The Badfamily
1:
INT. A THERAPIST'S OFFICE - DAY
Bruce lies on a reclining couch. Dinah sits by the head,
making notes.
BRUCE:
All I know is...something is very,
very wrong with my life.
EXT. GCPD ROOF - NIGHT
The Batsignal is on. Police Commissioner Gordon stands by
the Signal, waiting.
LOW ANGLE
Out of the shadows emerges the Joker (seen from behind)
with a gun in his hand. Harley Quinn appears beside him,
and then Riddler, Penguin and Freeze appear beside them.
COMMISSIONER GORDON
It's him again.
JOKER
Batman? (chuckles)
Commissioner Gordon looks stern. Joker chuckles some more.
COMMISSIONER GORDON
Who else?
AERIAL SHOT
Gotham City. It looks debauched, with yellow smoke
streaming from chimneys and sordid apartment buildings with
their windows open.
BACK IN DINAH'S OFFICE
DINAH
And what is so very wrong with it?
Bruce rises from the couch and goes to the glass window,
looking down at the city.
BRUCE
You're supposed to be telling me.
WIDE SHOT.
AN ARENA FULL OF PEOPLE, WITH A LIGHTED STAGE.
Nightwing, lighted with disco lamps, performs aerial stunts
on a trapeze along with Starfire. Panicked screams and
shouts fill the air.
CAMERA PULLS
OUT
Red Hood and Robin stand with guns and sword out
respectively. Several people lie on the floor wounded and
bleeding out, and many more are gagged and tied up. A small
girl bleats in terror.
Robin looks down at her in disgust, and in one swing of his
katana, decapitates her. A man and a woman cry out in
horror. The woman breaks down into sobs as the man next to
her tries to comfort her. Both are tied up and bloody.
RED HOOD
That was mean, kid. Say sorry to
the poor lady.
Robin picks up the little girl's head from the floor, and
kisses it on the lips. Then he tosses the head into the
woman's lap. The woman shrieks again, and starts sobbing
even louder.
THE MAN
(Snarls.) Fuck you!
RED HOOD
(sighs) I guess...you're next? The
demon monkey hasn't gotten all of
it out of his system yet.
Robin turns around and glares at Red Hood. Then he starts
laughing. Red Hood begins laughing too.
ROBIN
Don't be silly, Todd. I wouldn't
deprive them of life after this.
RED HOOD
Kid, you're a regular psycho. I
wish your dad was here, to see
this.
ROBIN
(Serious.) He would be proud.
RED HOOD
Yeah, sure, kid. Whatever you
gotta tell yourself.
ON THE STAGE
Nightwing and Starfire start dancing to a pop song which
fills the air. There are cheers and whistles from the
audience.
Down below, Kid Flash and Superboy (Conner) are holding
machine guns into faces and yelling.
KID FLASH
Cheer for that pretty, pretty
pretty boy up there on that stage.
That's our boy! Hey! Cheer or I'll
An explosion is heard. Red Hood removes his helmet, to
reveal a face wearing a domino mask.
RED HOOD
That's late, even for them.
He puts the helmet back on, and picks up two machine guns
and aims them towards the entrance of the arena where there
is a crowd, and begins shooting randomly. People fall.
Another explosion is heard.
ROBIN
Is that one of ours, or theirs?
RED HOOD
Theirs, stupidhead.
ROBIN
You're stupider than me.
RED HOOD
Probably, if it's you I'm hanging
out with.
Robin unsheathes his katana. They both assume combat
positions.
A creepy, distorted laugh fills the air. Red Hood and Robin
adopt a back-to back stance. Up on the stage, Nightwing and
Starfire continue their erotic dance unconcernedly.
NIGHTWING (ON THE COMM)
You guys okay out there?
RED HOOD
You just have fun, birthday boy.
Leave these losers to us.
NIGHTWING
It's Joker. Are you guys sure?
A van stops outside. The door opens and Harley Quinn
somersaults out. She is dressed in her pink-and-blue
pigtails outfit.
CONNER (V.O.)
Are you kidding me? Of course
we're sure. Or have you not yet
noticed the fact that...umm...I'm
here?
NIGHTWING (V.O.)
Don't underestimate them.
RED HOOD
Chill, bird boy. Have a great
time. Dance, fuck, live. We're
here to take care of the ninnies.
DISSOLVE TO
Chaos, people running around, explosions everywhere.
Superboy lies in a pool of green vomit. Flash lies next to
him, his legs clearly broken and bent out of shape. Next to
him is Robin, gagged and bound, staring up at the camera.
Red Hood lies next to him, his helmet smashed.
JOKER (O.S.)
The ninnies are here to take care
of you.(Laughs)
Harley Quinn sashays into the scene, carrying Nightwing's
body over her shoulder.
JOKER (O.S.) (cont'd)
Say something, bird boy.
POV SHOT
The children all lie in various states of visible physical
distress, but none of them makes a sound.
HARLEY QUINN
I love you, puddin'. Even more
than I love Nightwing's ass.
JOKER
Gross.
NIGHTWING
I agree. My ass is no match for
any part of your boyfriend.
JOKER
There's a quip in there just
waiting to come alive, but I'm
going to exercise some self
restraint.
RED HOOD
That's a new low even for you.
HARLEY QUINN
(puzzled) I'm not sure what that
means, and I have like...three
PhDs.
RED HOOD
Pretty sure last time you had two.
NIGHTWING
They multiply.
KID FLASH
(groans) That's not how PhD's
work.
NIGHTWING
I was being sarcastic.
JOKER
Enough. This isn't Saturday Night
Live. Now I'm-
HARLEY QUINN
Yeah, baby! Show 'em.
JOKER
Stop interrupting, Harley.
HARLEY QUINN
I love you.
JOKER
(sighs) Yes, how many times do we
have to establish that? Every two
minutes?
HARLEY QUINN
Sorry, I thought "I love you" was-
I thought we'd agreed "I love you"
was code for "I see Mr. Batman?"
