Katsuki stood frozen in place, the world around him dimming as the boy in front of him glowed like an angel arm outstretched. His muscles tensed and his hearing faded leaving only the pounding of his own heart and the rasping of his breath to rage in his ears. The floor felt as if it was tilting under him and the room spinning out of control. Distantly he thought to himself that he might be having a panic attack. He couldn't move, everything in him told him to ravage the boy in front of him, that they both wanted it and it was only right to take him but at the same time he knew it was wrong and that the other boy was not in the right frame of mind. He remained in place, feet rooted to the floor as the internal battle raged inside him.
He watched as Deku frowned slightly, dropping his arm and turned back to face him. He stared at the way the light cascaded over his skin as he moved, showing every ripple of muscle, every scar, every bruise in all its horrifying glory but he couldn't look away, drinking in the sight of him and savouring it. The moment stretched for eternity to Katsuki, but it was over too soon as Deku stretched his hand out to him again, but Katsuki still couldn't move. Like a statue he stood as Deku slowly walked over to him, his bare feet padding lightly over the short distance between them.
Their eyes locked as Deku reached him and stretched out his hand to Katsuki's cheek causing him to tense, a flirty look playing across the other boy's face. Katsuki could now see his heart beating around the edge of his vision, it was as if the room itself pounded but Deku remained in sharp focus before him. Katsuki watched as the other boy leaned closer ever so slowly. First he felt Deku's breath on his lips, which sent fire through his veins like a fuse being lit. Then Deku gently trailed his tongue along Katsuki's lower lip and the fuse hit home, causing the bomb that was Katsuki to explode into life. The world came back into life, the music pounding around them suddenly registered to Katsuki's ears and without thinking he grabbed the other boy's body and slammed it into his own, pressing their lips violently together.
Deku let out a small sound of pleasure and responded by wrapping his arms around Kaachan's neck, pulling them even deeper into the kiss. They explored each other for a long moment before Katsuki noticed that his face felt wet and he opened his eyes to look at Deku expecting to see him crying but frowned when he saw that wasn't the case and pulled back slightly. It took him a moment to realise he was the one crying but Deku just raised his hand and wiped the tears away with a smile, his eyes appearing almost glassy which Katsuki attributed to the high.
"It's okay Kaachan," Deku whispered with a small smile playing on his lips and Kaachan nodded. It felt as if he could finally be free from the weight, the shame and the guilt he had been carrying for years about his sexuality and that he was finally able to treat Deku the way he had always wanted to deep down but had been too afraid to.
"It's not Izuku, but it will be," Kaachan returned the smile and closed the gap between them quickly sweeping Deku off of his feet eliciting a burst of giggles from the smaller boy as he carried him over to the side of the bed and placing him down.
Katsuki quickly removed his shirt, kicked off his shoes and removed his jeans before crawling onto the bed, and settling above the green haired boy on all fours. He took in the sight below him, from the messy green curls, slightly out of focus eyes, the pink blush in his cheeks, the flushed red lips currently being held between his teeth in a cheeky smile, to further down his pale chest and finally resting on the hardness between the others legs and grinning.
Looking up, he leaned down and began kissing Izuku's cheek, slowly moving to his ear and gently lapping at it with his tongue and being rewarded with sweet mewls of pleasure. He continued kissing down, pausing at Izuku's neck for a short while as the attention there made the other boy squirm under him, but he had a goal in mind and slowly continued down to his torso. Again he stopped, giving each side attention, able to feel Izuku's heart beating and burning skin through the kisses. Continuing down with slow deliberate kisses he shuffled backwards and settled between Izuku's thighs, kissing close to his hardness but carrying on passed it and along one thigh instead, which made the other boy whine in displeasure and Katsuki chuckled.
"Is there something you want?" Katsuki spoke with a husky growl to his voice before swapping to the other thigh and slowly kissing upwards.
"Please Kaachan… please…" Izuku spoke with a plea in his voice which made Katsuki grin as he continued kissing, getting ever closer to the goal.
