Wednesday Morning…

After last night's revelations, Olivia thought she'd toss and turn trying to get rest. But surprisingly, she slept better than she's had in a ridiculous and sad amount of time, feeling more energetic than normal upon waking. She gets up, stretches at the side of the bed, pulls on a sports bra, yoga pants and an oversized shirt before heading out.

With every strike of her foot against the pavement she gets a flash of Elliot's confession.

"I fell in love with you."

But she tries to put it out of her mind and continues to run. Olivia manages 3 miles before she's back at the front door of their shared condo, out of breath and unsurprised to find him in the kitchen. He finishes blending a smoothie, splitting it, pouring two glasses and handing one to her.

"Thank you."

"You do know there's a small gym in here too, right?" Elliot asks. "The treadmill looks like something professional athletes use."

"I needed the fresh air."

Judging from his sweat-soaked clothes, Olivia's certain he's speaking about the gym from recent experience.

"This is good," she comments. "What's in it?"

"Vanilla whey protein, oat milk, strawberries, bananas, collagen for joint health and a little flax seed," he responds. "Everything for growing boys and girls," he adds, smiling.

"And it's filling too I—

"—Liv?

"Yeah?"

"Can we talk about last night?"

"Nothing to talk about."

She takes her smoothie into the kitchen and starts cleaning as she sips.

"Did hearing how I feel make you uncomfortable?"

"No," she says, immediately. "Uncomfortable isn't the adjective I'd used to describe my emotional response to your…confession."

He watches as she puts all the ingredients away, wipes down the counter, rinses the blender cup and pops it inside the dishwasher.

"Noah said you clean when you're anxious, or worried…or angry," he says, approaching her. "I don't think I've ever noticed until now."

"Sounds like you interrogated my kid," Olivia says, facing him, sipping her drink. "And I cleaned because it was necessary."

Elliot gets closer, takes the towel from her hand as she leans back against the counter, crossing her arms over her chest.

"You pretty much said you never wanna see me again once this is over," he starts. "But we still have a few days here, Liv," he points out. "I don't want things to be awkward between us."

"Why would things be awkward?" She asks, finishing off the last of the smoothie then putting the cup in the dishwasher and hitting the start button.

"Liv, I get—

"—Just because I was good enough to risk my life, my pension and save the lives of your wife and child," she begins. "Good enough to fall in love with even, but not enough to warrant a goodbye," she adds. "Now why would that be awkward?"

"I wish the gym came with boxing gloves, then maybe you could just kick my ass and get it over with," he says. "It'd probably hurt less."

"I don't think Lemons to Lemonade covers domestic violence."

She unfolds her arms, walks out of the kitchen.

"I'll be working in my room until it's time for the next session," she tells him. "And whatever your plans are for lunch and dinner, leave me out of them," she adds. "I can take care of myself."

Olivia's halfway across the living room when she hears it.

"When did you know?"

The question effectively stops her.

"Know what, Elliot?"

"That you fell in love with me too," he answers. "You're not this angry without feeling something."

She doesn't respond, just shakes her head and leaves him standing there, his question unanswered.

Several Hours Later…

Elliot emerges from his room donning a steel-gray sweater and black slacks to find Olivia on the sofa, clad in a maroon blouse, coordinated plaid knit skirt and tall cognac leather boots. But the compass, is now gone.

And while she did spend the majority of the last few hours doing work, she also had a video session with Dr. Lindstrom. Her short answers to his questions had him quickly deducing that she was pissed and he was even quicker at figuring out the source.

"You hadn't yelled or expressed your anger at him for the way he left prior to last night?" He asked.

"No. At first, it was because he was grieving," she began. "Then it was because he was constantly putting himself in danger and I was worried," she added. "Then suddenly…he made it pretty clear that he wants an intimate relationship with me."

"And to do that, he must've been under the impression that you'd sufficiently addressed how he left," the doctor told her. "And perhaps…that you'd forgiven him?"

"Yeah," she answered. "We've worked a few cases together. I've introduced him to Noah," she added. "I thought I'd dealt with the way he left; thought I'd let it go."

"What changed?"

"He told me he knew he was in love with me when he left."

"We've established that over the course of your partnership, your feelings for Elliot grew to something more than platonic," he began. "Did you think he didn't reciprocate?"

She'd thought back to how petty, jealous and overprotective he was with Kurt and Dean Porter. And, how one of the first questions he wanted to know was how many men she'd been with in his absence. Those are not things platonic friends worry about.

"No," she answered. "I just thought I was better at hiding it."

"What part of him confessing what you already suspected made you so angry, Olivia?"

"That he could leave, that he was strong enough to actually make it stick without—

"—Giving into the pull to see or contact you?"

