Author's Notes: Originally a dumb oneshot-for-fun (cuz im not a writer lol) I made while on vacation. Now I may have accidentally expanded it to a world of its own. Altho this isn't the first time my dumb idea went frenzy mode, this is the actual first one where I actually DID write something down. And I kinda had fun writing this so, uh… here ya go.

Disclaimer: I don't own any rights to these characters. I'm just a lonely adult obsessed with the SSB franchise.

(11 JUL 2023) UPDATE: I've decided to fuse chapters 2-3 and 4-5 into 2 and 3, respectively, cuz (a) the word count kept getting shorter and; (b) I realized that they flowed better that way. I also reworked some of the wording from said chapters including chapter 1. Sorry for the sudden change. For old readers before this major update who don't wanna reread through the whole thing again, we stopped at the end of chapter 3.

Also, I will attempt to do a chapter recap thing at the beginning of every chapter (in the notes portion). Kinda like how they used to do with the classic shounen anime lmao. But unlike those infamous anime recaps, these shouldn't take half the page (hopefully).

Chapter 1: Going Off the Rails

It was a nice and quiet afternoon for the calm folk of Smashville. Fletchlings are chirping cheerfully in the clear skies and the air is just at the right humidity. Dancing along with the quaint village's feet were the neatly maintained grass along with patches of poppies and daisies, with a few of variants of roses as extras. Of course, there were roads but they were hardly ever busy, even during most of the holidays. It had had to be the best Saturday afternoon to walk with your pet dog, thought the psychic blonde. Lucas had been looking forward to spending the rest of the peaceful afternoon with his best friend and emotional support, Boney the choco lab, after a long day of chores. On his neat, green tee with a leash at hand, the young psychic took off to breathe in the undisturbed air.

Instead of the fresh air, however, he is assaulted with the thickest of the gaseous pollutant that would've killed him on the spot if he were asthmatic. After a brief session of coughing and wiping off tears (plus Boney checking on him), he looks to see if he could still catch the sight (and, hopefully, the identity) of the fiend behind such an act. To his dismay, he sees a familiar foursome of brightly-colored-haired teenagers speeding on what looked like a bundle of bounded wheeled crates tied into a yellow motorcycle. Lucas huffs in frustration; of course, it had to those rowdy teens again! Them and their dumb antics, he thought, running away from cops in their makeshift train down the road. Typical teenager behavior.

...right?

Lucas blinks his eyes repetitively before he shakes his head to double-check what he had just witnessed. Normally, those teenager had their dumb antics that were generally annoying, but to stir up the cops? That was unusual for them, he thought. What the hell did they do this time around? And what of the wheeled crates tied to the motorcycle? The blonde shakes his head one more time, just in case he hadn't tried hard enough to wake up from this dream (more like nightmare), before he proceeds to run off, along with Boney, to check on the teenagers. Purely out of curiosity, he says.

Roy had always prided himself for his ability to plan ahead. While he wasn't cunning and calculating like Robin or his twin or overly diligent to the core like Marth, he's still generally a smart person who typically had a layout of plans ahead of him. Roy also believed he was flexible; his plans were never concrete, they just had enough leeway to account for unaccounted variables should it directly affect his plans. But Roy is also adventurous. The redhead loved exploring unconventional options when given the opportunity, which is nearly all the time. In other words, he is an experimental person. In other-other words (mainly Ike's), he is the smartest idiot you could ask for; purposefully doing the correct things incorrectly. In most days, no matter how derailed the journey would get, he'd still be able to pull through his plans to the end.

This was not one of those days.

"Don't vehicular stuff like this have BREAKS or something?!" Behind the redhead was the usually-cool-headed Ike. He yelling through the cacophony of the winds violently rushing through the swordsmen trio plus a crying Corrin. This panic really wasn't surprising, considering the compromising position everyone was in at the moment. The bandana-bluehead is currently holding on to the hopefully-sturdy rope, which is stringing a motorcycle and a bundle of bounded wheeled crates like a makeshift train, with one arm and the distressed Corrin over his other. Meanwhile, said manakete had pinned herself into the crates with her draconic claws out of sheer panic. She had not shown any signs of letting go.

