AN: Long time reader, first time writer. Quick rundown of what to expect, to save the time of anyone not interested:

This is a story about the harsh realities of becoming a Pokémon trainer in a more dark, realistic setting that really explores the daily struggles and hardships a trainer might face in a world with dangerous creatures, criminals, and a domineering Pokémon League.

It will contain mature themes such as swearing, politics, poverty, ethics, crime, violence, death, and whatever else the story calls for. I promise it won't get TOO edgy (SA, self-harm, racism, homophobia, etc.), but consider this your only warning that things WILL get dark at times, and there will be NO trigger warnings. Romance will never be a central theme, and any that does occur will be brief and nondescript.

Canon will be respected where possible but consider this an AU with some tweaks for realism and due to it being a bit in the future.

Sacrifice & Subjugation, Borne of Caution, Pedestal, and IJWTTTW are examples of what I'm hoping to achieve, and I thank their respective authors for their inspiration.

The first handful of chapters will move a bit slowly, but things will quickly pick up after foundation is laid. If I still have your interest, thank you for giving the story a chance and I hope you enjoy.

"Miss Augustine! Daniel won't share the computer!"

I groaned in annoyance, trying to quickly scribble down notes from the research I was currently doing on the shared computer in the common area of Petalburg's orphanage. On the screen was a labeled map of Mauville City, and I was currently noting its various points of interest as well as the commonly seen Pokémon in the surrounding area.

I only had a few moments before I'd be kicked off for the night, so I was furiously scratching down notes while staring at the screen, something I'd had plenty of practice doing for the past two years. This was a common occurrence; there was only one computer available for the nineteen kids living here, and it was considered a very valuable commodity. The internet was absolutely terrible and the computer was extremely dated, but for the purposes of flipping through wiki pages and forum threads it got the job done as long as you had patience and were dealing with text and images, but videos were simply a no-go.

A shrill voice rang out from the other room. "Daniel! Wrap it up now! You're always on that damned thing, give Freddy his turn!"

I closed my notebook and all my open browser tabs, shooting a glare at the much younger boy who was now staring at me with his arms crossed and a smug grin on his face. I couldn't help but blow a raspberry in spite as I stood up and walked to my bunk bed before placing the notebook down alongside the others I had long since completely filled out.

Laying down in my bottom bunk, I kicked back and stared up at the bunk above, letting myself get lost in my own thoughts to drown the obnoxiously loud laughing, playing and arguing. I couldn't wait to leave, and although I was so close it still couldn't come soon enough.

It wasn't just this orphanage; I was completely over this whole city. I'd been in Petalburg every waking moment of my entire life, and there were few places that wouldn't remind me of my late mother. She was a kind and gentle woman; a single parent who always did her best to care for me despite her meager earnings providing cleaning services for various local businesses. My father was supposedly around when I was much younger, but I had no memories of him and couldn't rightfully credit him for anything in my upbringing. He'd died long ago of heart problems, leaving my mother the only one able to care for me.

Unfortunately, my mother suddenly passed away from an aneurysm just over two years ago, of which I had the misfortune of stumbling upon after getting home from school. With no other known family in the region, I was placed in the orphanage just a few blocks down from the cramped yet cozy apartment I'd grown up in.

I wouldn't necessarily say that I'm ungrateful; I could have easily ended up a homeless beggar and never finished school. But in a very real sense, I felt like a prisoner.

I'd always been a good student, having finished traditional schooling last year as a result of being a year ahead of others my age; something that happened long before my mother's untimely death. Naturally curious about the world around me, I'd always retained information like a sponge as long as it was even remotely interesting, which I found most topics to be. Standardized tests always came easy to me; even if you didn't remember the specific answer you could usually get it through process of elimination. Although my grades and social life definitely took a hit after I was relocated to the orphanage, I was still more than capable of finishing my last year without much trouble.

That left me with a year of waiting until I was legally of age to venture out on my own. Sure, I could have run away, however I had absolutely no money or supplies and I didn't want to risk resorting to crime and losing eligibility for my trainer's license. Although the accommodations of the orphanage weren't great, they did serve their purpose, and since I couldn't legally begin my journey anyways I really had no better option than to wait around for a year preparing as best I could.

I'd been using the time that school previously occupied as an opportunity to heavily study up on anything that might help me on my impending journey. My formal education didn't go too deep into the topic of Pokémon other than some surface-level things everybody should know, which meant I'd have to teach myself. Due to being one of the only kids that didn't need to go to school, I was able to accomplish quite a bit of research and preparation I doubted anyone other than those enrolled in a trainers' school could match.

Despite this, I felt depressingly behind other would-be trainers my age. Non-licensed citizens were allowed to possess non-restricted species, so long as they didn't use it in anything involving money such as tournaments, battles with bets, contests, and the like. By my age, many interested in becoming a trainer would have their starter Pokémon and had plenty of time to bond and train with them, whereas I was forbidden. The orphanage had a strict no Pokémon rule, and it wasn't as though I could afford to buy one or get a Pokéball anyway.

Perhaps if I had been able to do some side jobs around town I could have gotten one in secrecy. Once again though, there was something outside my control holding me back.

Miss Augustine didn't allow any under her care to work; she didn't even allow anybody to leave the property unless it was strictly for school or some other reason she personally approved, which was a rarity. She claimed that this was because of liability reasons, and because criminal organizations were known to coerce and recruit orphans in particular. She was extremely firm on not letting those under her care wander without supervision, and I often wondered if it had to do with some past experiences she'd had, although I couldn't be certain and would never dare to ask.

All of this resulted in my last year feeling like house arrest, and I couldn't help but feel some resentment. I tried my best to stay positive and look towards the future, but some days it was hard to be optimistic. I had no money, no Pokémon, almost no experience interacting with Pokémon, and none of the gear I would need for my journey.

Sometimes, I wondered if Arceus above was throwing all these curve-balls at me as a sign that I simply wasn't meant to be a trainer, but it was the only dream that kept me going and I held onto it tightly.

Needless to say, I was determined to overcome my circumstances. When I was young, I had always dreamed of becoming Champion. Although I had since grown out of that childish ambition, I still found the idea of being a free and self-sufficient roaming trainer to be extremely appealing.

More than anything, I wanted to find my place in the world. Although I didn't have any overly specific goals, I wanted to build a team of Pokémon I could call family, try my hand at the gym circuit and someday participate in the Ever Grande Conference.

I was now a week away from being 16, the current legal standard for being an adult in Hoenn. That meant that I was nearly free to leave the orphanage and would be able to obtain my trainer's license to begin my journey. I often dreamed of being born a decade or two ago, when the trainer's age was as low as 10. There were a few reasons it had been raised so high, but I couldn't help but feel a bit cheated.

On one hand you had years of public scandals, freak accidents, and new trainers being recruited into criminal groups that caused the public to demand the age be raised, again and again. On the other hand, the world was currently in its longest period of peace in recorded history. In the past becoming a trainer and going on your journey was considered not only a rite of passage into adulthood, but also your duty as a citizen. It was seen as a way to build lifelong connections with Pokémon and people alike that would lay the groundwork for the rest of your life. Not only that, but now having trained Pokémon to accompany you outside of human settlements was historically dangerous, but increased development of routes and ranger patrols had made it much less necessary.

It used to be that those who didn't undergo a journey were considered by most to be a rare and undesirable oddity; they were often seen as unpatriotic and lacking the attributes necessary to thrive in the world. These days, public opinion is much more evenly split, perhaps even leaning the other way. Only roughly half of Hoenn's new adults would get their trainers license, and even less believed in the tradition of going on a journey or attempting to complete the gym circuit. Many saw it as antiquated and dangerous, and argued that modern society no longer demanded the average person go through such hardships. There was an increasing segment of people who felt no need to train or battle Pokémon, and those who did often did so as a hobby. Many non-trainers would simply have a species they deemed as 'cute' for a companion, or for self-defense reasons if they happened to live in one of the particularly crime-ridden cities or found themselves needing to travel the routes..

