"...and I think we ought to restrict all this nonsense between the girls and boys. School should be a place of study and education—"
.- -. -.. / -... .-. .- .. -. .- .- ... ... .. -. -. and brainwashing. The soft tattoo of a quill nib against the wooden staff table could be heard, a background track to Delores Umbridge's tirade. It seemed to come from the direction of Minerva McGonagall, who sat stiffly upright, lips pressed tightly together and nostrils flaring, eyes blazing as she looked at the High Inquisitor. The pink problem raised her voice over it, finishing her declaration that there would be a new Education Decree: Number 26, which would forbid girls and boys to be within six inches of each other.
.. / -.-. .- -. - / -... . .-.. .. . ...- . / - ... . / ... .- -. / -... .- -. -. . -.. / ... . - . .-. - ... . -..- ..- .- .-.. .. - -.- I can't believe the hag banned heterosexuality. This time the tapping came from Severus Snape, hitting his quill against the book on his lap, a rather thick volume of obscure and complex potions. He was in the habit of bringing something to read in order to stave of the sheer boredom during staff meetings, especially since Umbridge made her appearance.
She stamped her little foot. "You are being disruptive, Severus. Is something the matter?"
"Merely... getting the dried ink out of my quill, Delores," He drawled, not making eye contact with Minerva but allowing the most minuscule of smirks to cross his lips. She fought her own smile.
"I see. Now—"
Before she could get any farther into another tedious, irrelevant (or fictional) issue, he stood smoothly from his chair. "Excuse me, I have papers to grade." Without a glance in her direction, he turned and strode out of the room, robes billowing out behind him as he left.
With perhaps excessive noise the rest of the staff stood, scraping the legs of their chairs on the floor and talking amongst one another. Minerva smiled now and followed in Severus' wake, heading for Gryffindor tower.
During breakfast the next morning, when Umbridge decided to announce the new Decree to the students, there was a near-constant rhythm of quill nubs against the staff table throughout the entire speech.
.-.. - - -.- / .- - / - ... . .. .-. / ..-. .- -.-. ... look at their faces. Severus.
.- .-.. -... ..- ... / .-.. - - -.- ... / -.-. .- .-.. - / -... ..- - / -.- - ..- / -.-. .- -. / - . .-.. .-.. / ... . ... / ... . . - ... .. -. -. Albus looks calm but you can tell hes seething. Minerva.
... . / -.. - . ... -. - / .-.. .. -.- . / ... ... .- .-. .. -. -. / .- - - . -. - .. - -. he doesn't like sharing attention. Severus again.
.- - / .-.. . .- ... - / ... ... . / -. - - / - ... . / -.-. ..- .-. ... . -.. / .- - -… at least she got the cursed job. It went back and forth between them.
.-.. . - ... / - .- -.- . / -... . - ... / - -. / ... - .- / ... ... . .-.. .-.. / -.. .. . let's take bets on how she'll die.
-.- - ..- .-. . / - -. -..- / ... .-.. -.- - ... . .-. .. -. you're on, slytherin
- . -. / -. .- .-.. .-.. . - -. ... / ... .- -.- ... / .-. - - - . .-. / .. ... / .. -. ...- - .-.. ...- . -.. ten galleons says potters involved
.-. - - - . .-. / .. ... / .- .-.. .- .- -.- ... / .. -. ...- - .-.. ...- . -.. / - ... .- - ... / -. - - / ..-. .- .. .-. that's not fair potter's always involved
- ... / .-.. - - -.- / - ... . / - - .- -.. ... / .- .- -. -.. / ... .- -. -.. / .. ... / - .- .. - -.-. ... .. -. -. oh look the toad's wand hand is twitching
-.- - ..- .-. . / ...- . .-. -.- / .- -. -. - -.- .. -. -. you're very annoying
-.- . ... / .. - / -.- ..- .. - . / .- -.. . .-. - / .- - / - ... .- - yes I'm quite adept at that
.. -.. / .-.. .. -.- . / - - / ... . . / - ... .- - / - .. .-. . ... - - . / - .-. .- ...- . ... - -.- / - ..-. / .- / - . .- -.-. ... . .-. / - .-. -.- / - - / -... .- -. / -.- ..- .. .-.. .-.. … I'd like to see that tiresome travesty of a teacher try to ban quills
-.. - -. - / .- .. -. -..- / .. - / .. / -.. - -. - / .- .- -. - / - - / -... . / .- .-. .. - .. -. -. / .-. - - .. - -. / .. -. -. .-. . -.. .. . -. - ... / .- .. - ... / -... .-.. - - -.. / - -. / .- / -... .-.. .- -.. . / - ..-. / -. .-. .- ... ... / ..-. - .-. / - ... . / .-. . ... - / - ..-. / - ... . / -.- . .- .-. dont jinx it I dont want to be writing potions ingredients with blood on a blade of grass for the rest of the year
-.. - -. - / -... . / -.. .- ..-. - / -.- - ..- / .- - ..- .-.. -.. / .-.. - ...- . / ... - .- / - . .-.. - -.. .-. .- - .- - .. -.-. / .- .-. .. - .. -. -. / .. -. / -... .-.. - - -.. / .- - ..- .-.. -.. / -... . / - ... .- - ... / .-. .. -. ... - / ..- .-. / -.- - ..- .-. / .- .-.. .-.. . -.- dont be daft you would love how melodramatic writing in blood would be that's right up your alley
..- ... / .-.. - -. -. / .- ... / .. - ... / .- / ... - ..- -.. . -. - .-. ... / .- -. -.. / -. - - / - .. -. . as long as it's a student's and not mine
Minerva glared at him. About then, Umbridge stopped and swivelled around and glared at them with bug eyes.
"You're using morse code to talk about me!" she said shrilly. The students began giggling, but a look from the two teachers in question quelled the laughter.
"Yes, we took a class on a very outdated, very unnecessary form of communication just so we could talk about you in front of you." McGonagall spoke dryly, as if uninterested with the conversation at hand.
Umbridge trembled with rage and stalked back to her seat at the other end of the table. Minerva leaned over to Professor Flitwick, sitting next to her on the other side than Severus, and whispered, "That's... exactly what we did."
Flitwick snorted into his pumpkin juice and Madame Hooch thumped him on the back a few times as he almost choked.
"Education Decree No. 35: Anyone communicating by means of secret messages, codes, or tapping of quills will be permanently removed from the premises."
"She can't stop us from blinking it," Severus said as he and Minerva looked up at the new sign.
She laughed perhaps the first genuine and unrestrained laugh she had allowed herself in months. In the hallway, they heard the clicking of heels. Turning quickly, instead of seeing Umbridge, they were surprised to see Dumbledore tap dancing down the hallway toward them, eyes twinkling. It took a moment for them to realise: he was using his heels to send a message in morse code.
- .- .-. / - - / - ... . / -... . .- - / - ..-. / -... . .- - .. -. -. / .- / -... .. - -.-. ... / - .- .-. / - - / - ... . / -... . .- - tap to the beat of beating a bitch tap to the beat
He smiled broadly at them as he passed, returning to his normal pace as he opened the doors to the great hall.
Minerva and Severus shared an amused glance, watching him continue away from them into the great hall. Then Severus squinted his eyes and leaned forward.
"Is he wearing magical stilettos?"