Year of Cobert
January – fake dating AU
rating: K+
...
She was his favourite person in the world. She held such a very special place in his heart. So logically, he wanted her to be happy.
The sad look on her face Robert caught the last time he visited her, was engrained in his brain. It troubled him when he tried to go to sleep at night and sometimes, it followed him into his dreams. The countless wrinkles on her face told the many stories of her long life, and Robert always enjoyed listening to the experiences she told him of in her warm voice. But the last time he had been in her living room, the shadows that lay beneath her wrinkles only told of all the lost things she couldn't have anymore.
This picture of her, which just wouldn't leave his mind, prompted the resolution he made one sleep-deprived morning. He had an idea of how to make her happy. But he needed someone's help.
…
"Oh no! I'm so sorry to hear about your grandma!" Cora's empathetic face looked at him across the table at the cafeteria.
Robert wanted to say that it was alright, but it really didn't feel that way. He stayed silent and lowered his gaze. His hands wrapped tighter around his mug of hot coffee.
"I know you love her dearly," Cora spoke very softly as if her words were a warm, tentative hug. When Robert looked at her again, she tilted her head to the side and a look of worry filled her big eyes. Robert nodded. The big lump that formed in his throat prevented him from talking.
"If there is something, anything really, I can do for you, please tell me," she insisted gently.
Robert cleared his throat awkwardly. "Well, … actually, there is."
"Oh?"
"Yes. Grandmama mentioned something like a last wish. Well, not really a last wish, but something that would make her very happy and would make it easier for her to go peacefully," at the last word, Robert's voice caught and he had to press his teeth together tightly to stop from drenching his voice in unspilt tears.
"And I can help with that?"
Robert nodded to buy himself some more time and recollect his wits. He couldn't break out in tears in front of Cora. "You might."
…
His dear grandmama was sick. She said it wasn't too bad and it shouldn't be sad because she was 'old enough'. Robert thought differently. It wasn't her time to go at all, but the stomach cancer she had been diagnosed with was already in a late stage. No curative therapy, only measures to make it 'more bearable'. For Robert, it wasn't bearable at all. He didn't want to imagine a life without the presence of his sweet and supporting grandma, and he didn't want to imagine her suffering.
He visited her more often since he knew about her bad health. She was very intent on keeping their moments together as light and warm as ever. She was very good at that. The last time, though, Robert had seen some gloom shine through. He was devastated when he learned that, at least partially, he was responsible for the unhappiness she experienced in her final moments on this earth. He needed to fix that.
…
"Wait, what?" Cora shook her head in disbelief. "You want me to pretend to …?"
"Only for one afternoon."
She looked at him warily. She spoke slowly and appeared careful as she asked her next question. "And why, if I might ask, would that help you? Or her?"
Talking with Cora distracted Robert a bit from his worries and it became easier for him to talk without tears threatening to cascade down his cheeks. "Because that was her wish," he said.
"It was her wish that I pretended to be your girlfriend?"
"No, of course not. She…" Robert took a deep breath. He knew it was a crazy idea and he hadn't really looked forward to presenting it to Cora because maybe she would tell him it was stupid. But she was his last resort. Robert had thought about every possible way of dealing with it, and really, there weren't many. She was probably the only way to ensure his grandmama's happiness at this point.
"She said, it saddened her to see me alone and to never be able to see the one person I ended up with. She had so wished to meet the person I would spend my life with." Robert's eyes drowned in the cup of coffee in his hands. He couldn't look at Cora while he spoke.
"She confessed to me that in the last years, the vital part of her life consisted of following and supporting my life – well, and Rosamund's, too – and making sure it was a happy one. And that is true. I never realised that. My grandma would answer the phone day and night when Ros and I had struggles or worries. She was the one to help us make anything possible we wished for. No matter, whether it was getting me into the college I dreamt of or getting Mama and Papa to accept Marmaduke once he and Ros got serious. We are our grandma's life content, and apparently, she secretly wanted to help me find a wife at some point." Robert chuckled, but it was more a sign of helplessness than of amusement.
"I don't want her to be unhappy because she never saw me happy in a relationship," he explained. He lifted his head now and looked at Cora again. "I want to help her feel that she didn't miss out on that life goal she has, apparently."
"And you don't want to show her the woman that really will spend her life with you?"
Now, Robert laughed genuinely. "And who would that be? I don't think there is a sensible woman who would choose to spend her life with me. Who, pray tell, would do that?"
