A/N: Before you begin reading this chapter, you may want to go to my author's note at the bottom and pull up the two songs mentioned on YouTube so you can listen as you read. I also address something in this chapter that I've yet to see Heartland address.
Chapter 35: Names, Stars, March Build and Girls' Night Out
By the third week in February, the two dressing tables had been delivered. Mitch worked on them during the last two weeks of the month putting his finishing touches on them as a special gift to his girls. He decided he'd better keep the workshop locked til time came to move them, but he also covered them just in case.
One day in late February when Amy picked up Lyndy from school, she could tell Lyndy had been crying, and she seemed dispirited, definitely not her usual happy self. Amy asked her what was wrong. Lyndy seemed hesitant to say, but the hurt welling up inside her that needed to be let out finally won. She was trying hard not to cry again, "Mama, one of the kids at school today said I wasn't really your daughter because we have different last names. I told her that wasn't true, but I didn't know what else to say. Is it true we don't have the same last name?"
Amy was taken by surprise and realized that this was also a conversation she and Mitch needed to have.
"Sweetheart, when Da-da and I got married, of course our last name was Borden, but because so much of my work was already tied to my maiden name…that means the name I had before I got married…I've continued to go by Amy Fleming with anything related to work. So that's what most people know me as. But you know what, before Mitch and I get married, I guess we all three need to have a conversation together about what our names will be. Let me talk with Mitch first, and then we'll all talk together."
That seemed to satisfy Lyndy for the time being, but Amy realized she needed to figure out just what name she was going to go by. She also wondered how Lyndy would feel about Mitch adopting her, though she didn't want to say anything about that to Lyndy until she'd talked with Mitch about how he might feel about it. And, she needed to figure out just how she felt about it. However, she knew the choice, in actuality, was up to Lyndy and Mitch. She thought on it for the remainder of the week.
On their next date, she brought up to Mitch what had happened with Lyndy at school, and she asked him, "Mitch, are you open to the idea of adopting Lyndy if that is something that she wants?"
Mitch tried to conceal the smile that was wanting to break over his face when he responded, "Amy, I'm so glad you asked. It's definitely something I've thought about a lot, but I was hoping you would bring it up first. I absolutely would love to adopt Lyndy! But only if she is ok with it. I know she loves Ty, and I would wonder how she'd feel about losing that name connection. And how do you feel about that for yourself?" he asked secretly hoping she was willing to take his name, but he wanted her to have the freedom to choose what she felt was best. And from Amy's viewpoint, she felt honored that he wanted to consider both hers and Lyndy's feelings.
Amy thought for a moment and responded, "Like I explained to Lyndy, keeping Fleming was easier because of work, and it didn't seem to matter so much to Ty. I'm not sure why, as we never really talked about it, but perhaps it was because he never felt much pride in his family. However, now with such a big shift about to happen in our lives, and a new name for our ranch and my business, maybe it's time for a change. I told Lyndy we'd talk with her about it, but here's what I'm thinking. I drop Fleming, and with my name change on paper, it becomes Amy Borden Cutty, and maybe we do the same with Lyndy's name – we add a second middle name for her – Lyndy Marion Borden Cutty. Then that way, we both still have the tie to the Borden name on paper, and we still honor our history with Ty, but the three of us are all Cuttys. It would also mean that, should we have any more children, Lyndy would have the same name as her siblings. I'd still want to make sure Lyndy is ok with this, but what do you think?"
The fact that Amy had referred to children plural did not escape Mitch's notice and caused his heart to skip a beat, though he kept that to himself for the moment. He then said, "Amy, I can't tell you how much that means to me, but we'll do whatever makes you and Lyndy feel the best. At the same time, I would love for you both to be Amy and Lyndy Cutty!"
They agreed they felt good about the potential plan. They would talk with Lyndy soon and finalize a decision. If Lyndy felt good about Mitch adopting her, he would get that process started soon so that, hopefully, they could have an adoption and stone-naming ceremony as first importance in their new home soon after returning from their honeymoon. Amy also realized that they'd still have their Borden names tied to the stones in the fireplace at Heartland with it's history. So her heart felt at peace as long as Lyndy's would be as well.
