Thank you Charisma, Golden Flame, WinterElric, and Jess for the comments. They are very much appreciated. Now onto the story!

Chapter 4

Winry came home with the groceries in hand. She was going to make dinner that night. The boys had been working so hard. Al was deep into medical school while Ed was teaching at the University. She unlocked the door and set the groceries on the counter in the kitchen. Then, she heard swearing in the bathroom.

"Edward?" she called recognizing the obscene profanity as being his.

She heard him yelp and knocked on the bathroom door.

"Ed, are you okay?"

No response.

"Okay, I'm coming in."

Winry called his name again hoping for a response. When she received none, she opened the door, and saw Edward on the bathroom floor sitting against the wall. His white shirt off and pressed against his left arm. Blood in the sink and blood on the floor. There was more red liquid on the shirt.

Her eyes enlarged and she became terrified. "Ed, what happened?"

Edward looked horrified. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to. It just…." He trailed off looking pale.

Winry took off her stockings and tied around the shirt to make it tight but not too tight. She wanted to give enough compression to help stop the bleeding but not enough to cut off the entire blood supply to his arm. She didn't want him losing another appendage. Not without automail to substitute.

Edward was breathing rapidly. Panic had taken hold of him. Winry looked into his golden eyes. "Ed, you need to calm down. It's going to be okay. We're going to take care of it."

Edward looked down and let out a cry "Winry, please don't leave me!"

Winry's heart broke at seeing this man break down and crumble in front of her. She placed a hand on his shoulder and spoke warmly "I'm not leaving you. Trust me."

She placed her other hand on his face and gently guided him to look at her. And when their eyes met, she told him "I'm not leaving. I promise."

Edward used his automail arm to bring her closer and she rested her chin on his shoulder as they sat on the cold bathroom floor. She began to rub his back with one arm and softly touched his neck with her other hand. She hoped that this would help calm him, and she felt him start to relax some. His shuddering slowed and eventually came to a halt.

Winry waited a few minutes. She tried to keep Edward awake by talking with him. She pulled away so she could face him "Ed, what happened?"

He looked away from her in shame. He lowered his head and a shadow from his hair obscured his face.

"Ed, did you do this to yourself?" she asked, afraid that she already knew the answer.

Edward nodded. He was still afraid to verbally admit that he had a problem. If he actually spoke of it, then it would be real and he couldn't pretend to ignore it anymore.

"Why?" Winry had to ask. She waited patiently for an answer. She could still hear him breathing, and his palor was turning into more color as he was coming back from his state of shock.

"I don't know. It's the only thing that can stop it." He answered though it only made Winry have more questions.

"Stop what?" she asked him. She rubbed his back trying to console him.

"I get this feeling in my chest like something is pressing so hard on it. And then it's difficult to breathe. And this helps stop that feeling."

Winry thought about this. She had soldiers as clients before, and a few had been open about their darkest moments with her. She had gained their trust slowly with routine maintenance appointments and fix ups.

"Was it a panic attack?" she asked quietly.

Edward sighed. He didn't want to admit it but once she said it, he realized that it was true. "Maybe. I guess. I didn't know that they felt like that."

"Yeah, they do. I've been told by a few of my clients that's how they feel when it happens," Winry informed him.
Edward pondered. Maybe he did have panic attacks. It was still difficult to accept. He always thought he had more control over himself than that. Panic attacks seemed more like a sign of weakness.

Winry saw that the red stain on his shirt wasn't growing anymore so Edward's vein must have clotted by now. She removed her stocking and slowly took off the red stained shirt.

Winry was relieved. "It looks like it stopped bleeding. But it probably needs stitches. Do you have a first aid kit?"
"Yeah, in the kitchen below the sink. It's a white tin box," Edward breathed out. He didn't want to look at his arm.

