There's a Hero in You by Tommee Profitt

Ambulance Movie Score Suite by Lorne Balfe

Make Believe by Memphis May Fire (feels like this one was almost written for Rita!)

2020

Verdun

Reset 214

Rita felt nervous as she approached Harvey, Kamden, and Pete. Travis was behind her, ready to help her with her explanation. She didn't have a good feeling about this.

"Hey, boss," Harvey said, bobbing his head at Travis. "Missus boss." He winked at Rita. She resisted rolling her eyes. He'd dubbed them that ever since they'd been promoted.

"What's going on?" Kamden asked, noticing Rita's expression. Pete stopped what he was doing to listen. Rita felt nervous suddenly.

"I...I have something to say, and it might sound strange and crazy, but it is the truth," she began.

"Okay..." Harvey trailed off.

"Go on," Pete encouraged. Kamden was quiet as he listened. Rita proceeded with telling her story, and all three men stared at her in silence when she was finished.

"No way," Harvey said finally. "Rita, have you hit your head? This is insane."

"It's not," Travis spoke up now, his voice strong and sure.

"I'm sorry, but I can't go along with it," Harvey went on, shaking his head. "This war has made us go bonkers at times, but this is a whole new level." He started to walk away, and Rita felt aggravated. She looked at Kamden, who was looking after Harvey.

"Well?" she challenged.

"I mean, it is an alien race," Pete said, stroking his chin thoughtfully. "Who's to say they can't do crazy shit like that?"

"I'm with Harv," Kamden said now. "Sorry, Rita. It's just too unbelievable."

She felt a bit of despair, but she knew that Kamden was influenced by Harvey more than Pete. Travis shook his head out of annoyance as Kamden also walked away. They were left with Pete.

"I don't really have proof," Rita advised as he surveyed her. "I just need you to trust me."

"How many times have I died, Rita?" Pete asked, and she felt shivers then. She lowered her eyes, and he stood waiting.

"Too many," she answered.

"Wow," he said. "That's...insane."

"Mate, we need you to get past the insane and into the zone of helping us," Travis interrupted. "We need help, man."

Rita could see Pete was wavering, and in the end, he bailed.

"I'm sorry," he said. "I just can't fully wrap my head around it." He left too, and Rita looked at Travis.

"Wankers," he muttered. "All of them."

"I'll keep trying," she said. "It's all I can do."

"Do I ever not believe you?" he asked, curious.

"A few times you called me mad but then came back around," she answered.

"Well, let's hope we can convince these knuckleheads before too long."

Rita just pressed her lips together, agreeing silently. In her heart of hearts, though, she knew she probably was not going to win over the others. She understood.

She wasn't sure if she'd believe it either if roles were reversed.

Reset 225

Rita had officially given up on her team. Harvey never believed her. Kamden wavered. Pete sometimes did, but they still didn't get very far with reaching the Omega even with his help, and she was tired of dying so much. She was feeling exhausted and drained and ready to give up. It didn't seem to matter that she could predict things. The boys were not buying it. Harvey even dared to call her crazy once, which she'd slapped him for and then reset herself just to scare him with killing herself and start over because she was so damn annoyed.

"You wanna try again with the lads?" Travis asked once he was up to speed on everything.

"No." She shook her head. "I'm not wasting time on that anymore."

"What about searching for Brendan?"

She hesitated. It had been a while since she'd looked. She didn't really know where else to look, though.

"You've searched bases?" Travis inquired, making her look at him.

"Yes."

"Then maybe it's time to search in other places."

She knew what places he meant, and it made her feel nauseous. To look in hospitals and morgues was daunting and terrifying. She didn't want to do it for the sake of not wanting to find out her son was dead. The man from her dream during her stay in the psych ward saying Brendan was dead kept playing in her head sometimes; it had just felt so real.

"He hated hospitals," she said now, remembering. Travis waited, knowing she was going to say more. She liked that about him—that he just seemed to know these things.

"Go on," he encouraged when she stopped.

"When he was eight, he got pneumonia," she explained. "He got really sick, and I took him in just to make sure nothing else was going on." It had terrified her, and pacing those halls waiting had been awful. She hadn't been able to stop thinking about when Luke had the same thing happen to him, and she'd wished things had been different, that he could have been there to support her and their son.

"Oye," Travis said, wrinkling his nose slightly with sympathy. "He came through it obviously."

