Safely on the Edge

by FictionWriter91

Rita Vrataski never dreamed she'd be a soldier, yet here she is. With death surrounding her daily and feeling hopeless about seeing her loved ones again, Rita starts hardening again, but it also makes her reflect on her history with Luke Wright, and it becomes clearer that she really does want him back in her life. But how does one come back from breaking a heart? (Part II of III)

18. Chapter 17: 1995

Come as You Are by Nirvana

La Grange by ZZ Top

Call My Name by Third Day

Elysia's Eyes by Audiomachine

Truly Amazing by P.O.D.

I Love You by Siddhartha Khosla

A Hell of a Week by Siddhartha Khosla

Man, I keep making these chapters longer and longer...I just have so much to say and so little room to say it. I'm contemplating putting together a compilation of deleted scenes in a story if its own just to keep adding to this when Part III is done.

Don't worry, Brendan is alive as per chapter 28 in Part I ;) This story (present chapters) is Rita's journey to discovering this.

100 reviews! I'm so, so thankful and grateful and appreciate everyone's continued support :) Happy reading!

---

1995—September

Montana, U.S.

The new school year was pretty mundane. Rita missed summer, but she also didn't mind winter. It was late September, and she was watching Luke getting ready to go out somewhere. It was a Saturday night, and it was the third time that month he'd gone out. Melissa had graduated the year before with Mike and Vince and had gone off to college/university (after saying goodbye to Luke, of course...Rita still felt jealous about their last hug goodbye), Sam had gone to live with his father and was at a different school, and Jordan had taken to being more involved with his soccer teammates, so Luke was relatively on his own now and trying to meet new people. Rita knew he still hung out with Jordan, but it wasn't as often anymore.

"Where are you going?" she asked, unable to help herself. He was sliding his cowboy boots on, pulling his jeans over top of them. She remembered when her father had given him his own pair and a black, velvet cowboy hat to go with them to keep the sun off him out in the fields with Kenny. Rita had damn near swooned at how handsome he'd looked. Even now, in his blue jeans and grey t-shirt, she was feeling all sorts of butterflies inside. He pulled his black leather jacket on as he lifted a brow at her.

"Out," he answered. "Why?"

"You don't normally go out, but you have been lately."

"I'm aware." He grabbed his keys next, and Rita suddenly just wanted to be with him. She didn't want to be home alone. Her father was over at Kenny's having a guys' night (which she knew really meant poker), and she didn't want to miss out on whatever fun Luke was going to have. She knew her father wouldn't be home until late, especially if he was losing.

"So where are you going?"

"A hangout, okay? Nothing crazy."

"I wanna come too," she declared.

"You're not," Luke retorted, moving past her to the door. She blocked him.

"I can just stowaway in the backseat," she warned. He scoffed.

"I don't think so."

"Luke, please," she begged. "I'm so bored. I don't want to be home alone! Take me with you." She gave him her best pleading eyes, and she watched him sigh heavily and work his jaw.

"It's not a good idea," he tried.

"I'll be good. I swear," she promised. He looked at the clock and back at her, thinking. Then he pointed a finger at her.

"You do exactly as I say," he ordered. "You don't backtalk or argue with me about anything. Got it?"

"Yep," she said, nodding vigorously. She figured she could work on those rules on the way there.

"Hurry up," he instructed.

"What should I wear?"

"That is fine," he answered, looking at her. She looked down at herself. She was in jeans and a red, plaid, long sleeved shirt with a black tank top underneath.

"Really?"

"Yea. Come on before I change my mind."

She bounded after him. "Should I leave a note for Dad?"

"I'll be home before he is."

"Okay."

She felt giddy with excitement. She was going out with Luke! It wasn't a date, of course, which she'd prefer, but still...he was letting her be a part of wherever he was going. It was thrilling.

After twenty minutes, he pulled his car up a long driveway and parked, and Rita could hear music thumping from the house without even getting out. She realized this was more than a hangout. This was a party! Her very first party to boot. Her father would be so pissed, but she figured she was safe if she was with Luke.

"No drinking," Luke warned, pointing a finger at her again. "No drugs, and no boys."

"No boys?" she asked. "Why not?"

"I don't feel like dragging you out of a bedroom from under some wasted arsehole who just wants a good time," he said. She stared at him. This was new. He'd never sounded so fierce before.

"Why do you care?" she challenged.

"You know why," he answered. "Promise me." So he wasn't going to actually say it. This frustrated her a little bit. She didn't answer as she opened the door and got out. "Rita!" She walked towards the house. She was 15. This was her first party, and she wasn't going to let Luke ruin it for her. She was feeling a thrill when he caught up to her.

"Hey," he said. "Promise me, or we're leaving right now." She gave him a defiant stare, and he locked his jaw and raised his left brow in return.

"Fine," she said. "No fun."

The door blew open before he could respond, and a group of drunk, giggling girls came out.

"Hi, Luke," one said, touching his shoulder as they passed. Rita gave him a look.

"Oh, so I can't hang out with a boy, but you can hang out with a girl?" she asked.

"I'm older and Lance isn't gonna kill me over it," Luke retorted. He gripped her elbow and ushered her inside, and Rita felt overwhelmed suddenly by all the commotion. There were teenagers everywhere, and most were drinking. A lot were dancing. Others were playing a drinking game, and some were in the corner smoking what Rita was pretty sure weren't cigarettes.

"Hey, Lukey!" someone shouted.

"The Lukester is here!" another called. Rita looked at him, brow raised. For a guy who claimed he did not have friends, he sure had enough people know who he was.

"Come on," Luke instructed, pulling her along with him as he pushed his way through the crowd. He approached the trio of guys who were all holding a beer and grinning. Rita did not really recognize them.

"Who's this treat?" one asked, eyeing Rita up and down.

"Sod off," Luke warned.

"Oh, sorry. Your girlfriend?"

Rita opened her mouth to say no when Luke hooked an arm around her neck and pulled her close, pressing his lips into the side of her head briefly. She had instant shivers all over and felt her stomach drop.

"Duly noted," the guy said, nodding.

"You wanna play?" the second guy asked.

"Yea, sure."

"Amp's out back with the rest."

"Alright."

"Play?" Rita asked, feeling surprised. She was still feeling shocked from his action of kissing her head.

"Yea," Luke said, looking at her. She noticed his arm was still around her neck, and he was relatively close to her.

"Play what?"

He just smiled that infuriating smile of his and let her go before following the other boys. Rita felt like a piece of meat as she walked behind him, noticing all the teenage boys leering at her or staring as she passed. Without really thinking about it, she reached to grab Luke's hand. He looked back at her in surprise but didn't pull away or ask her why. He understood. She knew she looked older than 15, so most people here would think that. If they ran into people they knew, then it would be made aware how old she really was.

They went out to the back deck where more people were hanging out and drinking or laughing. Luke let go of Rita's hand when one of his buddies handed him an electric guitar. Rita felt immense surprise at this. Since when could he play a guitar? And who were these people? How did he know them?

The second guy slung his bass over his shoulder, and the third guy jumped on the drums behind them.

"Go ahead and feel it out," the first guy said to Luke. Rita watched in fascination as Luke played a riff that sounded so damn cool that Rita couldn't stop feeling giddy inside.

"It'll do," Luke said to the guy.

"Alright. Let 'er rip," he replied. Rita hopped up on the railing of the deck and watched.

"What're we doing?" the bassist asked.

"Eh, 'Come As You Are,'" the first guy (clearly the singer) said with a shrug.

"Alright, alright, alright," the drummer said, twirling his sticks. Rita had to keep her mouth from falling open as Luke started to play. He did it with such ease, and she couldn't help but wonder why he'd never told her he could do this.

Screams of joy sounded behind Rita, and she twisted to see a crowd gathering to watch. Some started to dance. Others came out of the house like ants, and Rita was doing her best to not get crowded where she was sitting.

"Hey," a voice said next to her, and she looked to see a guy leaning over the railing and looking at her. "You're new."

"Oh, yea," Rita said. "I guess I am." She gave a nervous laugh and tucked her hair behind her ear.

"I'm Cole," he said.

"Rita."

"Beautiful name for a beautiful girl," Cole said with a smile. Rita felt herself blush and then cleared her throat. She looked to see Luke watching carefully, and she flashed him a smile. She was fine. She had this.

"How can I help you, Cole?" she asked, looking back at the boy. He was blonde and blue eyed, a bit taller than her, and lean and lanky.

"You want a drink?" he offered.

"No, thanks."

