Title parallels are fun

We'll probably be returning to bi weekly uploads after this though

MiharuTousaka: Hehe ye.

ArguableReader::: what shall happen indeed
And you're correct in that GT isnt technically canon, however it was directly praised by Toriyama multiple times. I dont think official canon is the end all for Dragon Ball. I'm sure many of the scenes you like are technically filler.

JCINNABAR: le gasp indeed

Qinlongfei: That's a fairly good idea, but without me being more familiar with lore of DBZ's demon world I don't know how well I'd be able to pull it off, or how confident I'd be in it. The only idea I'd have for the idea would be if I perhaps combined it with the fusion reborn movie
And yeah, that was planned for a long while. It's the main thing I've had planned for this saga, that and this chapter, sans the last couple paragraphs of this one. And I do agree with your reasonings, though it's purpose is more mixed

OnTheTidesOfEvermore: Why whatever do you mean

"No. I guess you don't."

And then I turned and walked away.

…

Piccolo

Piccolo observed his new surroundings with skepticism.

This wasn't the first time he's died of course, but it was the first time he was just shoved off to selection like any other mortal. Granted he was told he'd have more opportunities once the Majin Buu situation was handled.

Regardless he was certain that heaven simply wasn't for him. At least not long term. He could certainly imagine spending some time here, but not any sort of eternity.

He observed as several of the humans who were on the Lookout searched for Gohan. But it was pointless, he couldn't sense her, and if she were close enough to hear their calls she'd definitely be close enough to be sensed.

He was beginning to wonder if he'd been mistaken about her dying at all when he felt an uncanny, not quite familiar, but not quite unfamiliar energy in his senses.

He saw a girl, or perhaps young woman, walking away from Bulma. She looked as uncanny as her energy felt.

It took about three seconds for him to connect the dots.

It was three too many as far as he was concerned.

…

Seventeen

Well. That wasn't fun.

It's not like he really expected to be able to beat that Buu thing, but the fact that it was able to take all of them out was, something else.

Seventeen was slightly confused as to why Sixteen didn't seem to be anywhere around, since he was one of the first ones to fall. Which then made him lose his cool and rush in.

Certainly not his brightest moment.

Eh, the big guy probably wandered off. He'll probably turn up soon enough.

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw movement.

Piccolo seemed to be rushing off somewhere, which seemed entirely out of character from what he was aware.

Weird.

…

I'm not sure how far I wandered away, but it was certainly far enough that no one would accidentally stumble into me.

I ended up at the edge of a lake. I sat there, and just stared, zoning out as I did. I didn't really want to think about anything.

I felt more than heard someone approaching. I just barely turned my head in acknowledgment.

"…Gohan?" Piccolo asked, hesitant, as if unsure about if that was the correct name.

I hummed in acknowledgment.

Piccolo hesitated for a moment more before he was sitting next to me.

"…so is this what you looked like before?" He asked after another moment of silence.

I stared down at the mockery of a reflection.

"No," I said, "this is more like a mix."

It was true. The very outside of my hair was Auburn to brown, some parts at the top even lighter than it'd ever been before, but below that was darker, dark browns to black. I also had bangs, more similar to what would be my current style than the previous, also a hodgepodge of colors.

My frame was definitely more feminine than before, thinner too, and the outfit I was wearing seemed like it couldn't decide what it wanted to be, between jeans or tights, colors of shirts or jackets, even the texture of the jacket seemed to shift. And I felt more than saw the tail wrapped around my waist. Guess that's just an integral part of my personality now.

Somehow my face managed to look even younger than it'd been. Though I suppose it's not the most surprising thing, I was always mistaken for being younger than I was.

My eyes probably bugged me the most. They weren't even heterochromatic. That at least would have been neat. Each eye was half black and half colored. It was weird. The colored parts were mostly shades of brown and hazel, but there were also flecks of blue and even red. All hidden behind a pair of glasses.

"Do these even-" I tore off the glasses. My vision didn't change in the slightest. "Of course not."

I put them back on anyway.

