the dark, leading the group down the spiral staircase circling the false tree. Wendy, Soos, and Mabel were very close behind him. Eventually, the gang of adventurers reached the bottom of the staircase and entered a room prepared for the apocalypse. There was a gas mask hanging near the entrance, a locker full of weapons, rations to last until 2077, a calendar for the year 1982, and a bed pushed absentmindedly up against a wall.
The foursome gasped.
"Dude!" Soos breathed.
"This is so stupid cool!" Wendy agreed.
"It's like a fallout shelter or something. It must've belonged to the author." Dipper said, examing a metal sign that said, "Warning: Fallout Shelter." With an image of the atomic symbol. The group walked further into the room.
Wendy grabbed the sign off the wall and brushed the dust off. "This is going over my bed."
Mabel looked into one of the barrels. When she pulled her head back, her face was covered in Wooly Bear caterpillars. "Haha! My face feels fuzzy!"
"This is incredible! It's like he was preparing for a disaster. But what kinda disaster would need supplies for over sixty years?" Dipper wondered aloud, looking at the boxes of rations.
Soos opened the weapons locker, revealing boxes of TNT, daggers, knives, hatchets, grenades, a mace, an axe, and a shotgun. "Oh my gosh! A Smez despenser! I remember these things." Soos said, reaching inside the locker and pulling out the legendary Smez dispenser. Soos then held up the dispenser up to his face. "What's that? Yes I will have some of your old-timey face food." Soos ate a piece of the candy. "Ew, dusty!" Soos complained before eating another piece.
Dipper noticed something in one of the bean cans. "Wait guys, I think this can was opened recently."
"The author might still be alive, down here!" Soos said excitedly.
"Wait a minute..." Wendy said, looking at an old map of Gravity Falls. "I think I know where he might have gone." Wendy said, revealing a tunnel behind the map. The other three gasped in shock. Wendy took the lead in crawling through the tunnel, with the group moving through it until they arrived in a cubic room made out of metal. "Whoa-ho-hoh! Oh, man! Was this place built in the past or the future?" Wendy asked.
"Yeah, this room is way creepy."Soos agreed.
"Not as creepy as Dipper's internet history! Heyo!" Mabel yelled, shoving Dipper onto a pressure plate. The door swung closed behind them and automatically closed as the room started glowing red and random parts of the walls, floor, and ceiling began expanding into the room. The four backed into the center of the room, their backs hitting each other as they all screamed before Mabel began laughing.
"It's hard to be scared with caterpillars on your face." Suddenly, the caterpillars fled from Mabel's face and she began to panic. "Wall things! Crazy wall things happening right now!"
Wendy pushed against the pillar coming out of the wall. "It won't stop!"
"Dipper! What do we do?!" Mabel asked in panic.
Dipper began frantically flipping through journal pages until he landed on the page for the security room. "Come on, come on…" Dipper muttered, holding up a black light, revealing which symbols had to be pressed to open passage into the next room. "Find these four symbols! Quick! Everybody step on one!" Dipper ordered, showing the page to the other three.
"One!" Soos yelled, pushing the symbol next to him.
"Two!" Wendy shouted, punching the button on the ground and unintentionally going into the superhero landing pose.
"Three!" Shouted Mabel as she hopped from pillar to pillar to get the button.
Dipper noticed the last switch on the ceiling and climbed up. "Four!" He yelled as he pushed the button right before it was covered by a pillar. With all four buttons pressed, a door opend on the far side of the room.
"Run for it!" yelled Mabel, pointing at the door. They all made it into the next room safely, although Dipper almost didn't make it and his vest was caught in the closing connection between four pillars. The four of them laughed and exchanged high fives, high on adrenaline.
"Yes! Yes! That was, hooh, that was nuts!" Wendy exclaimed out of breath before turning to Dipper. "You ruled back there, man!" She praised, giving him an affectionate shoulder punch.
Dipper laughed a little awkwardly. "Thanks."
"Get a load of this crazy surveillance room." Wendy said, wandering around the newly entered room. There were banks of old computers and monitors, a majority of which had long run out of power, but a few still worked. At the far end of the room was a closed airlock door.
"Check it out dudes!" Soos said, grabbing a pair of beakers and holding them in front of his eyes and making a face. "Lalalalalalalala."
"Soos, Soos... That is hilarious." Wendy said.
