Chapter 10

On that night, nothing happened, and I didn't know how I felt about it. My every thought had been consumed with the thought of what she and that boy were doing all alone together. I wanted him to mess up quickly. To do something to make her never want to see him again, but Timothy Thorndike was smarter it seemed. For he was the utmost gentleman and when he dropped Constance off later that night, she was smiling. I knew it was not just because she was a pretty girl and that the boy had manners as every rich young man seemed to. I didn't think that had anything to do with it in comparison to the fact that she was Don Falcones's daughter.

"One false move, I kill him" I thought as I watched them from a distance away throughout the night, never once witnessing anything untoward as the boy simply picked her up, showed her a good time, and returned her before curfew.

"Good morning, Victor" exclaimed Constance the next morning when she got into the car, she was happy, but not giddy as I had expected.

I pretended not to look at her as I drove away from her house. She was acting as if this were any other day, and she hadn't been with that boy only the night before. Yet there was a slump to her shoulders that transcended down to the length of her body. It made the skirt she wore ride up around her thighs. I pretended not to notice that too as neither of us said a word.

"How did things go last night?" I whispered, turning my head to find her already looking at me.

There was a dullness to her eyes, I had expected to see excitement, but it appeared that her new boyfriend hadn't given her the thrill she'd wanted.

"Why do you care? You hate Timmy" whispered Constance there was a crack in her voice midsentence that instantly put me on alert.

I didn't think I would have to deal with the Thorndike boy quite this soon, but even thinking that the image of all the way I would torture him began to play in my mind. I had never been willing to do anything for anyone without reason, but now, for her there didn't need to be any reason at all. She was the reason, but I quickly forgot that as she continued to stare at me still waiting for an answer.

"Just curious to see if you had to use any of those things, I gave you…or if I'll have to track the kid down on your father's orders. If that boy was anything less then a gentleman, your father will find out, and he will have something done about it" I said it slowly, speaking each word as precisely as I could until looking back at her, I saw her eyes were centered on me.

After a moment, she flashed that smile I'd come to associate with her, and then she wasn't looking at me anymore.

"It went fine, you don't have to worry" whispered Constance, she was looking out the window now as everything went by.

She had never been this silent before. It was almost unnerving as we drove. I kept wanting to break the silence, but before I could, she did.

"Victor?" said Constance, her eyes still out the window.

"People treat me differently, you know, even my mother. You're the only one who treats me just like anyone else…it's because of my father isn't it. They treat me different for fear of what my father might do?" said Constance, she was strangely calm as she spoke, so much so that it was almost startling.

I found myself looking at her, but she didn't look back. Her eyes were fixed out the window at something in the distance, I couldn't even see the reflection of her eyes in the glass of the passenger side window. There was a sadness to her, it was a tone I knew well that of the outcast, and yet I'd never expected to hear it on her. In that moment, I pulled the car over to the side of the road, and once again that silence reigned .

"Did something happen?" I whispered for a moment, I almost revealed that I'd been watching over her the whole time, but I held it back.

"Nothing, absolutely nothing. Timmy was a perfect gentleman, but it was strange though. He seemed almost on guard…he acted just like everyone else…it felt like he wasn't genuine, but like it was all an act. I'm just so sick of it, Victor, everybody treats me like Don Falcones's daughter, but not just like me. No one is real with me…except for you…I just thought Timmy would be different" exclaimed Constance finally her eyes were looking into mine.

She looked tired, exhausted with whatever weight was lying on her shoulders. I knew what she meant more then she knew, but I couldn't tell her that. The truth was she was the only one who treated me just like anyone else too.

I had seen firsthand the fear Don Falcone could instill; I knew that many were aware of it especially when it came to his daughter. As much as I had hated the assignment when it first began, I had understood it. The Don did love his daughter and in entrusting her to me, he was ensuring that no harm ever came to her. And yet, I hadn't expected the Thorndike boy to alienate her this way. She wanted someone to want her for her, not because of who her father was, and I hated to tell her that that was something she would have to be on guard against for the rest of her life.

