soft day
pt. 7: a pull
Another week passes, and the next begins. Sasuke doesn't leave.
He trains in the morning before the village wakes up. Eats breakfast, waters the herb garden in the windowsill, and takes a nap. If the feeling arises, he'll hike calm circles through the forest, and consider—should he take the northern road winding towards the mountains? Or the south, leveling off to the coast?
Today, he thinks about it long and hard around one bend of the creek, and even makes it a few steps down the next before something on the forest floor steals his attention. A pair of shorn antlers, resting like a thoughtful gift between wisps of ferns. And later, beads of water clinging to the prongs of a maple leaf.
And then his time runs out. Wet soil squishes under his sandals as he cuts back home on hidden foot trails, and meets Sakura at the kitchen table at the end of her shift.
"You smell like outside," she says, as he leans down to pass a cup of tea into her hands. "How was your day?"
"Interesting," he says, thinking about the maple leaf. "You?"
"The usual—oh!" Sakura's teacup jerks away from her lips.
"I thought you liked chamomile?"
"No, I do!" She completes the sip. "I love it. It's just that you are still due for a checkup! I can't believe I forgot." A hopeful, shining gaze lands on him. "We could do it now?"
"Not now." Sasuke was, in fact, hoping she would forget. "You're tired."
"I'm not that tired," she says, and her jaw cracks from the force of her yawn.
"Are you working tomorrow?"
She's silent, which means he won't like the answer.
Sakura isn't working nights this week. So for the first time, their evenings overlap. Which means Sasuke gets to witness first hand how each day she wobbles home from the hospital more tired than the last. To step over the piles of paperwork she brings home with her, and open windows for the messenger hawks that are sent to call her in on weekends.
"How long has it been like this?" Displeasure leaks into his voice.
Sakura returns a confused stare. "It's always like this," she says, with a little laugh, like it should be obvious.
He attempts a different approach. "Who else there works as hard as you?"
Sakura's lips press together for a moment. "Everyone works hard." She takes a quick sip of tea.
So the answer is no one. "You're exhausted."
Shoulders slumping, she closes her eyes and rubs the bridge of her nose. "I can't be."
Sasuke knows this feeling well, of pushing forward even as his body is shutting down. "But you're human." That's what he learned for himself in the end.
"As long as I have this seal, I need to be more than human." She faces him, the mark on her brow flashing purple. "No one else can do what I do. Heal like I do. When I work, it means people stay alive." Her passion fades to bitterness. "So I can't rest."
He stares her down, knowing just which way to prod. "You need to. Otherwise you won't be able to help anyone."
Sakura goes still, teacup pausing a hair's breadth from her lips. Slowly, she sinks in her chair. Of course that's the part that gets through to her the most.
I've been too busy here to see much of the world. To really see it, Sakura told him. Yet her teammates and mentors have all spent years outside the village, putting their lives on pause in one way or another. Even Sasuke, though for him it hasn't always been a walk in the park. At least now he can wake up in the morning and go wherever he wants, do whatever he pleases. It's exactly why he must leave the village again—to preserve this hard-won freedom.
But Sakura has stayed behind, shoulders piled with responsibilities that only grow and grow. She's never given herself a break. Or perhaps no one has let her.
Her face lowers into her hands. "I'm tired." The words sound thick, like it's hard for her to admit.
"I'll get you something to eat," he mumbles, touching her shoulder. She's trembling. How did it get to this point? Why didn't someone do something sooner? Anger and shame heat Sasuke's face in quick succession. It's not like he was here to do anything.
"I think I need to take a nap first." Sakura stands, bleary-eyed. She looks like she's about to fall over. "Can you wake me up in an hour?"
He nods. "Go sleep."
In an hour, he knocks on her bedroom door as loud as he dares. Absolute silence greets him.
Fingers curl towards the doorknob, then hesitate. Should he?
He does some quick calculations. It's past dinner time for those operating on normal daylight hours—his own stomach is feeling hollow. Which means Sakura must be starving, even if she had time to eat the bento he packed.
With a mental shrug, Sasuke adopts the mentality of genin teammates shamelessly waking each other up for watch in the dead of night, and opens the door.
She's fast asleep, tangled between blankets. A light breeze and golden sunset light flow through the open window. This is the part where if he were a genin, he might march over and give her shoulder a rough shake. One step inside the room, his will goes soft.
"Sakura," he whispers.
She sighs, hand curling against her chest. Pink hair is strewn across her pillow like scattered flower petals.
