The sound of comm static filled Novas mind, jumping her awake and making her groan "Seriously..what the fuck.." she rubbed the side of her head when the sound of Ratchets voice filled her head "Nova? Finally you answer, where the hell are you? No one can find you!" She sat up with a sigh "just out and about..needed to clear my head" the medic angrily scowled "You arent even supposed to leave your bed, much less the base! Unblock your location so Optimus can find you." Huffing, she opened her sparks location, looking over at the sun.
It was just before noon, the sun had risen higher in the sky and shone down on the Earth. What snow there was had melted, leaving the Nevada desert to be a shallow mud pit. Her vents opened and a happy hum emitted from her as the sun continued to warm her plates, reflecting off her paint and making the femme glow a brilliant blue. A small desert mouse scurried its way up to her, its tiny eyes looking up at the large robot only to run off behind a rock as she shifted her weight. The echoed sound of engine rumbling let her know Optimus was close.
She closed her eyes, leaning back against the rock behind her, and took a deep breath. She needed to take her mind off her past...she had let it control her for too long...but she wanted nothing more than to rip the Decepticon leader apart. He was the one who allowed the Decepticon medics do whatever they want to their Autobot prisoners, and let them take her sparkling from her. They would never experience the feeling of having life growing inside them for so long, only to be ripped out and stripped of the little life it had. Even though she wasn't far along, she was enough to feel and know their sparkling. Her mind shifted over to Ratchet. He showed signs he still had feelings for her but was she too hurt to return back to love? She knew the Decepticons were here, and if she was taken away again she didnt want either of them to feel that pain again. Heck, even if they did repair their relationship, would they attempt for another sparkling? Of course the first was an accident, but they both were happy and excited to become parents.
The loud rumbling of a familiar red and blue semi broke her thoughts as Optimus drove up, transforming in front of her "Nova are you ok? Youve been missing for some time now" she rolled her eyes "I'm fine...I just needed some alone time...some time to reflect.." he frowned and hummed "I understand...however Ratchet is most unhappy with you. I suggest we get back to base before he drags you back there himself" she gave a small laugh at the thought "Id like to see him try..." she gave her leg a rub then shifted, looking up as Optimus offered her his servo, pulling her to her feet "thanks.." she mumbled. After a moment of silence she looked down, rubbing the back of her head "Optimus...can I ask you something?" He gave a small nod and rested his hand on her shoulder, sensing her uneasiness "of course...what seems to be bothering you?" she shut her comm off quickly then sighed "do you know if Ratchet still has any feelings towards me...I mean its been years and years since Ive seen him...seen any of you...and I just dont know what to do. I would love to try to fix our relationship, but at this point would we be better off staying friends? We arent spark bonded and we no longer have a main reason to become mated so...I just...I dont know.." The older Prime gazed down at her, hearing the pain in her voice "Nova...as both your friend...and a fellow Prime..I want to give you my honest opinion. I believe he still does. When you were captured he spent endless days looking for you...trying to track you down.. I know Ratchet is tough and the only time I've seen him cry was a few weeks after your capture, when the war worsened, more Autobot bodies were found, and we feared you were killed. I never felt your matrix extinguish but I was still young and didnt know what that meant. I had never seen him so upset, and to this day that was the worst I have ever seen him" His optics met hers and he lightly raised her chin, keeping eye contact "Nova, I believe he still loves you, hes just asking himself the same questions you are. He thinks you dont love him." Her eyes darkened at the final words. Does he really think that? Oh how her spark ached at the thought of hurting him any more. She nodded and stepped away, transforming and driving back towards the base. Optimus watched her drive off them he himself transformed, following her back.
Once back, she transformed and looked around, her optics falling on Ratchet who angrily made his way over "There you are! What in Primus's name got into you? Just because you can walk around doesnt mean you can leave the base, especially alone and knowing the Decepticons are probably looking for you!" his voiced edged with pain and fear, afraid she would be taken away again. His eyes narrowed at her as he stopped in front of her, glaring her down then quickly softening as he saw her tear up "Nova I..I'm sorry..I shouldnt have yelled..come sit down" she bowed her head, walking over to the MedBay and sitting down on the bed, avoiding eye contact "I'm sorry Ratchet...I just needed some time alone...especially after the other night.." he shook his head, rubbing his temples. "I know...I..I know it hurts.." he looked at her, sighing. How he just wanted to wrap her in a hug and hold her.. he hated seeing her upset and could only imagine the horrors she went through. He sighed loudly then turned "follow me"
He walked off down the hallway, her following behind until they came to a hangar door. Ratchet opened it and stepped inside "This is your room now. It used to be storage but we got it all cleaned up for you. There's really just the basics here. A bed, work table, and a shower if you ever felt you needed to wash yourself off. I always do after we have a beach mission. That sand gets stuck in your gears and you're itching the next few weeks " she took a look around and nodded "This is nice. Thank you" She sat on the bed, rubbing the soft sheets. Unlike humans, the Autobots didn't really have a need to keep themselves warm. However with the freezing winter approaching, each Autobot got a thick blanket to help in case the nights got cold.
"Ratchet... can I ask you something..." she shifted a bit, a little nervous to even ask. He walked over, standing in front of her "Of course" she paused then sighed "do you still have feelings for me... all these years later?" He gave a small smile, kneeling down in front of her "of course, I've been waiting for you every day. Either for your return... our for me to join you" She blinked, looking up at him "but.. what if I hurt you again...I don't want you to relive that same pain" her optics teared up "I mean... I lost our sparkling...I don't want to risk that again" his eyes narrowed and he cupped her cheek "look at me. That wasn't your fault. I may not be spark bound to you but having that sparkling gave me a closer connection to you. I could feel the pain you were going through. Definitely not as intense as you but I could feel it. I could also feel our little baby pass too" his optics darkened in sadness and tears formed in the brim of them. Nova took notice and frowned, reaching around his neck and hugging him "I'm sorry...I would love for us to pickup where we left off... go back to our happy days... but I don't want to hurt you again.." He pulled back, wrapping his arms around her and placing his hands on her hips "You won't... you can't leave me here...Nova I love you. I have for a long time... I've never given up on you. Somehow.. some part of me knew you'd be back " He pulled her closer against him, resting his head in the corner of her neck and shoulder, taking a deep breath. He missed her scent, her touch, the sheer beat of her spark against him. They both gave a happy hum as their sparks beat in unison, growing happily. "I would love to continue where we were" He whispered into her "I know..I would too. I just need to take it slow... let myself mentally heal.." She held the back of his head, the two intertwined "yes, of course. I know you've been through a lot" he pulled his head back, held her cheek and leaned forward, pressing his lips to hers softly. She gave a soft groan, kissing back. Damn. She had forgotten how good he kissed. She let the kiss sit for a minute then pulled away, giving him a small smile "thank you..."
He shifted his weight, picking her up and laying her on the bed "You can rest if you need. The others plan on going out tonight for some fun. I might let you join if you behave" He gave her a wink then turned, walking out and closing the door behind him.