"Why couldn't he treat me like you do? Like I'm just any other girl. You treat me like you would anyone else, if I do something stupid, I know you'll punish me just like anyone else would regardless of who my father is. Why can't everybody be that way?" exclaimed Constance, I knew my answer would break her heart.

Because the truth was that it just couldn't be that way. If it was then who knows what would happen to her, especially in a city like Gotham. It was good that people were scared and in time, I hoped she would come to appreciate that.

"Your father is the most powerful man in this city. He controls the crime in this city, and you are apart of that whether you like it or not. You need to get used to that because you have more power associated with that than you realize. On your word, your father would kill whoever even dared to insult you, you wouldn't even have to give him a reason. You need to accept that, little girl, it's something that you were born with, and that isn't going away" I said my words tender in a way I'd never allowed with anyone else.

I expected it all to upset her, but she didn't complain. She remained silent.

"I never thought of it that way…or even considered the part I could play" whispered Constance, she was leaning closer to me now.

"Victor, you'll always treat me just like this, won't you?" whispered Constance, there was a need there.

Even with the barrier that had been broken with our friendship, I had never allowed myself to get too close to her. Yet, in that moment, I found myself taking her hand. It looked so much smaller in my own and our eyes met as I considered how I was going to answer her. She needed me to be the one person in the world that would always treat her like a real person, and I was more than willing to be that person.

"Little girl, I'll always treat you just the same because unlike everyone else, your father can't hurt me" I whispered, I kissed her hand for reasons I didn't quite understand.

"I don't think anyone stands a chance a against you, Victor" whispered Constance as she leaned back in her seat with an air of calm washing over her now.

Some kind of pact had formed between the two of us, I didn't completely understand it as I started to drive again. I knew what I said was the truth, that I would never treat her the way everyone else did.

I couldn't treat her that way, maybe because she had come to mean so much to me. I knew I was in love with her and as her relationship with the Thorndike boy got more serious, I still couldn't take my eyes off her. It wasn't just that, it was my job anymore. She was important to me. Yet, as time passed, as I watched her with that boy night after night, I felt something in me begin to fray. Because he would never be able to protect her the way I did. He would never be able to keep this city from tearing her apart. She needed me, but not in the same way I needed her. I hated having to watch her with him, having to watch her kiss him, and I could already see that I would have to watch him do other things too.

"She's just a little girl…but more then that, she's mine. My girl" I thought as I watched her with this boy who barely knew what to do with her, picturing myself with her, even as I knew it could never be that way.

I had never allowed myself to become emotionally involved. I didn't do relationships. The most I allowed myself was a quick fuck under an assumed name, but I wouldn't even allow myself that with her. She was off limits. She was worth so much more than that, and that was what made her a weakness. My weakness. And yet, she was also a gift. With her I knew I was human. I had never felt anything for anyone until she came along. I had been a robot of sorts until she came along to prove I wasn't.

She made me feel more like a man, less like a monster, and I didn't know how I felt about that as I watched her day after day. All these years, I had been doing my job without ever allowing myself to feel. I was a monster, I was aware of what this city thought of me, but Constance had made me see the truth. That I wasn't a robot or a monster, but a man. A man made of flesh and bone and every emotion that I'd kept tramped down all these years, she had brought to the surface with one look. And yet I still wasn't good enough for her. I wasn't what she deserved. Nobody would ever measure up. That Thorndike boy, any boy or man that came looking for her affections, they wouldn't be good enough for her, but as we drove in silence, part of me wondered if I could become worthy enough. If I could become the man, she deserved. I shook that thought away though, she would never see me that way, and I would never been quite good enough no matter what I did. I had to realize that, to acknowledge it, and be content just being like this with her. This was better than nothing at all. I kept telling myself that, but part of me just couldn't believe it as we drove in silence. It was the longest silence we'd ever had between us. I didn't see this longing for her going away. I didn't know if I wanted it to. What if I did something to hurt her or show her my feelings without meaning to? What if I lost control? I couldn't let it happen, I couldn't lose control with her, and I knew that now my self-control must be better than it had ever been before.

She deserved a white knight and that just wasn't me, so that's why I decided to just watch her from afar.