NOTE: *Tentatively lifts the rock I've been hiding under for the past couple of months and peeks out* Sorry for disappearing for a while there, y'all. Life complications arose, ensued, and were overcome. Anyway, I'm back to it and will be returning to a semi-ish regular(esque) posting schedule. Stay tuned!

Chapter 14

Well, you see her when you fall asleep

But never to touch and never to keep

'Cause you loved her too much and you dived too deep

Well, you only need the light when it's burning low

Only miss the sun when it starts to snow

Only know you love her when you let her go

Only know you've been high when you're feeling low

Only hate the road when you're missing home

Only know you love her when you let her go

And you let her go

- Let Her Go, Passenger

"Lizzy, come on," Jane implored. "Be reasonable."

"Me be reasonable? Jane! I told you what he said and did!" I angrily threw another pair of socks into the suitcase that lay open on the bed. I had spent the night trying to decide whether to go home or stay at Pemberley and give Will another chance. The light of dawn had captured me in a particularly determined mood, and I'd lugged my suitcase out of the dressing room and had begun packing. Jane had arrived minutes later.

Jane grabbed my wrist as I reached for a stack of t-shirts. "Did you give him a chance to explain?"

"Yes," I paused, jerking my arm from her grasp as I swallowed back a sob, "and he didn't even care enough to try!"

She raised an eyebrow. "Has Will ever done anything to give you a reason to doubt him?"

"Not until now. It's just—" I released a frustrated huff and turned to face my sister. "Look, I understand why he doesn't want me to go out alone. Richard told me all about it the night before last, but that's not the point! If Will cares about me, he should have been the one to talk to me, not his cousin."

"Start from the beginning," Jane urged. She leveled a patient look at me and crossed her arms over her chest.

I rubbed my eyes with the heels of my hands. "Will received a threatening email the day before yesterday from a former employee, named George Wickham. In the email, he intimated that he intends to use me as leverage to hurt Will. Richard explained that Will didn't want to tell me about the situation until he'd sorted out all the details and put protective measures in place because he didn't want me to feel afraid. And honestly, after some serious thought on my part, I understood.

"When I came back from Lambton yesterday, I went to Will's study with the express intention of speaking to him about it, but all he did was yell at me." I dropped my voice for effect and imitated Will's command, "He said, 'I won't compromise on this, Elizabeth! You will obey me!'"

Jane's eyebrows rose nearly to her hairline, and her mouth formed a circle. She bit her lip and slowly shook her head. "Wow. While I can understand why you're upset, I also know that you're intelligent enough to understand Will's decision as well. Knowing you, you would have done the same thing if you were in his shoes." She tilted her head to the side, her expression contemplative. "Well, maybe not the demanding obedience part, but you wouldn't have told anyone about the danger at hand, either, until you'd made sure that you knew the facts and had handled the situation."

Jane's words echoed my earlier, less angry thoughts during my walk back from the village. "I fully realize that. Good Lord, this is a mess, isn't it?" I squeezed my eyes shut, dropped my head into my hands, and massaged my temples.

She shrugged. "Well, to be fair, he could have handled the situation with a little more finesse, too."

I sank down on the bed between my sister and my suitcase and wiped the tears that had begun to fall against my will from my cheeks. "You wouldn't believe what I said to him after he told me that."

Jane gave a short laugh. "I can imagine." She shook her head and brushed my hair away from my face. "Will you stay?"

I rubbed a hand over my tired eyes. "I don't know. We'll see how things go. I won't be ordered around, nor will I put up with his temper. He needs to understand that."

Jane nodded in understanding.

A knock sounded from the sitting-room door.

Jane smiled reassuringly. "Five bucks says that's him." She rose and made her way to the hallway door. "Come find Charles and me when you're done talking to him, okay?"

I nodded and stood, taking a deep breath and squaring my shoulders as I did so. After the door closed behind my sister, I quickly wiped my eyes again, determined not to let Will see me cry and turned to face the sitting-room door. "Come in."