JOKER
What? When did we establish that?
CAMERA TURNS AROUND
Batman stands with his hands on his hips.
BATMAN
Let them go. Now.
JOKER
Batman! It's been too long.
BATMAN
It really hasn't.
JOKER
Your boys have sure left a fun
trail for the GCPD to clean up.
Twenty-eight bodies, and counting.
BATMAN
It's Nightwing's birthday.
JOKER
Uh...okay. That...happens four or
five times every year. I mean, how
many different times was the kid
born? And I really don't see what
homicide has to do with
celebrating a birthday. I mean, in
my family we did cake and a
barbecue at McDonalds-
Batman punches Joker. Joker evades, then squeezes a flower
on his shirt. Acid streams onto Batman's face. Batman opens
his mouth and shows a pink sliver of his tongue, as if he
is in ecstasy. We see his face sizzle, the acid corroding
his skin. Batman smiles. Joker recoils in disgust, and
punches Batman in the chest, right into the Bat-symbol.
Batman catches Joker's fist, then turns it. A crunching
sound is heard.
BATMAN
You talk too much.
JOKER
I know. Even my psychiatrist has
brought it up. She finds that
she...spaces out. I literally talk
her out of her own mind.
HARLEY QUINN
I thought I was your psychiatrist!
She lunges at Batman with her baseball bat, but her face is
turned toward the prostrate Joker, screwed up with fury.
Batman evades her easily, and begins choking her. Then he
leans in, and starts sniffing at her neck, while she
squirms in his grip.
BATMAN
He doesn't deserve you. He never
has.
HARLEY QUINN
Who's he been seeing? You're the
World's Greatest Detective, do ya
know?
JOKER
Harley!
NIGHTWING (O.S.)
Uh, not to hurry you, B, but I
really have to pee. Like right,
right now.
Nightwing struggles with his restraints. Superboy looks at
him sadly, his eyes distant.
JOKER
Batman. Leave Harley alone. (He
begins laughing uncontrollably,
and makes violent facial
contortions.)
Batman starts licking Harley's neck. She squeals.
BATMAN
Hmmm.
HARLEY QUINN
Get away from me, you disgusting
fuck. Also, how much do I gotta
pay you ta find out who Mr Jay
been seeing?
JOKER
Honey, we can figure all our shit
out after Batsy's in prison. I
promise. I'll-I'll recommit. I
mean I'll-I'll stop-
Batman crunches into Joker's ribs with his steel tipped
shoe. Joker grunts. Then he licks his red lips, and smiles,
and looks up at Batman.
JOKER
You've gotta pay. For your
arrogance. For you stupidity. For
your sheer...madness. You're
insanity. You're darkness, chaos
personified, you're the most evil,
selfish, ruthless-
ROBIN
Father!
Batman turns.
ROBIN (cont'd)
I have successfully undone my
restraints. However...my left
tibia is broken, and I need help
to...
Batman drops Harley, and runs and scoops Robin off the
ground. He cradles him. Robin is clearly in pain, and as
clearly trying to mask it. Batman starts whispering in his
ear, all that is heard is a low humming. He whips around
and starts striding towards the Batmobile, which is parked
in the distance.
SUPERBOY
That's it, I'm out. Somebody
kindly clear up my kryptonite
vomit.
He shakes off his restraints and flies out. Kid Flash wakes
up and stares around.
KID FLASH
(mumbles) Nightwing okay?
NIGHTWING
No. I peed my pants.
RED HOOD
Ditto.
KID FLASH
Ugh. You Batboys are disgusting.
First the necrophilia, and then
all the peeing, and then the...
JOKER
What? Who's a necrophile?
KID FLASH
Oops.
Nightwing and Red Hood glare at Kid Flash. Kid Flash
chuckles nervously, then gets up groaning, snaps his bones
into place, and zaps out.
Nightwing and Red Hood look at Joker. All around Joker lie
the disabled members of Batman's Rogue gallery: Freeze,
Penguin and Riddler.
Joker smiles creepily.
JOKER
One of these days, boys, daddy
ain't gonna be around to save you.
Red Hood and Nightwing look at each other, then burst out
laughing. Joker looks confused.
NIGHTWING
You're hilarious, man.
JOKER
Thank you. I try.
CUT TO
INT. BRUCE'S DRESSING ROOM - NIGHT
Opera music swells around as Alfred quietly puts on Bruce's
cufflinks.
INT. AN OPERA HALL - NIGHT
EXTREME CLOSE UP
Tears glisten in Bruce's eyes as he listens to Carmen. The
opera singer on the stage is a beautiful woman dressed in
red. We see the acid scar on Bruce's face, and he touches
it tenderly, his eyes fixed on the woman on stage.
BRUCE (V.O)
When I was young, my father took
me to the opera, along with my
mother.
DISSOLVE TO:
EXT. THE WAYNE MANOR GROUNDS - NIGHT
Thomas Wayne puts a hand on Bruce's shoulder. Martha Wayne
stands behind them, and the three of them look up at the
stars.
INT. THE OPERA HALL STAGE - NIGHT
BRUCE (V.O.)
She's exquisite.
Sitting next to Bruce is Jason Todd, dressed immaculately
in a black tie suit.
JASON
You pervert.
Bruce smiles.
CUT TO:
INT. A ROOM - NIGHT
A mirror glistens, revealing a luxuriously appointed
bedroom, while a woman sings an aria in the background.
Suddenly, a woman screams. A dress rips apart.
WOMAN
You coward!
Batman stands in the closet, smelling a woman's clothes.
Behind him the opera singer lies on the floor, on a torn
red dress.
The music continues to play. Batman turns around. His eyes
are deadly.
BATMAN
You shouldn't have said that.
CUT TO:
INT./EXT. AN UNDERGROUND CAVE - NIGHT
Bruce, as a boy, has just fallen into an underground cave
full of bats, who have attacked him, leaving claw marks on
his face and some tears on his shirt. He huddles into a
corner, weeping. Bats encircle him, and then just as
suddenly, they're gone. Thomas Wayne descends into the pit
on a rope.
