Loyalties:
Mass Effect Trilogy is a Bioware game. For any reference to the Official Game All rights are owned by Bioware. The Fan Fiction "Mass Effect At Dawn Again" is fruit of my imagination and my work, it is a free tribute, passionate and personal to a great video game. It is not allowed any use partial or total for profit and not.
Chapter 7
Fumbling in the dark
… I didn't speak to you anymore, until we were getting shuttle, and reaching enormous Broker's ship, hiding inside a massive and incessant electrical storm ... You were angry! I still wonder, if it made me more harm your anger, or your disappointment. I could feel all your disillusion, hitting my face, at every glance, like a slap. I realized I was hurting you, and this did nothing but increase my guilt towards you, but I couldn't help it! I panicked! It was suffocating me, like a grip around my neck. I was constantly paralyzed, and I couldn't react. I was left nothing else to do, concentrating about saving Feron, hoping to get it, also my mood could get better ... I tried to start a conversation with you, never to be forced to face a long embarrassing silence.
L: Hagalaz, the oceans boil during the day, then snap-freeze ten minutes after sundown ...
S: The Shadow Broker lives in this?
L: His ship follows the sunset. Completely undetectable in the storm, unless you know where to look ...
… The shuttle bay was locked down, so we had landed outside on the ship, looking for a hatch, but quickly because exterior was constantly hit by dangerous electrical storms able to harm our systems, up to threaten our very survival. The ship surface was shielded by a sophisticated system of masses and energy heat sinks. Everything suggesting, the Broker had noticed us because, he threw get us a damned Army assembled with Mechs, Drones, Engineers and no matter kind of Agents, armed to the teeth, who did every intention to send, us in hell. We had forced fighting with all our strength to resist. To advance much time had required because the ship was huge. We gap opened up, through hordes of enemies, making many of them flying into the space, thanks to the massive use of our Biotic powers. We were trying to move quickly, but it took a few hours, then finally, we reached the last security door, and managed to bypass ... Even inside, troubles never end! The Shadow Broker had a goddamn army at his command! We had to fight hard again, but thanks to the Goddess, we found Feron … He was alive! I was so happy to see him, but unfortunately, he was in a bad state! The Broker, kept him tied to a constraint chair, connecting to a neural torture device, which caused him an incredible suffering. He was kept alive by a medical device, which prevented him to die during the torture ... Oh, poor Feron! As I realized he spent the last two years in that terrible state, it was breaking my heart! We couldn't release it, without risking to kill him. First, we had to reach the Broker's Control Room, turning off the device ... Probably that day, I was the last person in the whole Galaxy that Feron expected to see!
F: Liara?!
L: Feron! Hold on, we're getting you out of here!
F: you have to shut off the power ... pull me out now, and ... Aaargh ... my brain cooks!
S: What's a point of this cage?!
The situation looked very complicated, but you couldn't lose heart. You were infusing me your usual ... Faith!
S: Easy or not, we're all getting out of here!
F: you know the Shadow Broker's waiting for you, right?
S: I'm counting on it!
L: we'll be back for you, Feron!
The Broker's control room was nearby, we had just getting rid of his last henchmen, and we would be face-to-face with one of the most feared and dangerous entity of the galaxy entire. In all this time, I had always wondered who Broker really was, what about her appearance, what about his reaction when he faces to us ... I was looking forward to seeing straight into his eyes, before flying him through the air smothered in a singularity, then shoot him, relentlessly, until my gun get catching fire in my hand! We entered the room. A deep, menacing voice welcomed us, making me run a chill down my spine! I could expect to see everything ... But I never imagined to see, what appeared that day, through the door ...
SB: Here for the Drell? Reckless, even for you, Commander ...
S: Not even that bomb back on Illium ...
SB: Civilians were expendables ...
Very soon my anger got the upper hand, on my fear ...
L: expendables like Feron?!
The Broker perfectly knew how getting enemy's security more weak, leveraging on guilt. How letting down my guard, but ... I had no intention to let myself knock down by him! I was too furious as crashing into his stupid tricks ...
SB: Dr. T'Soni. Your interference caused all this. Feron betrayed me when he handed you Shepard's body. The Drell is simply paying the price.
L: You're quite confident for someone with nowhere left to hide ...
SB: You travel with fascinating companions, doctor ...
L: You're no putting a hand on anyone!
SB: It's pointless to challenge me, Asari! I know your every secrets, while you fumble in the dark ...
The Shadow Broker, showed off an enviable calm, although we had struck down all his army, he didn't seem to worry at all about us. His self-confidence was starting to really get on my nerves. Especially since I began to understand who we were dealing. At that moment I thought that for me too, it was better to flaunt into believing that I was fully aware of who I was facing on ... Of course, I was only bluffing, but it worked!
