Burns, Baby Burns Disco infernooooo! The Simpsons are going on a trip to a cider farm and so is Edna and Seymour but he cancels it at the last moment because his overbearing mother insists on coming.
Then Rodney Dangerfield guest stars as a man named Larry who thinks he is Mr Burns' son!
Plot
In fourth grade class, Mrs Krabappel is setting the holiday homework. An essay on something. It's clear she's going on a date with Skinner as soon as school is dismissed as she's dressed up.
Milhouse is so excited by them breaking up that he dances and has to be squirted with a fire extinguisher to calm him down. He is covered in foam.
"Can it be typed up?" Martin ruins things by insisting that the essay be typed only.
Kid with pink shades glares at him.
"Sure why not?" said Krabappel. "It will be a lot more easier on my eyes that having to read everyone's handwriting!"
Martin had been badly beaten up and given a wedgie. However he was still in an annoying mood. "Can it be at least ten pages?"
Boy with pink shades glares at him even more.
"Ha! Why not? I was gonna only ask for four!" said Edna. "Martin?"
Martin had mysteriously vanished and Nelson was dusting his hands by an open window. "He's gone now Mrs Krabappel..."
Boy with pink shades looked shocked by whatever Nelson had done to Martin.
Cafeteria, lunch time.
"Lunch time..." said seemingly invincible giant monster Nelson from season one.
Bart grimaced.
"But not invincible to a fully charged KA ME HA ME HA!" Oscar fires a Kamehameha beam from his palms at the giant deep voiced monster Nelson.
"Oooooow!" Giant monster Nelson cried. "You just blasted a hole in me!"
"Look at me! I'm cheese!" Ralph was covered in molten cheese.
Bart's nose ran because he was baffled by what he saw.
Ralph covered in cheese ran around the cafeteria.
"Ow! The cheese is burning me!" He whined.
...
In Skinner's office Edna was waiting for him to take her apple picking but unfortunately he had some bad news. Skinner's mother Agnes had invited herself and Skinner was too much of a momma's boy to say no to her.
"Seymour this was a supposed to be a romantic day out apple picking! You're such a momma's boy!" Edna ranted.
"Now I resent that remark! I'm my own man!" said Skinner.
"Seymour! Put on your sailor costume!" yelled Agnes.
"Mother..." Skinner whined. "Anyway, I've brought some apples from the store."
"Seymour this wasn't about the apples!" Edna sighed.
"Then why did you want us to go apple picking then?" Skinner asked.
"Seymour! Let's go home! Man without a Face is on!" said Agnes.
"Yes mother." Seymour complied.
"You're such a momma's boy!" Edna repeated herself upset.
"I am not!" Skinner whined.
Edna zapped him with her magic wand from the Barry Trotter episodes. He was turned into a baby and floating because of magic. "Now you are."
Baby Seymour messed his diaper.
"Hey! You made me make a poopy!" He whined.
School yard.
"I like monkeys!" said Ralph. Bart was about to speak. "However my leprechaun keeps wanting me to burn them..."
Bart felt very unnerved.
"Must, resist, stupidity urge!" Oscar was getting hyperactive or silly.
Hugo grimaced.
...
The Simpsons had booked a trip to a cider farm. It was a tight squeeze in Homer's car because Grampa and Hugo were with them.
However the trip turned sour because the Flanderses were there!
"Hi diddly ho neighorinos!" Ned greeted, warmly. The Flanderses were wearing stupid apple hats.
"D'oooooh!" Homer groaned. "Right that's it! Everyone back in the car!"
"Homer!" Marge scolded him. "I'm sorry Ned. Homer's in one of his moods again."
"I'm not in a mood! I don't like Flanders! And neither does Bart's weirdo friend!" said Homer hugging Oscar. Oscar glared at him for calling him weird.
"Between you and me, Marge," Homer muttered quietly. "Bart's ugly twin brother is at home, back in the attic where he belongs! Don't you worry, that freak of nature has more than enough fish heads for at least a week!"
"Or is he?" Oscar grinned from behind and revealed Hugo.
The Simpsons and the Flanderses sighed.
They split up to do activities.
