My heels dug into the dry and cracked mud below, the shiny black leather becoming duller by the moment as I watched the wooden coffin sink into the large rectangular hole in the ground.
I hated funerals, and if I didn't feel obliged to pay my respects to the people who put aside their fear to help me defeat the darkest wizard of our lifetime, then I wouldn't be here.
A hand laid itself on my shoulder and I turned around to see the boy's mother weeping. She had a small, grateful smile on her face and my haunting green eyes softened towards her.
She hadn't just lost one son, but two. Fred Weasley had been buried earlier on in the week, and I went to his funeral too.
It was a little happier than this one, but I suppose that's because Fred was always a humorous person, who looked for happiness in everything.
Previously, I didn't have the time to look for happiness in life, but as Mrs Weasley brought me in for a hug and I gave her my condolences once again, I wondered if finding happiness was possible for me now.
"Will you be staying for the reception, dear? Some of Ron's school friends will be there, and I'm sure they'll be happy to see you." Mrs Weasley asked shortly after I broke the hug.
"Thank you for the invitation, Mrs Weasley, but I've had a long day and would like nothing more than to return to my household to grief in private."
I give the short, plump woman a tight smile, but it does nothing to deter the look of worry on her face.
"If you're sure, my dear…"
"I am." I answered quickly, fearful that if I remained in this woman's presence any longer, I would never get away.
"I hope the rest of the day treats you and your family well, ma'am."
"Thank you, Harriet." Mrs Weasley's look of worry is replaced by another tearful smile and I bow my head at her in acknowledgement before taking a step back and apparating back home.
The first thing I do is order Kreature to block the floo and demand that I don't be disturbed as I enter Number 12 Grimmauld Place. Sirius had given me the establishment in his will, and I had accepted his gift without hesitation. Living in a dark house full of horrible artifacts was better than returning to Number 4 Privet Drive any day.
My heels noisily clash against the wooden stairs as I make my way to what was once my Godfather's bedroom. It was the only place in the entire house, besides the kitchen diner, that didn't look like a villain had thrown up on it.
I gently twist the knob to Sirius' bedroom and slowly enter the room that was decorated with dark oak furniture and maroon wallpaper. Closing the door behind me, I stride over the window and quickly shut the long, dark curtains in order to block out the minimal light which illuminated the room.
I kicked my shoes off shortly after, not caring which direction they went, and slowly climbed onto the bed. My shaking fingers grab the white, goose-feather pillow and I hug it to my chest as I shuffle up the bed and lean against the wooden headboard.
I sit there, tears quickly swallowing up my sight before whooshing down my cheeks like a waterfall.
It seems that this is all I do now.
Wake up, get dressed into the darkest of outfits I own, have breakfast and then leave for another funeral or two, only to come home and drown in my own tears.
The reason is simple, to be honest.
I was lonely and hurt.
Lonely, because everyone I loved was dead and unlike most students at Hogwarts, I did not have anyone's shoulder to cry on. Hurt, because I was pretty sure my aching, cracked heart that had been mended during my first year at Hogwarts, threatened to return to it's previous state during the six years that followed.
Despite fighting beside Hermione Granger and Ronald Weasley during the Battle of Hogwarts, and spending all those countless nights on the run with them as they wished to help destroy Voldemort for their own reasons, they were not my friends.
But, I deeply wished they had been.
We were friends during my first year at Hogwarts, but things quickly changed after I accidentally murdered Professor Quirrell.
Hermione had written to me during our first night of the summer holidays, telling me that she didn't want to be friends with me anymore because she did not want her parents to remove her from Hogwarts if they found out the chaos I kept bringing her into. It was either learn magic and act as if I don't exist, or continue to be my friend and potentially lose her education and life, thanks to the threat of Voldemort hanging over my head.
I was kind enough to understand and wished her next six years of Hogwarts to be happy and peaceful, because if I was in her shoes, I would not want to risk losing my education because of the trouble that kept finding me, and so I was left with only Ronald Weasley by my side as I continued my journey of learning magic.
It didn't last.
Three years later, I had been entered into a deadly tournament without a choice and the boy's jealousy reared its ugly head.
I spent my fourth year at Hogwarts alone, with only Neville Longbottom and the Weasley Twins for company every now and then.
It was after losing Ron, the boy who I had slowly begun looking at as more than my best friend, that I decided to forget the hunger of developing friendships and dive back into my old lifestyle of being alone.