He nudges her shoulder and quickly pulls away. "Aren't you hungry?"
The moment she stirs, blinking wearily, regret courses through him. Maybe he should have let her sleep.
"Oh, it's you." Her mouth stretches with a sleepy smile. "I thought I was in a dream."
"A bad dream?" he asks quietly.
"No," she mumbles, eyes sliding shut. "You're not in my bad dreams."
Sasuke's first instinct is to not believe her. And then remembers this is her time for honesty.
"Come eat," he says, kneeling down.
"Okay," she agrees. And burrows deeper into her blankets.
Her breathing grows even. He should make a decision—wake her up, or let her be. But he makes no move to do either of those things. He stays, leaning against her bed, and shuts his eyes.
His time here is ending, yet again, in a few short days.
For some time, a thought has been rising in Sasuke's mind like mist in a damp forest. It's been building so slowly, gently, that he hasn't noticed a thing.
Now the mist blankets everywhere he looks. It's the very air he breathes.
He wants to stay.
He wants to crawl into Sakura's bed right now, curl up in the safety of her embrace, and fall asleep. To stay. To not have to say goodbye to her again.
A light touch brushes his shoulder. He opens his eyes. Sakura's awake, looking at him, for how long he doesn't know.
"Did you sleep well?" he asks, perfectly tranquil, even as his chest is overcome with an aching hurt.
He's so good at denying himself what he wants.
Sakura hums a sleepy, affirmative noise. "Thanks for waking me."
"You give me too much credit," he mumbles. "I was about to give up."
A quiet giggle rolls out of her. She grasps a strand of his hair, fingers trailing down the length. "So long." His scalp tingles in pleasure as she tugs, softly. "Do you want me to cut it, before you go?"
Sasuke nods. Though in that moment, he might have agreed to anything she asked.
"I'll miss you," Sakura says, smile fading like daylight from the sky outside.
His voice feels rough in his throat. "I'm right here."
"I know," she whispers. A thumb ghosts over his cheekbone. "I'm so glad."
It overwhelms him, all that he wants.
Sasuke's mouth loosens helplessly. "You could come with me."
The hand on his cheek falls away as Sakura sits upright. Jade green eyes are clear and hard as a gemstone, all traces of sleep gone. "Are you serious?"
Upon reexamining his words, Sasuke finds no problem at all with what he said.
It doesn't really matter, how she responds. In fact he already knows what she'll say. Simply speaking the words releases an old, time-worn ache.
Still, he waits for her answer with bated breath.
"I…" She swallows. "I can't."
At the end, her voice raises up like a question. Her brow furrows like she's waiting for him to argue. It furrows even more when in response he gives a plain nod.
He stands. "There's noodles if you're still hungry."
After a short pause Sakura climbs out of bed, watching him carefully. Her lips are parted open like she's willing a sentence to leave her tongue.
He wants to kiss her.
It's just one more bone-wrenching desire that he tucks quietly away.
But what if it's something she wants?
Goosebumps rise everywhere on Sasuke's skin at the mere thought. Somehow that makes it different.
He makes a move towards the kitchen, to heat up dinner and then escape for some air. Something like that, how would he even know…?
Sakura snatches up his hand and pulls him to a halt. "Sasuke-kun."
Her mouth twists. His gaze pins dangerously to the curve of her cupid's bow. "Yes?"
"If I could…" Her fingers tangle with his, squeezing hard. "I would come with you."
Light bleeds around the cracks of a door that her words click open. A future, which might have been open to them, if not for the clock ticking down Sasuke's time left in the village. If not for the medical system happy to rest the bulk of its weight on a single person's shoulders.
Nothing has changed. But Sasuke can't help but smile. It would have been nice, waking up on a cold morning, Sakura curled up nearby. The leaves overhead.
"Another time," he says quietly.
Sasuke's quick, battle-honed reflexes falter as Sakura throws her arms around him. In his memory, her embrace has always lulled his pulse, soothed his breathing. But now, it makes his heart hammer in his chest. He feels exposed and disarmed, like an enemy has knocked away his last weapon.
Then intuition kicks in. His body knows what to do.
He pulls her tightly against his chest. Fits her head into the bend of his shoulder, lowers his face to her hair. Through the faint remnants of sharp antiseptic and too-sweet hospital soap, she smells like a warm, sun-filled field of jasmine.
Sakura's ribs rise and fall as she breathes out a quiet, content sigh, and Sasuke feels her body settle and relax against his. She wants him to hold her, to be this close. He feels unsteady and lighter than air.