Lisa noticed obviously it was Autumn or Fall, because leaves were turning red and other fantastic colours and falling about. Tombi ran through the autumn leaves stirring up leaf butterflies with leaves for wings.
"Ahhhh! What a perfect outing on such a beautiful autumn day..." Lisa sighed admiring the leaves falling.
"Aaaaaaagh! Lisa's speaking Limey!" Bart screamed. Oscar glared at him.
"Ugh... I mean... what a perfect outing on such a beautiful Fall day..." Lisa sighed.
"Ugh... script writers..." Oscar sighed, "Can't even research the local dialect properly. Yes it it is a rather pleasant Autumn day, guvnor! It's just loverly!" Oscar exaggerated his British accent into cockney.
"Yeah, but I feel sorry for all those cooped up inside watching the seven game of the World Series!" said Homer yelling annoyed.
"Yeah well they won't learn anything about apples today." said Marge,
Homer seethed.
"Homer! You selfish, ungrateful! Do you want to spend all day indoors then watching some ridiculous football game?!" Marge snapped.
"It's not ridiculous! It's the seventh World Series!" Homer snapped.
"Fine... everyone in the car... Family Outing is cancelled..." Marge sighed.
The kids whine and gripe at Dad as they go back to the car.
"Honestly son!" Grampa sighed.
"Shut up Dad..." Homer groaned as they squeezed into the car and drove back home. Luckily for Homer Bret was still commentating on the pregame festivities and crowd members doing crazy things like drinking paint...
His family sighed annoyed he'd rather spend the day watching sports.
...
The next available day there wasn't a football game on...
The Simpsons arrived along with their neighbours the Flanders. Who thought it would be a great idea to wear silly apple shaped hats. Everyone except Homer, Bart, Oscar and Hugo wore a silly red apple hat.
"I'm not wearing an apple hat..." said Oscar.
"Why not?" Lisa asked wearing a shiny red apple hat.
"Because Banana Man thinks you're Apple Man's evil henchmen! Oh sweet Blighty comics..." Oscar was reading a Banana Man Comic.
Bart sighed.
"Let's find our own things to do..." said Marge as they split up to do their own thing.
Abe took the boys to learn about the boring history of the place.
"This place was attended to by our forefathers until World War II broke out and they had to go off and fight the Japanese. When they returned the place was infested with rats." said the tour guide.
"Eeeeeeeeew!" Everyone except Hugo groaned.
"Coooooool!" said Hugo.
"Yeah we get it... you like rats, Ratboy..." Bart groaned.
Marge, Lisa, Maggie and Maude went apple picking. Skinner was there too with Edna and Agnes bickering.
Meanwhile Homer stayed with Ned while he explained the difference between apple juice and cider. As well as for watching out for Canadian apple juice and cider which are the other way round.
He was jabbering on...
"You stay if you want to. I'm outta here!" said Homer's brain. It floated away.
Homer was now an empty shell and promptly fainted.
"Oh my! Homer?! Is there a doctor here?" Ned gasped.
"Ned it's my day off!" Dr Hibbert said in a cross tone. That's ex Dr Hibbert! He got sacked for what he did to Hugo remember?
Marge and Lisa were apple picking still. Marge decided to wear a stupid apple hat.
"Look at all the foil-lage." said Marge mispronouncing Foliage.
"Mom. It's foliage. Foliage." said Lisa.
"That's what I said! Foilage! It doesn't take a nucular scientist to explain how to pronounce Foilage!" said Marge stubbornly.
Lisa sighed.
...
Meanwhile Rodney Dangerfield as Larry, a man selling second hand merchandise at the train station was bothering people on the train to buy wonky Pepsi bottles and other knick knacks. However he sees Mr Burns sitting boarded in his private train car because something was blocking the track. In a startling revaluation he believes Mr Burns to be his father. It's stupid I know...
That something was Homer's couch...
"There appears to be an abandoned couch on the line."
"Oh... I suppose I'll have to go on about how I felt Harvard was cheating at that game because as a lonely billionaire owner of a nuclear power plant, America's finest universities and their hijinks affect me somehow. I always loved Yale because apparently I went there." said Mr Burns.