"Yes, but he hated the hospital so much. I don't blame him. I never liked the smell of them either."

It smells like death, Mummy.

How he'd known what death smelled like was still a mystery to her, but he'd been right. On top of the chemical smell and recycled air, you could smell death in that place.

"I couldn't imagine raising a child alone," Travis said now. Rita didn't admit she hadn't been entirely alone. She'd had acquaintances along the way here and there, but she'd never really fully trusted anyone or let them in too far.

"It sucked," she replied, nodding. She hugged herself and tried to breathe. It was time to search for her son in those scary places.

"My gut says he's alive," Travis said now, making her look at him. "You'll find him, Rita."

"I really hope so."

He smiled and patted her shoulder before leaving. Rita really hoped his gut was right.

...

Rita walked into the hospital of Verdun with as much confidence as she could muster, but she wanted to curl up in a ball and hide somewhere. Travis was next to her, and he kept giving her reassuring looks. They approached someone who looked like a doctor and was scribbling madly on a form, clipboard in hand.

"What?" he asked without looking up. "I'm very busy here. Unless you're spurting blood everywhere, move along."

Rita recognized the voice, and she stared at the man before it clicked.

"Sam," she said. He snapped his head up and blinked as he stared at her. Then she saw it hit him.

"Rita!" he exclaimed, dropping his clipboard and rushing to hug her. Rita hugged him back tightly and started to laugh a little. It was so nice to see a familiar, friendly face over here.

"How are you?" she asked as they kept hugging a moment longer. Sam stopped to hold her arms and examine her in front of him.

"Exhausted. How the hell are you?" he asked.

"Same."

"Wow. I never thought I'd see you over here," he went on.

"Me either. Are you a doctor now?"

"Yea. They were calling for all hands on deck, so I left California and headed here to do what I could. Bloody mess I tell you."

"I can imagine," she agreed. There was a door behind Sam that she could see through the crack, and there were a lot of moaning people on the other side.

"What brings you here?" Sam asked, noticing Travis, suddenly, who gave a grim smile and nodded in a greeting.

"I...I'm looking for someone," Rita answered. "I fear they might be dead." Sam winced before bending to pick up his clipboard and stuffing it under his arm.

"What's the name?" he asked, starting to walk down the hall. Rita and Travis followed.

"Brendan Woods."

Sam's brow furrowed, and Rita felt fear that maybe he'd heard the name and was recognizing it. She held her breath as they walked into a room with bodies lined up on the floor and covered with sheets. She couldn't help it—she let out a gasp and pressed her hand to her mouth. Even Travis was clearing his throat a few times next to her to try and rid his sudden emotion at the scene before them.

"Like I said," Sam commented, moving to the desk in the corner, "a bloody mess. There's so many that we're storing the bodies here for now until they can be moved. If we get too many, I fear we may have to just dig a hole and bury them, which will be very devastating."

Rita's heart was pounding. All these bodies. All these lives lost. And this was just one hospital. She wrapped an arm around her stomach and tried not to throw up. She'd known the casualties of this war were significant, but seeing it like this made it all too real. It made her determination to win even stronger.

Travis swore softly, shaking his head. Rita could see a tear in his eye about to fall, and she wanted to cry too.

"I'm not seeing a Brendan Woods here," Sam said after a moment, "but he could be a John Doe, too." He gave her a sympathetic look. "I've got a lot of those here."

"I...I need to know," Rita said, "so I'll have to look."

"I will warn you, then, that you're gonna see some gruesome things," Sam advised. He went to stand next to her now. "Who is this person to you? I'm curious."

"He's my son," Rita answered, and Sam's face went white.

"Your son? Shit..."

"He's just a boy," she whispered next. "Not quite 17." She recalled his birth vividly. He'd been early, which had scared her a lot, but he'd done well and thrived, and he was her entire world.

"How long has he been over here?"

"About a year and a half."

Sam pursed his lips, and Rita knew that it was a long shot to find him alive, but she couldn't give up.

"What does he look like?" he asked next. Rita dug out Brendan's photo, and both Travis and Sam leaned in to examine it.

"Alright," Travis said, getting a good visual. "Let's get started."

Rita watched him move to where Sam showed him all the John Does were, and she dragged her feet as she went to join them. She stood in front of a body, her hand hovering over the sheet by their head and unable to do the simple movement of pulling it back. She could hear Travis making sounds in his throat as he checked body after body. Sam had a few checked by now too, but she just couldn't seem to make herself lift the sheet.