"Ah, a sober girl," he said, nodding knowingly. "You don't know what you're missing."

"I'm good."

"You wanna dance?"

Rita did kind of want to dance. She looked back at Luke, who was still watching her. There was a sharp look in his eyes now as he sensed what she was about to do. She knew he couldn't do anything about it in this moment, so she slid off the railing and walked around to where Cole was standing.

"Sure," she said. He gave a slow smile, and then he rested his hand on her lower back and guided her to where the others were dancing. She made sure Luke could still see her and know that she hadn't disappeared. She felt a bit self-conscious at first, but then she got into it. The song changed to "La Grange" after a moment, and she laughed as Cole took her hands and spun her around and moved her back and forth.

"You've got great rhythm," Cole said to her, pulling her close. She felt dizzy and giddy, and she didn't even notice at first where his hands were until she suddenly did.

"Um, sorry," she said, reaching to pull them off the back of her jeans. "I'm not into that."

"Gorgeous thing like you? I find that hard to believe," Cole said. He touched her neck and traced down to her shoulder, and she didn't quite like how it felt. There was something about it that sent red flags all throughout her body.

"I think I'm gonna go," she tried, but he pulled her in to kiss her, and she couldn't push him off. His hands grabbed her bottom once more. The song had changed again, and Rita wondered if Luke had lost sight of her or if he didn't care. She suddenly wanted him to care. She suddenly wished she hadn't done this to piss him off. She was still trying to push Cole off while keeping her teeth clenched shut against his tongue when hands broke them apart.

"You seriously kissing my girl?" Luke demanded, and Cole blinked. Rita felt surprised. She couldn't understand how the band was still playing with Luke standing right in front of her.

"I...I didn't know she was your girl," Cole stammered.

"Did you ask?"

"N-No..."

"Then you're stupider than I thought," Luke said, glaring at him. "Get out of my sight." Cole backed away and then disappeared into the crowd. Rita was hugging herself and feeling like an idiot.

"Thanks," she said. "I totally had it."

"I could tell," Luke retorted, pulling her back away from the crowd. "What part of no boys didn't you get?"

"I was just dancing," she insisted, feeling shaky inside from the close call of possibly being molested.

"Stay right here," Luke ordered, pushing her to sit down on the deck seat across from the band. She noticed a different guy was playing the guitar now, which explained how Luke was in two places at once.

"This sucks," she commented.

"You didn't have to come," he pointed out. She was going to respond when a very drunk girl came out and crashed into Luke, spilling her beer on him.

"Baby," she slurred. "How you doin'?" Luke couldn't even react before she planted one on his mouth. He pushed her back.

"You're smashed," he told her.

"Oh yeaaaa," she giggled. "Talk British to me! Hey! That should be a song!" Luke barely refrained from rolling his eyes as he angled her away from him and pushed her towards the other drunk people. She didn't even notice as she stumbled away. He growled in displeasure at getting soaked with alcohol.

"You're very popular," Rita noted.

"I don't even know her," Luke retorted.

"Sure you don't."

"I don't."

"I think you're lying."

"I'm not...you know what? I'm ready to go," he said, grabbing her arm and hauling her up again. She didn't even fight him as he pushed through the crowd to get back to the front of the house. Then, she decided to fight against him.

"I'm not," she said, pulling from his grasp. He turned to look at her, but she'd already melted into the crowd. She heard him shout her name as she slipped into a different room.

...

Luke was panicking. Lance would nail him to the wall by his ears if he let Rita get hurt at this stupid party. Seeing her getting mauled by some asshole had aggravated him to no end, getting kissed by a random drunk girl he didn't know had greatly annoyed him, and now she'd pulled a stunt and disappeared. This was not good.

"Rita!" he shouted again, trying to find her. He dodged the hands of girls as he went past. He recognized some of the kids from their high school, but they weren't ones he associated with. He'd only come because there were a few people he didn't mind hanging out with that he knew from the pool hall and played music with sometimes, but he knew he shouldn't have brought her. He went through the rooms, looking for Rita and feeling even more scared when he still couldn't find her.

"RITA!"

"She went upstairs, mate," someone told him, and he felt a stab of fear as he hurried to the stairs. She wouldn't be that ridiculous, would she? He booted open the doors as he went, making a few people shriek and swear at him afterwards. Rita was not up there. He came back down and paused halfway on the stairs to scan the room. He didn't see her at all. He spent more time going through the crowd all over the main floor again. He checked the basement and found it empty. He came back up and felt at a loss. What was he going to do? He went outside and looked for her there. Still nothing.

Feeling complete despair, he went to stand by his car to collect himself and figure out a new game plan on locating her.

Only to find her sitting in the passenger seat smirking at him through the windshield.

The instant relief was quickly replaced by aggravation and anger. He yanked open the driver door and got in, glaring at her.

"What took you so long?" she asked lightly.

"That was not funny," he said angrily.

"Oh, it was to me," she replied with a smile. He crammed his key into the ignition and started the car, unable to voice anything else back to her. Didn't she realize how scared she'd made him feel? Didn't she realize that he cared about her more than he should? He ground his jaw as he drove home.

"Are you just gonna give me the silent treatment now?" she asked after a while.

"You deserve it," he answered, not looking at her.

"Come on," she said. "You pull pranks on me all the time."

"You could have gotten hurt, Rita," he said quietly, "more than what already happened to you, and I don't ever like to see you hurt. You know that." He finally glanced at her, and she was watching him carefully.

"I'm sorry," she finally said. Luke just nodded, not saying anything else. When they got home, they got out of the car and walked towards the dark house. Lance was still out it seemed. Luke was thankful for that. He didn't feel like explaining why he was reeking of alcohol or why Rita had gone with him. He let Rita go inside first, and she went to get ready for bed while he put his coat in the washtub to soak and then sank down on the couch and tried to get his wits back about him.

...

Rita finally broke down and cried in the bathroom. Her first kiss had happened tonight, and it hadn't been at all what she'd imagined it would be. Who wanted to put their tongue in your mouth anyway? She didn't get it. She hugged her knees to her chest as she sat on the floor and kept crying. Even worse, Luke had witnessed the whole thing. It was all just so embarrassing.

"Rita?"

She gulped on her current sob, trying to be quiet. It was pointless since he knew she was in there already.

"Go away," she croaked. The door opened anyway, and he stood there with a hand covering his eyes.

"You decent?" he asked.

"I said go away," she said again.

"Yes or no?"

"I'm serious."

"So am I."

Rita growled in frustration, but she knew he wasn't going to go away. She wiped at her face quickly, attempting to get rid of some of the evidence of her feelings.

"I'm decent," she said finally, and he lowered his hand. Then he came to sit on the floor beside her, draping his arms over his knees.

"That was your first kiss wasn't it?" he asked without looking at her. She felt surprised, but she really shouldn't have been. He knew she hadn't dated anyone yet.

"Yes, and you rudely interrupted it," she said, going for humor. He didn't buy it.

"Why can't you just admit that you're hurting?" he asked, finally looking at her.

"Because if I do that, then I'm exposing myself to more hurt," she answered logically.

"Or," he said back slowly, "you actually get support from someone who gives a shit." She felt her throat tighten at this as she looked at him.

"Why would you give a shit about me?" she asked, needing to know the answer.

"It hurts that you even need to ask that," he answered.

"I'm serious," she went on. "Who am I to you? I'm just some girl you live with. I'm nobody important to you. You're gonna leave in a year or two, and I'll be some long forgotten memory someday. I'm nothing to you."

"Don't you ever say that," he said sharply, taking her aback. He surprised her further by shifting so that he was crouched in front of her and taking her hands in his tightly. "You are one of the most important things in my life, and like it or not, I care about you and what happens to you, so you're just gonna have to deal with that and talk to me or else I will forever annoy the shit out of you all day long every day."

Rita blinked, feeling the impact of that statement hit her chest. She could tell he was being serious.

"Okay," she said finally. "I'm sorry."

"What happened tonight was shit," he went on. "I didn't keep you from getting hurt, and that's on me."

"Stop," she said, taking a hand from his and putting it over his mouth to stop him from talking further. "You are not responsible for me. I made my own choice, and the consequences are mine and mine alone. Got it?" He nodded slowly, and she took her hand back, feeling a bit flushed inside from the feel of his lips against her palm. He rested his hands on her knees now, still looking at her.

"I still want to take it back," he said quietly.

"Me too, but that's not how it works," she replied. "You can't just relive a day to change and fix things to be the way you want them."