L: Is that right? You're a Yahg, a pre-spaceflight species quarantined to their home-world for massacring the Council's first contact team ... This Base is older than your planet's discovery, which probably means you killed the original Shadow Broker sixty years ago, then took over. I'm guessing you were taking from your world by a trophy hunter who wanted a slave … or a pet. How am I doing?
Broker knew he had no other choice but square off with us. When he got up, dominated us with all his fearsome aspect. He was really huge! His wild appearance, with those large curved horns, all those eyes and the endless rows of teeth, revealed his nature as ruthless hunter. He broke the heavy granite desk, as if it were a piece of cardboard, hurling it on us, blow over Miranda who, was lying on the floor unconscious. Suddenly, you were jumping on me, just in time to drag me safe ... We were just me and you! I soon realized that I could never confront with him by myself! If you had not been at my side ... if you had not offered me your help ... The Broker would surely kill me! Luckily we were together, and in the usual way! However, it was absolutely not easy because the Broker had an impenetrable Omni-shield that he could continuously restoring, by means of a ceiling device. The only way to stop him it was during recharge process, hitting him in an unlikely melee attack. It seemed to challenge a mountain, and in spite of our efforts, we were continually frustrated by that damn generator of shields. Until, I had the idea how to destroy the device, hurling the entire Biotic strength I could muster on it, when the Broker was reloaded, hoping that overwhelming energy produced will come back to haunt him. Finally, it came time ... All my hatred, my fury, my torment, turned into blue! For some dramatic moments they danced angrily suspended, by iridescent cloak wrapped around my body. Brightening, made me electrify, intensifying it vehemently, turning it into pure energy, to chase a more and more high point, to reach a peak ... hurling on. Splashing away in a flash, freeing forever my soul with a burst of light that, it disastrously exploded, reaching the ceiling. Then, the overhead, other flashes of light ... then silence! No more hatred, no torment, no fury … Only silence, inside my soul! Relief finally, just ... my redemption! The trick worked, and the Shadow Broker was disintegrated by energy overload. I couldn't believe it! The two of us, together, we were able to defeat him. Finally, it was over! War was won, Feron was safe! Suddenly, communication terminals in the room, started transmitting incessantly. Broker's Operatives in mission, asking details about connection failure occurred. Everyone wants to talk with the Broker, receiving confirmations, instructions ... A crazy idea, quickly found its way into my mind ... No one who had seen us enter had survived. No one knew that we were there. No one knew the true identity of the Shadow Broker ...
... So, I opened communications, saying to all Agents, that it had been a power fluctuation while upgrading, but we were back online again, and I expected a status report on all operations within the next solar day ... At that moment Feron entered the room, he didn't believe one's own eyes ...
F: Goddess of oceans ... it's you ... You ... how!?
L: Well, everyone who's ever seen him in person is dead, so ...
F: You're the new Shadow Broker?!
At the beginning, even you were not at all convinced it was a good idea. In my opinion, instead, to take on the Shadow Broker identity, representing objectively one unmissable opportunity ...
L: It was either that or lose everything: his contacts, his trading sources. Those will really help us! With the Shadow Broker information network, I can give you … I can …
… Finally it was over, Feron was safe! I could follow you onboard the Normandy, being side by side in fight against the Collectors. I just wanted to be close you, give you my support, my help when you did need me more ... Trying to let myself go! If I took Broker's identity, on the other hand ... It meant, turning down the thing I wanted most in my life! All that I wished at that moment, it was just to come with you, but the more rational part of me, couldn't overlook the Broker's precious resources because they could prove essential, helping you against the Reapers. The mission was so important! It dragged into everything, and into everyone: our worlds, our civilizations, our future ... So, I had to be able, putting aside my personal feelings, Ours! What if those data could provide any answers? What if there was the solution to stop the Reapers? What if the total galactic annihilation had been caused up by my selfishness? I couldn't pull me back, even if I had a great fear not making it! I felt completely worn-out! The great deal of despair I suffered through two long years, all the anger for the Shadow Broker, the boundless guilt for you ... for Feron ... My heart torn in pieces, in one endless hell, and ... now again, the unbearable fear, losing you again and again! All these emotions and feelings, flooded me in forces, and before I realized, they were already turning into tears. A sudden pounding liberating rain, which did not any intention to stop it! Feron and Miranda left us alone ...
L: It's over ... It's finally ... for two years!