The door opened slowly, and Will stepped into the room. He halted abruptly when he spotted my suitcase and blinked several times. "What are you doing?" he asked, lifting his eyes from the suitcase to search mine.

I took a deep breath and lifted my chin. "What does it look like?"

He shrugged, his mouth settling into a grim line. "So, that's it, then? You're going to run at the first sign of trouble without even trying to work things out?" he calmly asked as he moved from the doorway and walked around the bed to stand in front of me. His face remained carefully blank as he placed a warm hand on my shoulder.

Run at the first sign of trouble without trying to work things out? Was he serious?The. Gall. My spine stiffened and I stood straighter. I struggled to take slow, deep breaths while I reined in my temper.

"Relationships take work, Elizabeth," he said, bringing his other hand to rest on my opposite shoulder.

The anger boiling inside me was momentarily usurped by a sudden swell of uneasiness as his hand closed on my shoulder. Even though my rational mind knew Will wouldn't harm me, his bout of rage the day before had left me deeply unsettled. I attempted to twist free of his grasp, but his hands only tightened on my arms, refusing to let me go. Panic began to rise in my chest, and I struggled all the more.

"Elizabeth!" he pleaded, his controlled expression vanishing. He abruptly released my arms and raised his hands in front of his chest in a calming gesture. "Please, calm down! Don't walk away! Let's talk this through. Give me a chance to make things right."

I stopped struggling and took a deep, trembling breath and closed my eyes, trying to hold back the flood of fear, anger, and pain that threatened to break loose.

"Talk to me, Elizabeth!" Will commanded in a worried voice.

I lost my battle for composure and all of the emotions I had been trying so hard to hide from him flooded over. My throat closed up and tears welled up in my eyes. "I tried to talk to you yesterday! I came into your study with the express purpose of talking to you, Will! I was worried about you because I could tell there was something seriously wrong, even at supper the night before! And all you did was shout at me and demand my obedience, scaring the hell out of me in the process!" I shook my head. "I can't believe you actually have the nerve to ask me if I'm going to run at the first sign of trouble, let alone tell me that relationships take work." My eyes narrowed and I glared at him. "Are you listening to yourself? What am I supposed to think?"

The muscles in Will's jaw jumped. "I can't give you a good enough answer for that," he said, his voice hoarse. "All I can do is tell you that I'm sorry, and I am. Honestly, Elizabeth, I am!"

"Sometimes saying you're sorry isn't good enough. It takes action," I choked out.

"Then tell me what action I'm supposed to take!" he demanded, in an exasperated tone. "Because believe me when I say that I will do whatever I must to fix this."

I closed my eyes and tried to pull everything back in. My temper cooled, little by little, until the volatile emotions settled to a steady simmer in my chest.

When I opened my eyes, Will glanced at my open suitcase on the bed and his jaw clenched again. "So, are you leaving?"

I shrugged.

"I won't let you do this," he said softly.

That comment fueled my ebbing fury, bringing it to a boil once again. I took a step back, and this time he didn't try to stop me. "This is exactly what I'm talking about! You don't get to order me around! If you think that you can continue to do so, you've got another thing coming." I bit my tongue. Continuing the argument wouldn't solve anything at this point. I shook my head again as I felt my heart crumple in my chest like a ball of notebook paper. "This isn't working. I was stupid to believe it would. What was I thinking?" I whispered to myself.

Will exhaled heavily and his shoulders slumped. He lowered his head and stared at the floor for several moments. All of the tension left his body, and I saw only concern and sincerity in his eyes when he looked up again. "I'm not trying to order you around or control you or anything else, for that matter," he explained in an earnest voice. "I'm keeping the promise that I made to you. I promised you that I wouldn't let you pull away and that whenever you tried to do so, I'd pull back all the harder." He shook his head. "I should never have acted the way I did. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. For my actions, and my words. My only wish was to protect you and shield you from worry until I had the situation in hand. I didn't want to scare you."