Mitch and Amy's wish for the weather had come true. The last two days of February, the weather had turned unseasonably warm and was most welcome! Mitch had read that there was to be a meteor shower at the end of February, so he suggested that they all bundle up taking Lyndy along with plenty of hot chocolate and watch it together. Amy was all in for that! They also thought it would be a good time to talk with Lyndy about what name she wanted to have and the possible adoption. So the night before Mitch's parents were to arrive, they drove up to one of the meadows and did just that. It was a gorgeous, clear night, and the stars glistened like brilliant diamonds against the darkened sky and looked like you could almost reach out and touch them! They spread out a large blanket in the back of the truck, put Lyndy between them to be sure she stayed warm and star-gazed together. They counted at least twenty falling 'stars' between the three of them. Lyndy was thrilled!
Mitch marveled rhetorically, "God's wonders are awe-inspiring, aren't they?"
Then he related a special memory of his. "Lyndy, did you know that I have a memory similar to this? When I was a little kid, one morning very early, around 3am, my parents woke me, bundled me up, and we went outside on the ranch to watch a rare comet pass by. It was called Halley's Comet.* It's due to come again in 2061 or 62, so you very likely may be able to see it in your lifetime. I didn't realize it so much at the time, but looking back now, it was amazing to witness history happening that night, something that Doc and Ginny knew could be a treasured memory for my life!"
Lyndy listened intently as Mitch told the story, then she said, "Mitch, thank you and Mama for making this memory with me tonight. I will always remember it!"
"You are welcome, Sweetheart! We're so glad it is a clear night so we can actually see the shower," Mitch replied.
They brought up the name discussion, and Lyndy felt good about their suggestion for her name, being very relieved that they'd all have the same last name. When they brought up the possibility of Mitch adopting her, she asked with a tinge of worry in her tone, "Does that mean that Da-da would no longer be my daddy?"
Amy responded, "No, Sweetheart, he will always be your daddy, but since he can't be here with us anymore, in the eyes of the laws of our country, Mitch adopting you would give him all he needs to fully be your daddy now here together with us, and it allows you to be a Cutty."
Lyndy felt satisfied with Amy's answer, and she turned to Mitch and said, "Thank you, Mitch, for being willing to be my daddy. I can't wait til I can really call you that!"
Mitch teared up a little and hugged her close to him saying, "Sweet girl, I can't wait either, and I can think of no greater honor than to be your daddy. Thank you for letting me be." And Lyndy turned her head to kiss him on the cheek. Amy was misty-eyed at their pre-father/daughter exchange, just another treasure to add to that growing number in her heart.
As they watched the shower together, they sang 'Catch a Falling Star,'** and Mitch and Amy knew this would be a moment long remembered by all of them. Amy also recalled how precious her memories such as this were with Grandpa. It had turned out to be the perfect setting to have the sensitive discussion with Lyndy on top of making a very special family memory. She was so grateful Mitch had suggested it, and she would be sure to show her appreciation to him later.
The morning of February 28th, the Cuttys arrived at Mitch's ranch so they could be prepared to start the barn remodel early the next day. Mitch was really pleased to get to host his parents for a whole month, though he knew that his mom would end up doing most of the 'hosting.' He was so grateful that his mom's health was doing so well. He also planned to keep his dad on the ground as far as the building went, but it boosted his confidence having his dad's help and expertise on such an important project. Ginny was elated to get to spend the month with her only child. She'd missed him being around and loved that she'd have one more chance to spoil him a bit before his life changed forever. And she was looking forward to any time she could get with Amy and Lyndy and any of the family.
Mitch did make sure that he and Amy had time to make a trip to town that afternoon to start the paperwork on his adopting Lyndy. It appeared they were starting it soon enough for it to be completed around the time of their return from Nashville. He'd told his parents after they had arrived, and they were over the moon happy about it!