"If I wasn't me, I'd re-enact your first kiss with you because you deserve to have that moment," he said next. Rita felt her skin start to tingle at this. Was he serious?

"Maybe I want you to," she said, stunning herself with this statement. She felt his fingers grip her knees slightly tighter, and she wondered if he had been feeling it too, this thing that was between them that was more than friends. Was this his way of finally admitting it like she wanted? She knew he'd never act on it, though. He was 18. She hated that he was older than her.

"I can't," he finally said. She watched his face. He said he couldn't, but he didn't say he didn't want to. She dared to rest her hands over his on her knees, and for a moment, he left them there. Then he slid them out from under hers.

"You gonna be okay?"

"Yea," she answered, lying a little. She wasn't going to be okay. Having him reject her just now hadn't helped. She knew why he'd had to, though, which was what made it so much worse.

"Alright," he said, getting to his feet. "Thank you for talking to me."

"I'm sorry I made it weird," she said, turning her face to stop looking at him. She felt embarrassed all over again.

"Rita, look at me," he instructed, and she couldn't help but obey. "You didn't make it weird. I promise."

She nodded slowly, seeing that he was being honest. He gave her a small smile and offered his hand to pull her up. She accepted, and when she was on her feet, he surprised her by pulling her into a hug.

"Go easy on yourself," he said to her as he held her. "Life is hard enough." She almost started crying again when he let her go and gripped her shoulder to give it a slight shake.

"Can you teach me?" she asked.

"Teach you what?"

"Some self-defense?"

She could see him contemplating this. She really just wanted to be able to escape creepy people before they could hurt her.

"I'm not asking you to teach me how to fight," she added. "Just defend myself."

"Alright," he agreed. "I can do that."

"Thanks."

He nodded and gave a final pat on her shoulder before walking away. She hugged herself tightly, wishing with all of her heart that she was older than she was.

...

Lance came home to find Luke sitting on the front step with Copper's head on his lap, his fingers absently stroking the dog's head and ears. His trust for Luke had grown in the last year. He was well aware that Rita was punching that bag in the barn and had been for a while now, but there weren't any other indicators that she was learning other skills, and he was okay with his daughter knowing how to protect herself. Lance was almost finished training Luke; there were a few last things he was going to teach him, but he had a feeling that Luke's heart wasn't entirely into it anymore.

"Rough night?" he asked, joining Luke on the step.

"Nah," Luke answered. "Just thought I'd enjoy one of the last mild nights of the year."

"Fair enough."

"How about you?"

"Kenny kicked my ass," Lance chortled. "My wallet is a few hundred bucks lighter."

"Not your night then?"

"Apparently not." Lance rubbed his face with his hand absently. "How's Rita?"

"Good. Tired."

"Things going okay at school?"

"Yea."

Lance had a suspicion something had happened last year, but neither Rita nor Luke were telling him about it. He figured it couldn't be that serious if Luke was keeping it to himself and if the school hadn't contacted him about it. Lance would be pretty miffed if it was something major, though.

Copper moved over to get attention from him now, and Lance indulged. He'd grown fond of the dog more than he'd ever admit. He'd been reminded of the stray he'd played with as a child and tragically lost, so he'd never wanted a dog again. He knew it was going to hurt when Copper eventually died, but he decided he couldn't deny himself the pleasure of a dog's love if it was in front of him.

"Do you think my mother is dead?" Luke asked out of the blue, making Lance blink in surprise.

"I don't know." It was an honest answer. He really didn't.

"I'm pretty sure she went back to it," Luke went on, "the job. I think she made a deal, that I stay here protected if she goes back to work."

"It's a possibility." Lance knew Zeke; that was one of his favorite pastimes—ultimatums. He looked at Luke, sensing the boy knew something more than he was letting on, but how would he know for sure his mother was working again? Unless someone had told him? But who? It was a mystery.

"I really am grateful to you for letting me stay here," Luke finished, looking at Lance. "You don't know what that means to me."

"Well," Lance said, "you're like the son I never had, Luke. I mean that." He reached to rest his hand on Luke's shoulder and give it a slight shake. "I appreciate you being here."

The lad smiled and nodded, bowing his head slightly.

"Can you promise me something?" Lance asked.

"Anything."

"Make sure Rita doesn't get into any trouble at school. I've realized she's grown up a lot in the last year, and I'm sure it's been noticed."

"I will look out for her."

Lance studied Luke's face and wondered if he had noticed Rita in the last while. He knew it had to be hard not to. He was glad she had Bridget to do the girly shopping with. He knew he wouldn't last five minutes bra or panty shopping before getting embarrassed and running away. He'd noticed she wasn't really into "girly" clothes anyway. She preferred her overalls or a good pair of jeans with plaid or a t-shirt to anything dressy. He was quite alright with that. He knew when she started to dress up, he'd be beating off boys left, right, and center.

"Good," he said finally. "Thank you." He got to his feet then, feeling very tired suddenly. "Have a good night."

"You too."

Lance went inside, heading up to his room. He stopped outside of Rita's room, seeing she was asleep. He couldn't help himself and went in to look down at her for a moment. He remembered watching her sleep as a baby, an infant, and a toddler. She still looked so innocent when she was asleep. He smiled and bent to kiss the side of her head gently.

"I love you, kid," he whispered. Then he left, trying not to feel lonely as he crawled into his empty bed by himself, his hand resting on the place where Rosie used to be.

1995—October

Montana, U.S.

Luke left the school and walked to his car when he found a boy he recognized leaning against it. He felt surprise since he hadn't spoken much to this person, but they were civil to each other in the hallways of the school.

"Hey," he said cautiously.

"Nice car, man," the boy said, nodding at it. He had a bit darker complexion with black hair tightly curled to his head under his red bandana. His hands were tucked into his navy jacket; his black jeans bagging a little at the hips.

"Thanks."

"You race at all?"

"No," Luke answered, but he was feeling intrigued now. There was racing? Where was this?

"You wanna?" the boy asked. Luke contemplated this for a minute. Racing would mean extra cash. It was always handy to have extra cash.

"Alright," Luke agreed. The boy grinned and extended his hand to shake, which Luke did.

"Welcome to the club," the boy said. "I'm Gideon."

"Luke."

"I know who you are," Gideon said as they stopped shaking hands. "You've caused quite a stir in this school since the day you arrived, bro."

"What can I say? I don't take bullshit," Luke advised.

"I noticed," Gideon said, pushing off Luke's car now. He was fishing out something from his pocket now. Once he had it, he handed it to Luke. It was a card with an address on it.

"When?" Luke asked, looking up at him.

"This Friday night."

"What kind of racing?"

"Some drag. Some laps. Depends on traffic and cops."

"Alright. I'll be there."

"Cool," Gideon said with a smile. "I should warn you: Vince is there sometimes."

"That's fine." If anything, it would give Luke pleasure to beat Vince at something else.

"It's gonna be wicked," Gideon said, stuffing his hands back into his jacket pockets and starting to walk away. "Bring your girlfriend if you want."

Luke didn't correct him. Sometimes it was helpful for Rita to have him associated as her boyfriend. Guys left her alone. He never wanted anyone to hurt her, and after the whole Cole incident, he wasn't about to let something like that happen to her again.

"Sorry!" Rita called, running towards him with her bag barely over her shoulder. "I got hung up with Mrs. Lewis."

"Did she have a new book recommendation for you?" he asked, teasing. Mrs. Lewis was the librarian, and he knew how much time Rita spent talking to her.

"She had six. It was great," Rita said, not catching his teasing. She opened the passenger side door and got in. He got into the driver's side shortly after. Rita twisted back to the front after pushing her bag behind her seat. Luke started driving as she got comfortable in her seat.

"Not going to share?" he asked after a moment.

"Share what?" she questioned.

"The books?"

"You really want to know?" She lifted a brow at him.

"Yes." He looked at her briefly, seeing a small smile on her lips. Did she not know by now that whatever she was interested in, he wanted to know about? He wanted to know everything about her.

"Alright," she said. "The Guests of War trilogy by Kit Pearson, The Giver, Watership Down, and Sleepers. She warned me that I might not be ready for Sleepers, though."

"Why's that?"

"Just the content."

"I see." He couldn't help but feel curious about the content of this story now. He never told her, but he nicked her books when she was done reading them just to know what she was interested in. He couldn't help himself.

"You still haven't let me read Watership Down," she reminded him.

"You can have it as soon as we get home," he promised.

"I'll take care of it."

"I know you will."