"Oh how can I deny you now, after you've asked so nicely," Katsuki said and without warning moved to Izuku's hard member, taking the base in one hand and began to kiss along its full length, moving up and down.
'Fuck, I am finally doing this. The noises he's making are so fucking hot too, fuck,' Katsuki thought to himself, completely forgetting how high izuki was, before finally opening his mouth and taking Deku's full length inside, all other thoughts forgotten. Izuku's hands immediately flew to Katsuki's hair and threaded tightly into it, while letting out a loud moan and throwing his head back. He held gently as Katsuki began to slowly bob his head, using his tongue to lick along the length and his lips to keep a tight seal.
'Man, he even fucking tastes good too, I can't believe I've been missing out on this all this fucking time,' Katsuki thought as he could feel his own hardness growing quickly.
He slowly released the hand on the base of Izuku's hardness, which had now become wet with Katsuki's saliva as it dripped down from his head bobbing. He moved his hand down to Izuku's hole and used the saliva as a lube, very gently pressing in one finger while still working his mouth. This caused Izuku to gasp and involuntarily push Katsuki's head down causing him to gag slightly and pull his head sharply away to cough.
"Oh my god, I'm so sorry!" Izuku squeaked and covered his mouth with his hands, eyes wide and still slightly unfocused and staring at the spluttering blonde. When Katsuki had recovered, his eyes narrowed and he spoke in a quiet commanding voice. "You will be. Keep your hands by your head, or else," he finished with a wink making Izuku shiver before going back to work, taking Izuku fully in his mouth and again being rewarded with a magnificent moan of pleasure.
"Oh moreee, please Kaachan, feels soo good,"
Katsuki slowly worked his finger inside, slipping it in and out before gently adding a second, much to the green haired boy's pleasure. He worked his mouth and fingers in unison while looking for 'the spot'. It wasn't long before he found it and Izuku's body arched suddenly as he hit it.
"Ahhh, Kaachan I-I'm going to c-cum if you, ahh, if you k-keep at it like, oh god, like t-that," Izuku said with a breathy voice, to which Katsuki responded by quickening his pace. It took only seconds after he had spoken to release into Katsuki's mouth with a loud moan and lots of squirming.
Katsuki gently removed his fingers and sat up, licking his lips absentmindedly, wiping some off his face with the other hand and licking that up too before glancing up at Izuku who had a dumbfounded look on his face.
"What?" Katsuki said confused, glancing down at himself as if to find something wrong before looking back up.
"You… swallowed it?" Izuku squeaked, still slightly out of breath.
"Oh that, yeah of course I did. You taste fucking delicious I couldn't help it," this made Izuku turn a brilliant shade of red and bury his face in his hands. Katsuki just grinned and glanced down.
"You're still hard Deku…" Katsuki growled with a grin, making Izuku peak out behind his hands and nod sheepishly with a giggle.
"Well, so am I," Katsuki kneeled up and hooked his thumbs into the top of his boxers pulling them down and revealing his own hard member making Izuku almost purr at the sight of it. The green haired boy leaned over to the table and grabbed a small bottle before carefully throwing it to Katsuki who caught it with ease.
Glancing at the bottle he grinned and opened the cap, quickly pouring some lube onto himself and onto Izuku's hole before closing it and abandoning the bottle on the bed.
"What was it you said early?" Katsuki grinned and Izuku smiled, biting his lip before seductively whispering a response.
"Please Kaachan, I want you to fuck me."
"Ha, gladly Deku," he punctuated the last word with a thrust of his hips, pushing deep inside, making the smaller boy arch his back and let out a moan. Giving him no time to adjust to his size filling him up, Katsuki began thrusting his hips, enjoying the sensation of how tight Izuku's hole was gripping him. But the angle wasn't allowing him to get deep enough for his liking, so he scooped up Izuku's legs by the back of each knee and pushed them up towards his head. This instantly allowed him to get deeper, making Izuku moan even more beneath him. Izuku was tossing and turning his head, eyes tightly shut as he moaned and panted in pleasure.