"You know I still reach over sometimes in the morning to put on my glasses," I said before regretting it, because that felt like too much, or at least unnecessary information.

More silence commenced. What a pair we were. Neither knowing the first thing about talking. At all. In a situation that definitely needed talking about.

"What do you want to do next?" He eventually asked.

"I don't know," I said, "I don't, know. I don't-"

The repeated sentence died out. I just placed my forehead on my knees.

I didn't want to deal with this. Any of it. Didn't want to deal with it, didn't want to talk about it. I didn't even really want to be around anyone, but obviously, I couldn't say that.

Piccolo seemed to get it though, as after a moment of silence, he just pat me on the shoulder.

"When you want to talk," he said. And then once again I was alone.

I stared across the water again.

…

Raditz

This was bullshit. The situation was bullshit. Dying was bullshit. Being sent here- all of it was bullshit.

He's already died once. He knew where he was supposed to go.

It sure as hell wasn't here, not in hell.

He stalked off from the group, leaving Gine with Chichi. Just makes things simpler whenever they realize this screwup.

Besides, Chichi could probably find a better answer to "where mommy is."

His traitorous mind thought back to the week before the Cell Games. He'd told the brat he didn't want to watch them die again.

This time the brat died alone.

That left him feeling (cold. Gross. Helpless. Bad in some capacity.) uneasy. Moderately.

Lot of good that did anyway. Now they were all dead. Hell, he couldn't even "sense" the brat anywhere. Not that he was too good at that, but considering several of the others searching manually, he assumed no one else could either.

So the Namek was probably wrong anyway. The brat was probably just unconscious somewhere and the Namek overreacted.

He kicked over a tree to sit on.

Kakarot wasn't here either. So either he wasn't dead or his little Kai personally picked up his pet.

Or maybe he was just allowed so much freedom that he could just go wherever whenever.

That'd figure.

Well, Kakarot probably wouldn't just abandon his friends forever so he's bound to show up eventually. Of course, that'd also depend on him realizing they were dead in the first place.

Which knowing him, would probably be a while.

"Why hello there."

Raditz startled- "the fork-" wait, that wasn't- "fork- what the fork-"

He hated it here.

"And what brings you all the way out here all alone young man?" Some old man who managed to sneak up on him asked.

Raditz raised an eyebrow, "define young."

"Why younger than me of course."

Raditz huffed, "well in that case most of everyone here must qualify."

Instead of taking offense to his attempted insult the old man merely chuckled, "perhaps so. There are many who are older than me in time, many in physical age as well, but admittedly most are physically younger."

"But that does not answer my question. Why are you out here all alone?"

"Please. Like I'm gonna stick around just to see everyone pity once this mixup is noticed."

"Mixup? What do you mean?" The old man sat next to him as if he was invited. Which he was not.

Raditz had every mind not to answer. It was none of his business. Who did this guy think he was?

He found himself responding anyway. Not like he had anything better to do.

"Being here, obviously," he waved his hand as indication.

"Here? Do you mean heaven? Why would that be a mixup?"

Raditz had to laugh, "please, ignoring all the murder and genocide, how about indirectly killing my brother and kidnapping his kid? Or-" come to think of it, he couldn't think of many noteworthy abhorrent things he'd done since he was revived. Probably because he'd had the brat breathing down his neck so often. He'd killed one of Zan's crew mates, but that was technically in defense of the brat. "Or the murder and genocide."

Under orders technically but he doubted that'd make much of a difference, certainly not enough of a be to make up for it.

Still, the old man didn't so much as seem off put, "I see…well then, you must have done a great deal of improvement to get here."

"Oh like what?" He turned his head with a glare.

"I do not know, as I have no idea the things you've done in life. Sometimes it can be as simple as internal change or the connections one makes."

Raditz scoffed. Like that would actually make a difference. Even if it did what possible changes could he have made?

"If that were the case, then Nappa would be here before me. He actually seems to enjoy the company."

"Every case is by the individual, it does no good to compare yourself. Are you upset that this Nappa isn't here?"

"No. I only ever spend time with him because he's the person I've known the longest. Besides Vegeta."