Cora looked a bit weird. She chewed on the inside of her cheek and she seemed strangely hesitant to Robert. It irked him that he couldn't read her at the moment. Because what he liked about her was how clear and open she was. He could nearly always tell how she felt about something just by looking at her. As a result, the more it made him uneasy when that wasn't the case.
"Anyway," he said. "I totally get that this is all too weird for you. You don't have to do it. It was just an idea I had."
"Oh, we can do that!" Cora quickly agreed. She pressed her palms onto the tabletop and leaned forward in his direction. "We just have to come up with a plausible backstory and make sure we're not contradicting ourselves. Maybe make up some codewords."
She nearly seemed enthusiastic about the whole thing, and Robert was slightly surprised by how well this seemed to go.
"Wow, you seem to have done this before," he joked.
"Oh, always. There hasn't been a week where I didn't pretend to be someone's girlfriend to make their grandma achieve her life goal." There was a sparkle in her eyes, and Robert almost felt a happy mood wash over him.
He didn't know it but Cora was more nervous about today's date than she led on. When they walked up the driveway to old Mrs Crawley's house, Cora's palms got sweatier and sweatier, even though, she felt she had already perspired all water from her body. That was why she had opted for looping her arm around Robert's and resting her hands loosely in the crook of his arm instead of holding hands with him. He didn't have to know that she was nervous.
They had agreed that they wanted to appear like a real couple, so a little display of affection here and there was a given. Cora was happy about that. But also nervous. This felt much more real than was good for her sanity. And at the same time, she was filled with a sense of sadness about the old woman they were visiting, Robert's grandmother, who was dying. When Cora saw Robert's face that was painted in all the uncomprehended and devastated emotions, she felt herself getting teary-eyed and bleeding-hearted, too. Her mother's voice rang loud in her head, "Oh, Cora. You know there is something as being too compassionate." Maybe Cora knew, but she couldn't help herself.
The house Robert's grandma lived in was a cute cottage with a roof covered in moss and it made Cora immediately adore her even more. Not long after Robert had rang the doorbell they were greeted by a middle-aged woman clad in light green scrubs who Cora quickly realised had to be an outpatient nurse looking after Mrs Crawley. She smiled at Robert; she must know him quite well. Then, she stepped to the side to let them in and threw a curious look at Cora.
"Hello, Jenny," Robert greeted. He let go of Cora's arm and helped her out of her coat. He didn't look at her but continued conversing with Jenny, the nurse. "How is Grandmama doing? Is she awake?"
Cora felt Robert's fingertips brush over the bare skin at her neck as he gathered her coat to put it on a hanger. Cora was very focused on not letting him see her shiver because she shivered for all the wrong reasons. This wasn't appropriate. Focus, focus, focus, she told herself.
"She is fine today. She is waiting for you in the living room," Jenny said.
"Thanks."
Now, Robert looked at Cora again, and she hoped the heat in her cheeks wasn't too obvious.
"Ready?" he asked her and held out his hand. Cora hadn't even noticed how he had slipped out of his own coat and stood before her in a crisp white dressing shirt now. The muscles of his chest and shoulders shone through the thin fabric in such a dashing manner. Cora nodded and took his hand. It was warm and comforting.
Robert walked her into the living room. It was a cosy space with a lot of antique furniture. His grandma sat in a big armchair, a woollen blanket over her lap and a cup of tea in her hands. She put the tea down on a small table nearby when she noticed Robert and Cora entering. There was a standard lamp behind grandma's armchair that bathed her in a warm light. It made her look younger than Cora had pictured her.
The smile on grandma's face before she opened her mouth had something so familiar and caring that Cora almost felt it was her own granny she was visiting.
"Well, there you are." Her voice was just as warm as Cora had imagined. "My dear boy."
Robert let go of Cora's hand at the old lady's words and approached her to take her into his arms carefully.
"And who have brought with you?" Grandma asked and smiled at Cora.
"That's Cora, my girlfriend I told you about," Robert explained. He turned around, looking at Cora, too, now. Cora felt her nervosity come back as she was mustered by the two and her cheeks felt so burning hot that you could nearly fry an egg on them.
"Wow, look at you," grandma said and swatted Robert's arm lightly. "And I thought you would show up without her because you actually made her up. Come here, Cora. Robert, would you get the tea from over there? I already prepared it on the table to your right."
As Robert went to get the tray with the tea, Cora made her way to his Grandmama.
"Hello, Mrs Crawley. I'm very pleased to finally meet the great lady Robert always talks so much about." Cora held out her hand and the elder lady shook it gently with an amused smile grazing her features.
