Softpurr watched her kits play with a careful eye. It was nightfall, and she didn't want to lose sight of them as they tumbled around the nursery. They were getting big; the nursery was already cramped with four litters and another on the way, and her kittens were nearly as large as apprentices now. If they didn't receive their mentors soon, Softpurr worried there wouldn't be enough space for Sunblossom's kits whenever they arrived.
"Hey! Get off!" squealed Olivekit, who was being smothered by Willowkit, one of Leafcloud's litter. Leafcloud and Softpurr had had their kittens at around the same time, so they were rather close, but Softpurr worried greatly about her queen friend. According to the warrior code, deputies weren't supposed to have kits, and Leafcloud was defying that by bearing Rippletide's kits. Featherstar had reassured Leafcloud it didn't matter, but Softpurr still felt unsettled. Going against the wishes of StarClan would only bring ruin.
"No way!" Willowkit responded, pressing her ginger-and-white paws down on Olivekit's back to keep him from escaping.
Softpurr smiled as she watched Olivekit kick at Willowkit's underbelly (with claws sheathed, as she had taught him to do when play-fighting) and free himself from her grasp. Her son would make a fine warrior.
She turned to look at Lowkit, who was asleep by her side. Her pelt was beautiful- mostly white, or at least pale cream, with points of tabby coloring like Swankit had. Softpurr herself had a pointed pelt, and she was oddly proud to see her coloring passed down to her kittens. It was a mother's pride. Every single one of her kits was beautiful, from the pointed pelts of Lowkit and Swankit to Littlekit's ginger-and-white like his father, and Olivekit's unusual dark tabby with patches of lighter fur. She was still perplexed on how his coloring existed, but it was probably from some point in Softpurr's lineage. Her mother had apparently been a kittypet, though she had never met her. She had died during kitting. Softpurr felt lucky to be alive, to see her kits and watch them grow.
She was shaken away from her rambling thoughts as Swankit jumped in front of her, her tail lashing excitedly. "Are we going to get prey soon?" she mewed.
The queen smiled. "Of course. Your father said he would bring back as much prey as he could to feed us.
"Yeah, but when is he bringing it?" Swankit insisted, growing impatient. "I can't wait to eat! It's been… I dunno, a day?"
"Just quiet down and wait for him, Swankit," Softpurr meowed soothingly, licking her kit's forehead. She tried to squirm away, and Softpurr laughed. Kits would be kits sometimes.
"Fine, I'll wait. I guess," the little she-kit agreed with an angry huff. She sat down neatly, curling her tail around her legs, and stared at the ground for a few moments before looking back up. "How long is it going to take him?"
Softpurr laughed at Swankit's impatience. She was always eager to know everything right at that moment. "Only StarClan knows, dear. You'll just have to find out."
Swankit sighed and settled down, her eyes flitting around the dark nursery. The playing kittens had calmed down now, and most of them returned to their mothers with wide yawns. Breezekit and Littlekit still scuffled in the center of the den, the small open space between the queens and their nests where the brush had been trampled down over generations of pawsteps.
Breezekit was fighting well, her age and size giving her an advantage over Littlekit, but Softpurr's son refused to back down. The she-kit had pinned him to the ground with her mottled tortoiseshell paws, pressing her weight onto him. Littlekit writhed and wriggled, moving with such wild energy that Breezekit was knocked backwards just enough for him to slither out of her grasp, jumping to his feet a mouse-length away from his opponent.
The fur on the back of Littlekit's neck bristled, his back arched. "Ha! I beat you!" he mewed triumphantly, turning to look at his mother. "Did you see, mom? I did it!"
Softpurr slowly got to her paws and took a step closer to her son, noting that she didn't even need to cross much ground before she reached him. "Yes, Littlekit, you did very well," she congratulated him, flicking his side with her tail in a show of affection. She caught sight of Breezekit a pawstep away, scowling at her paws, which she had wrapped her fluffy tail around. "Now, what do you say, Littlekit?" Softpurr quizzed her son, indicating towards Breezekit with a nod of her head.
