The Drama Podcast Chapter 4: Dawn, a total drama series fanfic

SideshowJazz1: Thanks for reading! Your "Dear Fanfiction Writers" are among my Top 10 fics in TD Fandom. Funny and in character!

Summary: Bowie and Priya welcome Dawn, a Revenge of The Island contestant. The Moonchild talks about her life, her alleged magical powers, Scott and her thoughts on his fame among the Total Drama fandom.

Warning: Embarrassing teen topics in this chapter!

Priya: Hi! My name is Priya.

Bowie: And mine is Bowie.

Priya: We were the finalists of the new season of Total Drama Island, available worldwide on HBO. The producers asked us to promote the rebooted series in some exciting way, so we decided to do a podcast with some of the former contestants!

Bowie: In each episode, we will interview a contestant who has left their mark on the show. Can you imagine how much backstage gossip there is? Me neither.

Priya: Today, we welcome one of the most famous contestants from Season 4, Revenge of The Island. She may have been eliminated early, but she won the hearts and minds of everyone who watched that season: a warm welcome for Dawn!

Dawn: Greetings, everyone! Let's have a great afternoon today.

She wore a light blue bandana around her head, a purple patterned blouse, worn jeans and flip flops, and a nose piercing. Unlike the hosts, Dawn was sitting in the lotus position.

Opening

A screen is filled with photos of Dawn's iconic moments on the show, like her audition video, her meditation in the cabin at night, her opening the confessional door with her foot, and the moment of her elimination.

The camera zooms out, showing that the thousands of photos make the words The Drama Podcast.

Priya: You looked...different from when you participated in ROTI.

Dawn: Do you believe that many say that? They think I should dress like a hippie or a grandma just because I'm into an alternative lifestyle.

Bowie: And what alternative lifestyle is that?

Dawn: Ecosocialism, veganism, non-monogamy, drug legalization...you name it.

Bowie: Wow, You're pretty progressive, aren't you?

Dawn: I know it sounds kind of stereotypical, but I was born and raised in Eugene, Oregon. My parents belonged to the counterculture movements of the 1970s that called for an end to the Vietnam War. You know, that kind of stuff.

Priya: So, you aren't Canadian?

Dawn: No, why?

Priya: I thought only Canadians could compete in Total Drama. Like, for tax breaks and government funding.

Bowie: Priya, you know I'm from the United States, right?

Priya: YOU ARE!?

Bowie facepalms due to the ignorance of his colleague.

Priya: Wow, my mind exploded with this info...

Dawn: From what I'm getting from her aura, she wasn't messing with you, Bowie. She really thought there were only Canadians in Total Drama.

Bowie pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration.

Bowie: Goddammit, girl.

Dawn: You'll be even more shocked when you find out that most of ROTI's cast are American; the only one who was Canadian was Staci. All others were American.

Priya: WHAT!?

Bowie: SHUSH. Explain this quickly, Dawn. How Chris got only one Canadian?

Dawn adjusted herself in her chair and stretched her legs out a little.

Dawn: This was not widely publicized by the public but when they announced that there would be a fourth season and it would be made in the US, it caused a frenzy. I think I still have the video they made back then. Can you pass it on to the audience?

Bowie: Pass it via Bluetooth that the production plays on the screen.

Dawn: Okay.

Dawn did as instructed. After two minutes, the video was ready to be shown.

Video: Total Drama Revenge Of The Island Test Collection Announcement

Chris: Yo! This is Chris McLean. You may know me as the host of the Total Drama franchise: Total Drama Island, Total Drama Action and our new release Total Drama Worl Tour.

The camera panned to scenes from all three seasons as he named each one.

Chris: You laughed, you cried, you even felt nauseous.

Scenes of Leshawna slapping Heather, Duncan and Gwen's kiss and naked Cody in the Amazon appear, respectively.