His words found their mark. My mind raced back to the night of my fall and the promise I'd extracted from him. I remembered the fear in his voice as he'd carried me to the elevator, the vision of him with his head bowed in prayer when I awoke in the hospital, and the admission of his feelings during that last night in my apartment when he'd told me how he'd felt during the hours when he'd feared for my life. I didn't ever want to put him through anything like that again, and yet I'd done just that with my disappearance the day before.

"While I understand your reasons for not wanting me to go off on my own, I definitely wouldn't have demanded your obedience or shouted like that. I would, however, have taken similar steps to protect you, if you were the one in danger," I admitted.

Will's eyes narrowed. "You know, then, but how?" A look of comprehension passed over his face. "Richard."

I smiled wryly and nodded.

He raised his eyes to the ceiling. "Curse the man, but what would I do without him?"

"Good question," I answered. "He cares a lot about you."

Will nodded. "Will you stay?"

I took a deep breath before replying. "I don't know."

"Can you forgive me?" he asked.

I bit my lip. Despite the similarities Will and I shared, I wondered if our differences were too vast to breach. His world, after all, was not my world, and I needed time and space to think before I gave him any more answers.

He eyed me worriedly and took a step toward me. I involuntarily flinched. Something in his eyes broke and he dropped his hand to his side and then raised it again to run it over his face. "God, what have I done?" He lowered his eyes to mine again. "Elizabeth, I don't want you to be afraid of me. I would never, never harm you. Please, tell me you know that."

I swallowed hard. "I need time. I need some time by myself today to think everything through. There's a lot to process."

"I understand," he murmured. Pain filled his eyes, pricking my own heart in response. "I'll leave you then." He gave me a small, tight smile and backed away before he turned to leave, closing the sitting room door behind him.

A wave of exhaustion washed over me and I sank down on the bed and soon fell asleep. I didn't wake again until supper time.

oooOOOooo

I sat between Jane and Richard at the dinner table. Will, who had respected my wish for solitude, stared at his plate as he ate, seemingly deep in thought. Georgiana sat at his right and Caroline at his left. The latter seemed ridiculously pleased about the charged silence between Will and me and she took every opportunity to try to draw his attention away from his plate.

At one point during the meal, our eyes met, and the pain and uncertainty I saw reflected in his stabbed at my conscience. I looked back down at my plate and pushed my food around distractedly.

"How are you doing, Lizzy?" Richard asked quietly.

I shrugged a shoulder. "Meh."

"Will's been holed up in his study all day. It wasn't easy for him to stay away from you as you wished, you know."

I sighed and stared at my fork. "That's not my problem. I needed some time alone to process everything."

He leaned over to whisper, "Will you meet me on the terrace after dinner? I'd like to speak with you if that's alright."

I gave a half-hearted nod in reply.

Richard was already seated at a table on the terrace, waiting for me, when I joined him after dinner. Charles had convinced the others to join him in the rec room, leaving me free to do as I pleased.

I took a deep breath to prepare myself for the conversation ahead and sat down; sometimes, Richard's honesty and uncanny insights were downright unnerving. "What's up?"

He stared straight ahead at the silhouetted ridge behind the house. "Do you know that you and Will are two of the most stubborn people I've ever met in my life?" He shook his head and scoffed. "And between the military and my relatives, I've certainly met more than my fair share of obstinate, headstrong individuals."

I couldn't argue with that. "You're probably not wrong," I allowed.

Richard turned in his seat to face me and rested his folded arms on the tabletop. "Were the two of you able to work things out this morning?"

I shrugged. "It's complicated."

He nodded, looking down at his hands. "Do you love him?" he asked softly.

I was a bit taken aback by the directness of the question. "Yes," I answered honestly.

Richard nodded without looking up. "Then, perhaps it's not so complicated after all." He was silent for a moment before continuing, "I didn't fully realize the depth of Will's feelings for you until last night." He raised his eyes to mine. "If you share those feelings, please, consider fighting for them. I know my cousin isn't an easy man," the corner of his mouth curled in a half-smile, "but I promise you he's a good one." He rose from his seat and shoved his hands into his jean pockets. "Shall we join the others?" he asked, tipping his head towards the door.