Roy notices his other friend, Lucina, attempt to turn her head to respond to Ike. The attempt couldn't go as far as she wanted without falling off the speed demon, that is, the motorcycle that she and Roy were sharing. She was, however, able to yell out her response at the same volume as Ike's, "Our benefactor said he'll break US if we touch it." Had it not been for the volume of her voice, Roy would not have noticed the panic in the otherwise deadpanned blunette's voice.

"'the hell is THAT supposed to mean!? Aren't those stuff supposed to—I don't know—SAVE LIVES?!" Ike is feeling more than jittery now, and Roy wishes he could do the same. Unfortunately, as the "brains" of the group that he inadvertently assembled, he is required to maintain his cool-headedness (the best way he can, at least) and formulate a back-up to the back-up plan. Roy briefly pauses to think about it. He needed to backtrack to see what had really gone wrong so he could try to set it straight — not right, just straight. He'll figure out the rest along the way.

For starters, Roy remembers to himself and Lucina had offered volunteer on helping on an upcoming tournament called "Nook 'em Out." It was a smaller scaled one, ran by the local Nook's Cranny as a fundraiser of sorts. Although small-scaled, the tournament provided side events and games outside of the main course to mainly to boost interest for Smash in the Smashville community. While neither of the two have ran a full tourney on their own, both have extensively assisted Marth when he ran one in Regna Ferox. Nevertheless, the sword duo were more than ecstatic to help when the little Nook twins, Timmy and Tommy, practically ran into them and begged. Right now, Roy and Lucina were supposed to deliver a bundle of items for said side events from a provider Timmy Nook had apparently contacted. Instead, they are now both on the run from the cops with their bundle of items, all contained in the wheeled crates Ike and Corrin are desperately clinging unto, in tow.

He smiles for a moment, thinking about oddly comforting it is to know that he is getting chased over and could potentially die for doing something he loved. Competitive Smash was something he was very passionate about. From the thrill of the games themselves, to the camaraderie formed between competitors with a nice blend of drama and sportsmanship; he absolutely adored them. Lucina, likewise, had shared how hard she had fallen in love with the niche side of Smash, and it had been what had driven her to try her hand to rise to the top of ranks.

Unfortunately, he gets his thoughts side tracked when he hears an even louder cry out from Corrin. "WE GOING TO DIE," she squeaks. Roy looks behind him to see Ike still holding on to the silver haired manakete, before he feels a sensation at the back of his hand. He immediately felt jitters ran through his spine. The way her calloused but slender fingers stride through the whitened knuckles of the redhead was akin to have been grazed by the angel's lips. The warmth sensation he feels over Lucina's touch was an unexpected surprise but a welcome one. Maybe... Perhaps tapping into this unrealized longing for her touch until his last moments was certainly a strong way to go...before Lucina proceeds to crush his fingers and violently jerking them to another direction.

Right. He has the handlebars of the motorbike. He should really focus on steering the damn thing.

"Eyes on the road. We're not dying here," Lucina commands.

Roy couldn't stop himself from rolling his eyes even if he tried. But she was right. They were warriors born and raised for war. Ending their journey here would not only be embarrassing but also insulting to their name. In an instant, the fire within the redhead had been rekindled alight. So, without keeping his eyes off the road, he asks, "How many? And are they armed?"

The first response he received was an 'Eep!' from Corrin, unsurprisingly. Short after, the elder bluehead answers, "2 cars. No bullets fired yet, so I think they're using paralyzers."

Roy feels Lucina trying to make some kind of moving around the tight position they both are in. He doesn't try to disturb her, however, he needed to focus. After some more shuffling, he can now feel Lucina's back pressed into his.

Lucina takes a deep sigh, then she looks forward to see the concerned look of Ike and the distressed Corrin. "Okay, so we can't attack them. Or rather, we shouldn't initiate an attack," she states a matter-of-factly.