Earlier in February, Mitch had sought out a contractor to look over his plans just to be sure he hadn't missed anything before starting. The contractor had been impressed with the eye and knowledge Mitch had in drawing them up. He'd only made a couple of suggestions for tweaks, so on March 1, work began. Amy tried to get by as often as she could to see how things were progressing and often to swing a hammer herself. She also knew it was the only way she would get to see much of Mitch during the month. There were times her breath would catch whenever she caught a glimpse of Mitch working with only a Henley or T-shirt on. He was so very handsome and strong, so evident in the ripple of his muscles as he worked! And she couldn't be thankful enough that he was doing all this out of his love for her. It was hard to believe that the wedding was getting so close, but they were grateful to be busy as it made the time pass quickly. Jack and Tim came over a couple of different days each to help out when they could. Caleb also helped several days. Peter's limited time needed to be spent with Lou and Katie when he was in town, but he did make it over one day. It was a good time for him and Mitch to work together. Zeke and Charlie were there day in and day out to aid with the building anytime they weren't doing ranch chores. Many hands made the work proceed on schedule.
Amy was able to get the wedding invitations*** in the mail at the beginning of the month. The wedding dresses came in, and fittings were done for the gals who were present. Georgie's fitting would need to be last minute, so they wanted to be sure that all the others were completed ahead of her arrival. All agreed that Amy looked absolutely radiant in her gown, and it fit her perfectly!
The first Saturday in March, Lyndy came to Whispering Meadows to spend some time with Ginny. They made chocolate chip cookies together, and just as they were taking the last batch out of the oven, Mitch came in for a break. When he smelled the cookies, of course he had to sample them with some milk. As he did, he gave Lyndy a hug and said, "Sweetie, I've not had a chance for us to be together without Mama around to say thank you so much for the cookies you and Lisa left me in my cookie jar. They were a most scrumpdiddlyumptious surprise when I came in that afternoon and found your sweet note!"
Lyndy giggled at Mitch's big made-up word describing the cookies, and said, "You're welcome, Mitch! We had a scrumpdiddlyumptious time making them."
That brought a laugh from Mitch and a wink from Lyndy as Mitch answered, "Well, it was very thoughtful of you and Lisa. And you are doing a great job of keeping our secret!"
Lyndy looked a little puzzled that Mitch had said anything about the surprise in front of Ginny and whispered, "It's been kind of hard, but I'll be so excited when we can finally show Mama my room!"
Though Mitch hadn't even had time to look at it yet, he asked, "Have you shown it to Ginny yet? It would be ok to if you'd like. I think she can keep our secret, don't you?"
Lyndy looked at Ginny, and Ginny shook her head yes as she pretended to zip her lips. So as Mitch headed back out to work, the next few minutes of their time together was spent with Lyndy giving Ginny a tour of her room. Ginny was quite impressed with what she and Lisa had done and joined in Lyndy's enthusiasm about surprising Amy.
Ginny thought to bring the magnetic paper doll set with her from home for them to play with and brought them out. She'd also picked up another set to be able to leave with Lyndy. That made Lyndy genuinely happy, and she said, "Thank you, Ginny, for thinking of me. I really like them!"
"You're most welcome, Sugar! Maybe you'd like to leave them here at Mitch's so they'll already be here when you move in?"
"Great idea, Ginny! When we finish playing, I'll go put them in my closet. They will be my very first thing to put in my room! And I won't say anything about them to Mama yet, since they'll be in my new room."
Ginny was so very happy to get to spend some time with her soon-to-be granddaughter! As they were playing, Lyndy said, "Ginny, when Mama and Mitch get married, does that mean that you and Doc will be my new grandmother and granddaddy?"
"Why yes, Lyndy, it does!"
Lyndy turned with a perplexed look on her face and said, "What should I call you then?"
"Well, what would you like to call us?"
"Hmmm…" she said seriously thinking as she tapped her chin. "Do you think Gram-Ginny and Papa Doc would be good names?"
"Ooooh, I like those names, Lyndy! I think Doc would, too," Ginny smiled as they high fived each other.
"I can't wait til I can call you that," Lyndy said wistfully.
"I look forward to that time, too, Sweetheart. It won't be long now," Ginny said as she squeezed Lyndy tight but gently in that kind of hug that grandmothers give.
