Chapter Five

"I love you, Andy. I really do." Robert saw Andy's face turn into a frown. "I just don't know if I want to keep us a secret anymore."

"Robert. You just promoted me to captain. If we come out now we're going to be suspended, investigated and then one or both of us fired, Robert." Andy started to pace. "I'm not ready to lose you."

"Then what do we do?"

"I don't know. I really don't know. I just know that this shouldn't be so hard." Andy saw Robert about to interrupt. "But, It's worth it, Robert."

"I don't think I could keep us a secret anymore though, Andy."

Andy looks down, knowing she wouldn't be able to keep them a secret either but if they came out, one or both of them would lose their jobs. Andy brought her head up to look at Robert.

"So this is it?" Andy takes a deep breath, trying to compose herself and then looks up, "We're just over?"

Robert looks at Andy, noticing how torn up she looks. "Andy, I'm sorry. I know we waited a long time to try to work this out but-"

"I get, Robert. It's okay." Andy cut Robert off. "We both knew this wasn't going to last, right?"

"I'm sorry, Andy. I think I should get going before Maya comes back." Robert walked closer to Andy and placed a kiss on her forehead and turned to leave the apartment.

Andy heard the door close and sank down on the couch and put her head in her hands, resting on her knees. Damnit. Damnit. Damnit. "Damnit!"

"Andy?" Andy snapped her head up and turned around. "Are you okay? What's going on?" Andy looked at Maya.

"Well, Robert and I decided to break up. Or I guess stop whatever was going on between us." Andy told her, looking down, and rubbing her hands together. "He just left."

Maya closed the apartment door, quickly brought the bags of groceries into the kitchen and walked over to the couch and knelt in front of Andy.

"Was it a "we" decision or was it-"

Andy cut Maya off. "It was a "we" decision. We tried to think of how we could come out as a couple and stay together but it just always ended with us probably getting fired or suspended." Andy told her. "It may be for the best."

Maya looked Andy in the eye and could see that she was pushing back her emotions. Maya sat down on the couch next to Andy and pulled her into her arms and just held her.

"I'm sorry it didn't work out, Andy," Maya said while rubbing Andy's back.

"It's fine, Maya." Andy pulled out of the hug. "I'm going to go for a run, I'll be back in a couple of hours." Andy doesn't wait for Maya to respond. Instead, she got off the couch and went to her room to get changed and left the apartment.

Once Andy left the building and started running she tried to keep thoughts of Robert in the back of her mind but so far it was failing and she thought back to the day she showed up at his doorstep.

"I don't wanna fight anymore. I don't wanna fight my dad. I don't wanna fight you. I am so tired, and sad and sick of being angry. And I, I just want to feel and to be in a safe place and I don't know why or how, and I, I can't explain it, but you're the safest place I have, and everything would be okay for the first time in a really long time if you would just start kissing me now, so.."

Andy remembered that day. The truck, the motorcyclists, the probie having to tube an already dead patient, how she went to have a drink with Jack, Travis and the probie after shift and how after her second beer she left the bar and ran to his place. Waking up in his arms the next morning was a new feeling for her. She had never felt so safe and she never wanted that feeling to end.

Andy had been running for an hour straight, memories running through her mind when she felt something collide with her and she got knocked down to the ground. Ow. What the fuck. Andy was thinking when someone started talking to her.

"Oh, my god. I am so sorry. I didn't see you. Here, let me help you up." the person offered and Andy lifted one of her arms, accepting the help since she was too sore to pull herself back up. "Are you okay?" Andy looked up at the person who helped her up.

"Oh, my god, Michelle." Andy's jaw dropped.

"Holy crap. Andy?"

"No freakin' way." Andy couldn't get anything else out, her mouth just kept gaping open and close and she saw that Michelle wasn't fairing much better.

"Andy, it's been so long," Was all Michelle could get out.

"Nearly two decades long, Michelle." Andy took a breath, still winded from the run. "What are you doing here?"

"I should be asking you that. This isn't exactly your kind of scene." Michelle bit back.

Andy took a look around to see where she was and she was surprised to see that she ran from 10th Avenue and Newland to somewhere in Capital Hill. shit.

"Oh, god." Andy let out. "Um, do you live near here?"

"Five minutes away actually. Think you can make it?"

"Haha. Yeah, I'm good. Just don't make a race out of it," Andy joked. Michelle chuckled.

"Deal."

Andy and Michelle continued the short walk to Michelle's house and when they came to it, Andy stopped short while Michelle went to unlock the door.

"You okay, Andy?" Michelle asked once she realized her cousin wasn't behind her.

Andy didn't hear her because she was zoned out. Thinking about how crazy this was. That she was thinking about her extended family and how she just literally ran into one.

"Andy? Andy, are you ok?" Michelle had come closer to her, trying to wave her out of her haze.

"Uh. I- I'm just tired. I didn't realize it but I was running for over an hour." Andy lets out a nervous chuckle. "I was kinda hoping to get out of my head when I was running but I guess I left my brain at home." Andy tried to joke.

Michelle looked a little worried. "Well, you are allowed to come in, Andy. I know it's been a while but I don't bite."

Andy smiled and walked into the house. Andy looked around and she was taken back to her childhood. All the photos hung around the house, the photos that were on the tables as well she couldn't help but think back to how it looked so much like her house before her mother had passed.

"Michelle," Andy called her attention. "Does anyone else live here?"

"Since my mom died in a fire and dad, well, a couple of years ago I lost him too so ya, I live here alone. Why do you ask?" Michelle was looking at her questioningly.

"Just curious is all. I'm sorry about your dad and your-" Andy paused. "Oh shit."

"Andy? Seriously, what's up? Are you okay?" Michelle moved over to her cousin. "What's going on?"

"I'm sorry if this is kind of blunt or upsets you, but when did your mother die?" Andy asked.

Michelle's expression changed. "She um. It was around the last time we saw you. The fire happened 5 days after the last family barbecue." Michelle watches Andy's face and when she sees that it's turned into a frown. "Your mother, your mother was also in it. Why does this seem like recent news to you?"

Andy sighs and shakes her head and looks at Michelle with an unreadable expression. "Because it is recent news." Andy ran a hand through her hair. "Why would my dad lie to me?"

I'm so sorry if you wanted Andy and Robert together as a couple in this story but I think I may want to go another direction.