"I always thought Yale made door keys sir." said Smithers. A studio audience laughs.
"Oh I remember my Roomys... Big Sally and the gang... Lord Haw Haw..." said Mr Burns.
"Hello there Burnsie! Ah., it's your old roomy! Dink!" said Mr Dink from Doug. Oh shit!
"Smithers this is is a private carriage! Get this purple oaf out of here!" Mr Burns ranted.
Smithers sighed and removed Mr Dink from the carriage. "Mr Burns isn't in the mood for old friends right now Dink..." said Mr Smithers.
Larry was outside the train offering more crazy and dumb souvenirs like googily eyed walnuts, googily eyed rocks, squash candy. Mmmmmmm... squash candy...
Larry gasped when he saw Mr Burns. And compared him to an old photo he had of him.
In the private carriage.
"Smithers, I am bored, get drunk and make an ass of yourself for my amusement!" said Mr Burns.
"Yes sir!" said Mr Smithers, he got drunk and danced about. "I'm a one man conga March! Why you... I never liked you and your damn principles! Oooooooh eeeerrrrr..."
Mr Burns chuckled at Smithers's antics.
Larry needed for some reason to find him again as his train finally left the station after the couch was removed from the tracks.
"Hey Casey Jones! Where is this train heading to?" Larry asked the driver.
The driver of the train turned out to actually be Casey Jones from Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles!
"No Author!" Bart groaned in a comic panel.
"Springfield!" snarled the crazy hockey mask wearing mad man.
"Oh... Which one?" There's at least five in the whole of America.
"I don't knooooooow!" said Casey Jones from Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles driving the train as it left.
"Cowabungaaaaaaa!" yelled Michelangelo.
"Author that was a Grateful Dead reference!" Homer yelled.
How can the dead be grateful?! Being dead sucks!
"Actually Dad, the script writers probably were referring to Casey Jones, a nineteenth century train engineer who died heroically in a train crash." said Lisa.
Oscar Sung Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles with his fingers in his ears,
...
At the cider farm the boys, that's Bart, Hugo, Oscar, Rod and Todd, were playing William Tell...
Bart had somehow tied Todd to a tree and put a red apple on his head. He was using him as target practice for his sling shot.
"Todd stop squirming! I almost have a shot at that apple on your head.
"Please help me Lord!" Todd prayed.
Elsewhere Marge was at the gift shop and brought an apple pie. Homer was near by trying some cider like it was a fancy wine.
"Hmmmm. Very citric and strong with just a hint of cinnamon." said Homer strangely not downing pints of the stuff.
"Oh Homer, we're at a cider farm and you're not embarrassing me by drinking. I'm so proud!" said Marge joyfully.
"Agh! I knew there was something I was missing out on!" Homer screamed and ran off to a makeshift bar on the farm that was selling home made cider.
Marge sighed as he was obviously intending to drink in there.
Plot 2
Eventually it was time for everyone to go home. Marge had to drive because Homer was extremely drunk. He was wading about inebriated while singing something in slurred words.
Marge sighed as he got in the car.
"Now who's got the apple pie?" Marge asked as they checked they had everything and everyone.
"Ooooooh!" Grampa groaned.
"Abe are you sitting on the pie?" Marge asked.
"I hope so..." Grampa groaned.
The kids suddenly all shuffle away from him. (Like they did in Treehouse of Horror III when he wet himself.)
Eventually they come across a hitchhiker. Larry.
"Oh! A hitchhiker! Let's offer him a ride!" said Homer.
"Homer! There's no more room in the car and we're not picking up strangers!" Marge nagged.
"Aw but he looks like Rodney Dangerfield!" Homer groaned.
A few moments later.
"I can't believe we're taking a hitchhiker home..." Marge sighed as somehow Homer got his own way. Everyone was squashed up to make room for the hitchhiker.
"Hey, you guys ain't so bad! Whoa! This is some sweet ride!" said Larry.
"Mom, I don't think Grampa sat on the pie..." Bart groaned from the squashes pile of kids, Grampa and Larry.
Marge sighed.