Chris: As our popularity skyrocketed with the addition of Alejandro and Sierra, I reached out to Fresh TV executives about the possibility of opening up the selection of new contestants. And guess what? They loved it! That's why we're going to do a new season of the show with teenagers from the biggest fandom we have in the world: the Americans! Neighbours, you won't miss this opportunity, huh?

Chris pulls a string, revealing the fabulous $1 million prize.

Chris: me and Chef Hatchet to get that 1 million bucks or die trying! Just kidding!

Chris: If you think you have what it takes to win, send us a presentation video to the email on the screen with the registration form duly completed by August 23rd.

Chef: We are giving you two months to think and apply, don't leave for the last minute, your maggots!

Chris pushes Chef off-screen.

Chris: You heard him! Don't leave at the last minute! Also, if you don't have a passport, don't worry: if you are approved, we will take care of all the legal procedures so that you can travel internationally.

Chef tries to get back on screen, but Chris holds him back. The two struggle.

Chris: Ouch! Get off, man!

Chef: Make me, fuzzy pants!

The camera cuts to a sign that reads, "Go on to . for further details".

Dawn: As you can see, we were deceived from start to finish. All of us, myself included, thought it would be a World Tour-style season, hence the reason for the passports.

Priya: Why was Staci called if the season was focused on Americans?

Dawn: I don't know, but I suspect he wanted someone sure to be eliminated in the first episode. I'm not spiteful or easily angered, but she was as annoying as she looked. Mother Gaia forgive me, but you don't know how happy I was when she picked up that toxic marshmallow and was catapulted.

Bowie and Priya gasped in surprise.

Bowie: I'm surprised you're so candid about saying that.

Dawn: I would be lying if I mince my words about Staci. She interrupted my meditation every time I did it by the pool at Playa. Every. Single. Time.

Priya: Did you guys stay at Playa until the show was over?

Dawn: Surprisingly, the location was really nice.

Bowie: Okay, I think we're already breaking the ice. Let's go to the show itself.

Dawn: Right.

Bowie: With that aura reading conversation with B, you start the program mysteriously. This aura thing is bullshit or real?

Dawn sighed.

Dawn: I've answered this question thousands of times, but I'll say it again for the audience's sake: aura reading is real. It is the very expression of one's soul. You just wouldn't have a soul if you were a robot.

Priya: Even animals and plants have a soul? I think my parents believe that too.

Dawn: This is real, not something out of cartoons like levitating, reading minds or controlling people by voice. One of the great failings of white science today is ignoring epistemologies that replication methods cannot prove.

Bowie: Okay... how did you stay dry when the yacht blew out?

Dawn: I admit that saying I had found a shortcut was a stretch. But the truth is more far-fetched: when the yacht exploded, I was catapulted overboard, but an eagle held me to shore.

Priya: An Eagle?

Bowie: I agree. This is more bullshit than saying you found a shortcut. What are the odds!?

Dawn: I know! Before the show, I was never a very popular kid, so I was trying to avoid the weird reputation I had.

Priya: It reminded me that you could talk to the animals on the island. Was that real too?

Dawn: More or less. I can differentiate what they say in terms of knowing their emotions. I can't talk to them.

Bowie: Is predicting the future also something you can do normally? Because you were right when you said Dakota would suffer a lot if she stayed on the island.

Dawn: I can do it the conventional way through tea leaves and tarot cards. As I said, I am a human, not an ancient magical entity.

Priya: I assume you voted for her based on the cards, right?

Dawn: Yes, the curious thing is that the letters said that, at the same time that she would suffer a lot if she stayed on the island, it also said that she would find her true love there. I ignored the last part because there was a possible statistical error when reading it in tarot.

Bowie: Statistical error? In tarot?

Dawn: More common than you would like to believe. See: when reading tarot cards, the same card can mean two or even three different things. That's why context matters. The same card can say that you will be rich or have erectile dysfunction for the rest of your life.

Priya: Wow.

Dawn: Many think it's just choosing the cards as a magic trick. It is not.