The simple fact was, most trainers who got their license only did so to be able to have more than one Pokémon, or so they could do things such as Pokémon breeding, performing in contests, or challenge their local gym. The sad truth was that the number of trainers journeying or competing in the gym circuit was slowly dwindling, and every year there were less and less.

Although I could respect how somebody may not wish to live a life dedicated to Pokémon, I knew which side I firmly landed on.

Truthfully, it ticked all the boxes of what interested me in life. It would help fulfill my endless curiosity of the many places and things in the world, I would be able to be completely free and independent, and I'd have a chance at finding something I could call family.

I was doing everything I could not to become a pessimist, but it had been especially hard this past year. I had no family, no friends, very few possessions, and no meaningful purpose; just vague desires and dreams. Despite this, I did my best to remain optimistic and look at the bright side of things, hoping that things would be better once I became a trainer.

"SUPPER TIME!"

Miss Augustine's voice rang through the building, causing a near immediate stampede as children raced into the dining room to get in line for dinner.

I groaned, slowly swinging my legs off the side of my bunk and getting up, preparing myself for what was sure to be another bland meal.

"Mr. Ingram, so lovely to see you doing something other than staring into a screen or notepad." Miss Augustine said with a bit of snark. I gave a small bow in greeting, opting to keep my mouth shut. She could be a bit stern and blunt, but she was an overall good person as long as you didn't make her day any more difficult. Holding out my tray, she eyed me critically before plopping a scoop of brown rice, a scoop of beans and a slice of wheat bread onto the tray. Definitely not her best dish, but also far from her worst.

I nodded in thanks and began to turn to head for my usual seat in the corner, however I'd been a bit too slow getting in line and was the last one waiting to be served, which was a well-known mistake around here. I'd hoped that today I might be spared, but once again Arceus saw fit to make my life as difficult as possible.

"Your birthday is a week away if I'm not mistaken. Tell me Daniel, are you still obsessing over that barbaric tradition, or have you begun to make plans for meaningful employment and accommodations for when you are soon released from my custody?" Miss Augustine asked, one of her thick eyebrows arched in skepticism and judgment.

Stay calm Daniel. Only a week left.

I gulped, stiffening my posture as I turned back to face her. "Yeah, on the 12th. Still doing some last-minute research, but I'm ready for my journey."

Although I had learned to avoid confrontation with Miss Augustine, this was one topic I had always remained resolute and firm on. While she was by no means supportive, she never got particularly hostile other than a few slight jabs such as her occasional usage of words like barbaric and childish. I'd learned that as long as you didn't take personal offense and lash out, the conversation was never too bad.

She crossed her arms, leveling me with a look that bordered on a glare. "I'd hoped that you would grow up and put your mind to use on something more productive, but it seems it can't be helped."

I shrugged my shoulders a bit, careful not to spill anything on the tray I was still holding. "Won't forgive myself if I don't try. Worst case it doesn't work out, but at least I'll know I gave it my all."

That was a lie; I had no intention of giving up or pivoting if things got difficult. I knew what I wanted to do, and I was sticking to it. Still, I saw no reason to provoke her; even that simple shrug had the potential to incur her wrath on one of her more moody days, but it seemed today wasn't one of those.

She maintained her critical gaze and asked with what surprisingly seemed like a hint of genuine curiosity. "I see, and what of your starter, or your traveling supplies?"

"Hopefully my inheritance from my mom can get me going; get me a backpack, some basic supplies and a Pokéball or two. We'll see though… I'll figure it out one way or another." I responded truthfully.

She huffed and rolled her eyes, and my suspicions that she was done interrogating me were confirmed by a hand waving me away to dismiss me. I didn't complain; I went to my seat and began shoveling dinner into my mouth, feeling absolutely no desire to savor it.

As usual, dinner was a lonely affair. Though the room was packed and lively, others had long since learned to leave me alone. While always true to a certain extent, after my mother's death and arriving here I had become withdrawn and decidedly antisocial. I'd gotten into a few fights with some of the other kids, mainly over the computer, but occasionally because they simply wouldn't leave me alone. Needless to say, I didn't have any friends here, and the few friends I could have previously claimed to have at school were long gone.

