A/N- This chapter is one of my favorites out of the teens that are written out. Updates will be going to every other week after this between and full time job and masters degree classes begin. Please review and follow to let me know that you would like to read more! -GP
Chapter 16- Wishing You Were Here
Summary: Alternate World: The Empire Prevails and the Jedi have all been in hiding for thirty years. Emperor Palptaine searches for a way to live long past his dying body through cloning technology and his attempts at descendants. One of his " experiments" escapes and comes to live a slave's life on Naboo. He will meet and forever his destiny changed by the fateful meeting with none other than one young Naberrie girl…
Location: Theed, Naboo
Month 3 Day 30 Year 28 BBY
The holo call had left Padme' feeling shaken to her core. She hadn't thought it would be so painful to see him again. Just over three months and he felt like a stranger. The familiarity had been there, but the heartbreak as well. A shiver shoots down her spine thinking about the hurt in his eyes at the mention of her being with Palo intimately. The hurt had reflected something akin to betrayal, at least that is how his look had made her feel inside.
Has he wanted more than friendship like I have for so long? The look on his face seemed to say so.
Her mind has been spinning on end for four hours- through the ride to the restaurant, through the most expensive dinner she'd ever tasted and now as Palo pulls his speeder back to the edge of the park nearby the restaurant. He had asked her to take a stroll near the pond to keep the night going. The date has gone well- at least based on Palo's expression on his face he felt that way. Padme' had felt it had been filling her with loneliness more than she's ever known. It isn't that he has done something during the date- in fact he has been more than delightful this evening. He had shown up in a white crisp suit. His hair had been gelled back, risking no curls from dropping into his eyes. His brown eyes had been shining in nervous confidence, which Padme' had sensed as well. He had roamed her own pink number with his eyes, and she had sensed his desire. The night could end with her innocence ending and a new beginning between them.
Dinner had gone well- Palo had already chosen their steaks and the fruit sauce to cover it. The conversation had been light and airy- covering up any hole between them. Padme' had chosen to follow his lead with the conversation, smiling, laughing as needed. It had felt like a play- and her role had been to play the delighted girlfriend on a very upscale date- hoping for a proposal as all her family and friends predicted. This hadn't occurred at the restaurant. She had felt jittery thinking Katrina might be right- and nothing had happened- not with her champagne- not in her dessert. Both are traditional proposal methods on Naboo. Most women would be leaping with hope all night- Padme' isn't. She's shaken with hopelessness- that her relationship with her best friend is completely gone and it feels like a knife has torn her own heart open.
Her eyes plant themselves on the spring evening. The weather in Theed has begun to warm up. The buds of the spring blossoms are preparing for the blooming season which could be any day now. Spring Fete is just a week away- a respite before classes resume until the Summer.
Summer- I wonder if Anakin will return to Naboo on his leave time.
" You've been quiet tonight," Palo comments.
Padme's gaze flickers over to him. His eyes do not reflect in concern, more of adoration. She senses his nerves returning. She shrugs and mumbles, " I've had a lot on my mind with the break in term coming."
He nods and he replies, " Yes, it has sprung upon us. I feel that it was yesterday that I met you studying in the library last fall."
Padme' gives him a small smile. She returns her gaze up ahead. Up ahead she can detect a circular pavilion with soft light appearing on the shadows of the path. Palo grabs her hand and leads her towards the pavilion. As their steps go in a faster stride than she would like, her heart thuds against her chest.
Oh force- this is it...
When they reach the pavilion, she stares in awe. The entire white pavilion is covered in the soft light of the candles above. There are red roses around the entire floor of the pavilion. Padme's mouth is agape as they step up onto the pavilion and Palo turns to face her. He clasps her hands into his. His brown orbs shine with the confidence he's had all night- and a touch of the nerves as well.
She licks her lips as her thoughts start to race. Oh gods-
Palo takes a knee and begins, " Padme' Naberrie, since I've met you I've been enchanted by you. I know we are both young and have careers ahead of us, but I love you and I know you are the woman I can envision a future with."
He pauses and opens a small white box that matches his suit. Inside is a beautiful red jeweled ring. The sparkling of the ruby reflects against the light within the pavilion.
Oh Force- he has my grandmother's wedding ring.
He continues, " Will you do me the honor of marrying me?"
Padme's heart clenches in her chest. Her mouth is agape and throat is dry. She doesn't even know what to say. What are the right words to use in this matter? He is everything any woman can hope for- charming, handsome, and kind. He has a huge career ahead of him. He is chivalrous every time they are together. He can have a touch of arrogance on occasion, but her father had to approve of their match if he willingly gave him his mother's ring. Padme' had known Sola hadn't wanted the ring and her father had saved it either for her or Sabe. He had told both of them when a romantic partner of theirs impresses him enough to be his son in law then he will willingly give them the ring to propose to one of his younger daughters.
