Bob felt his knees go weak. He had to grab onto the doctor's desk to keep from collapsing to the floor. His heart was racing, and he felt as if he was going to be sick. This was not happening. This could not be happening. There was no way Louise could possibly have ovarian cancer. His baby could not be facing the same cancer that had taken his mother from him. It was impossible. There was no way. Linda was a blubbering mess beside him. Taking several deep breaths, he ran his hands through his hair and sat back in his chair.
"Are you saying Louise may have ovarian cancer? That is impossible. She is nine. That has to be impossible." Bob rambled.
"The good news is that ovarian tumors are rarely cancerous in girls Louise's age and when they are there is an extremely high cure rate." Dr. Johanson assured.
"Then why did you want the biopsy immediately?" Bob questioned.
"Due to the size of the mass. We want to remove it as soon as possible. Our plan is to remove the entire mass for biopsy." Dr. Johanson replied.
"I just don't get it. I asked our pediatrician about the genetic testing. Wh…when I realized that my mom's cancer could have been genetic. I knew about the tests. He said that kids did not get ovarian or breast cancer. That putting Tina and Louise or even our son Gene through testing would be cruel and unnecessary. That I should talk to the kids and let them make the decision to get tested when they are older. Because it was not going to happen to them until they were adults anyway. How could he be so wrong? How could I be so foolish?" Bob rambled.
"It is rare in children. Your pediatrician has likely never encountered a case. Honestly, I am still processing it myself." Dr. Johanson replied.
"But it could just be a cyst. My sister Gayle gets ovarian cysts. She was just a little older than Louise when she got her first one. So it could be that." Linda added.
"Exactly and even if it is a tumor most of the time, they are benign in pediatric patients and even actual cancers tend to be less severe in children as well. The only thing is that while in most cases doctors are able to preserve fertility. Due to the size of the mass. Our surgeon wants to remove her entire ovary. Now unless additional extreme actions have to be taken. She should still be able to conceive. Though she will likely need fertility support." Dr. Johanson explained.
"I don't think Louise even wants kids." Bob commented.
"I would still talk openly with her and make sure she understands. Just in case she does change her mind one day." Dr. Johanson replied.
Louise leaned back on the hospital bed. She wondered what the hell was going on and why she could not leave. They had run all the tests they needed to run. If everything was done, why couldn't she just go home. She wished she had Kuchi Kopi or at least one of her books. Something to do to pass the time.
"Hi Louise!" A familiar voice called from the hallway.
"Rudy? What are you doing in a dump like this on a lovely Saturday evening?" Louise questioned.
"I rescued a baby shark from a swarm of star struck toddlers. Just kidding I had an asthma attack." Rudy laughed.
"Are you OK now?" Louise asked.
"Good as new." Rudy assured.
"That's good to hear." Louise replied.
"So why are you here on a Saturday?" Rudy questioned.
"I decided that I want to be a stunt double when I grow up. So, I let Gene break a chair on my back." Louise lied.
"Ouch" Rudy winced.
"Actually, we got into a car accident on the way to my grandpa's house." Louise admitted.
"Oh My God! Are you OK?! Where is the rest of your family?! Are they OK?!" Rudy wheezed.
"Deep breaths Rudy. We are OK for the most part. My dad sprained his wrist, Gene broke his collarbone, and Tina had to get stitches in her face but she's all boring and wouldn't let them give her a cool scar." Louise explained.
"What about your mom?" Rudy asked.
"She's OK, I guess. She wasn't hurt bad, but she's been acting strange." Louise replied.
"So, what happened to you?" Rudy asked.
"I don't know. I mean I didn't get hurt in the accident or anything, but my stomach has been bugging me for a few weeks now. So, they made me get that checked out while we are here. They ran all these tests and will not let me go home." Louise explained.
"Rudy! It's time to go!" Sylvester called.
"Well, I've got to go but I really hope you are OK and that your family feels better soon." Rudy replied.
"Thanks, and I hope you feel better too." Louise replied.
"I already feel way better. I just came in as a precaution." Rudy explained.
"Hey Rudy, we really need to get going. Are you OK? Oh, I am sorry I didn't realize your friend was here. Hi Louise." Sylvester called.
"Hi Mr. Stieblitz." Louise replied.
"Louise got into an accident. Her family is OK mostly, but Louise's stomach has been hurting. So, she has to get extra tests." Rudy explained.