Sakura's stomach chooses that moment to release a loud growl.
They peel apart, and Sasuke takes his first full breath in a while.
He's raced into war and life-threatening battles without batting an eye, but needs to muster his courage now to meet Sakura's gaze.
Clear green eyes soften, like a forest pool when the wind goes quiet. If he thinks about it, she's never given him a reason to feel afraid.
He digs a thumb into her abdomen and squeezes. "Hungry?"
She releases a shaky laugh. "I think so."
They take two bowls of noodles to the balcony and eat as the stars rise.
.
.
He's in the forest.
Moss, cool and soft, cradles his head. The weight of a pelvis pins him to the dewy ground. A curtain of rose colored hair brushes his cheek, jasmine flooding his nose.
A hand braces against his bare chest. Half-lidded green eyes gleam above him. Her hips roll. A wave of hot, slick pleasure blacks out Sasuke's vision. Again, and he's sinking, lost…
Sasuke jerks awake, breathless and with a shiver curling through his whole body. He feels his cock give a pulse. The sensations that linger are so vivid, so real, he could cum with the barest touch.
If he were alone, he wouldn't even hesitate.
A door opens down the hall and Sasuke jumps like he hasn't had a lifetime of shinobi training.
He slides deeper under the blanket, skin burning as if sweating out a fever. Why is she up at this hour?
Footsteps pad quietly down the hall. He squeezes his eyes shut, and fills his lungs with calm breaths like his life depends on it.
Sakura pours herself a glass of water at the kitchen sink. Minutes later, the door to her bedroom quietly shuts.
Sasuke melts back into his pillow. With a careful, practiced motion, he tucks the dream away to a distant corner of his mind.
These dreams have always visited him. Lately, though, ever since he began staying with Sakura, they've been incessant. Haunting him.
An owl coos somewhere in the darkness as Sasuke turns over to fight for sleep.
A shiver, a ghost touch, travels over his lips. He pulls away a strand of silky pink hair, that by some magic, ended up half in his mouth.
.
.
Two uneven stacks of paperwork weigh down the kitchen table. Night has fallen, and Sakura is on her second cup of coffee. She sets down her pen to briefly stretch her hands, then keeps scribbling.
"You're almost done?" Sasuke says. One pile has grown throughout the night while the other has dwindled to an encouraging size.
"What? No." Sakura shifts to reveal another mountainous stack hidden under the table. "I still have these."
He hopes her expectations aren't too high. "You'll never finish."
"I'm aware." She sighs and keeps working. "I'm always behind. It's fine."
Sasuke swipes a page from the pile on the floor. The text is small and dense, peppered with plenty of self-important-looking bolded headers and empty check boxes and lines for signatures. "Do I need to know much about ventilators to fill out a replacement form?"
"Not really, except that we need four of them."
"So I'll fill it out."
"You can try," Sakura shrugs, not looking up.
In a minute he adds his page to her pile.
Sakura breaks from her administrative fugue state. "What…are you doing?"
"Helping?" he mutters, and reaches for the next form.
Honestly, he's been looking for a distraction.
Sakura laughs, glances over his work, and abruptly stops laughing.
"Oh. You did this…very well." Her brows knit together. "Perfect, actually. But you don't have to do this, Sasuke-kun. It's late—you should go to bed. I know you haven't been sleeping well lately." A prickle of alarm runs like static down the back of Sasuke's neck. Sakura puts down her pen. She ignores all the pressing hospital matters scattered across the tabletop, and devotes all her valuable attention to him as she carefully asks, "Bad dreams?"
"No," he states, in a firm tone that he hopes leaves no room for further questioning.
The kettle sighs with the beginnings of a whistle. Sasuke jumps up to flick off the stove with a shiver of relief.
"Hot water?" he asks.
"Not yet."
He returns to his seat, lulled into a false sense of security.
The question drops like a grenade. "Do you want to talk about it?"
He cannot, under any circumstances, share the contents of his dreams with her.
In response, he snatches up her pen. "Do you want my help or not?"
A startled half-scowl rends Sakura's face. "I need that back."
Sasuke waits, giving her a chance. Then with no small amount of gloating, he removes a second pen from its perch behind her left ear, which she tucked there an hour ago and forgot about.
Sakura puffs a loud breath through her nose. "Don't look so amused." Her eyes trail back over to his completed paperwork. Perfect, she called it. "You really want to help?"
He clicks the end of the pen.