Padme' licks her lips as Palo's heart hammers in his own chest. He gets up from his bent knee and takes her hands. " Oh my darling, you're in shock. I thought you might have noticed the specialty of the night."
Padme' leads him to the nearby bench. She feels a bit faint and dizzy. Her mind is spinning with so many thoughts and emotions. He cups her cheek and says softly, " Oh my I've left you speechless."
She finds her voice. " I didn't expect you to propose so early into our relationship."
His smile returns and he chuckles. " Darling Padme', I want to be your husband and best friend for the rest of our lives."
You already have a best friend. Her mind whispers to her.
Anakin
She touches his hand on her cheek and murmurs, " I- don't know what to say, Palo."
Palo smiles with ease and confidence. He begins, " Before you give me an answer, I should explain our situation to you. I didn't want to mention this on your birthday- but I have some exciting news."
Padme listens as he continues excitedly, " I have found a patron. His name is Raymus Celechu. He is a member of the royal house of Alderann and he is in love with my work. He has offered to sponsor my own traveling gallery, starting with an opening show on Alderann. The gallery will travel across the galaxy and I want you there by my side."
Padme' blinks upon hearing his plans. Traveling gallery? He has an apprenticeship to finish here on Naboo. She says softly, " What of your apprenticeship? When do you leave?"
Palo shrugs and comments, " The apprenticeship will go to someone else. My contract is for the next five years. We will leave at the start of the summer."
We? I haven't even said yes!
Padme' tries to swallow a bit of the fury down. What he's offering is a grand life- a rich life. Having a sponsorship such as what he has been offered will be wonderful for his career, but what of her career? What of her dreams? Did she even want to be a Senator anymore? She had thought of putting off her dreams because she desired to be as far away from Anakin as humanly possible. If she says yes, she definitely would be far away from him, but should she sacrifice any of her dreams to be away from the one person in her life that has understood all of her? Cared about her?
No, you shouldn't. Anakin will respect your decision to be near him if he's on planet. Your dreams shouldn't be deterred by anyone.
" I've applied to internships on Naboo and on Coruscant." She says plainly.
Palo smiles at her and comments, " I'm sure you could delay your internship for a year. My contract may be for five years, but I think after our wedding, we could be apart for a time. I could make trips back here to Naboo or Coruscant."
After our wedding? Is he that confident?
She says with a bit of a simmering tone. " I cannot put an offer off if it is on Coruscant. Those positions don't open often and I won't know for a few weeks if I have been accepted, Palo."
Palo makes a dismissive gesture with his hand. He says nonchalantly, " I'm sure Bail will take you on as his intern. You don't have to worry, my love."
She comments coolly, " I told Bail that I want to apply like everyone else to his intern position. I don't want to take advantage of our family connections."
Palo laughs at her response as if it is nothing. Does he not comprehend that she stands by her morals? Most people he knows don't, especially politicians. He suggests, " Darling you wouldn't be the first to use their family connections, how do you think so many politicians started their careers? They used their families' connections and money. You would be doing nothing wrong."
His dismissive gesture of her morals fuels her anger. She tries to keep it at bay- this should be a wonderful occasion. A man has proposed to her for the first time- with her father's blessing. And here she is - furious with him.
" Maybe you don't know me as well as I thought." She comments coolly- the romantic aura dissipating.
His expression does not change, nor his attitude. He says gently, " I don't mean to offend your manners, my darling. Your morals are valid, but even the most generous people have to cross their morals at times for the betterment of their lives and others. There is something else we need to discuss prior to your answer as well."
She pushes his hand away from her face and leaves space between them. She hesitates, keeping her distance as he continues his stipulations to their engagement. " I know you will agree with this wholeheartedly. I wish you to end all contact with Anakin. I fully am aware you have not seen or heard from him since that disaster at the wedding. I am not comfortable with my future wife associating with a man like him."
Padme' blood runs cold. Now he's asking her to end a friendship of almost eight years? Haven't you already done that? You told Anakin you couldn't be friends with someone who hurts innocent people. Her mind whispers all of these thoughts to her. Is she done? The way he had looked at her tonight replays in her mind. Those blue eyes hurt- betrayal etched in those oceans. He had been hurt knowing she might choose to sleep with Palo- he had been jealous of this fact.
Her heart thumps painfully against her chest. If she were to choose to marry Palo, he meant no longer hearing the laughter of her best friend, no longer knowing how his day has gone. She missed knowing what he's thinking, sensing his emotions through their bond.
" I know what he did was unforgivable-" She begins, but Palo's anger is evident.