For you, it was instinctive draw me lovingly in your arms, hold me tenderly to you, your mouth on my lips. I wished the time would stop, to feel your warmth envelop me in that tender consolation forever. However, I was so bad! I couldn't brush off my mind from my obsession that it all had end again! I couldn't let myself go, coming back to you, even if more intensely than ever, I ... I felt I belong to you, and for sure ... I couldn't let you go!
S: It's all right?
Your lips had consumed all my oxygen, and I still couldn't breathe, as my mind desperately attempted to rationalize, pulling itself back! At the same time, in another side of me, my heart prayed with all its strength that you prevented me to do it! I was completely confused, scared and seized by a desperate need of you!
L: It's been two years. I don't … We're different people ... You have your mission, and …
Oh, Emy! I felt you so close, it seems that you exactly knew what I was going through. You perfectly could perceive every torment I didn't confess you ... I tried getting away, to regain the control of my emotions, but you held me because, you too couldn't let me go. While, you gather me back inside your embrace ... into your eyes, through the mad beating of your heart. While you drawn me hovering on your lips, so thirsty, I was losing my balance all around the intense seduction of your perfume, and ... I felt only your Love, flaring up like wildfire, burning limitless, while none of us was able to tame it, nevermore! I found myself suspended inside irresistible attraction of your breath. In that wonderful sensuality moment of, preceding contact, while your heart was plunged headlong inside mine. I could feel the warmth of your embrace, wrap me in a reassuring caress. I didn't resist the urge of fusing me onto your mouth. I felt it grows, like a wave, and take my soul like a hurricane. I just wanted to slide slowly, meeting your lips, desperately yearned my own. Belong entirely to them, canceling forever my reason, deceiving my will, writing again my fate inside yours! Finally, that kiss! It was so involving and emotional, deep and passionate, which for a moment it seemed to me, passing out on your lips. Losing me in your heart, by to fuse me inextricably to your soul, and ... finally, to find my own soul again! Oh Emy! I craved you for so long time, and suddenly ... overlook what I felt for you, didn't make any sense! I fought with myself hard to regain self-control, not surrender me, not drag you in the passion, resisting that overwhelming need of you!
L: Okay ... Okay!
S: Okay!
L: But we should focus. Let's see what our options are ... No safeguard, or user restrictions. It's like he never anticipated anyone but himself being here ... And it's all ours!
Broker's all data they were accessible and available. If I wanted to help you, I had a lot of work to do, and you had stolen too much time on your mission helping me, so you had to go!
S: Don't be a stranger this time!
L: Small chance of that. Come back soon!
Following days were very intense for both of us. You were looking for a safe way to cross Omega4 Relay, and coming out alive. Meanwhile, you needed enhancing your team, to study a never-failing plan, potentiate the Normandy in such a way that it could hold up the fight, and to make matters worse, take care of the Collectors who, they were becoming more and more threatening for human Colonies. Fortunately, you were not alone! Even if I couldn't go with you, I was comforted because, you could count on two of ours dear friends like Garrus and Tali, not to mention that Grunt, which seemed even bigger and dangerous than Wrex. I was happy there was also Miranda onboard. When we had encountered on Omega I didn't like her at all. She was racist and ruthless. However, she seemed changed, I had immediately the distinct feeling that you had found a way to break through the ice in her heart. Her loyalty toward you it struck me. Miranda was really skilled, but I didn't think she was so deadly in battle, and it made me feel a bit less terrified. As for me, since we had left, I never had a moment's rest. I spent my days of 24 hours, studying and catalog the Broker's data, trying to exploit its knowledge, and any useful clue to defeat the Reapers. For days I didn't see a bed, and in the morning, Feron found me often asleep in front of the terminal. I had no time to rest, there was always something more important to do! Finally, one evening I heard the Normandy, hooking on the dock bay, it was you! I missed you so much! I couldn't believe, you were able to reach me! Oh my Star, I was so happy to see you! Do you remember what happened that night? Oh, well me too, but ... We'll have to wait until tomorrow to know it because, as usual, I didn't realize how late it is ... I have to get some rest, otherwise, I cannot support a mental merger, but don't worry, my Star, tomorrow morning we will continue to remember ... You know, I miss you Shepard, isn't it? Goodnight!
… Aethyta is sitting next to Karin for many hours, and tenderly holding her hand. She needs this contact, much more than Karin can suppose, to maintain her concentration and lucidity necessary to listen Liara's memories, without getting caught up in despair ... Sometimes, the anger runs at full gallop through her, suddenly, leaving no time to think, nor controlling of any reactions ...