Littlekit looked embarrassed, casting his gaze to the side. "Good fight, Breezekit," he mumbled. Softpurr almost laughed at his reluctance to say the words; he could sometimes be a bit too proud for his own good, which was a bit odd for a kit. Then again, he would be an apprentice soon.
Breezekit looked up from the ground and shot Littlekit a determined look. "I'll win next time for sure!"
The ginger tomkit looked back at her and growled. "We'll have to see about that!"
Softpurr laughed awkwardly and herded her kit away, meowing goodnight to Willowsneeze and her kittens as she brought Littlekit back to the nest she and her kittens rested in. Lowkit was attempting to rest there, her fluffy face buried in her paws, but Swankit kept her awake. The little she-kit bounced on her paws, asking a thousand questions at once, barely pausing to breathe. Softpurr quickened her pace and walked over to her daughter, nudging her with her muzzle.
"Swankit, try to let Lowkit rest, alright?" Softpurr meowed, silencing the little she-kit for a moment.
"I just wanted to know if she knew if-"
Lowkit moaned and rolled over, pressing her paws against her ears. "For StarClan's sake, can you be quiet for one moment? I'm trying to sleep!"
Swankit looked startled for an instant before she leapt to her paws, her fur standing on end. "Well, I'm sorry, I didn't know you were immune to hunger! Apparently I can never ask any cat if they know when we'll be getting fresh-kill."
Softpurr hurried over to her two daughters, who were now glaring at each other and hissing. The queen pushed herself between the she-kits and swiftly groomed them both in turn. "Now, now, girls. Settle down," she said calmly, sensing a fight about to break. "Everyone is hungry and tired, I know, but your father simply isn't back yet. There's nothing I can do about that."
Swankit sighed, her fur flattening. "I know. I just wish we had something to eat."
Softpurr felt herself relax now that her kittens had calmed down. She let out a long breath and it was a while before she spoke again. "Don't you worry, my kits. Tallflame will be here soon enough."
"I wish there was some way he could be here now, though," Lowkit piped up, her voice scratchy with exhaustion and weakness.
Olivekit shrugged. "Father will be here soon enough. He's always on time," In response, his siblings all cast him a doubtful glance that made Softpurr's fur crawl. He was right; Tallflame was always punctual. What was taking him so long?
"I know!" Littlekit yowled suddenly, jumping to his paws. "I can go check on him!"
"No, honey, you can't-" Softpurr began, startled.
"That's a great idea!" Swankit agreed, jumping to her paws. She was always over eager to take Aww, but mom…" Swankit whined, her wide green eyes sparkling as she tried to beg her way out of the rule her mother had laid down.on a task. "We can go find him! Maybe he's in DawnClan territory right now, all lost and alone…"
"No!" Softpurr growled, her normally calm demeanor breaking for a moment. "Kits aren't allowed out of camp. You would get hurt!"
"Aww, but mom…" Swankit whined, her wide green eyes sparkling as she tried to beg her way out of the rule her mother had laid down.
"I'm sorry, Swankit, but you're not allowed," Softpurr stated, her voice firm. She couldn't stand the thought of her kits being caught by some badger or fox as they went to look for their father. No, they were much safer in the nursery.
She sat uncomfortably as all four of her kits stared at her with desperation.
Softpurr sighed. "You can ask around camp, but don't you dare leave it."
Her kittens scrambled to their paws and left the nursery in a rush, leaving Softpurr alone with the rest of the nursery.
She watched in silence as the other four queens settled into their nests with their kits, or, in Sunblossom's case, attempted to get comfortable on her own in a large, empty moss nest. The queen's belly was swollen with kits, and Softpurr remembered her days as an expecting queen. Tallflame had visited her between his warrior duties, bringing fresh-kill and some exciting story about an event that had taken place on patrol or a daring excursion onto DawnClan's land. She wondered with a wistful sigh if she would ever return to those halcyon days, or if she'd return to her warrior duties. It had been so long since she'd even looked at a living mouse that she wasn't sure if she could hunt anymore. Softpurr figured it might be good for her to get some exercise from time to time.