" He's dangerous! His force powers are those of an Inquisitor! I don't want you to associate with a man who could hurt you."
Padme's anger rises. She retorts, standing. " Anakin is a part of my family. My father and sisters think of him as family. I can't just ask them to not associate with him either! Anakin has never harmed any of us. He's never hurt me!"
She stops dead in her tracks when the words come out of her mouth. He's never hurt me. He never would. Her heart softens knowing this. She had chosen to cease contact with a man who made her laugh, made her smile- knows her secrets over her new boyfriend whom she's realizing doesn't get her- doesn't see her fears, doesn't see her for herself.
She shakes her head, needing air- even on the outside. She needed to get away- she needed to see Anakin. She needs to see if their friendship is worth fixing, before she gives Palo an answer.
" I- can't give you an answer to your proposal. I- need time because it's obvious that right now, we're on different paths." She says her tone dead set.
She's angry and he can tell by her hardened expression. He had thought this would be so easy! She would be his by the end of the night and they would be celebrating their engagement in his bedroom where she belonged, under his body, naked- moaning his name. Not arguing over a man who had tried to choke him over touching his girlfriend. A man who clearly was jealous of their relationship and only wanted her for himself. Something that Palo wished to remain a secret from Padme' if he could help it. He had known based on Anakin's actions that he was in love with her too.
He tries to calm her. " Darling, I don't wish to argue with you. Of course take all the time you need."
Yes, give her a few days to come to her senses. She'd come back to him, fresh and come to her senses that a man like Anakin Skywalker is someone who is dangerous and not to be associated with.
Padme' shakes her head and steps away from her boyfriend. " No, I'll walk home. I need to think."
He shakes his head, trying to guide her back on the path to the speeder. She pulls away and retorts, " I can get home myself- please give me some space."
He stops short of arguing for her safety, but her heels click in the other direction. He watches her stomp off in the other direction with his heart breaking all at once.
Padme's pink pale heels keep clicking against the ground under her. Her angry strides have led her for at least several kilometers off into the park. Her anger is clear- and her heart aches. Tears are brimming into her eyes as she's tried to keep them at bay for a good while now. How long had she been walking? Perhaps forty minutes? An hour? Her eyes fall onto her chrono watch- 11:40 pm. They had arrived at the park around 11, so she hadn't been walking too long. She knows where she is as she glances around. This is the park where her father had taken her every birthday.
She had loved seeing the beautiful blooms of the Lotus flowers- her namesake. She notices the Lotus flowers growing near a large tree in front of her. She reaches for the tree and places herself on the damp ground and reaches for the flowers. Her hands shake and her body begins to shake with visible shudders. Tears threaten to creep down her cheeks.
She feels alone- abandoned by her boyfriend who doesn't really know her. She feels the loneliness creep into her bones. Her heart breaking, knowing the one person she would talk to about this isn't the person she can go to anymore. Her instincts and head tell her not to do it, but her heart needs him. She reaches for her comm. link and from memory dials the number of the one person she needs right now.
" Hello?" The deep sleepy baritone answers gruffly. The tone is that of half-asleep, half annoyed as it is the middle of the night on Coruscant.
Her voice cracks as she whispers, " Ani-" Her voice is weak, waiting for the dam to break- trying to hold back that dam.
The deep baritone's tone changes immediately to one that is more awake. " Pad? Are you okay- it's the middle of the night."
The sound of her name on his lips is all she needs to hear. The dam breaks and her body shudders with her sobs. He had asked her if she's okay. He hadn't been concerned about his sleep. Her sobs are loud and he can't understand her words as she tries to explain, " I'm so-rry- I nee-d to talk to you. I -need-" Hiccup- " He-ar your voice."
Anakin's heart melts hearing her sobs coming from the other line. He can hear the pain in her voice- the heartbreak. His tone changes to one of concern. " Padme', what's going on? Did something happen between you and Palo?"
She nods, even though he cannot see her through the comm. link. She sobs harder and waits until she takes a deep breath. " P- whenever you are ready, I'm here."
She sobs harder, tears ruining her makeup. Dammit Anakin! You're still there for me even when I haven't been there for you.
After a few minutes, she takes a breath and tries to get out. " I wish- you were he-re."
His heart breaks hearing those words. Even though she had seemed visibly upset with him earlier- she still had called him when she is in pain. He aches to be able to wrap his arms around her- stop making her heart from hurting from whatever that bastard had done to her.
" Me too P- tell me what I can do?" He whispers into his comm, as he plops down on Obi-wan's sofa. He hadn't felt like going back to the Academy after getting off his shift.