Winry went to the kitchen and retrieved the box. She set it on the dining table. She went back to Edward and helped him up by his automail arm. She led him to a seat in the kitchen and had him hold out his arm. She got out the disinfectant from the kit but realized there wasn't any pain meds in the first aid kit. She went to the cabinet and pulled out a bottle of cognac.

Edward saw this. "You know we have disinfectant."

"I know. This is for pain management. Here, drink up." She poured him a glass and put a few ice cubes in it. He drank and found comfort in the burn down his throat.

Then Winry poured the disinfectant on the wound, and he screamed.
"SON OF A BITCH!" He tightened his automail hand.

"I know. There hasn't been much time for the liquor you consumed to help numb it. But we need to get this cleaned and stitched up. The sooner we get it done, the less likely an infection will occur," Winry said with determination. She was putting on her professional face now like the one she used when she was working on her clients.

Edward nodded understanding why she couldn't delay the process. He took another drink of cognac, and she began the stitching process as she's done for her clients before. It was almost soothing to her the way she pushed the needle and pulled the thread through the holes in the skin that she created. She would pull the thread and let Edward take a drink. At least he didn't bitch about the pain like her other clients had. He was tough. His life had made him that way. But even tough men could have weak moments.

Winry looked at the rest of the skin on his arm from where he had scratched it so often. It was red, dry, and flaky from his scratching that had irritated with it. She wanted to help him get better so she made a note to put lotion on his skin later but not over the incision. She finished stitching him, and then she bandaged him up wrapping it with ease. Making sure it was snug but not too tight to cut off circulation. Winry then guided the tipsy Edward to the couch so that he and her could be more comfortable.

"Edward, what brings these episodes on? Did something happen recently?" she asked as they sat down next to each other.

Edward took the last sip of his drink. He tapped the empty glass and she gladly poured him another if it meant some answers, and it if helped him control his pain.

He spoke after he took another swig. "Mrs. Baxter confronted me about you living here. She said she would call the police if you continued being a prostitute." Winry tilted her head knowing some of the story of his ex-girlfriend.

Edward continued "I'm just afraid that you'll leave me because she calls you that. It happened to a girl I knew."

"To Noah, right?"

Edward's face shot up to meet her sympathetic eyes. He was almost angry but calmed down when he saw her face. "Yes. How do you know?"

"Al told me. She was your girlfriend. And Mrs. Baxter even called the damn police on her. That's so despicable," Winry said in disgust.

"Well, me and her were actually, you know, together," Edward said with his eyes darting away from her.

"You were having sex." Winry stated nonchalantly.

"How are you so casual about it?!" Edward said frustrated.

"That's what couples do. It's not that big of a deal. You loved each other, right?" she asked.

"We did," Edward confirmed. He tilted his head back reminiscing.

He started his story. "I met Noah and another version of Alphonse after I had been here a while."

He noticed her confusion. "I'll explain the other version in a little bit. But I met Noah in Germany. She was in a bad situation, and she had to move in with us. It didn't look good to live together there either, but we had some help. The whole time I was there, it felt like I was in a dream and couldn't wake up. I didn't want to get close to anyone and when I met her, it started to seem more real. Then I went through the gate, and I had to return here to close it. I wanted to stay in Amestris so badly. But the people on this side that had opened it wanted to destroy Amestris because they were afraid of it. And I couldn't let them hurt anyone else."

Edward took another drink hoping to soothe his heart that was being unraveled. "After our Alphonse and I returned, this world wasn't a dream anymore. It was our reality. And Noah helped it feel more like home. We started our relationship shortly after I returned. Noah is part of a different race of people, and these people were highly criticized in Germany. So, we traveled around when I was on summer break from university. I even got to study abroad in Italy. But I landed an internship here in London, and they decided to hire me. It's so hard in this era to have a good job when you don't exactly have the best connections. It seemed perfect. We were out of Germany, Alphonse could get into medical school, and I earned a living that could support us. But there was one problem. Noah didn't like it here. Too much rain. The winters were colder. And then Mrs. Baxter made it worse."