There were a few times that Amy was over during the month that, instead of working on the project, she'd helped Ginny, and it not only provided them further bonding time, but Ginny was able to teach Amy how to make a few simple dishes. It bolstered Amy's confidence in the kitchen a lot, and she was very grateful that she might now be able to help Mitch out a little more with feeding their family in the future. That was an area that still felt a bit daunting to her. They had some special conversations covering subjects like Mitch's childhood, what it had been like for Ginny and Doc when Mitch was in Afghanistan, Ginny's recovery from her stroke, some of the things Amy had gone through in losing her mom and Ty, and regrets about growing up most of her early life without her dad, but how grateful she was to have him back in her life. She also shared some about the hardships Ty had faced growing up and about Lily. Ginny shared some things from her past and about hers and Doc's families immigrating from Scotland a generation before. They were both really thankful for the extra time they could spend together before the wedding getting to know each other even more.
A couple of times, Mitch and Amy had a ZOOM meeting with the DJ they'd secured to share specific things about each person in the wedding party, to learn how Mitch and Amy met, and to learn some of their background so that he would be able to introduce each one at the reception in a very personal and special way to the wedding guests. He came highly recommended**** as one who would give a particularly personal touch to the reception.
They also met once in person and once by ZOOM with the minister. Even though Amy had already been married, it was Robert Hise's custom to meet with any couple he was going to marry to know them better in preparing for the ceremony and to counsel them. They all wanted to cover anything that could be helpful to them as they began their life together, and Mitch and Amy came away very appreciative for the insights he was able to give them on their marriage and everyday life together.
As things had been so busy over the last several months, one day in mid-March, Lou decided the girls needed a night out that Saturday. Jack and Tim were herding cattle for a few days, Katie was at a sleepover at Parker's, and Peter was in Vancouver. So Mitch volunteered to keep Lyndy while the girls went out to enjoy some time away. Mitch arrived around 5pm, and Lyndy raced to hug him.
"We get to have a night with just you and me, Mitch!" she exclaimed as she released him from the hug and looked up at him with a big smile.
"I know! We're going to have fun!" he replied.
Lou had a lasagna in the oven for them to have for dinner. Amy, Lou, Lisa and Jessica planned to meet Cass and Jade at a nearby pub for a night of food, girl-talk and line-dancing, and they would pick up Ginny on the way. As they left, Mitch gave Amy a sweet kiss and hug telling her to have fun! After another day hard at building, he was looking forward to a relaxing time with Lyndy.
The girls left in a flurry, and Mitch found the French bread and garlic spread left for them and got their bread ready to go in the oven. He also discovered Amy left them a salad in the fridge. They felt well-taken care of. While dinner was heating, Lyndy pulled out Go Fish! and Chinese Checkers for them to play after dinner. Mitch also spied Jack's guitar in the corner. And Lisa had recently bought Lyndy the 'Anne of Green Gables' trilogy which Lyndy had sitting on the coffee table. Mitch had never seen the movies, but he thought they could at least knock out one of them before bedtime.
As they sat down to eat, Lyndy started telling him all about her room as she'd been dying to talk about it with someone besides Lisa and Ginny! And who better than Mitch since it was their secret. She was especially exuberant in describing to him the tree branches with the twinkling lights!
'I really do need to take time to go upstairs and check out what they've done!' Mitch thought.
He was delighted that she was so excited about it and that she conversed with him so easily. He hoped that was a sign of things to come. She moved on to what she'd done that day and her week at school. Of course, Cody's name came up once again. She really seemed to like that little boy!
As they finished, Lyndy helped him clear the table, put food away and wash and dry the dishes. From there, they moved back to the dining room to play the games. They decided Chinese Checkers was a favorite one of theirs to play together. At about 6:45, they started the first movie of the trilogy. Mitch enjoyed it much more than he'd anticipated and determined that they might have to finish them with Amy. They especially liked the part where Anne died her hair green. He was a bit surprised that Lyndy made it through the movie without falling asleep, though her little eyes were showing signs. He suggested that they sing for a while with the guitar. After they'd finished 'She'll be Comin' Round the Mountain' and 'Lavender Blue, Dilly Dilly,' Lyndy asked Mitch, "How much longer is it until you'll be my daddy?"