"Aaaaagh! My spine! Who's crushing me?!" Oscar cried.
"Quiet porcupine head! I think my dad messed his pants..." said Homer.
"I hope not!" Bart cried.
"Can't breath..." Lisa groaned.
...
The Simpsons and Larry arrived home. The kids were too busy putting their necks back in place from being crushed in Homer's car and Marge had to hastily take Grampa inside.
"Hi diddly ho neighborinos! Wasn't that a swell trip?" said Ned.
"Can't talk, hungover..." Homer groaned as he stumbled indoors held upright by Larry.
"Whoa, someone's been packing a few beers tonight!" said Larry as he took Homer inside.
Everyone was in the living room.
"I uh have to change Grampa's diaper. You lot keep our guest company and make sure your dad doesn't eat the apple pie!" said Marge.
"Dangnabbit woman! It's not a diaper!" Grampa ranted as she took him upstairs.
"Eeeeew!" Groaned the kids. They protected the pie as Homer eyed it hungrily.
"No pie for you, Homeboy!" said Bart holding the pie.
"Call me Dad!" Homer yelled.
"Homer..." said Bart defiantly.
"Daddy..." said Hugo correcting him.
"Homer..."
"Daddy..."
"Homer..."
"Daddy..."
"Homer..."
Lisa sighed.
Wiggum house.
Chief Wiggum was watching Jeopardy.
"Hank your answer in the form of a question is What is-"
"Flaming Pudding!" Ralph yelled.
Wiggum was concerned for his son and his random nonsense.
...
After Marge came downstairs after changing Grampa's diaper and giving him a bath. The family were enjoying their new guest.
"Hey! That's one rad hairdo!" said Larry. "Nah I'm just messing with you. How about a hand to your ma kids?"
The kids chatted and cheered.
Marge sighed at remarks about her hair.
Bart laughed. "In all seriousness I'd love to have hair like yours Mom. I just can't grow a perm..."
"Larry why are you here? Don't you have a home to go to?" Marge asked.
"I wish! My wife got everything in our divorce!" said Larry. "The truth is I'm looking for this guy." He had a photo of Mr Burns.
"That's Mr Burns, my boss!" said Homer.
"He's also incredibly evil!" said Lisa. "Why do you want to see him?"
"Because he's my pop!" said Larry.
The Simpsons gasped.
"Dun! Dun! Duuuuuuun!" Oscar made an annoying stinger/dramatic moment sound. Like Belt the the Sloth from the Crood does. Except that still doesn't exist yet...
Bart clonked him on the head annoyed at him.
"Ow!"
A scene transition later.
"So my old man is really that bad?" Larry asked.
"Of course! He ran me over with his car!" Bart blurted out. "He tried to out the sun!"
"He pollutes the environment!" Lisa explained. "He tried to steal the oil from underneath our school!"
"He stole Maggie's teddy bear!" said Marge before pausing. "Oh wait that was his teddy bear, never mind."
"He forced grandma to go on the run from the law over his germ lab!" Lisa added.
"He can't remember my name!" Homer added.
"He sexually harassed me!" said Marge.
"He tried to kill me and my grandson!" said Grampa.
"Besides Mr Burns doesn't like visitors..." Bart pointed out.
...
Homer took Larry to see Mr Burns anyway as he still wanted to see his dad regardless. They snuck into his mansion grounds.
"Whoa! This fellow has more dough than a prison meatloaf!" said Larry.
Homer rings the doorbell.
Mr Burns answers. "How dare you interrupt me from my lime Ricky! I demand to know why you're here!" He was drinking a cocktail.
"Well, um.. geese this is hard! Where do I start..." Larry stuttered.
"Out with it! What is it? Save the whales? A dying relative? Answer me before I release the hounds!" Mr Burns yelled.
"Mr Burns, I'm your son!" said Larry.
Mr Burns gasped.
"And I think I've stepped on one of your peacocks. Have you got a towel?" Larry asked with smooshed peacock on his shoe.
Somehow he was in a good enough mood to actually let Homer and Larry in. He examined Larry. He had three spots on his head...