Sakura fixes him with a serious, determined look. "Okay. Here's what we'll do. You aren't allowed to look at patient forms—but anything about equipment replacement, staff onboarding and training, building management, or invoices, is all yours." She scrawls out her signature. "Memorize this."
Sasuke's sharingan flares in anticipation. "Should you be sharing this with a known war criminal?" In a blink, the deed is already done.
"I don't care who or what you are," her nose buries back into her work, "as long as you're helping me."
Two empty cups of coffee later, and Sasuke has learned a lot about the complexities of hospital paperwork processes. "You missed this section here." He points at the page under Sakura's hand. "On Form 4701K, you always need to check that box and initial here before flipping to Section G."
"I always miss that damn box," she mutters, pen moving with an angry flourish, "and then it comes straight back to my desk."
Sakura reaches for the next form, but the tabletop is empty.
Sasuke blinks off his sharingan. "Looks like we're done." His doujutsu really came in handy to pick out critical minute details and decode the convoluted work-flow each form demanded. And of course, his forgery of Sakura's signature is spot on.
As a reward, he steals a taste from Sakura's mug of instant coffee. She keeps a tin of the stuff on the same shelf as the stash of instant ramen. It's not particularly good, but he took a sip out of solidarity a few hours ago, and is still reaching for more.
She blinks slowly. "We…did it?"
Sasuke leans back in his chair, taking full possession of the coffee. "That wasn't so bad."
"We did it. I can't believe it." Shock and relief and joy pile one by one onto Sakura's face. "We're finished? I can sleep now?" As she spins to face him, her face settles upon a look of intense gratitude. "This is all thanks to you. You're the best!"
Sasuke shrugs a shoulder, and tries not to preen under the flood of warm recognition.
Jade eyes shine with a wistful light. "You're amazing…I could kiss you."
His reflexes are too sharp to allow him to drop the mug in his hand, but his fingers loosen enough that coffee nearly dribbles down one side.
"Do you want a job?" Sakura jumps topics with a dizzying flash and a dead-serious bat of the eye. "If so, you're hired. You have a real knack for administration."
"No thanks," he manages to respond, as she wobbles to her feet. Maybe she is so delirious from sleep deprivation she wasn't thinking about what she was saying. Or maybe, it's simply nothing to read into, and he is the delirious one? He's had a lot of coffee…his brain isn't great with stimulants…
"You should've never helped me."
"Hm?" he says, distracted.
"Now I'll never leave you alone!" Sakura is smiling as she plants a cool, swift kiss on his cheek. All of Sasuke's nerve endings sizzle up and catch aflame, unable to withstand the graze of calloused fingers to his jaw, the press of soft lips to the apple of his cheek, the scent of the coffee they both shared lingering on her breath—
Sakura's spine straightens very suddenly. "Good night." With a shake of pink hair, she spins on her heels and beelines for bed.
Alone at the kitchen table, Sasuke raises a hand to his cheek, adrenaline and caffeine burning through his veins, and wishes there was more paperwork to complete.
.
.
Morning light pours through the small bathroom window, the air thick with shower steam. Sasuke shakes open his folded shirt and frowns at the surprise line of buttons running down the front. He doesn't own anything with buttons.
Judging from the slippery, synthetic fabric, which Sasuke usually avoids, the shirt must belong to Naruto. It probably wound up in his laundry while he was still crashing with the dobe. Clearly he wasn't paying much attention in the rush to pack and vacate his apartment. There's a couple items he thinks he's missing.
He would stop by, but one day last week a padlock appeared on his door. Not that a padlock is really enough to stand in his way. But the apartment already feels frozen to him, distant. Somewhere he can't go back to anymore.
Sasuke unbuttons the shirt with exceptional difficulty, muttering a curse when he needs to resort to the help of his teeth. The fabric is too slippery to grasp properly, the buttonholes nearly microscopic, but he manages and shrugs it over his shoulders. A temporary solution, until he can root through his own belongings. He'd rather not walk shirtless through the apartment—again—if he can help it.
He pads barefoot into the hall. Sakura's bedroom door is open, and she's changing the sheets inside. She reaches to tuck in a far corner, and the hem of her nightgown rides up over smooth, toned legs. His throat goes dry.
"Morning," he says.
Sakura turns at his voice, wearing the beginnings of a smile.
"Hi—"
Green eyes dart to the plane of bare skin visible through his unfastened shirt. Sasuke didn't mean to let the front hang open so boldly, but his hand still seems to be frozen on the doorknob.
