A/N: Aftermaths are interesting to write. They're very dialogue heavy, and because the characters involved are different enough that you end up, making up a lot of the questions and stuff wholecloth.
With respect to the reviewers:
Crosshot: Yeah plot sucks sometimes, and yeah we'll be able to focus on our teased ships more.
Gucci Mane LaFlare: Glad you think I did a good job with Noimson. Crimson is a difficult character to make cute while still being true to her character, but I think I manage. As for the aftermath, I guess you'll see if I nailed it or not.
The episode begins with a series of purple rings moving up a black background, a series of small blue rings appear in their center and in the center of those rings the letters, T D and A fall through. Then they align on screen., big red and bold, as smaller letters of the same color spelled out aftermath underneath them. The D moved forward to transition to clips from the show.
Inside the confessional Geoff and Kitty are interrupted by a giant clawed monster hand reaching in and grabbing them. The rest of its arm is shown as it begins to walk off with them.
"I guess the confessional wasn't the best hiding spot." Kitty admitted.
"At least we're together babe." Geoff replied as dramatic music mounted in the background. The monster let go and they fell through the air. "I love you!"
"Me too!" Kitty replied,
The D flashed again.
What did I even do?!" Scott scowled.
"The scripts got messed up somehow." Trent pointed out.
"I had nothing to do with that!" The ginger protested.
"Sorry Scott," Amy said, not sounding sorry at all. "After all your sabotage last season you can't blame us for being suspicious
"And remember," Chris told him as he stomped towards the lame-o-sine. "you can never come back, ev-er!"
"Whatever Chris! I don't need your stupid show anyway!" Scott snapped as he entered the lame-o-sine. The vehicle is shown driving away as Scott popped his head out of the skylight. "As for the rest of you, take your million dollar prize and choke on it!"
Another flash of the D.
Crimson and Noah are shown sitting under a tree."When people say they want the world to end in fire, they usually think that means it'll be quick, but if it's anything like this I'll pass." Noah sighed.
"I wouldn't mind." Crimson deadpanned. Noah fell over, his head landing on the goth's lap.
"It's over. Just let the heat death of the universe take me." the cynic moaned, closing his eyes. Crimson covered her mouth. Noah sneakily opened an eye and smirked.
One last flash of the D.
Crimson sighs. "An aftermath? People only watch that kind of thing to forget about their pathetic little lives." With that the goth returns to reading.
(intro)
{A standing light pops up on a set with skyscrapers in the background. A hanging light swoops in front of a set with houses in the background, then a camera pops out of a sewer with a rat on it, and another camera pops out of a hole in a tree scaring the raccoon inside. A masculine hand raises up a clapboard and sets it off.}
Dear Mom and Dad, I'm doin' fine;
{The camera's point of view shows a film lot with the two trailers, city background, water tower, and fake hill. Chris drives by in a golf cart, and the camera flies through to the warehouses as crew members push a couple backdrops through, follows by the costume rack. )
You guys are on my mind!
{The camera goes up the fake hill and down into a small pool where Jo is swimming, a shark is behind her. Jo notices it and turns around to punch it in the nose.)
Ya asked me what I wanted to be,
And now I think the answer is plain to see!
(The camera moves out of the water to show Scott on a surfboard held up by machinery. He desperately tries to dodge several seagulls being shot at him. One finally hits him and he falls over.)
I wanna be...famous!
(The camera moves left to show Duncan as the one shooting the gulls from a gull cannon with Gwen right beside, laughing along with him. Duncan turns and Gwen looks at her feet, rubbing her left arm nervously. The camera moves on to show the sastchwawanakwa in a pink dress, matching boa, and straw hat. The door slides open and the camera goes through)
I wanna live close to the sun!
(A beach set is shown with Alejandro and Amber lounging on a beach chair together, a shark sits in a beach chair to either side of them wearing sunglasses.)
Well pack your bags, 'cause I've already won!
(Topher is shown in the make-up confessional having it applied. A hand sprays something in his eye accidentally)
Everythin' to prove, nothin' in my way;
(Trent and Amy are standing on rock pillars with padded poles. Amy hits Trent several times before he hits her back sending some of her hair down.)