"Oh, I am sorry to hear that, Louise." Sylvester replied.
"Thank you" Louise muttered.
You could cut the tension with a knife on the drive home from the hospital. Bob and Linda were eternally grateful that Pete had offered to drive the family home in his van. Rather than everybody having to pile into Teddy's truck again. Especially knowing how hard the bumps must have been on Louise's stomach. Louise would have her biopsy on Monday morning, meaning thus they knew they had to tell her soon but how did they tell their nine-year-old she might have cancer? How would they break the news to Tina and Gene? Louise acted tough but she was actually very sensitive, and her older siblings had always been fiercely protective of her. How would they handle knowing there was something they could not protect their baby sister from? How would Louise handle something she could not outwit?
"You know it's probably nothing." Linda whispered.
"What's probably nothing?" Tina, who sat between them in Pete's minivan asked.
"Nothing is probably nothing." Linda lied.
"She means that the damage to the car probably isn't that bad." Bob clarified.
"Yeah, it didn't look bad." Tina replied thankfully, going with the lie.
Bob and Linda thanked Pete for the ride before heading up to the apartment. They watched the kids go up the steps. Gene eagerly racing towards the fridge and Louise bounding up the stairs two at a time. Reminding her siblings that she got to control the remote for the night. She had been given something to dull the pain, but Bob could tell she was still hurting. Hurting and yet powering through the pain. She was so much like his mother. It hurt his heart to know she may be facing the same battle. This was supposed to be his way of getting her back. He wasn't supposed to lose her again.
Flashback
Eleven-year-old Bob Belcher parked his bike in the alley behind his dad's diner. The bike had been adjusted as much as it could, and he was still too tall for it since his last growth spurt a couple of months earlier. At least Christmas was just a little over a month away and based on the conversation he had overheard. When his parents thought he was in bed. He knew that a new bike was definitely going to be under the tree. He hoped it was the cherry red Schwinn like the one his cousin Joey had. He chained the bike to the fence post. Briefly considering "accidentally" leaving it unchained. In hopes it would get stolen and the new bike would have to be given early. No that was a terrible idea. His mom would give in no problem, but his dad would probably end up giving the new bike to a kid who could take care of it. He dropped the chain and hung his helmet on the handlebar. He walked to the back door and jiggled the handle. It was locked, that was strange. His dad never closed the diner. Not even when they got that big blizzard last winter. Maybe the health inspector or whatever was around. Apparently leaving the backdoor unlocked was a huge safety thing. He walked around the front, and the lights were all turned off. What on Earth was going on? Was it a surprise party for him? Even though his birthday was not until April 26th? That would be fun. No, it wouldn't. He hated surprise parties. If the restaurant was closed and there was no party. Then where are his parents?
"Bobby?" Harry called walking down the street carrying his mail bag.
"Harry!" Bob cried, but panic was beginning to set in, and he was grateful to find a trusted adult.
"What's wrong, partner?" Harry asked.
"The restaurant is closed! I don't know where my parents are!" Bob cried.
"Nobody told you? Your dad was supposed to call the school, but I guess he forgot or maybe it was after you already left." Harry commented.
"Where are my parents?!" Bob interrupted now fully hysterically.
"Bobby, buddy. I really don't want to be the one to tell you this, but your dad had to take your mom to the hospital." Harry explained.
"The hospital? Why?" Bob demanded.
"You remember how your mom has been feeling bad lately? Today she was in so much pain she could not get up off the bathroom floor. Then she threw up and there was blood. So, your dad rushed her to the hospital." Harry explained.
"What's wrong? Is she going to be, OK?" Bob worried.
"I don't know. Come on, you can come with me on the rest of my route. Maybe there will be news by the time we are done?" Harry offered.
"OK" Bob agreed wiping away tears.
END FLASHBACK
Bob debated whether or not he should open the restaurant on Sunday. Part of him wanted to stay closed and spend the entire day holding Louise in his arms. Part of him wanted to take her to the airport and board the first flight to Japan. Just take Louise on her dream vacation and forget about the biopsy and the fear that cancer bring, but running would do them no good. Running would just mean that Louise's cancer. If it were cancer. He was still praying that it was benign. would go untreated and she would die. He knew he had to face the future. As terrifying as it may be. He also knew that if Louise did have cancer. they could end up having to close for weeks. He knew that they really did need to open. Besides, working would take his mind off what Louise was facing.