"I see. Is this Vegeta here?"

Now THAT was a laugh. "Ha! Vegeta's probably been shoved into the hottest crevice in hfil. All the better." Just because Vegeta was more tolerable now, that doesn't mean Raditz liked him.

"Besides that, if it's so strange that I'm out here alone what are you doing here?" Raditz switched the questions instead.

"Oh me? Nothing really, I simply enjoy the travel. I've visited many places in other world, it's quite a lovely place. Though I most often find myself drawn back to The Furnace of Eight Divisions. Its keeper is rather nice company if I may say so."

The fond tone of the old man's voice only soured Raditz's mood more, as it only served to remind him that Zan wasn't here, and she was the only person Raditz could stand spending any sort of extended period of time around.

"You do miss someone though don't you? That's the reason you're unhappy here I assume?" The old man asked and that was somewhat unnerving, that he'd picked up on what he was thinking, or probably guessed

"Mind your own gold darn business!" He snapped, and damn were the swear replacements getting on his nerves.

"Ah, my apologies. I didn't mean to upset you. Oh, I'm afraid I must apologize again, I never asked your name."

Raditz didn't respond. It's not like it was any of his business. The old man had long overstayed his welcome and he was about ready to-

"Of course, it's rude of me to ask your name without giving mine first. My name is Gohan, a pleasure to meet you."

And Raditz did a double take, actually looking at the old man again, his mind filling in blanks without his input. Because despite the name this was definitely not the brat, either in appearance or demeanor.

"You're the man who found Kakarot," he stated more than asked. He'd have no way to recognize the man sooner, at least by appearance. Kakarot had no photos from before he'd met Bulma. But suddenly much more about his unnerving nature made sense. It figured that anyone associated with Kakarot would be strange.

"Kakarot?" The man asked, and Raditz sighed in exasperation. While true he'd have no way of knowing Kakarot's true name, it was still his fault that he had to deal with the difference.

"My brother, you renamed him Goku." He explained with as much annoyance that he ever did when he had to use that name.

"Oh, Oh! My, I had no idea that my Goku had a brother. I would have attempted to find you if I had."

"Wouldn't have been able to."

"I see I see, were you in space then?"

Raditz raised an eyebrow. He was under the impression that no one knew about anything like that before he'd arrived.

"I had found Goku in a crater by some kind of ship. It was nothing like I'd ever seen here on earth, even if I was never the most social man."

"And your first assumption is space?" Raditz asked. Just because it was correct didn't make it less odd with how he'd seen many earthlings act over the years.

"Well, I've never seen a child with a tail before either."

This man's logic made only marginally more sense than the brat's. Leagues better than Kakarot's though.

So Raditz conceded that point and confirmed.

"Oh, but is he the same brother that you said you'd killed?"

"It didn't stick," he said, not fond of how defensive his voice became. "His friends brought him back to life with the Dragon Balls."

"Dragon Balls?"

Raditz always forgot how not common knowledge that was.

"Magical wish to orbs. You collect seven and get a wish. From my understanding, the one with four stars that Kakarot insists on finding any time they scatter was your's."

"Oh, so that was what that trinket was. Well, I'm glad it was so useful."

Raditz's brow twitched. This man's ease kept putting him off his guard. He was like an even more extreme version of Bulma's father.

"Are you close now? You and Goku, or Kakarot I suppose."

And how was Raditz supposed to respond to that?

"…he still goes by Goku. And, close might be a bit of a stretch but, well, even I'll admit I don't hate him. And I'm not sure Kakarot is capable of holding a grudge so, there's that. My sister-in-law is more tolerable to be around between the two of them."

"I'm so glad to hear that my Goku found a nice woman to settle down with. I met her once, but that's a story for another day."

And again, Raditz could only glance at the old man with skepticism, because from what he'd heard, the old man Gohan died when Goku was young, long before he'd met Chichi.

But he'd also come to not question the shit that happened on that stupid planet.

"You mention him having a child did you not? Do I have a grandson or granddaughter? Or I suppose great grandson or great granddaughter but that sounds a tad too long to me."

Raditz squinted, "you'd think, that'd be an easier question to answer."

The old man question his response but Raditz was already thinking over it.

How was he supposed to answer that? Generally speaking, he tended to lean closer to assuming that the brat was a woman due to the Future Woman. He still internally referred to them as neutral though due to the lack of confirmation.

Of course, there was also always the safest response of male, but that just didn't, seem right.

"Sources vary," he decided, "besides that, you have two grandchildren. The older one, a pain in my ash who refused to leave me alone, and a younger one, who's friends with Vegeta's and Nappa's kids of a similar age. He's one of the few who my kid likes as well…Kakarot named the older one after you."

He added that last part more out of obligation than anything else.

"I see. Well, I can't say I understand why answering my question was so complicated, but would you tell me stories of them, and of Goku. I'd love to hear how he's been doing."

Raditz huffed and rolled his eyes.

But it's not like he had anything better to do…

…

Zangya

Zangya wandered through her new environment with appreciation.

But she also wasn't sure if this was going to be reversed as she'd heard often happened. So best not waste time.

She did have one real regret after all.

She never got her own revenge.

"Oh Bojack~"

…

I'm not sure how long I sat there really. Could have been a few minutes or a few hours. Between zoning out and the time feeling weird, I didn't have a clue.

Though after a while, I started to realize that as much as I didn't want to be around anyone, I didn't really want to be alone either. I didn't want to talk to anyone but I wanted to explain just how fundamentally wrong everything was.

I just-

I didn't know what I wanted.

I didn't know anything.

So, I just sat there. Doing nothing instead.

It was kinda nice. The water that is. And it was quite here at least so-

"You know, something's been bugging me."

I started, not sure how someone could have snuck up on me. Even with everything else I could still sense people-

Oh. Never mind

Glancing back, the person standing there couldn't be sensed even in the best conditions.

Android Seventeen stood there with his hands in his pockets, looking almost bored as he glanced down.

At my lack of response, he continued talking. "See, for the life of me, I just can't imagine too many people that Piccolo would go out of his way to check up on."

He paused to consider again.

"So, in hazard of looking really stupid," he rocked on his heels as he spoke, "I'm going to make a guess."

He paused one last time, as if seriously considering his next words. There was a brief red blinking behind his eyes, one of the few uncanny traits about him and Eighteen. But just as quickly as it was there it was gone.

"…Gohan?" He concluded.

"Who?"

In other circumstances, I would have laughed at the look on his face. It was probably my overall mood that even let me take the joke further.

"Oh, wasn't that the person the blue-haired lady was looking for? I mean, I haven't seen anyone named that so-"

That time his face made me, well, not laugh, more like loudly exhale through my nose.

"Yeah, that's- yeah," I confirmed finally.

Seventeen sighed in relief, "shirt, you almost gave me a heart attack. Which I did not think was possible, for multiple reasons, only one of which being that we are currently dead."

Brushing past that statement entirely- "did you just say, shirt?"

"Hm? Oh yeah, this place has some weird swear replacement thing. You haven't noticed?"

"I don't swear."

"You don't-" he paused, thinking it over, "how do you never swear, I swear I've even heard Goku swear at least once."

I shrugged, not really having an answer.

"Weird," he said, sitting next to me, "so what's with the collage effect here?" He asked as he waved his hand indicating my overall appearance.

"…"

"I mean you don't have to answer, but that will just leave my imagination to fill in the blanks."

I glanced over with exasperation. Even if I wanted to explain, I didn't know where I'd even start. At least with Piccolo, he already knew, I didn't have to explain anything.

"No? Ok, let's see…genetic experimentation? Evil doppelgänger? Non-evil doppelgänger? Uh, cloning? Wish gone wrong? Some kind of soul mix up thing?"

"You know, even if you were to somehow guess right, I could just, not confirm it. Also how could, like half of those, possibly make me look different?"

"I don't know I'm just naming random cliches. Also, that wouldn't be any fun. What's the point in even guessing then?"

I shrugged, "you're the one who just started guessing. I never said I'd confirm anything."

For some reason that got half a laugh out of him. "Alright fine. I'm bored of this game anyway. Seriously, what's up?"

I still hesitated, but I felt obligated to explain more than anything. But still didn't really know how.

"It's-" the concept felt simple. It was simple. But still, the words were difficult to place. Everything about this situation was just, uncomfortable.

"So, uh, hypothetically. Hypothetically, on a scale of one to ten, how much would you think reincarnation is a thing?"

Seventeen slowly nodded. "Are we talking in a vague, the memories were mostly reset but there are a few impressions sort of way, or a completely one-to-one, the same person but baby?"

"The uh, the second one."

"Hm. Well, even under normal circumstances I'd probably say that weirder things have happened and not question it, but, something tells me this isn't quite a normal circumstance," he tilted his head to glance at me as he spoke.

I just shrunk in on myself further.

"So were you just, a normal person? Or did you already have some weird shirt going on?"

"Just, normal."

"And you didn't go mad with power? Even I was overconfident however many years ago."

"..What do you mean even you? You were like, three steps below Vegeta on the arrogance scale."

"Wh- now wait a second. I was actually the strongest. How dare you compare me to Vegeta."

"No you weren't. Sixteen was stronger than you."

"I didn't know that!"

I found myself snickering despite everything. Seventeen relaxed from his defensive state.

"So, I assume you weren't a man?"

I glanced over with exasperation. Seventeen raised his hands in mock defense.

"That does explain, some, of why you were so weird. Cause you definitely didn't act like a kid most of the time. How old were you anyway?"

"I dunno, early twenties," I shrugged.

"How do you not know?"

"There was like, a pandemic at the time. All those years kinda melded together."

Seventeen squinted at me. "I don't recall any pandemics."

"Huh? Oh no. My version of earth was different from this one. No flying cars, no dinosaurs. Took years to get used to the fact that some animals talk, let alone whatever's up with beastmen. Also Magic's a thing here. And Ki. There are a shocking number of circular buildings."

Seventeen's eyebrows rose halfway up his forehead. "Now, first of all, your version of Earth sounds boring. Second, reincarnation and dimension hopping?"

"I don't know. I wasn't given a choice in the matter." Any levity from the situation vanished as I once again rested my chin on my knees as I stared back at the water. I'd call it a glare, but I didn't quite have the energy for that.

"… do you miss it?"

"I don't- I don't think about it. There's no point. It's not like I could change anything. And, even if I could, or wanted to. I'm used to being here now. Or, at least this version of earth. I'm, used to being strong."

I didn't glance over, but I could still practically feel him nodding, "yeah, I get that."

I pressed the heels of my palms into my hands, my- the glasses being pushed up as I did so.

I felt a weight on my shoulders and saw that Seventeen had placed an arm over them, I assume as a form of comfort.

"So is this actually helping or..?" His tone was still lighter than the situation would have suggested.

I once again, more of a loud exhale than a laugh-ed and Seventeen removed his arm.

"…thanks, Seventeen…"

"Lapis."

I lifted my head. "Huh?"

"Lapis. I'm, pretty sure my name was Lapis. Before Gero that is. I don't remember much from back then, but there are a few things. I do generally prefer Seventeen, no use in dwelling," his eyes just barely shifted to glance over at me, "but it is nice to remember, sometimes."

I furrowed my eyebrows and looked back at the water. "…maybe sometimes."

A silence fell over. I don't know what else was left to say.

"…you don't, you don't have to stay here."

"Not like I have anything better to do. View here's nice at least," he said, eyes looking across the water.

"…thanks..Lapis."

…

…

…

Goku.

With far more effort than he would have expected, Goku swung the sword over his shoulder.

"I don't think this sword's working the way you wanted it to. Besides, I don't really know how to use a sword. Gohan's the one who ever really used one. Oh! And Trunks, the Future one."

"Fu- no. Do not explain. Do not elaborate. I will maintain plausible deniability. As for the sword, I'm sure it will work. Just, keep at it."

you know i had to steal the good place joke

anyway, Raditz and Grandpa Gohan are friends now because i say so