Regina opened her eyes as she slowly awakened. Looking to the side, she saw Graham peacefully sleeping beside her, his face blank, as though he had no thoughts, no dreams, as though there was nothing there but an animated husk.
She frowned. She'd long since lost count of the number of days since her curse began, but she knew one thing. This wasn't the happy ending she'd bargained for.
Oh at first she'd believed it was. She thought back to that first morning of the curse, how she'd awoken happy, triumphant. Her curse was cast, her revenge complete, her perfect kingdom, made in her own image, there for the enjoying. Her subjects deferred to her, respected her, jumped at her every command.
And Snow, well that was the most delicious of all. Snow had become a timid, mousy shadow of herself. Regina had taken great delight in leading her nemesis to the hospital to see the man who'd never again wake up. At first Regina had been disappointed that her soldiers had failed to kill Charming. After all, that would have been poetic justice–because of Snow Regina's love had been killed, because of Regina, Snow's had–but the more she thought about it, the more she realized Charming alive, but in a coma–there, but not really there–was even better. It twisted the knife that much deeper.
It was the first time Regina led Snow to Charming's bedside, though, that she began to feel the first kernel of dissatisfaction. What good was it for Mary Margaret to see David suffering if she didn't even know who he was?
As the days passed, that kernel of dissatisfaction had grown. Yes, she ruled the town. Yes, the townsfolk deferred to her. Yes, they even treated her with polite respect, but none of it was real. No one obeyed her because they wanted to. No one treated her kindly because they truly liked her. She'd taken their free will away, and in doing so and made their compliance, their affection meaningless.
For the briefest of moments she thought she had found a solution.
When Kurt and Owen (especially Owen) came to town and seemed to genuinely enjoy her company, she thought she'd finally found something–someone–to plug the hole in her heart.
But that had gone wrong too. Despite her hospitality, they'd chosen to leave her. Oh she'd tried to stop them, but the more she tried to manipulate the situation, the farther she'd driven little Owen away, until finally he ran from her, crossed the town line and sprinted away.
She'd have given him anything, everything, if he'd only stayed and given her the affection she craved. Why couldn't he see that?
And so she'd let him go, unable to give chase, and she'd gone back to her "perfect" life. One day she'd find a way to fill that hole in her heart, but until then, she'd have to settle for the paradise she'd created.
Even if it wasn't real.