Bowie: Let's change the subject before I get distracted by all this card talk. I say your relations with the other campers did not end very well because of this aura reading. You said Zoey was lonely because she was an only child...

Dawn: Correct.

Bowie: Dakota's desire for fame is a "depressed cry for love"...

Dawn: Yes.

Bowie: And that Brick was teased as a kid, had bladder issues and needed to be dominated.

Dawn: I don't see any lies in what I said. You can say that I was very crude when I said these things, but none were a lie or a levity.

Bowie: But wasn't being crude something that hurt you?

Dawn: Sometimes, people need to be self-aware of certain things. Zoey entered the program because she felt lonely in a small town; Dakota confessed what I already knew to a therapist; and Brick...it didn't take much to know when he screamed at night because of the dark or the rivalry he harbored for Jo.

Priya: We already know what you think about Staci. Do you think your team's elimination was unfair? Whereas your totem arrived first.

Dawn: I knew Chris McLean's fame, but that's when I got the full dimension of what he was like. It was completely unfair, and we protested until the elimination ceremony.

Priya: The next episode was your first interaction with Fang. How did you react?

Dawn's eye twitched a little.

Dawn:...not good. The worst thing for me wasn't Fang, who was evil. It was water torture. I mean, I know how to swim. But being tied to a chair and getting submerged from time to time or electrocuted was something I heard from my parents when I asked them why they were so opposed to the Vietnam War. And we were in fresh water, the shocks were even worse.

Bowie: And as the challenge was closed before, few participated. Thanks to Cameron's big mouth, we know his embarrassing secret and Mike's plot is developed later. My point is, what embarrassing secret would be yours?

Dawn once again straightened in her chair.

Dawn: This question is a tough one. Knowing that Chris digs into our personal lives, I think it was very intimate, as I'm usually very open about my problems and issues. Some situations are like that, but I don't think he could put it on television.

Priya: Like what?

Dawn: Catching my mother masturbating.

Bowie spit out the water he was drinking; Priya was speechless. Dawn just blushed with embarrassment at the revelation.

Bowie: Okay, that DEFINITELY something he could not put on television. Oh my god!

Priya: How did this happen? Parents catching their children doing it...that's reason enough to bury themselves in a hole. A daughter catching her mother doing it is even worse.

Dawn: First, I want to clarify that I'm not condemning her for that. Everyone, regardless of age, has the right to pleasure. Second, it was my fault.

Bowie and Priya looked at each other, waiting for the conclusion of Dawn's reasoning.

Dawn: I was, like, 15 years old. I went to school like any other day, I even remember having chemistry and PE classes. As I was always ignored during gym class because I was labeled "the weird one," I decided to say that I couldn't continue because of the cramps. My house wasn't that far from school, it was a half-hour walk.

Bowie: That's a long way off for me.

Dawn: I opened the front door without problems when I got home. But I already felt that there was something strange in the air. Usually, my mom held yoga classes in the living room, and she wasn't there. I checked the kitchen, and nothing. I checked the yard, and nothing of her appeared. So I decided to go upstairs to the bedrooms.

Priya: Oh no...

Dawn: When I got up, I heard a buzz. Like it was a warning to stay the hell out of her room. But that stopped me? No!

Bowie: I already know where this is going...

Dawn: To make matters worse, the door was not closed. When I opened it, I saw her all open on the bed, bottomless.

Dawn: She screamed, I screamed. Interestingly, that day was the first conversation about sex I had in my life. Though rather baffling given the context.

Priya: No wonder Chris couldn't use this on that challenge; the PG rating might be obliterated!

Dawn: I'm glad he didn't even get a chance to use that against me. Sorry Mom, but this would be exposed at one time or another.

The Moonchild grabs a water bottle while Priya and Bowie write something in a notebook.

Bowie: Now let's talk about Ice Ice Baby and Backstabbers Ahoy!

Bowie: It's impossible to discuss you without mentioning Scott in those two challenges.