"Hey bro, you forgot your vest." Mabel said, walking past Dipper to pull his vest out of where it was stuck. "What the...?" Mabel trailed off, looking at the piece of paper that had fallen out of Dipper's vest. Mabel began reading the note aloud. "' Dear Wendy, I've always had a crush on...'" Mabel gasped and covered her mouth with the note. "OHMYGOSH! Hey, Dipper! Look what I found~!"
Dipper pulled on his vest and then gasped when he saw what Mabel was holding. "What are you...? Give me that!" Dipper whisper shouted, grabbing the note.
"I knew it! I knew it! I knew it! You're not over Wendy at all!" Mabel celebrated before gasping. "And you were gonna tell her today?!"
"No, I changed my mind; it's a bad idea. I'd just embarrass myself and then I'd be another guy she hates, like Robbie." Dipper said, trying to calm Mabel down.
"Dipper, you should just tell her already. One way or another, you'll feel better afterwards." Mabel encouraged.
"Look, Mabel, I can't tell her no matter how much I want to, so just drop it okay?" Dipper requested, almost begging with a hint of desperation.
"Dude! Dipper, you gotta check out this weird metal closet." Wendy called out from in front of the airlock which she had opened, revealing a small metal room. Wendy put on a robot voice and did the robot. "I am a robot, I have a metal closet."
"Coming!" Dipper called to Wendy before turning back to Mabel. "This never happened." Dipper walked towards Wendy while Soos spun in circles on an office chair and Mabel was left to think.
'He wants to tell her but he's scared; maybe he needs a little push. Good idea, Mabel. Thanks, Mabel!' Mabel thought, congratulating herself for getting involved with others problems. Mabel ran up behind Dipper and gave him a hug. "Brother, whatever happens, I just want you to know something: this is for your own good."
"What?" Dipper asked in complete confusion as to what Mabel was doing. Mabel pushed him into the metal closet with Wendy and slammed the door closed.
"What the-?" Dipper started to ask before standing up and coming face to face with Wendy, gasped, and turned to pound on the door. "MABEL! Let us out!"
"Oh, I'll let you out Dipper, as soon as you tell Wendy that thing you've been wanting to tell her! You'll thank me for this later!" Mabel yelled back through the door.
"What is she talking about?" Wendy asked Dipper.
"Nothing! Mabel's just been eating raw sugar packets again." Dipper said, panicking for an excuse.
"That's besides the point!" Mabel shouted back, nomming on sugar packets.
"Let me out RIGHT NOW!" Dipper yelled, pounding on the door again.
"Ugh! Where are the lights?" Wendy asked before pulling a chain. Dipper and Wendy screamed as a torrent of water poured down on them from above, followed by a gust of hot air blowing the two together. A sign declaring 'Decontamination Complete' flashed red accompanied by a tone as the back of the closet slid open to reveal a massive room with ruined techno-gizmos.
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Techno watched as Dipper and Wendy walked through the newly opened door, slightly wet from wherever they had come from before.
"Whoa! A hidden lab! Maybe the author did experiments down here." Dipper said, looking around as he and Wendy walked away from the decontamination station.
"Huh. What do you think dug all these tunnels?" Wendy asked, peering into the depths of one of the tunnels.
"Let's hope we don't find out." Dipper said, concerned. Then, as if to spite his hope, a growling noise could be heard echoing through the tunnels. Dipper and Wendy booked it back to the door and began pounding on it. "Mabel, open up, for real! There's a monster in here!" Dipper yelled desperately.
"Ha! Nice try! The only monsters are your own inner demons, Dipper!" Mabel responded.
"That is so wise." Soos nodded.
Wendy was staring at the source of the noise and saw a spiderlike creature slowly emerging from the tunnel. "Dipper, just say whatever Mabel wants you to say, so she'll let us out of here!" Wendy begged.
"Come on Dipper! Now's the time, bro!" Mabel encouraged.
Dipper hesitated. "Wendy, I— I... I'm gonna find another way out!" Dipper declared, grabbing Wendy's hand and pulling her into the cavern.
"Wait, what? Dude, where are we going?" Wendy asked in a panic.
Out of the tunnel that Dipper was pulling Wendy towards, a shadowy figure appeared. Dipper skidded to a stop, preparing to turn and run before recognizing who it was. "Techno?"
"Hallooooo!"
"What- how did you get in here? Is there another entrance?" Dipper asked.
"Yes, using my abilities as the human GPS I found my way in, completely intentionally. Oh by the way, if you wanna run from that spider creature now might be a good time."
"Wait, couldn't you just kill it?" Dipper asked confused.