"Hi," she says again.
"Can you button this?" he hears his voice saying.
In truth, this step is the easiest. He can manage on his own. And yet he asks anyway, without any remorse.
Sakura shifts off the edge of her bed, leaving the last corner untucked.
Slowly and carefully, she fastens the first set of buttons. Fingertips graze his chest as she reaches for the next.
"Sorry." Her eyes lower, long lashes tipped with gold in the sunlight.
"It's fine," he says.
Her hands evenly work their way down.
It might not be fine.
He fumbles for a string of conversation. "When's your shift?" he asks, though by now he knows well that she runs out the door around noon and returns anywhere from eight to forty-eight hours later.
"I'm not going in today."
He's surprised enough to not even think about her fastening the last button above his naval. "You're not?"
"Nope. I sent a message this morning." Sakura touches his elbow when she's finished working, and Sasuke's fingers reach absentmindedly to twist the first button. "Shizune will cover my rounds. I rescheduled two surgeries and three meetings," she rattles off, cinching a bathrobe around her waist. "No one's on paperwork but it can wait a bit now that I have you! I'm having the interns cover the budget presentation…"
Here they both wince. Sakura, maybe second-guessing her interns' presentation skills, and Sasuke, because just one of Sakura's work days is quite literally busier than his entire month.
"It's too much to leave to the interns, isn't it?" she worries, completely misreading his expression. "Maybe I should be there—"
"No," he says. "You shouldn't."
"No," she repeats.
"You just worked another week of double-shifts," he reminds her.
Sakura's hands squeeze into fists. "I did!" The promise of rest has her looking brighter and more solid than he's seen her in days, though the set of her shoulders still seems weary. Jade eyes slide to his. "Do you have plans today?"
A hand grips Sasuke's heart. "No."
Triumph washes over Sakura's face. "Then you'll have time for a checkup!"
He scowls, but really it's his own fault for missing the trap.
.
.
Sakura's face fills his vision, her scent sweet and dizzying like he's buried his nose in a cluster of jasmine, her light touch pinning him in place.
The cool circle of a stethoscope travels over his ribs. "Breathe in for me?"
Sasuke does his best to suck in a steady breath. She frowns, which doesn't make him feel great about the attempt. He shuts his eyes and tries to relax into the cushions of the couch.
"Good," she says.
Her hand moves over his heart. Sasuke blinks with a jolt. Now her eyes are closed, listening.
"A little high," she notes.
He presses his lips together. "Why can't we have breakfast first?"
Sakura swings the stethoscope over her shoulders, where it glints out of place against the pink fuzz of her bathrobe. "Because I know you'll find a way to stall."
He huffs, mostly because she's right.
"Well—a high resting heart rate is likely not an issue," she declares. "It's the same for a lot of individuals with a high level of chakra." Sasuke feels his chakra give a sudden roil as he wonders how many of Sakura's patients suddenly possess a "high level of chakra" when in proximity to her. "Still, I wish we were at the hospital. I'd love to take a blood sample, run a few more tests…maybe tomorrow?" She eyes him hopefully.
A blood sample? "No." He tries and fails to cross his arms. "This is good enough."
"Just one quick blood test?"
Sasuke shivers with the memory of dozens of senbon piercing his skin. The chill of an underground lab, purple liquid spurting from the tip of a syringe before a rough hand shoves it into the meat of his arm. "...don't like needles," he mumbles.
"Sorry. Forget it." Her voice is apologetic. "Do you want to stop here?"
"It's fine. Keep going."
"Okay. We're almost done." She kneels to the floor, gaze level with his stump. "How's the arm?"
"Good."
"Any pain or discomfort?"
"No."
"Phantom pain?" she presses.
He hesitates. "Sometimes."
"That counts as pain, you know." A chakra-laden hand hovers slowly over his left arm and shoulder, leaving a trail of buzzing warmth on his skin. "Everything seems normal. Phantom pain should fade on its own, eventually." Her face hardens. "But if it ever flares back worse than before, you need to tell me."
"Aa," he grunts immediately. She's wearing a scary look for someone still in her pajamas.
A green wisp lights the tip of her fingers. "Can I look at your eyes?"
Sasuke's eyelids immediately slide shut, in anticipation of the melting touch he knows is coming.
Fingertips land on either temple, and all his muscles relax like he's sinking into sleep. When she touches him like this, his body seems to give up years of stored and hidden pain. He's too far-gone to care as he feels himself list to the side.