Rita was jiggling her leg and looking like she was lost in her own thoughts for the time being. He wondered what was making her anxious. She only moved her leg like that when she was.

"Who was the guy talking to you?" she asked, breaking out of her reverie after a while.

"Gideon."

"What did he want?"

"Just saying hey," Luke answered vaguely. He didn't want Rita to know he was planning on racing his car. He knew she'd have a lot to say about it. He also didn't want her to tell Lance.

"Oh."

"Where was Bridget?" Luke asked, realizing she wasn't in the backseat carrying on about whoever she was dating that week. The girl moved around a lot.

"She went home with Adam to study," Rita replied.

"I thought she was into Josh?"

"Keep up, will you? That ended on the weekend."

"Oye," Luke said, giving his head a shake.

"I can't wait for Friday," Rita said, sighing.

"Why's that?"

"I'm just tired and want the extra hour of sleep," she explained.

"I can cover chores tonight if you want to head to bed early," he offered.

"It's okay. I'm not gonna leave you to do it by yourself," she said. "And I want to learn self-defense. You promised."

"I'll do it tonight then," he said, remembering he had promised her that after Cole. He knew she hadn't liked not being able to get out of his grip, not that she'd said it out loud. He mentally berated himself for not getting on this sooner. Things kept getting in the way, and he didn't want Lance to see him doing it and asking questions.

"Cool," Rita said, sounding happy. Luke smiled and rested his arm on the edge of his car window. It was these kinds of days that he never wanted to end.

...

Rita met Luke in the barn after dark and found him making a space. She hoped her father wouldn't come out and find them, but he was busy working on something in the house. She'd heard muttering and cursing from under the kitchen sink, so she imagined he was going to be a while. It didn't help that Copper kept sticking his face under the sink too as if he could help somehow but only succeeding at getting in the way and giving unwanted face washes.

"I'm ready," she said, stopping off to the side. Luke turned his head to look at her before gesturing for her to step closer, which she did.

"Let's talk pressure points," he started, holding out his arm. He rested a finger on the spot just above his elbow.

"What is that?" she asked.

"A spot that if struck or pressed hard on, it's more likely to give," he stated. "Hold out your arm." She obeyed, and he pressed two fingers on the same spot. She could feel what he meant just by that gesture.

"Huh," she said, intrigued.

"Grab my shoulders," he instructed. She did so, and he banged her pressure points quickly, but not too hard, with his fists, making her yelp and let him go instantly.

"Ow," she said, rubbing her arms. But she fully understood now.

"Always go for the pressure points if you can," Luke advised. "There are a few others." He showed her one by one, leaving her feeling stupid that she hadn't figured this out before.

"Okay," she said, "so do I get to practise on you?"

"Gently," he replied, sounding a little amused.

"Of course," she scoffed.

"I'll get you into some different holds, and you get out of them," he advised, moving to wrap an arm around her neck from behind and hold her tight against him. Rita felt panic even though she knew it wasn't real.

"I can't," she started.

"Yes, you can," he insisted. "Don't let panic kill your mind. Think, Rita. Take your time for now, but know you don't always have time in real life." She envisioned the spots in her mind, and then she reached to jab her fingers into his eyes. He let go instantly.

"Aha," she said, feeling confident.

"What else could you have done?" he asked.

"The hand?"

"If you could reach it, yea."

"The one above the knee?"

"Yea."

"Do another one," she ordered, getting into it and eager to prove herself. She appreciated that Luke didn't grow tired or impatient, that he just kept letting her practise until it was almost nine. They were both laughing by this point, but Rita couldn't help but feel a charge happening between them. She wondered if he could too. She knew what she was learning wasn't really a laughing matter, but she appreciated that he made it fun so as to make it more comfortable to learn.

"What's tomorrow's lesson?" she asked, walking beside him towards the house.

"You'll just have to wait and see," he replied, making her growl in infuriation. He smirked.

"Bloody hell," Lance said when they came inside. He was standing in the kitchen looking like he actually had gone to hell and back. "That damn sink almost didn't make it."

"Need a hand?" Luke asked, moving to assist. Rita tuned them out as they started to talk plumbing and such. She was still feeling giddy from all the touching and close contact she'd had with Luke. Who was she kidding? She wasn't able to stop her feelings for him. She just had to keep the lid on them for now. Maybe one day she'd get to tell him.

And maybe, just maybe, he'd tell her he felt the same way.

A Few Days Later

Luke pulled up to the crowd of teenagers and young adults. He parked and found Gideon, who was taking bets just like he'd hoped. He grinned upon seeing Luke.

"Yo! I was just telling everyone you were gonna whup some ass tonight," he said, and Luke couldn't help but grin back as he shook his hand.

"What do we got?" he asked, surveying the crowd.

"The street's pretty clear for now. One lap race. We'll go from there," Gideon advised. Luke nodded, pushing his hands into his coat pockets and noticing Vince glaring at him from across the way.

"He going?" Luke asked, nodding his head towards Vince. Gideon laughed.

"Of course. He doesn't sit anything out."

"Perfect."

"Go saddle up, bro. We'll start in ten."

Luke fist bumped Gideon and headed back to his car. He got lined up where he was supposed to go, and he had to admit that he liked the thrill this was giving him. When the flag was dropped, he shot forward, and nothing else ran through his mind other than where he was going and how fast he had to go to get there.

...

Rita looked up from her book when Luke came home. She was quite invested in Watership Down, if she was honest, and she was about halfway through already. Copper was resting with his head in her lap, snorting every so often as he slept. Rita kept peeking at the words written on the front, and she gathered Brendan was an important person to Luke. She wanted to ask him about it, but she also didn't want to pry.

"Where were you?" she asked as Luke hung up his coat. He had a permanent grin on his face.

"Just out with some guys from school," he answered, avoiding looking at her. Rita felt tense suddenly. Had he been out with a girl? Had they done something together? Was that why he looked so happy? Her heart sank to her the bottom of her stomach. She felt sick just picturing it. She swallowed.

"Oh," she said. He was oblivious to her hurt, so she just hunkered back down and pulled the book up in front of her face. Her heart was racing, though. If he was dating someone, that meant he didn't return her feelings, and she'd been very mistaken in thinking he felt the same way towards her.

And that felt like a thousand cuts.

1995—November

Time went by slowly. Rita went to school, worked some shifts at the library on the odd weekend, and did homework. When she wasn't doing either of those things, she was riding Willow, doing farm chores, or practising self-defense whenever Luke had time. Luke was kept busy by Kenny mostly, and he went to the odd party without Rita. She felt a bit put out that he wasn't taking her, but she understood she'd scared him enough last time to warrant him not doing it again. She had searched for evidence that he was dating someone, but he wasn't hanging around any girls at school, and she never noticed any perfume on him or anything. Maybe he really had just been hanging out with guys that night. She'd overheard someone bragging about drag racing or something recently, and she'd rolled her eyes. She never understood how boys were so into car racing.

Today, she was hanging out with Keira, who was seven now and full of energy. Lucy had entrusted her with Rita for the weekend, and Rita was more than happy to do it. It made her wish she had her own little sister.

"Come on!" Keira called, running now. Rita loped after her, feeling the cold in the air and wishing it was summer again. It was also lightly raining now, and she wanted to go inside. It had been a wetter week, which made everything dreary and dull.

"Hey, be careful!" Rita called out when Keira approached an old well.

"Cool!" she exclaimed, peering down into it. Before Rita could stop her, she'd hopped up on the edge.

"Keira, no. KEIRA!" she shrieked. Keira went from laughing to releasing a scream as she fell, and Rita's heart dropped. She ran to the well and looked only to find darkness.

"Keira?" she called. "Keira!"

"I'm okay. The rope slowed my fall."

Rita saw there was a rope attached, and she breathed a sigh of relief. What good, quick thinking on Keira's part to grab it on her way down. It irked her that this well was even out here uncovered.

"Okay. Let me think for a minute."

"Please get me out. It's cold down here."

Rita couldn't stop feeling afraid. She didn't know what to do. Keira was starting to panic and cry down there, and Rita just wanted to ease her suffering. Luke wasn't home yet, Kenny was off with her father hunting, and Lucy was at her sister's for the night. Bridget was out with new guy Jake. Rita had no one to call, so she did the only thing she could think of.

"Keira?" she called. She examined the rope. It had broken during the fall, so it was useless. She had to get more.

"I'm scared," Keira said back. "There's water down here."