"Sure," I agreed and followed him into the house.

"By the way, your training begins tomorrow," Richard said as we walked.

I gave him a sideways glance. "Training?"

"Self-defense training," he clarified. "I want to begin by assessing what you know and continue instruction from there."

"That sounds like fun," I smirked.

He raised an eyebrow. "We'll see if you still think it's fun after tomorrow."

We entered the rec room to find Will playing billiards by himself, and the other four occupants engaged in a game of shuffleboard. When Will's eyes met mine, he laid down his cue and walked across the room to meet me. I gave him a tentative smile as he approached, and his whole face brightened in return.

"Hey," I greeted shyly.

"Hello," Will replied, lifting his hand to cradle my cheek.

I closed my eyes but resisted the urge to lean into his palm.

"Will you come with me?" he whispered.

I mentally noted that he had asked if I would come with him, instead of demanding I follow him or taking for granted that I would. I decided to count that as a step in the right direction. "Where are we going?" I asked when we were safely in the corridor and out of earshot of the rest of the group.

He glanced at me over his shoulder and smirked. "Not certain, yet." At my puzzled look, he turned to face me. "I want to talk to you, but not with everyone else present," he explained.

The thought of being alone with him when my emotions were still so raw and volatile unnerved me.

His eyes narrowed. "Trust me, please." He held out his hand, palm up, giving me the choice to accept it or not.

I stared at his open palm for a few moments before I hesitantly placed my hand in his. His fingers closed gently around mine and he resumed walking beside me.

When Will eventually stopped in front of the ballroom, he opened one of the doors for me and then firmly closed it behind us. The orange light of the sunset shone through the wall of tall, west-facing windows, filling the room with soft, mellow light. I stopped in the middle of the floor to admire the view.

"Will you dance with me?" he asked, coming to stand in front of me.

I arched an eyebrow. "I thought you didn't dance if you could possibly help it."

He tilted his head to one side and held out his hand, palm up. "I can't help it."

I couldn't stop the laugh that escaped, but I crossed my arms over my chest instead of taking his offered hand.

He gave a frustrated huff, shaking his head as he shoved his hands into his pockets.

"What did you want to speak to me about?" I asked after a very long, silent moment.

He swallowed hard, his gaze burning into mine. "I want to apologize again for yesterday."

I took a step toward him, closing the distance between us, and pressed my fingers against his mouth to silence him.

Will kissed my fingertips before he raised his chin to dislodge my hand and gave me an amused look.

"Just do me one favor, Will."

"Anything," he whispered, settling his hands on my waist.

"Promise me that you'll talk to me next time something big like this comes up, okay? I'm more than willing to listen and to try to see things from your perspective."

He nodded and dropped his head, closing his eyes. "I promise." He exhaled heavily and his jaw tensed. I could tell that he was holding something back.

I took a step back and his hands fell to his sides. "Don't do that," I whispered.

He looked up in confusion. "Do what?"

I shook my head. "Don't hide what you feel or think from me, please. When you do, I tend to jump to the worst possible conclusions."

Will stared into my eyes for a long while, as if he were trying to come to a decision.

"Please," I repeated softly.

"You don't want me to hide anything, then?" he questioned.

I nodded.

He raised an eyebrow. "Not even when I'm angry?"

I shook my head. "Earlier today, you said relationships take work. They also take communication and lots of it."

Will smiled mischievously. "I don't think you know what you're getting yourself into."

I took a deep, calming breath to cool my growing impatience. "You asked me to trust you. You need to trust me, too. Please, tell me what's on your mind."

He hesitated for a moment. "There's no going back after this, Elizabeth. Are you sure you really want to know?"

I gave a single nod in reply. "Yes. After all, I promised you back in Omaha – after I'd had some sense knocked into me – that I wouldn't hold anything back. I think that should go both ways, don't you?"

His eyes narrowed slightly as he took a step closer and gently held my face between his palms. "Isn't it obvious?"

I gave him a questioning look.

"I love you," he softly exclaimed.