Even still, the thought of leaving the nursery hurt more than anything. She couldn't imagine sleeping in a den that wasn't full of bumbling kits and nursing she-cats, surrounded by the warm aura of family. No, she didn't think she could ever abandon her life inside the bush that served as the nursery. It was home to her more than any other place was.
A rustle in the leaves behind her caught Softpurr's attention. Her heart soared for an instant before dropping. It wasn't Tallflame. The visitor was an ancient silver she-cat. Featherstar.
Featherstar gave Softpurr a respectful nod before padding over to where Willowsneeze sat with her kittens. The two she-cats shared words in a terse whisper. Softpurr swiveled her ears in an attempt to hear, but she couldn't make out what they were saying. She figured it didn't really matter, anyway; it was obvious what the cats were talking about. Willowsneeze's kits were over seven moons old at this point and overdue for mentors. The pointed queen smiled at the thought of an extra nest space once Flamekit and Willowkit were apprenticed, and wondered who their mentors would be. She also couldn't help but ask herself why Featherstar had waited so long to apprentice the kits, though clearly her decision to do so now had something to do with DawnClan's capture. At least, it seemed likely.
To her surprise, the old she-cat walked over to Softpurr's nest and sat beside the queen, her tail lashing.
"Softpurr," Featherstar rasped. "May I speak with you?"
"O-of course!" Softpurr stammered, suddenly giddy with excitement. Was Featherstar planning on apprenticing her kits, too? The thought made her heart race. Her kittens, all groomed and beaming, touching noses with the warriors that would teach them to bring honor to their Clan and family. It was her life's ambition, finally coming true.
"Would you say any of your kittens are different from the rest?" Featherstar asked cryptically.
Softpurr gave her a confused look, and she felt her hopes crash to the ground. What was this about? "I don't understand what you're asking."
"Do any of them, say, act differently? Not quite as ferocious, maybe?" her leader meowed, which didn't help at all.
Softpurr shrugged. "Well, I suppose. Lowkit's rather calm and reserved compared to her siblings. She rarely ever takes part in play-fighting. But I don't understand what that has to do with anything."
Featherstar smiled, her eyes closed and her tail curled around her paws. She seemed to let out a great sigh of relief. "Perfect. Lowkit, then."
Softpurr felt panic and bewilderment rise in her as Featherstar began to stand up. "Wait! Lowkit for what? What's going on?"
The old she-cat looked back at her and grimaced. "Oh, I didn't realize. I should have explained first," Featherstar took a step closer to Softpurr, who was curled up in her nest. "When you reach my age, sometimes details can slip your mind."
Softpurr had to bite back a response. It wasn't that she mistrusted her leader, but it was as Featherstar said. The she-cat was much too old to be a warrior, let alone lead an entire Clan. She should have retired long ago, like the elders of DuskClan had. Even Cloudeye, who wasn't much older than Softpurr, had decided to retire when she began to go blind. Featherstar's pride had kept her in service.
"I'm planning on making Lowkit a medicine cat apprentice," Featherstar explained. Her face turned pensive. "And perhaps Flamekit, too. He has a bit of an aptitude for herbs."
The queen felt her excitement return. Lowkit, a medicine cat apprentice! It was definitely an honorable calling, and though it might prove difficult, she had faith in her daughter that she would pull through and make a wonderful medicine cat. "I think it's a lovely idea," Softpurr meowed with a smile and a nod. "But you should really ask her first. I don't know if she'd be open to it. And I'm assuming you've asked Mothripple already? Lowkit can be a bit of trouble to deal with, and I don't know if-"
"Don't worry so, Softpurr," Featherstar said calmly, her voice hoarse and thin, another sign of her rapidly progressing elderhood. "I have everything sorted out. Mothripple can ask Lowkit herself, if she'd like."
Softpurr nodded, her nerves calming at the words. There was no need to worry.