"I know, sweetheart," Rita replied, feeling a bit panicked now. Water? She didn't do well with water. Damn all that recent rain filling up the well! "I'm gonna go get some better rope, and I'm gonna come back and get you out, okay?"

"Please don't leave me."

"I have to if I'm gonna get you out," Rita said. "I'm coming back, Keira. I promise. Can you be strong for me?"

"Y-Yes."

"Good girl," Rita told her. "I'll be right back."

"Please hurry."

Rita turned and sprinted to Kenny's, which was the closest to her. She raced into the barn and began searching for rope. She found some that was long enough, and she sprinted back. She could hear Keira crying as she got closer.

"Hey! Keira, I'm back," Rita called, leaning her hands on the edge of the well and looking down into the darkness. "I'm here."

"It hurts," Keira whimpered, and Rita swallowed. She didn't know what kind of injuries Keira had, but she hoped they weren't major.

"If I send down the rope, can you loop it around yourself and climb out while I pull?"

"I can't really move my arm," Keira replied. Rita clenched her jaw. That meant she had to go down there, and it gave her a lot of anxiety. She didn't think she could handle it, but she knew she had to for Keira. She tied the rope around the wooden frame on the well and knotted it tightly. She took in some deep breaths. Rita did not do well with tight spaces, and this well was not a big one. It was enough for two people to stand in, but it was very snug. She heard Copper barking and saw the dog rushing towards her.

"How did you get out?" she asked when he ran up to her and wiggled his tail eagerly for pats. "Copper, you gotta stay put."

"Send him home like Lassie," Keira suggested.

"He's not quite that smart," Rita replied. Copper gave her a goofy smile in return, tongue lolling. "Stay here, boy." If all else failed, he could at least bark and alert someone to their whereabouts. His baying was loud after all. She breathed hard a few times again and then climbed up the ledge and began rappelling down. She went slowly to the bottom and found the ground not long after. She was waist deep in water, though. If it had been any higher, she would have been having panic attacks of her own. Obviously this well had been filled, but the recent rain had filled it up a bit.

"You came," Keira said, sniffling hard. Rita pulled the girl into a hug, earning a cry of pain in return.

"Where does it hurt?" she asked, trying to feel in the dark.

"My shoulder. I also hit my head a little."

"Well, I think you'd be a lot worse off if you hadn't grabbed that rope," Rita told her, rubbing her non-injured arm. "You're cold, sweetie."

"I know," Keira said, her teeth chattering a little. It was cold down there. Rita was feeling it in her bones already.

"Okay," she said. "You're gonna climb onto my back and hang on tight. Then I'm getting us out of here."

"The rope will hold?"

"It will," Rita answered, hoping she wasn't lying. She helped Keira onto her back, trying to ground herself as well because the claustrophobia was starting to kick in.

"You good?" she asked.

"I'm good," Keira answered. Her good arm was tight around Rita's neck. Thunder rumbled above, and Rita swallowed. She didn't want to be stuck down here in a rainstorm.

"Okay. Here we go," she said, starting to climb. She made it up a few feet when the structure the rope was tied to broke. Keira screamed, and Rita scrabbled at the stone to slow her fall but failed. Her feet stung when she hit the ground, and she groaned in pain. A piece of the structure had fallen down and struck her in the side too.

"Rita? Rita! Are you okay? Oh, Rita," Keira was saying, fretting.

"I'm okay," Rita gasped through the pain. "I'm okay."

"What're we gonna do?!"

Rita looked up just as the rain started to fall harder, and she had no idea how to even answer that question. The structure was hovering, and she worried it was going to fall on them. She couldn't dodge that much. She could hear Copper whining and barking softly.

"Copper!" she shouted. "Go get Luke!" Surely he'd be back by now. She prayed he was.

"Get Luke, Copper!" Keira shouted too. The two of them kept shouting this for a bit, but the dog was still up there, not listening and just whining with anxiety.

"Alright," Rita said. "Let's give it a rest for a moment."

"No one knows we're down here," Keira said, her voice small. "What if we drown?"

"We're not gonna drown," Rita promised, her chest feeling tight. If it rained hard and fast, though, she didn't want to think about what could happen. She shivered from the cold, and Keira squeezed her tighter. Rita was struggling to breathe, but she stayed as calm as she could.

Eventually, Luke would come looking for her. She was sure of it.

...

Luke entered the house with a shake of his head and stamp of his shoes. It was definitely fall out there leading into winter, and a storm was rolling through...probably one of the last ones of the year. He whistled for Copper as he went to the kitchen. When the dog did not come running, he frowned.

"Rita?" he called. "You here?"

No answer. Then he saw the back door not entirely shut, and he knew Copper had escaped. He sighed. Rita was probably out looking for him.

"Back out we go," he muttered, grabbing a dry coat and shoving his boots on this time before going back outside. The rain was hard now, and he pulled up his hood to keep as dry as possible.

"Rita!" he called. "Just leave him! He'll come back when he's hungry!"

She still didn't answer, and he was starting to feel a little bit anxious. Then he remembered she was supposed to be babysitting Keira overnight for Lucy. He made his way to Lucy's house on foot only to find it empty too, the door unlocked.

"I don't like this," Luke said out loud, turning to scan the yard. Where the hell were they? Thunder cracked again. Then, he faintly heard baying, and his skin prickled. Copper. He took off towards the sound, slipping and sliding on the mud and almost falling at times. He found his dog pacing and barking and whining around an old well.

"Copper, what're you doing?" he asked when the dog rushed to him before he got to it. "Come on then." He tried to pull him away, but the dog fought him back, pulling to return to the well. Luke turned his head to look at it.

No...

He walked the remaining ten feet towards it and leaned over the edge, but he couldn't see anything.

"Rita?" he called.

"Present," she answered.

"What the bloody hell are you doing down there?!"

"She was trying to get me out," Keira answered.

"Ah, geez," Luke groaned, pressing a hand to his face momentarily. "What happened?"

"The thing I had the rope tied to broke," Rita replied. He surveyed it, noticing it could fall down on them. He worked to move it, succeeding in doing so after about ten minutes.

"Thank you," Rita said, sounding relieved.

"Alright. I'll be back with more rope," he said.

"Leave a note at least, so someone knows where we are if you fall down here too," Rita suggested.

"Alright. Hang on."

"Of course."

He rushed home, left a note, and came back. He was cold, so he knew they would be even more so. He shone the flashlight down to see them, having thought to grab one. Rita squinted back up at him. The water was just past her waist he noticed. She was holding Keira in her arms, trying to keep her out of the water as much as possible. He knew how much water scared her, and he knew she was holding on for the sake of Keira right now, that she was probably losing her mind with anxiety inside. He suddenly felt an intense feeling, looking at her in this moment. There was only one thing it could be, and it hit him hard. It was love. He loved her. He then realized that no matter the status of their relationship, it would kill him to lose her.

"I'm sending this down. Put it around Keira, and I'll pull her up," Luke instructed, trying to keep the emotion out of his voice.

"What if it lets go again?" Keira asked, sounding scared.

"I'll be here to break your fall," Rita promised around chattering teeth, trying to make light of it. He could sense her anxiety in her tone, though.

"It won't," Luke promised. He lowered the loop quickly, and he felt Rita grab it. After a moment, she gave it a tug.

"All set," she said. Luke started to pull, thankful that Keira was so light. When she got to the top, he grabbed her by the back of the coat and hauled her out. She was shaking and shivering; he didn't even think twice before taking off his coat and putting it on her and pulling the hood up over her head. It almost swallowed her entire head whole.

"Thanks, Luke," she whispered, tilting her head back so she could see him from under the hood. "Please rescue Rita."

"I'm on it," he promised. He lowered the loop again, feeling the rain driving into him like ice pellets. It kept getting harder each second it seemed. He felt Rita pull the loop over her. He started to pull her up carefully. Keira was holding her arm as she stood next to him, whimpering at the lightning and thunder when it happened. Copper was still pacing nervously. Luke felt every muscle straining, but he didn't care. He'd die for Rita.

"I got it," Rita said, catching a hold of the stone edge. Luke lessened the slack a little, getting ready to reach for her when the stone she was holding onto gave way. She shrieked and dropped, but Luke was faster. He caught her hand, his stomach digging into the stone. Despite the situation, he almost laughed as he felt Keira grab the back of his pants with her hand to stop him from toppling over.

"Oh my God," Rita said, her feet scuffing against the wall to get a proper hold on it.