The teachers noticed of course, but nothing they could say would change my mind. Hermione and Ron never changed theirs, and I truly did not wish to lose anyone else. Not to fear, jealousy or at the hands of Voldemort.
Harriet Potter had nobody, because they either turned against her, left in fear for their lives, or lost theirs as they fought against the man who wanted to kill her before she was even born.
"I just want to be happy…" I mumble, leaning my chin against the pillow and occasionally wiping the tears that streaked down my pale face.
Hunger panged at my stomach, but I did not wish for Kreature to ask questions about my emotional state, so I slowly left the comfort of the bed and tiptoed out of the room, in search of the bathroom to clean myself up and look more presentable.
"Is the meal to Mistress Harriet's liking?" Kreature's gravelly voice asked as I was about to shove another forkful of mashed potatoes into my mouth.
"Yes. Thank you, Kreature."
"Humph." Kreature frowned before he clicked his fingers and a broom began sweeping itself against the floor of the kitchen diner.
With a sigh, I continued eating and the gears in my head began to turn.
I wanted to be happy. Voldemort was dead, as well as most of his followers. My family was also dead, except for Uncle Remus who had gone missing before I was even on the run in order to search for Voldemort's Horcruxes.
It frustrated me to not know of Remus' whereabouts or overall condition. He could be dead and I would never know, because he never told anyone where he was going and the chances of finding him were slim.
The world was a big place, after all.
"Does Mistress want another glass of cold beverage?"
I eye the goblet of pumpkin juice in front of me before shaking my head.
"No, thank you." Kreature hums and with another snap of his fingers, the broom collapses dead against the tiled floor. The elf slowly drags his feet towards it and picks it up, intending to leave the room to sweep elsewhere.
I stop him before he can leave.
"Kreature, do you even like being here?"
"With a filthy half-blood Mistress? No."
"Then why don't you find work elsewhere? There's plenty of better, more noble pureblood families looking for house elves. Especially now that the war is over and most families have lost their working staff."
Kreature narrows his beady eyes at me.
"Is Mistress trying to get rid of Kreature?"
I bite down on my lower lip. Truthfully, I wasn't but my reaction quickly set the elf into an angered state.
With a smack, the broom Kreature held landed harshly on the flooring.
"Mistress is trying to get rid of Kreature! AFTER ALL OF THE HELP KREATURE GIVES HER!"
With a snarl on his face, Kreature strided toward me and snapped his fingers. The meal in front of me disappeared into thin air and I had only sat down to eat it five minutes ago.
"If Mistress does not want Kreature, then Kreature demands to be set free so he can find another pureblood family."
I cringed and looked up at the ceiling to avoid the angry elf's face.
"Kreature, I asked you because quite honestly, you look miserable being here!" I run a hand through my brunette locks and sigh.
I was also thinking of asking Gringotts to put the town house up for sale, because truly the Wizarding World had nothing left for me.
I wanted to be happy and start mending the cracks in my heart, and perhaps starting fresh is the key to accomplishing that.
Kreature faltered for a moment, as if startled that someone in the family he serves actually gave two ounces of care towards him.
Pulling on his ears, he said in a frustrated tone, "Mistress Harriet does not want Kreature. Kreature wishes to be set free."
"Mistress Harriet wishes to leave the Wizarding World, that's why she asked Kreature if he'd like to work elsewhere."
The elf stares at me with his huge, golf-ball like eyes and I sigh tiredly before reaching for the black, leather watch that rested on my right wrist. Slowly, I begin to undo the strap and soon the contraption is dangling in front of Kreature's form.
"I, Harriet Potter, release Kreature from his bonds tied to The Most Ancient and Noble House of Black, in hopes that he may find a better family to serve."
Kreature's eyes begin to fill with tears and slowly he takes a hold of my watch, before looking at me one last time and then apparating away for good.
I watch the spot where Kreature last stood before sighing and turning back around on my seat, placing my elbows on the table and resting my face in my palms.
"That went well," I said sarcastically as I began devising the next steps I wanted to take.
Gringotts first, I think.
And then perhaps a flight overseas with somewhere to stay afterwards.
Of course, I never realised that leaving one magical world would lead me into another, except this one was perhaps much more deadly.
A/N: Thank you for reading the first chapter of Fixing The Cracks. I hope that you enjoyed it and that you're looking forward to the next chapter! Don't worry, our favourite vegetarian vampires will be making an appearance soon, and please, feel free to add this book to your library if you want to be notified of when chapter two is posted! Well, until next time! :)