They were both sweating now, lost in their joint pleasure as Katsuki continued to pound into Izuku, repeatedly hitting his spot every time, it wasn't long before they were both ready to cum. Katsuki moved one hand to Izuku's member and began to rub it in time with his thrusts, this made Izuku almost scream and he grabbed one of the pillows on the bed and bit the corner of it to try and contain himself but it didn't work. Within seconds they were both exploding with their pleasure, and Izuku completely deflated under Katsuki, going light headed and dazed at the strength of the orgasm, unable to speak or move as he nearly passed out. But Katsuki had other plans.
Without saying anything he quickly flipped Izuku over, making him squeak in confusion, pulling his butt up into the air and pushing his chest and face down into the bed. Katsuki leaned down, and whispered in his ear.
"Sorry Deku, but I'm not fucking done yet. I can't control myself when you're making fucking noises like that under me, so I'm going to fuck you again." And with that he straightened back up, lined himself up and slammed into Izuku again, grabbing tightly onto his hips, using them as leverage as Deku moaned into the bed sheets, gripping the sheets tightly in his hands, feeling himself get hard almost instantly again.
After a few minutes Katsuki slowed to an almost agonisingly slow pace, pulling all the way out before slowly pushing all the way back in again but Izuku was having none of it.
"Kaachan please…" he breathed and Katsuki stopped completely, making Izuku whimper.
"If you want it, take it nerd," Katsuki said with a chuckle and after a brief pause Izuku started to move his hips, grinding up against Katsuki and purring like a cat. Katsuki rocked his head backwards and shut his eyes briefly, letting out a breathy, "Such a good fucking boy Deku, fuckkk."
Izuku suddenly stopped and pulled completely away and kneeled up, turning to face a dazed and confused, fully erect Katsuki. Izuku quickly pulled Katsuki down and had him lay on the bed before straddling him, sliding down onto Katsuki's hardness making them both let out a little groan of pleasure. Izuku sat for a moment, adjusting to the new position and angle, taking a few deep breaths. Katsuki used the brief pause to run his hands up Izuku's thighs and hips, stroking them and enjoying the sensation of the soft skin on his fingertips before moving one hand to Izuku's hardness and gently gripping onto it.
Izuku began to move his hips, grinding down onto Katsuki, very quickly upping the pace and panting hard, Izuku's eyes almost rolling back into his head, while Katsuki stroked Izuku's hardness and drank in the sight of the boy above him writhing in pleasure because of his cock.
"I'm going to c-cum kaachan, c-can I?" Izuku spoke while panting.
"Fucking cum for me Deku," Katsuki growled and within seconds they were both finishing, moaning in pleasure and Izuku collapsed onto of him as Katsuki wrapped his arms around the green haired boy and kisses his forehead.
They lay there for a few moments, catching their breath before Izuku wriggled off of him and lay with his back to Katsuki, quietly mumbling, "Cuddle me, " to which Katsuki graciously accepted.
For the next two hours they lay without talking, Izuku dozed off and Katsuki gently played with Izuku's hair, breathing in his scent, thinking to himself that maybe things could finally be different now. How he could be with Izuku properly, finally tell him how he's felt for so many years and make up for how poorly he'd treated him.
But that wasn't meant to be.
Katsuki was twiddling a piece of Izuku's hair around one of his fingers, when suddenly the atmosphere around Izuku changed imperceptibly. It had been a few hours since they had stopped and Izuku and seemingly slept for all that time. Katsuki frowned, leaning up on to his elbow to properly look down at Izuku.
He noticed there was suddenly a tension in his shoulders that hadn't been there a moment ago, his skin was shining with beads of sweat and an intense heat seemed to radiate from his skin.
"Deku, are you alr..?" Katsuki spoke quietly but was cut off by Izuku suddenly sitting up and swinging his legs off the bed. He gripped the edge of the mattress so tightly his knuckles had turned white. Katsuki sat up quickly too, staring at Izuku's back which was now visibly trembling.
"Izuku what's wro..?" but he was cut off again.