Winry kept listening. Ed was finally explaining. He was finally open with her, and she was grateful because she had been afraid to bring up his ex-girlfriend. She wished she had been braver and maybe they could have avoided this incident.

"I figured we could move once the lease was up. And I proposed to her but she turned me down," Edward sighed.

Winry gasped. "Did she say why?"

"She doesn't want to have children, and she knew that at some point, I do want that. I was willing to give that up for her though," Edward finished his drink.

"So, you two had different goals, right?" Winry asked to confirm.

Edward nodded solemnly. "Yeah, you could say that."

"There's nothing wrong with having hopes and dreams for the future. But sometimes, it just needs to be with someone else. I know it hurts that you two broke up but you need to move on. There's plenty of ladies out there that would love to be with you," Winry said trying to comfort him.

"Oh yeah? Even with a metal arm and leg? It's not exactly a turn on for most women," Edward sighed.

"Ed, there's nothing wrong with those limbs. If a woman can't see how amazing you are, then she doesn't deserve you."

Edward nodded and realized something. He had just complained about his limbs that she made for him. With her own blood, sweat, and tears, she made these so he could have a chance to walk again and to have an arm that could hold someone close. He felt like an ass.

"Winry, I'm sorry for complaining. These limbs are incredible. Without them, I would be lost. I have a great job and can function just as well as any other human being here. And I don't think I've ever said thank you even once," Edward confessed to her.

Edward looks at her. "Thank you for the best automail."

Winry blushed at his forwardness. "Oh Ed, it's fine-"

Edward raised his voice "It's not fine! I never appreciated you for everything you did for me."

Edward fell into her and held her tightly. She was wondering if maybe he had too much to drink but she was also touched. Maybe some of his walls had broken down.

"Winry, you were always on my mind. For years, I've dreamed of you. And when we found each other last time, I didn't want to leave you," Edward confessed. He continued holding her, afraid to look at her. He didn't want her to see the tears streaming down his face.

However, Winry heard his tears through his voice and felt the moisture that had come from his eyes land on her dress. She couldn't help it. She began to weep, and she held him so tight that they couldn't be any closer.

Edward felt his shoulder become damp with her tears. And he heard her begin to sob. Their shoulders shook together. All of their stress and anxiety was being released to each other.

Eventually they settled down, and Edward backed away. He rubbed his eyes with his hands. "Sorry," he apologized.

"Don't be. I think we both needed that," Winry confessed. She felt so much better. Walls had been broken. Their wounds were beginning to heal.

Winry became focused and needed to get Edward straightened out "So, we need to figure out ways for you to deal with this. Obviously, hurting your arm is not the way to deal with it. When you were stressed before leaving Amestris, what would you do?"

Edward sat back. "Well, I would spar with Alphonse. That would clear my mind."

"Right. And you haven't been doing that because…" Winry waited for his response.

"Because he's so busy with med school. He barely has time to eat or sleep," Edward admitted. He missed his brother even though they lived together.

"Okay. So, you need to do something physical. When was the last time you exercised?" Winry asked.

Edward frowned. It had been a long time and his body was much softer than it had been before. "It's been a while."

"Well you need to start back. And I could use some too. We can do some together. Like go for walks together. Or if you need to do more than that, you can go for a run. You need to recognize the symptoms before they get worse. Like the way you breathe or feel in your chest." Winry explained.

"That sounds good. I would like to go on walks with you," Edward admitted.

"Perfect. Let's do that then. And maybe we can get you on a workout routine." Winry was planning in her mind.

"Winry, how do you know about all this?" Edward asked.

"I had a few soldiers that were under my care. They told me how they had to handle their stress from wartimes. Exercise was a big one." Winry seemed excited to do something together with him, and for Edward to get better.

"Alright. I think my arm needs to heal before I do any pushups though."