"Yes," she told him. "And I know how petty that sounds but it's the truth. He disappeared for a decade when I couldn't manage it for longer than a few months," she vented. "If he was so in love with me…I just don't get how he could've done that."

"Other than angry, how does it make you feel?"

"Abandoned," she answered. "But he was…the married one. The one with the family."

"Sounds like an impossible decision," Lindstrom told her. "A damned if he did and damned if he didn't type of situation. So, I'll go back to my original advice."

"Forgive him and work on a path forward or forgive him and let him go," Olivia reminded herself. "Or…I guess not forgiving him is also an option."

"Correct," he agreed. "But forgiveness isn't for him, it's for you," he said. "He's already in your heart but he'll stay in your head too if you don't learn to let go."

"That explains a lot," she murmured. "Maybe the fact that I finally expressed my anger is the reason I slept so well last night."

"It's possible but it's also been three years," he pointed out. "Perhaps your professional relationship is the only sustainable one," he concluded. "In the end, only you can make that decision, Olivia."

Forgiveness or not, she won't be able to treat him like Andy, Dean or Cassidy and work with him with the way things are – not without wondering what could've been, what they could've had. Unlike those men, she wasn't over Elliot because you don't simply get over the love of your life.

After the session she was less angry but couldn't look in the mirror, see that beautiful compass and not be reminded of Elliot and how he was able to do what she couldn't. Then again, she didn't have a husband and children to put first. If the tables were turned, Olivia can't say she wouldn't have done the same thing. But knowing that doesn't make it hurt any less.

"Ready to go?" He asks.

"Yeah," she tells him. "Let's do it."

Inside Lemons to Lemonade…

In a room of earth tones, synthetic Ficus trees and nature-based wall art, Elliot and Olivia sit around the circle with the other group members as Maurice speaks. The loveseats are more spread out, at least six feet apart, taking each corner of the sizeable room. And their resident therapist walks down the center of the space, addressing them.

"Today's topic is, 'Remembering the Friendship'," he says. "I took a little poll before this week's group started and was excited to find, that everyone here began with a platonic relationship."

The man rubs his hands together like he's won the lottery.

"And I can tell by the way most of you are holding hands," Maurice says, "Work on that Quinns," he continues pointing at Elliot and Olivia. "That the four hours of reminiscing helped rekindle some good memories for you."

The two of them spare brief looks for each other, recalling the fun they had at Coney Island.

"So today, I'd like to keep that momentum going," Maurice says. "When you're in a relationship for a long time, it's hard to get stuck on the label of wife, or husband, or partner and lose how important 'friend' is," he explains. "There's a certain weight to those aforementioned titles but 'friend' should be…lighter."

Elliot remembers how easy things were between them early in their partnership. They could work out vic/perp scenarios without worrying about where to put his hands. He could meet someone she was dating and not feel that green-eyed monster rearing its ugly head.

"Intimate relationships sometimes have unspoken expectations such as archaic gender roles like who's going to cook or take out the trash," he informs them. "They have societal and family pressures like when to have kids or the judgement of deciding not to," he continues. "But one thing regarding intimate partners that could also apply to friends is…unforgiveness."

Olivia looks at Elliot to find his eyes are already on her. She holds his stare for a moment before refocusing her attention on Maurice.

"Reliving the trauma that caused the offense with these exercises can strain any relationship whether intimate or platonic," he advises. "And as much as I'd love to say that I've turned every couple's lemons into lemonade, the inability to forgive someone is not something I can fix in a week-long seminar."

Luckily for the captain, she has her own shrink. She may lie to him every once in a while, but he's been consistently good at detecting her bullshit and getting to what's real.

"For today's exercise I want each of you to forget the intimate relationship you started all those years ago and…remember…your…friendship," he says, dramatically. "Talk to your person, tell them your worries, your gossip and whatever excites you as if the trials that brought you here never happened," he suggests. "Alright! Have at it, people!"

They go through the motion of facing each other, still avoidant of one another's gaze and don't speak a word for several minutes.

"We should probably start talking before he wanders over here," Elliot suggests. "We already have his attention for being the only ones not holding hands."

Olivia takes a breath and decides to make an effort.

"I'm really angry at my husband," she surprises him with after meeting his eyes. "He was faced with an impossible decision and though I know he made the right one, it left me feeling…very alone."

Tears prick her eyes but she doesn't let them fall.

"Well…he sounds like a real asshole."

Olivia manages a small grin in spite of herself.

"Has the prick at least owned up to this thing that hurt you so much?"

"Yeah," she admits. "But the way I see him…it's changed."

Elliot nods his understanding and visibly cringes but presses on.

"I hope you plan on making him work like a dog for your forgiveness," he tells her. "Is he doing the right things to atone?"

"He's more honest and communicative than he used to be," Olivia answers. "He tells me there's nothing I could ask that he'd say no to," she goes on. "And…he's not a bad cook."

They grin remembering last night's Tuscan chicken mac and cheese.

"What about you, friend?" She asks.

"Coincidentally, my wife is mad at me too," Elliot says. "I'd rather be shot in the foot with a nail gun than deal with her wrath," he adds. "But I don't know what to do to fix it."

"Maybe it can't be fixed," she offers, honestly. "She'll let go of the anger when she's ready but more than anything, she probably just needs you to understand how thoroughly you fucked up and how willing you are to make amends."

"I do and I am," he asserts. "Because I miss her. We had this innate, unspoken…thing, that I've never had with anyone else," he confesses, voice deep with emotion. "She knows my propensity for asshole behavior yet when I was at my lowest point…she was still right there in my corner."

Without thinking, Olivia palms his face, using her thumbs to swipe away warm tears she doesn't think he's even aware of.

"My wife means the world to me," he goes on. "I'd do anything to earn her forgiveness because I can't lose her."

Remembering her own pain, she drops her hands from his face.

"I think we've done a good job covering concerns," Olivia says, swiping at her own few errant tears. "We should get into some gossip and what we're excited for."

Elliot nods his agreement.

"I hear one of your junior associates decided to leave," he says, alluding to Muncy's departure to the DEA. "I'm sorry to hear that, I know you had high hopes for her."

"She is and…I did," Olivia admits. "Now I have a stack of resumes to look through," she adds, selling the point to whoever may be listening. "I have my eye on a promising associate at another firm in Brooklyn," she says, meaning Jet. "Maybe I can poach her."

"You should definitely try," Elliot tells her with a wink. "Now about my gossip."

"Since when do you gossip?"

"Okay so it's not really gossip, more of a prediction," he says. "I think my engineer is ready for the lead architect job," he continues, talking about Bell possibly making lieutenant.

"That's great, Pat," Olivia tells him. "She's definitely earned it and I'm sure she'll be excited."

"What are you excited about?"

It sounds like a safe question but his eyes darken and his focus takes a quick subtle dip to her mouth before meeting her gaze again. But he doesn't reach for her hand. He's trying to follow her lead for once and being patient.

"I'm excited about this season," she answers. "Taking a drive to see the changing of the leaves, drinking warm apple cider during a walk in Central Park," she adds with a smile. "Relaxing in front of a cozy fire."

"Watching the little kids in their costumes during Halloween," Elliot picks up. "Freezing my ass off in Jersey watching the Jets play," he continues. "I'm excited about this season too."

He holds her eyes for a few moments and this time she doesn't look away. Elliot wants to think there's an inkling of hope in her irises but the cloud of sadness points more to resignation than anything.

The two are interrupted by loud claps from Maurice.

"Alright folks, we have reached the end of today's session," he begins. "I hope you found it helpful and that you were able to reintroduce yourselves to the friends you started out as," he merrily goes on. "For in two short days, you will be attempting to reignite, unless you already have," he laughs. "The fires of your intimate relationship in our past couples' favorite meeting titled, Sensuous Whispers."

The group starts a small round of applause including Elliot and Olivia.

"As for tomorrow's exercise, since you all seemed to have enjoyed today's session so much, I'd like for everyone to continue with it," he instructs. "Make each other laugh, cook together, find a television show to make fun of, talk about the things that matter and just…remember…the…friendship. See you Friday, good people."

Once Elliot and Olivia make it inside the SUV, she turns to him.

"We've already done all that," she points out. "And I don't know about you but for the first time in months, I'm caught up on paperwork."

"Don't look at me," he tells her. "I thought up our last little adventure and repeatedly got my ass kicked for my troubles."

Elliot smiles as he starts the SUV but Olivia's focus is on her watch before meeting his eyes.

"I wasn't trying to get you to think of anything," she says, her tone more serious. "I said that to say, I'm gonna video chat with Noah once dance is over in about 30 minutes and then I'm taking some time for myself," she explains. "Probably won't be back to the condo 'til after dinner."

He knows she's not going to her apartment. They have to maintain the cover. Whatever it is, he hopes it helps her heal. But he also recognizes her avoidance of him for what it is. Self-protection. From him. And he hates it. It's every fear he had once he revealed the truth of not contacting her those ten years. Yet he knew honesty was the bare minimum that she deserves. Selfishly, he still wants the chance to show her everything else she could have.

"Ah, okay," Elliot tells her, obviously disappointed. "Just…take care of yourself, Liv."

"Always."