My mouth parted in surprise, and I stared wonderingly up at him. It was one thing for others to speculate about Will's feelings for me, but it was quite another thing to hear it from him. After all, it didn't make sense – to me, anyway – that he should love me. I shook my head, feeling overwhelmed. "Why? And how do you know that?" I asked, still not quite believing my ears.

His expression grew intense. "Because, Elizabeth, I do."

The questions and uncertainties tumbling over and around each other in my mind left my thoughts in a tangled mess again. I certainly hadn't gone out of my way to influence his feelings one way or the other. As for my own feelings, despite my preliminary doubts, how could I not help falling in love with him? His patient persistence had chipped away at my armor, leaving me vulnerable. "Will." I swallowed the lump in my throat, searching for the right words. "'Because I do,' really isn't a reason. I haven't done anything at all to make you love me."

Will rested his forehead against mine and wrapped his arms around my waist. "You didn't have to do anything to make me love you. And, 'because I do,' is a perfectly acceptable answer. But, since you insist on a more precise explanation, you shall have it.

"I know that I love you, Elizabeth Bennet, because I miss you when we're apart, and I know that I don't want to spend my future without you. I know because you understand me as no one else does, and when I'm with you, I feel like I don't have to hide my truest self; I feel accepted and like I'm enough without having to put on a mask. With you, I feel complete and whole." He grazed my neck and collarbone with his fingertips, sending my heart racing, and dropped his voice to a whisper, "I know that I love you because, when I touch you, my body ignites."

I pulled my head back to look at him. "That last part sounds more like lust."

He laughed. "You're so stubborn."

"And what do you want from me?" I asked.

Will placed a finger beneath my chin, gently forcing me to meet his eyes as they searched my own. "Everything," he said very clearly and slowly, enunciating each syllable. "I love you, Elizabeth."

My throat was too tight to speak as I struggled to maintain my tenuous grip on my composure.

He cradled my face between his hands once again and placed a soft kiss on my forehead. The sun had set, and the ballroom was illuminated only by the fading twilight. He took my hands in his. "Come on," he whispered, "it's late."

When we arrived at my bedroom door, he lifted my hand to kiss the inside of my wrist. "Goodnight."

"Goodnight, Will," I managed to whisper past the lump in my throat as I stepped through the door that he kindly held open for me. I turned to look at him one last time before I closed it softly behind me.

oooOOOooo

A deafening crash of thunder woke me in the middle of the night. The sound was followed by another in rapid succession and then a blinding flash of lightning, accompanied by what sounded like an explosion. I reached over to the nightstand and fumbled with the lamp. I finally located the switch and pressed it, but the light didn't turn on. The lightning strike must have hit a transformer, close to the house, from the sounds of it.

I heard Will's and Georgiana's voices in the hallway, and, concerned that something serious had happened, I grabbed my phone and switched on the built-in flashlight, and then quickly got up to follow them. By the time I stepped into the corridor, however, they had already left the family wing. When I reached the main hallway, everyone but Will was standing, grouped together at the top of the stairs, using their cell phones to illuminate the area. Georgiana squeezed my hand as I came to a stop beside her.

"Where's Will?" I asked.

"He went to check to see what happened," Georgianna answered, looking worried.

Will returned shortly. His t-shirt was damp, and water dripped from his hair. "A transformer was hit by lightning and exploded," he calmly explained. "There's no fire, but there also won't be any power for the next day, at least. In the meantime, I'll bring up some supplies. You should all have torches and extra batteries in the drawer of your bedside tables. Please use those and conserve your phone batteries. Elizabeth and Richard, come with me." With that, Will flicked on the flashlight he held, turned, and started down the staircase. Richard and I followed close behind.

It was eerie walking through the halls of the great house with only a flashlight to guide us. One never really realizes just how much noise and light pollution there is until it's gone. We arrived at a storeroom in the kitchen hallway where we retrieved bottled water, additional batteries, and LED lanterns. Will didn't say anything to me or Richard, except to issue directions about what to grab and carry. Laden with supplies, we returned to those gathered upstairs and distributed the items to everyone.