"Well let's start with walking, and leg exercises. Maybe even some sit-ups," she suggested. She did miss seeing his abs from when he was younger and in shape.

Winry then stood up and retrieved a glass with ice from the kitchen. She poured herself a glass of cognac. She started to drink, and Edward was mystified. "Since when do you drink?"

Winry smirked "Well I'm an adult just like you. I can drink when I want to. I just chose not to until I felt better. And I am feeling better. Not one hundred percent but more like eighty five percent."

Edward replied "That's great. I noticed you've put on some weight. Like healthy weight. Not fat."

He felt Winry's glare at him. He put his face in his hands.

"I'm so terrible about this. I mean you look better than when you first arrived." He looked up at her. "You smile more. You look like you're happier."

"That's because I am. And look at the time, I need to get dinner started. Oh, what did you mean when you were talking about another version of Alphonse?" Winry got up and went to cook dinner while Edward explained the concept of a parallel world to her. And how his double and Alphonse's counterpart had already died. He never saw Winry's double but asked if she heard any voices after arriving, and she denied it.

Edward got an idea. "So tomorrow, want to meet for lunch? I can take you to the lab afterwards and you can meet the people I work with there. Also, it'll be a good example of the parallel worlds that I'm talking about."

Winry agreed to it. She was excited to see who these people were, and what Edward actually meant by having a double or another version of someone.

The next day, Edward and Winry met at a café that was across the street from the university. They frequently were patrons there as it was close enough to the university that Edward could meet her there during his lunch breaks. They tried to have lunch a few times a week. On other days, Winry would be running errands for them and have lunch at home. Alphonse was still working overnight so he would sleep through lunch.

After lunch, Edward walked with Winry to the chemistry department. He showed her the lab and then led her to his office. They turned the corner and saw a receptionist at the desk. Winry abruptly stopped walking when she saw who it was.

Edward whispered "It's her double. Just act naturally."

Edward took Winry's hand and led her to the desk. He greeted the receptionist warmly "Good afternoon Sheska."

"Good afternoon Mr. Elric. Did you have a good lunch?" Sheska asked.

"Yes, it was with my friend. I wanted to introduce you to her. This is Winry," Edward said.

Sheska stood up and reached out her hand. "Nice to meet you, Winry. My name is Sheska."

Winry snapped out of her trance and shook Sheska's hand. "It's nice to meet you too."

Edward explained "Winry and I grew up together. She just moved here, and I've been showing her around."

Sheska asked delightfully "Oh where did you move from?"

Winry replied awkwardly "The countryside."

Edward and Sheska made small talk and they started to walk towards the lab when Winry noticed a book on Sheska's desk. "What book are you reading?"

Sheska saw the book Winry was looking at. "Oh that. I am reading Pride and Prejudice right now. Do you like to read too?"

"Yes. A friend back home got me into reading. I've been reading Pride and Prejudice too," Winry answered with a smile. She finally seemed comfortable.

"Oh that's great. Would you like to get together to talk about it?"

Winry nodded, and the girls exchanged phone numbers so they could set up a time to have tea and discuss their book.

Edward and Winry then left Sheska to go to Edward's office. Winry hit him on the arm. "I can't believe you didn't warn me. She looks just like her!"

Edward snickered. "I thought your reaction would be amusing to watch. And it was priceless! You were speechless!"

Winry's vein pulsed on her forehead. She was so angry and somewhat embarrassed. Even though this wasn't her Sheska, she still didn't like to be embarrassed in front of her potential new friend. But Winry also saw that Sheska is a woman in this world with a job.

"Ed, let's be serious for a minute. Sheska has a job."

Edward's smile left his face. "Well, she's unmarried. Her mom is a seamstress, and they live together. Sheska is a few years older than us, and it has been hard for her to find a husband."

"Why?" Winry asked with concern.

"Remember I told you about the Great War? Well so many men died that there aren't enough men to get married that are her age."

"That's awful. Poor Sheska," Winry sighed.