I could have contributed this to lots of things; moving up a grade, not having a Pokémon, not being allowed to hang out with friends after school due to the orphanage's strict rules, withdrawing into myself after my mother's death, but those are all just excuses.

The truth was, I just never found anybody who I easily got along with. Social interactions felt largely forced to me, and I was perfectly content to occupy my time with thoughts of life after adulthood.

I suddenly ducked as a small ball went flying right above my head, a frequent occurrence for dinnertime.

"Damn it! So close!" A younger boy groaned at the other table, handing over his slice of bread as apparent winnings in some sort of bet while others in the group snickered in amusement.

"Thomas! Language!" Miss Augustine bellowed, causing the group to instantly settle down.

Just ignore it Daniel. One more week and you're free.

I promptly finished dinner and went to my bunk bed, flipping through my notes until Miss Augustine declared it bedtime. Kids shuffled into the room and went to their respective bunks, and a few minutes later Miss Augustine turned off the lights.

One day closer to being free, yet it still felt so distant.

"Mr. Ingram, you have a visitor."

I looked up from the webpage I was currently reading; an interesting first-hand account of a trainer who had inadvertently angered a pair of Tentacruel while ferrying across Route 124. Both him and his Wailord ended up poisoned without any antidotes handy, yet miraculously lived to tell the tale thanks to crossing paths with a more prepared traveler just as all hope seemed lost.

Miss Augustine was standing in the doorway with her arms crossed, looking at me with an expression I couldn't quite place.

I tilted my head in confusion, "Visitor? Are you sure it's for me?"

She rolled her eyes, "Don't be obtuse Daniel; they're waiting for you in my office. Hurry up, don't keep them waiting." She said impatiently, waving her hand dismissively as she went back to the laundry room.

I had genuinely no idea who could possibly be visiting me, but I closed the browser and grabbed my notebook before heading to her office. Typically, being called into the office was not a good thing; it was where Miss Augustine usually had some sort of criticism or reprimand to dish out, however rarely did she allow others to use it without her, so my curiosity was piqued.

As I entered the room, my heart skipped a beat and my mind went into overdrive as I immediately recognized Petalburg's Gym Leader, Norman. He was sitting at Miss Augustine's desk, seemingly flipping through a folder of information I could only assume was my file. He glanced up at me as I stood in the doorway, my mouth slightly ajar and eyes wide as I tried to process the situation.

"Daniel Ingram? It's nice to meet you young man. Please, take a seat." He said with a warm smile, which seemed to snap me back to reality. This was my first time meeting a trainer of a high caliber, and he was one of the top Gym Leaders in the region. I really wasn't one for idolizing famous trainers, however I can confidently say that this was my first time feeling star-struck. This was a man renowned for his strength and steadfast confidence, something that I greatly admired and one day hoped I could emulate in some small way.

"L-Leader Norman, it's an honor." I said shakily, offering the deepest and most respectful bow of my life before promptly taking a seat on the other side of the desk from him. Sitting here gave me flashbacks to verbal lashings I had received in the past, so a small part of me began to worry that he was here to try talking me out of my plans to embark on a journey. I didn't know if he would do that, but I definitely wouldn't put it past Miss Augustine to recruit him in an attempt to change my mind.

"Please, Norman is fine. I've never been one for formalities." He said kind-heartedly, waving it off dismissively. I nodded furiously, still a bit overwhelmed by the situation I'd found myself in.

"Miss Augustine informs me that you are preparing to begin your journey soon, is that correct?" He asked, causing me to gulp and nod cautiously as my fears began to be confirmed.

He must have picked up on my train of thought, because he seemed to come to a realization before letting out a quick and hearty laugh before continuing.

"Don't worry Daniel, I wasn't recruited to talk you out of it. I'm mostly here to make sure you know what you are getting into, and to ensure you are properly prepared."

I nodded slowly; was he going to quiz me or something? I knew that there wasn't anything that he or Miss Augustine could do to stop me; at least nothing that I was aware of. Once I was considered an adult I was free to make my own decisions, even if others might see them as a mistake. Still, I couldn't help but feel a bit anxious; if anybody could somehow stop me from becoming a trainer or journeying, it would be a Gym Leader.

