Robert walked to his dressing room. He heard voices coming from Cora's bedroom. Edith was there. He was relieved to know Edith was talking and did not hide away in her room. Mary had come down to him in the drawing room. He was surprised when she walked in, but he had been thankful, nonetheless.
Her news about Matthew had cheered him up immensely. Matthew could be his potential successor. He could see it in his minds eye, him teaching Matthew everything about Downton. He knew Mary had always been interested, but due to his own fault. She had gone in a different direction, and with Cora's help, she started her own business.
He had made so many mistakes, so many. First, with his darling Sybil. Was Tom really that bad for her? As Cora had pointed out so clearly, they were not living in 1920 anymore. The class system was not that important. Of course, Sybil would have to learn to live a less luxurious life. But maybe she did not mind? She had never been the one to care for nice dresses or new shoes. To be fair, Mary was the only one interested in those things. He wondered where that came from, Cora had never raised them that way. They only got new clothes when needed, and Cora herself never bought very expensive things. Of course, she had a couple of designer dresses, but because of their title, they had to attend special dinners and events.
His Cora was known for her sustainability. She would wear dresses to multiple events, and she did not care about gossip.
He also made a lot of mistakes with Edith, even though she never gave him that feeling on purpose. He just knew she never really talked with him. It surprised him she was now talking with Cora. Was there a boy in her life? Or maybe a girl. He felt chills run down his spine. Would he be able to accept that? He did not know. He had to admit to his own shame that he always had been sure they would marry a man. He shook his head. That was not something he needed to think about now.
Bates entered his dressing room.
"Bates, I have to thank you ." He turned his back towards Bates so he could take his dinner jacket.
Bates raised his eyebrows. "Why, Milord?"
"I can understand when you want to go and work somewhere else."
This made Bates laugh. "We are friends, are we not?"
Robert turned back towards Bates. "I hope we are. Of course I pay you and officially I am your employer. But I see you as a friend and these last weeks you have been an exceptional good one."
"What will you do once her Ladyship has left this house?"
"I guess just go on with every day. I have to, there is no other option. This estate will need attending."
Bates nodded but did not say anything.
Robert paused and looked at him. "Bates, please tell me what you mean."
"Is Jane coming back."
"What!" Robert said brusque.
"Are you sure you have not thought about that?"
"How dare you. Jane was a mistake. A big one that has cost me my life. I may be lucky if I do not lose my girls, too. That woman will never be back here. NEVER." That last word Robert shouted.
Bates did not back down or step back. He had provoked on purpose. He needed to be sure Jane was history. "Good, Milord. I am happy to hear you say that."
Robert sunk on his bed. "I am sorry, I should not have reacted that way."
"I understand. Good night."
Robert saw Bates leave. He should get in bed, but he was too restless to sleep. He needed a drink, he needed it badly.
He had waited a while before heading down again. It took everything in him not to walk into Cora's room and sleep next to her. It was so hard to know she was back home, but that it was only temporary. And what hurt him the most was that she did not see this house as her home anymore.
He had robbed her of her home. No! No, that was something she did herself. She could have forgiven him. But of course, she was being headstrong. He had always loved her strength to stand up for herself. The times she had defended herself against his mother without losing her temper. But now he had hoped she would accept that people made mistakes. He was a human being who made a mistake. Did she never do anything wrong? Her part in this debacle was maybe as big? He scolded himself. Her part was not as big. Her being distracted had started it all. But no, he was the one who strayed.
Before he realised it, he was standing in front of the liquor cabinet. He bent down to get the bottle of whiskey. Just when he wanted to poor his glass full, he heard a woman's voice.
"Is that wise? Milord?"
Robert turned around in shock. Mrs. Hughes was standing in the doorway. He saw her walking over, and she put her hand softly on his arm.
"Why do you not go to sleep?"
"If I could, I would be asleep right now. Just one drink."
"I am not the one to stop you, but I will advise against that one glass." Mrs. Hughes took the bottle. Robert let her. "I will ask Mrs. Patmore to make you a cup of hot milk with anise. That should help you to fall asleep. Can I do something else for you?"
Defeated Robert looked at Mrs. Hughes. She was just 3 years older than he was, but he always had respected her immensely. She was a wise woman. Robert shook his head. "No, thank you." He said soft.
"Good night."