Someone's child, parent, sibling, cousin, aunt/uncle, friend, partner, soul mate, or spouse was under there. A life just gone, snuffed out...taken too soon. She couldn't bear to see it. She closed her eyes, taking in some breaths, and then she lowered her shaking hand and wrapped her fingers around the sheet. She lifted and swallowed hard at the sight of the body. It was hardly recognizable, and she knew that was the case with Mimics. They didn't leave behind perfect corpses.

"Oh God," she gasped, dropping the sheet. It wasn't Brendan, but the image was going to stay with her a long time. She took some more breaths and then steeled herself to this task. It had to be done; she had to toughen up. She moved to the next body and the next and the next. She went until they were all searched, and she rejoined Travis and Sam off to the side, trying not to think about what she'd just done and witnessed, trying not to throw up.

"He's not here," Travis confirmed, and Rita felt great relief.

"I can put the word out," Sam offered. "See if he comes up anywhere."

"Thank you," Rita said, knowing it was pointless right now to do so since she reset everything. "I'll be in touch to let you know when to do that."

"Okay. I'm really sorry, Rita," Sam said as they walked out of that room. "I hope you find him alive."

"Me too."

"Is he...is he Luke's?" Sam asked hesitantly. Rita could see Travis listening intently. He didn't know the story in this reset, and she wasn't planning on getting into it, but since Sam would never remember, she decided to be honest.

"Yes, he is," she replied.

"I could tell," Sam said with a small smile. "He's got Luke's smile."

That he did. Rita would sometimes see it and forget it wasn't Luke sitting across from her and flashing his usual cheeky grin at her.

"He does," she agreed out loud. "I'm sorry, but we have to go, Sam."

"I get it. Please be careful out there, Rita," he said, putting a hand on her shoulder. She patted it fondly and then left with Travis. Once outside, she headed for some bushes and vomited everywhere. She felt herself start to cry once she was done, and she pressed the back of her wrist against her forehead while still leaning over a bit. She appreciated that Travis gave her space in this moment. She didn't want to be vulnerable in front of him. When she'd calmed herself down and went back to him, she found him with some tear stains on his cheeks. In a way, it made her feel less alone and validated for being human, which she appreciated. He cleared his throat to speak.

"One down, a shit ton more to go."

Reset 240

Rita was feeling a bit numb to the concept of death now. She and Travis had checked a bunch more hospitals and morgues, and she had seen so much of death that it felt like a natural sighting to her. She didn't want to lose her feelings altogether, but with how things were going right now, it was hard not to.

They walked out of another hospital in Germany, and Rita started having a thought by the time they got back to the aircraft. Once Travis was settled in and turning everything on, she turned her head to face him.

"What's wrong?" he asked, noticing.

"I want to stop," she answered.

"Stop?"

"Yes."

"Okay..."

"I cannot escape this feeling that my son is dead," she said, "and I just can't stumble across his body in some foreign, strange place because if I do, I will lose the ability to keep my shit together, and I really need to in order to finish this."

"I understand," Travis said softly. "You really think he's dead?"

"How could he survive this?" Rita countered. It was an awful thing to think, but after seeing so many dead bodies of older, experienced men and women, she knew her young son wouldn't have a chance in hell to survive this. Also, she couldn't look at more dead bodies. She couldn't get anymore horrific images stuck in her mind and making her want to vomit every time. She envied that Travis didn't remember. She envied that he wouldn't have nightmares about this for the rest of life like she would.

"Isn't thinking that going to make you hard inside?" Travis asked now.

"Hardness is what will win this in the end," she answered. She was beginning to believe this more and more. Being close with her team was making her vulnerable, and vulnerability was bad in a time like this. She had to close off again. She had to.

"So what's the plan?" Travis inquired as they began to fly, thankfully changing the subject.

"It's time to go back to war."

Reset 245

Rita smiled as his arm pulled her in close against him. His lips were on her neck softly next, moving up to the spot just under her ear. Her feet were intertwined with his; her fingers interlocked with his on her stomach.

"You're so beautiful," he said into her ear. His lips brushing it made her shiver and smile more. She turned in his arms, needing to see him. His easy smile was the same, and his hazel eyes were looking at her with so much love that it hurt.

"Luke," she whispered. "I love you." Before he could respond, she moved in to kiss him softly, slowly, deeply, sensually...