I'll get there one day.
(The hair lands in a pot of sludge Chef is cooking. He shrugs and turns to Sammy who looks nervous but determinedly back at him.)
'Cause I wanna be...famous!
(Harold and Ellody are shown standing in front of a set of screens in the security room. Harold presses a random button and causes an explosion. )
(Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)
(We focus in on one screen where a grizzly bear is growling towards Ella. The princess wannabe smiles at him sweetly, the bear smiles back and the two dance. )
I wanna be! I wanna be! I wanna be famous! (N a-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)
(They dance their way past the lame-o-sine and the back window lowers to show Noah and Crimson inside. The camera continues through the window as camera flashes go off. Chris is shown standing at a podium in a powder blue tux. He opens an envelope.)
I wanna be! I wanna be! I wanna be famous! (Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)
(The scene moves out to show Chef is in a sparkly hot pink dress and matching Chef's hat, along with sliver earrings and necklace. Chris looks a little weirded out. The camera moves back through a large screen then pans down to Geoff and Kitty sitting on a couch about to make out.)
*The sound of the theme being whistled goes through the air *
(They notice the camera and decide not to kiss, the scene moves back to show a small studio with two couches to either side of the one the couple is sitting at. The rest of the cast in sitting on them as the large screen above flashes to the Total Drama action logo. )
(end of intro)
The opening graphic repeated itself. When it faded it was two show a set with a clear low table in the center and behind that table is a maroon couch with sofa pillows, above that couch is a set of hanging lamps in varied styles and colors. To both the left and the right of the main couch are two couches in various shades of blue and purple. Geoff and Kitty are sitting on the main couch. A live studio audience cheered as the show began.
"What's going on everyone?" Geoff began with a wave to the audience. "Welcome to the brand new, totally off the hook, Total Drama Action Aftermath show!" The audience cheered again.
"We're coming to you live to discuss all of the juicy details of Total Drama Action!" Kitty said.
"This is where the real action is!" Geoff cheered. "I'm Geoff,"
"And I'm Kitty!" The selfie lover chimed in.
"You may remember us from such series as Total Drama Island and it's even more thrilling sequel Total Drama Action!" Geoff continued.
"Which we were voted off first for being too much of a threat." Kitty sighed.
"I still can't believe they did that." The party dude frowned. "Even if it was strategic."
"But now we have our own show!" The bluenette cheered.
"And that's way more fun!" Geoff decided. The audience cheered.
"Now we can just hang with the fans and dish gossip on the new season! So what do you guys think of the film lot and movie motif? Pretty killer huh?" Kitty asked.
"We are so psyched to be here!" the party dude said.
"Speak for yourself blondie! Some of us were robbed!" The focus moved out to show all of the non competing contestants sitting on the couches to the right. Anne Maria is the speaker.
"I was speaking for myself, but glad you reminded us you're here. Anne Maria everyone!" Geoff introduced. The audience cheered and Anne Maria started working the camera immediately.
"We've brought along all our peeps from season one!" Geoff explained.
"They might have lost a chance at the million, but we still think they're cool right Geoff?" Kitty said.
"That's nice of you to say Kitty." Dawn smiled.
"Alright, We've got Cameron." Geoff began. The bubble boy was shown as he waved to the crowd, next to him a clip of him struggling to lift his head after a butterfly landed on it is shown.
"And Lightning!" Kitty added. The athlete was shown as he flexed his muscle, next to him a clip of him in a barrel of leeches is shown.
"Max!" The 'evil' man is shown glaring at the screen, next to him a clip of him being threatened by Jo is shown.
"Anne Maria," The Jersey reject is shown blowing kisses at the camera, next to her a clip of her spraying her hair is shown.
"Dawn and bunny!" The moonchild is shown with bunny on her lap, next to her a clip of her feeding bunny is shown.
"Xena!" The blonde just nods at the camera, next to her is the clip of her breaking her ankle is shown.
Jo is shown talking on a cell phone. "Shout outs to Jo!"
"I don't care about excuses, give me results!" The jockette barked into the phone.
"Oops." Geoff said, nervous. "And Tyler!" The clip of tyler water skiing when he first arrived on the island is shown.
