31/07 I DECIDED TO REWRITE THIS WHOLE SERIE, SO THERE'S NOT GOING TO BE UPDATES FOR A WHILE.
Notes: This is supposed to be between chapters 3 and 4 of Fall into the trap. I just decided to post it apart, just to leave that fic more focused on Billy & Roman interactions. I mean, it's kinda fluffy...? It doesn't go with the tone of that fic. I would say it is more like a Rock Bottom flashback I suppose...? Anyway, I just felt like writing it. Hope you enjoy 😉 Feel free to leave a comment.
Hours later, Billy is at his house, alone, his father nowhere to be seen. Roman brought him a couple of hours before in his car.
He is alone in his room, two 2 am, staring at the ceiling, thinking about everything that has happened to him that night. The discovery of his father cheating with Sidney's mother was the prominent thought in his mind.
He feels so many emotions at once that his mind jumps from analyzing one to the next one and then another, making everything more confusing. But now that he was alone, that he was not being manipulated by Roman's experience, he was starting to see things more clearly too, and if he was already feeling shame and guilt,he also feels stupid and gullible.
He's trying to calm himself down. Thinking about everything Roman has told him, everything he's learned about himself that day. Every time he gets close to a calm, rational thought, he's overcome with another wave of hurt and anger, which forces him out of those thoughts and into a bitter, resentful rage.
He can feel those thoughts of violence creep back into his mind, and he's doing his best to push them aside, but they keep coming back. He's so confused and full of rage, and he doesn't know what to do about it.
Stu is going from Casey's home to his own, on a bicycle, since his car would get Casey's parents attention and that was not something he wanted.
It is not the first night he would sneak into his girlfriend's room, make out with her or even more, and leave after midnight towards his home. But tonight he has broken his bicycle midway and he is too tired to walk to his house.
Luckily, his friend Billy lived around there, so he decided to go pay him a visit.
He takes some pebbles from the garden and throws them towards Billy's window, praying the sound would wake him up.
It doesn't take long for the noise to get Billy out of bed, and it doesn't take long for him to open up a window and look down.
"Who is it?" he frowns and tries to peer into the shadows to see who the person is but his eyes are already half asleep so it's not the easiest thing in the world for him to do. "Is that you Stu? What are you doing out here?" he sounds slightly irritated, but not as irritated as he probably would be otherwise given how he's feeling. "Are you okay?"
Stu chuckles.
"You could say I'm not so okay at the moment. I was just about to leave Casey's place when my bicycle got a flat tire . Can I crash with you for the night, before heading back home? Just wanted to be out her house before her folks woke up"
Billy raises an eyebrow at the answer, not entirely sure if he believes it or not. And even if he does believe that there's more to the story, he's in no mood to press for any further details.
"Fine. But you gotta make this quick, I've had a rough night myself. Leave the bicycle on the front porch and come in before I change my mind , and be quiet. You can get some sleep and leave in the morning."
Stu smiles and tries to keep his energy up.
"Sure thing, Billy. Thanks!" Stu walks around the house as quietly as he can. Stu puts his bike on the front porch, he enters the house quietly, and goes straight to Billy's room, not making any noise. He quietly opens the bedroom door, he walks over to Billy standing in the doorframe.
"Hi." It's dark in the bedroom but Billy can see Stu's face in the light from the hall. "Man, I tell you, I can't seem to get a break lately… You okay?"
Billy's face is still twisted up in rage, but the presence of Stu is helping to calm him down a bit. He sighs and hangs his head a bit, but he takes a deep breath and nods. He can't resist asking.
"What, was the flat tire some kind of omen?" he gives a small smirk, even though it's clear he doesn't really find it very funny. He doesn't let on that he's feeling like killing someone at the moment either, although he's clearly not completely A-okay right now. "Yeah. I'm fine. What about you?"
Stu shakes his head, and drops himself on one edge of the bed, not really wanting to think about that right now, just thinking about catching enough sleep to not be a zombie in class.
"Man, I just can't seem to catch a break, you know? One minute it's me and Casey having the time of our lives, the next it's trying to sneak past her folks."
