I bolted down Beck's street, keeping an eye on the time. Not that it would really matter whether I got home in the next two minutes or two hours — mom already caught me in a lie.
She's going to kill me.
I wasn't sure how I could make up a believable lie to cover for my other lie, but I'm usually good at being clever on my toes. It would probably be better to not overthink anything now. Save it for later.
Think about something else. Distract yourself. Look at the houses you're passing or something.
The structures were an interesting hodgepodge. Every home on Beck's street was unique in its own way — that's not necessarily a compliment. All of them were small, but some were in desperate need of renovation, and others in desperate need for a custodial crew. I guess I'd never paid attention to how much less affluent this area was — I don't think a single one of these places was worth even a fraction of my parents' house. Well, I guess Mom's house now.
I know it's not cheap to live in Los Angeles; Beck's neighbors must be closer to the bottom of the barrel.
As I got closer to my street, the houses started reflecting the wealth of those who resided there. One, I recalled, was owned by an ER doctor - he had a magnificent pool in his backyard. Another, a well established lawyer with a garage full of classic cars.
Another row of houses later, I reached my own.
The door hadn't even fully closed behind me before I heard a ripping—
"JADE WEST—"
"Jesus!" The shout of my name made me jump in my own skin. Rounding the corner to meet me at the door was a face of maternal fury.
"Where have you been?"
"I already told dad: I went mini-golfing with Cat and her brother," I said as naturally as I could.
"Uh-huh. And then you told your father that Cat's brother would be dropping you off here. So I stayed up for hours waiting for you to come home last night, and when you didn't show up, I sent texts and tried to call you — no answer! And now here you are twelve hours later wearing someone else's clothes. What am I supposed to make of that?"
I hadn't thought about the clothes. The flannel shirt definitely fits in my new wardrobe, but it wasn't mine.
"Oh my God, Mom, we just went back to Cat's house. We were all tired and her house is closer to the mall, so I stayed and crashed the night there and borrowed some clothes to wear this morning. It's not that big a deal."
"It is a big deal! You can't say you'll be dropped off here and then never show up with no heads up! I've been worried sick — don't you get that?"
"My phone died! I couldn't have texted you even if I wanted to. What do you want from me?"
"I would like for you to be more responsible, Jade. I mean," she raised her shoulders and looked off to the side "maybe your Dad has the right idea after all. You've been so moody and disrespectful and distant lately. You don't look like the daughter I know— I'm still trying to get used to that— you don't act like the daughter I know—"
"Oh, you mean ol' Sweet Sally Peaches? Your spineless, compliant, and perfect little girl? She's long gone."
"And has been gone pretty much ever since going to Hollywood Arts."
Panic arose in me again. My tone shifted from resolved to desperate.
"Mom, no. That school isn't a 'bad influence' on me, or whatever Dad thinks. My friends get me there and they're real! I wouldn't have any real friends at Northridge." Even the school's name felt unwelcome in my mouth. "Besides. Has it not crossed your mind that maybe it's not Hollywood Arts that's turned me so bitter? It's not like you and Dad have exactly been 'perfect' influences either."
"We were never perfect, but we didn't teach you to become this." She gestured to all of me.
"Will you quit overreacting? God, I'm sorry for one mistake and for being a bit 'moody' lately. Sometimes I just forget what a joy it is to be in this family."
Why don't you take a hard look in the mirror, Mom? Recognize that some of this is your fault. Feel fucking bad for me.
"Here. If you're missing baby Jade so much—" I reached to my scalp and began unclipping my hair extensions "— take these. I won't be able to wear them for dress rehearsals or during the run of the show anyway."
I dropped the chunks of pink and blue hair into her hands.
"Wow, looky there. Boring brown hair that I was born with — no punk pink or bitchy blue. Does this magically make me your 'good little daughter' again?"
"Cut the attitude, then it's a step in the right direction. Still, a change in scenery might actually do you some good."
To say my heart sank would be an understatement.
"Change in scenery? What do you mean? You don't mean Hollywood Arts."
In my panic again, Mom's expression softened a little. I feared that this conversation was going to make a drastic turn.