"Well, when after I finish my project and have some more pull in the department, I'm going to see about getting her a raise."

Edward really did care for his friends. Winry's heart thumped a little in her chest as she saw this more sensitive side to him.

Edward went into his office and showed her all the books and files. He also had a few models and schematics. She loved looking at the schematics of the rockets that he and his team were working on. He took note to bring some home to her and explain in more detail. While Winry was in awe of the drawings, there was a knock on the door.

A handsome tall blonde man came in and addressed Edward about something in the lab. The man then took notice of Winry. "Oh I'm sorry, Edward. I didn't realize you had a guest."

"It's fine, Russel. This is Winry. She's a friend of mine. We grew up togeth-" Edward's introduction stopped short when Russel had taken Winry's hand and kissed it.

Winry's cheeks turned a light shade of pink. She had never been greeted like this.

Russel stood up and told her "It's nice to meet you, Winry."

Winry spoke softly "It's nice to meet you too, Mr. Russel."

Edward saw red. His younger self would have punched this guy, but he had matured since then and had better self-control. Though it was starting to fade. Edward stepped between them and put his arm around Winry's lower back almost like he was claiming her. He felt this strong urge that he needed to protect her, even though this was a colleague.

"Russel, I think it's time for you to go," Edward growled.

"Calm down, Ed. She's just your friend, right?" Russel countered.

Edward scowled.

Russell then reminded him "Isn't it about time for your class to begin?"

Edward gulped and grabbed his watch out of his pocket. "Damn thing. It hasn't been working great lately. Winry, I won't have time to walk you back. You think you can find your way home?"

Winry seemed unsure. Russel then offered "Well I can walk her home."

Edward was hellbent on not having Winry alone with Russel. "Or she can come to class with me. What do you want to do, Win? You want to watch me teach?"

Winry looked between both men. She could sense their wills each trying to dominate the other but the ball was in her court.

"Ed, I would love to see you teach. If that's alright," Winry made her choice.

"Great! You'll have a front row seat. "Come on or we'll be late," Edward took her by the hand, and pulled Winry out of his office. Russel left and went down the hall to sulk. Edward still held her hand as they walked down the hall.

Winry asked "What was that all about?"

"I don't like how he was treating you," Edward muttered.

"It wasn't that bad. He was just flirting," Winry told him.

Edward sighed and slowed down. He whispered in her ear. "Listen, he's known to be a flirt with the ladies. He has a different girlfriend every week. I just don't think you deserve that."

Winry was again taken aback by Edward's kindness. He truly did care about his friends, and she was one of them. She wondered though what did she deserve here? And now that this was her new world, when would she start dating again? She turned back to Edward.

"I can kind of see that now. He was really forward," Winry admitted.

Edward nodded in agreement with her. Winry noticed they were still holding hands. She had such a huge crush on him when they were younger. And then it was ruined when he disappeared. She still had feelings for him then. But after the second time he came back to this world and left her with the broken pieces of her heart, she had to put them back together again and move on. And now here is the opportunity to be with him again. But could she give her heart to him again? And to trust that it wouldn't be shattered? She sighed. She would have to ponder this long and hard. She squeezed his hand to reassure him and herself that their bond of friendship was still there.

Author's note: This chapter was supposed to have another scene in it but when I wrote that scene, it was much longer than I anticipated. I hope you look forward to it. It's going to be a little more lighter as Edward and Winry are healing. Thank you for commenting and leaving a kudos. Please keep them coming as it keeps me motivated.

As for the content, World War 1 did cause a shortage of men in a certain age range. It really was more difficult for women to find a husband. So Sheska being single would be understandable.

And exercise is a big stress reducer in anxiety. When I feel it coming on, I do squats or jumping jacks to help work out the extra adrenaline that builds up. I also keep up a regular exercise routine, and fit in some meditation during the week. I've been slacking on that last part but at least I keep exercising.