"Please, try to get some rest," Will said. "I'll put in a call to report the power outage first thing in the morning." After everyone else had returned to their rooms, he walked beside me down the hallway. When we reached my door, he took my hand in his and led me to our sitting room instead. He entered the room with me right behind him and released my hand to close the door.

After setting our lanterns, batteries, and water on the table, he turned to me. "Thank you for helping tonight."

"Happy to do so," I smiled. "Does this sort of thing happen often?"

Will shrugged. "Power outages…occasionally. Exploding transformers, not so much."

"I see," I replied with a small nod. Thunder rumbled and lightning flashed again, highlighting Will's strikingly handsome face. I shivered.

"Elizabeth," he whispered as he took a step closer, closing the gap between us. "Thank you for forgiving me. Please believe me…I just didn't want anything to happen to you. You mean far too much to me."

I tensed at the edge to his voice and bit my lip as I gave a single nod. "I understand, Will. But I really can take care of myself, you know."

He exhaled heavily. "I've no doubt in your abilities, but I do doubt the motives of others."

I pursed my lips and he laughed softly.

"What?" I demanded sharply.

His eyes narrowed a bit and his mouth curved up into a smile. "This," he answered, laying a finger gently against my lips.

The electrical sensation caused by his touch made me catch my breath.

"I love your determination, your strength of spirit, and, oddly enough, your stubbornness. Besides, you're sort of adorable when you're angry."

Frustration won out over sentiment, and I smacked him on the chest with my hand. "Way to ruin a moment!" I exclaimed quietly, trying to hide my smile.

He laughed. "I'm sorry for riling you up."

I raised a skeptical eyebrow. "No, you're not. You did that on purpose."

"Mm-hm," Will replied. "As I said, you're adorable when you're angry; much like an angry kitten. Well, most of the time, anyway. You were sort of terrifying yesterday, actually."

I rolled my eyes. "Look who's talking," I muttered.

His expression grew serious once again. "Please, stay here at Pemberley…with me."

I leveled a serious look at him. "I will if you promise not to order me around. Just talk to me, Will."

"I promise," he whispered as he bent to kiss me lightly.

It was the first time he'd kissed me in days, and the feeling of it was overwhelming. I could tell from the light pressure of his lips on mine that he'd meant it to be just a brief, reassuring gesture, but then, he pulled back and in the dim light, I saw several emotions play over his features. He traced the line of my jaw with his fingertips and bent to kiss me again, softly, lingering.

I stood on my tiptoes to meet him halfway. My pulse pounded in my throat as he thrust the fingers of the hand that still rested on my cheek through my hair, holding me to him as he deepened the kiss. His free hand slid from my hip to my waist, inadvertently raising the hem of my shirt so that his palm rested against my skin. He ran his palm along my spine and my body burned under his touch. I couldn't help the gasp of pleasure that escaped my lips when his thumb grazed my ribs, as his hand made its way back down to my waist.

Another crash of thunder, louder than any I had ever heard before, shook the windows, startling me. I instinctively jumped, unintentionally breaking contact with Will in the process.

He laughed. "Whoa, there." He kissed me lightly and pulled me to him again, this time his hands properly resting on the fabric of my shirt, instead of against my bare skin. "Are you alright?" he asked, resting his forehead against mine.

"Mm-hm," I murmured.

"Come here, love," he whispered, leading me over to the couch. He sat down and pulled me down next to him. I snuggled into his side, content just to enjoy his company and closeness. We sat together, listening to the thunder and lashing rain until the worst of the storm seemed to have passed.

After a while, I lifted my head from Will's chest to look up at him. "My grandma always said that fine china, once mended, is twice as strong. I think the same thing goes for relationships," I whispered.

Will kissed me, smiling against my lips. "And what else did your grandmother say?"

"She said don't let the sun set on your anger."

He laughed softly, the warm sound sending a tingle down my spine. "I think she must have been a very wise woman."

"She was," I agreed. "And Will?"

"Yes?"

"I love you, too."