Ike nods in response. Provoking their aggressors weren't going to get them out of this. They needed something defensive, or persuasive, or any kind of -sive that didn't indicated aggression.

Fortunately, or unfortunately to Ike, the redhead suddenly pops out a, "Guys, I've got a plan!"

"Is it a good plan? Or...?" The taller bluehead asks cautiously.

"Well, it certainly is a plan!" Roy answers with enthusiasm as fiery as his hair. "We'll just have to take them with us to Nook's Cranny."

"And indict the children?!"

"Ike, wait," Lucina halts Ike from further protests. "The twins might be able to explain better for us." While she doesn't agree with Roy's unorthodox methods most of the time, she is able to put enough trust in him to let him do his thing. Besides, it's not as if they had a better option available right now.

The bluehead stops for a moment to consider it. They can't run away from the cops forever, plus the motorbike only has so much gas left. Furthermore, any attempts to stop and explain themselves has probably been nullified because... well, no good decision had ever been made from panic. He turns his cobalt eyes to the shaking manakete; she wasn't even meant to be in this mess.

"Sure! I can help for a bit," hops in the ever-so friendly dragon. "Kamui's place is just along the path anyway, so I won't be late at all, sir!" She does a mock salute as she says so. Ike tilts his head to the side as a sign of concern before shaking his head. He can't seem to shake off the feeling that this was a bad idea somehow. Corrin notices this, so she gives him a light jab on his elbow with her own before planting her chin on his bicep as she looks up unto his deceptively cold cobalt eyes. "I can lift 40kg on one hand juuuust fine, Ikey~! I won't fall behind you THAT bad!" She gives an innocent chuckle before hopping off into the direction of where Roy had parked his lent bike.

Ike responds with a short sigh. It wasn't that he had no faith in Corrin at all, it was more so in Roy. Or, rather, Roy's 'supplier.' He couldn't get it off his head: first, Roy's employer claims they were short of supplies so they ask him which of the events should they cut; less than a day after, said employer claims they received a mysterious sponsor (he dubbed "Mr. Supplier") that were willing to supply their small tourney all the way from Diamond City; after which, Mr. Supplier claims they can't deliver their stuff directly to Smashville, so Roy and Lucy would have to meet them halfway to bring those supplies home themselves.

There was absolutely no way that word of that Nook-something tournament got outside of Smashville, let alone this so-called 'Diamond City.' Ike himself hadn't even heard of this tournament either until Lucina asked him for assistance, and he lived barely outside of Smash City, a good 20km from Smashville!

'It's the spirit of the tourney, Ike,' claimed Roy. 'No Smasher would ever will to let a tournament die!'

First of all, nobody said this supplier was a licensed Smasher! Second of all, where the hell even is this 'Diamond City?!' Fourside would've been a more believable lie! And lastly, why the hell did Mr. Supplier stay anonymous then?! This whole thing is the very definition of suspicious!

"And yet, you didn't choose to back out when we gave you the option?" Lucina asks with a raised eyebrow. Clearly, she found amusement in Ike's response — the contradiction between his opinions and his actions.

"Well, I wasn't gonna leave you idiots in the dust." The taller bluehead scratches the back of his head. Sometimes, he wonders why he'd even bother with his doubts if he was only going to ignore them anyway. It is almost as if he had been programmed to fight for his friends. "Besides, what else were you going to about it? Mr. Supplier's... well... supplies actually arrived anyway, and they were bulkier than what your toothpick arms anticipated."

The reply Ike got was a hearty chuckle, but it wasn't hard to tell that Lucina was more than grateful to her friend. No matter how serious or dumb a request can be, he is more than willing to lend a helping hand. She couldn't have asked for a more reliable friend. "Let me tell you what, Ike," the shorter blunette starts, "if things go abysmal — and I MEAN abysmal — you're more than welcome to kill Roy."

'I'm going to kill Roy,' was the immediate thought that struck Ike as soon as he returned to the present.

Although, as much as he wishes to accomplish just that, Ike knows they have to get out of this situation somehow. Only THEN he can kill that drat redhead. "Okay, fine. Explain the plan or you're dead."