THOMAS WAYNE
Son. Son! What happened?
BRUCE:
(Sniffles.) Bu-bu-bats, daddy.
There's...there were...bats.
THOMAS WAYNE
(Skeptically.) Bats.
THOMAS WAYNE (V.O.)
The kid's gone cuckoo, Martha.
He's seeing things everywhere.
Bogeymen.
THOMAS WAYNE
Come here, kid.
Thomas Wayne goes down on one knee and extends his arms to
Bruce. Bruce sniffs, tears running down his face, and
shakes his head. He wraps his arms tighter around his knees
and huddles deeper into the pit.
THOMAS WAYNE (cont'd)
(Patiently sighs.) Why do we fall,
Bruce?
Bruce looks up into his father's calm eyes.
DISSOLVE TO:
EXT. A GARDEN - DAY
LOW
Bruce and a girl run around a garden, laughing. Laughter
rings in the air like an echo, but almost ghostly.
THOMAS WAYNE (V.O.)
We fall when we're cowards. We
rise when we've decided we aren't
anymore.
CUT TO:
INT./EXT. PIT - NIGHT
THOMAS WAYNE
(Gently) Are you a coward, Bruce?
Bruce shakes his head tearfully.
THOMAS WAYNE (cont'd)
(Gently) Yes you are. But I can
teach you not to be.
Thomas Wayne's mouth opens, like a terrifying cave, and
bats fly out of it into Bruce's face. Bruce screams.
SNAP CUT TO
INT. DICK'S BEDROOM - NIGHT
Dick screams. He gets up from bed and rushes out.
BRUCE (V.O)
No, no, no Dickie. No no no.
INT. BRUCE'S BEDROOM - NIGHT
Bruce cradles Dick's head on his chest. Dick sighs and sobs
uncontrollably. Bruce wraps his arms around Dick tightly
and hums and rocks.
OVERHEAD SHOT
Bruce whispers into Dick's ear. Dick's sobs turn into
giggles. Bruce and Dick laugh.
INT. DINAH'S OFFICE - NIGHT
Bruce stands in front of the floor-to-ceiling window.
DINAH
Maybe you just need convincing.
BRUCE
Convincing of what?
DINAH
That you're real.
INT. A DRAWING ROOM - DAY
DINAH (O.S.)
We all need it from time to time.
BRUCE (O.S.)
Even Clark?
Two children stand with their father. A woman kneels in the
center of the room. There is a gun in her mouth, and her
finger is on the trigger.
OVERHEAD SHOT
Batman looms behind the woman. His shadow lies athwart her.
Nightwing and Red Hood stand behind the man and the two
children, with guns pointed at their heads.
WIDE SHOT
The two children are sobbing. The man is trying to look
stoical, but failing spectacularly.
THE MAN
Joker will know about this. And
when he does, he-he-
He breaks down. Nightwing comes and encircles him from
behind, gently.
NIGHTWING
It's okay. Let it out.
RED HOOD
(Snorts.)
BATMAN
(Growls.) Go ahead, Emma. You were
in the middle of something.
Emma lets out one sob, then shoots herself. Her brains
splatter back on Batman's cape. Batman looks down at it
stoically, then looks into the distance.
EXT. (FLASHBACK) AN ALLEY - NIGHT
Martha Wayne's brains splatter on Bruce's shirt as she
falls. Bruce looks down at it in disbelief and terror, then
screams. The dark shadow holding the gun races away.
INT. EMMA'S DRAWING ROOM - DAY
Red Hood jams the gun into the back of boys' heads. One of
them shuts his eyes, but the other one glares up at Batman.
Batman looks at this boy with interest, then kneels so he
is face-to-face with him, and continues to examine him with
his eyes fascinatedly.
The boy maintains eye contact.
Batman hands the boy his mother's gun. Red Hood takes in a
sharp breath and moves forward to intercept, but Nightwing
holds him back.
RED HOOD
What the-
The boy holds the gun up to Batman's head. He breathes
heavily. The man rolls his eyes and collapses onto the
ground, his arms wrapped around his knees. He rocks back
and forth, but no one looks at him.
BATMAN
No one's stopping you.
The screen goes black. There is a click of a trigger. Then
the boy opens his eyes.
P.O.V. SHOT
THE BOY
You're still here.
He looks down and examines the gun, then throws it away.
THE BOY (cont'd)
You're a coward!
BATMAN
There's that word again.
Batman picks up the gun and shoots the boy.
NIGHTWING
Was that really necessary?
The man lets out a long, low moan, hugging himself. The
other boy shakes himself loose from Red Hood's grip and
runs around him and out of the room.
Red Hood shoots the man.
NIGHTWING (cont'd)
(Sighs.) Also, was that really
necessary?
BATMAN AND RED HOOD
(Together.) No.
CUT TO:
INT. BRUCE'S BEDROOM - NIGHT
Carmen plays. Bruce picks up Emma's corpse, and lays it
lovingly on his bed. He touches her face tenderly, which
has now been restored to its former beauty. He touches her
breasts. Her body has taken on a very light shade of blue.
Her flesh looks like cold marble.
BRUCE
You're beautiful.
EMMA
I don't care.
BRUCE
I'm not going to hurt you.
EMMA
Somehow it matters less and less.
BRUCE
Yes. That happens. Eventually.
Bruce unzips his pants.
BRUCE (cont'd)
Touch me.
Emma's hand rises, and fondles Bruce's penis.
EMMA
Is that what it feels like?
BRUCE
You're forgotten?
EMMA
Already. Living flesh. Diseased.
Bruce smiles, and kisses Emma deeply. Emma kisses him back,
and wraps her hands around his head, then brings him down
to her breast. Bruce sucks on a nipple. Blood flows out,
and into his mouth. Emma wraps her legs around Bruce, and
Bruce sinks into her with a moan.