In a less accusatory tone, she said, "Your father and I have been thinki-"
"No. No, Dad said that he would let me stay if I could prove that I'm good enough. And when he sees the show in a couple weeks he'll see that I'm good enough! You know how important the arts are to me, how could you even think to take this away from me?"
"There's still a drama club and choir at Northridge-"
"Are you serious? Those are just extra-curriculars filled with talentless nobodies — I wouldn't be able to grow as an artist there! You'll see how much better my acting and singing has gotten being at Hollywood Arts. I need to stay there. God, or do you also think I'm not talented enough?"
"Of course I do. I was the one who took you to your audition in the first place and got excited for you when you got accepted. But-"
"But what, then?" I scoffed. "That's all there is to it. If I'm good enough to be at Hollywood Arts then I should be at Hollywood Arts."
"It's not that simple anymore, Jade."
"How on Earth is it not?"
I was willing to fight to the death on this front. I wouldn't care what Mom or Dad's "reasoning" would be; I would find a way to combat it.
"It's not a regular, public high school, dear."
"Yes, that's like the whole point."
"For your school to put on all the recitals, plays, and musicals that they do, they need funds to afford all the props, makeup, costumes, and set design. Where do you think all that money comes from?"
What in the world is she going on about?
"I don't know, tax payers? I don't see how that matters though."
"It comes from your tuition. Every student at Hollywood Arts has to pay the school's tuition in order to attend. Having talent is necessary, but it isn't enough — that's just reality."
"I still don't see the problem. I'm already going to the school, how can money be the problem now?"
She let out a stressed breath, reluctant to be frank with her teenage daughter.
"With two incomes, it's manageable. But with your father gone and not on board with this whole arrangement and currently jobless… we just can't afford it anymore. The material fees alone cost $400 — that wouldn't happen at any other high school."
"Bu– how can you not afford it? You just remodeled half the house, didn't that cost money? A-and all my new clothes and room stuff." A lump swelling in my throat made it hard for words to escape.
"If I had been smart, I wouldn't have bought all those things either. They were impulse purchases – distractions. But all of those things were one-time payments. We're talking about another three and a half years of LA tuition… we just can't make that work."
"That's crap. You're telling me I have to quit the one thing I care about because we're poor now?"
"We're not poor, Jade. We'll get on just fine without making a bunch of unnecessary purchases. And you need to realize how privileged you are to have been able to go to that school at all – there are plenty of kids in California who will never be able to attend. For once, I wish you'd be grateful for what you do have."
"Grateful? How can I be grateful when I've spent the past three months working so hard to be the perfect student and perfect Wendla for Spring Awakening? I-I've shown up to rehearsals early, I rehearse outside of rehearsals just so maybe Dad thinks I'm good enough on stage to stay. And now you're telling me I don't even get that chance? That I bent over backwards for nothing?"
I didn't know how it was possible, but my head and heart both felt hollow and heavy at the same time. I was both a mile away and impossibly here. At any moment I could fall down or float away. It was incomprehensible.
"It wasn't for nothing," she started, not that I cared for her assurance. Nothing she could say would make me feel any better unless the words "Gotcha! That's what you get for making me worried sick last night. Of course you're still going to Hollywood Arts!" left her mouth.
I didn't stick around to hear her try to make me feel better. Making sure to bump shoulders with her, I pushed past to go upstairs to my room. She might have called after me. I didn't know. I didn't care.
All I could picture now was me leaving the school, leaving the stage, leaving Cat, Andre, Robbie, and Rex, leaving Beck. If I lose Hollywood Arts, I could lose everything.
My my my. I've been on hiatuses before, but this one takes the cake. If you're still here reading this - HELLO!
to I've had the rest of this fic outlines for quite some time, but was always reluctant to get started, so I forced myself to sit down and spit out this short chapter just to get the ball rolling again.
If you're hopping on this chapter without having read the previous ones recdently, I (of course) recommend to maybe re-read some of them. I foreshadow and plant quite a few seeds that will come to fruition in the chapters yet to come!