The continued encouraging questions about becoming her daddy still caught Mitch by surprise as he answered, "Well, Lyndy, it's about thirty more sleeps. Tell you what, how about you go get ready for bed, and while you are, I'll find a marker, and we can mark it on the calendar in your room before I tuck you in?"
"Ok, and will you sing me to sleep?"
"I'll happily sing you to sleep, Sweetheart!"
At that, Lyndy scampered off to get ready. Mitch found a marker and took the guitar with him to Lyndy's room to wait for her. When she came in, Mitch first asked her to show him her teeth. She flashed them to show how clean she'd gotten them, then they went to the calendar and circled April 15th and marked off the current March date. Mitch laid the marker on her bedside table so she'd have it to mark off the day each night. As she climbed into bed, she didn't lay down, but sat up in the bed as if she wasn't quite ready to quit talking. She looked at Mitch with a furrowed brow and apprehension in her eyes and said, "Mitch, when you become my daddy, are you going to fall down on the ground and leave me like Da-da did?"
Mitch was stunned! His heart broke at the question, and a lump formed in his throat. It was then that he realized that Lyndy had witnessed Ty collapsing. It took Mitch a moment to recover, and to buy a little time, he reached out and enveloped her delicate hand in the strength of his, "Sweetie, I wish I could promise that would never, ever happen. It's not likely, and I will always do my best for it never to. You do know that your da-da didn't want to leave you, right?"
With unshed tears that had welled up in her eyes, Lyndy slowly nodded her head yes. "Sweetie, this I can tell you…it is always my wish never to leave you, and I know it was your da-da's wish as well. Lyndy, he loved you so much, and he will always be in your heart, just as you will always be in mine."
And at that point, Mitch knew exactly the song he wanted to sing for her to fall asleep. He said, "Lyndy, I love you so much, Sweetheart. There's a very special song that I'll play for you, and we'll consider it a song from Da-da and me to you. Give me a hug goodnight, let's get you tucked in, and then I'll sing it for you."
With that, she gave Mitch a bear-hug as if she didn't want to let go and a kiss on the cheek. As she slid down in the bed, he tucked her covers in around her, kissed her forehead, then began to play 'Goodnight, My Angel.'***** As he played, gentle tears silently trickled down Mitch's cheeks. As Lyndy fell into a comforting sleep, Mitch kissed her head and quietly closed her door. He was shaken and had to regain his composure as he wiped his tears. Mitch thought to himself, 'Ty, I have no idea if you can hear me, but I promise you and God that I'll take care of your little girl and do my best to never leave her before she can comprehend the reality of life's cycle.' He felt sad that Ty was missing out on raising his beautiful little angel, yet simultaneously felt so very grateful for how blessed he had become with circumstances allowing these two precious souls in his life!
When the girls returned a couple of hours later, Mitch had fallen asleep on the couch. His sleep was stirred by all the happy chatter. Amy spotted him and came over, sat down beside him, and gently ran her fingers through his hair as he tried to fully wake up. Her fingers felt soothing, yet he still felt a bit somber with how the evening had ended.
Mitch sleepily asked, "Have a good time?"
"We did! And did Lyndy wear you out?"
He half-smiled and still a bit groggily replied, "I don't think it was Lyndy that wore me out. I just think the week's work was catching up to me," as he pulled off the blanket that had been covering him and began to sit up sliding just past Amy sitting beside him but wrapping his arm around her waist as they hugged cheek-to-cheek.
He didn't want to put any kind of a damper on Amy's night, so when she walked him to the door, he said they'd talk more later, and they kissed goodnight, her sending him off just thinking that he needed a good night's sleep.
The next morning, as the house began to bustle with activity, Amy got to ask Lyndy how their night had gone. Lyndy related their evening and all the fun they'd had and about them marking the days off on the calendar til the wedding. In the process of sharing, she mentioned them singing, and that they'd talked about Da-da, and that Mitch sang her a special song from both of them. Lyndy couldn't recall the name at the moment but mentioned it was a lullaby. Amy made a mental note to ask Mitch about it later.