BRUCE
Sing. For me. Emma.
Emma begins to sing an aria, while Bruce moves
rhythmically, in and out.
AERIAL SHOT
Bruce's bedroom is completely white. Bruce, who is
completely clothed in black, has sex with Emma's unmoving
body. A red stain shows on the white sheets, between Emma's
legs.
"Like a Virgin" starts playing.
BRUCE (V.O.)
There is nothing purer than death.
FADE IN TO
INT. A DINER - DAY
Clark and Bruce sit at a table. Clark gives Bruce a wide
smile. Bruce's face is expressionless.
CLARK
So...how'd the weekend pass for
you?
BRUCE
Great, Clark. It was great.
CLARK
Did anything interesting?
BRUCE
Some reading.
CLARK
Aaaaaaand?
BRUCE
(sighs) Met a fascinating woman.
CLARK
There it is. Knew it was
something. You're positively
glowing.
BRUCE
Hm.
CLARK
Sooooooo? Deets, deets! Where're
the deets?
Bruce scrunches up his face and rolls his eyes. Clark
laughs and punches Bruce in the arm.
CLARK (cont'd)
So...when's the date?
BRUCE
Ummm...
CLARK
Don't tell me you haven't asked
her out yet, man! You've got the
biggest balls this side of the
galaxy!
BRUCE
(Stoical.) Thank you.
CLARK
So?
BRUCE
Actually...
CLARK
You didn't...
Clark's face falls. He looks around for relief, and mops
his brow with a handkerchief.
CLARK (cont'd)
Oh. So it was like...that.
BRUCE
(Sternly.) Yes.
Clark grimaces, and takes a sip of his coffee, then spits
it out.
CLARK
I don't know, man. Maybe one of
these days you should actually
give someone a chance.
BRUCE
A chance.
CLARK
Yeah! Like, you know, you gave me!
A chance to make you happy, you
weirdo. A chance to-show you-
Bruce looks out of the window, distracted. Clark's voice
fades into the distance.
CLARK (cont'd)
-an island. Bruce?
BRUCE
Huh?
CLARK
Look at me.
Bruce looks at Clark with a mild expression of surprise.
Clark puts his hand over Bruce's, and takes it between his
hands. Bruce's face telegraphs mild shock.
CLARK (cont'd)
I said, no man is an island.
BRUCE
Very...original.
CLARK
(Ignores him.)
Look, even you. Someday, you'll
find someone who could really make
you happy, and how're you gonna,
you know, have a relationship with
them, if you, you know...
Clark mimes slitting his throat. Uncomfortable, Bruce
extricates his hand from Clark's.
CLARK (cont'd)
(whispers)
You can't be with a dead person.
That's just another way of being
alone.
BRUCE
People's hearts belong to them.
I'm uncomfortable with that.
Clark leans back and lets out a deep breath.
CLARK
You just feel like no one could
really love you as you are.
Bruce looks out of the window again, into the distance, but
his eyes are clearly elsewhere.
BRUCE
(In a low,
menacing
monotone.)
And that's all I can take of your
armchair psychotherapy this week.
Bruce gets up and walks out of the diner. The bell chimes
as he shuts the door rather forcefully after himself. Clark
sighs, then pays the bill and gets up and goes after him.
As Clark walks to the entrance of the diner, he sees a
pretty waitress who he evidently knows. She gives him a
wink. Clark pulls her in for a kiss.
CLARK
Hey, sugar.
The waitress giggles. Clark walks out.
WAITRESS
He's...such a charmer.
WAITRESS #2
Too bad he's gay.
WAITRESS #1
For the grumpy one? Don't know
what anybody could see in the guy.
They giggle.
EXT. BRUCE'S CAR - DAY
Clark gets into Bruce's Mercedes. Bruce determinedly
ignores him. Clark reaches over and stops the engine, then
takes out the key and stuffs it into his pocket.
CLARK
Scored something.
BRUCE
I hope it's coke.
CLARK
And K.
BRUCE
(Perfectly expressionless.) You
dog.
Clark laughs, and removes two packets of white powder from
his pocket and a black lead box, which he hands to Bruce.
CLARK
Would you do the honors?
Bruce turns around so his back is to Clark, and opens the
box. It contains a fine, glowing green powder. He takes a
pinch out, and closes the box, then turns around and hands
the box back to Clark.
Clark hands over one of the packets of cocaine over to
Bruce. Bruce sprinkles in the green powder, then shakes it
up and gives it back.
Bruce and Clark snort lines of cocaine from the dashboard
while "Tomorrow Never Knows" plays over the radio. They
drive down a road with the top down, the wind ruffling
their hair. Clark leans back as his world turns rainbow
colored, while Bruce's world turns into a film-noir-black
and-white.
CLARK (cont'd)
How was Nightwing's birthday?
BRUCE
He performed on stage and got to
fuck Starfire in front of an
audience, so I'd say it was on the
whole pretty pleasant.
CLARK
Hmm. You ever think-
BRUCE
No.
CLARK
What? I was gonna say...
BRUCE
Please don't.
CLARK
I'm just saying-
BRUCE
No.
CLARK
Grandchildren! You think Dick and
Kory have a future?
BRUCE
I hope not.
CLARK
C'mon! Can you imagine how
gorgeous their children would be?
BRUCE
No.
CLARK
Why not?
BRUCE
I want to die first. Besides, Kory
is an intergalactic sex slave.
CLARK
Was.
BRUCE
I'm not having a sex slave for my
daughter-in-law.
CLARK
Former sex slave. And c'mon, stop
being so bigoted. It's hardly like
she had a choice.
BRUCE
Every one of us has a choice. To
die, or to live in humiliation.
CLARK
That doesn't sound like much of a
choice to me.
BRUCE
Fuck her.
CLARK
She's good for him. I've never
seen him so happy.
BRUCE
Hm.