Billy nods in understanding. He really had no idea that Stu had been breaking into Casey's house every night, but it doesn't surprise him at all.
"Must be a pain in the ass." His face is still twisted with rage but he does let out a small snort as he speaks. "I guess she's worth it though, isn't she?" he glances over at Stu, smiling a little bit, attempting to lighten the mood. "Who knows, maybe one day she'll let you sleep over like I'm letting you do tonight."
Stu looks a little embarrassed but he chuckles. He hadn't expected Billy to be so understanding about such a topic with him.
"Man, you are so cool sometimes, Billy! You know me so well, man… Sure, it's a pain, but that girl, oh man... She sure is worth it. I hope her folks never find out about my nocturnal visitations, though. That would be a real bummer…" Stu smiles back at Billy. "You are a real friend, Billy. I appreciate you helping me out like this, it's really awesome. I swear, one day I'll repay you for this." Stu pauses for a moment and goes silent. "Billy, you mind me asking a personal question?"
Billy is surprised by Stu's sudden shift in tone. He nods at Stu before answering.
" Go for it, I don't mind. " He's a little bit curious as to what the question could be. He hopes it's nothing about Stu and Casey's relationship, he's not in the mood to hear more about that. "What's the question, Stu?"
Stu feels a bit awkward to ask this of Billy, but given their friendship he hopes he wouldn't give him any problems, so he goes ahead and asks. "Do you really like Sidney at all?"
Billy's face immediately hardens when Stu says Sidney's name, and he sits up in his bed. His eyes narrow and his voice turns cold when he speaks.
"What's it to you?" He doesn't like where this is going, and he's clearly not in the mood for anything right now, not even hearing Sidney's name, it only reminds him of her mother. He tries his hardest to make it sound like he's just joking around but even he recognizes that he failed to do so. "What, are you crushing on her or something?"
Stu flinches in response to this. He knows he probably shouldn't have asked that but his curiosity does get the best of him sometimes. Billy and Sidney's relationship is different than any other he has witnessed. He tries to laugh it off, pretending to joke around too.
"Uh, no, not really. I was just wondering, that's all." he looks up at Billy. "Is this like a touchy subject or something?"
Billy's face remains unchanged. He still feels a cold, dark anger growing inside of him, but he tries to hold it back. He doesn't like how this night is going at all and he really, really doesn't want to be here right now.
"Yeah, it's a touchy subject." His voice is completely void of any humor whatsoever. He's clearly pretty upset by this question and he isn't doing a very good job of pretending otherwise. "Why do you ask? You got a problem with it if I don't?"
Stu goes silent, his face clearly uncomfortable now.
"Not at all. Sorry, Billy." he lets out a sigh. "I never meant to make you uncomfortable, it was just... " He's about to say something else. He opens his mouth to speak, but before he does, he thinks better of it and shakes his head. He's not sure if it's worth saying what he wants to say next. He feels a little remorseful now. "Forget it. Just let it go. My bad."
It takes every bit of willpower Billy has in him not to scream at Stu to just say what's on his mind, whatever it is. But he manages to keep a lid on it a little longer.
"You sure? What were you gonna say?" he stares at Stu and doesn't move, still holding his gaze. " I'm sorry if I overreacted. I just... I'm not in the mood for that question, all right?" he lets out a heavy sigh. "Now, you wanna keep chatting or is it time for both of us to get some sleep?"
Stu nods slowly. He gets the message. He doesn't want to press the subject any further at this point.
"It's alright. I understand. No hard feelings. Besides... " he chuckles. " I'm about as sleepy as a drunk dog. I think some shut-eye is calling my name. Do you have a spare couch or something I could crash on?"
"No, I don't." Billy says, a blank expression on his face. "You should have thrown pebbles in a five star hotel..."
Stu raises an eyebrow. He's taken a little aback by this response. He's not sure what to think at first, but then he speaks with a slightly awkward grin.
" ...Then I have to ask, where exactly can I sleep?" Stu feels a bit embarrassed, although if it were anyone else, he would probably have felt way more than just embarrassed being faced with such a blunt response like that.
