Bella

I woke up at the desk in the study.

I called Ben's office and arranged to pick up the travel papers for Anthony. I smoothed my dress and decided I should sneak into my room and change before Edward woke up and tried to stop me.

I wasn't prepared for the sight I found when I entered my room. Edward was asleep with both kids snuggled up to him. I realized that moving Anthony away from him would probably wake him.

I quickly changed my clothes, my hair still up. I didn't take the time to comb it out. The cab would be here soon.

I glanced over at the little suitcase I had packed for Anthony. I realized he was going to need a change of clothes and a fresh diaper before we left.

I looked over at Elizabeth and then slipped out to fetch a change of clothes for her as well, trying to fight the ache that was creeping up with force.

I woke my daughter first, quickly dressed her and told her to go wait by the front door.

I laid out the things for Anthony before I even attempted to take him from his father's arms. Edward groaned a little in response and once he was free, I moved the baby to the other side of the bed and quickly started dressing him.

Edward woke with a start grabbing the side of the bed. "The baby!" He looked around frantically for a moment and then found me snapping the last couple of snaps on his outfit.

"Bella!" He lunged for me but I put my hand up. "I'm sorry, whatever it is, I'm sorry."

I shook my head at him with teary eyes and settled the baby on my shoulder. I wanted to say something, anything, but my chest ached.

I couldn't breathe, words would not come, just tears and I fought those back.

I headed for the door.

I paused to pick up the little suitcase, Edward sprang across the room. He slammed into the door stopping me from opening it and then yanked the bag from my hand.

He flung it open and baby things flew around the room.

"NO! NO! YOU'RE NOT DOING THIS!"

The baby started crying.

I looked away.

"NO, BELLA, YOU'RE NOT LEAVING ME AGAIN!"

His controlling tone brought out my rebellious side and I decided that I would just buy Anthony new things in the states.

I reached for the door and he slammed against it again. "GOD, BELLA, WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG? YOU CAN'T TAKE THEM FROM ME! PLEASE DON'T TAKE THEM!"

My sad eyes met his. I knew he loved the children and they loved him. Elizabeth would be crushed.

"Damn it, Bella, talk to me! What's going on in that head of yours? Why are you doing this again?"

I bounced the baby nervously trying to calm him but he wouldn't stop crying.

There was a knock at the door and Edward answered it.

One of the nannies spoke to me around Edward. "Mum, would you like me to take the baby while you have your discussion?" I stepped forward but Edward kept his arm up blocking the door. I handed the baby to her over his arm, glaring at him.

"Thank you, would you mind getting him settled and waiting for me by the front door? Elizabeth is already down there."

"NO!" Edward snapped and then yelled at the nanny, "You will settle him and then put him to bed, then take Elizabeth to breakfast and then to the music room."

The nanny's eyes darted back and forth between the two of us, and then Edward emphasized, "You work for me!" and then slammed the door.

I lunged for it but was trapped in the room with Edward now. "If you insist on leaving me, so be it, but you will not take my children."

I slapped him and he pinned me against the wall.

He was furious and hurt all it once. "Stop it, Bella!" The length of his body pressed against mine holding me to the wall.

"Why are you running from me again?" He looked down at me, his eyes burning.

I just shook my head at him and struggled to get away but he held fast, I couldn't budge.

"Damn it, Bella, TELL ME!"

I just glared at him as he held me in place. Once he realized I wasn't talking, he finally released me to go. "I don't want you to leave; the kids won't understand why you left," he said.

"I don't belong here, Edward. It's time I gathered up what's left of my life and get the hell out of here before I completely lose myself again."

He turned around and looked at me shocked. "Bella, no," he whispered.

He finally realized I was leaving and that he couldn't hold me here.

"I'll have my lawyer contact Mr. Cheney about the custody issue." I grabbed the door knob and was opening it.

"NO!" he shouted.

My head whipped around in surprise.

"Please, Love, don't," he begged.

My heart ached when my eyes met his broken face.

"Please, don't do this. Please, God, Bella, I'll give you anything, do anything, just please, please don't leave me," he sobbed.

I took in a deep breath, steeling my resolve. "I'm sorry, Edward. I hope you find yourself a better match."

I went to step into the hall but was suddenly yanked back and slammed against the wall again. "NO! There is no better match for me than you are. I need you, Bella! Love, please."

My hand touched his cheek and I shook my head. "You shouldn't have to defend your choice and I deserve to be with someone that doesn't need to defend me."

Panic flashed across his face.

He knew I was right, he had defended me left and right to everyone in his world since we'd been together and it wasn't fair, I shouldn't need to be defended.

I didn't think he ever realized until now how much it bothered me. "Please, Love, we'll leave this place, we can go anywhere you want, just don't leave me."

"What would you do if I didn't have any money, Edward?"

He looked at me, confused by my question.

"What would you have said to them, Edward, when you defended me? You always use my money and success as my defense, but what if I was broke? What if I didn't have a penny to my name? What would you say to them?"

"Fuck off," he answered without hesitation.

I rolled my eyes and shook my head. "I don't fit here, Edward. I wasn't born into this life. I'm not a Cullen."

"You can be."

I covered his mouth stopping him. "NO! Edward, I'm not, nor will I ever be. Marriage won't change who I am. I don't fit in with the circle of people you run in. I don't fit in your life. I'm tired of trying, of pretending, of fighting to prove myself to a bunch of fake pompous jerks who will hate me no matter what. I can't do it anymore. I have to go home. I need to go home." The last bit I said pleading through tears. "Please, just let me go home. I don't want to be here anymore."

He pulled me tightly against his chest as I cried; he kissed the top of my head.

He carried me to the bed and curled up with me. "We'll go home; we'll all go home together. I'm sorry, Love, I'm sorry I didn't get you out of here sooner. I promise; we'll leave today if you insist, but we're leaving together."

My sad eyes looked up at him. I wanted to fight with him, yell at him for being so dense and not realizing that he was just as bad as the rest.

It was only my money and success that made me acceptable to him, nothing else, and I couldn't stay with him for that reason.

I was so tired, though. I hadn't slept well and I was exhausted.

Before I realized what was happening, my eyes drifted closed and I fell asleep with Edward clinging to me for dear life.

I awoke a few hours later from another bad dream. Edward had finally fallen asleep, so I carefully peeled his arms from around me and slipped out. I made the calls I needed to and then stepped out into the taxi that I had summoned. I cried all the way to the airport.

I stared silently out the window and cried as the clouds drifted past the plane.

I fingered the key Jasper had given me to his home. I loved Edward but he was stuck in a world I didn't belong in.

My chest ached as I left my babies and my heart behind.

I was so tired of fighting everyone.

I didn't want to fight anymore.

It was cold and gray when the plane landed in New York, perfectly fitting my state of mind. I hailed a cab and gave the driver the address, crying the whole hour long ride.

I finally made it to the estate and dragged myself upstairs, collapsing on the large guest bed in Jasper's home.

A servant brought me a cup of tea and I sipped it silently. I took a sleeping pill and cried myself to sleep.

I didn't want to face my decisions right now.

I didn't particularly want to even live right now.

(Disclaimer from Original Author)A/N: If you hate Bella now, just wait until the next chapter. She'll really piss you off.