CUT TO:
INT. DINAH'S OFFICE - NIGHT
Dinah sits in the chair by the couch. Bruce stands with his
back to her, looking out over the city.
DINAH
Do you care for your children's
happiness?
Bruce turns back, and glares at her. Dinah looks unfazed.
BRUCE
What.
DINAH
I asked do you-
Bruce takes two strides and reaches Dinah's chair. He wraps
his fingers around her throat and lifts her with one hand.
Dinah looks at him sharply and makes no attempt to
struggle.
BRUCE
Do you care about Oliver?
Dinah makes no response.
BRUCE (cont'd)
There's your answer, doctor.
He lets go of Dinah. Dinah slumps down into her seat and
immediately picks up her writing pad, into which she begins
to feverishly scribble.
DINAH
Then if you care about your
children's happiness, I ask this
of you. Stop this. Live a regular
life.
Bruce turns to look at her. His look is inscrutable.
DINAH (cont'd)
As much as it is hard for you, do
it. For the sake of your children.
No more killing. No more hiding.
No more danger, no more deception.
No more secret identities. No
more...Batfamily. No more terror.
BRUCE
If I did not know you Dinah, I'd
think you were...going soft.
DINAH
(continues
earnestly)
I've lived all my life in hiding.
I know something of what it is
like to be afraid. To feel
trapped. To feel like you have
nowhere else to go, nothing else
to turn to. To feel you have to
keep doing this, that it's
inevitable. That all of it is..
the way it is, and can't be
otherwise.
Bruce looks at her with his eyelids lowered. He says
nothing, but continues to stand near the window, examining
Dinah.
DINAH (cont'd)
I'm not advocating that you change
for the sake of any grander
morality, or any god. I'm not
saying change so you can live a
good life, whatever that is, or be
a good person, because society
says so, and convention demands
it.
BRUCE
Yes, that is precisely what you-
DINAH
No! I'm saying change, because
deep down you are not like this.
Change, so you can become who you
are. You are a good person, Bruce
Wayne. I'm not, and I'm happy. You
aren't happy, because you are
good, and are trying too hard to
be the exact opposite every day of
your life.
BRUCE
(snickers)
What has gotten into you, Dinah?
DINAH
You asked me. What was wrong.
BRUCE
And how did you, dear Dinah,
arrive at this hackneyed
conclusion?
Dinah looks sadly away to a painting on the wall. Bruce
follows her gaze. The painting is a Pollock.
DINAH
Because last year you went to hell
to bring Damian back. You
sacrificed yourself to save-
BRUCE
You are immensely, singularly,
tremendously, stupid.
Bruce walks out of the office. Dinah sighs and looks down
into her notebook, where she has sketched a bat emerging
from its mother's protective wings, looking for the first
time into the world.
INT. THE WATCHTOWER: CONFERENCE ROOM.
The Justice League sits around an oval conference table. At
its head sits Superman. Around the table are Wonder Woman,
Green Lantern, Black Canary, Hawkgirl, Flash, Green Arrow,
Cyborg, Martian Manhunter and Aquaman.
GREEN LANTERN
And as usual, he's late.
GREEN ARROW
Fuck him, lets start. Any seconds?
Aquaman raises his hand. Slowly everyone else does too,
except Superman and Black Canary.
SUPERMAN
We do not start without Bruce.
There's no point, he's got all the
best ideas.
WONDER WOMAN
And the worst ones.
GREEN ARROW
Those too.
Just then Batman enters. Behind him enter Robin, Red Robin
and Nightwing. Batman takes a seat at the head of the table
while the boys form up behind him in a V, their weapons
drawn.
GREEN LANTERN
(snickers)
His highness is fashionably late.
Batman ignores him, and turns to Superman.
BATMAN
What have you got that required an
emergency meeting in the middle of
the goddamn day?
There is general snickering around the table, which
Superman quells with a look.
WONDER WOMAN
Actually, I was the one who called
the emergency meeting.
Batman examines her.
BATMAN
I see.
Wonder Woman presses a button. A hologram of a destroyed
Apokolips appears above the conference table.
WONDER WOMAN
I have received intel from a
source that Darkseid...isn't..
that is an accurate word
for the state we assumed he was
in. The source says he somehow
survived the planetary explosion
we caused, and is now plotting
revenge against us. Against Earth.
CYBORG
Said source has also revealed that
hordes of parademons from several
interdimensional portals are
swarming towards the ruins of
Apokolips. Darkseid calls to his
minions, and they answer.
Green Lantern props his feet on the table and yawns.
GREEN LANTERN
If only we had someone with the
God-awesome power to fuck
Apokolips, Darkseid and all his
parademons or whatever in their
collective arseholes, and like,
back into whatever primordial hell
they crawled out of.
Everyone looks at Superman. Superman blushes.
WONDER WOMAN
And where would be the fun in
that? If Kal took care of all our
enemies, which of us would have an
excuse to go on living? The glory
of the fight, the rush of victory,
the despair of defeat, the tragic
loss of friends, the extermination
of enemies, are these not what
make life-what give it zest? As
the daughter of Zeus, the Queen of
Themyscira, the First of the
Amazons and the Goddess of War, I
proclaim-
GREEN ARROW
Here we go.
Batman slams down his fist.
BATMAN
Enough.
Wonder Woman glares at him, and wraps her hand around her
sword hilt.
BATMAN (cont'd)
We are tired, Diana, of you and
your proclamations. Tired to
death.
FLASH
Hear, hear.
Wonder Woman withdraws her sword from its scabbard, and
frowns at Batman.
SUPERMAN
Diana, you are in violation of
every code of the League of
Justice. Put down your sword, or
face the consequences.
WONDER WOMAN
As if any of you would have the
courage to expel me.
Superman stands up, and moves towards Wonder Woman. Wonder
Woman suddenly hesitates, then recovers herself.
SUPERMAN
You only think about yourself.