"We've also got texts and emails from the fandom!" Kitty cheered.
"Plus we'll have a couple of you on webcam, which is super cool!" the party dude added.
"Scott will be here as well as Crimson!" The selfie lover explained. The audience cheered in response. Once the cheering died down Kitty continued. "It's weird, but I feel kinda bad for Scott, I mean he got voted out for a mistake Chef made!"
"Yeah but the dude was throwing challenges for his team last season, you can't blame everyone for jumping to that conclusion." Geoff pointed out.
"I feel no sympathy for him, given his past misdeeds, removing him was the most logical course of action." Xena deadpanned.
"It was still kinda harsh." Kitty noted.
"It's almost time to welcome our first guest, but first, take a look." Geoff said.
The focus shifted up to a large screen, static clears to show Scott being captured by the monster in episode one, followed by him eating one of the small prop oranges. "Scott's time on Total Drama Action was short, but still memorable, after all he began the season eating a fake orange." Kitty circled the orange Scott was eating.
Scott is now shown being soaked with slime, along with Amy and Ella, and rubbing it into his skin like lotion. "Later during the alien challenge got soaked in slime but he didn't seem to mind." the party dude said.
Kitty chucked and circled Amy's face in the background. "Amy looks like she might be sick."
"Serves her right after all the stunts she's pulled." Geoff added.
Chef handing the envelopes to the team leaders, and then Alejandro's heartfelt performance is shown. "Thanks to a mix up in script, Alejandro won the day with his adaptive acting," Scott is shown being eliminated. "And because Scott sabotaged his team so much last season he got blamed for it." Kitty finished.
The focus shifted back to the couch where Kitty and Geoff sat. "Our first guest grew up on a dirt farm, and sabotaged his own team multiple times, introducing Scott!" The selfie lover said she gestured left but Scott didn't appear. The focus shifted back up to the screen where Scott is shown in the green room eating horderves.
"This fancy people food ain't bad, it's no dirt clod though." The ginger stretched and stood up. "Well time to meet my fans!"
He walked through the door to a chorus of boos and cheers. Despite this, Scott seemed happy with the reception. He walked to the couch and sat down.
"Hey Scott." Geoff and Kitty greeted.
"Hey losers, can't believe they made you the hosts of this thing." Scott smirked.
"And to think Kitty feels sorry for you!" Geoff scoffed.
"He's just jealous he doesn't have a show." Kitty chuckled.
"True, and at least you were actually on the show unlike those losers in the gallery." the ginger goaded.
"Lightning ain't no loser! It's not his fault Noa lost the suitcase before he could steal it back!" The athlete argued.
"Sure blame the nerd, you jocks are good at that." Scott smirked.
"Oh that is it! It's on now!" Lightning tried to attack Scott but quickly found himself being held back by Anne Maria.
"Ey this is a classy show! An' if I can't be in the actual show I'm gonna make this worth my while! So sit down before you ruin everythin'!" The jersey reject snapped. Lightning sat down and crossed his arms angrily.
Geoff coughed to clear the air in the room. "So Scott, how did it feel to be the first one voted off the show?"
"I don't know Geoff, you tell me." Scott retorted.
Kitty Smiled. "Actually Geoff we were the first voted out."
"I bet it was humiliating." The ginger said.
"Well yeah, I mean it's like you just can't believe that everyone would vote you out and Hey-" Geoff paused. "I'm supposed to be asking the questions!"
"You're as bad at this interview thing as you are at winning." Scott smirked.
"In case you forgot Scott, you haven't won anything either." Kitty defended.
"I never said I had, this is about your failures not mine." The deviant replied.
"You were pretty mad at everyone for voting you out." The selfie lover said.
"Because I didn't even do anything! It's one thing to get voted off because people can't handle all the scheming you've done and another to get voted off for someone else's mistake!" Scott ranted.
"Would you say you regret scheming last season?" Geoff asked.
"Nope! I have no shame." Scott smirked.
"I think it's time to back up that claim! Let's play a little game called: Truth or Hammer!" Kitty cheered.
A gold statue of a woman with her hair in a bun is shown. She is wearing a blindfold and a toga dress, in her left hand she holds an old fashioned scale, in her right a sword, a giant wooden hammer crushes her.