"The Burns family dimples! It's true! You really are my son!" said Mr Burns. "But which one of my many girlfriends is your mother? Beatrice? The queen of Spain? Millicent?"
"I don't know! I don't even think Mom even spoke of you.
"Oh I know of Charles!" said a elderly crone.
"Mom?!" Larry asked.
"Larry, what are you doing in town?" asked an upper class old lady.
"That's your mom?" Homer asked.
"Who is this ghastly man?" asked Larry's mom.
"Well isn't this a happy family reunion..." Burns sighed. "Hello Eunice... How are you doing..."
"Charles you left me to raise our boy single handedly! ... And then I had him sent away to boarding school... Oh you don't understand! Larry can be so boorish and embarrassing!" said Larry's mother.
"Mom please!" Larry blushed.
"Um, I have to go home now..." said Homer embarrassed.
...
"Well Larry, this is your room." said Mr Burns showing Larry his room.
"Wow... swanky..." said Larry.
"Well, goodnight Larry." said Mr Burns.
"Wait Pops! How did you meet Mom?" Larry asked.
Mr Burns sighed.
"Oh how I have told myself this story a thousand times Larry... It was 1941, I met this upperclass dame, sure she had far too many wrinkles and her hair was going grey but she was a woman! Then there was her 21 year old daughter, Eunice, your mother." Burns explained. "We courted in a crematorium and made love to Clark Gable's shocking use of the word Damn." why you would shag in a crematorium I don't know! "Then one night... at the Peabody museum..."
A museum owned by Mr Peabody!
"No author!" Bart groaned.
"Quiet you!" Mr Peabody yelled.
"We made love again. Under the watchful eyes of four stuffed Eskimos and a woolly mammoth." said Mr Burns.
"Wow! So I've been in a museum!" said Larry.
"Well goodnight Larry." said Mr Burns.
Mr Burns relaxed for the night and poured himself a lime Ricky cocktail. Whatever that is.
However Oscar was being very annoying and stole a tin of caviar.
"Give that back you loathsome urchin!" Mr Burns chased him.
"Your venomous ways will one day come back to bite you." Oscar yelled as he ran about the mansion.
"Oh I've heard them all! The false cries of morality and virtue! Now give that tin back, now!"
"No!" said Oscar.
Mr Burns seethed.
...
At the Simpsons house. Mr Burns turned up.
"Mr Burns... why are you here...?" Marge sighed as the Simpsons started to really hate him by now.
"Where's that irksome brat Oscar?" Mr Burns asked annoyed.
"Oscar what did you do now..." Marge sighed.
"I stole a tin of caviar from Mr Burns..." said Oscar. He was holding a small tin of caviar.
"Oz give Mr Burns back his caviar..." Lisa sighed.
Oscar sighed in defeat and gave Mr Burns the tin of caviar.
Mr Burns left.
The Simpsons were annoyed by Oscar's antics.
"Oscar... just find something to do..." Marge sighed.
"Okay!" said Oscar.
The landing.
"Dear diary. I fear the hunt!" said Shippo from Inuyasha writing in his personal diary.
"Dear diary. I love the hunt! Cheerio! Vulpine ahead old bean!" said Oscar aloud to himself while writing in his own diary. He then tore off his clothes to reveal he was wearing redcoat posh hunting gear and jodhpurs and hopped on a horse and chased Shippo down the hall way.
Shippo fled yelling.
"Stop this barbarism!" Lisa got in the way.
"How dare you! Uncouth Yank! Blighty is a proud nation of fox hunters!" Oscar yelled.
Bart stepped in to defend his little sister.
"Bart your people shoot bears while wearing checkered lumberjack shirts and furry hats." said Oscar.
"Oz stop stereotyping! Not every Limey is a tea sipping fox hunter! And not every Yank is a southern hick bear hunter!" Bart groaned.
"Okay I admit it. I'm not wealthy enough to take part in country sports with the lord of my borough. He won't even acknowledge me!" said Oscar.
"Well our huntsmen are rugged and manly! Your fox hunters are sissies..." Bart smirked.
Plot 3
Mr Burns tried to get Larry used to living as an upper class gentleman but he was rude about a lady friend of Mr Burns and her daughter.
"You must meet my daughter the debutant! She came out last spring!" said a posh guest at Mr Burns's party. She came out about her sexuality.
"Oh! Put her back in! She's not ready yet!" said Larry in disgust.
The posh lady was angry with Mr Burns.
Mr Burns then tried to introduce Larry to an old war comrade of his. However he teased the old soldier by calling him skipper and cracking about his age.
"Larry, Admiral Stout is very sensitive about his age!" Mr Burns sighed.
Then Larry rudely sat at the buffet table and helped himself to the food. The chef was very cross with him and his bad table manners.
"Give my regards to Mrs Boyadee!" said Larry to the chef gently ribbing him.
Mr Burns was embarrassed.
Elsewhere Ralph was um... being chaotic...
First off he ran out the house naked again... Ned brought him back cheerful as usual.
Then he exasperated Oscar by saying Duff Man was a Jedi Knight.
Oscar gave a bug eyed look.
"Uh..." Bart was baffled.
Iron Butterfly, who sang Inna Gadda Davedda (In the Garden of Eden) we're now Iron Butterfinger.
"No one lays a finger on my Butterfinger." said Bart doing his slogan and taking a Butterfinger bar before Oscar or Ralph could get it.
Bart then saw Screwy Squirrel drinking a Squishee. The cup was way too big for the small squirrel.
"Oh brother... it sure is dull today..." said Screwy. He sniffed to clear his sinuses.
Oscar was obsessing over Screwy's big wet shiny black nose again.
...
At work one morning Homer woke to find Larry Burns assigned to the same station.
Homer screamed and put a puzzle away quickly and turned on his console and got to work.
"Ohohoho! Don't worry about me Homer! I'm so lazy I paid someone to take piano lessons for me!" said Larry.
"Wow that is lazy..." said Homer.
"Uh Huh." said Larry Burns.
"In my life I've been through plenty. when I was three years old, my parents got a dog. I was jealous of the dog, so they got rid of me." said Larry. His voice actor actually said this in a joke while doing stand up.
Homer grimaced.
At home he kept talking about Larry and how he had more things in common with him than Marge. "I'm just saying Marge, if I was trapped on an island with someone it would have to be Larry..."
"I think we've heard enough about Larry for one evening..." said Marge as they ate dinner.
"Well what did you all do today that was exciting then?!" Homer asked.
Bart was examining a diamond with a magnifying eyepiece in his eye like a professional jeweller. Lisa had broken her arm because it was bandaged up and in a sling. And Maggie won cutest baby in a baby pageant.
"Um... okay..." said Homer.
"Well I forgot to water Professor Moriarty's flowers and he went coco in the loco and accused me of murdering the flowers..." said Oscar.
"Okay..." Homer was baffled.
They're eating.
"Well darling, this pie is great!" said Homer eating.
"Why thank you dear." Marge smiled.
"I LIKE PIE!" Teddy yelled with joy.
The Simpsons gawked at him, baffled.
...
One afternoon in his office Mr Burns had asked some college friends to enroll Larry in their colleges. However they had some bad news.
"He spelt Yale with a six!" said a lady college dean.
"And that urchin who stole my caviar?" Mr Burns asked.
"Oscar thought Yale was a company that cuts door keys..." said the female college dean.
"Well they do cut keys! Look! A Yale key!" said Oscar. He was holding a key.
"He made fun of my weight and then suggested I chillax..." said a male college dean.
They explained Larry was too stupid and uncouth for their colleges.
Mr Burns sighed.
Then Larry invited his friend Homer around for dinner.
However there was a frosty atmosphere. Mr Burns was angry with Larry over something. Probably him being an oaf.
"Well, who ever you are. Do you have a son?" Mr Burns asks Homer.
"Why yes. Two actually, but we only wanted one." said Homer with his mouthful.
"And does he cause you embarrassement? Insult your guests?" Mr Burns asked ranting.
"All the time! I'm always strangling the little hell raiser! And the other one is a total fruitcake!" said Homer.
Mr Burns sighed.
"This dinner is over! Get off of my property Simmons!"
"That's Simpson!" Homer yelled.
