Disclaimer: The "Star Trek" movies and its characters don't belong to me. I only borrow them for this story.

A/N: I just remembered that I never uploaded this story here (only on AO3), so here it is.

Another shot.

Another Saurian brandy.

Another whiskey.

Another vodka.

Gosh, he was feeling sick to his stomach. But it didn't matter. Nothing mattered.

Jim nodded his head to the rhythm of the music. The beat caused his body to move by itself. He couldn't stop it.

The club. It was the only place he could have escaped to.

Some alcohol, some nice boys and girls, good music. It would certainly cheer him up, wouldn't it? It always had back in Iowa.

Jim's vision was getting blurry but he didn't care. He moved into the crowd and danced with a few girls. He kissed some of them, tasted their lips on his.It wasn't the same. It wasn't like… Spock's kisses. It wasn't like the Vulcan's hands touching him.

No! He couldn't think of him. After all he was here to… forget about him. To forget about these beautiful brown eyes. These lovely pointed ears. These strong but tender hands.

"Next round's on me!" Jim yelled loudly and he felt himself getting lifted off the ground by a cheering crowd.Yeah… they loved him. They all loved the great James Tiberius Kirk.

He smiled to himself as he stared at the colorful lights above his head while the people carried him over to the bar. It was gorgeous. So much better than just seeing the inside of a starship all day. The boring white walls.

"Oi! Let him down!"

A voice. There was a familiar voice trying to drown out the happy noises of the partying people.

Jim swayed when he was let down to the ground and he grinned at the person standing in front of him.

"Scotty, hey. Right on time. Was just about to order another round for everyone," he slurred and wrapped one arm around the chief engineer, pulling him closer.

"Laddie…"

He knew that Scotty was about to say something which would destroy his oh so perfect mood so Jim quickly pressed his finger against the Scotsman's lips.

"Shh, shh, shh. What," he hiccuped, "what do you want? Some Scotch maybe?"

Yeah. Scotty always loved a glass of good ol' Scotch. Surely he couldn't say no to it.

"Jimbo, ye gotta stop drinking, mate. I'm here to take ye home."

Home. What home?

There was nobody there waiting for him. Nobody important anyway.

Spock was gone. His love, his t'hy'la the one person he cared about the most, wasn't there.

Jim shook his head, feeling even more dizzy than before.

"Nah, just stay here and celebrate with us."

Kirk turned to the bar keeper to make his order but Scotty grabbed his shoulder and turned him back.

"Ye've had enough. Come on."

Anger started to rise in Jim's stomach. Who the hell was Scotty to tell him if he had enough? It was none of his business. Jim was a grown man. He could drink as much as he wanted to.

"I won't leave."

Scotty grabbed his arm and tried to pull him along but Jim shoved the hand off.

"I'll stay!"

What didn't Scott understand about that?

"No, ye won't. I said I'd bring ye home and I will."

While Jim had raised his voice, Scotty was still very calm. Despite the dim lighting, Jim could see the pity in his eyes. The damn pity he had seen all day. The damn pity he had tried to escape from.

"You can't force me. I'm your superior officer."

He was the captain. He wouldn't let his CEO order him around when it should be the other way around.

Jim turned once again to the bar and when Scotty grabbed his arm once more, he lost his.

"Jim…"

Kirk swirled around, the fist hitting its target right away.

Scotty's nose.

It was bleeding. And it looked disfigured.

For a moment Jim was happy about the shocked look on Scott's face. He had showed him who was in charge. A moment later though, the captain realized what he had done just now.

He had broken his engineer's nose. He had broken his friend's nose.

Jim's eyes widened in surprise at his own actions. How could he do this?

Scotty just stared at him.

"Scotty, I…"

Kirk felt tears swelling in his eyes, remembering the last blood he had seen.

It had been green. And it had been all over the place.

Carefully Jim reached over and wiped away the blood running down Scotty's face.

He had hurt him. Jim had hurt a person close to him. A person trying to help him.

The captain expected his chief engineer to yell at him or to punch him back. He had all right to do so after all.

But Scotty didn't say a word. He simply grabbed his friend's arm once more and started to lead the way.

Jim followed.

It was cold outside the club and he instantly started to shiver. Jim wanted to say something… to apologize for what he had done just now, but no word left his mouth.

He looked at Scotty's still bleeding face. And suddenly the tears started to fall.

"I'm sorry," he whispered and when Scotty's arms pulled him into a hug, he couldn't help but sob like a little child.

"Shh, it's okay."

Fingers ran through his hair and Jim buried his face in the Scotsman's shoulder.

"I… I just want Spock."

His voice was hoarse and he coughed in between the sobs.

"Aye. I know, laddie. I know."

But Scotty also knew that it was impossible. Even though he didn't say it out loud.

They both knew the truth. Spock would never be there again for Jim.

"I'm here for ye. And… and Leonard is. And Uhura, Sulu, Chekov…"

Yes… there were people who loved him. People who cared about him. How could Jim just leave them behind? How could he be so stupid?

"We'll get through this…"

Maybe. Maybe they actually could do it. And even though Jim didn't know how yet, he knew that someone was there for him, to put him in his place. And… to bring him back home.