"Works like this," Geoff chuckled. "We ask you a question and if you give the wrong answer a huge hammer will swing down and knock you clear out of your chair! Cool?"
"Like I'm scared of a hammer." Scott scoffed.
"Should we give it a test run?" The party dude asked. The hammer swung down and knocked Scott off his feet. The ginger got back in his seat.
"First question, you started off in a horrible position this season, so what was your strategy to make it through?" Kitty asked.
"I just figured I'd turn my teammates against each other, and if that didn't work I'd try to make an alliance with one of the interns." Scott said.
There was no hammer. Geoff's eyes widened. "Wow, you really haven't learned anything from last season. You actually tried to make an alliance with one of the interns?" The party dude paused as he listened to his ear piece. "I think we have a never before seen clip, awesome!"
The focus shifted to the screen above to show Scott by the production trailer talking to an intern with sandy blonde hair, and black oval shaped eyes. He's wearing a tank top and green jean shorts.
"Here's the deal, you help me win the game and I won't tell Chef I saw you sneaking food from his kitchen." Scott was telling him.
The intern's eyes widened as we hear Chef's voice bark. "That was you?!" The intern ran away with Chef chasing him. "Those potato chips were limited edition!" The hulking man yelled, shaking a first.
"Ooh, tough luck for the intern. That was some blackmail Scott! Look at the intern's face when Chef starts yelling," Geoff circled the intern's terrified face. The scene continued with the intern running away, the footage paused and Geoff circled Chef's fists. "Chef looks so mad! You think the intern got away?"
"I don't know, but if he did he'll wish he hadn't after I get to him." Scott said. He pointed at his eyes then somewhere off screen, the focus shifted to show that very same intern off to the side of the aftermath set. He looks terrified at Scott's implication.
"So everyone was right to vote you out!" Geoff claimed.
"Hey, I didn't succeed at making the deal, and I barely messed with anyone on my team!" Scott huffed.
"But you were going to." the party dude pointed out.
"He was still voted out of something he didn't do Geoff." Kitty said.
"Who cares! After what he did last season he deserved it!" Lightning added.
"For once I agree! That sucker sabotaged me, and worse he ruined a perfectly good can of hairspray!" Anne Maria said.
"I wasn't on his team, but sabotaging your own team is against everything I stand for!" Tyler said.
"Funny, considering the dodgeball challenge." Scott smirked.
"Hey! I was doing my best!" Tyler retorted.
"Everyone please! There's no need to fight!" Dawn tried to mediate.
"Excuse me? You were on our team too!" Anne Maria snapped.
"Okay, Okay!" Kitty said to get everyone to quiet down. "Why don't we show a little montage of all the things Scott did last season?" The crowd cheered.
34
The focus shifted to the screen above. The first clip shown is Scott refusing to jump off the cliff. "Scott started out the season by refusing to jump off the 1,000 foot cliff." Geoff began.
" It was pretty dangerous." Kitty said.
"True that." Geoff nodded.
The next clip shown was Scott hiding Lightning's protein powder. "Then he stole Lightning's protein powder and hid it under his bunk to make him look bad." The party dude continued.
"Not that Lightning helped his situation." Kitty noted. '
The next clip was of Scott getting Ellody to the sound system, then him turning the sound up, and then him telling a few members of the Bass about it. "In episode five he told Ellody something was wrong with the sound system, sabotaged Harold's act, then pinned it on Ellody."
The next clip was of Scott breaking the valve on Anne Maria's hairspray and throwing it at the campfire, burning his teams next to cinder. "Then he set his own team's tent on fire using Anne Maria's hairspray."
The next clips were of Scott taking the tiki idol cutting holes into one of his team's canoes and planting it in Geoff's stuff. "He stole the cursed idol from Boney island and planted it in my stuff!" Geoff complained.
"Not to mention cutting holes in one of his team's canoes in an attempt to frame Duncan." Kitty added.
The next clips were of Scott antagonizing Alejandro and deliberately being rough with the pastry crust. "He fought with Alejandro in the cooking episode, and intentionally overworked his dough."