"I got you," Luke promised. He reached down with his other hand, and she grabbed it. She walked up the wall as he pulled. He hauled her up over the edge where she lost her balance, landing on him and knocking them both down onto the ground. Keira jumped out of the way to avoid getting landed on. Luke's arms instinctively went around Rita as she lay there breathing hard on top of him.

"I can't...I can't breathe," she said. Luke moved his hands to cup her face, making her look at him.

"You are breathing," he told her. "You're okay." He could feel her teeth chattering, and the coldness of her body was seeping onto him. He had to get her out of there.

"Rita?" Keira asked, sounding worried.

"I'm okay," Rita answered, turning her head to look at her. She could barely move from the cold, so Luke helped her get back on her feet. He eventually just lifted her up into his arms to carry her as Keira trotted alongside him to keep up. Copper kept running ahead and then rushing back, sniffing and nosing them all anxiously while whining.

Rita's eyes were closed as her face pressed against Luke's chest. He was worried about hypothermia. Keira seemed alright, but she had his big coat on to keep her warm and dry, and Rita had kept most of her out of the water while down in the well. Luke took her inside to the front of the fire, setting her down and taking her wet coat and boots off. He went to get towels and her thickest sweatshirt and track pants. Keira was sitting there watching, shivering slightly.

"Go to Rita's room and get warm clothes," he instructed, handing her a towel to dry off with. "Then wrap up in blankets, alright?"

"Okay."

Once she was gone, Luke turned his attention back to Rita. He had to be careful here, but he needed her to start getting warm. He ignored his own chill, his adrenaline pumping and keeping him going for now.

"You still with me, Rita?" he asked, crouching down next to her and putting a hand on her forehead. She felt chilly to him. She opened her eyes slowly, looking at him.

"Mmhmm," she answered.

"We need to get you into warmer clothes," he went on. "Are you able to do it?"

"I can...try."

"I'll cover you with this," he said, draping the big towel over her.

"Thanks," she said sleepily. She managed to get her long sleeve shirt off, but she was shaking a bit harder at this point to dry herself off.

"Please don't take this the wrong way," Luke said.

"I won't," she promised. He gently dried off her arms, sides, and torso with the towel, avoiding her front with the towel and his eyes. When he deemed her dry enough, he pulled her sweatshirt over her head. She tucked her arms under it but didn't put them through the sleeves yet. He could see her working at something.

"You okay?" he asked.

"I need help," she answered. He looked at her, unsure what she needed help with. She rolled her eyes and slowly turned over to expose her back.

"Oh," he said, going scarlet in the face and feeling stupid. He unclipped her bra, his hands shaking slightly and not from the cold, and she reached under her sweatshirt to pull it out and rested it on the floor. Then she pushed her arms through the sleeves.

"Thanks, Luke," she murmured.

"Feel better?" he asked.

"A little. My side hurts."

"Where?"

"Right side."

"Show me." Modesty be damned. Luke wasn't about to let her have something life threatening and leave it unchecked. She lifted her shirt to reveal a bruise on her right side. "What happened?" He pressed lightly, checking for broken ribs. She grunted slightly from pain, but he didn't feel anything broken.

"A piece of that structure fell when it broke and landed on me."

Luke ground his jaw a little. She was definitely going to the hospital now. He took his hand back, and she pulled her sweatshirt down again.

"Are you able to finish the rest?" he asked.

"I'll try," she replied. She took her socks off and unsnapped her jeans and pushed them down under the towel. She lost strength after a moment, still shivering, so he tugged from her ankles and pulled them off. He dried her legs carefully. He turned away to let her remove her underwear and dry off. He felt his face get red again. He hadn't thought to get her dry undergarments. She managed to pull the sweat pants on and then curled into a fetal position before he turned back.

"You okay?" he asked, resting a hand on her forehead again. She was about the same but not worse, which was good.

"I think so," she answered. He got up and grabbed the afghan from the couch, going back to wrap it around her snugly. He took the towel and tried to dry her hair as best as he could. Then he left her and went to check on Keira.

"You alright in there?" he asked.

"Yes," she answered after opening the door.

"Okay," he said. "Go hang out with Rita, okay? I'll get the fire going better." Keira nodded, and he noticed she didn't have an arm through the sleeve. He went to change quickly and dry off himself since he was sopping wet, intending to ask her about it after. He felt cold, but he knew he was fine. When he returned to the living room, Keira was babying the arm under the shirt.

"What's wrong?" he asked.

"My shoulder," she answered. "It's getting worse. And I have a headache."

"Why didn't you tell me you were hurt?" he inquired, feeling alarmed.

"It was tolerable, and Rita needed to get warm," she answered. She was such an empathetic child for her age; it made his heart hurt sometimes knowing she put herself last already. Luke remembered the hair dryer then, and knew that would work wonders.

"Once she's warmed up, we're taking you to the hospital," he said to Keira, moving to go get it.

"What about Rita?"

"Her too." Regardless of her starting to warm up, he wanted to ensure she was alright. He plugged the hair dryer in and set to work drying Rita's hair. Keira sat on the floor next to her, and Rita smiled and reached to hold her hand.

"I'm alright," she promised once Luke was finished. He could tell she was warming up, but he still felt concerned.

"It's my fault," Keira started.

"It could have happened to anyone," Rita interrupted. "How is your shoulder?"

"Not good."

"I'm taking her in," Luke said. "You're coming too."

"I'm fine," Rita insisted.

"No arguing," he countered, looking at her and feeling angst and other emotions. Keira moved to lie next to her on the floor and cuddle against her. Without really thinking about it, he moved to hold her from behind. If Lance came home to find this, he'd have a million questions.

"A Rita sandwich," Keira said now with a giggle, and Rita started to laugh a little as well. "Is it working?"

"Yea, it is," Rita answered. Luke's face was near her neck, and he felt his pulse quicken. When she twisted her head to look at him, their faces were close together. Luke wondered if she could see it in his eyes...his love for her.

"Thanks, Luke," she said, and he nodded. She tucked back down, her shivers slowly stopping with time. When she declared she felt warmer, he let her go and got up, helping her get to her feet.

"Come on, you two," he said. "We're going." They both grumbled, but they obliged.

"Wait," Rita said by the door. "I can't go in there like...like this." She gave Luke a look, and he understood. He slightly flushed again.

"Sorry," he said.

"It's fine," she replied. "I'll be back." She went to her room slowly, and he helped Keira get one of Rita's coats on. Rita returned after a moment and put a coat on herself. Once they were in Luke's car, he breathed a little easier. They were conscious and alive. That was a plus.

He just hoped Lance didn't hurt him too bad when he got home and found out what had happened.

...

Rita was checked over, revealed to have a slightly normal temperature but nothing dangerous and have nothing broken, thankfully, and was deemed well enough to return home. Keira's arm was put in a sling, having fractured her arm from the fall. They advised she had a small concussion and to keep an eye on it. Rita had to admit that Keira had extremely strong pain tolerance considering. She felt bad for not stopping her faster to avoid having this whole thing happen. She'd called Lucy from the hospital so the doctor could speak with her and understand as to why Rita was there and not Lucy. Rita had felt bad telling Lucy over the phone, and Lucy had gotten upset but had thanked Rita all the same for doing everything she'd done and told her she'd be returning home as soon as possible. She'd thanked Luke too.

Rita was in the hallway with Luke waiting for the doctor to finish with Keira, and she couldn't stop thinking about what he'd done for her earlier. He was having a hard time looking at her, so she wondered if he was thinking about it too.

"Hey," she said softly, finally making him look at her. "Thank you."

"Of course," he replied. She moved closer to him, watching as he regarded her with a wary expression. She wrapped her arms around him, and he hugged her back, his one hand on her waist and his other holding the back of her head.

I love you. It was on the tip of her tongue. She felt the strong pull to say it in this moment, and yet she knew she couldn't. Instead, she pulled back and looked into his eyes for a moment. To her pleasure, there was something there that indicated he might be feeling the same way. She'd seen it earlier too; it hadn't been her imagination. She rested a hand on his right cheek while moving her lips to press into his left one softly. She slid her hand down his neck to rest on his chest, keeping her head pressed against his for as long as she dared. Then she stepped away, turning to see Keira walking out in her sling with the doctor beside her.

"How mad do you think Nina is gonna be?" Keira asked.

"She might be mad at first, but then she'll be really glad you're okay," Rita answered, taking Keira's hand and walking with her down the hall. She hadn't been able to tell if Lucy was mad or not. She had been too busy being worried and alarmed. Luke fell into step next to her, but she couldn't look at him. She didn't want to see the expression on his face because if it was one of longing, she knew she wouldn't be able to hold back.