"Shut up!" Izuku nearly shouted back at Katsuki who froze at the tone of voice, uncertain of what to do. He stretched out his hand to rub Izuku's back in reassurance and to try to calm him down but as soon as his fingers reached his skin, Izuku sprung into life all but propelling himself from the bed as he whipped around to face Katsuki. As their eyes met Katsuki's blood ran cold and he knew he'd fucked up really badly this time.
"Don't touch me, don't you ever touch me again! I can't believe I let you do that, I should never have come in here with you! This was all a mistake!" Deku began to scream at Katsuki, tears pouring down his red scrunched up face, hands pressed over his ears and he sobbed. It finally clicked in Katsuki's brain what was happening, and he immediately felt sick knowing he was not well equipped enough to deal with this, but knew he had to try.
"Izuku, I think you're coming down, those drugs.. I mean this is the drugs talking…" but again he was cut off.
"Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Stop it, stop talking, leave me alone! It's not the drugs, stop lying! This is how I've felt for ages! I never want to see you again! Ever! Just leave me like you always have before!" Izuku now screamed as he backed up against the wall, still pressing his hands over his ears, eyes shut tight. Katsuki stood up from the bed feeling utterly helpless, he stared at Izuku as the boy slid to the floor and began hugging his knees and sobbing while rocking slightly and shaking his head.
Tears began to well in Katsuki's eyes, and stiffly he moved to get his clothes. His body felt so heavy that he couldn't move quickly but he moved as swiftly as he could. While collecting his own clothes he also located all of Izuku's and folded them into a neat pile. When he was dressed he crouched down in front of Izuku at least a meter away so as to not scare the boy any further and spoke in the softest whisper he could manage.
"Here," he said as he placed the clothes on the floor, making Izuku finally look up. Their eyes met again and all Katsuki could see in them was a manic uncontrollable fear, and In that moment his heart broke. Whether the drugs were the catalyst or not didn't matter. He could see the years of damage and torture he had inflicted on Izuku burned into his eyes as if left there by a branding iron. There was no hope of forgiveness, no salvation from the damage he had caused, and he knew that now. Tears flowed freely from Katsuki's eyes as he stared into Izuku's pained ones and he wished he could take it all back. Glancing down to the floor he spoke quietly and quickly.
"It doesn't make it right, it doesn't change what I've done to you, but… I am sorry, for everything. I will never talk to you again, I will stay away from you, and never ever touch you ever again, I promise you this." he spoke with a quiver in his voice and mentally added to himself 'because I love you Izuku, and I will hate myself everyday for the rest of my life for what I've done to you.'
With that he stood and quickly left the room without looking back for fear his heart would give out.
He blindly ran from the room and towards the exit, without looking where he was going, tears streaming down his face. He hadn't even left the corridor of private rooms when suddenly bumped into someone and looked up, instantly recoiling at the person's dry cracking face and red eyes.
"Watch where you're going you crispy fucking arsehole" Katsuki snapped with a menacing glare.
"My my, you should watch that explosive temper of yours, it might get you into trouble one day. Oh wait, it already did Kaachan." The man sneered and Katsuki frowned bewildered at how this stranger knew Deku's nickname for him but before he could reply he heard running footsteps and someone's voice shouting.
"Sir, I'm sorry Deku is with another customer right now! He isn't available, please wait!" the owner of the voice turned into view and stopped suddenly at the sight of Katsuki standing there. "Oh." Kirishima said, "My apologies, he is now free, urm you may…" Kirishima trailed off as the man turned his back and stormed off in the direction of Deku's private room. Kirishima turned to Katsuki with a smile which quickly turned to a look of horror.
"Oh man… it didn't go well huh?" Katsuki just shrugged and stood there looking dejected. Kirishima glanced at his watch quickly and then threw his arm around Katsuki's shoulders leading him to the exit.
"I'm just about to finish up for the evening, why don't we go somewhere quieter, get a drink and you can tell me all about it man," Kirishima laughed and the two left together, Katsuki not really aware of what was going on.