He leans back against the back of the black sofa, listening to her sobs. He feels helpless listening to her pain. He cannot even send waves of calm through the force- technique Obi-wan had taught him recently. He waits for a few more moments- listens to her trying to calm herself down. What had they fought about?
Padme' leans back against the tree, her pink dress wet from her tears. She closes her eyes imagining her best friend's face and the concern probably written all over it. She takes a deep breath and says weakly, " Pa-lo ask-ed me to mar-ry him."
Anakin's voice is etched in confusion and concern. " If he proposed, why are you so upset?"
Padme' sniffs back the snot in her nose and says, " I'm– am angry with him."
Anakin tries to hold back his chuckle. She's angry about him proposing? How much has she drunk tonight? Most women would be jumping for joy at this prospect and here she is- furious about it.
" I'm not angry that he proposed. He doesn't understand me. He practically has planned out the next five years for us!" Her anger has returned and is evident through her tears.
" How so?"
She rips at one of the Lotus' on the grass, throwing the stem and petals away from her. " He accepted a job as a traveling artist. The contract is for the next five years and he wants me to go with him."
He had thought she was falling in love with the artist- as much as that hurt. He had proposed a life for them both- one of luxury- something not too many artists could offer their significant other.
" P- his offer sounds like a dream, not a nightmare." He offers gently.
She rips at another Lotus flower, then another. She grunts and then retorts, " Yeah- until he mentioned delaying my internship for a year."
" I thought you weren't sure of wanting to be a Senator." He comments, thinking of their conversation earlier in the day.
" Yes- but he assumes I would delay it and then take the position working for Bail, since we're family." She seethes through her anger and tears.
Anakin bobs his head. He had assumed she'd say yes, and put off her internship for him. He had assumed his best friend would be like any other woman he had probably courted and put his career ahead of her own.
" Did you tell him your feelings on the matter?"
" Yes! And he dismissed them! How dare he! I have dreams too- ones that don't align with his own. I thought he knew me better than this!" She admits and then fires back, " And this isn't all he's asked of me!"
" What else does he want from you?" Anakin says gently, awaiting her reply.
Her voice becomes quiet, a sudden change from the anger spilling from her lips. Tears leak from her eyes as she isn't sure if she wants to admit to him what her boyfriend has asked of her.
" P?"
The silence deadens on the other line as he does not hear anything but her breathing. What could he have possibly asked of her? It had to be something terrible for her to cry this hard. Padme' didn't cry often- not like this. He had witnessed it a few times in their friendship.
"P, I can't help you figure out the best solution if you're not forthright with me." He deadpans.
She takes a deep breath and releases the information asked of her. The words spill like vile from her mouth, poison. " He doe-sn't want me to have any mo-re con-tact with yo-u."
Anakin's jaw clenches and his anger seeps through his own voice. " Why?"
She spits out those words with disgust. " Why? Anakin, you choked him, why wouldn't he fear for my safety."
Anakin sighs and runs his hands through his hair. She's correct, if he were in Palo's place he'd request the same if he felt Palo were dangerous.
" I'm sorry- it's my fault we're in this situation, if I hadn't have-"
She cuts him off. " I need to see you."
" P- your on Naboo-" He begins.
She cuts him off again. " Anakin, I know you have a full schedule with training. I'm just asking for a bit of time. All I've thought about tonight is how I'm not ready to say goodbye to you."
He swallows and murmurs, " What about your classes?"
She shakes her head. " I don't care. The spaceport isn't too far of a walk. I know the flight is a few days, but I need to get away. Please don't say anything to Sabs or Dorme' until after I've left, okay?"
He sighs, eyeing the clock. The flight from Naboo took several days. She didn't even have a bag packed. She wanted to leave now. Should he tell her to go home and think about it in the morning? That would be the most logical advice, but his heart screams at him to not think logically and give their friendship a chance.
" Okay- please contact me once you're on your way. You should go home and pack a bag." He suggests.
She says her head. " No, I don't want anyone knowing before I leave. Katrina will start asking questions that I don't want to answer. I just need to see you, okay? I'll borrow some of Sabs clothes when I get there. I'm sure the ship has extra clothes on board anyway. I should go. Thanks for answering my call. I miss you."
He swallows hard, hearing those sweet words out of her mouth. " I miss you too, P."
The comm. link line goes dead. He sighs and leans back against the sofa. He rubs his face with his thoughts reeling. The excitement of seeing her after all this time makes his heart thump. He's too energized to sleep. He turns on the holo and finds a podrace going on and his thoughts drift to the racers- trying to get his mind to stop racing. He hasn't felt this happy in a long time with this thought he switches his mind back to the racers and knows he just has to wait. Waiting a few more days to be reunited with the woman he loves- it gives him hope for the future he might be able to share with her.
To Be Continued