Roy gives what could be described as a guffaw. He points his fingers to himself and Lucina before redirecting them forward. "WE," he emphasizes himself and Lucina, "are going to do all the talking once we reach there." He was likely referring to Nook's place that last part.

Ike waits for further explanation but when he receives none, he sighs, "Okay. And? What can I do?"

Roy doesn't answer. He very likely hadn't thought of anything further than that. The blunette behind him answers for him, though, "Just make sure not to open the crates whatsoever. We don't know what we're carrying, whether if they are dangerous or not could very much change our entire situation. They could potentially be explosives, and therefor signal that we're hostile."

The taller bluehead nods. Again, don't poke the aggressors. The most damage they've done to the crates were Corrin's claws, but the boxes are surprisingly thicker than expected, so he surmised that it shouldn't affect them. He believes that if he behaves, then maybe their overall problem would deescalate in a short time. He just kinda wished he knew what had initiated the whole chase anyway.

...which begs the question...

"Why the hell are we getting chased anyway?"

This time, Lucina fails to answer. They've been on the run for what felt like an hour (it was probably only about 10 minutes). All that she remembered was that Roy suggested they string the crates to the bike like a train because they weren't provided the truck that was promised — not like they had licenses for that anyway. That last bit did, however, jug up a possible answer. "Do you think we're in trouble, not because of the crates, but is because of our driving set-up?"

Ike looks up at the girl as if she had grown another head. "Lucy-dear, I love you, you are a great friend of mine, and I would be more than willing to save your life at the expense of mine. But what the HELL are you talking about?!" Just like for Roy, Ike wasn't really a believer in Lucina's ideas either, although to a lesser extent. "Speeding, sure. But a D.I.Y. train? Haven't heard of that crime anywhere!"

However, before Lucina could further explain her stance, the whole group is thrown a harsh leftwards as Roy ambitiously drifts a sharp right turn. The whole 'train' fortunately survives this stunt. As Lucina recovers from the whiplash, she notices Ike clutching on his wrist rather than holding Corrin. Wincing at the pain of her friend, she turns with the intention of scolding the driver. Instead, the whole ride stops to a screeching halt just before a familiarly quaint garage. It was Nook's Cranny back storage.

The redheaded boy heaves before inspecting the train-wreck and his friends behind him. Lucina is faring decently well outside of her disheveled...everything. After that, he turns his ocean blue eyes towards the unfortunate pair on the crates. Ike is clutching on his left wrist, but is overall only slightly worse than Lucina. Corrin is still-shaken and, fortunately, conscious. She's faring only barely better than Ike. He finally looks down to check on himself; he is met with a sweat-covered mess he called clothes while littered with specks of insect blood. All in all, other than Ike's injury, things were a lot better than he anticipated.

Before he got to check on Ike, however, Roy is halted by none other than the persistent men of authority that have been chasing them all afternoon.

"Freeze! Don't move or we'll shoot!" Commands a heavy-geared officer, which Roy assumes was a Gunner Mii. The foursome of teenagers are, then, surrounded by the Miis shortly after.

The redhead raises his arms to show his surrender; he didn't wish to cause any more trouble, especially for Ike and Corrin. Lucina, left with much choice, followed suit.

"We were just volunteers following orders, officer! We had no idea!" Roy yelps triumphantly.

Ike would've facepalm right now if he could, but he chooses to remain still. Who knows what would happen to them should they decide on things through panic again? Plus, he worries Corrin would snap into her frenzied-dragon state if she were to be triggered any further. Besides, if Roy's plan is to be believed, all he had to do was wait for a third-party to arrive and rescue them.

To that—with timing as if the gods above were watching a sitcom— did the voice of said third-party arrive.

But to their surprise, the outside voice wasn't that of the Nook twins. Instead, it is a familiar voice that, Roy once described, could serenade gods if he tried enough.

"They speak of the truth, officers. They had no idea at all."

Both the group of teens and the surrounding cops face their heads to turn to the direction of the voice.

It was Marth.