Dawn: I should not have trusted Scott about the elimination of B. The TV didn't show it, but he was the only one who didn't avoid me or get scared of my "powers". In hindsight, Scott really did have an aura of a rat. Unreliable.

Priya: Come to think, you burned him, saying that he wasn't held enough as a child.

Dawn: At the time, I hadn't spoken with the intention of humiliating, but if it were today, I would have spoken out of malice.

Bowie: I'm surprised by that comment, considering your pacifist outlook.

Dawn: Pacifism does not prevent us from being idiots with those who do evil. Scott was a team killer and a GOOD team killer. Think about what you did with Caleb all season long. That's Scott.

Priya: Was your relationship with your team tumultuous then? And with the remaining girls?

Dawn: The one perk of being the only girl on the team was that the cabin was all mine. So I had more freedom to do my morning exercises and meditate. On the other hand, it was difficult to deal with the boys. I'm not talking about Lightning and Scott's sexism, I'm talking about being able to dialogue with them outside of challenges. It was impossible!

Dawn: Brick and Sam were really nice people, although they each lived in their private world.

Dawn: And about the girls: Jo was very defensive about her condition, Anne Maria only cared about herself and her "relationship" with Vito; Dakota couldn't interact with us because she was an intern.

Dawn: And Zoey...she was much more nasty than the cameras made out for the public. She judged everyone with an air of superiority without realizing it. It was like she was a mere spectator at ROTI, watching us fuck each other while she was the moral standard.

Bowie: Where I heard something similar, Priya?

Priya looked away at Bowie's suggestive comment about a certain reboot persona.

Priya: I-I don't know what are you implying...

Dawn: See, I don't say she was a bad girl. But she wasn't the saint portrayed during ROTI and All-Stars. Far from it.

Priya: And no theme or activity united you girls? None?

Dawn tapped her chin, trying to remember something

Dawn: Well...there was something we did together...but I think Jo had better come over and clarify.

Priya: Write that down, Bowie!

Bowie: Roger!

Dawn: As I said, we were not on good terms. And that explains how Scott could pin the blame on me for those stolen belongings. I had no allies!

Priya: Oh, I liked your swimsuit in that episode. Very cute!

Dawn: Thanks! I did it myself. In 2010 there weren't many vegan stores in Eugene, so I had to improvise.

Bowie: And when did you realize that you would be eliminated?

Dawn: When Scott "exposed" me. I knew he had set me up, but this time there was no one to hear my side of the story. So I fought against time to find the immunity idol, and apparently, I managed it relatively easily: I was on the beach's edge, on top of a coconut tree.

Priya: But it was not the real immunity idol.

Dawn: Exactly. When Chris pointed it out, I was shocked. I tried to warn everyone about how vile Scott was, but they interrupted me.

Bowie: And they catapulted you inside that trash bag. How was it when you landed?

Dawn: Painful. There were some sharp things, so when I fell, it pierced my body. I remember that it was B who came to help me. I was fine, but there were cuts on my arms and forehead.

Priya: And how was watching the rest of the season?

Dawn: When you're eliminated, all the weight on your back feels gone. Seeing the other challenges from afar, especially the ones after the merger, was much more enjoyable. The Heather cameo was funny. I wish I had been in that episode just to feel her aura.

Dawn: I would also like to witness Commando Zoey. It was a 180-degree turn Zoey did to survive.

Priya: It was really a radical change. I remember when I watched it, I was amazed.

Dawn: When she was eliminated, everyone applauded her except Scott. He was in a near-vegetative state. The television didn't show it, but there was a trail of blood from where he landed after being launched by the catapult to the resort.

The co-hosts cringed, thinking of the pain.

Bowie: I'd like to go back to your comment about Heather. You only read the aura when you are close to the person? What does ours say?

Dawn stared at Bowie momentarily, nodding a little in understanding. The same happened with Priya.

Dawn: Even though we've talked for almost an hour, you still think I'm fooling you. You are also afraid that your brother will come here because you know he will embarrass you on the internet when he tells about the time he caught you watching gay porn.