"Don't take that tone with me! And take this thing with you!" He referred to Larry.
"But Dad! I'm your son!" Larry whined.
"I have no son!" shouted Mr Burns.
...
Homer took Larry to Moe's. His friends were eager to meet Mr Burns's son. They were surprised how nice and down to earth he was.
"Except I'm not Mr Burns's son anymore... My old man kicked me out!" Larry sighed.
"Why that horrible old gargoyle!" said Moe angrily.
Larry sighed.
Lenny and Carl had a weird Would you rather round this evening.
"Would you rather have sex with someone with really bad BO or really bad breath?" Lenny asked.
"Lenny that's just gross..." said Moe.
"Both options I'm uh not really comfortable with..." said Carl.
Homer then took Larry home.
"Homer why is that hitchhiker here..." Marge sighed.
"Marge he's not a hitchhiker he's Mr Burns's son Larry!" said Homer.
"We'll take him back to Mr Burns!" said Marge.
"We can't. Mr Burns doesn't want him anymore... He said he was an embarrassment..." said Homer.
"Why can't he live with his mom?" Marge asked.
Larry's mother appeared. "Hmmmph! As if I want him living with me! Sorry Larry but you're on you own now!" said Larry's mother.
The Simpsons were speechless.
"How did you get in here?!" Oscar yelled.
Then Homer and Larry cooked up a stupid plan involving them kidnapping Larry.
Marge didn't approve of it.
Homer spoke with a kazoo in his mouth to Mr Burns to disguise his voice. Mr Burns thought he wanted a ransom. However for once Homer didn't want money. The principle was putting Larry in pretend danger to force Mr Burns to admit he loved his son.
...
Mr Burns despite kicking his son out was incensed that someone would dare steal from him.
"No one steals from Charles Montgomery Burns! Not even his oafish embarrassing son!" Mr Burns ranted.
A police squad surrounded Homer's house and a news bulletin was read out about Larry's kidnap.
"Oh lord!" Marge gasped as she saw police outside. She went downstairs to the basement. Homer was hiding there with Larry.
"Homer why is there police outside our house and why are you hiding in the basement with Larry?" Marge asked exasperated.
"It's just until Mr Burns takes his son back..." Homer whined.
Marge sighed.
Eventually Chief Wiggum on the news explained that he was considering breaking into the Simpsons house to fetch Larry. However when Marge went to ask Homer to see sense he had vanished with Larry. On the news Homer ran out the house screamed when he was seen and got in his car with Larry and drove off.
"The kidnapper is getting away with Larry!" said Kent.
Marge sighed.
...
At home.
Oscar needed to reference the title and what it was a reference to. Well it's a reference to the song Disco Inferno.
Oscar sang while playing Disco Inferno on his radio.
Bart winced.
Hugo poked Lisa with his sewing needle.
"Ow! That hurt Hugo!" Lisa whined.
"Mwuhahahaha! I know..." Hugo chuckled.
Lisa frowned.
Homer and Larry hid in the Aztec theatre cinema and watched a funny film. However they laughed too hard annoying the only other patron, Hans Moleman.
"If you don't like it, call the cops!" Homer taunted he did...
"We have a location of Homer Simpson and Larry Burns. They are currently holed up in the Aztec theatre cinema!" said Kent as the Simpsons watched the news.
"Oh lord! Homer give yourself up!" Marge sighed.
"No fight your way out!" Bart said with encouragement.
Homer was shown running out of the cinema before being gunned down with machine gun fire.
"Aaaaaaaaaaaghhnhh!" The Simpsons screamed.
"I'd like to tell you this was just a reenactment but this small boy who has just came into the studio and held me at gun point has insisted it is real." said Kent as Oscar held him hostage. "We're sorry Homer Simpson's family if you're watching, but Homer Simpson has sadly passed away in a hail of gunfire."
"Oh homie!" Marge cried.
"Daaaaad!" Bart cried. The Simpsons started crying.
Hugo was happy Homer died.
...
However Homer and Larry were alive and had left through the back when the police had called them to surrender. They got in Homer's car and escaped town.
They came to a haunted house.
