Peter's head aches with the sudden overflow of memories.
When had he passed out?
Where has his brother's phone gone? When did he lose it? Mama and Papa, no, Finland and Sweden, why didn't they come back for him? His friends, how were they? Was Wy and Hutt River still okay? What about the cheerful Seborga or eccentric Kugelmugel or the gentle-but-tough-acting Molossia?
Do they think he's dead? Are they-?
"Peter, buddy, you okay?"
Alfred's too-cheerful voice cuts through Peter's thoughts, but Peter can't even see his face through his wet eyes. Peter shakes his head, trying to swallow around the lump in his throat.
"I remember."
He remembers everything,from the first day to the current one. He remembers seeing the world slowly lose its sanity, and the crimes humans had committed against each other. Even a country born in war like Sealand had never seen the likes of such cruelty and violence. Torture, murder, cannablism, sacrifice. He remembers seeing the world slowly go insane around him, while everyone else grew older and died, and only Sealand lived, alone and afraid and hiding who he was.
More than than that, he remembers true identity of the family who never came for him.
"My Mama and Papa," Is that really his voice, so low and shaky? "Finland and Sweden... Are they okay?"
He regrets the question as soon as he asks it. He's not sure any answer he can get is a good one. James sounds confused as he answers.
"Sweden and Finland? The Nordics? How-?"
He stops suddenly. Alfred sounds just as confused.
"But they-"
"Move."
Mathew shoves Alfred out of the way, taking his spot by Peter's side, and Peter desperately tries to dry his tears so he can read Mathew's expression. Mathew's expression is unbearably soft.
"Is that who you were waiting for, Peter?"
Peter already knows he won't like the answer. Even so, he still wants to hear it. He clenches the blanket covering him tightly, trying to find comfort in a world without any, and nods.
Mathew's voice is just as soft as his face when he answers.
"Oh, Peter."
Peter stiffen at the unexpected contact as he's pulled into an unexpected hug. Mathew speaks into his hair, sending chills down his spine.
"You weren't abandoned Peter. The sickness-"
And now that Peter wants to cry more than anything, more than ever before, the tears refuse to come.
"They...the nordics got the sickness pretty bad, Peter. And they-" Mathew falters on his words, but presses forwards anyways, "They didn't make it. I'm sorry."
And Peter's whole world falls apart.
The answer he'd always known, but secretly hoped was wrong, the answer he couldn't face. A truth that was easier to forget than to accept. The world had ended a long time ago, and it took with it everything that Peter loved. He can feel himself shutting down, emotions locked away in a body that won't respond. Jet makes a pained grunting noise and pulls Mathew away, and Peter feel strong arms pull him into Jet's chest, a comforting embrace he's felt many times before since he left the Bunker, a familiar heat that had saved him, comforted him, and soothed him to sleep in these past months Peter had spent with him. Jet speaks into his ear in a low rumble of broken words.
"It's okay, Peter, you have us now. You're our brother and we'll never leave you alone, I promise."
Okay? Of course it wasn't okay, it would never be okay again. Peter's family, his everything, was gone, and he'd never see them again. He'd never hold his Papa's large hand, never feel his Mama's tight hug, or hear his uncles bickering or his cousin griping, he'd never spend those winter together telling stories inside to ward off the cold again, he'd never be able to go back to his home and fling open the door and see his kind and loving parents opening their arms to him, he'd never see his dog come running to greet him again.
The world may have continued, even after it ended, but since the beginning Peter has been frozen in time, and nothing will ever be okay again.
But somehow, even though Peter knows this, he still feels better in Jet's embrace, like his arms are the only thing holding Peter together, and if he ever lets go Peter will fall apart and shatter into a million pieces.