A steady hand curls behind his skull, catching him in his slow fall. For a long, quiet block of time, Sasuke drifts, letting Sakura support the weight of his head.
Beneath closed eyes, a light dances as his ears just barely pick up a hushed voice. "Good?"
"Mmmmm," is the only noise his throat can produce.
He receives a small, sweet hum in return, like she's smiling. "Any problems?"
Sasuke reluctantly cracks open his eyes. As much as he wants to keep them shut, lean further into her touch, he wants even more to watch her expression in this next moment.
"I get a blind spot, sometimes," he mentions, casually. "During migraines."
Sakura's face doesn't change, but she's bent close enough that he feels, for one instant, as her breathing pauses.
"One eye or both?"
"Just the right, I think." The rinnegan troubles him in other ways.
Her touch lifts away, and Sasuke almost wishes he kept silent.
She nods evenly. "I see." Her chest rises with a breath. "Well, your eyes are looking healthy, even the optic nerve, though it's seen some damage—"
Sakura dives into a clear explanation of migraines and triggers and something about eye blood vessels that would probably be very helpful, if Sasuke were listening.
He's absorbing other things. The cute, eager twitch of her lips as she starts speaking. The steady confidence of her voice as she shares the obscure knowledge she studied who knows how long ago, on the off chance it might benefit him one day.
Sasuke feels a pull inside his chest, and the knot of his heart loosens, loosens, and unravels.
"—so although I'm sure it's not a very comfortable experience, ocular migraines are usually short-lived and cause no lasting damage to the eye. An episode shouldn't last more than an hour, at the very longest—so just monitor them, and please tell me if anything changes." Sakura removes her stethoscope, and all at once she morphs from esteemed doctor to tired girl, who's carried many worries for many years. Who's worried about him for many years. "Promise?"
"I promise," he echoes quietly.
"Do you have any questions?"
Sasuke shakes his head. He's learned everything he needed to know.
Sakura holds out a hand. He takes it, letting her pull him to his feet.
"Thank you." His throat hurts, the words heavier than he anticipated. "So much."
"I didn't know it was worrying you like that." Sakura's brow furrows. "Do you feel better now?"
"Much better," he mumbles.
He needs only to tilt down his head the barest distance, a light tree branch bowing under a bird's weight, for his lips to touch her brow—
A sudden spike of chakra and Sasuke's muscles seize. He snuffs out all signs of his presence just as Sakura shoves him out of view of the balcony's glass doors. Seconds later, feet land with well-trained, deadly silence on the metal railing.
Sasuke darts through the kitchen as the gloved hand of an Anbu agent raps sharply on the glass.
"Wait!" Sakura cries at the ceiling. "I'm not dressed!" Her chakra flares, flooding out any last traces of his.
He takes shelter in the safety of Sakura's bedroom and presses his ear to the door.
"Haruno-san. Your presence is required at the hospital."
"I'm not on call today," comes Sakura's voice. "I left instructions to contact Shizune-san in the case of an emergency."
"Apologies. This is not a request."
Sakura's chakra is so thick in the air that he feels it muddy with disappointment.
The voice continues, too low to follow. He hears clearly as Sakura sighs. "Very well."
The looming presence of the Anbu disappears like a popped bubble. Wood creaks in the hallway under soft footsteps. Sasuke leans back as the door swings open.
"Did you hear?" she asks.
"More or less," he says.
"I'm sorry, Sasuke-kun." Her voice drips with true regret. "I really wanted to spend this day with you."
Sasuke can't hide his frustration. "Can't they bother someone else?"
"I suppose not." Her shoulders are tense as she shrugs. "It shouldn't take too long. An hour or two, at the latest."
Sasuke sighs. "Go."
An hour stretches easily into two, which stretches into all remaining daylight hours.
Just past sunset, Sakura slinks through the door, quiet and dead on her feet. Rubbing her eyes, her body sways in the direction of the couch.
Sasuke's spine straightens. "Okaeri."
Sakura blinks like she's just noticing him on the couch, sitting in the exact spot where she was about to keel over. "Taidama."
Sasuke sets down the scroll he's been reading. "How was it?"
"An S-rank went wrong. It was a tough one. Blood everywhere." She slumps next to him and doesn't offer any other specifics. "But—I've trained my team well. Very well. They're skilled and competent. They could have handled it without me."
"Why didn't they?"
"It's not up to them. In the end, the hospital board has the final say on what I do. They even approve my time-off. Well, deny it, usually."