MARTIAN MANHUNTER
Friends, let us not enter into
unnecessary squabbles. Not while
Darkseid-
WONDER WOMAN
It's been too long, Kal. Too long
since I've tasted blood. The blood
of victory, of the fight.
Her blue eyes suddenly look sad, pensive. She points her
sword towards the floor, then sheathes it.
WONDER WOMAN (cont'd)
I am ashamed. But I am not wrong.
NIGHTWING
Maybe you should try getting laid.
Everyone looks at him.
NIGHTWING (cont'd)
You know, by someone with a little
experience, someone who knows what
they are doing, in and out.
Nightwing wiggles his eyebrows suggestively. Batman groans.
BATMAN
Out.
NIGHTWING
But I-
BATMAN
(growls)
I said out.
ROBIN
But he's not wrong, father. Wonder
Woman's sex is probably collecting
cobwebs as we speak. Soon it will
be impenetrable.
Batman turns around and glares at Robin. Wonder Woman gets
up in rage, but Batman puts out his arm between her and his
son.
BATMAN
Damian. You...are expelled as
well. Leave.
RED ROBIN
But I can stay, right?
BATMAN
Yes.
ROBIN
But father! How-fair-Drake
(he chokes on his
own anger)
Nightwing drags Robin out.
HAWKGIRL
I second Wonders. It's time for
war. Too long have we been stewing
in peace.
Batman looks around, examining the face of every Justice
League member. He notices something going on in Flash's
that makes him curious.
BATMAN
Barry. You do not agree.
FLASH
I'm a pacifist.
GREEN ARROW
(Guffaws.) Yeah, right. That's
code for you're lazy.
FLASH
Well yeah. And also...I don't want
the world getting destroyed. Not
yet. I just got my driver's
license last week. There are just
so many things on my bucket list
to do . Climb Everest. Backpack
through Europe. Eat baklava. How
am I supposed to do that if
Darkseid invades? Iris and I are
due for our second honeymoon next
month! And I wanna have babies
with her, and settle down, and
like...have a life! Get old, you
know, together and all...
GREEN LANTERN
Booooo-riiiiing. I agree with Hawk
lady. I'm tired of the fucking
stew. There's literally no action
Oa side, it's almost like we're
too efficient or something. I'm
just sitting on my ass waiting for
civil war to happen somewhere in
the galaxy to justify my being a
space cop and all, and-
BATMAN
I have never seen a bigger bunch
of selfishness literally anywhere
in my life. Excluding you, Clark.
SUPERMAN
Thank you. But I think selfish is
a bit of a harsh word-
GREEN ARROW
Given who's judging.
Green Arrow, Green Lantern and Hawkgirl break into harsh
laughter. The rest shift in their seats. A few giggles
break out.
CYBORG
Okay. So let's take a vote.
SUPERMAN
On what? What's the issue here?
MARTIAN MANHUNTER
The invasion of Apokolips.
AQUAMAN
Hell no! Seriously! Guys. What
happens to me and my underwater
kingdom when Darkseid comes and
evaporates all the water from
under the seas? What happens to my
beloved Mera and my son? What
happens to my idiot of a brother?
What happens to my exotic mermaid
concubines? What happens to-
GREEN LANTERN
Wait. Seriously. You have mermaid
concubines? Now I'm seriously
jelly. How have you never told us
before? You dog. And wait-like
how-how does it work? You know,
it. Like how do you do it?
BATMAN
Jordan. For once in your life.
Green Lantern's smile just gets bigger.
BLACK CANARY
May I speak?
Everyone quiets down, and looks at her.
BLACK CANARY (cont'd)
There is this thing, which maybe
you've never heard of, but it's
called compromise. Sure we could
take a vote. But then some would
win and some would lose, and the
losing party would be sore, and
then we'd have a "Captain America:
Civil War" kind of scenario on our
hands. Which sucks. For everybody.
GREEN ARROW
I call dibs on Bucky.
GREEN LANTERN
Hell no. I'm made for that role.
FLASH
Bruce obviously gets to be Tony.
GREEN LANTERN
Obviously.
MARTIAN MANHUNTER
Perhaps we should let the canary
finish singing.
BLACK CANARY
Thank you. Now as the voice of
reason in this otherwise would-be
crazyhouse, I take it upon myself
to come up with a scenario that
pleases everybody. And I do mean
I ask for is a
little time to do my research.
CYBORG
How would you do that? By my
computations...
BLACK CANARY
No offense, but fuck your
computations. You're half a
computer and half a person.
Whatever you are, its not..
emotionally competent.
Everybody looks taken aback. Cyborg looks up at Canary, his
one human eye radiating a newfound rage in place of its
earlier objectivity.
CYBORG
Fuck you.
BLACK CANARY
I think I deserve that.
SUPERMAN
Manhunter. Your views.
MARTIAN MANHUNTER
I hate humans.
BATMAN
Be specific, please.
MARTIAN MANHUNTER
I hate most humans.
SUPERMAN
Your views in this context?
MARTIAN MANHUNTER
I side with the Goddess. We are
not made to live ordinary lives.
We are made to hunt, to prey on,
to be the harbingers of conquest
and change. My planet was
destroyed despite the fact that we
never "picked fights" with
anybody. Earth is...but another
planet. Perhaps a jewel of a
planet, but space dust
nonetheless. And one day we must
all return to the stars.
WONDER WOMAN
Hear, hear.
BATMAN
Canary, you have twenty-four hours
to come up with a solution that
pleases everybody. Diana, cool
down for a while. You'll get your
war soon enough.
FLASH
Hey! We never asked Supes what he
thought! War or peace, Supes?
Expansion or...stew?
Superman wiggles uncomfortably in his chair. The rest of
the League looks at him expectantly.
SUPERMAN
I'm neutral in this. I really..
don't have anything to say.
GREEN LANTERN
C'mon, Supes! You gotta take a
side.
SUPERMAN
(looking
apprehensive)
No, I don't. I have things to lose
either way. People to lose. All of
you. Friends. Whatever wall you're
heading towards, it could...it
could crumble you to dust. All I
can say is...war sucks. Krypton
exploded because it chose ambition
over survival. So I choose
survival. Rao help us, I choose..
to live.
BATMAN
Because you have a family.
SUPERMAN
So do you, Bruce.
WONDER WOMAN
And what if war doesn't give you a
choice? What if it forces your
hand? Darkseid is coming for
revenge. That much is certain.
What is unclear is...who should
make the first move. I advocate it
be us. But I stand by this League.
Whatever decision we make as a
team, I am certain it will be
wiser than that of any one of us
alone.
Green Lantern claps sarcastically. Batman looks with a bit
of admiration at Wonder Woman.
BATMAN
So we are agreed. Dinah will come
up with...a solution that pleases
us all. We will reconvene
tomorrow.
Green Lantern yawns, and farts loudly. Green Arrow smirks,
then farts even louder.
GREEN LANTERN
Aw, c'mon. You always gotta one up
me.
BATMAN
Meeting dismissed.
EXT. DESERT - DAY
SOMEWHERE IN LIBYA (SUBTITLE)
Scorching sands spread out in all directions. Pitched tents
are arranged around an oasis. Children run around in all
directions, barefoot and clad in thawbs and cloth turbans,
speaking a mumbo-jumbo of Arabic. There is an electric
fence around the vast encampment.
An convoy of jeeps stops outside the electric fence. Men in
machine guns and turbans, with their faces masked from the
heat, speaking a harsh, guttural language. They immediately
begin to cut the fences and rush into the encampment,
spraying the air with bullets. Women and children scream,
many of them falling. From out of the tents pour ninjas,
hundreds of them, who begin to engage the armed militants.
The armed men are using machine guns while the ninjas use
simple swords, however the latter are quickly gaining over
the former due to their discipline. The militants begin to
scatter, while the ninjas advance and begin to decapitate
the men in jeeps. Many of them retreat in confusion.
Suddenly a black standard appears in the air, for just a
second. It is thrown into the face of a ninja, who picks it
up from the sand and turns it over. The symbol on it is
red, and forms the shape of a bat.
The men retreat in the jeeps, throwing curses over their
shoulders and holding up their middle fingers. One of them
shouts in English
MILITANT:
and he gonna come and fuck you in
the ass motherfuckers!
CUT TO:
INT. A SHADED ROOM - DAY
Ra's al Ghul stands, looking impressive in his long white
beard and robe of green samite. Next to him stands a tall
brunette woman wearing a scabbard. She has an open bleeding
cut across her face.
RA'S AL GHUL
How did he find us?
A man sits strapped to a chair. He spits out blood, and a
tooth, and shakes his head, and grimaces.
TALIA AL GHUL
Father, it is useless to ask this
one such questions.
RA'S AL GHUL
He finds us everywhere. And then,
coward that he is, he sends paid
minions to do his bidding, instead
of coming himself.
Ra's al Ghul raises a hammer. The man starts shaking,
trying to release himself from his bindings. The hammer
comes down with a smash, breaking all the man's fingers.
The man screams.
TALIA AL GHUL
Father, do not do this.
RA'S AL GHUL
Beloved daughter. Do not teach me
how to interrogate.
TALIA AL GHUL
Father, do not stoop as low as our
enemy. This one probably has
wives, and children. He was paid
money to do a job. He knows
nothing more.
Ra's al Ghul drops the hammer onto the ground, and storms
out. Talia follows him, and kneels.
TALIA AL GHUL (cont'd)
What does the Head of the Demon
command?
RA'S AL GHUL
Bring me his head.
Talia al Ghul looks up. Her face is gloomy.
TALIA AL GHUL
Must it be me, father? The man was
once my lover. I have a son by
him.
RA'S AL GHUL
Had. Damian is your son no more.
Go to Gotham in order to please
your father, and prove your
loyalty to the house of Al Ghul.
Erase the seed of the Bat, and the
filth of his stench over that
wretched city. Kill each and every
one who bears his sigil on their
chest. Leave no trace of him. And
beware of his friends. For he has
a strange hold over people.
EXT. OVERHEAD SHOT GOTHAM CITY- DAY
RA'S AL GHUL (O.S.)
A strange, strange hold.
MONTAGE
A fat man with glasses sits in a cafe in front of his
laptop, wearing a shirt with the bat symbol. A street busy
with people, two people wearing the bat symbol pass each
other, touching momentarily, the symbols overlapping. A
cheerleader is tossed up by her squad, who wears the bat
symbol on her tank top.
EXT. A ROOF - DAY
Damian looks pensively into the distance. Behind him Jon
rests in civilian clothes, wearing a Superman t-shirt.
DAMIAN
You do realize, Jon, the severity
of our predicament?
JON
You do realize, Damian, that our
dads don't give a shit?
DAMIAN
Do you realize that our mothers
do? I-I mean, your mother.
Damian looks stricken, then quickly shakes his expression
off.
JON
(suddenly
panicky)
Yeah, Lois is a bitch.
DAMIAN
While that may be objectively
true, that is no way to talk about
your mother.
JON
You call your mother a bitch all
the damn time!
DAMIAN
My mother left me to freeze and
bake in the Arctic and the Sahara!
She broke my bones to acclimate me
to pain. She brainwashed me from
my childhood to kill my father!
All your mother does is nag you
about your book reports and set an
unreasonable curfew of eight o'
clock.
JON
(hyperventilating
That still doesn't change the fact
that she's gonna kill me tonight
after she finds out.
DAMIAN
It was an accident!
JON
That word doesn't exist in her
vocabulary.
DAMIAN
You can blame me.
JON
And put you in hot water with her?
No way man. She's never gonna let
us hang out together after today!
She already calls you a bad
influence.
DAMIAN
Well, fuck.
Below the building, three cars have crashed into each
other. All the people in the crash are dead. Blood is
splattered on the windshields, and people hang like limp
dolls over the steering wheels. Damian and Jon continue to
contemplate the crash from above with philosophical
calmness.