She didn't believe herself.
"Good night," her leader said with a curt nod, and left the nursery.
The pointed queen was left alone to stew in her nervous, rambling thoughts. Of course, she wished the best for her daughter, but what if that was unachievable? What if something went wrong?
She felt a sudden urge to take a walk and calm herself down.
Softpurr poked her head out of the leaves of the nursery and immediately felt the chill of the night air. It cleared her mind, and she padded happily through camp, listening to the chirp of crickets and the quiet rustles of her Clan settling into their nests.
Her serene feeling was interrupted as a force slammed into her legs, taking them out from under her. She landed on the ground in a heap, a squirming cat pinned underneath her. Softpurr scrambled backward and was met with the face of Littlekit, squinting in pain.
"Oh, sorry, mom," he mewed. "I didn't see you there."
Softpurr chuckled. "It's fine, don't worry. But remember in the future to watch where you're going."
Littlekit nodded enthusiastically and prepared to run away again. Softpurr stopped him.
"Where are you off to?" she asked. "And where are your siblings?"
"Well, we were looking around camp, and it turns out that dad was on a patrol with another warrior to go hunting into DawnClan's territory. Rippletide told us as he was leaving. So we're trying to find someone to go look for him. Olivekit went in the apprentices' den, and-"
"Oh, no," Softpurr meowed, flicking her son's pelt with her tail. "Don't you all go waking sleeping cats! One of you is going to get your face clawed off!" Softpurr pointed toward the rest of camp with her muzzle. "You'd better go stop them before-"
"Softpurr!" came a muffled cry from behind her. The queen whirled around to see her mate running through the entrance to camp, his mouth stuffed with fresh-kill. Softpurr ran up to meet him and buried her nose in his long ginger fur, pulling back to stare into his face.
"What took you so long?" she teased him, and she saw a glimmer of laughter in his bright green eyes.
Tallflame took a moment to place the pile of prey on the ground and to meow a greeting to Littlekit, who had run over to his father with his tiny legs. "Oh, nothing," he told her unconvincingly, shooting Softpurr a meaningful glance and gesturing toward Littlekit with his tail.
She understood. Softpurr turned to her son with a smile. "Littlekit, why don't you go round up all of your siblings so they can see their father? Then we can all eat, too."
Littlekit nodded, his eyes determined. "Okay!" he exclaimed, and scrambled over the dusty ground to find the rest of his litter.
Softpurr turned to her mate with a concerned look. "So what kept you so long?"
Tallflame shook his head and sighed. "I was told to destroy DawnClan's camp. Break up the dens, cover it with debris. In case they wanted to head back."
She felt a jolt of shock. Destroying a camp? That was the work of angry rogues, feral animals that held no regard for cat lives. Not something that Clans were meant to do.
Tallflame must have noticed her expression, because he curled his tail around her. "Believe me, I didn't want to do it. It felt terrible. So… wrong. I tore down generations of work with my claws. It felt like a crime," he confessed, his tone troubled. "But Featherstar ordered me to do it, and I had no choice. I couldn't betray my Clan."
Softpurr nodded slowly. "I understand, Tallflame. I just wish…"
"I know," he meowed, pressing his pelt against hers. "I don't know what StarClan thinks of it either."
His words struck a note in her heart that she hadn't expected to resonate so loudly. Loyalty was one thing, but weren't the Clans meant to follow the ways of StarClan? She doubted that their ancestors wished to see lands ransacked and torn to bits over a rivalry. But, she thought, trying to justify her Clan's actions. StarClan wouldn't want DuskClan to starve, either. And this is the only way to prevent it.
But as Softpurr walked back into the nursery, soon joined by her kits as they came to greet their father and dig into the pile of prey he had brought back, she worried that it wasn't true. That there was some other way that her Clan could survive without destroying DawnClan.
She shook her head angrily, trying to dispel her worries. DawnClan is the one destroying us, Softpurr thought. Their leader refused to give us what we needed, so we had to take it. Is that so wrong?
It was, and that was what scared her.