"Couldn't you? I mean, I did train ya." Techno countered.
"I don't know man, I think a good strategy when dealing with the unknown is escape first, fight second." Wendy said.
"But violence is pog." Techno countered.
""Pog?"" Dipper and Wendy asked.
"Bit of slang from my home, don't worry about it."
"O…kay. Yeah, I should probably have tried to fight, but, to be fair, I was under stress." Dipper said, excusing himself.
"Ah I see, you were bein' subjected to mild amounts of peer pressure. I understand completely."
"What?" Dipper asked, not understanding what Techno was talking about.
"Listen, last time I was subjected to peer pressure I accidently killed two people and intentionally killed six."
"What?!" Dipper asked in shock.
"You gotta understand, that was a long time ago, when I still got involved in politics. And to be fair, one of them was a dictator, so kinda balances out." Techno explained. Wendy and Dipper looked at him strangely. "Would it make you feel better if I mentioned they, mere moments before, had attempted to drown me?"
"Yeah, I guess. How did you kill two people by accident?" Dipper wondered.
"You see, experimental rocket launchers have this habit of exploding things, sometimes things that you don't want to be exploded." Techno said, explaining the situation without actually explaining the situation.
The spider monster, which Techno noticed smelled suspiciously like the old man from before, was just standing in the middle of the room awkwardly. On the one hand, he kind of wanted to interrupt and escape, but he also didn't want to be rude.
"Why did you have experimental rockets? Where you like, a general or something? And do you have any more rocket launchers?" Wendy asked.
"First, I was overthrowin' the government. Second, at that point I was more of a mercenary and built it by myself, in my house. Third, of course I do. I grinded out enough weapons for anything, just in case anything were to happen."
"Can I borrow one?" Wendy grinned.
"How old are you again?" Techno asked.
"Fifteen." Wendy sighed, assuming she would be told she wasn't mature enough for something like a rocket launcher.
"Eh, that seems old enough. Next time I open bunker #9, I'll grab an extra one for you."
Wendy looked at Techno with Stars in her eyes. "Dude, you are, without a doubt, the coolest guy I have ever met."
"Wait, why did you call yourself a human GPS? You're a Piglin, right?" Dipper asked Techno.
"It's a sayin'."
"Fair enough."
The spider creature, after listening to the conversation, decided it was not worth the risk to approach the three nut jobs in his territory, and so he wandered off into the tunnels to look for another exit.
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"Sure are taking their time in there." Soos said to Mabel as he put on a lab coat he found. "Hey, do I look smarter with this coat and brief case? I feel like I look smarter..."
"Razzle dazzle! Look at this tube-y thing!" Mabel said, running over to one of the few remaining functioning computers. She then pushed a button on the keyboard. "Frozen! Unfrozen! Frozen! Unfrozen! Hey, is that Techno?"
"Oh yeah, it is techno. Heh, bet he freaked out Dipper so much he thought it was a monster." Soos said.
"Yeah, that seems logical." Mabel agreed. "Well, if Techno's in there I may as well let them out, there's no way Dipper will confess with him in there." Mabel sighed, her attempts to match make blocked by random chance.
"It's a shame, dude. If only Dipper could conjure enough courage to confess." Soos sighed. Soos walked over to the airlock door and started opening it. Dipper and Wendy's attention was caught by the door opening, and they both gave Mabel a stink eye as she stepped towards them.
"Hello Technoblade!" Mabel cheered. "Good job scaring my brother so much he thought you were a monster!"
"Mabel, it wasn't Techno that scared us." Wendy said.
"Whaaa?" Mabel asked, shocked.
"Yeah, it was some kind of spider monster right over… huh, where'd it go?" Wendy started explaining before noticing the spider was nowhere to be seen.
"Hey, whatcha got there Soos?" Dipper asked.
"Oh dude, I found this clipboard in the other room. I think it makes me look smarter." Soos replied in his nonchalant manner. "It's got this explanation-y thing about something called experiment #210, A.K.A., the shape shifter. It's pretty cool, dude."
"Wait, shape shifter?" Dipper asked, flipping through the journal. "I know I remember reading something about thi… there!" Dipper found what he was looking for and cleared his throat before starting to read. "One night my assistant came to me in a panic… he asked if he could see my journal… I found my assistant bound and gagged… I'd been fooled- and that F had almost paid the price. I wonder, maybe that spider thing was the shape shifter."
"It did smell the same as a man who was walking around earlier." Techno said.