A: Oh, what a crap! Whenever Liara re-lives a memory with Shepard, I think it will not happen them something worse! But shit, no! Systematically, each time I find out I was wrong! ... By Athame! How much fuck else of pain have been forced to endure those two poor girls!?
Karin draws the hand of Aethyta to her mouth in silence, slowly caressing it with her lips along the back, until she feels Aethyta's tension slowly dissolving, and vanish. Then, she looks at her with tenderness, and with soothing voice she says ...
K: Hey calm down Sweetie! Remember one of the first flashback to which you have witnessed? ... When Liara remembered the first time she combined her mind with Shepard's one?
A: Of course, she was trying to decipher Shepard's visions about the Prothean beacon ...
K: Yeah! Well, on that occasion she described Shepard perfectly: great mental strength, really unshakable willpower, pure heart, great gentleness of spirit, and a lot, a lot of pain! They knew each other since a very short time, yet the one that she has seen was exactly Commander Shepard! A person truly exceptional, which probably began to suffer on the day she came into the world! You know, Shepard was orphaned at a very tender age. She was dragged from pillar to post, in her early years, then she ended up spending much of her childhood and youth left to herself, on the way. She had pulled ahead as she could, she was just a child, and she had to fend for herself with her own forces. Sometimes it is not easy, scrape out an existence if you have none in the world! So, she joined with a street kids gang's, sharing with them the same solitude, making the fear not so overwhelming, learning how to hide the pain, how to survive, getting some more opportunity to have something putting under her teeth, get by! Those terrible experiences taught her to never give up! Growing up, she had a criminal career already esplanade in front of her. Smart as she is, and damn skilled, and crackerjack, if she wanted to, she could become someone even in crime industry. If she picked out this way, it's highly likely that Omega today could have another Queen! Shepard could do anything she wanted, taking all she wanted to take, by forcing and brutally, becoming a ruthless criminal, but ... She never approved that style of life, so when she was in age, she enlisted in Alliance Army, where she always stood out for her human qualities, and her great sense of justice. Oh, she never missed her spirit of sacrifice, that's sure, and she began to show her heroism very soon, bringing off a multitude of missions impossible. Much of her command attitude is due to her long and open view, which distinguishes her, and thanks a great desire for peace. Shepard has always been a great leader, who every soldier would follow even in hell. Shepard knows how to look inside people, getting out the best of each one, she instinctively knows how to make herself loved, and her men blindly trust in her. Soldiers constantly see her in the middle of the action, always on the front line, ready to help those in need, sacrificing herself for first. She isn't the type of person who break free from risk, she never flees in face of the enemy, specially when the scare bites the butt. She just cannot stand back, for this reason everybody respect her, and her feats in battle dragged Armies, and frighten enemies. Even death couldn't stop her! Shepard came back stronger, and more lethal than before, and even more ... human! Since Liara has come into her life, much of the pain which Shepard cleverly concealed within herself, has turned into joy! A deep happiness that shines in her eyes, escapes from her beaming smile, bringing her, more enthusiasm, serenity. Despite these dark times as well, a great safety, even more determination and courage... There is no doubt, Liara was essential in treating many of Shepard's wounds ... So it is obvious, as every gesture, every thought everything she makes, it is always dedicated to Liara ... Shepard could never live without your daughter, Aethyta, and ... whatever happens, always Shepard will come back to her! On the other hand, she has so much in common with Liara ... A shared vision of life to begin with: Shepard and Liara are guided by the same deep sense of justice ... Oh, well you know, even Liara is a very crackerjack person. She is brave and resolute and at Shepard side, she also became an excellent soldier. Both of them can be very skilled using their brain. Their open minds are always disposed to inner growth, and for dialogue in exchange of opinions. Everything they do is constantly supported by a deep desire to achieve the Peace. Their sweetness, furthermore, the gentleness of spirit which they share through in relation to other people, the unlimited availability to help. And what about the spirit of sacrifice with which they complete each mission, and the great talent in everything they can do!? These are some of the million things, making them lovebirds! It was virtually inevitable that their lives intertwine so radically, so inextricably! Do you know what I think? They belong together Aethyta, and in front of so incredibly deep feeling, it is highly likely that no pain is able to scratch long enough the joy and serenity they both feel, in every moment when they're together! Even now, despite Shepard is in this state, Liara's discomfort and pain get continuously comfort by the love she feels for Shepard, who gives her the strength not to give up! And she'll never give in!
A: Oh, Karin, thanks Honey! Your words are so comforting, Sugary! To know Shepard through Liara's eyes is one thing ... As she freaked out by her sizzling hot Commander, she cannot be impartial, but you ... Why should you be backslapping with strength of Shepard's feelings with my daughter?! Why, shouldn't be you impartial? It seems you know both of them pretty damn good, so I have a great respect for your judgment, and I am absolutely willing to trust you!