...

Luke had almost said the three words out loud. He almost told her he loved her. The way she was looking at him, he was pretty confident she was thinking the same thing.

But she was 15. There was no way he could tell her even if he wanted to.

He felt her lips against his cheek the whole drive home. He barely heard Keira talking in the back about how jealous her classmates were going to be of her sling. He stole looks at Rita, who would meet his eyes every so often and send shivers down his spine.

If only things were different. He rested his elbow on the car door and rested his fingers against his lips, sliding them back and forth slowly as he drove.

...

Rita tucked Keira into her bed that night after Keira asked to stay there instead of at Lucy's house. Lucy was coming home early the next morning on the first available flight, assured by Rita that Keira was okay and safe for the night.

Now, she was sitting on the couch beside Luke, the afghan covering her for warmth. He'd just stoked the fire, so it was crackling and popping behind the glass. Neither of them talked about what had happened. He was watching a rerun episode of Family Feud, which Rita couldn't help but make guesses at.

"And just what is a snuffle?" he asked, teasing.

"I meant sniffle!" she exclaimed, elbowing him in the ribs.

"Sure you did."

She rolled her eyes and pulled her knees tighter to her chest as she continued to watch. She could feel Luke's arm beside hers, emanating heat and making her feel tingles all over. Without really thinking too much of it, she moved her hand to touch his. When he didn't pull away, she slid her fingers through his, feeling his palm against hers. His pulse was strong, and she felt it go a little faster at her touch. She leaned her head on his shoulder next, closing her eyes after a while. Just as she was on the cusp of falling asleep, she felt him kiss the top of her head.

She smiled.

...

Lance came home to find Luke and Rita on the couch together. Rita was leaning on Luke, and both of them were asleep. Lance was cold and wet and sore from hauling his catch around. Kenny had offered to clean it, so he'd let him. He shrugged off his coat, kicked off his boots, and walked slowly over to the two teenagers. He felt confused. Wasn't Rita supposed to be babysitting Keira at Lucy's place tonight? He couldn't quite tell because the afghan was covering them, but it almost looked like they were holding hands.

What the bloody hell was going on around here?

Lance reached to cuff the back of Luke's head, and the boy was instantly awake.

"Lance," he said, clearing the sleep from his throat. "How was hunting?"

"Fine," Lance said. "I still have a very accurate shot." His warning was clear, and he knew Luke recognized it.

"Rita and Keira had an accident," Luke said slowly and quietly. "Keira's sleeping in Rita's room. Rita fell asleep on me, and I...I didn't want to move. She was so tired."

"What accident?" Lance asked, alarmed. Rita appeared to be okay, but looks could be deceiving.

"Just...hang on," Luke said, shifting. He got out from under Rita and gently lowered her onto her side on the couch. She shifted without waking up, and Luke fixed the afghan so it was covering her feet. Lance watched this and noticed how affectionate this action was. It didn't make him feel good at all.

They moved to the kitchen to speak more freely. Luke explained about Keira falling down the well just a little ways from Kenny's property and Rita trying to get her out and failing. Lance felt chills at this story, thinking about how so many things could have gone wrong.

"And that's it," Luke finished. "Everyone's okay for now. Lucy is coming back in the morning."

"Good." He looked at the boy and held his gaze. "You're still holding up your end of the deal, right?"

"Of course," Luke answered quickly.

"She's everything to me," Lance went on, tilting his head in the direction of Rita.

"I understand."

"Thanks for looking after her," he said a little reluctantly.

"You can trust me to always look after her," Luke promised.

"I know." He ran a hand over his hair and turned to go up to his room to unload before having a shower. He heard Luke turn off the TV and walk to his room a moment later. Lance sank down on his bed and sighed heavily. He had this niggling feeling that despite what Luke had said tonight, he was falling in love with Rita.

1995—Late November

Lance was cleaning up after dinner while Luke fed Copper and got ready to do the chores outside. Rita was out with Bridget at a movie, and Luke was to pick her up when it was over. Something in his gut didn't feel right, though, and even though he did his best to ignore that feeling and his thoughts about it, it wouldn't leave him alone.

Once finished with the chores, he gave Willow a final pat for the night and ruffled Hank's ears on his way by. He shut the lights off and pulled the door closed behind him. It was just after eight, and he decided he was going to go into town early.

"You going out?" Lance asked, noticing when he grabbed his keys.

"Yea. I'm gonna meet up with a few guys and then pick up Rita," Luke answered.

"Alright."

Luke didn't tell Lance about his bad feeling. He didn't want to unnecessarily worry him if he didn't have to.

...

Rita was not having a good time at this party. She had been hesitant to go in the first place and couldn't stop hearing Luke's voice as a warning in her head about it despite him not even knowing she was there, but Bridget had wheedled and begged, so she'd caved and went. They had to be out of there and back to the theatre by 9:15, though, and Rita was worried they wouldn't make it.

"Bridge, come on," she said, tugging at her friend's arm. "We should go."

"Buzz kill," Bridget snorted. "It's not even eight thirty!"

"I just don't have a good vibe about this," Rita tried.

"Then go sit in the corner and be dull," Bridget said, rolling her eyes. Rita gritted her teeth. They were a couple of months away from being 16, but she hated that Bridget acted like an 18 year old and treated Rita like a 13 year old.

She walked away, trying to clear her head. She kept an eye on the clock nervously. She knew Luke was punctual if not early, so she knew he'd be waiting outside the theatre by nine. She didn't want to piss him off.

She saw Bridget shrieking and carrying on with people as she passed by Rita. Five minutes later, Rita saw Bridget heading to the stairs with a boy, and her heart stopped.

"Bridget!" she shouted, but her friend couldn't hear her.

"Hey, hot stuff," a guy said, approaching her.

"No thank you," Rita said, trying to move past. He caught her hand, though.

"Whoa!" he exclaimed. "I don't bite. I just wanted to get to know you."

"I'm good."

"We go to the same school," he laughed. "You're Rita, right?"

"Yea..."

"I'm Trevor."

"Okay, so we've officially met," Rita said. "I need to get to my friend..."

"Ah, she's fine," Trevor dismissed. "Come on, let's dance."

"No, I..." She got pulled along anyway. She lost sight of Bridget. She wasn't about to have a repeat of the whole Cole incident, so once Trevor let her hand go, she took off.

"Rita!" he shouted after her. She didn't care. She needed to know where Bridget was. She pushed through the crowd, searching. She yelped when Trevor got a hold of her again.

"You're slippery," he said, smirking. "But I'm faster."

"Let go," she ordered. He pushed her against the wall instead, resting his face next to her ear.

"Is it true that you offer a good time?"

That stupid rumor. Rita hated that it was still out there. She didn't have time for this, so she went for his pressure points by his elbows, stomped on his left foot, and jabbed his throat with her fingers. He cried out and let her go, and she hurried away before he came back to his senses.

She panicked when she couldn't find Bridget. She had no idea how to get help. Then, she realized what she could try. She went to the master bedroom and locked the door behind her. She picked up the landline and dialed.

...

Luke was drumming his fingers on the steering wheel as he sat outside the theatre waiting. His gut was getting even more concerned the longer he sat there. People were trickling out just after nine, and Rita was not one of them.

"Shit," he muttered. Bridget probably talked her into doing something stupid. He really didn't like that girl. He was about to go when a man jogged out of the theatre and hurried towards him. He rolled down his window as the man approached.

"Are you Luke?" the guy asked.

"Yea?"

"Rita said to come to this address," he said, handing Luke a folded piece of paper. "She said it's urgent and that she's hiding in the master bedroom upstairs."

"Thanks," Luke said, starting his car and throwing it in gear. He drove quickly, getting to the address in about ten minutes and feeling a little bit scared. He parked and got out, wondering just what the hell was going on. The house was rocking and rolling with loud music and intoxicated teenagers/young adults. He got inside and went for the stairs, pushing through crowds of people. He knocked on a few doors and called out her name before one was yanked open and Rita herself was standing there looking freaked out.

"Luke," she practically gasped.

"What the hell is going on?" he demanded. She grabbed his shirt and hauled him inside before closing the door again. "Rita!"

"I can't find Bridget," she said. "I mean, there are a few locked doors up here, but I can't get into them. I think...I think someone is...is hurting her."

"Shit, Rita," Luke said angrily. "What are you even doing here?!"

"It was her stupid idea, and I agreed to half an hour, but you know Bridget," Rita replied, frustrated. "I'm sorry."