Sasuke has a suspicious inkling. "Who's on the board?"
"Retired doctors, donors," Sakura glances at him, "current and former members of the council."
"They don't want to let go of you," he muses.
"What do you mean?"
"You're valuable to them. Because of you, shinobi live on to serve the village instead of dying on their S-ranks. The council has more lives to do its bidding. And the village grows more powerful."
Sakura chews her lips, her gaze distant. "Healing isn't about power."
"It shouldn't be, but look at this place."
He has no doubt the village would rather wring Sakura dry than relinquish any control of her.
Green eyes droop, fighting sleepy blinks. "You know, sometimes I fall asleep right here after a shift." She fondly pats the cushion of the couch. "But now that it's your spot, I have to make it all the way to my bed." A wry smile washes over her tired face.
"You can still sleep here," he says. "Ignore me."
Sakura lowers her head onto the dip of his pillow. "You're not so easy to ignore." A few moments later, her breathing evens out.
Sasuke stares at her, curled up with her head inches from the edge of his lap, and keeps completely still, lest she stirs and moves away.
An hour later he wakes up to a pounding knock.
A blanket falls off his shoulders as he sits up. He's certain he didn't have one before. Sakura's gone, in her place a fluffed pillow. The shower is running.
The knock continues, so erratic and enthusiastic Sasuke already knows a certain member of Team 7 is back from his trip. He answers the door.
Naruto is carrying two bottles of alcohol in one fist, the other frozen in midair. "Teme?"
He yawns. "Hey."
Eyebrows raise up to his hairline. "Where's Sakura-chan?"
"Showering."
Naruto's mouth hangs open with a little too much amusement. "Oh?"
Sasuke snaps awake. "No."
"I didn't say anything! I was learning all about diplomacy in Sand—"
"A lot has happened," he cuts in. It's well past time to catch the dobe up to speed.
Naruto's entertained grin springs back. "Like what?"
Sasuke's losing his patience. "I was evicted."
"What? Why? What did you do, burn down the place?"
He glares. "I refused the mission."
Guilt sets in the lines of Naruto's face. "Oh. That's…that's not good."
"Just come in." Sasuke leaves the door open and shoves the array of pillows and blankets to one side of the couch.
Naruto sets down the glass bottles with a disjointed clink and falls back silent into the cushions. His nose wrinkles as anger sets in. "Sorry, teme."
"I suppose it's my own fault?" he bites.
"It's not! I didn't say that. They can't just kick you out for no stupid reason. I'll talk to Kakashi!"
"I already talked to him. It's out of his hands."
Naruto drums knuckles on his thigh, unsatisfied. "There has to be a solution."
Sasuke seethes. "You think if a solution existed, I wouldn't find it myself? They want me gone. That's it."
Naruto's reply sounds damp. "So what are you gonna do?"
"I'm…leaving." The words feel thin and unsure on his tongue.
"When are you leaving?"
Sasuke shrugs a brittle shoulder. "Soon."
"Where are you going?"
Outside, colorful rooftops gleam in the setting sun. "West?" he spitballs before Naruto's impassive face. "Maybe south?"
Doubtful blue eyes dig into him. "Might as well throw north and east in there while you're at it, teme."
"What would you have me do, then? This isn't easy."
"I'm sorry, I know. I'm just…really mad." Naruto sighs. "How long have you been here?"
The water running in the background turns off. "Longer than I should."
Naruto's voice lowers. "I take it you and Sakura are doing better."
"Yeah," he mumbles. "We're okay."
The statement is quite underwhelming, in the grand scheme of things, but Naruto's eyes bug out as if Sasuke just uttered earth-shattering news.
"I want details."
"There are no details."
"Sure, sure." Naruto twists to take a closer look at him. Whatever he sees makes him look harder. "How are you doing? Be honest."
"I'm…" Sasuke finds it hard to speak, hard to look up. "I was hoping for more time."
The bathroom door opens. Both of their heads snap over.
Naruto inhales to his full lung capacity. "SAKURA-CHAN!"
It's exactly the diversion Sasuke needs in order to wrestle his expression back under control.
Out of sight, Sakura makes a startled noise. "Naruto! You scared me!"
"Sasuke let me in!" he yells, too close to Sasuke's ear. "I brought booze!"
"Oh!" A smile shifts into her voice. "Give me a minute!"
Naruto shifts to a normal indoor voice with jarring ease. "So, do you have everything you need? Money, clothes?"