Billy snorts a little at Stu's response but he can't help the feeling that this whole night is just not going his way at all. He starts to respond, but then pauses and smirks wide.
" Well...there is...one place...we could sleep." he starts to get a sinister gleam in his eyes and he gets so close to Stu's face that their breath grazes together. "That is...if you're up for it? " he waits for what Stu has to say before continuing.
Stu's expression changes completely from awkward and uncomfortable to shocked, when Billy moves so closely until they are practically face to face. His face now almost entirely pink as it flushes with embarrassment. Stu can feel his heart beating out of his chest.
He blinks several times at this, the way Billy is acting makes him very nervous. He tries to play it off cool, though. He smiles awkwardly.
"I mean... I suppose I might be up for it. What are you thinking…? You got some kind of a bed set up in your closet or something? Or you mean…" the thought of what Billy is suggesting starts flashing through Stu's head "...you mean in the same bed?"
Billy doesn't hesitate at all when he answers.
"The bed.'' His face remains cold and serious when he answers and he doesn't move an inch, still sitting so close. His eyes are fixed on Stu's and he doesn't blink either. "Same one. What do you think? Like I said, only if you're up for it. The alternative is the floor but I don't think you'd be very comfortable there. So...what do you say, Stu? What's it gonna be?"
Stu's face gets even redder. For a moment he just stays there awkwardly, thinking about what he could say in response. He definitely doesn't want to be rude to Billy, especially since he was so kind to let him spend the night. In the end, after a moment of considering his options, he comes up with only one answer.
"Uhh...Yeah. The...the same bed. Fine by me, man." he forces himself to smile through his embarrassment.
Billy nods, but still doesn't break his cold, intense gaze. His face remains unchanged, although there's a small glint in his eyes. He's enjoying this, even if it's just a bit.
He speaks again, still without taking his eyes off of Stu.
"All right. Problem solved. I hope you don't snore though…" he finally makes a joke and it's followed by a slight smirk. Finally, he leans back, seeming to let out a breath he didn't even realize he was holding, and drops on his side of the bed. "Come on."
Stu's face goes completely pink again as he feels the intense gaze from Billy. He can feel his face heating up even more, a feeling he never enjoys having. He's also pretty sure that Billy was trying to mess with him too. But regardless, when Billy makes his joke and that slight smirk appears, Stu couldn't help but let out a small smile too.
"Yeah" he shrugs. " Snoring is the least of my problems."
Despite the awkwardness though, he really doesn't have a choice right now, so he follows suit. He plops down on the bed next to Billy, trying not to make the bed creak too much and leaving a bit of space between him and Billy, but without making it too obvious.
Billy continues to keep that cold facade on for a moment longer but eventually he gives into his grin as well, but only for a brief moment before he's back to being serious. He lets out an amused huff at Stu's joke.
"You're gonna keep me up with those jokes all night too? "he says it in an annoyed tone but the way he looks at Stu lets him know it's only half a joke. " It's good to see you're not just sitting there looking like a deer in headlights."
Stu chuckles at Billy, trying to play along.
"I'll make a few more jokes but I'll cut down on them after, alright? "he lets out a chuckle. "I don't want your brain melting from humor overload. " he pauses, not sure if he should move closer or keep his distance. He thinks for a moment before deciding to get a bit more comfortable in bed. He looks up at the ceiling, but doesn't move or speak for a moment. He tries to stay silent, waiting a beat to see what Billy says or does next.
Billy snorts at Stu's joking but he is quick to return to a serious demeanor. He notices Stu moving a little bit closer and he seems to be debating something inside his head. He finally makes a decision, and he moves a little bit closer to Stu as well. He still leaves a bit of space between them, but not quite as much as before. It's clear he's thinking something over.
"Do you plan on sleeping like the dead?" he asks, raising an eyebrow at Stu a little.
Stu notices Billy moving closer in the corner of his eye, and although this makes Stu a little uncomfortable he tries to play it cool. But when Billy raises his eyebrow, he feels even more uncomfortable, having a slight idea of where this might be going as he figures he should be the first to explain himself.
"Well, since we're in the same bed" he looks at Billy with a smile. "I figured I should give you some more…" he goes silent at the lack of a better word for the explanation. " context. If you don't mind?"
He pauses, feeling awkward about this and he's not sure how Billy will respond to what he's about to tell him.
"Just so you know, um... I'm not gay or anything. And...well... " he lets out a nervous laugh "I'm not here to try anything with you either. I swear!" He holds up his hand, although his face completely turns crimson again as his heart starts to beat out of his chest. He prays that Billy won't be mad or think bad of him after what he's just said.
Billy lets out a laugh of pure amusement as he listens to Stu. He's never heard anyone so nervous to reveal such basic things, and he was starting to think Stu was hiding something huge with how jumpy he was. When Stu makes it clear that he isn't even remotely homosexual, Billy begins to laugh even more, though this time it's a bit softer. He smiles at Stu and he seems genuinely amused at how worked up he got about it.
"Jesus, Stu, it's not like I thought you were planning on coming on to me. I'm not that vain."
Stu feels his face start to blush even deeper in embarrassment. Feeling awkward again and trying to laugh along with Billy despite the embarrassment, he still gives him a smile.
"Oh... uh...sorry I guess? "When Billy laughs, Stu gives a small laugh himself out of reflex. "I was...kind of worried you might… feel that way..." he sighs with relief knowing that Billy doesn't feel that way... but not without feeling silly for the way he acted first. Yet he feels a bit disappointed too, but he can't grasp his fingers on why that is. "I...yeah, nevermind. I'm an idiot."
Billy's grin grows a little bigger once Stu apologizes and he seems genuinely amused by what just happened. Seeing how easy it was to make Stu flustered is a huge ego boost for him, much more than he was expecting, and he starts feeling a little bit mean for it. But he lets Stu know he's not mad or anything.
"It's all good Stu. You had me laughing my ass off there for a minute, to be honest." and now his voice has turned a little bit softer as he speaks. " Not many people can get a rise out of me like that."
Stu smiles back now, the embarrassment having gone away.
"Yeah, you definitely had me panicking for a minute. I mean, I was not expecting to get put on the spot like that for no reason." he chuckles a little bit. "You got me good, Billy. " He sighs and stretches out in bed" So uh... "he looks behind him at the bed. "What are we supposed to do in this situation? Do we just...like...sleep?"
Billy raises his eyebrows surprised and then shakes his head in amusement.
"Well, we could cuddle." His face immediately turns into a smirk, but he says the next part in a more teasing tone. "Or we could both just shut up and sleep. Whatever you want. I won't judge." he chuckles softly and looks over at Stu with a smirk on his face. " So? Which is it gonna be? You wanna get real cozy or keep it professional? Your call."
Stu chuckles.
"Wow, you say the most romantic things. " he says in a joking tone. Billy's answer does give him more confidence as well and he feels himself calming down from before. Stu looks over at Billy in bed, feeling a slight bit guilty for how he had acted. But his embarrassment has died down and seeing that Billy doesn't look upset or uncomfortable with him, he shrugs. "Cuddling sounds nice. We don't have to make out or anything if that's what you were thinking... I know you were joking and all, but I figured... " he starts to blush again ." It just sounded comforting" he smiles shyly.
Billy grins mischievously as he hears Stu's reply. He is definitely going to tease Stu as much as he can in this situation, but he's also not complaining about the little bit of attention this is bringing him. Billy gets a little bit closer to Stu, and his face is just inches away now when he smirks and responds.
"So you're saying you wanna get real cozy?" he asks with the same teasing tone he was using earlier.
Stu smiles back, feeling a little bit flustered again at the close distance and the way that Billy says it. But after a little bit, he nods.
"Yeah...Yeah, i do " he tries to maintain a confident tone when speaking, but his voice still shakes a little in the process." Like I said, that just sounds comforting... " he feels the heat starting to rise in his face again as he looks into Billy's eyes, so he tries to joke again. "So I'm assuming you're the 'little spoon' then?"
Billy's face lights up at this question and he scoffs a little bit before responding.
"So YOU assume I'm the little spoon, huh? "in a more teasing tone. "What makes you say that? " he moves in even closer and he's smirking wide. " You think I can't be the big spoon? " His face is so close now that his breath is blowing against Stu's face. "I can big spoon too, you know."
Stu blushes even harder at the thought of being the little spoon. When Billy moves even closer to him, he starts feeling more flustered and anxious, but he tries not to back away or move. He feels his heart racing even harder now looking at Billy's smirk getting even wider and feeling his breath on his face. He's at a loss for words and he's not sure what to say when Billy asks him to explain why he thinks that. In the heat of the moment, Stu lets all his nervous energy come out and he blurts out the first thing he thinks of.
" ...Your hair's too nice…"
Billy's entire face lights up at that response, and he can't help but let out a genuine laugh at that, though it's not mean spirited.
"You're kidding, right?" he shakes his head and he's smiling so wide, and he seems genuinely surprised at Stu's response. "I can't believe you just said that. " his laugh turns into a soft chuckle as he shakes his head again. "I've got nice hair?"
Stu blushes even deeper, thinking about how stupid he probably sounds now. He still can't help himself but smile a little bit when he hears Billy laugh, even though he still feels awkward about being the one that prompted him. But he tries to play it off as a joke.
" ...Yeah? So what if I think you've got nice hair?" he gives a little grin. "Can't a man give another man a compliment while they're laying in the same bed?"
Billy lets out another soft laugh at Stu's question and he studies Stu's face for a moment. He's got a look of amusement on his face as he speaks to Stu.
"It's just a strange thing to say, you know? It never really crossed my mind that you would be thinking about my hair. Or about me in general even, if we're being honest." he smiles a little bit at the end, he seems to genuinely mean what he just said though. He's always just assumed that everyone thought the worst of him.
"You're...well...pretty good looking. " Stu blushes at how awkward and out of the blue his compliment was. "Not to be forward or anything. " Stu lets out a nervous laugh in response. "Yeah... I guess it was a pretty random thing to say... " he blushes a little bit again thinking about it and he clears his throat. "What do you think? " He raises an eyebrow at Billy and he points at the bed. "How about you give the little spoon thing a try?"
Billy rolls his eyes at Stu's comment about him being good looking. It's very clear from how he answered that he doesn't get a lot of compliments and he's not used to it at all. He lets out a small laugh in response.
"You're killing me with the compliments over here. "he smiles and then gives in to Stu's request. "Alright, alright, I guess I could take a turn at the little spoon position. But only for a minute, okay? No hogging the blanket."
Stu chuckles a little, feeling a little amused by Billy's reaction.
"What, that was enough? One compliment and I'm already killing you? " he teases. " I see, I see. I won't say anymore then." he feels a tiny bit disappointed not knowing what else to say. " Alright, alright, so I got the first turn big spoon. Sounds like a fair compromise. But uh, I might steal a bit more than a minute."
Billy scoots back a little bit, giving Stu enough room to be the big spoon, should he so choose to be. He's enjoying the banter with Stu and he's been pretty lighthearted for the past few minutes, which is a change for him. This whole night has been surprising to him, and he's been having fun doing things with Stu that he wouldn't normally do with other people.
"Alright, so go ahead and take the lead then, tough guy. I'm all yours." he whispers, in a joking tone.
Stu leans over and gives Billy a slight kiss on his cheek before he moves into a big spoon position and starts hugging him from the back. " Alright then, here goes... " he moves a bit closer to him. "I hope this isn't weird." he blushes again, but he continues hugging Billy from behind and lays his head against Billy's shoulder. "I mean it is, but not THAT weird, right?" he chuckles nervously. "Are you comfortable?"
Billy freezes when he feels the kiss and he can't help but crack a smile when Stu asks if it's weird, though he also feels a little bit nervous and awkward. He wasn't expecting Stu to do something like that at all, but he doesn't want to bring attention to it. In the slightest of movements he leans back a little bit when Stu asks if he's comfortable but he smiles more. "I think so. I'm kind of surprised how nice this feels. " he chuckles a little bit as well. "I can get used to this."