"Come on," he said, heading back out to the hall. Rita followed him closely as he started trying doors. Ones that were locked got kicked in, and Luke made her wait in the doorway while he went in to accost the couple that was inside. On the second try, he found Bridget, but he was too late. She was curled in a ball crying alone.

"Bridget," Rita said, pushing past Luke and going over to her. Luke clenched and unclenched his fists as he watched.

"It hurts," Bridget whimpered, and Rita gathered her friend up in her arms to hold her close as she cried harder.

"Where is he?" Luke asked.

"He's gone," Bridget answered in a whisper through her tears. "I...I really thought he'd stop..."

Luke met Rita's eyes, and she looked pained.

"What do we do?" she asked him.

"Nothing," Bridget cut in sharply, pushing back from her. "We do nothing."

"He's not getting away with it," Luke advised. "So tell me who he is, and I'll deal with him."

"I don't need you to save the day, Luke!" Bridget yelled at him, getting up now. The collar of her shirt was torn, and her mascara was running down her cheeks from her tears. Luke could also see the finger marks on her neck.

"He can't just get away with this," Rita insisted.

"I asked for it, okay?" Bridget said loudly, glaring at her. "I led him on. I deserve what I got. Don't you get it? No one will believe me that I didn't want it. They'll believe him."

"We believe you," Rita tried.

"Just drop it! I wanna go home," Bridget said, her voice wavering slightly near the end. She walked past Luke and headed out. Rita hurried after her with Luke bringing up the rear. The party was still in full swing, and Luke wanted to get revenge somehow, so he found the landline in the kitchen and called in the party to the cops. Then he met Rita and Bridget at his car and took her home.

...

Rita's mind was racing after they dropped Bridget off. She felt terrible for her friend. She didn't know how to help or what to do, and the worst part was that it was bringing back up stuff for her that she'd thought she'd dealt with a long time ago. Cole's stunt hadn't been enough to do it apparently, but this did.

"You okay?" Luke asked after a while.

"I'm just thinking about Bridget," she answered.

"Why would you go along with that?" he asked, sounding angry now. She turned her head to look at him.

"You're seriously mad? You took me to a party not that long ago!"

"Yea, with me," he said, looking at her quickly. "I was there to keep an eye on you."

"Well, you did a shit job of it," she retorted, and she yelped when he hit the brakes and pulled over. She felt slightly afraid when he parked and turned to face her, a bit of anger in his expression. Then he softened.

"That was uncalled for," he said quietly. "You don't think I feel like shit every day because of that?"

"I didn't mean anything by it," she said. "I'm just mad."

"Don't say things you don't mean," he told her. "It only hurts people."

"I'm sorry."

She saw the fear on his face and knew that she'd scared him tonight. She felt bad all over again.

"That could have been you," he said next.

"I know."

"It would have really broken my heart if it had happened to you," he went on. "It hurts that it happened to Bridget. It shouldn't happen to anybody."

"I won't go to anymore parties," she said. "Okay?"

"I never said that. Just...be smart about it and have a plan for when it goes south."

"Okay."

He turned back and started to drive again, and Rita felt some tears slip out of her eyes as she thought about how she had failed to keep Bridget safe. Now she knew how Luke felt.

...

Luke watched Rita try to talk to Bridget the next few days at school, but Bridget wasn't having any of it. She avoided Rita like the plague, and this left Rita a bit depressed and disgruntled. Luke didn't want to admit it, but the whole thing made him lose sleep. He kept nightmaring that it had been Rita who'd been raped instead, and he'd wake up thrashing and panicking with Copper sticking his snout into his face and trying to comfort him with a face wash.

"She'll come around," Luke said to Rita now, and she gave half a shrug in response. He was eyeing up this Trevor guy across the room now, the guy Rita had said tried to stop her from finding Bridget. He'd learned he was Vince's younger brother, and Luke realized this kid had never been on his radar before despite being at this school for as long as Rita. He had a bad feeling about him, and he figured time would tell before Trevor grew worse.

"Yo, 'sup?" Gideon asked, coming up to him. Luke almost had a panic attack. If Gideon brought up racing in front of Rita, he was so screwed.

"Hey," Luke replied, fist bumping him. Rita eyed them both, looking confused. He knew why. She'd never seen him hanging around Gideon before.

"This your girl?" Gideon asked, looking at Rita now. Luke caught the pink in her cheeks as she registered what Gideon meant.

"Yea," Luke answered, meeting her eyes with his. "Rita." He knew his reason for letting on they were together; he wondered if she understood it.

"Gideon. Nice to meet you," Gideon said to her.

"You too," Rita murmured.

"We're all set for Friday night. Last one of the season before snowfall. You coming?"

"Yea," Luke answered, feeling nervous. Don't ask, don't ask, don't ask...

"What's Friday night?" Rita asked, and he groaned inside.

"Your boy is quite the racer," Gideon said with a chuckle. "He's won the last three. I'm surprised Vince hasn't attacked you yet."

"Racer?" Rita asked, sounding confused.

"I'll be in touch," Luke said to Gideon, who realized he'd let something slip about Luke to Rita and made an apologetic face.

"Yea, sure," he agreed. He slapped Luke's back in a friendly way before walking off to join his group of buddies. Rita was staring at Luke now.

"What?" he asked.

"Racer of what?" she inquired.

"Nothing."

"Luke, don't lie to me," she said, giving him a look. "We don't do that to each other, remember?"

"I know." Except when it came to telling her how he felt about her. He could never say that out loud.

"So what is he talking about?"

Luke heaved a sigh, knowing he couldn't keep it from her any longer. He hoped she wouldn't get too mad at him.

"I may or may not be involved in some car racing," he answered, and both her eyebrows shot up high.

"What?!"

"It's no big deal..."

"Luke, people die racing cars," Rita cut him off. "Why would you do that?"

"It's fun, and I make a lot of money." He left out the thrill it gave him as well as the fun he had with Gideon afterwards. Riding around in his car with the music so loud it vibrated his entire body was something he had fun doing sometimes.

"Well, I think it's stupid, and you're stupid for doing it," she said aggressively, standing up abruptly. Luke was aware that it was her time of the month and it made her a bit more cranky than usual. He'd caught onto that before too long after moving in. It wasn't hard, especially when she got extra weepy and angry at nothing for a few days, which he did not envy and felt bad about it, really. He knew this whole thing with Bridget was accentuating things, though.

"Rita," he tried.

"Just leave me alone," she ordered, gathering her stuff and walking away. Luke sighed as he rested his elbows onto the table and pressed his forehead into his folded hands.

...

Rita was hurting. She missed Bridget, even though her friend could annoy her at times. She just wanted things to go back to the way they were before they'd gone to that stupid party. She floated through the rest of the school day and found Luke waiting for her in the parking lot. Her stomach clenched at the image of him racing that car. She feared it would kill him, and she couldn't live without him. She was slowly discovering that.

She didn't talk to him for the entire drive. Once they were home, she got out and didn't look back.

"Rita," Luke called after her. "Hey!" She heard him jog to catch her, and she turned when he got closer before he could catch her by the arm.

"What?" she asked, trying to sound annoyed.

"I know what I'm doing, okay?" he said. "Trust me."

She hated how easily she trusted him. He was one of the few people she did trust, and she knew that if he was doing this car racing thing, he would be doing it as carefully as he could. It was the other drivers she didn't trust, especially Vince. She hadn't liked hearing that he was a part of this crowd.

"Fine," she said.

"And please don't tell your dad," he added. "I don't need him to worry about it."

"What do I tell him if you die in a race?"

"I think it'd be okay to tell him at that point," Luke said, teasing in his tone. She pressed her lips together, refusing to smile or laugh at this.

"Fine, but I still think you're being stupid."

"Do you still think that after hearing I make up to 500 bucks each time?" he questioned, and she hated that she felt a bit impressed.

"Good for you, but I don't think it's worth risking your life for." She watched as something in his eyes shifted, and he cleared his throat.

"Well, sometimes we do things that no one else does in order to get the job done," he said.

"What the hell does that have to do with racing?" she asked, confused.

"Nevermind," he said. "Just...don't worry about me, alright?"

"Fine. Can I go in now?"

"Yea."

She gave a shake of her head before going inside. She greeted Copper and hung up her bag after pulling out her textbooks. She had a test to study for, and it took her mind off of everything else for a while, which was a welcome change.

She did her very best to not picture Luke dead in a ditch somewhere, because that just hurt way too damn much.