"Well, we've got to catch it. According to this journal, it's way too dangerous." Dipper said, looking at the journal.
"Yeah dude, let's go on a monster hunt!" Soos cheered.
""Monster hunt! Monster hunt! Monster hunt!"" Mabel and Wendy started chanting.
"Alright, to trap it, we need to get it in one of the cyrofreeze tubes and turn it on. Let's go!" Dipper cheered.
Dipper, Mabel, Soos, and Wendy marched off into a tunnel to capture the shape shifter. Techno sighed and followed after them to keep them safe.
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Philza had been informed by his crows when Dipper, Soos, Mabel, and Wendy had descended into the bunker and decided to follow them. After they had left for their monster hunt, Phil looked over some notes that the creator had left.
Phil had never approved of how the shape shifter was treated, but by the time he had learned of it, the shape shifter had been frozen. Phil planned to set the shape shifter free and take him in, but before he could execute that plan, Phil was stuck in the sap.
'Well, time to find the lost child.' Phil thought to himself before pulling out his communicator, a type of phone that could connect to any other communicator, only had text, and didn't need service.
Ph1lza: Yo Techno distract the children, I want to talk to the shape shifter.
Technoblade: are you adopting another lost child Phil?
Ph1lza: no
Technoblade: cap.
Ph1lza: shut up
Technoblade: Phil
Technoblade: Phil
Technoblade: Phil
Technoblade: Phil
Technoblade: Phil
Ph1lza: what?
Technoblade: would it annoy you if I spammed your name?
Ph1lza: bruh
Technoblade: hahahaha
Phil shook his head fondly at the antics of his eldest, before following the faint trail the shape shifter left behind.
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The shape shifter was distressed. While he had hoped to escape into the real world and be free, the only visitors he had had in the past thirty years was a zombie which he had to destroy, and a group of five who seemed to be worshiping the damned researcher's journal.
From his birth, there were only two. The assistant, a cold-hearted coward who despised the shape shifter, and the researcher; someone who raised the shape shifter like his own child, only to accidently reveal the only reason the shape shifter was allowed to live was so that he could test a freezing machine. And if the shape shifter died, oh well. The researcher had other options.
The shape shifter attempted to leave one day, but was stopped when the shape shifter was frozen by the researcher. The researcher didn't even look at him as he froze, doomed to be alone forever. The researcher called him dangerous, simply because the shape shifter dared to dream of freedom.
There was one more beside the two, one who only showed up once. He had a pair of midnight black wings, and got into a shouting match with the researcher and assistant about how they were treating the shape shifter. Before he left, he gave the name Crowfather and promised to return one day.
As the days turned to weeks, the weeks to months, and those months to years, all alone, the shape shifter's hope dwindled. Now, he was in an impossible position. Hunters were tracking him down, there was no escape route unwatched, and he could tell one of the five could follow him by smell.
Suddenly, the shape shifter felt something in the air. It was if an oath was fulfilled after many years, releasing the shape shifter from years of loneliness. The shape shifter noticed someone walking peacefully towards him, completely at ease. Even the researcher, at the height of his arrogance, didn't walk with such confidence.
"Hey, kid. Sorry it took so long, I got a little lost." The Crowfather spoke.
"Where were you? It has been thirty years since you disappeared! Why did you not come earlier!" the shape shifter demanded.
"I was stuck in sap for years, but now I am here to bring you out of the cave."
"Hmm, Plato's cave. An excellent metaphor. But, why should I trust you, Crowfather? Everyone I have trusted has betrayed me."
"Have you trusted anyone recently?"
"Why should I?"
"I will keep my promise to bring you to the promised land."
"Very well." The shape shifter gave in. "I will follow you."
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Soos, Dipper, Mabel, Wendy, and Techno were walking through the tunnels, hunting a most dangerous prey. Techno was doing his best to lead them around in circles while Phil talked with the shape shifter. After several hours, Techno finally received the message from Phil he had been waiting for.
"Alright, I got him. You guys go left then straight to cut him off. If I'm not back in a half hour, I'll be fine so just get out of here before I end up destabilizing the entire bunker. Also, Dipper just confess already, preferably on the surface. See ya." Techno said before running off.
"Bye Techno!" Mabel yelled after him before turning to Dipper. "See, even Techno agrees."
"Once we get to the surface." Hissed Dipper.
"Fine." Mabel whispered.
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Techno caught up to Phil and the shape shifter as they were leaving the bunker.
"Hallooo."
"Hey Techno."
"Salutations."