DAMIAN (cont'd)
If only your mother did not own
the rarest car on Earth.
JON
If only she was, like, Santa, or
Father Christmas.
DAMIAN
Maybe you can preach to her the
Christian virtue of forgiveness
and turning the other cheek.
JON
Oh, she believes in turning the
other cheek all right. She does it
all the time. Turning the cheeks
of her enemies. And my dad's
sometimes. You know, like, butt
cheeks?
DAMIAN
Do not get weird.
JON
That's it. I guess-it's time to
call your brothers. The mean one.
And the other one, who does the
flips.
Damian reaches into his jacket pocket, and pulls his phone
out. He grimaces, then begins dialing.
DAMIAN
Are you willing to do whatever it
takes?
JON
(resigned)
Yeah.
DAMIAN
What if they ask us to blow them?
Jon's eyes go wide, and he gulps. Then he stumbles backward
a step.
JON
They wouldn't, would they?
DAMIAN
(nonchalant)
Anything's possible.
EXT. THE KENTS' GARAGE - SUNSET
Dick and Jason push a 1960 Aston Martin into the garage.
Damian and Jon hang around wringing their hands, but they
look relieved.
Dick turns around with a wide smile on his face, and
ruffles Jon's hair. Jon looks up at him nervously, and
smiles.
JON
There's no way my mother could
find out, right?
DICK
Absolutely.
JON
You mean...absolutely not?
DICK
Kid, your mother has one of the
sharpest investigative minds in
the world. I'd give it thirty
seconds.
Jon groans, and crumples to the ground. He looks on the
verge of tears. Jason comes out of the garage wiping his
hands on an oilcloth. He looks down at the depressed Jon,
and frowns.
JASON
Kid, this ain't the end of the
world.
DAMIAN
(deadpan)
You can always run away.
JASON
Not a bad idea. Solved all my
problems.
JON
But-bu-bu-but you don't
understand! I can't-I lu-lu-love
her too much-
Jon starts sobbing uncontrollably. He rolls into a ball and
starts shivering on the floor of the garage.
JON (cont'd)
And we ki-ki-killed. Like...so
many people.
DAMIAN
(deadpan)
Only five.
JON
O-o-one of them was a little gu-gu
girl.
Dick leans down and picks up the sobbing Jon. He wraps him
protectively in his arms, and sits down on the floor, his
legs extended. He starts rocking back-and-forth, and
humming.
JASON
Look, kid. To them you're just an
alien.
DICK
A freak.
JASON
They'd have killed you if they
could. Don't you see the news?
DICK
Even the little girl.
(he makes a moue)
JASON
Especially the little girl.
DICK
Look, kid. When the world turns
its back on you, you turn your
back on the world.
JON
(smiling a
little)
Well, that's not what I was
taught.
DICK
Then maybe you need a new lesson.
Repeat after me.
DICK AND JASON
(singing)
Hakuna Matata...
DAMIAN AND JON
(singing)
What a wonderful phrase...
ALL OF THEM
(chorus)
Hakuna Matata
Ain't no passing craze
It means no worries
For the rest of your days
it's our problem-free
Philosophy
Hakuna Matata
INT. THE CLOCKTOWER - NIGHT
Barbara sits in a wheelchair, peering at several flat
screen computers through her glasses. The screens show a
running display of green code over a black screen. Barbara
presses a few keys on her keyboard. All of a sudden, the
Joker shows on one of the screens, seen from the P.O.V. of
a ceiling camera, hard at work leaning over a blueprint
which he is drawing. Barbara smiles.
BARBARA
Gotcha.
Her phone rings. Barbara leans over and picks it up.
JIM GORDON
Babs?
BARBARA
Yeah, dad.
JIM
Gonna be home tonight, sweetheart?
Daddy's cooking.
BARBARA
(smiling)
Absolutely.
INT./EXT. THE BATMOBILE - NIGHT
BATMAN
Here, Tim.
He hands Red Robin a milkshake. Red Robin looks into the
cup, then up at Batman.
RED ROBIN
Thanks.
Red Robin takes a sip, then smiles.
RED ROBIN (cont'd)
Didn't know you liked strawberry
milkshake.
BATMAN
What?
RED ROBIN
Somebody drank some from this
before me.
BATMAN
It spilled.
RED ROBIN
Uh-huh.
BATMAN
It was a dog, okay? It came out of
nowhere.
Red Robin smiles. Batman revs the engine, a scowl on his
face.
BATMAN (cont'd)
Liked you better before you were
such a smart-ass.
RED ROBIN
I was always a smart-ass.
The Batmobile pulls onto the highway and drives away as
people look on in horror. After it give chase six cop cars,
their sirens and red lights on.
BATMAN (V.O.)
As I look down at my city, I feel
something strange for her.
Something like the deepest
affection mixed with the deepest
exasperation. The way you feel for
a favorite dog, who slobbers all
over you, but who you still love
to death. This city still needs
me. I am her love, her heart, her
soul. She realizes that, dimly,
but plays hard to get.
I like that.
EXT. CRIME ALLEY - NIGHT
Thomas and Martha Wayne walk down the alley with Bruce. A
shadow emerges from the darkness. As it emerges, it takes
the shape of Batman
BATMAN
Hello.
BRUCE
I've been waiting for you.
Batman pulls out a gun and shoots Thomas and Martha. Bruce
smiles.
BATMAN
Come to daddy.
Bruce runs towards Batman, who envelops him in his cape.
BATMAN (cont'd)
I am all your tears, all your
sadness, all your rage, all your
fear. You are hope, and light, and
goodness.
BRUCE
Yes.
Batman points the gun at Bruce.
BATMAN
Unfortunately, that means you have
to go.
BRUCE
I don't understand-
Batman shoots Bruce. Bruce falls in slow motion, surrounded
by his mother's pearls. A tear falls from Batman's eyes.
BATMAN
I truly am sorry.