Rita jerked awake to her alarm, her heart slightly pounding. It took her a moment to recognize that Luke was not in bed with her. She sat up slowly, pressing a hand against her face. She blinked and saw Travis was already gone. That was unusual, but it sometimes happened. She got up and dressed and went to find him.

She sat quietly and listened to her team try to banter and keep themselves less anxious than they felt. It slightly irritated her that they were too stupid to believe her and help, although she wasn't sure how much good their help would actually do right now. She didn't engage in their conversation, looking around instead and trying to stay in the moment. Her heart was heavy and broken. She figured she was going to die here; how could this possibly end any other way?

She suddenly lurched to her feet, making her team look at her.

"You alright?" Travis asked.

She didn't answer. She knew she was supposed to be going to get ready to fight, but she suddenly just wanted be anywhere but there. She found a vehicle and borrowed it, driving to the hospital again.

When Sam saw her, he was surprised to see her just like last time. Rita suddenly felt at home, like she was back in high school watching Luke, Jordan, and Sam having a good laugh about something really stupid.

"What brings you here?" Sam asked after hugging her tightly. She instantly broke down, unable to keep it in anymore. He tugged on her arm to lead her somewhere private, and she shared her story, all of it (minus the resetting piece...she didn't feel like being shipped to the psych ward again). It felt so good to tell someone who knew both her and Luke about this whole thing.

"He wouldn't," Sam said when she was done. "Luke wouldn't say those things about you, Rita. It was clear to us that he cared a lot about you and was trying to hide it. It was clear to me when I saw him a year ago that he still loves you. You were everything to him...still are."

"Y-You saw him?" Rita asked, shocked.

"Yea. I was shipping out on the base he was working on."

"Working?"

"He was training soldiers. I'm surprised he's not over here fighting, but something must be holding him there. Or maybe they think his skillset is better utilized there."

Rita's head was spinning. Sam had seen Luke recently.

"How...how is he?" she dared to ask.

"Tired. Sad. Angry. I think this whole invasion has pissed off everyone on this planet, though," Sam said with a dry laugh. Rita nodded slowly, letting the information sink in. She hadn't seen him in a long time; her time in New Jersey being very quick all those years ago.

"Did he say anything about me?" Rita asked, unable to help herself. Sam shifted a bit, and she kept looking at him. "Sam?"

"He said he'd lost you," Sam finally answered. "He said it was the worst thing that ever happened to him and had no idea why it happened."

Rita felt anger inside at this. How could he not know?! He'd said those horrible things! Had he really thought she'd never find out?

"Well, clearly he's an arsehole," Rita said a bit snippily. "He can't just say those things and expect me not to know."

"Then you're an arsehole too," Sam pointed out. "Because you left without telling him about Simon. We both know Luke would have handled that no problem at all."

As much as Rita disliked hearing it, she knew it was true. It's what plagued her all this time and made her feel so conflicted.

"I really just wanted to keep everyone safe," she said quietly. "In the end, that was all that mattered."

"I get it," Sam said gently. "And I'm sorry it happened."

"I miss him every day," she confessed. Sam patted her arm fondly, and she held back her tears. She cleared her throat and gave a weak smile. "Did you ever get to work things out with Melissa?"

"No," Sam answered, shaking his head. "That was never meant to be."

"I think it should have been meant to be," Rita argued. "She just let her past stop her from letting people in."

"She was more fond of Luke than anyone," Sam said, and Rita felt that familiar bristling inside. It caught her off guard.

"She was?"

"Yea. I figured it out after a while that she was crazy about him, but he wasn't interested back. I always wondered if he would have gone for it if he hadn't known I loved her. Or if you weren't in the picture."

Rita did not know what to do with this information. Her suspicions were finally confirmed.

"I wouldn't worry about it," Sam advised, making her look at him again. "He's pretty torn up about you still. And besides, that was a long time ago. I heard she got married and was living in Montana again."

Rita digested this information. She didn't know what else to say, and it appeared Sam didn't either. Then he got paged.

"I have to go," he said. "I'll keep an eye out for Brendan and let you know."

"Thank you," she murmured, knowing he would not remember any of this. It kind of disappointed her, really.

"Take care of yourself, eh?" Sam said, giving her a final hug. When they parted ways, Rita stuffed her hands into her coat pockets and walked out with her head low. She was supposed to be on her way to the battle by now, but she wasn't.