Scott is shown attempting to make a deal with Duncan, then a clip from later that challenge shows him trying to trip the punk. "In the finale, he tried to convince Duncan to help him sabotage Trent, and when he wouldn't agree to it, he tried to trip Duncan."
The focus shifted back down to Geoff and Kitty. "You gotta admit Kitty, it's a long list." The party dude said.
"And you didn't even show the time he betrayed me when we were all trying to get the million dollar case! As proud as I am that my sidekick is capable of such evil, it was still bad." Max added.
"I still feel a little bad, but what do the viewers think? To answer this question I set up a poll to see how the fans felt about it. The results are surprising. A seventy-thirty split in favor of Scott deserving it." Kitty said.
"Wow, that many people feel bad for the guy?" Geoff frowned. "Guess it's less personal when you're just watching."
"Now on to some fan questions! Gluepunks350 asks: If you had gotten farther in the game who would you have targeted?" Kitty asked.
"Probably Trent, the guy was a mess to begin with. I could probably get him to not try as hard for Sammy's sake or something. Maybe even get him to sabotage the team for me." Scott smirked.
"Why would Trent do that?" Geoff argued.
"I don't know, people do crazy things for love, and Trent is just the kind of guy to do them." the ginger shrugged.
"Next question, T0talDramaLuvr34 asks: Now that you're out of the game, who do you hope wins?" The selfie lover asked.
"Duncan, the rest are too soft for me. Especially Al." Scott said.
"Well you heard it here first folks! Next we'll take a break and when we come back we'll have Crimson on!" Kitty said. The audience cheered.
"We'll be right back." Geoff agreed.
The aftermath logo is shown and the D transitioned to a pile of ground mystery meat on a plate, flies swarmed around it. The focus zoomed out to show Chef standing behind a cream and brown striped tablecloth spread over a small circular table with two chairs at it, behind him is a fireplace. In his left hand he holds a plate with a large hunk of meat on it. Said meat has a skunk's tail on its end. "This episode of TDA: Aftermath, was brought to you by: Chef's Roadkill Cafe, where Sundays are, bring your own meat, you hit it, we spit it."
The aftermath logo is shown and the D transitioned back to Geoff and Kitty on the aftermath set. "Welcome back to the Total Drama Action: Aftermath!" Geoff introduced.
"We just finished out interview with Scott, so now it's on to Crimson!" Kitty Said.
The focus shifted up to the screen static clears to show Crimson. First a clip of her staring down Chef in the giant monster suit, then of her finding the key in the food buffet. "Crimson started off strong, staring down an animatronic monster, and finding the key to the trailers for the girls." Geoff began
Next Crimson is shown sneaking into the vents with Noah in the alien episode, then the Taj Mastone is shown. "She teamed up with Noah in the alien episode, and helped win the castle making challenge in the beach episode!" Kitty continued.
Crimson talking to Noah is shown, followed by Alejandro talking to Amber and Topher, then finally her goodbye kiss with Noah. "Things took a turn for the worse last episode, when Alejandro found out Crimson was telling Noah about her team! With such an information leak Crimson was eliminated, but not before saying goodbye to her boyfriend." Geoff said.
The Focus returned to the couch as Kitty introduced Crimson. "She's a hardcore goth, and a bit of a masochist, Crimson!" Kitty gestured to the left as Crimson stopped just off set. She takes a deep breath, then walks on with her usual deadpan stare. The audience cheered wildly. Crimson sat down without a word.
"Welcome to the show Crimson." Geoff said. Crimson didn't respond. The party dude looked at Kitty nervously. Kitty shrugged. Geoff cleared his throat. "So, you mind if we ask you a few questions?"
"It doesn't really matter if I do. You'll ask anyway. That's how these shows work." Crimson deadpanned.
Kitty decided to take over. "After making it so far last time it's gotta suck to be eliminated so early."
"Not really." Crimson replied.
"Seriously? You missed out on a million bucks." Geoff pointed out.
"Money's fine, but the chances of me winning it were low to begin with." The goth said.
"So, do you miss anything about being on the show?" Kitty asked.
"Careful how you answer this, there's a giant hammer that could knock you for a loop!" Geoff chuckled.