"Oh, no 'Mrs Crawley'. I'm Grandmama and that's all that should be of any importance to you, my dear. And I can only give back the compliment. I am happy to meet you, Cora. Only I wished Robert had told me even more about you. Your existence has been a secret to me for most of the time, I have to admit."
The awkward clattering of china behind Cora indicated that Robert listened very closely and rather anxiously to how the conversation between the two women was going. Now, he cleared his throat, preventing Grandmama from elaborating further.
"Well, you're getting to know her better now, Grandmama. Would like some more tea?"
"Yes, dear." Grandmama reached out her half-empty cup for Robert to give it a refill. After pouring them two some tea as well, Robert patted the settee across from Grandmama and silently asked Cora to sit down by his side. As soon as she settled into her place, Cora felt his warm palm on her knee. She was the tiniest bit surprised at how well he seemed to remember the affection part of their prepared plan, but she couldn't help but smirk. She blew her hot tea, and Grandmama already continued talking.
"Well, you two definitely look fine together. A beautiful couple." She nodded and allowed herself a pause to cough into her napkin, a strained expression taking over her face.
Cora felt Robert's fingers tip a quick rhythm on her knee. She looked at him and saw how he was torn between giving his grandmama some time and jumping to her aid. Hesitantly, Cora put her hand on his and tried to give him some reassurance.
"Pardon me," Grandmama said when the coughing fit had subsided. "But tell me more about you two," she encouraged them. "How did you meet?"
Cora felt Robert straightening beside her and she knew he was mentally preparing his speech with the facts they made up beforehand.
"Cora and I met at college. Well, kind of. I met her at the library where Cora had her student job at that time and I did some research on my thesis. She always sat at the counter right at the entrance and I saw her every time I walked in. I was a bit of a fool when I was looking for the right books for my thesis and I didn't find anything with the strange way the location of the books is coded, so I asked Cora for help." While he was talking, Robert's fingers slowly curled around Cora's hand on top of his. "It became like a ritual every day I went to the library that I came up to Cora with my list of books and we went and got them together. It went so far that I even made up more lists than I actually needed books for my thesis."
Grandmama chuckled at Robert's story.
This far, it was mostly what really happened. Cora still remembered Robert's overtaxed look when she had tried to explain the coding system for the location of the books to him the first time he came up to her counter. That was how they first started talking. But the made-up lists were definitely part of Robert's own creative spirit. They didn't prepare it beforehand but it also wasn't what had happened in reality.
"And you were charming enough to not put this lovely woman off immediately?" Grandmama asked with a cheeky undertone.
"Apparently," Robert answered and looked at Cora with an expectant look.
It took Cora a second to register that this was probably her cue.
"His confusion was actually adorable," Cora said and laughed, hoping Grandmama didn't catch the nervosity. "And he was always very polite about every query he had. You know, I often had to deal with students that weren't the least bit as insightful as Robert. It was a great change and it probably drew my attention to him pretty quickly. So, yes, he was charming enough to not put me off straight away but it took me the multiple times he asked me out for coffee and how he had been so insistent on wanting to get to know me more to really fall for him, I guess."
That was the one condition Cora had. She was totally fine with playing his girlfriend for an afternoon but she had requested that in the story they made up about their fake relationship, Robert was the one fighting for her affection. After all, he was the one who needed this relationship at the moment.
"Oh. So, Robert, you had to prove yourself a little? I'm sure that's done you some good," Grandmama resolved. Cora smirked at her. She guessed, she really liked Grandmama.
"Well, you told me the fine women won't swing by when I simply whistle. For the right woman, I have to put in the effort," Robert gave back.
"Oh, I see you listened," Grandmama said and her eyebrows travelled up her forehead in slight surprise. "I wasn't so sure you did when I told you. But I see that I raised you right. I assume you gave Cora a bit of courtship, so now she knows she gets what she deserves when she's with you." Grandmama turned to Cora as she continued speaking, "I taught Robert the most important things to make a woman happy," she explained. "Does he bring you flowers regularly?"
Now, it was Cora's job to improvise. She quickly looked at Robert who had a slightly mortified look on his face at his grandma's question. Of course, he had never brought her flowers.
"Oh, every Sunday," Cora said with a wide smile. "Whenever he goes to get rolls from the bakery, he also comes back with a sweet bouquet of fresh flowers. I already wondered if he might get some kind of discount when he gets them every Sunday."
Grandmama laughed out loud.
Cora looked to her side and saw Robert's cheek colour a nice shade of red.