I took a deep breath, composing myself before answering. "I've been preparing for it for years now, I'm as ready as I can be."

"Yet you have no Pokémon or supplies, even though you leave in a week." He pointed out very matter-of-factly, and I hesitantly nodded in confirmation.

"Tell me Daniel, what is it you hope to achieve?" He asked with genuine curiosity, seemingly tabling the topic for now.

I got the sense he wasn't against me, so I started to feel a bit more comfortable. I shrugged, "It just sounds fulfilling. Seeing the world, building a team you can call family, seeing the world while pushing yourself to overcome its rough terrain, overcoming trainers and the gym circuit. I can't say I have any concrete goals other than becoming strong, independent and free; I'm not so childish as to think I'll become Champion or anything like that."

Norman seemed to consider my words for a moment before nodding seriously. "That's a good attitude to have, but there's nothing wrong with setting your aims high."

"True, but nothing wrong with being realistic either. Someone once said that if you set your goals low, you'll never be disappointed." I supplied, eliciting a chuckle from Norman.

"Fair enough. Can you walk me through what you're thinking for your first few days? How you'll get a starter and what you plan to do after?"

I hummed to myself, considering how to word the answer. For all the research I had been doing, I didn't have too many concrete plans, although I definitely had some things in mind that I wanted to experience or try. I spent most of my time reading about Pokémon that interested me, what was in the routes and settlements of the region, and tips or first-hand accounts on training and survival.

"Truthfully, it depends on how much I get from my mother's inheritance. I don't expect much; she was a single mother and we were by no means well-off, but I suspect I should be able to buy essential supplies, including a Pokéball or two. I'll start by heading to Rustboro, and if I feel ready I might try the gym there, although I wouldn't be surprised if I ended up passing it up to come back later."

"Ah, so you plan on skipping my gym huh?" He said a bit teasingly, and I couldn't help but flush in a bit of embarrassment even if it was a bit off the mark. Gym Leaders were all at the elite level, and would dial back based on how many badges a trainer had, so I could just stay in the area and train up to beat his gym, but it wasn't what I wanted.

"I've been here my whole life; I don't really want to stick around longer than needed. I'll come back someday, but for now I just want to begin traveling." I answered honestly, and he nodded in understanding.

"As for a starter?"

I shrugged. "I'll just capture one of the local Pokémon; they are docile and weak enough I shouldn't have much issue."

Norman adopted a serious expression, and I worried I'd said something wrong. "Although the Pokémon in this area are about as beginner-friendly as you could hope to find, you should never underestimate a wild Pokémon. If you fail to capture it you could be attacked, and although I highly doubt you'd be left with any serious injuries you still need to be prepared for that possibility. I would definitely recommend trying to befriend a Pokémon to capture it willingly, but sneaking up on one would likely work as well. Just know that if you do that, you need to be prepared to run if it fails, and if it succeeds you'll have to work to earn its trust and loyalty."

I nodded in understanding, although none of this was news to me. Truthfully, I already had a plan for capturing my starter, but if I was honest with my idea it would complicate the discussion quite a bit, so I was going to keep it to myself.

Suddenly, I realized the implication of what he'd just said to me. Norman was giving me tips on capturing my first Pokémon, which meant he was definitely being supportive of my plans to journey. My eyes widened and I looked at him in a new light, my heart rate picking up as I eagerly waited for him to continue.

Norman seemed to notice that I'd caught on and grinned. "I've spoken to Miss Augustine about the importance of you having a reliable starter before entering Petalburg Woods, and she's agreed to loosen your restrictions for the rest of your stay. You'll still be expected to come back before sunset every evening, but you'll be allowed to leave the city during the day to begin your search. You need to understand that Miss Augustine is still legally responsible for your health and wellbeing though, so do your absolute best to stay safe."

That caused my mouth to drop in shock; I had not been expecting anything like this. It seemed that although Miss Augustine wasn't necessarily supportive of my journey, she was at least trying to set me up for success. I wondered how their conversation had gone, but decided not to push the issue.