Without a reason to keep living the rest of the day, she decided to end it.

Reset 248

"Rita," Travis said loudly, trying to catch her arm. She was swinging her melee into a dead Mimic repeatedly, having killed it after it killed Harvey. "Rita!"

The image was stuck in her mind—Harvey's face when he got killed. It was one of shock and horror and angst, and all Rita could see now was little Eliza getting the news her daddy was never coming home, and it enraged her. She let out an anguished shriek.

"RITA!" Travis bellowed now, finally getting her to stop. Rita dropped the melee and sank to her knees, starting to sob. It was too much. It was all too much. She couldn't keep doing this. She couldn't handle it anymore.

"It's alright," Travis said now, down to her level and pulling her into a hug from behind. "It's alright, Rita. You'll bring him back."

She gripped his arm with her hand tightly, trying to get a hold of herself. Kamden and Pete were too far away to witness this, thankfully.

"I can't do this," she said through her tears. "I can't."

"I know it feels like you can't, but just take it one day at a time," Travis encouraged.

"I have been; it's too hard...I can't keep going."

"But you have to," he insisted. "We are all counting on you, and I don't say that to put pressure on you—I say it to encourage you. We need you, Rita, to do this until it ends."

"What if it never ends?" Rita asked. "What if I'm trapped doing this forever?"

"If you don't reset, the power leaves, right?"

"I...I guess so..."

"Then just let it go," he said. "If you really can't do it anymore, let it go. We'll find another way to win this war."

Rita knew in her heart that was a ridiculous notion. The chance to come back to life was not something to just throw away. She had to get a grip and get it right now.

"I'm okay," she said after a moment.

"You sure?"

"Yes."

She had to stop caring so much. She had to not be so invested in people—her team. She had to numb herself from the pain in order to keep going.

Hadn't she done that often enough in the last 17 years?

"Contact left," Travis said now, moving quickly. Rita lurched to her feet, weapons aimed at the incoming Mimic. It was the one behind her that ended up killing her.

Reset 250

Don't care, don't care, don't care...

Rita hadn't had this mantra in her head for a while, but it was definitely familiar. She got ready for battle alongside her team, and she avoided looking at and talking to them. She couldn't care about them. She had to shut that side of her down; it was only dragging her into an emotional pit she couldn't escape from, and she could not afford that at all.

Not if she was going to win this war.

"You're a bit closed off," Travis noted as they walked towards their transport.

"I have to be," she replied, climbing aboard. Travis didn't respond and simply hooked up next to her. Rita looked at Harvey, Kamden, and Pete across from her. Kamden and Harvey were still managing to rib each other. She didn't know how they could.

She braced herself for the impact. She'd learned many times that dropping beforehand did not end well. As everyone hollered and shouted while the transport went down, she released herself at the right time and fell to the ground. The cable stopped her fall until she was close enough to the ground; then she freed herself and landed on her feet. She headed for the battleground as her team landed behind her with Travis catching up to her easily. She managed to exit and find a vehicle with Travis, and they were halfway to the cathedral when they were attacked.

Reset 258

"Rita," Travis said as she geared up. "You shouldn't close yourself off like this..."

"I'm fine," she said curtly. She was starting to not care, and despite being so numb, it slightly scared her because she wasn't the type to not care. Sure, she'd gotten depressed in the past where she felt nothing, but she still cared about others. This time, she didn't.

"This isn't you," he insisted. "I mean, I know you didn't really share much with me, but you weren't like this. You weren't shut down like this..."

"I can't care anymore, Travis," she said, her voice tight. "I need to focus, and if I keep caring the way I was, I will fail. I can't fail. I have to do this."

"You're gonna lose who you are," he said gently.

"I don't think it matters anyway," she replied, swallowing her emotion. "There won't be anything left when this is over, and without my son, there's no point in carrying on anyway."

Travis only knew the bare minimum in this reset, but he'd known about Brendan beforehand anyway, so he knew her fears.

"I don't like to hear that," he said, giving her a concerned look.

"Come on, Travis," she retorted, waving her hand. "You can't seriously think we can win this war?"

"Why can't we?" he challenged. "All we have to do is outsmart them, and with this power, we can do that."

"I guess I've just seen too much to believe anything different," Rita said back, finishing up and heading to the waiting transport. She didn't want him to convince her to feel any different right now. She just couldn't. She just had to keep going.

But it was just so exhausting to keep dying for nothing.