"You got a name yet, shape shifter?" Techno asked.
"No."
"Cool. Your name is now Proteus." Techno declared.
Philza and the now renamed shape shifter shrugged.
"I like that name." Proteus decided.
The three walked back to Techno's compound, already planning on how to expand the area to create a place for Proteus's house.
.
.
As the quartet exited the bunker, Soos and Mabel ran off ahead to get some breakfast while Dipper and Wendy stayed behind.
"So you've got something you wanted to tell me, man?" Wendy asked.
"Um… Well, I… I uh, I… you see, you… I, me, um." Dipper stammered.
"Can I help you out dude?" Wendy asked, and Dipper nodded hesitantly. "I'm going to say you're in love with me."
"What! I mean, I lo- do, um… I uh…"
"I can hear that stuff you're always muttering under your breath, you know."
"Oh man." Dipper groaned, sitting down on a log.
"Listen Dipper, I'm like, super flattered, but... I'm too old for you. I mean, you know that, right?" Wendy said, trying to let Dipper down easy.
Dipper groaned. "Mabel said confessing would make me feel better."
"Well, how do you feel?" Wendy asked.
"Anxious. Scared. Kinda itchy."
"Dude, don't be itchy man. Let me tell you something. This summer was super boring until you showed up. I have more fun with you than, like, practically anybody else. And if you ever stopped being my friend... I would, like, throw myself into the Bottomless Pit!"
"So things won't be too, awkward, now?"
"Nah man, it won't be too awkward."
"Friends?" Dipper offered.
"Yeah, dude! Friends!" Wendy said, pushing Dipper off the log as they both laugh and then pulling him back up. "Oh, and hey Dipper? See you for movie night tomorrow. Your place this time, okay?" Wendy said before she biked away.
"Sooo? How did it go?" Mabel asked, popping out of the bushes.
"Wha—what did you hear?" Dipper asked surprised.
"Everything! All the time!"
"I'M NOT HERE!" Soos said from further into the woods.
"Mabel, how can everything be so amazing and so terrible all at the same time?" Dipper asked.
"I'm sorry for being so pushy, Dipper. If it's any consolation, I'm already working on your list of potential rebound crushes." Mabel apologized, trying to make up for putting her brother in danger.
"Thanks, Mabel." Dipper said before the log tilted at a 45 degree angle and the Pines Twins cried out before it flattened out.
Soos had sat down at the end of the log, thus causing the bump in the log. "I'm still bummed we're no closer to finding the author guy. At least I got his science-y coat and briefcase." Soos said, holding up his briefcase. The latch to the briefcase opened, revealing a laptop. "Whoa! What the?"
"Soos, that's not a briefcase, that's a laptop!" Dipper said excitedly.
"And a really busted up one too." Mabel added.
"I bet I could get this thing fixed up in a few days. It's gonna take a lotta duct tape." Soos said, rubbing his chin.
"This could be our next clue!" Dipper exclaimed. Soos walked the twins back to the shack and then left to start working on the laptop.
That night, Mabel and Dipper were lying in bed.
"Hey, Dipper, do you think we need to worry about the shape shifter?" Mabel asked somewhat concerned.
"Nah, Techno will take care of it." Dipper responded.
"Okay. Goodnight Dipper."
"Goodnight Mabel."
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Completed 7/11/2023, Words: 5,932, Written using a pirated copy of Microsoft Word 2007
AN2: I'm sorry this chapter took so long to come out, I really wasn't sure what I wanted to do with it and was therefore having trouble focusing on writing. For example, the only notes for this chapter I had at the start was that Techno would enter the bunker through the zombie cracks and that he would join in on the exploration.
Anyway, that whole thing with the shape shifter is because I realized what a rough deal he got. He is the only of his species on earth, and the only reason he is alive is because Stanford wants to test freezing stuff on him, and gets annoyed when he tries to escape. And not only that, the shape shifter is intelligent and is being treated like a dumb pet who won't realize when he is being led to the slaughter. And then, the first people in thirty years practically worships your tormentor. He had a rough life.
Anyways, I'm finishing the tenth watch of Gravity falls right now, it's still really good. Also, I believe I may have found Blendin Blenjamin Blandin in The Deep End. There is a fat man in the top right corner of the pool that kind of looks like him at around 5:02.
As of right now, Ao3 is under attack by Ddos, and isn't really working. I'm not uploading this there yet, but it is inconveniencing me, so that's annoying.
Welp, That's all I got for now, see ya'll later.