"I don't know Homer that house gives me the creeps!" said Larry.
"Larry it's just a dumb old house. There's nothing to be afraid of..." said Homer.
However the house was indeed haunted. The phantasm haunting it was quite similar to the one from Treehouse of Horror except Homer and Larry stick around.
The spirit of the house makes the walls bleed and electrical appliances attack Homer.
"Hey look Homer! There's a vortex in the kitchen wall!" said Larry.
Homer threw an orange into it. The orange vanished. Then a scrunched up note came back and hit Homer. He read it. The note read. "Quit throwing your junk into our universe!"
Then there was a knock at the door. Homer answered it to find it was his family.
"Marge! Kids?!" Homer hugged them.
"We knew you weren't really dead Homer." said Bart. "Oscar was in on your plan, it was just a reenactment! But the entire town does think you're dead!"
"Woohoo! Now I can start a new life in this house with our friend Larry..." said Homer.
The Simpsons sighed.
"Get out!" said the house.
"Make us!" said Bart.
The electrical appliances strangled Bart.
"Oh lord!" Marge gasped.
Homer rescued Bart from the appliances.
The walls started bleeding again and the house said horrible gory things would happen to them.
"Just ignore the spooky voice, he'll get bored." said Homer.
Plot 4
The Simpsons were having dinner in the kitchen.
"Dad, why is there a vortex in the wall..." Lisa asked.
"I dunno. Just don't throw stuff in there, the other universe doesn't like it." said Homer.
"Get oooooouuuut!" The house wanted them to leave.
"Shut up! Stupid haunted house!" Homer snapped.
They ate their food.
Hugo grinned deviously and poked Bart with his sewing needle.
"Ow!" Bart yelled.
Hugo laughed.
"Hugo stop poking people with that sharp needle." Marge told him off.
The Simpsons sat bored because they didn't have a TV in the haunted mansion.
Bart was um being Bart.
"Well you are a looooooser!"
"Only loser here is you Bart, drop out boy..." said Lisa.
"I know you are, but what am I?" said Bart.
"A loser." said Lisa.
"I know you are, but what am I?" said Bart.
"A loser."
"I know you are, but what am I?"
"Don't you have to be stupid somewhere else..." Hugo cut in as he glared at Bart while reading a Jules Verne Book.
It soon got late and everyone retreated to bed.
The kids yawned as they went upstairs.
...
While Homer groomed himself at the bathroom mirror Larry pranked him with help from Clint Eastwood, Mel Gibson and the Crypt Keeper. Homer was astonished by his reflection changing into Clint Eastwood.
"I'm gonna kill ya. Your momma and all her bridge playing friends!" said Clint Eastwood.
Then the reflection became Larry.
"Hi Larry!" said Homer.
"Hey Homer! Boy, you think you have it rough! I had another face underneath all this!" said Larry.
Then Larry became Mel Gibson. When he was still attractive and not a racist.
Young Mel was admiring himself in the mirror.
"Ooooooooh! I am handsome!" said Homer.
Then he was horrified as his reflection became the Crypt Keeper from The Crypt keeper TV series.
The Crypt Keeper screamed like Kevin from Home Alone and slapped his own cheeks.
Homer screamed and fled the bathroom.
Larry Burns was talking to Marge and the kids and generally acting like Rodney Dangerfield.
Homer ran past screaming.
The kids grimaced exasperated.
Hugo grinned staring at his needle. He poked Larry with it.
"Ow!"
However the house hypnotised everyone into killing each other. They got up in the night collecting the weapons the hose offered them. Homer got an ax, Lisa got a carving knife and Bart got a butcher's cleaver.
However Marge was unaffected and so was Larry because he slept like a log. Marge came in with sandwiches to find the family trying to kill each other.
"Right that's it! We're all going Home and Larry's going back to Mr Burns! Or who ever will have him!" Marge yelled.
Luckily the police hunt had been called off because everyone believed Homer to be dead and Mr Burns took Larry back.
"Oh I'm sorry I said those things my boy! Welcome home!" said Mr Burns as he hugged Larry.
"Oh shucks Dad, you're making me cry!" said Larry.
The end!