Since they'd had so little alone time together the last few weeks with the build and all the preparations, Mitch and Amy decided to go on a date the following Saturday evening. They went to a restaurant in a nearby town. It was a good time to catch up on everything and go over their checklist for the wedding. Amy let him know that she'd enlisted Lou and Lisa's help in making the honeymoon arrangements after making sure they knew some of the things particularly to include. They'd missed each other terribly, and they determined that they'd do this each weekend until the wedding, as they really needed to stay connected.
As Mitch pulled up in the driveway to bring Amy home, she remembered to ask him about the song he'd sung to Lyndy. Mitch realized they'd not yet talked about what happened. He knew it was going to be hard, but he also knew it was something he needed to share with Amy. Mitch took a deep breath before he began to relate to Amy what had happened. As he did, all the feelings once again overwhelmed him, and as Amy's eyes began to cloud over, they both fell into each other's arms and cried together for several minutes – tears of sadness over the loss of Ty for Amy and Lyndy, sadness at Lyndy's fear of losing someone else she loves, grief for all Ty was missing, yet the mixed tears of joy for all they now had together. It was an emotional time of two hearts letting it all out in oneness.
As the tears gradually subsided, Amy said, "Mitch, I feel like a horrible mother. Until you telling me this, I'd never thought about the fact that Lyndy having seen Ty collapse was etched in her mind. She's never said anything about it to me, but I should have thought to ask and been aware of what she was thinking."
Mitch took her hands in his and said, "Amy, please don't be so hard on yourself. You were dealing with such deep sorrow. You can't blame yourself that you didn't catch everything that was going on around you. And you've done so very much right with Lyndy. Let's just be grateful that it has finally come out, and maybe now is the best time to look for a time to talk with her about it."
Once again, Amy took such comfort in Mitch's wise counsel. She leaned into him, resting her head on his shoulder and said, "Thank you, Mitch, for so often seeing the good in a situation." Then she pulled back, looking him in the eye and said, "You know, I recall hearing the song you sang to Lyndy, and it is the perfect lullaby for Lyndy from her two dads. I'm so glad you thought to sing it for her. I'd love for you to sing it for both of us sometime. I'm so grateful you were able to ease her mind with the question that was worrying her."
Though they knew it likely would not be the last time that situations like this came up, they were grateful to be sharing the load of it together. They both were well aware that grief was an odd thing – it reared its head at the most unexpected times—sometimes hearing a song, smelling a smell, seeing a picture, or a memory coming to mind—washing over one as a small breeze or sometimes as a large wave of emotion. It was part of life. For them, it would especially always be a part of theirs, but they also knew that the life ahead for them held much joy, happiness and laughter, and they felt great anticipation for their day to arrive to begin it together with no more saying goodnight at the door!
A/N: *Halley's Comet – I took some liberty in timing here with Mitch. He may not have actually been old enough to have viewed Halley's comet and remembered it in 1986, but it is a fond memory I have of my husband and I doing this with our kids when we drove out very early one morning into the Arizona desert to view the comet. I also was unable to determine if it would have been visible in Alberta in 1986. And I don't know if a meteor shower in Alberta would coincide with this time in my story, but we are pretending. ;-)
** "Catch a Falling Star" – Written by Paul Vance and Lee Pockriss. Perry Como recorded the best known and most famous version released in late 1957.
*** Wedding invitation – Mitch and Amy's wedding invitation, as well as a link to the songs mentioned, will be posted on the following three Facebook groups: Kevin McGarry Fan Page Home of #McGarries and SuspendersUnbuttoned Podcast; Nathan Grant Fanfiction! Home of Sunday Night Serge; and The Heartie Analyzers: All things Kevin McGarry, KEVLA and WCTH.
**** DJ – For my son's wedding, we had the most professional and fun DJ ever, Peter Merry! A link to a couple of his Facebook pages and a link to one of his books will be posted on the same groups mentioned above.
***** "Goodnight, My Angel" has been a favorite song of mine ever since I first heard it sung by Celtic Women. Such an emotionally touching lullaby! And then I was surprised when I learned it was by Billy Joel written for his daughter. There is a version on YouTube sung with acoustic guitar by Drew Fredrickson, if you'd like to listen to it and imagine it being Mitch singing it to Lyndy.