"Yeah. I miss Noah." Crimson admitted. No hammer came down. The audience awwed.
"Seriously?" Jo said incredulously from the peanut gallery. "You actually miss scrawny?"
"I like being around him." the goth said.
"Why?!" Anne Maria asked. "I mean, he's not good lookin', an' he's a twerp. Not ta mention he don't seem to be affectionate."
"That's actually something I noticed too. I mean, you've only kissed twice, and Noah only started one of them." Geoff pointed out.
"He shows it in other ways," Crimson told him.
"Yeah did you forget all the sweet moments they had in season one?" Kitty asked. The focus shifted up to the screen, which cleared to show Noah and Crimson on the porch of the cabin in the talent show episode. "Remember when they quoted that poem together?" The next clip was of Crimson without her wig and make up during the phobia episode. "Or the time Noah said he didn't care what Crimson looked like she was still the same person?" Kitty showing the poems she'd found to Crimson, and her finally getting one back are shown. "Crimson sent him all those little poems, and he gave her one back." Noah is shown leaving a book outside the girl's cabin for Crimson. "He gave her a collection of Poe's stories, knowing how much she likes horror." Noah talking to Crimson after she helped him catch his frog is shown. "And he told her she was the only one he trusted during the animal challenge."
The focus moved back down to Kitty and Geoff. The party dude was nodding. "Yeah, I guess he's just not as open about it."
"Public Displays of Affection are lame anyway." Crimson deadpanned.
"It must have sucked to end up on opposite teams." Kitty said.
"It did, but we still hung out." the goth said.
Geoff listened to his earpiece again. "I think we have another never before seen clip showing exactly that."
The focus shifted up to the screen again. Static clears to show Noah and Crimson hanging out on one of the benches just outside the trailers. It is night and they are alone. "So how you holding up?" Noah asked.
"Alright. I'm really tired of Amber and Topher fighting, Harold keeps trying to impress Ellody and it's pathetic, and Alejandro's plotting. I just try to ignore it." Crimson admitted.
"Sounds like you have it worse. I mean Trent and Amy fight, but what else is new." Noah shrugged. "Teen Drama is so stupid."
"Sometimes I just want to lock myself away from everyone and never come out." the goth whispered.
"Me too." the cynic agreed. Crimson wrapped her arms around him. "What's this for?"
"Listening, you'd be surprised how few people do that." Crimson said. Noah smiled.
The focus shifted back down to Kitty and Geoff. "That's so sweet." The selfie lover said.
Crimson was looking at the floor. "You weren't supposed to see that."
"Moving on, we have some questions from the fans!" Kitty said. "Pixiecorpse asks: If you had won the money what would you do with it?"
"I'd take a trip to Transylvania. I've always wanted to go. Maybe go on a castle tour and go to the London torture museum" Crimson answered.
"Interesting. Marilyn1313 asks: What's your best friend Ennui like?" The selfie lover asked.
"He's a lot like me. We're both pretty deadpan people. We both hate sunlight, socializing, and peppy people." The goth said.
Kitty smiled. "Do you miss him?"
"Of course, but I know he's been watching the show to support me." Crimson deadpanned.
Geoff smirked. "What if I told you we have Ennui on webcam right now?"
"I'd like to talk with him." the goth said.
The focus shifted to the screen again, static clears to reveal a pale goth with black and a red fringe, yellow eyes with black circles painted under them, black lipstick and a red goatee with a piercing on either side of it. "Hey." He deadpanned.
"Hey." Crimson replied.
"How have you been since you got eliminated? I know how much you hate talking to people." Ennui said.
"It's been awful, but I've managed." She replied.
"I notice you've been more emotional lately." The male goth said.
"Yeah, I know it goes against what we strive for, but I can't help it. He just makes me feel, you know?" Crimson said.
"If he is able to provoke such feelings from you, then you clearly care about him." Ennui nodded.
"Yeah, I hope you get to meet him one day." the goth told him.
"I will await that day with anticipation." He said.
There was silence for a moment as they stared at each other, like they were having a conversation only they understood. "Bye.' Ennui said.
"You too." Crimson nodded.