"T-Thank you! That'll be a huge help." I stammered, nearly at a loss for words as I began to process just how big this was for me.

Norman gave a light chuckle, clearly pleased with my excitement. "Won't do you much good unless you're able to actually capture a starter, so you can have this."

He reached into his pocket and placed a minimized Pokéball onto the table, and I couldn't help but stare at it in reverence. It was brand new, with none of the slight indications of wear that balls who housed Pokémon inevitably began to show over time, so I knew it was empty. I'm not sure what my face looked like, or how long I stared at them, but I daydreamed about what they might look like a year from now; what Pokémon they might hold and experiences they might have gone through. It was honestly a bit overwhelming, and I felt the beginnings of a tear form in the corner of my eye that I quickly wiped away. Nobody had ever really given me anything like this, and to me this was a massive gift, although I knew that for somebody like Norman it was nothing.

"I… I don't know what to say. Thank you so much…" I slowly forced myself to say after realizing that I might have been lost in my thoughts a bit too long.

Norman before nodding. "Think nothing of it. I'd actually considered giving you a starter, but based on what I've gathered from you so far I feel like you'll do just fine capturing your own. Just remember; once you do catch something, make sure you only train outside of the city. Miss Augustine is very insistent on not allowing Pokémon on the property, and I suspect if you push your luck or break rules you may find your privileges revoked." He informed me, to which I fully agreed with an enthusiastic and serious nod as I grabbed the Pokéball and stowed it into my pocket.

"Drop by the gym before you leave if you find yourself woefully unprepared for Petalburg Woods; you need to have a good handful of potions and a few antidotes before you try making it through. I can also supply you with another Pokéball if your capture fails, but I'd be surprised if that was necessary." He offered, to which I agreed. I didn't plan on bothering him or asking for handouts if I could help it, but the gesture was kind.

"Well then, I've got a gym to run. Any questions before I go?" He stood with a stretch, seemingly done with what he considered to be a break, and I took that as my cue to stand as well.

My mind raced; I was being given the opportunity to ask a gym leader any question I wanted, and I had no idea what to ask. I went with the first thing that came to mind. "Any tips for journeying? I assume you went on one?" I asked, feeling a bit lame but genuinely curious. I'd read countless threads and 'top tips' online, but hearing it from a gym leader was another matter entirely.

He chuckled lightly before humming to himself in thought, "I had my journey long ago, but things were much different and I was much younger. Best advice I could give is to be cautious, keep your eyes open, and go with your gut." He opened the office door and ushered me out.

"Oh, and find a travel partner or two if you can manage it. Traveling can get lonely, you'll be safer, and it's useful to have someone to train and spar with." He added as an afterthought as he closed the office door behind us.

"I'll keep that in mind. Thanks for everything Norman, I really owe you one." I said with a deep bow and the most sincerity I could give.

"It's really no problem; this is one of the more enjoyable parts of my job. Just remember me if you ever make it big, and try to pay it forward sometime." He said with a nonchalant shrug. "It was a pleasure meeting you Daniel, don't forget to visit before you go. I'd love to meet your starter." He waved goodbye before moving to leave the orphanage, and I was suddenly immensely grateful that the other kids were at school and had not seen Norman here for me.

"I will! Promise!" I yelled behind me as the door was closing.

My heart pounded and my mind was in overdrive as I tried to think of what to do next; I apparently had permission to leave, and a Pokéball in my pocket to capture my first Pokémon. I sprinted to my bunk and put on my shoes before racing for the door, eager to take full advantage of the remaining sunlight. It was still early in the afternoon, so I still had a few hours of daylight left, but suddenly every moment felt precious.

"No running! Be back before sundown!" I heard Miss Augustine bellow from the other room as I closed the door and took off east.

This was it; the start of my new life. Although I still couldn't officially become a trainer or leave on my journey, I knew that today marked the beginning of a new chapter in my life. This was the moment I'd dreamed about for over two years, and it was time to start setting things in motion.

Now, I just needed to find a starter, and I had a very good idea of where to start.

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