Bowie's jaw dropped. He blushed instantly and lost any form of speech cohesion.

Dawn: And you, Priya, are afraid that I know you're afraid of me because you think I can curse you. And no, I don't think Millie behaved like Zoey.

Priya pogged in surprise.

Dawn: Any more guesswork, my dears?

She leaned back in her chair with a smug look.

Bowie: No more, thanks.

Priya: Awesome!

Bowie: So...hmm...why did you support Cameron instead of Lightning?

Dawn: It was a very easy choice. Cameron would share the money with everyone. Lightning wanted to win to make up for his lack of validation from his father. And I assure you that he kept his promise; we received nearly $77,000. And we still saw Chris get arrested!

Dawn giggled, remembering the scene.

Priya: And now for life after Total Drama. Did you manage to earn the respect of your schoolmates?

Dawn: A little. I was most shocked by how popular I became in subsequent months. It felt like I was the one who made it to the finals and not Cameron or Lightning. When there were calls for All-Stars I wasn't formally invited, but there were petitions for FreshTV to make me a fan favorite! It was crazy!

Bowie: I imagine fame helped you in your adult life, right?

Dawn: I managed to sell the trinkets I collected on the island, but that was not enough to buy the island and protect the mutated fauna and flora. The result we all saw in the All-Stars final. Poor creatures...

A melancholy look appeared on her face.

Dawn: On the bright side, my exposure to the program helped me be an influential activist in my home state. I remember preventing the violent eviction of the Occupy Eugene protesters and helping with the legislative change that legalized edibles across Oregon.

Bowie: You have been involved in controversies during the pandemic. The Register Guard did a series of reports on how you encouraged the non-use of masks during the lockdown period. "Don't let [Kate] Brown, then governor of Oregon, tell us what to do in Eugene", it would have been said by you. Was that true?

Dawn: The Register Guard has always been a disservice to Eugene residents. These articles prove the intention of manipulating my words to satisfy the local elite. When I spoke about masks, I was referring to the lack of standardization by municipal management. And that quote actually refers not to not wearing masks but to how protesters should behave in response to the death of George Floyd. I sued that newspaper afterwards and won. In Oregon Justice and the Ninth Court.

Priya: And did these reports tarnish your image as a community leader?

Dawn: Quite. They said I supported Trump and was adept at vaccine conspiracy theories. Only now that the truth has been established, do people have confidence in what I say. When I was invited to join the Kansas women's reproductive rights rally last year, reactionaries used those headlines to cast doubt on the referendum. Thankfully, the proposal was largely rejected, which could have poisoned the public.

Bowie: Also, in the same newspaper, some articles discuss your edibles store and hobbies. Especially the nudist trekking.

Dawn: That is indeed true! People find it strange, but it is one of the most genuine ways to connect with nature. We have clothing-optional beaches, why not trails as well?

Bowie: Right...

Priya receives a warning through the electronic point.

Priya: Well, it looks like our conversation is coming to an end! In closing, I would like to ask you what experiences you got from ROTI and Total Drama in general.

Dawn: I've always had a very mixed view of the show. On the one hand, the exposure I gained helped me become who I am today. But on the other hand, that program shows the worst of human beings and, honestly, it only hurts and tears apart those who participate for a long time. I am very happy to have a considerable fandom even with little screen time. Also, come to see me in Eugene sometime!

Priya: Great! Bowie, any final thoughts?

Bowie: ...I'll pass.

Priya: Woah, really?

Dawn: He doesn't want to admit he was wrong about me.

Dawn snickers while Bowie groans

Bowie: Ugh! Fine! You really do have special powers. Satisfied?

Dawn: Thank you.

Bowie: But I still think that you're overrated.

Priya: I'm so grateful you're here, Dawn. We said goodbye here. Don't forget to share this episode on social media and comment here and on The Drama Bits! Bye-bye!

Bowie and Dawn: Bye-Bye!

Thumbnails for THE DRAMA BITS: