The Hunter

Chapter Thirty-Three

Author's Note: I recently re-discovered this chapter that I thought had been lost to a system meltdown on my computer. I hope you guys don't mind me squeezing it in.

She still dreamt of him. Sometimes she would wake and the dream would cling to the periphery of her consciousness with a fading memory of his honeyed-amber eyes. Other times it was the lingering touch of his fingertips drifting across her skin, or the whispered sound of her name on his lips. There were times, too, when her dreams were so vivid they felt almost real.

As the weeks slipped by, the simmering rage she'd felt towards him lost some of its bite. And she was glad for it. Resigning Sesshomaru to her past meant she was free to move on without fear of interference. Secretly she was relieved, too, that her strength of will wouldn't be tested. In her heart she knew who she was meant to be with, but his very presence had a way of making her question everything she thought she was certain about.

Yes, it was easier with him gone, but that didn't make the shock of his sudden death any less difficult to overcome. It wasn't easy accepting that she would never have answers to the questions she longed to ask him. She would never know the truth about why he'd spent so much time lying to her about who and what he was. Had it all been simply to seduce her? Or was there some more nefarious motive in play? He owed her those answers at least, but none would be forthcoming.

Maybe it was that unfinished business which allowed him to boldly enter her dreams night after night. Tonight's dream had started out like many of the others, with snow was falling softly amongst the trees. The forest around her was quiet, deathly still. Nothing stirred but her, not even the wind. She walked barefoot through pure white snow drifts, but felt no hint of the cold.

Her feet came to a halt in a small clearing, and though she was certain she'd never seen it before the place was achingly familiar. There were no footsteps in the new fallen snow but for those behind her, the ones that would lead her back to the village and Kohaku. If she'd been to this place before, there was no trace of it now.

She tilted her head heavenward in search of the moon and saw its thin silver crescent shining behind the snow laden tree tops. It appeared so real that she reached her hand out as if to touch it. In that same moment there was a subtle shift in the energy around her. The hairs on her arms stood on end and she lowered her gaze from the moon to find him standing no more than a few paces away.

He stared at her quietly, his ethereal form imposing in the moonlight. She stared back, awed by this unearthly beauty. He spoke her name but not in a way that was familiar. The word seemed to echo from all around her, as if the trees themselves had spoken. The single syllable faded and she stared hard at his mouth, waiting for him to speak again.

"Why are you here?" she demanded at last, surprised by how loud her voice sounded.

How many times had they had this conversation? How many encounters had they shared just like this one?

He spoke her name again and with a single indecipherable step he moved closer. He stood within touching distance now, towering over her so that she was forced to tilt her head back to look into those familiar amber eyes. She heard the sound of her name whispered through the trees once more and felt the light touch of his fingertips at her temple. Her eyes drifted closed, and that was when he answered.

"I am coming."

Her heart lurched in her chest and her eyes snapped open.

"What did you say?"

She stumbled backwards until her back met the trunk of the nearest tree. Never before had he said more than her name, she was certain of it. His figure began to retreat as it always did, slipping back into the shadows of the forest.

"Don't go!" she called out and chased after him a few plodding steps in the deep snow. "Please, Sesshomaru!"

"Wait for me."

His words echoed in her thoughts until long after the forest had swallowed him up again. How many times had they met like this? In how many other dreams had he delivered that same message? Wait for me… What was he trying to tell her?

"Rin!"

She heard her name echo from somewhere far off. Was he calling to her again? Had he returned to provide some much needed answers?

She awoke to the feeling of being shaken and blinked dazedly at Sango's worried expression.

"Rin! What are you doing out here? It's freezing!" the demon slayer admonished and draped a heavy blanket over her shoulders.

Rin blinked again and gazed about the eerily familiar clearing, with no memory of how she'd arrived there.

"What am I doing here?"

Her eyes lingered on the spot where Sesshomaru had only just vanished between the trees and felt unease churn suddenly in the pit of her stomach. How long had she been standing there? Judging by the painful burning sensation coming from her bare feet, it'd been long enough.

Was this the first time she'd walked to this place in a dreamlike state? Had there been other encounters? Other nights like this she could no longer remember? Had any of it been real? Overwhelmed by a sudden panic, she gripped Sango's proffered arm tight and let herself be guided back in the direction of the village.

"What were you thinking coming out here at night? These woods are dangerous," Sango chided. Her concern was sincere when she added, "Something awful could have happened to you, Rin."

"I think I was dreaming…" she said, by way of an explanation as the clearing was enveloped by the dark forest behind them. "I dreamt of…"

Her mind flashed with vivid memories of his honeyed eyes and the warm caress of his breath on the skin of her cheek. Even the hair at her temples still tingled with the lingering remnants of his too-real touch. Her eyes met Sango's and the sudden surge of guilt she felt quickly forced them away again.

She let her words fade and shook her head, "I'm sorry. It is fading too quickly…"

In truth she remembered every detail but dared not utter a word. The most likely explanation was that her guilt and grief had simply overwhelmed her. The alternative was far more disturbing to consider. If Sesshomaru had survived the Shogun's attack, would he come all this way to find her? And if he did, would he destroy the village that'd begun to feel like a second home? Draw his sword against Kohaku even?

Or worse still, remind her that she'd loved him once too. And still did.

A shiver that had very little to do with the cold shuddered down her spine and she gripped Sango's arm tighter.

"I think your dreams may be trying to kill you," the demon slayer said and sent a concerned glance back over her shoulder at the forest behind them. "Come on, let's get you warmed up."

oOo

"You don't remember anything? You're certain?"

Rin shook her head and avoided meeting Takanori's probing gaze. Her brothers had joined them in the headman's hut and were exchanging worried glances on the other side of the hearth fire.

"It's a good thing Sango found you when she did," Ryo said quietly. "You could have died out there in that cold."

Kohaku was crouched behind her, his hands rubbing her arms through the heavy blanket still draped over her shoulders. Whatever he was thinking, he was keeping it to himself. His silence unsettled her more than the dream walking had. She missed being able to talk to him like she had on their journey to Edo. Even when they'd been fighting there'd been a current of honesty underlying their words. They hadn't quite reclaimed that yet, now that they were in his village, but she hoped they would in time.

There would be no avoiding talking about this incident with him, but she couldn't even begin to form a suitable explanation. None of it made any sense. And there were Kohaku's feelings to consider, too. How would he take to learning she still dreamt about the daimyo? Or worse, that she still cared for him? He held the man in such contempt, how could he possibly understand? Her stomach churned just thinking about how he might react and how hurt he would be.

"I must have been dream walking," she explained to the others with a dismissive shake of her head. "It's not as though I planned to go trudging through the snow in the middle of the night without shoes on."

"We'll just have to be more careful," Kohaku suggested and offered her a reassuring smile.

Her hand found his atop her shoulder and she gave it a light squeeze. They'd overcome so much already. They were strong enough to overcome this, too. She made up her mind to talk with him about the dreams later, when they could be alone. She wanted his insight, but more importantly she needed him to know. There was no room for secrets between them, especially where Sesshomaru was concerned.

Sango offered her a piping hot bowl of miso soup and she gratefully accepted it. The radiant heat from the bowl seeped into her hands bone deep and she sighed with relief as the taught, shivering muscles in her back began to relax.

"I'm sorry to have caused so much trouble," she said with a contrite glance at the worried faces surrounding her.

"We're just glad you're safe," Sango said and her brothers nodded in agreement.

A new sort of warmth spread through her, surging outward from the center of her chest to the very tips of her numbed toes. She had somewhere to belong and a family to be a part of. It was all there in front of her, a vision of a future she'd never thought possible. And it could be hers. All she had to do was want it.

Her eyes met Kohaku's warm gaze and she remembered a pair of unearthly amber eyes that seemed to look into her very soul. She disguised her abruptly fading smile with a long sip of soup from her bowl and tried her best not to think overmuch about her too-vivid, too jarringly real dream of Sesshomaru and what it meant for them all.

oOo

Kohaku lowered himself onto the wooden step next to her and her head instinctively came to rest against his shoulder. She'd been readying herself for this conversation since daybreak. He'd been too quiet the night before. It wasn't like him to keep his thoughts so closely guarded, and so she'd waited expectantly all morning for him to find her and begin peppering her with questions. But now that he'd arrived he seemed content to simply sit with her. He slid his arm around her waist and pressed a kiss into her hair and that was when she felt her eyes unexpectedly well up with tears.

She hadn't realized just how badly she'd needed his support until that very moment. She'd become so used to not depending on anyone else that she'd forgotten when it felt like to need someone in her corner. Her arms wrapped around his waist and held tight. The solid warmth of him was comforting, and her apprehensions melted away as she breathed in the familiar scent of him. This was real, and it was something worth protecting.

"I dreamt of him," she admitted quietly, certain now that honesty was her best approach. "I keep dreaming about him."

Kohaku exhaled a low sigh, "I thought as much."

She pulled back so she could turn her face up to his, "I understand if you are angry."

The muscles in his jaw moved as he clenched it tight, but there was no vehemence in his eyes when they met hers. Exhaustion and uncertainty maybe, but not anger.

"You did nothing wrong," he determined and she lay her head back down against his shoulder.

If that was the case, why did she feel so guilty? Was it because Sesshomaru's touch had excited her more than she thought it would? Or that a secret part of her hoped Sesshomaru would come after all?

"It felt so real," she mused, her voice far away. "Almost like he was there, standing right in front of me."

"Do you think he could have been?" His tone was curious but she felt the sudden tension in his shoulders beneath her cheek.

"No," she determined with a shake of her head. "He said he was coming. He wouldn't say that if he were already here."

Kohaku made a displeased noise in the back of his throat.

"Do you think it's possible that he survived?"

"I suppose it is."

His hand brushed thoughtfully across his mouth and his eyes lingered on the tall palisade wall he'd helped build. No doubt he was considering the implications of a demon that strong headed towards the village. The wall may be strong, but it would offer little resistance to a demon of that calibre. If it came down to a fight…

Rin shut her eyes against the thought of Sesshomaru laying waste to the village and asked instead, "Have you heard of demons sending messages through dreams before?"

Kohaku nodded distractedly, "Some. Mostly to prey on humans."

"I don't think he has any intentions of eating me."

"There are other ways demons can prey a human."

Rin felt her cheeks grow hot. Oh.

Kohaku's body had become tense beneath her hands, as though he were already readying for a fight. She searched for the right words to ease his worries, determined to do something to fix what she'd had a hand in breaking.

"I'm sorry I made you worry."

He turned his face towards her and she felt some of the tension leave the muscles in his back. He smiled and then pressed a soft kiss against her lips.

"I'll keep you safe," he promised in earnest. "No matter what comes through those gates."

She nodded and her fingers entwined with his, "I know."

"Tomorrow morning…" His words stalled and he braved a smile before hastily averting his eyes from hers. "Will you join me for a walk tomorrow morning? There's something I'd like to show you."

His thumb drifted across the back of her hand in a light caress that sent goose bumps rippling up her arm. She wanted very much to kiss him again, and nothing quite so innocent as the ones they'd shared since arriving. Instead she offered him a shy smile and nodded in agreement.

"Of course."