"And does he cook for you sometimes?" Grandmama posed her next question.
"Yes, he does." Cora didn't even need to improvise for this. When Robert and she sometimes met up on a Thursday or Friday evening, he often invited her to his flat where he had a nice risotto prepared for the two of them. Sometimes, Rosamund would come, too, and they would play some random board games.
"He makes the best risotto," Cora assured. She turned to Robert, and out of sudden braveness, she lifted her hand and stroked his cheek praisingly.
"I am glad to hear all that." Grandmama seemed content. "And one last question. Most importantly," she looked back and forth between Robert and Cora, and maybe she saw how they both were on the edge of their seats, waiting to get the final approval that their relationship would pass the test. "Does he listen to you when you speak your mind?"
Robert turned his head and looked at Cora even more expectantly than Grandmama.
"Obviously, he does," Cora said. "He cares about what I think and how I feel, and that was what set him miles apart from everyone else right from the start." A certain sense of ease washed over Cora as she said that. It was as if she had lifted a secret and now that it was out and her cards lay open she was as relaxed as never before.
Grandmama reached out for Robert's arm. "Good job, boy."
…
Everything was a lot more laid-back from that point on. Grandmama urged both of them to eat at least two pieces of cake she had Jenny buy for them. She herself couldn't eat any, so she asked Robert and Cora to 'eat some for her, too'.
Robert told Grandmama that Cora makes the best chocolate cake, which was not only an improvised story but also an outright lie. The one time he had tried a piece of some chocolate cake she had baked, it tasted horrible because she carelessly switched the sugar with salt and since she had to go to the dentist that day, she hadn't tasted the dough before baking. Robert had been so sweet when he had awkwardly tried to tell her how bad it tasted in the politest and most ginger way possible.
But as he told the story to his grandma now, he left out all these parts and only told Grandmama what an amazing baker Cora was. He even rewarded Cora with a kiss on the cheek, maybe a payback for her stroking his cheek. Cora couldn't complain.
When Grandmama seemed to get more tired, Robert tried to wrap things up. He thanked his grandmother for the nice afternoon and said how glad he was she finally met Cora.
"I am very glad, too, my boy." She patted his shoulder. "Would you just be so kind as to bring the plates into the kitchen?"
"Sure." Robert gathered the plates, and Cora stood up to help him by taking the cups for him.
"No, not you," Grandmama made clear. "Robert can do it for today. Women clear the table often enough."
So, Cora sat back down and let Robert finish the work by himself. When he left the room, Grandmama waved for Cora to come a bit closer.
"You're a very nice girl."
Cora smiled and brushed her hair behind her ear. "Oh, thank you!"
"I know Robert wanted to show me today what I want to see. He wanted to present me with the perfect relationship so I don't have anything to regret."
Cora felt her heart sink into the pit of her stomach. She suspected bad things.
"I know you two might not be as serious as he tried to lead on. Maybe you two don't live together in the apartment he described so vividly over tea and cake," Grandmama chuckled genuinely amused. "I'm a bit surprised he didn't make up an engagement with the great effort he put in today. But maybe he wants to save this moment up for when it's really time for you two. It's wise he didn't spoil that moment for you," she pondered. "But anyway, even if he asked you to adorn your story a bit here and there with facts, he thinks might please me, I see how good you two are for each other." She took both Cora's hands in her cold and weak ones. "Just let me tell you; savour it, the special something you two have, alright?"
Cora nodded totally transfixed.
"You're a–"
The door to the hallway was thrown open and Robert barged in, unaware of what was going on inside the living room.
"Everything's settled in the kitchen!" he announced. "We don't want to overstay our welcome now, Grandmama."
"Well, it was a pleasure having you two."
They said their goodbyes to Grandmama who then was accompanied to her bedroom by Jenny. Robert's eyes followed his grandmother and the nurse up the stairs while he helped Cora into her coat. Then he put on his own and asked Cora as they left the house, "What did you talk about when I was in the kitchen? What did Grandmama say?"
Robert pulled the door shut behind them and Cora mustered the copper sign under the doorbell that said 'Mary Crawley' in an old, classic lettering as she buried her hands deep in her pockets.
"She said how happy she was for us."
Robert turned around and paused a while as he looked at Cora. "Good. I'm so glad it worked that well." He started grinning at Cora. "I'm really sure she believed us."
Cora nodded weakly. Robert hooked his arm into hers and set down the front door steps. "Yes, she does believe in us," Cora whispered into the wind that welcomed them on the driveway.