Chapter 5

Arizona stepped out into the drizzle of Seattle having just unpacked everything she owned into the 2-bed house. Her life as predicted had changed beyond recognition, no longer was she a hot shot Doctor, the one to watch, or beat, instead she was a full-time carer to her brother, her life was about triggers, and avoiding them.

Tim sometimes, was exactly how he had been before he had left to serve in Iraq, happy and easy going, then there were the triggers. A traumatic brain injury combined with PTSD meant at any moment he'd have a flashback, and when he did, he became aggressive.

It had caused a lot of problems in the Robbins household. Daniel thought Tim should be in a specialist recovery unit, a military one that would practically order him better. And he had tried, frequently resorting to screaming orders at Tim until he either hit out or curled into a ball and cried. Neither was healthy, and Arizona having visited the military unit knew it wasn't the right fit. All the patients there were either restrained or drugged into submission. There was a reason it was called the vegetable patch.

Ultimately Arizona had the final say, and she didn't want her brother to go anywhere. She had moved with her parents bringing Timmy home, but Daniel's nit-picking meant there was a lot of arguments and that was a trigger. But Arizona held firm, Tim was home and he deserved to stay at home with family.

It had only taken one bad episode and Daniel had refused to have him home, at least in the family home, while Barbara was desperate to have him and broke into tears, Daniel held firm. Tim needed specialist care. As soon as he knew Tim could be aggressive, he didn't want him near his wife. Arizona had the opposite, Tim was finally home, he needed to stay at home with family. She'd been in long term care facilities as a medical student. She knew they called it a vegetable garden, that aggressive patients were left sedated, for months, years on end. Not fed, lying in dirty pads, physically, sexually abused. Tim was not going to be one of those patients. It was fine, she didn't need her job, her family, she was a good man in a storm, she was a trained doctor, everything was going to be fine.

She could cope with his aggression, with his PTSD, he was still Timmy. And he was getting better and less aggressive as one by one they identified the triggers.

As well as suffering from a shortened fuse, and being more aggressive than normal, Tim was also easily distracted struggling to complete even the most basic of tasks. It wasn't unusual for him to get frustrated as he struggled to do up his buttons, or as his hand shook when he ate. This would lead to frustration and violence. Arizona tried to reduce the triggers, buying clothes without buttons, making food that could be eaten with fingers. Moving to the dreariest place in the USA where it drizzled most of the day as hot, dry weather seemed to trigger him more.

His memory also suffered, some days he struggled to recognise Arizona, or recognise himself in the mirror, Arizona had removed nearly all the mirrors in the house, leaving only one in her bathroom, she also made sure she always said her name and her relation, trying to reorientate him.

His judgement was also off. Tim thought nothing of walking through the house naked or removing his clothes at inopportune moments. Hence the house in the woods, away from others. It was safer that way, less complaints. Less chance of anyone else getting hurt.

In the day they worked on his neuro rehab. Trying to improve his hand eye co-ordination, and for the most part it worked and there was measurable progress each week. Not that everything was perfect, when Timmy got frustrated, he often hit out, and Arizona was often the target, she got good at dodging flying plates, and other household items. It was just occasionally when he would reach out and grab her holding her tightly, leaving bruises down her arms. Often, she could calm him, singing worked well. Tim's favourite band had been Queen, so when he grabbed her, she started singing, and most the time it worked.

It was a car backfiring that really sent him spiralling, to Arizona it was loud but to Timmy, it sent him into a full flashback.

"Tim, it's me, you are safe, can you let me go" Arizona begged, as her brother held her against the wall.

"No, guns" he moaned, squeezing tighter, rocking slightly, but not letting go,

"Tonight, going to have myself such a good night" Arizona sang horribly off key.

"No" Tim screamed letting go of her right arm grabbing her left twisting her to the floor. Arizona screamed as she felt her arm pop out of its socket.

"Tim, let me go" she begged,

"Zona" he suddenly released her, "No, no" he cried curling into a ball hitting his head with his hands. Despite the immense pain in her arm Arizona sat.

"Hey, it's okay, I'm okay, accidents happen" she soothed rocking him, until he settled. "Tim, I need you to stay here and watch tv, I'll be back in a bit" she said putting on the Disney channel pleased to see there was a goofy marathon. Since his TBI, Tim had been watching a lot of cartoons, they were designed to be simple and for people with a short attention span. It kept him occupied for hours at a time, Arizona often used it when she needed to go out grocery shopping or to take a shower.

With her brother fully occupied Arizona left the house getting into her car glad it was an automatic as she struggled to get the belt on.

She drove to the free clinic at Seattle Grace, her health insurance had an expensive premium on it and relocating a shoulder should be simple enough. Arriving at the clinic Arizona carefully manoeuvred out of the car, her shoulder really painful.

"Hello, what seems to be the problem?" the nurse asked as she reached the desk.

"I think I have dislocated my shoulder." Arizona said wincing.

"Okay fill out this form and take a seat" the nurse ordered. Arizona obeyed filling out the minimal details she could get away with, her arm too sore to really write. She paused on the address, desperately trying to recall where their new place was. With her brain failing her she wrote down a previous address, was it Boston? Or Florida? Arizona couldn't remember but figured this time there wouldn't be much follow up. As soon as she got it relocated then she could go home and check on Tim.

"Robbins" an intern called, Arizona stood moaning as her arm that was now dislocated and stiff protested at the movement.

"My name is Stephen; I mean Dr Roberts" the intern greeted. Arizona fought the urge to roll her eyes instead just smiling politely, interns, they always seemed so young and this one was no different "what seems to be the problem?" he asked,

"My shoulder, I think its dislocated" Arizona replied, in truth there was no thinking about it, it was most definitely out of its socket, but she knew some doctors got funny if their patients self-diagnosed.

"Okay, can I?" he asked, gesturing to her shoulder, Arizona nodded, biting her tongue to stop herself from screaming as he poked roughly,

"Hmm, I'm not sure its dislocated, I'll get an x-ray to make sure" he suggested, Arizona nodded, holding her breath, he was an intern, he is learning she reminded herself wondering if she had ever been that incompetent, knowing she hadn't. "I'll ask a nurse to help you change into a gown for x-ray" he offered leaving the cubicle. Arizona only had to wait a few seconds before a nurse came in.

"Hey hun, let's get you changed" she offered. "We just need to slip your jumper off and your bra, it shows up on the x-ray".

Arizona nodded slipping her good arm out of her top, as the nurse helped her move the bad one.

"Oh hun" the nurse commented. Arizona tensed remembering the bruises.

"It's not like that, I do self-defence" Arizona lied, although technically it was self-defence, with her brother,

"We can help you know; we have organisations and counsellors that we can refer you to, we can call the police, you don't deserve to be treated like this" the nurse offered.

"It was self-defence lessons" Arizona lied again,

"Oh hun, well when you decide he isn't worth it, we can help. Let's get you to X-Ray now" the nurse helped put the gown on, and aided her into the wheelchair, before pushing her to X-ray. Once there Arizona was pleasantly surprised that she was shown straight in, she could see her X-ray and spotted the dislocation straight away. Now she could only hope the intern was capable of spotting it.

The nurse wheeled her back to bed. Arizona found numerous support leaflets there all for victims of domestic violence. Rolling her eyes she put them to one side, that wasn't her. She wasn't a victim.

Stephen returned, looking sheepish.

"Mrs Robbins, your shoulder is dislocated, he said blushing, Arizona fought the urge to say anything. I told you so came to mind, instead she gave a polite smile. "Don't worry, I'm going to pop it right back in" he reassured,

"Have you ever done this before?" Arizona asked.

"No, but I watched Dr Torres once, she's the best" the intern promised, without warning he grabbed her dislocated arm and tried to yank it into position. Arizona screamed, as the bone dug in without clicking in. He released it causing Arizona to cry, tears running down her face.

"Stop" the nurse came in, "out" she ordered the intern. "You do not relocate a shoulder with no pain relief, with no warning. I am so sorry hun, let me page Ortho for you. I'll ask Dr Torres to come down, don't worry she is the best" she hit his shoulder shooing him out, "She has suffered enough" she warned, reaching for the phone.

Arizona sat on the bed cradling her arm, wondering if she should leave, if this was the level of competence at the clinic no wonder it was free. Just as she was about to leave the curtain opened, a sexy, brunette stood in front of her, bangs framing her face, a white lab coat covering light blue scrubs.

"Arizona Robbins?" she asked, Arizona nodded, her mouth going dry, her heart rate increasing. Dr Torres was exactly her type. If she was in a bar Arizona knew she'd be flirting something awful with her, but right now she was in far too much pain to even think about it.

"Yes, Dr Torres I presume" She asked, smiling making sure her dimples popped. She could tell they were having an effect as the brunette flushed, before frowning as she noticed the bruising. Self-consciously Arizona tried to pull the gown down to cover them, knowing it would make no difference.

"What happened?" Dr Torres asked, as the bright light shone in her eyes. It was a step up from the intern, who hadn't even acknowledged her other obvious injuries, despite the improved care Arizona sighed, only Dr Torres's warm smile kept her going.

"I do self-defence lessons, sometimes it gets a bit intense, today I was twisting out of a grip and felt my shoulder go" Arizona lied again, watching Dr Torres bit her lip, wishing she could bite it for her. Dr Torres was sex on legs. If only she wasn't caring for Timmy full time, then she'd be chasing her. Dr Torres moved Arizona caught sight of her lab coat. Calliope, what an amazing name. Arizona wished she could say it out loud and hear it roll off her tongue, but that would be creepy.

"Okay, but if that's not the truth, then there are other organisations that can help you," Calliope offered. Arizona nodded, wishing she could take her help, if nothing else to spend longer with her, but that wasn't her, she wasn't a victim of abuse. She had everything under control, as long as she learnt Tim's triggers, she could avoid them, and everything would be fine. A car backfiring was unusual, it wouldn't happen again, so this wouldn't happen again, she reassured herself.

"Thank you, but I don't need help, everything is fine" Arizona promised, watching as the brunette sighed, "Or it will be when my shoulder is back in, please tell me you are more competent than that intern" she begged seriously, Calliope grinned, Arizona bit her lip wincing as it jarred the cut. Dr Torres might be sexy, but when she smiled, it was like the whole world ceased to exist. Her smile was awesome, beautiful. She was beautiful and smart and talented. Arizona was crushing big time.

"I am, first we need to give you some analgesia, I'll write some morphine and we can give some Entonox".

"Entonox only," Arizona begged, "I need to have a clear head" she needed to get home as soon as her shoulder was in. Tim couldn't be left for long periods; he could hurt himself or wonder off. He could get frustrated or hungry. Anything could happen and this was already taking much longer than Arizona had figured.

"For your self-defence lessons?" Calliope asked, raising her eyebrow. Arizona nodded,

"Exactly" Arizona agreed, giving Calliope a full-blown smile complete with dimples. She knew her smile disarmed everyone, it had gotten her out of lots of pickles and she wasn't afraid to use it. Not having an argument, or perhaps just letting her win, Dr Torres handed her the Entonox, gently taking her arm. Arizona took a few deep breaths, trying to consciously relax her arm. Which was easier said than done considering the beautiful doctor was touching her and electricity was racing from those contact points sending her heart racing.

"On 3" Calliope warned, Arizona groaned as the pain intensified before feeling the satisfying clunk as it fell back into joint, she tried to keep breathing the gas.

"Great you did it" Arizona praised, giving her shoulder a slight wiggle, now it was in there really was no reason to stay. She had to get home and check on everything,

"Wait, where are you going?" Calliope asked, gently placing her hand on Arizona's good shoulder. Again, Arizona felt the tingles.

"home" She replied shrugging. Although she wasn't an orthopaedic specialist it was in.

"Not yet, I need Xray's to confirm its in and you need a sling" Arizona rolled her eyes at the delaying tactics, sure an Xray was best practice, but she didn't want to leave Tim any longer than she needed to.

"Look we both know it's in, we both heard the clunk, the pain has eased, and an X-ray is just a formality, we both also know you brought a sling with you when you came down, and if you put it on I can be on my way in less than a minute" she argued, knowing she was right, a repeat X-ray was just a formality.

"I'd still like an x-ray" Dr Torres insisted, her hand ideally stroking Arizona's arm.

"I understand, but I really need to be going now" Arizona replied, picking up the sling.

"Self-defence lessons to get ready for" Dr Torres replied, taking Arizona back. She gave her a sad smile, if only she knew, if only she could see past the bruises, then maybe they'd have a chance. It was ages since Arizona had last flirted with a beautiful woman, even at Hopkins all her hours had been taken up by revision. Still, she helped with her sling, gently brushing her hair, sending tingles down her spine, Arizona shivered hoping Calliope didn't notice.

"Seriously, Arizona, if you need help, all you have to do is say," Arizona smiled sadly, again,

"I'm okay Dr Torres, I don't need help, everything is fine, everything is under control. Thank you for your help" Arizona said, as a way of trying to reassure the brunette she hugged her tightly, hoping that would ease her worry before making her way out of the clinic, she needed to get home to Timmy. God knows what he would be doing.

Thankfully he was exactly where she had left him totally absorbed in the cartoons.

"Hey Tim, are you hungry?" she asked, wondering what she could cook one handed. He nodded,

"Hungry" he repeated.

"I bet, do you fancy chicken nuggets and chips?" Arizona asked, it was probably one of the easiest foods to cook.

Tim nodded, "Chicken" he repeated.

Arizona walked to the kitchen, she could do this, today was just a blip, after all how often did car exhausts backfire in Seattle anyway?

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