Stu smiles when he sees Billy smile, and he's glad he seemed to like it. When he hears that Billy can get used to it, he hugs him a little bit tighter. He also gives Billy a little squeeze on the arms.
" I know right? Isn't it so comfortable? "he smiles again" Do you mind if i hold you like this for a bit longer? Like… this entire night even?"
Billy considers it for a moment and then he sighs.
"It is pretty comfy. And feel free to go all night. I ain't exactly got anywhere else to be." he whispers that with a little laugh, which dies out quickly. " I'm just gonna tell you up front that I might fall asleep on you."
Stu chuckles a bit at this.
"That's okay, you can sleep. I don't mind. I might even join you." he laughs a little bit and kisses the back of Billy's head again. "And you know what? I wouldn't mind waking up like this too." He smiles a little bit and lays his head against Billy's shoulder again.
Billy smiles at the kiss and he lets out a soft laugh at the thought of waking up tomorrow still cuddled like this. He's honestly enjoying it more than he would have thought, and he's a little bit shocked that he just admitted that out loud.
" Yeah. This is nice." he sighs, completely content with being held here and being so close to Stu. " Honestly, I'm actually kind of surprised I'm letting you hold me like this."
" Alright, then that sounds perfect. I'm pretty tired too, so I wouldn't blame you if you do fall asleep. But uh...i was kinda just wondering… "he looks down at Billy out of the corner of his eye. "Do you think this means anything? Or is this just like...a friendly thing between two guys?"
Billy's face flushes bright pink at that question and he hesitates for a second before answering. This is not what he expected out of tonight and he has to think carefully to make sure he knows exactly how to answer this question. He thinks about what he's going to say for a moment and then takes a deep breath. He looks up at Stu and he's got a serious expression on his face.
"It's more than friendly, Stu." he mutters in a low voice.
Stu blushes a little harder at Billy's response.
"Are you sure about that? "he gives Billy a tighter hug as a smile comes across his face. "Because if that's really how you feel, then I might be even more happy about tonight than you are." he chuckles a little bit, starting to get really tired himself. "But hey, no expectations though. I just felt like it was probably better to be on the same wavelength about something like this you know... " he yawns a little bit and closes his eyes. " If you need some help falling asleep, I could start rocking you too if you want…"
Billy scoffs when Stu asks if he wants to be rocked. He's still blushing and he nods his head.
"Yeah. That'd be really nice right now, actually. I wouldn't mind at all." he starts to get a bit exhausted as well and he yawns quietly" I'm just so tired…"
Stu smiles a little bit as he starts to slowly move his body back and forth to rock Billy with the arms he's holding him with. He's also feeling his eyelids start to get a little heavy and his eyes are starting to drift shut, but he keeps looking at Billy for a few more seconds before he yawns.
"I'm pretty tired too... " he blinks a little bit. " Well, then get some sleep then. I think you need it... " he yawns again. " If this position gets too uncomfortable for you later, tell me. "he starts to nod off.
Billy nods and he lets out the start of a tiny yawn. He's trying to stay awake, but as he's rocked back and forth, the exhaustion becomes more and more evident. After a few more minutes he starts to nod off as well, still in Stu's arms.
He chuckles quietly and closes his eyes when Stu yawns, and a few seconds later, he's fast asleep, snoring softly.
Soon he's completely out, breathing deeply and evenly as the rocking sends him gently into slumber, thoughts of Roman or Maureen completely forgotten.
The next morning when he wakes up, Stu is already gone. Billy stretches and yawns as he slowly wakes up, the sunlight peeking through the curtains as his eyes start to adjust. He sits straight up and yawns again, his face still tired as he rubs his eyes. He's got a small smile on his face and he sighs, starting to wake up. He doesn't get up, but he does take a look out the window with a slight smile on his face. He had a nice time, he decides. Even if it was all a dream…
Notes: I have a Twitter account too. It's Stuillyficker96 ... I wabted to use Iwritesomeshit but it was taken