The focus shifted back down to Kitty and Geoff on the couch. "Wow, you weren't kidding when you said you were similar." Kitty said.
"That was oddly sweet." Geoff admitted. "So who's ready to talk to some fans on the webcam?" The audience cheered. "We've got ginger from Sudsbury! What's up Ginger?
A girl with ginger hair in pigtails held by light purple ponytails, round glasses, dot eyes and a matching purple top appeared on screen. "Oh my gosh Crimson! You're so cool! When you scared away those sharks in episode one I screamed!"
"Well it looks like someone has a fan." Kitty said. Crimson had no reaction. "Thanks Ginger, we've also got Steve the… Yeti? From Vancouver!"
The focus moved back up to the screen where static clears to show the sasquwawanakwa. "How's it going, dude?" Geoff asked.
The yeti spoke in a low growly voice. "Chris McLean-" The voice immediately became recognizable as Chris' "is the best host ever! How'd you get your own show?! You stink!"
Chef's voice came from off screen. Yo, Chris! If I wanted to take a hot tub by myself, I–" The 'yeti' was looking at the camera sheepishly. "Ooh, you on the webcam?"
"Chris?!" Geoff and Kitty gasped. The audience laughed.
A teal flip phone is shown going off on the table. "Ah! And we've got a call!" Geoff answered. "Hello?"
"Forget those losers on the show! Lightning's the real deal!" A voice on the phone said.
"You're a Lightning fan? Why?" Kitty asked.
"Because he carries his team to victory! Sha Bam!" The voice said. Kitty gave the phone an unamused look and turned to face the peanut gallery, where Lightning is holding a phone. He closes it. The audience laughs again.
"You think that's funny, get ready to laugh your guts out! It's time for That's Gonna Leave a Mark!" Geoff said.
A montage of clips featuring the cast getting injured in hilarious ways move across the screen. Jo getting hit by a coconut, Tyler wiping out on his waterskis, Geoff falling out of a tree and hitting every branch on the way down, and Duncan with the turtle puckshots are a few.
Kitty smirked from her spot on the couch. "Who doesn't love a little slapstick?"
"Dudes, here's what you didn't get to see on the show." Geoff said.
The focus shifted up to the screen again. Static clears to show Alejandro walking behind set during the movie making challenge when a hanging light falls down to hit him. Geoff circles the light. "Looks like it's lights out for Alejandro" Kitty giggled.
Duncan is on the city set staring up in fear. Geoff draws a clown nose and wig on him. "I'll say, and here's Duncan about to get his head caved in by a monster!" The giant foot of the animatronic monster stomps down on Duncan.
On the beach Amy is attempting to build the Grips castle when her hand is pinched by a crab, Geoff circles it. "Ouch."
"Looks like Amy's getting karma for the way she treats her sister." Kitty chuckled.
In the western episode Noah is trying to undo the ropes around him when he slams his head on a fence post. "Oh man! At least it was above the belt!"
In the alien challenge Chef slips on some green goo and slams into the metal grate floor. "Now that's gonna leave a mark!"
The focus shifted back down to Geoff who was wiping a fake tear from his eye. "Oh, that was brutal."
"Totally, but that's TV for you. Your pain is other people's entertainment!" Kitty said.
"People only find pain funny because it distracts them from the problems in their own life." Crimson deadpanned.
"Well if we can make a few people forget about their issues for even a few minutes then I'd say all the pain is worth it." The selfie lover said.
"How sweet. I'll be sure to remind you that the next time you get injured." Scott remarked sarcastically.
"We still have a giant hammer to hit you with." Geoff reminded him.
"Well I think it's time to wrap this thing up!" Kitty said. "We'll see you next time."
"We got a huge season coming up." The party dude continued.
"And we'll be covering it all on the aftermath!" the selfie lover cheered.
"So stay tuned! Don't forget to join Chris next time for the most dramatically filling episode of Total. Drama. Action." Geoff concluded.
A/N: As you can see Geoff is not as big a jerk here. That said, don't expect everything to be a smooth ride for him and Kitty. Truth and anvil as well as the other variants will feature. The main difference will be why. Rather than it just being Geoff's ego, its going to be more about some behind the scenes pressure. You'll see.