K: Oh well ... thank you Thyta, but to be honest in this moment, I don't know whether to be happy or ... or desperate! Why don't you stay here, this night?!
Aethyta smiles, trying to hide irrepressible emotion causing by intriguing request, which is putting her stomach upside down, making a mockery of her breathing. She draws Karin with strength in her arms, stroking her back intently, while she feels pressing the center of Karin on her chest, and her heartbeats merging, until they go crazy mixed into Karin ones. Her expression is a bit more serious, as she continues to smile, with a breath of uncomfortable mirrored in her dark blue gaze, and very sincerely she tells ...
A: You know, I never thought I could feel me once again in this way! You are a wonderful creature, Karin!
Then, immediately she adds, with a much more amused tone ...
A: Mmh, actually ... you'll probably wind up to get one of the four or three most arousing Doctors ... I've met from centuries!
Karin tightens closer, brightening into a wide grin. Her heart stops then restarts, suddenly. She recognizes the adrenaline surge that flows nicely into her whole body, making her feel thrilled. She cannot help but be pleased for all those compliments, and then, she loves deeply the Aethyta's intriguing way to joke with her. Now she is obligated to admit, in silence, in the dark into herself, at least … maybe she had never felt more involved with someone before. To maintain calm, she forces herself to analyze the matter, getting a scientific and rational explanation theory. She focuses on the electrical impulses transmission system, which activate neural connections. She concludes that the cause probably lies in the mind meld, which Aethyta can keep for untold duration. The interesting event can give rise to a mutual transfer of electrical impulses in their nervous systems, which originates through the skin, producing continuous transmission of neural stimulation from one to another in both forward and reverse directions, and conversely, generating a continuous exchange of deep tactile and physiological responses, able to converge in one unspeakable communion of each of their five senses. This carefully examining the scientific aspect of the matter! In practice, however, this is a greatest of wonders experience, so intense that overwhelms her, and whip her up into a frenzy! It crosses and mingles herself with Aethyta all the time, heavily obscuring her reason, dragging herself deeply into Aethyta's thoughts, linking her own, letting Karin precipitate directly into Aethyta's emotions, tangling up in each of her thrills, disorienting suddenly all Karin's sensations, which get transformed into Aethyta's ones, who all at once become again Karin's. Coming and going together, in totally harmony, involving both of them in euphoric and absolute complicity, up to coming inside that unreadable breath of wind who brings together every thing of us which we cannot see with the eyes, and almost always we cannot explain with the mind. The more mysterious thing, more ethereal can describe ourselves ... The thing which contains all thousands words inside only one: The Soul! Pure emotion inside soul, which produces into Karin, such a type of effect that, rationally and scientifically she will can never explain! All she knows is that it is damn spectacular, very great, and exciting, there is nothing equal in her memories. While she is thinking so intently, her hands move unwitting along Aethyta's back. Aethyta does not stop to smile, playing with her fingers between Karin's hair. Karin is hurrying to try a logical reason about what her hands are doing, as they glide stealthily along the Aethyta's back, lying on her backside. They surround it with more and more evident movements until, Karin can no longer keep of looking deeply for Aethyta's breath, get caught on her own emotion. It is growing, moment by moment, evolving, ripening, turn into something more important, more and more strong, able to frighten her that perhaps, she wouldn't like listen. Karin looks with passion into Aethyta's eyes, reading the same emotion, she feels herself draw and wrap into Aethyta's disarming sweetness. Then, she smiles again, wondering what you should be afraid. She senses a big relief, sharing the playful tone of Aethyta, and with irony she whispers, even into her breath...
K: Oh, Sweetie! Maybe I'm not completely clearheaded, right now, and I would not risk scaring you to death! But in truth ... between my ten million lovers, tonight, I can't imagine anyone more alluring than you!
Aethyta tightens stronger, her smile widening. She runs after her beats, instead she loses her control again, just her fingers moving slow, from hair to cheeks of Karin. The lips are very close to Karin's breath, they draw tenderly on Karin's face and neck, accentuating each word with a light kiss, while Aethyta's voice can no longer hide, in the same ironic tone, a slight tremor whispering again ...
A: Oh Sugary, don't worry ... You know, I recently discovered that I like very much getting some risk with you ... Hmm, actually, I love deeply to do it, more and more every second, and to be ... honest with you, I ... you know, I had never kissed a Doctor in this way before, and ... this night, there is no better place where I would go ...
K: Oh then, please, Sweetie, don't stopping you ...
To be Continue …