"Probably not." Sasuke shrugs. "They locked up my old place. Most of my things are there."
"I can help out, if you want. I have my training stipend now." Naruto's offer is sincere even though Sasuke knows just how small that stipend is. He's broke and always has been. There's a reason Sasuke has sponsored nearly every Ichiraku's visit in living memory.
"It's okay," he says. "I'll make do."
"There is one option left." Blond eyebrows wag. "We go back to your place."
"It's locked," Sasuke repeats.
"And? Kick down the door."
He sighs. "I don't feel like it."
Bare feet pad quietly into the living room. "Don't feel like what?"
"Sakura!" Naruto tackles Sakura into a hug with what seems like the earnest goal of toppling her over, but she succeeds in standing firm. "We're breaking into Sasuke's apartment."
"We are? Why?" Dark pink hair drips wet over one shoulder. Looking between her two guests, she beams.
"A very serious reason," Naruto declares. "Fun."
"It's been a long day…" Sakura raises one foot to rub the back of her calf. "I could use some fun."
"If we're going, now's the time." Sasuke loops his left sleeve into a loose knot. "Civilians are still at work. If we're lucky, the floor should be empty. Sakura, you can pick the lock. I'll stay back until we're clear."
Only after he's laid out the entire plan does he realize he's completely given in. Well, it would be nice to take in the view, scour the place one last time for anything important.
"I'll distract any onlookers," Naruto pipes up.
"Fine." He shoots the dobe a glare. "Otherwise, stay quiet."
"You can also carry the alcohol," Sakura says.
"Quietly," Sasuke adds.
"HEY! Quit acting like I don't know how"—at their faces, Naruto's shout drops to a whisper—"to be quiet."
The seventh floor is utterly empty as the three shinobi sneak out. Sakura picks the padlock with a hairpin held in steady, surgery-trained hands, and that ends the easiest mission they've ever embarked on.
The apartment is dark and a layer of dust is building on the floors that Sasuke always mopped clean each week. It feels like he's been away far longer than he has. His teammates' gazes linger stealthily on his back, but really, they shouldn't be worried. There are no bad memories here, unlike other abandoned places he's returned to.
Sasuke ventures deeper inside and reacquaints himself with the rest of his small wardrobe. His favorite cloak is spread out on his bed, waiting to be folded and packed in his bag. The warm, weatherproof fabric is perfect for traveling. He didn't even realize he left it behind.
He treads into the kitchen. Pink hair parts around the nape of Sakura's neck as she bends over something, so focused she doesn't notice him pause behind her.
He drapes the cloak over one shoulder. "Sakura?"
She turns, hip bumping lightly against an open kitchen drawer. "I'm sorry." Her face is startled and pinched with guilt. "I was looking for a bottle opener."
Her hands are cupped, like holding a baby bird, around a stack of letters.
Something else he didn't mean to leave behind.
"I told you I read them." He sees no reason to be indirect.
Green eyes pin him in place like the sun in an open field. No cover, nowhere to hide.
"You kept them." Her voice trembles with something weak.
The tips of his ears begin to burn. "Why wouldn't I?"
This statement only seems to deepen whatever emotion is at play on Sakura's face.
He scrambles for a defense, for something to fling back at her. "You knew about my migraines." The words shoot from his tongue like an accusation. "You were researching them. I saw your notes."
"I—" Sakura's mouth pops open, surprised and a little guilty, as if caught doing something far worse than idle diagnostic research. "That was just a guess! I didn't know."
"I was gone for so long," he insists. "But you still did it."
Sakura's brow furrows. "I was thinking about you."
Sasuke touches the stack of letters in her hands. "I was thinking about you."
The words hang in his vision for a moment like bright afterimages. He's wanted to say this for some time. She's made it easy for him.
A strange pounding noise erupts from the living room, followed by a shattering pop almost as loud as Naruto's shout.
"Sakura! I got it open!"
Sasuke pieces together what he just heard—a glass bottle being hit against his furniture.
"Hey!" His head snaps to the right. "Don't break anything!"
"Why? You don't live here anymore!"
He's right, but Sasuke's still annoyed. "I said don't!"
A cool, soft touch strokes his cheek, and a bundle of letters pass into his hand. "Here." Sakura brushes past, the corners of her eyes crinkled in a smile.
Sasuke clutches the letters tighter, then follows after her.
.
.
.
.
Notes:
with the publishing of this chapter, soft day is officially my longest published fic :') thank you so much for reading and for all your support!