"Why does Louise get the day off? I am the one who got hurt worst!" Gene whined.
"Because Louise's stomach is still bothering her." Linda explained.
"We were at the hospital all day yesterday. Why didn't the doctors make her better?" Gene questioned.
"Because sometimes doctors cannot just magically make somebody well." Bob explained, swallowing hard. Wanting to put off breaking the news just a little longer.
Business was steady on Sunday. Definitely busier than normal but still slower than Bob would have liked. Doctor Johanson had recommended a liquid or light diet for Louise for the time being. So, Linda made a Japanese soup that she liked for dinner. Once dinner was over Bob and Linda knew they could not put off the inevitable anymore. Louise had to be back at the hospital first thing in the morning. She deserved to know the truth before then. Despite the pain in her stomach Louise was still being Louise. After washing the dishes and going over how exactly to break the news. They found the kids in Louise's room playing a variation of hide and seek they had made up when they were younger. Where one kid would hide, another would guard, and the third would seek. Tina was searching all over the room for Louise who Bob could see hiding behind the beanbag chair where Gene was sitting.
"Kids!" Linda called from the doorway.
"Tina! You know the rules! No parent involvement unless somebody is in danger!" Louise whined climbing out from behind the beanbag.
"I didn't get mom and dad! Honest!" Tina cried.
"It's true. She didn't. We uh we need to talk to you guys about something." Bob explained.
"Is it about Jimmy Junior?" Tina asked.
"No uh this is serious." Bob replied.
If it's the socks in the restaurant dish washer. I can explain." Gene declared.
"It's not that but you and me are definitely going to circle back to that one later." Bob replied.
"OK it's not about Jimmy Junior or anything gross Gene did. So, what is it and why am I immune from hearing about it?" Louise questioned, praying it was some sort of tween talk for which she was too young.
"Uh the thing is Louise. It is actually about you." Linda replied.
"We have been over this! Mr. Frond is a pathological liar! Anything he says cannot be trusted!" Louise scoffed.
"It's not about school sweetie." Linda corrected.
"OK so what is going on?" Louise asked.
"Well remember how they ran all those tests at the hospital yesterday?" Bob questioned.
"No, I definitely forgot about spending my entire Saturday being poked, prodded and scanned like some a pack of quick sale produce." Louise snarked.
"Well, this is not going to be easy to say but the doctor noticed something on your scans." Bob began.
"Wait Dr. Johanson found something on my X-Ray?" Louise cried she was far from a medical expert, and she did not go gaga over the midweek medical dramas the way the rest of her family did, but she knew that it was never good when a doctor found something on your X-Ray.
"Yes, Louise I am sorry but Dr. Johanson or I guess the X-Ray doctor noticed a mass on your ovary." Bob explained.
"My ovary?!" Louise cried.
"Yeah, it's the tube your eggs come out of. It's your baby tube!" Gene cried.
"I know what an ovary is Gene! What I do not know is why there is a mass on mine!" Louise snapped.
"Wait didn't Grandma Lily die of ovarian cancer?!" Tina cried, beginning to hyperventilate.
"She did and that is why Dr. Johanson is so worried." Linda replied.
"So, you are saying that I have cancer?!" Louise cried.
"Unfortunately, there is a chance that you could, but the good news is that in most cases pediatric ovarian tumors are benign." Bob assured.
"But I could still have cancer?" Louise questioned.
"Yes" Bob replied.
"So, what the hell do I do now?" Louise asked.
"Well first of all first thing tomorrow you will go back to the hospital for a biopsy. As of now the doctors are planning on removing the entire mass and unfortunately that means removing your ovary as well." Bob began.
"But you should still be able to have babies. Though it may be harder than it is for other woman." Linda added.
"I don't want babies!" Louise cried.
"OK" Linda whispered.
"The doctors will also biopsy the lymph nodes near your ovaries." Bob explained.
"So, say that test is positive, and I do have cancer? What do I do then? I mean grandma died of that kind of cancer." Louise questioned trying to hide her tears.
"They will start you on chemo and maybe radiation. You might need more surgery, but we will be right by your side through it all and you will get through it." Bob assured.
"But what if I don't?" Louise whispered playing with the strap on her hat and looking down at the sticker of a lily flower she had stuck on her desk as a way to secretly honor the grandmother who had died long before she was born. Of the same cancer that she was probably fighting herself.